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Donghyuck might be shorter than Johnny, but his height didn't define his capacity in fighting, and that was one of many things he learnt through his education to handle weapons. Donghyuck could count on how precise, perceptive and fast he was, to overwhelm his opponent and have the upper hand. Johnny's technique was more based on his own strength, on the power every move extruded. Donghyuck didn't want to get Johnny's punch right in the face or in his plexus – that would mean directly losing – so he knew how to protect his vital points, twirling around the older to tire him and make every little attack count. One snowflake isn't much, but at some point one snowflake on top of all of the others will make a tree branch split under the weight, right?
However, his mind wasn't enough concentrated on the training, and Johnny wasn't sparing him. Even if Donghyuck had been able to counter with good moves, Johnny ended the session by pushing Donghyuck on the ground while he was dodging what he realized was a ruse.
He didn't realize he was with his back against the sandy soil, disoriented by the force of Johnny's punch, until he felt Johnny's foot teasing his throat. Donghyuck whined, blinked a few times to stop his head from buzzing, and met Johnny's calm and triomphant air.
“Not too good this morning, Hyuck?”
“You didn't have to go this hard on me,” Donghyuck mumbled. He was ashamed, to be honest.
Donghyuck could win against Johnny, but it wasn't every time. If Johnny could still be successful against him, did Donghyuck really deserve to protect Mark? Wouldn't he be more of a burden than anything else?
“I can hear you thinking, and it's been like that since you arrived for our usual training. Do you really want to go to Mark later with that horrible face of yours? He'll get all confused and worried and will ask you to go get some rest, and I know you hate it when he acts like this. You can't protect him if you're in that state, you know.”
The sun was barely out, shining with shy rays through the high windows of the room. All of Donghyuck's sessions were usually before dawn, so he'd be done with it and be able to spend the day by Mark's side as one of his protectors. Mark had several, and even if Donghyuck knew who the others were and that they were selected wisely, he could only be serene if he was the one seeing with his own eyes Mark, if he was the one who had the responsibility to protect him for the day.
It wasn't like the country wasn't safe; if there was one place that was protected, it was in the royal palace, and even more in the vicinity of their Highnesses, and of the direct heir of the throne. But it was the tradition, and even if Mark followed the same defense lessons as Donghyuck and therefore was strong enough to fight, it wasn't his role to protect himself on top of the other duties he had. Mark often whined to Donghyuck that he was alright, that he wasn't made of glass, but Donghyuck took his duty by heart, and he would die if anything happened to Mark.
Mark knew that, even if Donghyuck never said anything. Donghyuck hid his seriousness under a mischievous stare and mocking smile. Mark could read him like an open book – almost.
“Is it because of what the cooks talked about last night that you're so fidgety?” Johnny asked, after he helped Donghyuck stand up and offered him a cloth to wipe the sweat of his face.
“Did you hear them too?” Donghyuck raised his head, finally looking somewhere else than the floor.
“So that's what's making you so negligent,” Johnny said with a triumphant smile.
Donghyuck groaned. How could he be such a novice, today.
That was all the palace employees could talk about. The big official announcement that the Queen and the King would do in a few days. Everyone was impatient, because the news – that wasn't really a news, as Mark's birthday was approaching – was related to Mark, and everyone was fond of him. Also, as some might say, they wanted something to happen in the castle again, the days passing not looking much different one from another.
Donghyuck was fidgety since weeks. He didn't like that feeling, of knowing very well that something that didn't truly please him would arrive one day or another. It was a weird sensation that squeezed his heart, and that today he had not managed to repress enough. The worst part was that even if he spent his days next to Mark, he felt far away from him and couldn't find the words he wanted to say out loud, to share his thoughts and worries, and just have Mark look at him with the soft comfort he always gave him, with that smile that he knew since they became best friends at the tender age of five years old.
Mark had been occupied with whatever work his parents and advisors assigned him with. The problem with Mark was that he would pile up an unhealthy amount of work with nothing else but a smile and a determined stare. Donghyuck would always tease him, telling him he was insane, that he was such a people pleaser, that anyway it was just papers to barely read and put his sign on, the royal family doesn't do that much. But that was only a façade to ease his mind, to make Mark lift his nose from his books and look at him and scoff, so for a moment there would only be the two of them, and Donghyuck hoped his shameless words and cheeky smile would soothe Mark's overloaded brain.
Mark would always reply though, “I can say the same for you, Hyuck. You don't have to work so hard for me.”
And Donghyuck would joke, laugh. But deep inside, he couldn't deny it, and swallowed back what he truly wanted to say – that he could do even better, work even more, take all of the weight from Mark's shoulder that came from being the direct heir of the kingdom.
But who was Donghyuck, right? Only Mark's playful childhood best friend, remembered by the Queen and the King as the child who would make Mark climb the highest tree of the royal garden as a dare. Only Mark's personal bodyguard – with two other guys – who didn't need to open his mouth and just needed to be sure to protect Mark with his life. A shadow.
Ironic with how the castle nicknamed him after the sun.
“Stop being so gloomy,” Johnny sighed. “It's gonna be alright.”
Donghyuck rolled his eyes. Easy for Johnny to say that, when Donghyuck had spent sleepless nights thinking of what would happen so soon, without any helpful solution – as if he could go against centuries of tradition.
Johnny raised an eyebrow at Donghyuck.
“You know, I didn't talk about it with you because you never said a word about it–”
“You're not my confident,” Donghyuck said a bit annoyed.
(Yeah, usually, it was Mark. Best friend privileges, you know.)
“I think you should talk with Doyoung,” Johnny continued, ignoring Donghyuck's remark, because he knew he only said that because he was upset.
But before Donghyuck could ask why, confused – why would he go talk to his family's intendant? – Johnny nudged him toward the door.
“You don't want to be late for your bodyguard duty and see Mark's confused pout.”
Donghyuck met Mark and Jeno in front of the dining room. Jeno smiled at him, eyes disappearing in softness, melting with the fatigue that was expected after having to be on duty for the night to assure Mark's security.
“Hi, Hyuck,” Mark greeted him with his – annoying, perfect, gravely – morning voice.
“Good morning, Heir of the kingdom,” Donghyuck replied, jumping to his usual teasing to forget whatever was going around his head.
Jeno chuckled, Mark rolled his eyes, and soon enough, Jeno left to go sleep while the both of them entered the dining room, where the Queen and the King were already sitting.
After the formal greetings, the royal family began to eat the plates coming from the kitchen. Donghyuck was enough used to it to relax a bit, and usually Mark's parents were calm during this time of the day, enjoying the time to bond with their unique child. The apple of their eyes.
That was when the King dropped the subject that made Donghyuck imperceptibly flinch. The subject that the whole palace was gossiping about during their duties, usual to the point they had become mechanical.
“We'll talk this afternoon about the formal competition for your marriage, Mark.”
“Yes, Father. I took the liberty to go to the archives to get some readings about all this.”
The Queen chuckled, “you know we could have answered any of your questions. Anyway, it's not like it's new, you studied it during your lessons, too. If you have any curiosity, you could even talk about it with Donghyuck. You followed the same classes, and Donghyuck's got better memory than you sometimes,” she teased, and Donghyuck smiled.
The Queen was sweet, and she wasn't wrong in a sense – but Donghyuck just felt awkward.
Mark and him had actually never talked together about the competition that was bound to happen in a matter of weeks. It was like a topic that they mutually chose not to talk about, even if the consequences of it were for sure not trivial.
Donghyuck didn't want to hear Mark asking him questions about the process that would lead Mark to his future partner, the person that would share the country with him, the person he'd love and built his life with.
“I don't want to bother Donghyuck with this kind of questions. It'd bore him, it's not that important to him.”
Donghyuck knew that Mark said that out of consideration, but it still made his heart squeeze a bit, sad, upset.
He was mad at himself. It was going to be busy weeks for Mark, not the usual busy schedules he had, but time consuming nonetheless. And Mark, once again, chose to keep his questions to himself, even if Donghyuck was probably capable to help him on simple things, to soothe his possible worry.
Donghyuck had no idea how Mark felt about what was going to happen – the competition, the marriage. The last time they talked about it together, spring was still shy, the snow lazily extending her stay in the gardens, and it felt like they had talked about a time that would never come, even if they both knew it was meant to happen.
Donghyuck remembered Mark's focused stare on the tree he'd climbed after Donghyuck's dare, when they were still children. Donghyuck had felt a wave of longing he'd never really understood, a longing that couldn't be healed by simply taking Mark's hand in his, like they were so used to. Donghyuck wondered if this longing was meant to follow him his whole life.
This summer, Mark was about to be twenty, and to finally be of age to marry.
▬▬ι═══════ﺤ -═══════ι▬▬
When he woke up the next day, Donghyuck got a message from Doyoung, asking him to come see him to talk about an important matter after his duty with Mark was done. Donghyuck remembered Johnny advised him to go see him, but he had been perceptive enough to know that he wouldn't follow his suggestion and took the matter into his own hands. Now, he couldn't ditch Doyoung's appointment.
Minutes and hours melted into each other, and Donghyuck felt restless to see Mark's birthday approaching second after second, while he couldn't do anything. Around him, he saw the guest rooms being made for the important guests, for all those noble family members that would try to woo his best friend for a piece of power. Donghyuck felt sick.
It was weird to see his home – this immense domain, divided between several buildings, the more official next to the leisure and residential ones – being prepared for such festivities. It felt like a little town in itself, showing off wealth and prosperity, the royal family surrounded by their Court. Staff was running around, trucks never stopped coming in and out with new goods.
At least, Mark could still stay out of this frenetic dance for a few more days, kept in the office. Donghyuck knew it wouldn't last long, though, because once the guests would be there, it was Mark's duty to welcome them officially.
And then those same people he'd have greeted would be the ones competing for his hand.
If only... if only Donghyuck could participate too.
As much as Donghyuck felt at home inside the castle, that had welcomed him when he was too young to understand what was happening, there were times where he felt how he didn't entirely belong.
Maybe it was his own making, maybe it was only him who put these invisible high fences that he couldn't dare trespassing, out of fear to be disappointed, to have someone telling him face to face that what he wanted was impossible. It was like Schrödinger's cat. If he didn't check his assumption, then there were as many chances it could be true than chances it could be false – Mark would nag him and tell him that in fact, both options coexisted at the same time. Whereas if he truly checked, then only one of the options would be real. And Donghyuck didn't want to know, because he was scared it wouldn't be what he wanted to hear.
For someone known to be so reckless and strong and courageous, it was a pity.
It was with an unbothered façade but a restless heart that he entered Doyoung's study room that afternoon.
Doyoung was looking through several files with his delicate glasses frame perched on his nose. He lifted his head when Donghyuck entered, offering him a soft smile, but Donghyuck could still see the seriousness in his eyes. He nonchalantly sat on the chair in front of Doyoung's desk, muttering a hi.
“You wanted to talk to me? Is there any matter going on in the family that I need to be aware of?”
The logistics of their family never really appealed to Donghyuck; he let Doyoung take the lead, being older and smarter in those aspects. Donghyuck was also capable of bearing an intendant position, but it suited Doyoung too well, and Donghyuck already found his purpose in being Mark's bodyguard anyway.
“Our family still hasn't proposed anyone to represent us at the formal competition for Mark's marriage.”
Donghyuck tensed.
“That's surprising, you usually take care of everything on time.”
Doyoung sighed.
“Whose fault is this, huh?” the older said. “Donghyuck, we need to talk about this–”
But Donghyuck felt his heart clench, and he cut Doyoung.
“Why do you notice me so late about that, anyway? Mark's birthday is only in a few days, and the competition will begin soon after. People from all over the country, and most of all from our neighbours, are coming to the capital, and the castle will be full of people, it'll be insane. People are working on the festivities since months, and you wanna talk about it now?”
Doyoung looked at him, with his eyes piercing through his skin, and Donghyuck shivered.
“I thought you would come to me, or to anyone else of our house, to talk about the matter. I thought you'd be brave enough.”
“I am brave!” Donghyuck childishly replied, but even to his own ears, it sounded ridiculous. “But there's no reason for me to be involved in this, so I just– I just left the family doing whatever they want. I don't even care that much.”
Donghyuck sounded ridiculous and he knew it, but he was too afraid to acknowledge it. Of course he cared, they were talking about Mark's marriage, Mark's future half, future love. Something burned in Donghyuck's throat and he wanted to scream.
“Don't act like you didn't think of it a lot. I basically grew up as your older brother, do you really think you can hide anything from me?”
Donghyuck pinched his lips, not knowing what to respond. Through their bickering, Donghyuck knew how Doyoung cared for him, and he himself would do anything for him. Sometimes, he forgot how Doyoung could understand him way better than himself could.
“I simply don't think I fulfill the conditions to participate. I'm Mark's childhood friend, and also his bodyguard,” Donghyuck listened to himself blabbering things that he found ridiculous but that kept him remotely sane (that could prevent him from being too disappointed, if he disappointed himself first), “I'm already so close to him, that would be weird to ask for his hand, don't you think?”
Donghyuck kept something bigger deep down in himself.
“You tried to find yourself excuses. That's what I call self sabotage,” Doyoung commented.
“Don't act all clever on me.”
Donghyuck's frustration grew inside of him. He felt cornered, unable to move, yet his thoughts and questions were a furious stream that wouldn't leave him alone. It seemed to him like the competition which would be held in a few days was a tangled ball of wool that he was nothing but frustrated to see, but he couldn't look away, not able to pick it up to try to make it all better in fear of making it worse.
“Why would I even be allowed to participate in the competition?”
“That's a dumb question, Donghyuck. You're allowed to because you're part of a noble family, too.”
Donghyuck wanted to scream, to bite back, wanted to shove himself so close into Doyoung's face that he would have to squint to see him properly; to see that despite everything he said, Donghyuck's skin was still darker than his silky perfect white one.
Donghyuck was blessed by the sun and it had followed him inside the castle, inside the noble circle, always reminding him that he wasn't someone from the heart of the rich families that only knew how to be close to the royal power since so many generations.
“You obviously know that deep inside, I am not. I am adopted, Doyoung. My blood isn't the same as yours. There's a reason why only sons and daughters of noble families can claim the title of the Heir. And I am not one of those people.”
Donghyuck's words cut the air and he saw their effect on Doyoung with a painful accuracy; he thought it would make him feel better, to address the elephant in the room, to express what bothered him in his weakest moments, what scared him so much to the point he was ashamed.
But seeing how hurt Doyoung looked, how conflicted and upset, Donghyuck realized he felt even worse.
“After everything, after all those years, are we still those strangers from when you first arrived in the castle? When you couldn't understand that we decided and promised to take care of you as our own flesh and blood?”
Donghyuck realized he wasn't the only one hurt in this situation. While he was lamenting about how his darkest thoughts didn't allow him to find a true family in Doyoung's and his adoptive parents, Doyoung wondered where they all did wrong for Donghyuck not to feel like one of them, not to feel loved, to the point Donghyuck had to keep for himself something so heavy.
“I don't care what you think, Donghyuck, but you're part of our family. You fully belong, and with your status, you have your duties that you attend perfectly, as hard as they are. But you also have the rights that come with it. And one of them is to be eligible, like any other young person of a noble family, to represent your house and fight for Mark's hand in marriage.”
A pause.
“Donghyuck, I know how you can get in your head sometimes, and act like nothing touches you. So I'm here to remind you what's happening, and to ask you a simple question. Do you want to represent our house in the competition?”
Donghyuck's breath hitched.
It was like the stream he was trying to fight since so many weeks finally stopped, and welcomed him like a fresh calm river in summer (the one at the very back of Mark and Donghyuck's favourite park, where they spent so many lazy afternoons, splashing water at each other and tanning under the sun).
Maybe it wasn't so complicated anymore.
“I do,” he replied firmly, the most sure he had felt in months, “I volunteer as our house representant to defend Mark's honor and fight for his hand.”
Doyoung smiled.
“We'll have such interesting weeks coming up, Hyuck.”
▬▬ι═══════ﺤ -═══════ι▬▬
Mark was a little bit confused with how time decided to flow around him, lately. His days usually flowed at the same space – a little bit too slow when it was boring lessons, a little bit too fast when he was laughing with Donghyuck – and he took pride in how he never ran out of time for anything he'd planned. But these past weeks, it felt different.
He knew that when he was little, he waited for his birthday to arrive with trepidation, mainly because Donghyuck would finally stop teasing him by saying they were the same age and he had all the rights to talk informally to him for a few months (from June to the beginning of August). Donghyuck was always a little brat that took every opportunity to make fun of him in any situation.
That was one thing about Donghyuck he liked, between many others.
His best friend was one of a kind, that was obvious to everyone. And even if when they were younger, some people would only see Donghyuck as that loud adopted child from the Kim family, who looked so out of place with his tanned skin and his tendency to look out for trouble, what Mark noticed first about Donghyuck was the constellation of stars his pretty moles made on his chubby cheeks. It wasn't by chance that they were put together when they were little – Mark did play with children around his age, like any other, even if he was the direct heir of the kingdom – but it was fate that they took a liking into each other so fast and that, despite what seemed to separate them, they gravitated around each other to the point you couldn't see one without the other.
Donghyuck was good at that – always being next to Mark. He even made it his duty – Mark couldn't believe it at first, when Donghyuck said he'd be his official bodyguard, when he reached his seventeenth birthday.
(Donghyuck didn't know, but Mark had talked to his parents about the laws regarding the legal age of someone for protecting the royal family with their life, trying to postpone it. The first few weeks, he couldn't help but imagine catastrophe scenarios where Donghyuck would have to shield him and be badly injured. Seventeen was too young to mindlessly swear to protect him to death. Mark hated the idea at first, but nothing was really mindless with Donghyuck. Mark had learnt to accept it, and later even appreciated to have a reason to have his best friend by his side most parts of the day.)
And now, Mark's birthday was around the corner, and it felt like time stretched like chewing-gum. He was restless and it felt like he was drowning in a glass of syrup, something sticky and sweet, like a bee that got tricked. Mark was too confused to make perfect comparisons – he was confused yet he didn't show it.
There was one thing he wasn't confused about though. Like the way the formal competition would take place.
He was the main involved person, so of course he knew how it would go.
There were several tests that every suitor would have to take and pass if they wanted to have the chance to marry Mark.
(Mark didn't want to think so far – to think that everything that would take place, everything that everyone in the castle was talking about, from the maids to the advisors, was to find the perfect someone for Mark to love.
For the rest of his life.
He was about to be only twenty, damn it.)
And despite having reviewed every information existing in the castle about that competition, there was not a single notice about what thoughts he should think, what feelings he should feel.
It was his birthday soon, but he didn't feel the bubbling feeling of being allowed to be the center of attention of the day – Mark was always the center of attention. He was the country's heir, for fuck's sake. People gave him attention, if he wanted it or not. When he was still a child, it was easier to enjoy his birthdays, to forget the crushing responsibility.
And even last year, it had been fun – Donghyuck had made him sneak out at night to go swimming in the river under the full moon, and it had been so enthralling yet so simple, Mark remembered it with a fond smile.
Donghyuck probably wouldn't be able to do that this year. Donghyuck seemed a bit off, even. Mark would have liked to talk about it, but surprisingly, his own words and his own jumbled thoughts prevented him from doing so. And then he thought later would be okay, and then later became too late because now Mark was drowning under the preparation of the competition, and couldn't only care about his best friend but also had to take care of at least twenty unfamiliar suitors coming here to make his heart fall.
Mark didn't know if he wanted to fall for someone. He had a weird relationship with the idea of falling – blame Donghyuck and his dare, when they were children, to climb the highest tree of the garden. The Mark of that time realized that falling would break a bone or two of his. (He came back with his two feet on the ground without a scratch, but this fear of the possibility that he could have fallen.)
That morning, Mark woke up with the final list of his suitors given to him. He was still too groggy to understand it fully, barely out of bed, and he heard Jungwoo chuckling slightly when Mark put his head in his hands and sighed loudly. Jungwoo shouldn't be able to chuckle after a whole night of looking over him; he must be tired. At least it was almost time for Donghyuck to take over him. He had not seen him after he left his duty the afternoon before.
He put the list on his desk, and decided to first go freshen up and get ready before reading through the names. He already knew a few names on it, but he had to make sure he didn't forget anyone. He closed the bathroom door, and when he came back, Jungwoo was still here.
Donghyuck would knock at his door at any moment to begin work for the day now.
And Mark was right; when he was styling his mess of a hair in front of his mirror, some knocks were heard. It felt slightly off today (Mark could even recognize the specific sound of Donghyuck walking through the castle corridors and their wooden floor). Jungwoo went up to the door to open it, which was also weird because usually he didn't.
The face Mark could see in his mirror wasn't the one of his best friend, and he turned so quickly he almost fell on the floor, his eyes panicky and hands forming fists. He didn't know who was at his door and considering he was the heir of the kingdom, it was alarming to have a stranger so close to him in such an intimate place.
Why wasn't Jungwoo moving?
“Good morning, your Highness,” the lanky boy at his door greeted him with a deep bow. His voice was deep, too, surprisingly. Mark still wasn't convinced, his jaw clenching.
Jungwoo finally spoke up, “did we forget to update you on the situation?”
“Update? Situation? What situation?”
Where was Donghyuck?
“I'm here to replace Donghyuck, I'm your new bodyguard. I'm Jisung.”
Incredulity took over Mark's senses, and then, an irrational fear of what could have happened to Donghyuck for him to have the need to get a substitute. Donghyuck never missed his duty with Mark. Was he injured? Was there an important matter? Did he decide to leave? Did someone make him leave?
Jisung looked awkward, at the door, without Mark's invitation to go into his room.
“I'm sorry it's happening that way, it's not really professional,” Jungwoo sighed, “I know you should have been introduced to Jisung sooner, since he's your new bodyguard, but I promise you can trust him. Everything has kinda been rushed, since yesterday. After all, the big announcement is today, and Donghyuck complicated things a bit...”
Mark didn't get a thing Jungwoo was trying to explain.
“Where is Donghyuck?”
That was at least one thing his brain could focus on. If he knew where Donghyuck was then maybe things would be alright.
Jisung – apparently his new bodyguard? – looked helplessly at Jungwoo. First of all, rude–
“Mark, I just think you should go through the list of your suitors,” Jungwoo said instead of replying.
Mark didn't care about his suitors, he cared about Donghyuck and where the fuck he was, but apparently no one wanted to give him that information. Was it bad? Did Donghyuck betray them? Was he exiled?
“Don't get anxious on me, I don't have enough sleep in me to take care of that,” Jungwoo pressed him, getting the list for him and shoving it into his hands.
Mark looked through it, annoyed, just to please him and get to the important matter faster. Jaemin of the Na family, Renjun of the Huang family – who was not linked to Lucas nor Hendery, though they shared the same name –, Chittaphon Leechaiyapornkul – Mark didn't want to offense this one by butchering his name out loud, he still needed to learn the proper way to pronounce it –, Donghyuck from the Kim family, Yut–
Mark's heart stopped for a bit.
And then pounded through his ribcage faster than before.
“Why is there Donghyuck's name on my suitors' list?”
“What a dumb question,” (Mark heard Jisung snicker at Jungwoo's words, but was too dumbfounded to reprimand him for laughing at his expense), “he's got to be put on that list since he's also one of your suitors for the formal competition.”
“He's not my suitor, he's my bodyguard,” he's my best friend, Mark was lost.
“Yeah, regarding that bodyguard part, obviously since he has to compete like everybody else, he's been exempt of his duty, and that's why Jisung is here to take his job.”
Mark couldn't believe it. His brain was too full of new information that involved Donghyuck and Donghyuck wasn't even there by his side.
So to Donghyuck's side he decided to go.
“Mark! Oh my god don't run!”
Mark bolted out of his room, startling Jisung and even Jungwoo, and ran through the corridors to reach the close aisle where Donghyuck's own bedroom was, where he hoped he'd find him.
Mark knew the way like his own heart – although his heart was bewildered – and it didn't take long until he was in front of the familiar dark and embossed door. He didn't knock, and opened it in a frenzy, hoping to have a glimpse of his best friend as soon as possible.
Donghyuck was standing in front of his wardrobe, and the sudden intrusion made him gasp and turn toward the entrance. The door closed loudly behind Mark who was now frozen, breathing loudly after the marathon he had, his eyes on Donghyuck's shocked face. His eyes went from alert to confused, a little pout taking place on his plump lips.
Mark's own eyes were still wide open, his eyebrows high on his forehead, and if he cared he'd try to relax his expression because for sure Donghyuck would make fun of him.
“Hyuck...,” he finally said, unsure.
Donghyuck still wasn't saying anything, and that's when Mark registered that he was in the middle of getting dressed; before Mark arrived like a tornado, he'd been calmly looking at his reflexion in the big mirror adjacent to his dresser.
He had straight black pants, but what caught Mark's attention was the white shirt barely put on his shoulders. It was a loose shirt, with puffed sleeves that tightened at Donghyuck's wrist then ended in evased cuffs. Donghyuck didn't have time to adjust it and do the intricate laces that adorned the piece instead of simple buttons.
Mark didn't remember this shirt. It was delicate, but probably too complicated and not practical enough for Donghyuck to wear it during his bodyguard duty. It was pretty, though. Mark liked the contrast of the white on Donghyuck's tanned skin – Donghyuck still could have a hard time about this detail, but Mark wasn't having it. The opened shirt flowed on Donghyuck's toned torso.
Mark felt a little embarrassed blush at the top of his cheeks; he's seen Donghyuck without a shirt plenty of times, when they went around swimming, but it wasn't the same as seeing him in the middle of dressing up for the day (Mark wasn't supposed to see this).
“What are you doing here without your assigned bodyguard? Where is Jungwoo?” Donghyuck scowled.
Mark took a step toward him, and to keep his mind focused on something – to calm down now that he knew where Donghyuck was (in front of him, which was the best place, to be honest) – he raised his hands and fiddled with the collar of Donghyuck's shirt to take care of the laces for him. His eyes were resolutely casted on the fabric and nothing else.
“My assigned bodyguard is you,” he replied, pulling on one end of the string to make it even.
“Mark,” Donghyuck's voice sounded a little bit unsure, a little bit guilty. That wouldn't do.
Mark thought back on the list he'd read a few minutes before. The suitor list with Donghyuck's name on it. The lace on Donghyuck's shirt was a complicated trick to get done but it felt less difficult to solve than what Donghyuck seemed to want to tell him.
“Didn't you get the notice? Didn't you meet your new bodyguard? It's supposed to be his shift now – if he's late on the first day, I'll be sure to find someone else more suitable, it wouldn't do, your safety is primordial–”
“Hyuck, stop talking like Jungwoo. Why wasn't it you who came to take your shift earlier? I, I don't understand fully.”
Mark felt that it was a bit ridiculous, to be in front of Donghyuck and helping him fastening his shirt, while he couldn't understand the fact that Donghyuck's name was on that damned suitor list, and Donghyuck would only talk about the supposed bodyguard who took his duty.
Mark was almost done with the shirt. He was surprised he wasn't trembling, despite the restless state and slightly angry one he was in. Donghyuck looked good in that shirt, at least there was that. There was only the last knot to do, the two little bunny ears. Donghyuck put his hands on Mark's and lowered them.
“Mark, let's sit and talk.”
Donghyuck let out a sigh when he sat on the edge of his bed, and Mark went next to him, anticipation in his eyes.
“I went to see Doyoung yesterday,” Donghyuck began, fiddling with his sleeves to occupy his hands, “and he told me our family didn't have anyone to represent us for the formal competition for,” he coughed, embarrassed, “for your marriage. So I volunteered.”
“So your name on my suitors' list isn't a joke.”
“Of course it isn't. I wouldn't joke about this, you know it.”
“W-why did you volunteer?”
Donghyuck had this deer caught in the headlights kind of expression for a millisecond.
“If people are gonna compete to get your hand, I need to be here to be certain they are good enough. Not everyone deserve you.”
“So you're participating for–”
“For defending your honor. This competition is important for you and as your best friend, I need to be sure it's going smoothly.”
Donghyuck didn't look at him during his explanation, but then he looked a bit more sure of himself, and raised his head to meet Mark's eyes, and he smiled softly.
“It's gonna be alright, okay? I wanted to help you, and you wouldn't let me before, not even asking me a question or two if you had doubts. So now I'm here. At least one familiar name in the list can be a little bit soothing, don't you think?”
Mark recognized that, after the initial shock, knowing that Donghyuck would partake in this felt reassuring.
“And I can't continue my usual duty as your bodyguard in the meantime, though, obviously. I know it sucks, but the guy who's replacing me – Jisung, did you meet him already? – I trust him, and he's funny and cute to tease, so you'll be fine, I promise.”
Mark nodded. Jungwoo basically told him the same, but when it came from Donghyuck, it was easier to accept it.
“Now let's not make a big deal out of it. You have so many things to take care of, so don't bother about me, ok? Today, the competition will be officially announced, and the guests are all arriving tomorrow. I need to take care of some things too with Doyoung today, so I'll see you later?”
“Alright. Don't overwork yourself.”
Donghyuck scoffed, “I should be the one telling you that. Now go back to where you left this poor Jisung, you're lucky I'm not telling your parents you left your bodyguard's side.”
They chuckled together, and Mark left the room to go back to his own.
(It was alright. He just had to act like Hyuck, and ignore the fact that since Hyuck participated to the competition too, that meant now he was his potential spouse, too.)
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Since Donghyuck accepted to represent his family for the formal competition, the days went by fast. One moment he was discussing the several tests the suitors had to go through with Doyoung, another he attended his daily training with Johnny – who looked at him with a smirk as if he knew something Donghyuck didn't – and then the King and the Queen released the official announcement of the competition deciding who Mark's future lover would be.
The announcement was a formality, and wasn't a surprise for anyone around the country – even less inside the population of the castle. Donghyuck had seen everyone working on preparing the festivities, because you didn't welcome around twenty suitors and their close relatives and aggregation with a finger snap. It was a logistic that Donghyuck was glad he didn't really have to go through since he already lived inside the palace.
That was actually something that he was guilty about, but he'd never tell Doyoung about this. He remembered how Doyoung had reminded him that he had all the rights to compete as well, and Donghyuck tried to convince his brain that there was nothing wrong with it. Living with Mark since his early childhood, growing up with him and knowing his likes and dislikes, that was something the other suitors didn't share with Mark. But the suitors shared a big family name, a country of their own, wealth and multiple talents that Donghyuck had no clue about. The Kim family was close to the King and the Queen, but Donghyuck didn't think he himself would be any good marriage party for Mark.
Anyway, why was he thinking about that? He only volunteered because no one else did, and he had Mark's security and well being in mind. He could still see, with pride, the relief that arbored Mark's frowning face when he had told him that maybe his name in the list of the suitors would soothe him a little bit. Even if Donghyuck couldn't be Mark's final choice, at least he'd be there to filter more easily those who truly deserved Mark. He would be horrified if he ended up with someone who was far away from being perfect. Mark deserved someone strong, who would listen to his worries and understand his weird humor, who would always put him first and try to protect him, who would appreciate his smiles and not make fun of his questionable obsessions.
Donghyuck was adamant on this.
At least knowing everything he needed to know about Mark already was an advantage, because while the other suitors would try to strike conversations with Mark, Donghyuck could analyze everyone in the meantime and see who wasn't a good fit for Mark. Not that he didn't trust Mark's opinion. There was just maybe the possibility that the suitors only showed one part of themselves – the good part only, the one for show – and when Mark wasn't there, would act radically different. Donghyuck didn't have to play a role in front of Mark. He didn't even have to seduce him. They were best friends, right?
How could the kingdom still keep a tradition like this one, though? Donghyuck still wondered, but the King and the Queen married because of the exact same tradition, and their couple was a sweet and powerful one, so it shouldn't be that bad. Maybe it only made Donghyuck a little bit uncertain because the main protagonist of it all was his best friend. At least, Mark had choices, he had the final decision.
Donghyuck hadn't planned to think of all this, but really, it had been a long day not yet over – Mark's birthday. Unlike the other years, this one didn't feel as intimate. It never was really intimate, with all the officials wishing Mark a happy birthday, a successful life and great health, but at least Donghyuck could kidnap him and hold their own special best friends celebration. Now, they couldn't, because the castle was busy with all the guests, and Mark finally being twenty was a big deal for way more people. And since Donghyuck wasn't on bodyguard duty anymore, he couldn't even have a reason to be by Mark's side. As in, closer to him. Now, he was a suitor like the others, so he didn't have a special treatment. They needed to be fair. Donghyuck already had a few advantages – but it didn't matter in the end, because Mark wouldn't choose him. He was only there to defend Mark's honor.
Focus, Donghyuck.
The official arrival of all the suitors was on Mark's birthday, and the castle had planned to celebrate Mark's birthday with a dinner that would also be a welcoming festivity. It was the first time Mark met his suitors and it was an occasion to mingle and talk and create links that would last for the next weeks through the whole competition.
Donghyuck was sipping his glass of sparkling alcohol, looking at Mark across the big ballroom. It was his habit, since he was his bodyguard, to always have an eye on him. Jeno was by his side for tonight, serious and handsome with a neutral face, a few steps near Mark, to give him some semblance of intimacy when he was conversing with each guest. Jeno had become a friend of Mark, too, so at least they weren't awkward around each others.
Donghyuck looked at the illuminations reflected in the big mirrors, the French windows on one side, opened to let the eyes wander toward the flourished gardens and let a summer breeze pass. Big tables with enough food for everyone were disseminated in the ballroom, to ease everyone to go from one to another and create a social dance to go talk to a group or another, mingle and chit chat, as the rich people were fond of doing and mastered pretty early. Donghyuck was one of them, too, but sometimes he didn't like the forced smiles of some people. He was the sun of the castle, but also the honest child, and his words could go beyond some ancestral social norms. Mark found it hilarious; Doyoung, not so much.
Mark was in a conversation with two of his suitors, and if Donghyuck had to describe them with cliché words, they truly looked like the embodiment of princes – which they were. They were taller than Mark, but seemed gentle and had bright smiles. One of them had slightly wavy black hair that prettily fell on his forehead, while the other had big round eyes that sparkled at something Mark just said, and then he laughed. Mark seemed happy.
“That's Prince Lucas, and Prince Hendery. Both Huangs, but not from the same country,” someone said just next to him.
Donghyuck startled, and turned to be face to face with a pretty guy with a slim face, sharp jawline and amusement in his eyes which matched his bright smile showing pearly straight teeth. His deep blue hair contrasted with his fairly pale skin, and Donghyuck couldn't help but feel a pinch of sadness.
He didn't know he'd be so affected to be surrounded by such perfect people. Maybe what hurt more was to see closely what he wasn't and see Mark faraway from him at the same time. He had not realized that until then the both of them had their own little world inside the palace.
“I'm Prince Jaemin, nice to meet you. And this is Prince Renjun. The third Huang, yet not related to the others,” he added while gesturing to the other guy next to him, petite and perfect in his deep ocean suit lined with gold. Prince Renjun bowed his head, a faint smile on his lips.
“Nice to meet you, I'm Donghyuck.”
There wasn't any prince to put in front of his name.
“From the Kim family, right?” Jaemin commented, not losing his smile, not losing anything of his cheerful demeanour.
“That's right.”
“Prince Mark is handsome tonight,” Renjun said absentmindedly.
Donghyuck was about to send him a dark stare, but then he realized it was normal Renjun would say this kind of thing. Mark was handsome. And Renjun was a suitor; there was a brooch of sweet williams pinned on his chest above his heart, just like every suitor in the room, him included.
“He's a delight to talk with. He gets flustered easily,” Jaemin added with a chuckle.
Donghyuck's head spinned a little.
Yeah, Mark was fun to tease, because his reactions were always cute. Usually, Donghyuck was the only one who could get out with it.
Why was he so surprised that the suitors were trying to get close to Mark and flirt with him? It's what was expected from them. He should be happy for his best friend. So many attention from so many handsome people; Mark was a romantic at heart.
A loud laugh distracted him; he could recognize this laugh between a thousand, because he heard it on a daily basis, and once again he looked out for Mark. In the little time he'd talked with Jaemin and Renjun, Mark had gone to another little group of people. Donghyuck could see the same sweet williams on their suits. If at least they made Mark laugh, it was a good point.
“Princes Yuta and Chittaphon,” Jaemin provided the information without needing to be asked, “they are best friends, quite the duo.”
Donghyuck wondered just how many princes were suitors for Mark; plus those two were best friends. Mark and he were best friends too, but Mark was the heir of this powerful kingdom while Donghyuck was his bodyguard.
Doyoung told you that you have all the right to compete as well. He'd hit your neck hard if he ever heard you doubting and comparing yourself.
There wasn't anything good in being this gloomy. Donghyuck didn't even know why the more he learnt about everyone, the more he felt pressured. He only needed to be attentive, and be sure Mark would go through the whole competition with a calm mind. There was no place for a little jealousy to see his best friend being occupied with so many other people that wanted to charm him.
He wasn't really expecting the suitors to be that interested in talking with him, but Jaemin and Renjun made it really easy for him to fall into a conversation. It was the whole point of the party, after all. But Mark had not come to Donghyuck yet to exchange trivialities; it wasn't surprising, as he already knew everything about him, unlike the other suitors that he only knew through diplomacy meetings for the most part.
At some point, the duo that Jaemin had talked about reached their little circle, like a rehearsed traditional dance. Donghyuck recognized the harmless mischief sparkling in their eyes, the one that came out of curiosity – he had the same, usually. They greeted everyone and introduced themselves, Prince Ten directly telling them that he prefered this nickname instead of Chittaphon, and Donghyuck was actually glad he wouldn't offense him if he had pronounced it in a wrong way.
“It is the first time I come to your beautiful country, but it is not the first time I meet Prince Mark's family. The King and Mark's cousin came last year for a diplomatic mission – Johnny, am I right?” Ten smoothly asked, tilting his head toward Johnny's figure a few groups away from them.
In the middle of all the unfamiliar faces that Donghyuck met, there was fortunately Johnny, towering over almost everyone, a tall figure that was like a lighthouse for Donghyuck, bringing him comfort by his presence alone. As if he sensed someone was talking about him, he came to greet them. Donghyuck didn't miss the mutual recognition that passed on Johnny's face when he looked at Prince Ten, and the both of them exchanged a few comments on Johnny's stay the previous year.
Johnny lingered because he could sense that Donghyuck needed it. He maybe was a master weapon, but he also was an older brother figure to him, just like Doyoung.
“So many handsome suitors from all around the neighbour countries,” Ten sighed with a conversational tone, leading their exchange with easiness. “But still some people from the vicinity of the King and the Queen here,” he added, looking especially at Donghyuck. “I heard you're actually taking the duty of protecting Prince Mark?”
Donghyuck nodded and barely stiffened. He did have this conversation with Doyoung, how he could address the matter if anyone asked him. It was time to be proud of himself.
“I'm sharing this duty with two other bodyguards on a daily basis. However, since I accepted to represent my family in this formal competition for Prince Mark's hand in marriage, I've obviously been exempt of working in the meantime.”
“That's understandable, I'm myself taking care of foreign diplomacy matters in normal time, but that has been put on hold,” Renjun commented, “my cousin Chenle is helping instead of me right now, but I'm actually a bit worried since this rascal is surprisingly cheeky.”
That made all of them chuckle.
It didn't feel like they were actually all competing against each other. They didn't talk about the different trials that were planned, and instead enjoyed the company for the night. The mood was light, once Donghyuck let himself relax. The King and the Queen, and most of all the employees of the palace, had organized a sumptuous party for Mark's birthday.
The rest of the evening passed in a blur for Donghyuck; there were speeches, there was Mark's gigantic birthday cake, there were the congratulations and the exchanged smiles. At some point, Jaemin dragged him to wish Mark a happy birthday personally, and Donghyuck greeted Jeno as well, still on duty, who looked at Jaemin with a careful stare.
It was only the first evening of a long series of gatherings, dinners and trials, all for Mark's beautiful eyes – hm, all for Mark's hand in marriage.
But for Donghyuck it would be like before; a time where he needed to protect Mark and defend his honor, the only difference being that he was doing that now as his suitor and not as his bodyguard.
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The summer breeze tickled Donghyuck's cheek, and he sighed in contentment, leaned on his open window. The moon was shining on the back garden he could see from his room. Everything was so calm, so still except the leaves on the trees.
It was past midnight, which meant Mark's birthday was over, but the festivities had barely begun. When the sun rose, the castle would once again be as busy as a beehive. In the meantime, Donghyuck relished the silence. The party earlier had been a lot too handle, more than he had expected.
He had barely been able to talk with Mark. It bitterly reminded him that the past few months, it had often felt that way – because he himself was too full of his own thoughts, and Mark was working so much he didn't want to bother him. He didn't know why he reacted this way. He missed him, and it's not like he couldn't be in his presence.
He took a deep breath and then exited his bedroom silently, his baggy pyjama way more comfortable than his fitting suit. He went down to the kitchen and came back with a little surprise. He didn't make the turn to the corridor to his room, but tiptoed to another well known bedroom. He knocked on the door, the special way he always did, and he heard light footsteps until the door opened slightly, revealing Mark's face.
“Hyuck...,” he murmured, obviously a bit tired but also very happy to see his best friend. He opened the door wider, and Donghyuck saw Jungwoo on his camp bed; the older wasn't even surprised to see him at this hour.
“Can I borrow you?” Donghyuck asked with a teasing tone.
Mark laughed, and his eyes crinkled. He also was in his sleepwear, an expensive silk one, but he looked soft, relaxed, far from the Mark of a few hours ago who stood straight and confident in front of all the guests.
Jungwoo shushed them out, knowing that in Donghyuck's presence, Mark was safe. Donghyuck was glad about that.
The two best friends rushed through the corridors as silently as they could, and ended up in the usual corner of the garden they liked, not going too far from the palace. It was only them and the silent outdoor, which surprisingly removed an unknown weight from Donghyuck's shoulder. Now, it finally felt right, sitting next to Mark in the grass, with enough natural light to distinguish Mark's serene facial features.
Donghyuck was happy. He wanted his time with Mark to always feel this easy; to knock at Mark's door and he would follow him without a question, because he trusted him and sought out his presence.
“It's past midnight already, but... Happy birthday, Markie,” Donghyuck teased him, and while Mark half-whined and half-thanked him, he unveiled the treasure he'd got in the kitchen for Mark.
Instantly, Mark's eyes sparkled at the view of what was in Donghyuck's hands; it was simple watermelon slices, but Donghyuck knew that they were Mark's favourite. He had been bitter not to see any at the party, replaced by expensive sugary verrines that had been good but not perfect like watermelons.
“Oh my god, Hyuck, you're a saint. This is ten times better than the birthday cake we got at the party!” And without waiting, forgetting that he was the heir of the kingdom and that he had manners to maintain, he picked a fruit slice with a wide smile and took a big juicy bite.
Donghyuck felt like he had offered him the whole world on a silver plate. That was ridiculous, it was only some watermelon.
“Did you enjoy your birthday?” Donghyuck murmured, looking at the night sky while Mark ate.
He thought of the previous years, of the official dinners that weren't that much of a burden because they could also have time for themselves and enjoy the day outside, just the two of them. And he thought of now, how he forgot about the party and the stolen time away from Mark now that he was with him, in the intimacy of the night, the most relaxed he'd been in days.
“I didn't really realize it was my birthday, with all the stuff I had to take care of,” Mark pouted.
“It's the first year you get like twenty handsome suitors to fight for your hand as a present, though, you should feel honored,” Donghyuck tried to joke around.
“As much as I know it's tradition, it doesn't really feel genuine, but what can we do, right... I actually was so nervous this evening, I hope I made a good impression.”
“Are you kidding me? Your suitors are supposed to feel like it, not you. Everyone wants to impress you.”
“What about you?”
“If I want to impress you?” Donghyuck repeated, puzzled.
Mark blushed.
“No, I want to know how you felt during the party. I didn't have any opportunity to talk more to you, I'm sorry. I did that with all my suitors, and you're one as well, so I should treat you the same,” he explained, determination in his eyes.
Donghyuck's heart fluttered, not sure why. Mark really considered him like the others, which was flattering, but at the same time, it felt like he lost his best friend status in all this. It was this in between, this uncertainty, that Donghyuck mulled over. If only Mark could have stayed nineteen forever...
“I talked with your other suitors, mostly Prince Jaemin and Prince Renjun. They all come from rich countries, it'll be great whoever you choose to marry.”
Mark didn't seem satisfied with his reply.
“Why do you always talk about my suitors?”
Donghyuck was at a loss of words for this question.
They stayed silent, until Mark spoke again.
“I'm a bit scared,” he whispered, hugging his legs against his torso, avoiding Donghyuck's eyes.
That broke something inside of Donghyuck, and he felt ashamed, that Mark didn't open up about this sooner. Slowly, he came closer, and bumped his shoulder with Mark's.
“We'll face it together day by day, okay?” he murmured, his voice constricted in his throat.
What else should he say to soothe Mark? And maybe the answer to that was: nothing, just be there, to be open and listen to Mark's worries. He put his arm around Mark's shoulder, and drew him against his chest to bring him comfort. Mark opened his arms and didn't wait to cuddle closer, hiding his face against Donghyuck's neck.
The late night, the soft light of the moon, the wind as the only disturb of the silence around them and Mark's slightly stressed breathing; Donghyuck took it all in.
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The first time Donghyuck learnt about the trials that composed the formal competition for the heir's future spouse, he was eleven. At that age, it didn't really occur to him that this was all about Mark. It's not like he didn't know, but it didn't match with his reality – eleven-year-old Mark sitting next to him in the old library with their teacher, learning just like him about the world and the tradition in their country.
It'd been eight years Donghyuck knew the first trial of the competition was always, always, to offer a present to the heir. It was logical, because it was linked to the heir's birthday, and like any other common tradition, a birthday asked for presents.
Donghyuck had no idea what to get Mark. He never even thought he would participate in this competition, when he studied about it. Everything had happened so fast, and now the first trial was around the corner and Donghyuck didn't have a present.
Everything he could think of seemed off; the previous years, he would always find something silly or questionable, to make Mark laugh and make him slightly flustered, without being crude – they were teenagers, they weren't that delicate all the time. But now, Mark was twenty and all the weight of the kingdom was being added to his shoulder bit by bit. There were other suitors that could offer Mark beautiful and luxurious islands, rivers of gemstones, rare books or even VIP access to whatever celebrity shows Mark might be into – there was this singer he was a fan of...
And Donghyuck, with his family's power and wealth, could obtain the same things. Doyoung did talk about it with him, presenting him possible acquisitions he could take care of under their family name – there was a budget allocated to him now, that Donghyuck couldn't help but find weird because it was like he took money from a purse that had the name “money to spend to make Mark fall for you as a suitor and future spouse”.
The last decision was Donghyuck's to make. If he wanted to stay in the “game” long enough to be sure to protect Mark's well being, he needed to pass the trial and not rush it, because he wasn't a privileged suitor; he needed to compete in all fairness.
The first trial was the next day, and Donghyuck had nothing. Doyoung was urging his ass to find something, but in the palace, looking at all the propositions neatly listed, the pictures of what could bring more wealth and a smile to Mark, nothing appealed to Donghyuck, nothing made him think it was a good enough present for Mark.
So he tried another technique, and ditched Doyoung who was slightly becoming pissed at him.
Donghyuck took Jeno with him – Jisung was the one on duty – and they went out the castle gate to enter the cacophony of one of the city's biggest mall. If Donghyuck could see and touch and have a tangible idea of Mark's present, maybe he'd be able to make a decision.
It was hot outside but the conditioned air inside the mall was a relief that they could worship easily. The building was full of people doing their own shopping – there were teenagers taking care of their part-time job as retailers, while family were out with children running around in sandals and little hats. Each shop window advertised anything and everything. If Donghyuck wasn't so stressed about Mark's present, he'd use the opportunity to do his own shopping.
Jeno was nonchalant beside him, sipping on his milk tea boba that he'd whined to get the exact second they entered the mall. Donghyuck faked to be annoyed by it, but he enjoyed his sweet drink too.
If you ignored the reason they were here, they looked like two students enjoying their free time on an usual summer day. They were everything but normal students, working for the royal family instead.
“A shirt?” Jeno gestured toward an expensive brand shop with their new collection displayed behind the glass windows. A security guard was at the entrance, for sure asked to filter the kind of clients who could enter. Donghyuck looked underdressed, with his jeans that he didn't wear on duty, but his credit card wasn't cheap. However, he frowned a bit displeased at Jeno's proposition.
“Mark already got some exclusive clothes from their next collection.”
Jeno rolled his eyes, whispering that's what being the heir feels like, huh, looking around again for another idea. Donghyuck knew there was no malice in his words; just the realization that, indeed, finding a birthday present for Mark happened to be way more complicated than normal.
What did you gift the heir of the kingdom?
They were no strangers of the luxury brands, of the leather bags, silver jewelries and (probably ugly) leopard print shoes. Eyeing the logo of a travel agency, Donghyuck got the idea of offering Mark some holidays at the other end of the globe – and then he realized that Mark would only be able to take those holidays after the competition, and at that time he'd have his fiancé with him, so Donghyuck should plan the holidays for two, but it gave him an unpleasant feeling to do it if it was for Mark and his significant other, whoever that might be. It felt weird. Wrong. Actually, Donghyuck didn't think that was a good idea at all, really.
Back to square one.
“So frustrating. Mark could get anything in a heartbeat. Each one of his suitors could. How to make it special, really?” Donghyuck sighed. “And it needs to stand out enough since the presents are nameless.”
Donghyuck tried to picture the scene: all the suitors patiently waiting, looking at Mark in front of a table full of presents, but no chance to know exactly who gifted what. There would be delicate jewelry boxes, extravagant contracts printed on glazed papers, latest tawdry technology. Exactly what was on the list Doyoung had showed him for some inspiration.
It didn't inspire him, because it wasn't presents for Mark, it was presents for the heir.
What did you gift Mark?
What did you gift your best friend, that you've spent almost fifteen years of your life with?
Donghyuck suddenly got an epiphany. He squealed and surprised Jeno to the point the poor guy almost choked on a boba pearl.
“I know what to get, Jeno! Let's go!”
Jeno was still coughing when Donghyuck pulled him in a hurry faraway from the luxury shops floor.
▬▬ι═══════ﺤ -═══════ι▬▬
Mark wondered if saying he wanted to faint right at that moment would be too dramatic and make Jeno laugh.
Probably. There wasn't anything scary waiting for him behind the door he was about to open, if you did consider twenty-some suitors patiently waiting for him completely usual. Mark couldn't get his mind around this idea; so many people here just for him.
“Please, don't forget to breathe,” Jeno whispered next to him with a tilt of amusement in his voice that Mark could clearly decipher. Of course he found the situation funny. He wasn't the one having to stand still and proud in front of a crew holding his future spouse.
Mark should be used by this – to always have to be confident looking, to have the situation under control – but it felt different than a diplomacy meeting next to his father with another high ranked person. His suitors were all around his age, and even if they were from noble families and that signing a marriage contract with one of them could be like signing a business contract, it felt more to Mark than that: they were in the middle of a competition for his other half. And having to make decision on who to keep by his side was actually way more harder than some politic moves.
His parents had told him not to take into account the background of each one of his suitors – they were all enough since they've been considered as suitors in the first place – and all Mark had to do was to see them as people. With their personalities, their flaws, their behaviours. To see what he liked in them, if they were at ease together and if Mark could project himself in a relationship.
(Mark kept the idea in the back of his mind, if he could maybe change the tradition once he would be on the throne. It was a tiny little seed, that wouldn't change his actual situation, because he knew he would go through the whole process of the competition until the end, and come back with a fiancé. But, who knew, for the next generation, maybe...)
“You know what is Donghyuck's present, right?” Mark asked Jeno.
His bodyguard just showed him his usual eye smile instead of a reply.
“A certain someone reminded me that this trial is supposed to stay nameless, so no, Prince Mark, I won't spill the beans.”
Mark huffed, but he had to regain his composure quickly because an employee opened the door, which meant Mark could enter the room prepared to hold the first test, the one for his presents.
Receiving presents shouldn't feel that pressuring.
He entered the room, and at least he saw that nothing was making him feel like he was trapped inside. They had chosen to hold the first trial in a big room similar to the ballroom from his birthday party – the palace was full of all kind of places and it was easy to find the perfect one – in the sense that there were big french windows all along one side, some of them open to let the fresh air come in. There were marquetry, little coffee tables surrounded by armchairs, even a piano in a corner. Maybe Mark lived in the palace, but he rediscovered some rooms pretty often.
The trial wasn't as formal as Mark thought it would be: instead of all his suitors standing still on one side of the room and looking at him with attention, all of them were scattered around the lounge, some standing, some sitting, conversing between them. It was casual and felt less like Mark was going to have an actual test. Of course, when he entered, all of the suitors stood up and bowed toward him in a sign of respect, and he tilted his head in return to greet them. It was a weird dance that was taking place; the intendant in charge of the trial manoeuvred him toward the large table in the middle of the room, where layed all of the presents he had to choose from.
Such an unusual birthday party. It wasn't his birthday day, the presents weren't all wrapped, and no one to hand them to him – he just had to lift his hand to grab whatever gift he wanted to look at closer. While every single suitor looked at him from the corner of their eyes. Would they even be able to conceal their thoughts, if Mark actually paid attention to their presents?
A reason why each gift was nameless was that a present should mean more than the person it comes from; in their case, everyone could afford extravagant things, but Mark needed to choose what struck him as personal, original, what he actually liked, even if he didn't know who was behind, not to be biased. The other trials were full of that – actually talking and being subject to the charms of his suitors – so there was this first objective test to balance the others.
Mark tried to remember the theory behind all this, but his brain was a bit mushy, and he had a hard time remembering technical matters. What mattered at the moment was that he had to choose presents, and the ones he'd neglect represented the first suitors to leave the competition. Mark felt awkward at the idea – it had only been a few days he'd met everyone – but he knew that at the end, there could only be one person.
He met Donghyuck's eyes while walking to the table crumbling under presents.
What did Donghyuck get him? What if he actually ignore Donghyuck's present, and he would be out of the competition so early? (Why would he care so much, anyway? It was all in fairness, right?)
Mark took a look at every present displayed. He knew that lots of them couldn't even fit on the table, because – he grabbed a framed glossy paper – for example, this one present was apparently a preserved forest at his name, and that couldn't be brought up to the palace. A good point, though, a meaningful present that didn't only consider Mark's liking toward nature, but actually helped beyond Mark's birthday to make a good action. Whoever thought of it had a point already.
The scene was calm, but not silent, and it soothed Mark's nerves a bit. He could hear the nature outside, the little conversations between his suitors trying hard to act like they didn't care of his whereabouts, the soft music coming from somewhere.
The intendant conversed with him while he was looking through everything, opened the little jewelry boxes, read the numerous letters containing reservations to idyllic places or fancy activities. Everything was nice, but it wasn't always something he actually loved. He went meticulously through the gifts, making mental notes about the ones he for sure liked, to give his final choice later.
A particularly big box wrapped in an obnoxious sparkly paper and a big red bow was the next present Mark had to open. He felt Jeno's amused eyes on him when he took the lid to open the gift, and after a few seconds of astonishment, a laugh escaped his lips because he couldn't prevent it.
That was the brightest reaction he showed since the beginning, and obviously the most favorable one. Mark's eyes sparkled, and he showed Jeno the inside of the box; the bodyguard snorted, but nodded to approve the choice.
As unusual as it seemed, the present was an actual watermelon. A perfectly rounded, with deep green ridges and softer ones, ripped watermelon. There was a little note next to it that explained the richness of this variety and the certain and certified magnificent sweetness and perfect taste he would encounter once he took a slice of it. Mark loved it.
He let out a last light chuckle, putting the note back inside the box. Before he opened the last present, he glanced at the suitors, looking for Donghyuck; his best friend was actually looking at him too, but he smiled sheepishly at him before looking somewhere else. Mark wondered if that had been his gift. Donghyuck knew his love for watermelon, and had also given him some right after the official party the other day.
The last box was significantly smaller. It was also lighter. It was wrapped in a soft blue paper, and Mark opened it carefully. What he got in his hand was, just like the watermelon, a present really different from all the fancy ones he got until then. It was a shiny black pot, with a little sachet inside of it, on which he could read maple tree seed. Instructions on the back were listed, so he'd know how to take care of it. A handwritten note was the last thing inside the box, and Mark carefully read it.
“Maple tree symbolizes strength, endurance and tolerance; its leaves become a beautiful red during autumn. I hope you will take care of this seed so it will grow into a beautiful tree in a few years. Even if it takes time, the journey can be a soothing part of your life. And one day, this maple tree will be strong enough to carry adventurous kids that want to touch the sky or want to challenge their best friend.”
A wave of nostalgia and fondness washed through Mark.
He saw himself, so young, so reckless, a bit stubborn and definitely up to any challenge Donghyuck had for him, climbing that old tree in the garden. Who planted it there? He had no idea. He just knew that he grew attached to it, somehow, because of a silly afternoon dare. Everytime Mark saw it, it would bring him this sensation of being tangible, like an anchor in the rapid stream that were his everyday duties. It was comforting and definitely one of Mark's soft spots.
There was no doubt this present was from Donghyuck. It was different from the others, because Donghyuck was his best friend, and knew him better than any other suitor. The trial was supposed to be nameless – and nowhere had Donghyuck written his name – but it was obvious that the present was filled with something more than wealth and this desperation to please Mark. Mark had never thought he wanted to take care of a young sprout, but now the idea made a little happiness and expectation simmer in his chest.
He would take care of this maple tree in the making, for sure.
When he delicately put the black pot back on the table, the intendant asked him:
“Have you made your choice, your Highness?”
Mark looked one last time at all the presents, then nodded, a bit fidgety yet confident.
▬▬ι═══════ﺤ -═══════ι▬▬
The morning sun was kind on Donghyuck's skin, while he was trying to regain his breath after a training against Jeno. The both of them were laid on the dusty ground, a field they used sometimes when they didn't want to be confined in the training room. August was hot but they chose to train in the morning, using the shades and the fact that it wasn't unbearable yet to be under the cloudless blue sky.
“You improved,” Donghyuck commented between two gulps of fresh air.
“You still beat me,” Jeno replied.
At this point, their skills were developed enough and they only worked on the details that would make their competences that more stronger and acute, all for the sake of protecting Mark in every possible situation. When they took the job, they were already at the top of their capacities, because Mark deserved the best. To keep training every week was so they wouldn't lose their stamina and reflexes – it was their job to be fit, after all. While Jeno hit the gym more often than not when he wasn't on duty, Donghyuck was more used to running to stay in shape, in addition to what Johnny instructed them during their sessions.
“Well, I'm the best one out of all of Mark's bodyguards, aren't I?”
“What, you're the best one and you're Mark's favourite as well? I call some injustice.”
“Hard work with a little bit of help from my best friend privileges.”
That part of the palace, outside, was soothing. There wasn't anyone walking around, not any lost guest or group of people whispering about the ongoing competition. It was a relief for Donghyuck, who after the end of the first trial, had felt like he needed to wind down. It was a few days later, and the opportunity to join Jeno and Jisung's training had been a good way for him to clear his mind for a little bit. He stressed more about the competition than he thought, and he was scared it would mess up with his work and appearance.
“What's the next trial again?” Jeno asked, turning his head to look at Donghyuck, squishing his cheek against his shoulder.
“A dinner.”
“That's it? You all gonna have a nice dinner with Mark, eating your weight in food, and then Mark will eliminate some of you, just because he didn't like the fact that someone put ketchup on their fries?”
Donghyuck snorted. It actually could be funny – Mark hated ketchup with a passion, and the few times Donghyuck had managed to sneak out of the palace with him to enjoy cheap greasy food in a fast food chain, he'd always given Mark ketchup because he knew he would whine.
“Well, the point of the next test isn't only to eat, you know. It's a test that focuses on courtesy and étiquette. It's the royal family, after all. We need to be able to hold ourselves during official situations, like a dinner. It's tricky.”
“You've never really liked this kind of stuff,” Jeno pointed out.
Donghyuck sighed, because it was true. But despite that, he'd never been rude, and was careful when needed to be. Doyoung had been making sure his whole life that he followed the rules, or at least knew what the rules were. Donghyuck wasn't dumb.
“It'll be alright,” he shrugged. “I am used to it, I saw their Highnesses in official meetings enough time to know how to act.”
“Act... It's funny you use that verb. That's all an act, right. It doesn't really feel genuine to me, sometimes. All these bowing and smiles and light conversations,” Jeno whispered, looking at the sky.
And Donghyuck could understand. Sometimes, he thought the same, too. How he had to see Mark's forced and polite smile in front of officials he was meeting with his father, even if Donghyuck would have given a piece of his mind easily because of what came out of their mouth. The game of push and pull, dominating or being dominated, holding power and hiding assets. It was a strategy game in real life. Donghyuck knew he was part of this culture, but he had learnt to analyze it.
“How do you know when someone is genuine or if it's just an act for them?” Jeno added, lost in thoughts.
Donghyuck wanted to ask him if something was wrong, but Jisung came to sit beside them at the same moment, followed by Johnny who held out water bottles so they could stay hydrated.
“So, Donghyuck, what did you gift Mark again, for the first trial?” Johnny asked when they all drank a bit.
Donghyuck was sheepish for a second, and then he replied:
“A maple tree seed. So that Mark can plant it and see it grow.”
“Where does that idea come from?”
“I– I just thought of the tree we like in the garden, the one we played around when we were younger. I don't know, I thought something related to our friendship would be a good idea.”
“Unusual choice for sure, but it worked. Mark chose to keep you for the second trial, after all.”
“Mark planted it already, you know?” Jisung said. “Last time I was on night duty, and before bed, he made a mess to put it in the pot and water it. It's by his window, and he checks it often, even if it's not like a maple tree will sprout in three days,” Jisung laughed.
Something warm spread in Donghyuck's chest. He didn't go to Mark's room since that time after the birthday party, and he couldn't spend as much time with him as when he was his bodyguard. At least his friends could keep him a bit updated. Right now, Jungwoo was with Mark, who was attending some formal meetings related to him finally being of age.
“You should have seen one of the presents Mark got,” Jeno said, “it was a huge watermelon. If I didn't know Hyuck's present, I would have thought this was his. It was hilarious, because Mark only opened expensive stuff one after the other, and then there was this enormous fruit on the table. It was kinda cute, though. Mark loves watermelon, and this one was an overpriced yet delicious one.”
“Do you know who gifted it?”
“Yes, it was Prince Lucas. The tall one with the big doe eyes?”
“He seemed fun at Mark's birthday party, so I'm not surprised he came up with this present,” Johnny commented.
Donghyuck remembered him; he had been one of the suitors that stood out to him the most, and apparently, to Mark as well – he knew his best friend well. Lucas had been nothing but kind and enthusiastic, talking to everyone with courtesy and a smile, sometimes surprisingly self conscious but always finding his balance again quickly.
“So spill, Donghyuck, who do you think can be running for a long time in the competition?” Jisung asked, really curious, all innocent looking yet you could understand how sneaky he was in his sparkling eyes.
Donghyuck couldn't blame him; it was one of the most interesting things happening in the palace nowadays for sure, and the media could only cover the competition to a certain point. Donghyuck, being part of it, had all the juicy details, even if nothing really interesting had happened yet.
“Well, obviously, Prince Lucas has a good start. Mark seems to have liked to talk with Prince Ten as well, and he was the one who gifted a really interesting series of art prints that Mark liked. Other than that, I'd say that Prince Yuta and Prince Jaemin seem quite enamoured with Mark.”
“Prince Jaemin, the one who's always smiling and, let's say it frankly, flirting?” Jisung asked – everyone snorted. “Come on, that's true, I've been with Mark once when they were talking. Prince Jaemin was really nice to me, too. He looks really friendly and attentive.”
“That flustered Mark for sure,” Jeno commented. “I've seen it too.”
“What about Prince Yuta? He's the best friend of Prince Ten, right?”
“Haven't talked to him more. We are so many, and even if we spend time together, usually when Mark is around, I don't even know the others that much. For example, the ones who didn't pass the first trial, they didn't really stick to my mind.”
“Well, you were too relieved Mark didn't say your present was shit to the point you forgot how the first trial ended once you knew you were in the clear,” Jeno joked around.
Donghyuck elbowed him in retaliation. Maybe he should be more attentive to all the suitors, even those out of the competition already. Who knew if some wouldn't be bitter of having lost their chance, to the point they could do something remotely bad to Mark? He knew Mark was protected by trustful and skillful people, but he was always a bit wary.
“And when is the second trial?”
“This Saturday.”
“Anything planned with Mark before that?”
Donghyuck shook his head no. He was busy, and he himself had meetings with Doyoung, technical details for the competition, talking about his wardrobe and last minute recommendation. It was kind of boring. He was also a bit lost; did he have the right to seek out Mark's company? Since he wasn't his bodyguard anymore – for now – he didn't even know what reason he could have to spend time with him. It felt a bit weird to him because he didn't know if the other suitors did that – invited Mark to enjoy an activity, out of the planned different tests. He had to ask Doyoung about that. In the meantime, Donghyuck found himself spending time with his other friends more, when they weren't on duty.
“I'm excited for the progress of the competition. By the way, Hyuck, don't forget the trainings to prepare for the third trial,” Johnny reminded him.
“I will only know if I can attend them after the results of the second trial, you know that?”
Johnny scoffed, and Jeno and Jisung too.
“As if you wouldn't pass this trial easily, too.”
Donghyuck realized his friends had a lot of trust in him, for them not to even seem bothered by the possible idea of Donghyuck loosing, as if that would never happen. At least some people cheered for him.
(When he came back to his room to take a shower and remove all the dust, he once again got this weird feeling, of living the competition like an outsider, out of his own body, despite being a suitor like the others. As if he was only taking a place he didn't deserve, as if the outcome didn't matter as much to him, while it for sure was. After all, he was Mark's best friend, but could he even marry him? That was ridiculous. His decision to partake in the competition never really took into account that possibility; at least, Donghyuck tried to make himself believe that.
Mark would end up with a spouse he loved. And Donghyuck couldn't see himself there, proudly standing next to Mark, only the both of them. But he also couldn't imagine someone else, either, without having a weird ache in his chest.)
▬▬ι═══════ﺤ -═══════ι▬▬
Donghyuck checked himself one last time in the mirror, replaying Doyoung's recommendation in his head. Since it was an official dinner with people from several different countries, Donghyuck had to follow the international rules, but the greetings were done as usual from their countries. It was a Saturday night dinner, in Summer, so his outfit had to somewhat involve white silk. When they would be sitting – first Mark, because he was the most important person, since the dinner was organized for him – they had to wait for everyone's glasses to be served by the employees before cheering and having a sip. It could be common sense for some, but the rich people liked to have some tricky étiquette that would slightly change because of specific circonstances, and it was their job tonight to do their best and show they remembered well the theory and could apply it like a mathematics theorem.
Most of it was automatic for Donghyuck, but he should be careful. Taking between his fingers the wrong spoon for the cold potage as the hors-d'oeuvre, and for sure he would have point deduced from his overall grade. The dinner wouldn't be only between Mark and all his suitors in a cheerful mood. There would be higher-ups at the table, that were there to analyze everyone's gestures and attitude. As if they were filmed and then scrutinized for the slightest mistake that shouldn't even count. But rules were rules, right. It was a game, like any other, and Donghyuck hated to lose.
When he arrived to the room that would hold the dinner with the five minutes early that were required in that kind of situation – but he shouldn't enter the room yet, because then that would be considered rude as probably the employees were adding the final touch to everything – the other suitors were there too. He spotted Jaemin conversing with Renjun, and out of habit, he came to greet them first. They were all following the implied dress code that hadn't been precised but that everyone was supposed to know, so that was a good point for all of them already. Donghyuck couldn't help but look at everyone as if he was the one who had to give them a final appreciation, but maybe it was so he could see if he himself remembered what would be considered as completely opposite to what the good manners were supposed to be. He sighed; he was once again getting too serious, eyeing people as if he had to gauge the situation to be able to protect Mark to the fullest, acting even before the danger was there.
It was a dinner, he shouldn't be so tensed – maybe a little, Doyoung would remind him, but it was also a moment to converse pleasantly. All the rich and powerful people knew how to have fun, sometimes, despite the responsibilities their power gave them.
“You still look like you're Mark's bodyguard, even if he's not here yet, with that intense stare you have. Déformation professionnelle?” Renjun joked a bit, maybe trying to make Donghyuck laugh to relax him.
And maybe it was, to always be so alert and attentive when it was related to Mark surrounded by people, when it wasn't only Donghyuck and Mark alone, in their own world that they crafted since they were five.
When Donghyuck's answer didn't come, Renjun paled a bit and a worried expression took place on his face.
“I apologize if I said something that offended you,” he said, bowing a little bit.
Donghyuck realized he'd made a mistake by being too distracted, and touched Renjun's elbow as a gesture of comfort and apologize itself.
“Why would you say that? You did nothing wrong. I am– was Prince Mark's bodyguard, after all.”
Renjun scrutinized him for a few seconds.
“And I am glad you affirm it so strongly. I'm sorry, I thought– I thought that was a sensible subject. But you are no less than any of us around here, you know. It's not because people put the word prince in front of our names that we are superior. I wanted to let you know that, because sometimes I feel like you seem guilty to be among us. If anything, you being so close to Prince Mark should be an advantage you should be proud of.”
“Prince Mark is a really lovable man, and we should all be grateful if there are some people he enjoys the company. That's common sense,” Jaemin added.
Donghyuck smiled at these words. If Mark chose Jaemin in the end, then Donghyuck's mind would be a bit more at peace, to know that Jaemin had said that. Renjun was attentive and understanding, which was a good point, too.
When Mark arrived, the metaphorical dance – as Donghyuck called it – began. There were all the greetings, the order to enter the room, the proper comments to make, that needed to seem natural and as fluid as a small stream, but was rehearsed like a traditional and classical choreography. Donghyuck managed this part well, remembering Doyoung's nagging but caring voice in the back of his mind.
When it was time to sit at the table and enjoy the dinner, Donghyuck did it well too; sitting straight on his seat, no elbow on the table, napkin folded into a triangle on his laps, little glass for the sparkling water and bigger balloon glass for the wine, never using your spoon in your right hand, and be sure to hold your knife properly if it wasn't a dish to use chopsticks – and so on. Accumulation of little details that could sometimes make some of them clumsy.
No major incident happened, even if some of them lost more points than others because of awkward conversation themes, improper ways to cut a fish dish, wrong drink to get with cream pasta.
Whatever you liked or disliked, you always had to eat everything put in your plate. Food had been prepared by hardworking people, and some people couldn't afford the same abundance of flavors, so it was only polite to not be difficult. They weren't kids anymore, either. That was sometimes difficult to follow even for Mark and everything he represented – his family, the country – and that always made Donghyuck laugh, to have a glimpse of what Mark had in his plate, during a business lunch in presence of their Highnesses, while he himself was standing a few step backs as Mark's bodyguard.
Tonight, Donghyuck saw dessert arrive with a delight, even more when he spotted watermelon and Mark's eyes sparkled. Lucas made a comment, that added a dust of red on Mark's cheeks. Everyone was beginning to relax more, because of the alcohol hitting more or the end of the dinner – and the trial – approaching, Donghyuck wasn't sure.
Only one person around the table seemed panicked at the view of the bowls of freshly cut and summer fruits brought to each one of them. Donghyuck looked, slightly puzzled, at Ten, who now arbored a fake smile, obvious enough since he was sitting near him.
Mark was engrossed in a conversation with Lucas, so he didn't see the commotion happening around Ten.
Without a word, Ten was trying to scoop as much fruit bites as he could to put it in Yuta's bowl. His best friend, sitting next to him, was amused by his behaviour, but used his own little fork as a defence weapon to stop Ten's antics. Donghyuck snickered seeing their little battles. They were doing their best to keep smiling, with quick glances around them as if they weren't doing anything that could deduce them several points.
“Yuta, I swear to god, please take it... save me,” Ten whispered, urgent.
Yuta replied with a forced smile, as low as he could, “what are you doing, take that ananas back.”
Their cutlery bumped in their desperate battle, and it issued a clear sound, not loud but surprising enough to the ear for Mark to turn his head toward the two best friends, a kind smile on his face. He eyed the fruits inside Yuta's bowl – half of it was the fruits that have gravitated from Ten's own plate – and Ten's compromising pose, with a handful of ananas bites on their way to feed Yuta. The two best friends froze.
“What's happening here?” Mark chuckled, intrigued, but not assessing the reality of the situation.
Donghyuck looked at them like he looked at a tennis match, interested in the development of the situation.
“I only wanted to give Yuta some of my own ananas, since it is his favourite fruit. I thought it would please him,” Ten replied after a second of shock, getting back on his two feet with an excuse that could be plausible enough. Next to him, Yuta held back rolling his eyes – that for sure didn't follow any étiquette anywhere around the world, and would have cut Yuta's grade by half.
“What a great best friend,” Mark commented, and he added with a hint of teasing, “I wonder if Donghyuck would do that for me, too.”
Donghyuck chuckled politely, but when he caught Mark staring at him, they had a little moment between the two of them; there was this clear fondness in Mark's eyes, as if it was telling Donghyuck that Mark knew how much he did for him, everyday, since so many years. Be it fetching watermelon in the kitchens when everyone was asleep, or being sure to take care of his security.
Ten ended up taking a bite of an apple before accepting his fate and lose points over the matter. Donghyuck heard him muttering that he didn't care, anyway. He didn't ignore the little assortiments of cakes, however, and it was with a sweet lingering taste in their mouth that everyone finished the dinner. When Mark thanked the employees and asked to congratulate the people in the kitchens, he put his napkins folded in front of the empty plates, and stood up, the sign for everyone else to do the same if they wanted.
Some conversations at the table slowly died down, while the smooth and golden atmosphere of the big dinner room enveloped them more, now that they weren't focused on the dishes. Someone opened the large doors leading to another room, where they could enjoy some leisure time.
The conversation derived towards music, which Donghyuck was glad for, and he listened while offering the expected little hums to show he was interested in what was said.
“Prince Mark, you told us you could play the guitar, right?” Jaemin asked at some point, and Mark nodded. “Could you play some for all of us to hear? I think it would be delightful to end the evening on such a sweet note, pun intended.”
Some of the suitors chuckled while Mark stuttered but accepted the kind request. An employee was asked to go get Mark's guitar, while everyone took place in the scattered armchairs in the other part of the room, conversing still after such a dinner. The trial was almost finishing, but the results wouldn't be announced until the next day, after a meeting between Mark and his advisors that had shared the dinner with them.
Donghyuck met Mark's eyes while taking place close to him, and he could sense the little anticipation he had from performing in front of everyone. Donghyuck knew he was good – what couldn't Mark do? – and even if he was stressed now, he wouldn't be after. Mark was made to have the attention on him, and that was a good thing he was the heir, with all the attention he got. It was stressful, but Mark was serious and magnanimous. Donghyuck had heard him play the guitar several time, and he couldn't wait to hear him again.
That's when Renjun, sat next to him, said loud enough for Mark to hear it too:
“Didn't you say that you like to sing, Donghyuck? What about an impromptu duet with Prince Mark?”
Donghyuck looked at Renjun, surprised at the proposition, remembering they indeed talked about it over their full plates, and then looked at Mark, trying not to show how eager he was to know his opinion on the idea.
“I would be pleased, but it is Prince Mark's decision to make, I believe,” he carefully replied.
Mark arbored a huge smile, that he actually wasn't expecting.
“I would love to, if you would have me and my guitar backing. Donghyuck got the most angelic voice I've heard,” he added for everyone else.
A few suitors looked at Donghyuck, with that air that could easily be translated as the mutual knowledge that Donghyuck got an advantage in Mark's favourites.
When Mark finally got his guitar, he tuned it effortlessly, giving all his attention on the chords with the room fading away around him. Donghyuck knew what music brought to Mark, and how it was his haven and his favourite pastime when he didn't want to think of the weight of the kingdom on his shoulders. And Donghyuck felt grateful that Mark allowed him in that little bubble.
“What song should we play?” Mark asked him, raising his head to look at his best friend, and for a second Donghyuck was disoriented.
Mark was fumbling with the strings on the guitar, creating a random melody that was still pleasing to hear. He had a real talent, and maybe in another universe it would have been his whole purpose in life. But right there, he was the heir, and was about to play a duet with Donghyuck.
A note played at random reminded him of a song Mark made him listen to one day, and that he had learnt the lyrics of.
“The song you like, Edge of Desire?” Donghyuck suggested, in a softer voice than he expected.
A small smile illuminated Mark's face. He nodded, and tried a few chords to get the feeling back, before looking at Donghyuck and counting down the beginning of the song.
The rapid chords resonated in the room, with Mark's familiar and skilled fingers following the melody without a hitch. Donghyuck basked in the music, and then took a breath, opened his mouth, and let his smooth voice recite the english lyrics. The words added to the notes melted together, complementing each other, and with a bit of a stretch, Donghyuck felt like it linked Mark and him too.
Sitting next to each other, creating these melodic sounds for entertaining the others, Donghyuck still forgot about who was watching them, and enjoyed the happiness it brought him, to share this moment with his best friend.
He remembered when Mark told him that the first time he listened to this song, he'd felt refreshed, he'd felt calm. He remembered the many late nights, where Mark learnt the chords and taught the lyrics to Donghyuck. He remembered bowls of cereals and milk secretly taken from the kitchens at midnight, eaten on Mark's bed.
(If Donghyuck had not closed his eyes for a moment, he would have seen Mark, mesmerized, turning his head to look at how beautiful Donghyuck was while singing with his whole heart. But then Donghyuck glanced at Mark, too, and Mark's gaze already skittered away.
An embarrassment, a feeling that none of them made something of. The music drowned everything else instead.)
The last bit of the lyrics resonated in the room, and Mark slowed down the chords, the memory of the moment they just shared vibrant in everyone's mind, almost too precious and intimate to look at.
“There I just said it, I'm scared you'll forget about me.”
Donghyuck wondered where the song stopped, and where his feelings began.
▬▬ι═══════ﺤ -═══════ι▬▬
“I can't believe Ten is still able to compete despite the silent disaster it has been at the dinner when he refused to eat his fruits,” Renjun said, looking at said prince who was doing a faint while training.
All the suitors left after the second trial were in the palace's biggest training room, to prepare for the third test. They now were only ten left, and you could sense the bit of nervousness mixed with the habit they now had to all be around each other. Donghyuck didn't know if the competition was going too fast or too slow. All he was really aware of was that he was still part of it, and that the next trial was the one to assess their strength. The first part would be a fencing tournament between the ten suitors, then the second part would be a one on one duel against Johnny, the strongest weapon master in the palace – if not the country.
Donghyuck was confident for this trial. Physical strength was his best asset. He was less used to fencing, but was still surprisingly good. He really had to do his best against Johnny – even if Johnny could be better than him, at least Donghyuck reassured himself by thinking that all the other suitors would have a hard time, too. Johnny had a powerful strength and seriousness during fights that could bewilder people, when they were used to his gentle smile.
Not any of Donghyuck's friends were surprised when he was announced to be part of the third trial. Jungwoo, Jeno and Jisung asked him to do his best to honor the bodyguard position they shared. And as Johnny had told him the week before, he didn't forget about the trainings to prepare for it.
He was waiting for his turn while Ten was training against Johnny. The duel would be without any weapon, only pure strength. Donghyuck looked at the dance that had become the fight between Johnny and Ten.
Ten was obviously smaller and thinner than Johnny, but that was something he had in common with Donghyuck. Just like him, Ten bet on his fast moves and dodges to tire Johnny. They were gravitating closer than what he was used to, though. The stares they exchanged were intenses, too; Donghyuck was sure they could only see each other and the battle they were in, forgetting everyone around them. That was how serious they were for training, and it surprised him.
At some point, Ten dodged a punch, and while he twirled around Johnny to confuse him, close to his face, he murmured something in his ears. It had been so fast and smooth that almost no one could have seen it. The whispered words took Johnny aback, though, and Ten used the little surprise to push Johnny on the floor by a well placed blow in the back coupled with a sweep to make Johnny fall.
Impressive – however, Donghyuck had enough knowledge in fighting that he knew that without the diversion, Ten would have lost and Johnny won without discussion.
“Not my last victory, I hope,” Ten exclaimed while helping Johnny to get back on his feet by stretching his hand.
Johnny looked sheepish to have lost, but he didn't linger on it, and called Donghyuck instead.
They battled just like he was used to. It was Donghyuck's routine, Donghyuck's job. He did his best as always, be it a training, a competition, or real life. He was serious about it.
Johnny congratulated him when he won, and from afar he saw Yuta giving him a thumbs up. He smiled, trying to regulate his harsh breathing because of all his efforts.
When Donghyuck came back to the bench to fetch a towel and dry the sweat rolling on his temples, a suitor sitting there alone looked at him with a little bit of disdain and disgust. The evident animosity toward him took him by surprised, used to the other suitors' kindness, and he wondered what could have caused it. He kept silence, drinking water to soothe his dry throat, when the suitor talked, lowering his tone:
“The advantage you have is so blatant that it's a surprise no one else is talking about it.”
Donghyuck, now wary and tensed, raised his head to look into his eyes.
The fact that they were only the two of them in that part of the gymnasium, all of the others scattered around and focused on their techniques, must have been the reason why this suitor dared to adress him like that.
“Perhaps your victory in this competition is already secured and going through all these trials is only a formality, when you know that Prince Mark will always chose you. Should I complain that their Highnesses are being dishonest in this competition?”
“How dare you defame the royal couple? There is no such thing as cheating here. I am competing in all fairness, just like all of you,” Donghyuck spat, trying to keep at bay the ugly things that he could have replied instead.
However, there was fear stirring his chest, now. These feelings he'd tried to forget, that Doyoung had tried to soothe the best he could because they were unfounded; of not having the right to compete, of being way too close to Mark to begin with to dare putting his name on that damn suitor list.
Of not being the right one for Mark, whatever he tried.
“You talk about fairness, but you have all these advantages, since you know Prince Mark so well. Even the training you received is special.”
The other's face harbored a vile smirk, and Donghyuck hid a shiver.
“But despite all that, you'll never be more than a poor adopted guy, I believe.”
Donghyuck's breath hitched and his head spinned, feeling worse than if he had got hit in the plexus.
He couldn't process the several verbal attacks thrown at him – how ridiculous they were, accusing him of being favored to then crush him saying he'd never success because of his origins. It didn't matter to Donghyuck's brain right now. He lost his own wit and that seemed to please the suitor in front of him.
How did he even manage to go this far in the competition if he was such a hateful guy? What if he hurt Mark with the same kind of offensive words?
A hand delicately touching his shoulder brought Donghyuck back to reality. Still troubled, Donghyuck turned his head to meet the caring doe eyes of Prince Lucas, who smiled at him. Then, Lucas looked at the other suitor, who suddenly seemed less sure of himself.
“Sir Johnny is waiting, it is your turn to train with him. You're late already, and he's not happy about it,” Lucas said, voice stable yet obviously harsh.
Had he heard what Donghyuck had been accused of?
The suitor scurried away, leaving Donghyuck alone with Lucas. The hand on his shoulder was a surprisingly soothing weight; Lucas guided him toward the bench to sit, and sat next to him.
“Maybe drink a bit, you've done really well in the training, it's really impressive.”
Donghyuck, still silent, nodded and gulped down more water. The fresh liquid cleared his mind and calmed him down more.
Lucas was still next to him, and Donghyuck wondered if he would say anything about what had just happened. But instead of commenting on it, Lucas said, looking at his hands on his laps:
“You know, I didn't live with my parents when I was young. I was sent to my grandmother in another country, and I only came back to fulfill what was expected of a prince when I was eleven.” A pause. “I've grown up in such a different atmosphere, that even now I'm a bit surprised to see how the life in a palace is. I don't regret anything, be it my childhood or my late venue back to my parents. They had their reasons. I'm just doing my best now, and I'm happy like that.”
He chuckled.
“We haven't talked a lot since the competition began, right? Well, I just wanted to remind you that you had nothing to be ashamed of, be it your origins or your own assets that you've worked on. And I wanted you to know that I am honored we are part of the same competition.”
Donghyuck looked at Lucas, and felt all the kindness that this prince held, how a good person he was.
And Donghyuck thought, if it was Lucas who won the competition, then Mark would be with someone who proved that he truly deserved him.
“Thank you, it's really kind of you to have defended me. And to– to share this with me.”
Lucas smiled.
“It's nothing. I hope I managed to clear your head a little bit. After the training, I suggest we go to the advisors to tell them what happened.”
Donghyuck could see from there how furious Doyoung would be once he learnt what happened, and he wrinkled his nose in amusement, despite how harsh the accusations had been.
“Yes, let's do that.”
▬▬ι═══════ﺤ -═══════ι▬▬
The days until the third trial passed in a blur. Donghyuck didn't know if anything had been said to the suitor who falsely accused him; the day of the trial, he was still with them. It didn't really ease Donghyuck to see him, but he didn't have a say in this. The only thing he could do was to do his best and win over him if they ever were put against each other for the first part of the trial.
The day was hot, the field sunny and surrounded by stands, and in the middle of them, there was the special alcove where Mark was already sitting, in presence of his parents, Jeno and Johnny.
The ten suitors stood in front of them, and greeted them formally before the beginning of the first part of the trial – fencing. They were all in the required white and tight clothes, their sword and mask in hand. The advisors in charge of the matches reminded them the important rules, then unveiled the running orders.
Donghyuck saw his name next to the suitor he dreaded. However, instead of feeling anger or worse – fear – simmer in his chest, he made himself as impassive and fierce as he was used to when it came to dealing with what he was trained for.
Being a bodyguard asked you to be strong, not only physically, but also mentally. Donghyuck knew he could lose precious concentration if feelings came in the way while fighting. He needed to push all of this aside and focus on one thing: winning.
While everyone fussed around him to get people where they had to, Donghyuck stayed silent – almost cold. This trial meant something more to him – it wasn't only a test to be able to participate in the fourth trial; it was also a test for Donghyuck to prove that he was worthy of protecting Mark. That was his work. If he didn't win that day, then he would question his values, his purpose.
Half of them would be eliminated after the results of that trial. And Donghyuck needed to be part of the five suitors left.
The duels took place one after another; the results of each one would define the rank of the suitors, who then would do a second round, and as many as needed so there was a certain winner, above everyone. That would mean the first part of the trial was done, and they could go to the second one.
Donghyuck saw that everyone was good; fencing is a rather rapid sport, where they needed concentration and reactiveness to be able to win. Donghyuck was confident, because that was one of his assets for sure. Just like he used his thin but strong stature to win against Johnny when they trained, he could do the same for fencing.
And that's what he did when he was called for his duel.
He and the other suitor faced each other, mask in place, sword secured in hand. Donghyuck breathed calmly, eyes fierced and analyzing every move the other could do. One step ahead and Donghyuck would react before thinking to secure his win.
The other suitor was heavy on his feet. He could have a strong attack, but that wouldn't unsettle Donghyuck. As he had thought, he didn't need to attack first, and only defend himself in a fraction of second: the suitor propulsed himself forward, his sword stretched toward Donghyuck's torso, but the move had been too slow, not coordinated enough. It was easy for Donghyuck to avoid it in a swift feint, and knowing it'd take the other by surprise and assure his easy victory, Donghyuck attacked so fast that the other dropped his sword and Donghyuck heard him curse behind his mask.
They stayed still for a few seconds, Donghyuck's sword touching right in the middle of the breastplate protecting the other's heart. A move that ensured Donghyuck's victory, since he'd touched the vital point.
The referee shouted the end of their duel, proclaiming Donghyuck the winner, and he finally exhaled and lowered his sword. He bowed in front of his enemy, and then went back to the sides.
Now Donghyuck had to continue to be as efficient as he'd just been.
When he looked up to have a glimpse of Mark's expression, he saw a worried frown deforming his traits, and that twisted something in Donghyuck's chest. He didn't like to see this, as if Mark didn't have enough faith in him for succeeding. Or that Donghyuck wasn't attentive enough to protect himself.
The following duels were a bit more of a challenge – Ten and Renjun had almost got him, with their own assets – but Donghyuck managed to end the first part of the trial as the winner.
It eased something in his chest. Now was only left the duel with Johnny, and if there was a day Donghyuck was determined to win against him, that was today.
Johnny left Mark's alcove to go onto the fields, while the suitors left to change into other clothes than the obligatory ones for the fencing trial.
Then it was waiting all over again for his own turn.
Donghyuck was sitting next to the suitors he almost considered as friends, now. It was weird, because shouldn't he see them as rivals? They were all passing these trials to prove that they were the best person to deserve Mark's hand in marriage. All of them showed more or less a certain expectation in their own behaviour, attitude and performance in each test. As light as the first one had looked – choosing a present seemed trivial, now – the second one had been more serious, and this third one actually burdened the suitors more than they showed. Donghyuck tended to forget how fierce Johnny was, because of how used to it he was; he had learnt to work with it. The other suitors barely knew Johnny, and were struck by his strength. Even if Johnny had been asked to be careful for the second part of the trial – the suitors weren't expected to win, but to show how they could attack and defend themselves – there still was this stress of having to fight against a well-known weapon master.
Donghyuck tried to change his mind by listening to Renjun discussing the ranking with the others. Ten was at the fifth place, but he couldn't stop telling the others princes that he didn't think he'd keep that place, and instead go down in the rank.
“I know I'm not the best at defending myself during a duel,” Ten shrugged. “I'm flexible enough, but I prefer to use this for when I dance.”
“You won against Johnny during the training, though,” Yuta reminded him.
“It was once, and I wasn't being fair. It wouldn't assure me a victory this time.”
“So you wouldn't care if you're out after this trial?” Renjun asked.
“It's part of the competition, right, to have losers anyway. If it's me, it's me, that's fine.”
“You're not falling for Mark, are you?” Donghyuck said quietly.
Ten's eyes widened in surprise, but then he shrugged.
“I mean, Prince Mark is kind, interesting and handsome, but he's not really my type.”
Donghyuck had a few suspicions, and now it'd been confirmed. He was impressed Ten could say that so easily, without looking guilty. All of them wondered what was his type, but no one asked; it would be improper.
Ten added, “I believe that, as much as Prince Mark has to chose the suitor he likes the most, as much as he can fall for his suitor, the suitor also has the right to take care of his own feelings. Why should I force myself if I don't see myself marrying Prince Mark and have a fulfilled life? I would be happier if Prince Mark's future spouse falls for him just as much.”
Next to Donghyuck, Jaemin tensed. Donghyuck saw him nervously looking toward the alcove where Mark was sitting, surrounded by Jeno and his parents. However, Jaemin didn't say a word.
Why would he react like that after Ten's talk?
“That's actually an interesting way to see the competition,” Renjun commented. “I think most of us have been added to the suitor list as it is a tradition in all our neighbour countries to do so. We're different from our parents' generation, however. As for me, I wasn't displeased to join the competition at all; as much as I didn't know a lot about Prince Mark, he's indeed a person I'm delighted to converse with. Trust and respect are already there; mutual affection can always blossom into love later. We're not thirteen anymore, believing in love for the eternity when we only know each other since a few weeks. We are still taking part of an arranged marriage right now, after all.”
Donghyuck and Jaemin kept silent – Donghyuck troubled because he'd never thought of the competition like that – of the feelings of the other suitors, so different depending on who was talking. Jaemin seemed paler than before, and that alerted him a bit, but he didn't want to embarrass him nor draw unwanted attention on him.
What was Donghyuck's opinion on the matter? What were Donghyuck's feelings? What were they for real?
The referee called Donghyuck's name, and when he lifted his head and met Johnny's eyes, Donghyuck knew he couldn't be overwhelmed once again with thoughts that would mess up with his brain and make him lose.
So he did what he always did, more and more, these past few weeks: he locked it up far away, swallowed it down not to see it again; and then he stood up, and joined Johnny on the field for their duel.
Donghyuck blocked everything except his strength and focus on winning.
And he felt like waking up when he was above Johnny, who was on the ground, with Donghyuck's knee against his chest.
He had won, once again. Of course he had won.
(Would he win until the end, though?)
The duels ended hours later; soon enough they had to stand to listen to the official results.
Even if everyone could guess the final ranking, the ten of them went to stand in front of Mark's alcove, just like when the trial had begun. They were more flushed and tired, but proudly stayed straight, waiting for the advisors to announce the five winners.
Donghyuck tried to calm his heart, and calm the weird turmoil taking place in his chest. Ten and Renjun's conversation was still playing in his head, but he managed to stop his thoughts from gravitating around it again.
He looked straight ahead of him. Mark was looking at each one of them, a serious expression on his face – probably absorbing how serious the whole trial had been, compared to the others.
“The fifth place is Prince Renjun,” the referee announced, and in the stillness of the scene, his words resonated easily.
Renjun took a step and bowed, then straightened his back again, waiting for the other suitors to be called.
“Fourth place is Prince Jaemin.”
Jaemin smiled and did the same as Renjun.
“Third place is Prince Yuta.”
Donghyuck felt a drip of sweat going down his temple, just like he could see the ones clinging Yuta's rebel black strands that flowed over his forehead before hurtling his face.
“Second place is Prince Lucas.”
Donghyuck saw a little glint in Mark's eyes. Was it there for each one of the suitors who'd been called?
“Finally, the first place is Sir Donghyuck.”
Taking a big breath, Donghyuck moved forward, too.
That marked the end of the third trial.
▬▬ι═══════ﺤ -═══════ι▬▬
Donghyuck took a deep breath again, and then exhaled while counting to eight.
Still not working enough. His thoughts were in shambles and didn't want to stop throwing themselves against his cranial cavity.
Four walls weren't constricting him, at least. He had chosen to go outside, and his legs brought him out of habit to the tree of his childhood – always the same, as if he could still see a five-year-old Mark escalating the branches. Mark was everywhere in the palace, in every memory Donghyuck had; in all of his thoughts.
Why didn't he notice it sooner? He cursed under his shaky breath.
Of course Donghyuck had noticed. Except he was so focused on how Mark had always been his best friend, how he himself was his bodyguard, that he didn't want to even acknowledge that his feelings toward Mark were more than platonic. As if it still was friendship that he felt; as if he still only wanted to defend Mark's honor and protect him during the competition.
How did he even protect him? It was ridiculous. Donghyuck wanted to do so much more for Mark, and it felt like he'd done nothing since that fatidic day of Mark turning twenty.
He had closed his eyes for so long. Doyoung, Johnny, Jungwoo, they all knew what was going on, but they let him act like a fool, let him accept his feelings by himself, because he was old enough, and that was something he needed to do, not something he had to be told to do.
But now what? Now, what?
It was so frustrating.
Did it change anything now, that he acknowledged he liked Mark more than a best friend? They were roped into a competition to define Mark's future spouse. That could be the only chance for Donghyuck to end up with him and be blessed by the whole country and their neighbours. But what if he failed? They were still four other suitors to compete.
And they had a lot to offer to Mark, too, and Mark seemed to like them a lot, too.
Donghyuck could feel this ugly feeling gnawing at his lungs; this boiling jealousy and anger that grew the more he thought of other people charming Mark. Before he'd been uncomfortable; now he was almost furious.
Donghyuck didn't want to lose. He'd gone so far to protect Mark, and now his motive was more than that. He realized it would hurt so much not to be chosen as the one. So far, he'd done well in each trial, but Mark's choice would become way more important for the fourth and fifth trials. Would he still do well? Would Mark chose him, because he was his best friend only? Was he even considered like any other suitor? When it'd be time to actually chose his spouse, wouldn't Mark chose someone else?
(Donghyuck had seen how Mark was flustered when Jaemin flirted with him. He had seen how loud Mark had laughed when Lucas talked to him.)
It was overwhelming. It hurt. There was no time to bask in his feelings because he felt cornered like a poor animal who had to defend themselves against other threats.
Donghyuck stayed still for a long time. It was weird, not to have to attend a meeting with Doyoung, nor to be in company of the other suitors. Everyone was living their life in the castle, even the guests were now at ease. A perk of the competition, even for the disqualified suitors, was that the palace welcomed them for the whole duration of the trials.
The fourth trial was one that everyone was waiting for; it was a ball. What would be a ball without hundreds of guests? The whole palace would be as busy as a beehive, and in the middle of it, at the end of the ball night, Mark would chose the three last suitors allowed to participate to the fifth trial.
Donghyuck remembered Mark's birthday party; the crowd, the lights, the new people he'd met. It felt like such a long time ago.
“Donghyuck?”
Donghyuck startled, and he almost had a whiplash when he turned toward who had arrived.
Mark was standing next to him, frowning. Jungwoo was by his side.
“M-Mark,” Donghyuck stuttered ridiculously.
He wasn't expecting to see him, not in that condition at least, overwhelmed and upset. But Mark didn't seem to notice his discomfort.
“I wanted to talk to you for a bit.”
Donghyuck nodded without a word, because he didn't say no to Mark – he didn't say no to the heir.
Mark looked at Jungwoo with eyes full of a silent request, and his bodyguard seemed to understand it. He rolled his eyes a little bit, but took a few step backs, gesturing toward another bench that was in view but could leave them a semblant of intimacy.
(The fact that Jungwoo actually didn't leave them alone for real hurt; usually, Donghyuck sufficed as one person, as one bodyguard, to assure Mark's protection. It wasn't the same, now. Donghyuck wasn't a bodyguard, he was a suitor. He wasn't enough.)
Once Jungwoo was out of ear's reach, Mark sat next to Donghyuck, a little bit awkward, a little bit tensed. Donghyuck didn't know what to say or to do, and that was a first, almost.
So instead, it was Mark who talked first – after all, he'd been the one looking for him.
“I learnt that you've been threatened by one of the suitors that participated in the third trial,” Mark said, and Donghyuck could sense that he was trying to keep his voice under control; it was simmering with a hint of annoyance. “You should have told me. Why did I hear it from someone else?”
“Who told you?” Donghyuck replied instead of justifying his silence.
“The advisors you went to talk to, with Lucas. Lucas told me, too.”
There it was again: that dark wave, that wouldn't stop moving inside of Donghyuck, making him nauseous with jealousy and envy and anger.
“You're spending time with Lucas outside of the trials?”
That wasn't what Donghyuck should say. That wasn't even what he wanted to say; he should have told Mark that he'd have liked to spend time with him, too, that he missed him, that this competition was harder on him than he thought, and he wondered if Mark was feeling alright, too.
But he swallowed down all of this, because the jealousy took over him.
Mark clenched his jaw.
“Yes, I do. We can do that, you know? There's nothing wrong in doing that. You're the only one suddenly considering that I'm so far away. I'm still here, but since the suitors are in the palace, you act less and less like my best friend.”
Donghyuck's chest hurt more. Mark didn't stop, his voice climbing in volume.
“I barely know what you think of everyone, I didn't even know you've been harassed last time, and damn that hurt when I heard about it. You don't even ask me if I take good care of the maple tree seed you've offered me, and you don't ask me to spend some times only the both of us. Am I still important to you, Donghyuck? Am I only the heir for you now?”
No. Now, you're the man I love.
Donghyuck's throat was so constricted he couldn't say a word.
“You told me that we would face whatever happens together day by day, but, Hyuck, where were you?” Mark whispered, and that whisper ruined Donghyuck more than the screams.
Donghyuck didn't find the words that were needed; his thoughts and feelings where in shambles – the shame, the sadness, the jealousy, the yearning, the hopelessness. It was too much all at once, and between all of this, there were Mark's pained eyes, shining with unshed tears that were so rare to see on his familiar and soothing face.
After pregnant seconds that felt like a lot of things were breaking around them, Mark slowly stood up, and took a few steps away. It felt to Donghyuck like there were screams in Mark's eyes, but what was pounding at his ears were his own erratic heartbeats.
Jungwoo stood up and joined Mark's side, and Donghyuck looked at them leaving, with no word.
How ironic with all the feelings bubbling and ready to burst out of his chest.
▬▬ι═══════ﺤ -═══════ι▬▬
Donghyuck looked at himself in the mirror and it felt like a déjà-vu.
He scrutinized his outfit for the ball that was about to happen; the fourth trial was going to be a big one, with hundreds of guests, food, music, dances. Nothing too out of the ordinary from a usual rich party that the palace organized during time of festivities.
Donghyuck looked at his outfit. He was dressed in his family colors, a rich golden yellow that reminded him of the sun, coupled with pristine white. It looked expensive and against all odds, not too ostentatious despite the bold color. If he looked a certain way, it felt like his skin was radiating and glowing. He had put on makeup, too, and it accentuated his attentive eyes now sparkling with champagne glitters, his sharp cheekbones with a hint of highlighter, and his dark beauty spots stood out prettily on his cheeks.
It wasn't that he never dressed like that. It was just that he was used to attend big events by Mark's side as his bodyguard, and he had always privileged convenience over aesthetic.
Donghyuck looked good. Doyoung had made a good job helping him, and his heart fluttered with anticipation.
He realized he wanted to look good in front of Mark, so Mark would look at him, and find him handsome. It was this selfish need, to have Mark's attention on him, that made him shiver just thinking of it. That's what acknowledging his feelings brought to Donghyuck: a never-ending desire, always related to Mark.
The week had been a weird one; Donghyuck had realized how overwhelming it was to bear feelings for his best friend, in such a special situation. He also had noticed how his brain couldn't filter his thoughts as calmly as he usually would. He was supposed to be used to it, to analyze something with rationality and promptness. However, analyzing the world around him seemed easier than analyzing what was inside his heart. It was all so new to him, and he'd never learnt anything about it in a strategy book like he'd have for his bodyguard training.
Could you even learn in a book how feelings were supposed to work? It was something you learnt by experience. Donghyuck realized, too, that it was something to be talked about with the other person involved, because what was a relationship – be it platonic or more – without communication?
He had cruelly lacked that with Mark, and had taken time to breathe and think of why he felt overwhelmed and what he could do. Of course anxiety swayed in his veins, but he felt less like a kid after he had time to process more.
He had looked at what he could act on: and that was, without any surprise, as dumb as it was to say it so simply, to attend the fourth trial and do his best once again. Donghyuck scoffed and at the last second stopped his hand before touching his face. It wasn't the time to smear all of his makeup accidently.
Donghyuck picked up the brooch of sweet williams waiting for him on his vanity, and carefully put it on the collar of his vest. Just like the first party where the palace officially welcomed all of the suitors, he was still there with the sign of being one; the only thing that changed was that now, there were only five of them who could arbor such a meaningful decoration.
Donghyuck hoped he could still wear it after that night.
When he entered the party hall where the ball would take place, the room was already full of people and conversations. Out of habit, Donghyuck looked at the lights, the mirror, the guests, with an attentive stare. However, it quickly proved to be useless when he spotted Jaemin wave at him with his usual pearly smile, and Donghyuck joined him.
It was an art to know at what time to arrive to this kind of gathering. Donghyuck guessed that it was the same for any young person of his age, when they had to attend a party, to get drunk and then go to a club. He internally laughed, thinking of the upbeat and EDM songs that he knew where played in so many clubs in the city, but that he had barely experienced. Tonight wasn't a night to have silly dance battles on the latest hit songs; Donghyuck knew that his dance lessons, more traditional, would be more useful instead. He also knew it didn't mean it would be boring.
“Your suit is gorgeous,” Jaemin told him, and Donghyuck smoothed the hem of his jacket as if to keep the stress away just like the possible wrinkles off the fabric.
“Yours is as well.”
Jaemin smiled brightly and thanked him, before adding, “Prince Mark still isn't here, but he wouldn't take long, I believe.”
Donghyuck nodded. He didn't know if he would ever be ready for seeing him again, while knowing he could not avoid him, first of all because it was ridiculous and utopian to think so, and also because Donghyuck, despite the awkwardness and the unfounded fear, wanted to see Mark. He missed him so damn much. If he hadn't been such an idiot these past few weeks, the situation would have never evolved in something so complicated and ridiculous. He needed to apologize and to voice his thoughts, just like he'd always done before. Mark had taken the courage to come to him and express his mind that Donghyuck had neglected, so it was only time he did his part. Above everything, even above his feelings for Mark, his friendship with him was something too precious to lose. Donghyuck would hate himself if he didn't do his best to gain back Mark's soft eyes on him. He could still see his sad and disappointed face from their confrontation in the garden.
By his side, Jaemin looked around the hall absent-mindedly, as if a little out of it. Donghyuck took his time to greet whoever came to wish him a good evening, and idly talk was surprisingly easy to entertain, easing his nerves.
Doyoung came to the both of them fairly soon, greeting them and asking them to follow him to join the other suitors and officially begin the ball for the night. They walked toward a more cleared part of the hall, where Renjun, Lucas and Yuta were conversing. Each one of them arbored a fine and detailed suit to the colors of their own family; the mix of all of their different colors looked beautiful to Donghyuck. They all came from different countries but were at the same place for the same reason.
For Mark.
Donghyuck cleared his throat with a discreet cough, trying to ignore the sudden stress he had because they were all standing straight in a line, waiting for Mark to arrive. Around them, the guests were still engrossed in their conversations, as if they didn't doubt what was about to happen – the arrival of the Heir and their Highnesses. It was a game, to act delightfully at ease and just the right hint of surprised when they all knew the usual dance of this kind of gathering.
There was this anticipation that could be felt in the air when everyone knew that it was a matter of seconds until the big door would be opened and the royal family announced. Donghyuck loosened his fits that he had unconsciously closed under the trepidation.
An employee announced the arrival of Mark and his parents, and Donghyuck wondered how his voice could be heard over all the noise already, but there was something about the rich people and their power of knowing when to pay attention to the right thing.
The doors opened, and then it was a waltz of people greeting the royal couple and their son; they stopped to exchange a few words here and there, but from where he was standing, Donghyuck could see Mark's eyes sometimes looking toward them – toward his five suitors. They weren't that far from the entrance, but they had to stay still and wait for Mark to meet them.
Donghyuck noticed it only now, but it was Jungwoo who was of duty, again. It reminded him of that time in the garden. He wondered if Mark had talked about what happened with Jungwoo, or Jeno or Jisung. His friends had not interfered, at least had not directly talked to him about the matter, mostly because Donghyuck had been busy in his own head and in his meetings with Doyoung about his outfit and last minute dance sessions. Damn, he really needed to pay more attention to his friends. At least he had the other suitors to talk to, even if there conversations weren't the same. Donghyuck couldn't admit his feelings for Mark so easily; he didn't know if they were obvious, now. It was Ten who apparently was more open about his heart. The suitors, Yuta, Jaemin, Renjun and Lucas, they all seemed to like Mark, and the easy feelings were probably shared, but it was impossible for Donghyuck to guess Mark's final decision.
Perhaps Donghyuck was also too scared to dig the subject, because he didn't want to know if he'd be left behind in favour of someone else. Mark was upset at him, but Donghyuck was adamant on apologizing and being forgiven before the end of the night.
One by one, they greeted the royal couple and Mark, and just like that they spent a good quarter of an hour conversing about the weather, the ball, the guests, how the trials had been so far. Donghyuck never really felt like these moments were genuine, but they were unfortunately needed, and despite being a bit boring, they were easy to do.
Mark smiled at him just like he smiled to the others, and that put Donghyuck more at ease. He still felt this little tension between them, but it was nothing too triggering, more like two best friends who wanted to amend what had happened and make it better; if Donghyuck could feel that coming from Mark, then he was a bit more confident in his mission for the night. There was no way he spent another day with Mark giving him the cold shoulder.
When they announced the first dance, the suitors held their breath, waiting for Mark to choose his first partner. It was obvious that the whole room was waiting for it, too. With the softest smile and softest words, Mark thanked them again to be present that night, and walked toward Jaemin, offering his palm up for him to hold his hand.
“May I have the first dance with you, Prince Jaemin?”
Behind him, Donghyuck could feel the trepidation that Jaemin's own court members present that night couldn't suppress, probably delighted that Jaemin had been chosen for such a meaningful dance. The competition was fair, and the other suitors kept their smile while Jaemin lifted his slightly trembling hand and accepted Mark's offer.
The both of them went to the middle of the cleared space for the dancers, and just like watching a delicate painting, they began to move through the notes together, close to each other. It was a sight to behold as the both of them were handsome in their party outfits, swaying with ease. It wasn't only a ball for people to enjoy, it wasn't only a trial for the competition, it was also a show like only rich and powerful people could put up. Donghyuck tended to forget it, but behind every smile, every nod, every word exchanged, there were political matters, a play of power that could make his mind lost sometimes.
It felt like if he thought too much of it, he would drift from Mark more than he'd like. Donghyuck wasn't the one who was the heir of the country, he wasn't the one who was birthed in a rich family even if he got adopted at such a young age. What he knew, though, was that he wanted to stay by Mark's side, and he had already accepted all the duties coming with his difficult bodyguard's position. He needed to keep in mind that behind all this work, behind all the complicated cobweb that was politics, Mark was still Mark, a clever and bright person that blessed Donghyuck's life.
Halfway through the dance between Mark and Jaemin, it was time for the other people who wanted to dance too to join them, and a lot of couples followed their steps, adding the sound of the dresses and suits rustling in the room.
In the middle of fancy clothes and pleasant music, it was simple to forget this was the fourth trial, where no matter what, the suitors were judged on their outfits and poise. However, the final decision for the suitors having the honor to be part of the last trial was Mark's.
The ball passed by like what a ball was supposed to be: with people dancing. After the first music had stopped and molded into another rhythm, Mark thanked Jaemin for the first dance. From where he was standing, Donghyuck could see Jaemin's usual smile, but he couldn't help but find his smile tired, his eyes less shining than usual, despite the appearance. He didn't know Jaemin since a long time, but as they went through the same trials, he still felt responsible, in a way, and worried. Jaemin had no reason to look worried either, because it was obvious Mark liked him a lot.
While Jaemin was free to dance with other people now, Mark asked Renjun for a dance next. They didn't join the dancers right away, conversing instead, but when they were taken by the music, Donghyuck took the opportunity to go get something light to drink, as he couldn't dance before having danced with Mark first. He was joined by Jeno and Jisung, who were off duty for the night – Jungwoo, as he couldn't stay near Mark on the dance floor while he was waltzing around, was at a strategic place where he could see everything happening. The usual security was keeping the area under control, too.
“Waiting for your charming prince?” Jisung told him with his usual innocent but devil teasing tone he loved to have.
“I'll have you know that it's called the protocol, Jisung,” Donghyuck sighed, but still glad to actually be surrounded by people that were not waiting for him to be perfect.
“I prefer my version, it's funnier,” Jisung shrugged. “I'm glad I'm not on duty tonight, so I can raid the buffet,” he added while looking with enamoured eyes toward the tables.
He grabbed a bite size meat feuilleté and ate it while Jeno chuckled beside him.
“Do you plan on talking with Mark, tonight? We didn't really put our nose in your business out of consideration, but it was obvious that it wasn't like usual between you,” Jeno asked kindly.
“Yeah, Mark would look at his maple tree pot with a tearing sigh so many times,” Jisung commented, mouth half full.
Donghyuck winced, but reminded himself that Jisung was a really skillful bodyguard despite his younger age.
“It is planned, don't worry about it.”
“I'm glad.”
They had time to talk about trivial stuff, until the music change once again alerted Donghyuck. He eyed Renjun and Mark bowing at each other with a soft smile on both their faces. While Donghyuck was focused on Mark, Jaemin approached him, Jeno and Jisung. He cleared his throat, a bit unsure, and then, unexpectedly, asked:
“Sir Jeno, would you give me the honor to share the next dance with me?”
Jisung was munching on another feuilleté with a really sharp stare on Jeno and Jaemin, but Donghyuck didn't have more time to concentrate on them because from the corner of his eyes, he saw Mark coming their way, and when Jeno put his hand on Jaemin's, it was Mark's turn to plant himself in front of Donghyuck and ask him the same question, determination in his eyes:
“Would you give me the pleasure to have this dance with me?”
In a daze, Donghyuck accepted without hesitation, of course.
Taking Mark's hand in his felt like getting back to a familiar and soothing place, and Donghyuck realized how something so simple could be missed so dearly.
And just like the others, they began to dance together.
The first few steps were timid, just like Donghyuck and Mark's attitude toward each other. There were all of these words hanging around them, that were obvious but needed to be shared to make the situation come back to normal – or as normal as it could. All Donghyuck wanted was to properly apologize, and with Mark holding his hand gently, his other hand in the crook of Donghyuck's waist, waltzing with him, Donghyuck found the nerves to go ahead and do it.
He chose the words with the same delicacy the notes were played in the hall, murmuring because Mark's face was so close to him, this bubble protecting them from the guests despite being the center of the party right now. When Donghyuck looked at Mark and held his stare, nothing else really existed.
One step after the other, they escaped from the hall with just their words and their attention on each other.
“Are you enjoying the ball so far?” Donghyuck asked.
“I am, and you?”
“I've been a bit fidgety, but now that you're dancing with me, I'll later be able to ask other people to dance instead of waiting,” he joked around, and that light comment fit; Mark chuckled.
“I need to take care of the others, too,” Mark explained, more gently, as if he was scared of hurting Donghyuck.
He had no reason to; Donghyuck knew the rules of the competition, he was a suitor and not the only one at that. Mark was just doing what was asked of him. Despite his attitude the past few weeks, despite being angry and hurt, Mark was still considerate, and for a moment Donghyuck wanted to cry.
“You know I'm glad you got to know your suitors outside of the trials, right?”
Jealousy had been the first strong reaction, but he had reasoned himself.
“When I wasn't there even if you needed me, at least you weren't alone too much,” Donghyuck said, looking for his words, “I am not trying to find myself an excuse. I was in the wrong and I know the other suitors' company wasn't the same as being with me, your actual best friend, who's used to listen to your worries and who's made for the deep talk parts.”
A step that asked them to separate for a second before joining their hands again, and Mark was looking at him more intensely than before, silent.
“I wanted to apologize for the distance I created between us out of fear, and me not realizing it is not an excuse either. You deserve more than the poor show I've been doing, and I would like to change it and prove that I'm not a complete lost cause, if you'd have me again.”
Because whatever the outcome of the competition, Donghyuck knew he wanted to be there for Mark, no matter what.
“I missed you so much, Hyuck,” Mark whispered, and his words held a little emotional tremor.
“I missed you too,” Donghyuck replied, his voice a bit strangled.
And in that moment, Donghyuck let his feelings wash through him with acceptance, for the first time. He welcomed them and let them flow through his veins and his mind, not caring about the before and the after; he relished them silently, because he could and because he allowed himself this dance to feel close to Mark, even if Mark wasn't aware of his love for him. Nothing else mattered but this closeness and the fact that Mark had accepted his apology and that Donghyuck had promised to do his best for him.
In that moment, Donghyuck really forgot for a moment that Mark was the heir and himself a suitor, and just thought back on the simple happiness that was so similar to the one from their childhood.
“Are you taking good care of the maple tree seed?”
Mark's face brightened up, “it has sprouted now! It is so cute and tiny. So weird to think that in a few years it'll become a strong tree when we can only see little leaves now.”
Hearing that news made something warm spread through Donghyuck's chest. He was so glad his birthday present made Mark happy like that.
Their dance finished with the obvious sign that they both took care of the tension between them. Donghyuck bowed with a smile that reflected Mark's, and he went back to the side with Mark. His best friend chose to go to Yuta who was talking with Ten, and invited him for a dance. The both of them went back to the dance area fairly quickly, leaving Donghyuck and Ten alone.
For a few seconds, they just looked at their respective best friends dancing together.
“What a lovely duo you were.”
Donghyuck turned his eyes away from the glass of champagne he had taken, and smiled at Ten.
Ten was wearing a deep green suit with dark embroideries, accentuating his slim stature but not diminishing his confident poise; the sweet williams brooch wasn't on his collar anymore, as expected, and Donghyuck realized that that fact changed something in Ten, as if it had unlocked a part of himself that he had willingly kept away – out of respect for Mark.
And Donghyuck knew that Ten had no reason to still be focused on Mark, because he was out of the competition. Ten looked slightly more alert, his focus on someone else than the heir. He looked like he was finally drinking the fanciness of the palace – not that he had a blind eye on it since he'd come, more like he acknowledged it better, now that his mind was free of the obvious work that had been the competition.
“Thank you,” Donghyuck replied.
“It is delightful to see Prince Mark enjoying to dance with his suitors,” Ten added.
“You don't think he'd have been glad to dance with you?”
“Well, all the honor would have been for me, but obviously Prince Mark has his eyes on other people.”
Donghyuck bit his tongue to prevent himself from asking who Ten thought was the favourite. Mark was so polite and wholesome that he treated them equally, from what he'd seen – there was only Donghyuck who had put a distance between them, but now they had managed to talk about it and to settle their situation for good.
They both glanced at Mark dancing with Yuta, their little height difference a cute sight to behold. Donghyuck wondered if Ten wanted his best friend to win Mark's heart – Yuta had always seemed more interested in Mark than Ten had been. Donghyuck didn't even know who the palace was rooting for as Mark's future spouse. Surely the people couldn't help but have their favourites and bet on them, right?
Donghyuck was about to ask Ten if he wanted to dance as well, when the figure of a well-known person came to them; Johnny joined their little space and bowed respectfully.
“How do you find the ball so far?” Johnny politely asked.
“A pure glee,” Ten replied, looking at the weapon master with a hint of gladness in his eyes.
“I'm happy to hear that. Seems like you reconciled with Mark, Donghyuck?”
“We managed to talk and everything is good now.”
“Well, everything is going well, that's perfect.”
Donghyuck stared at Johnny with a bit of curiosity; he seemed a bit fidgety, as if he wanted to say something but needed some extra seconds to make himself do it. Around them, the music was slowing down to give way to another rhythm, and that was apparently what Mark's cousin needed to finally act.
“Prince Ten, would you have this dance with me?”
The smile Ten arbored expressed way more things than a simple yes. Donghyuck looked at the two of them with incredulity, but then it all made sense.
Ten put his glass on the table behind him, and put his hand in Johnny's palm that he was offering.
“I hope you dance as good as you handle a fight.”
The sneer Donghyuck emitted echoed Johnny's slight embarrassed cough.
“Please enjoy the night, Sir Donghyuck,” Ten managed to say, before following Johnny in the middle of the dancers.
Donghyuck followed them with his eyes, and his eyes looked at the sea of dancers while he was alone with his drink. There not only were Johnny and Ten dancing together now, but Jeno and Jaemin had not left each other and were enjoying another music together – Jeno arbored his eye smile that was hard to get from him if you weren't close. Obviously, his friend was enjoying his free night, as he was supposed to when the palace organized a ball with this big scale and number of guests.
And then Donghyuck's eyes caught another couple, and this time it was Mark and Lucas.
Lucas was the last suitor to dance with Mark, and Donghyuck could see that it didn't mean anything bad to be the last one to share a dance. Mark was glowing, looking small next to Lucas, but not at all weak nor overshadowed. Lucas' bright smile was contagious, and the both of them shared a precious moment there.
It was obvious they knew each other so much better, after weeks being close easily through the competition, the trials and the times spent together. Donghyuck had no idea at what frequency they actually met, what kind of conversations they had, but Mark seemed glad and so Donghyuck could only believe that it were precious moments for his best friend. Lucas had made his way through Mark's heart and maybe it wasn't love, but a spark was there and Donghyuck didn't know what to do of it. If he should continue to look at it, despite the sadness that he felt – despite everything he had promised to himself, his own heart wasn't made of steal, and a promise as big as not hurting whatever Mark's decision was, was a bit utopian to keep. Donghyuck had to accept the ache, too, or else it would become an ugly feeling again, worse than jealousy on the spur of the moment. Mark deserved a best friend that could support him.
The sadness would maybe come back stronger later. But right now, even if Mark wasn't smiling so brightly at him, he tried to enjoy it, to tell himself that Mark's happiness in the competition, in what his life was about to become, was the most important.
It was the fourth trial and there was still time for the final decision, so Donghyuck couldn't assume too quickly. He had to calm his mind down and just live in the moment, preventing unnecessary sorrow, or at least keeping it at bay for later, if it was meant to happen, he wanted to protect himself a little bit longer.
Donghyuck danced with Jisung, who was a surprisingly really good dancer despite being all clumsy in normal time when it didn't come to his bodyguard duty; he even humored Doyoung, also joined Renjun at some point, and had another dance with Mark, a more jazzy one that didn't allow them to talk like their first dance, but that was a mood lifter. Focusing on gracefully moving his limbs and arms was a perfect way to stop torturing his mind.
The ball was going perfectly through the evening. It was a party that the palace would probably remember for a long time.
Donghyuck would from time to time check the big golden clock in the room, with its hands moving closer to midnight. The ball was still a trial, and as per tradition, Mark had to announce the three remaining suitors who would be allowed to take part in the fifth and last trial at midnight. Donghyuck thought with amusement of Cinderella, but they didn't have to flee out, even if two of them would lose.
The same trepidation that had taken the guests before Mark's entrance to mark the beginning of the ball, took the crowd once again, when only thirty minutes remained. Mark had been a delightful host to be with, and he had taken care of the five of them the best he could, equally spending time and words with each one of them.
You would think that nothing could go wrong, when everyone was in such a good mood. Since the beginning of the competition, weeks before, despite the inner questions that Donghyuck had and that had complicated his relation with Mark, the whole palace had been in a perfect atmosphere.
Donghyuck had forgotten one thing, though.
The suitor who lost against him during the duel, the one who dared saying harsh and unfounded things to him.
It was so easy to forget now that Mark wasn't mad at him anymore, but obviously that guy had not been a good omen at that time, and that night either, he wasn't.
Everything happened quite fast; Donghyuck was however faster, and that was what saved Mark from something worse.
The music was once again smoothly changing toward another rhythm, and Mark was walking toward a group of people that had waved to him for a little conversation. Jungwoo moved from his place on the side – never leaving Mark from his sight, but keeping a distance so Mark could enjoy dancing – with the intention of staying by his side. The few meters that Mark did without anyone in his close circle, however, had been what had been waiting for, because suddenly, out of the crowd, someone pounced on Mark with a sharp knife.
Donghyuck had not been far; he had been closer than Jungwoo. Knowing where Mark was in a room he occupied too was like breathing to him. And despite coming to the ball as a suitor, his bodyguard instinct overtook him, and he reacted like the machine he had learnt to become with the only purpose of protecting Mark, his best friend, but also the heir.
It was like all the guests gasped and screamed at the same time, creating a cacophony that even covered the music that had blessed their ears for hours. The change was drastic and frankly scary, but that didn't touch Donghyuck who had been the only one quick enough to understand the situation.
He had jumped toward Mark to protect him with his body, pushing him to the side to avoid him getting hurt and for him to be in a safer place, even if it was only a few meters away. In the same movement, he countered the knife pointed previously at Mark, with a swift hand that gripped at the murderer's wrist and twisted it without an ounce of guilt, almost delightful when he heard something crack and the guy whimper.
The knife dropped on the floor and it made a metallic sound that reverberated through Donghyuck's mind, void of anything irrelevant if it wasn't related to Mark's safety.
The guy was about to fight back, jerking his arm away, but Donghyuck's grip was strong and harsh, and the anger simmering in Donghyuck was transformed in rational thoughts to incapacitate any deathly tentative coming from an enemy.
It was like Donghyuck didn't see them, too focused, but Jungwoo, Jeno and Jisung came to help him, Jisung keeping Mark away and staying in front of him while Jungwoo grabbed the murderer in a headlock. By instinct, the later lifted his free hand to try to free himself, but Donghyuck was still neutralizing his other arm. It was already obvious he was in a bad position and couldn't fight back, but when Jungwoo put the guy down on his knees, Donghyuck dropped on his level and punched him in the face.
The dull sound it made, followed by an helpless cry, brought Donghyuck back to reality, and when he met Jungwoo's stare, he stood up again as if the floor was burning his knees.
Everything was going too fast, but his first thought was for Mark; he frantically turned his head to see him wobbly on his feet, and he rushed to him, looking for any injury or anything that would be enough of a reason for him to beat that guy more.
Except Mark's shaky breath and widen eyes that were roaming Donghyuck's face, he looked uninjured.
And while around them people were still terrified, while Jeno put away the knife, that Jungwoo and Jisung restrained the pathetic murderer and that additional security came through the grand door, Donghyuck lowered his head on Mark's shoulder, quietly, tiredly, relieved, and a single tear, from the fear he'd just lived, rolled on his cheek and dropped on Mark's shirt.
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Donghyuck closed the door behind him, silent. The day had been really weird, and he wasn't sure he had still got everything that had happened in such a little time.
The most important matter had been the attack the previous night during the ball. Thanks to Donghyuck and the other bodyguards' work, there had not been anyone injured, and it had not taken horrible proportions. Although shakened, none of the guests had been hurt, and Donghyuck hoped people were not traumatized. He had really tried to do his best not to do anything unnecessary and too violent, if you didn't count his punch that he had not been able to help.
Mark had hugged him after that. To reassure him that the anxious moment was over. Donghyuck felt a bit dumb, because it was his job – granted, he was currently a suitor, but you couldn't strip him completely of this duty that was so important to him.
He had not been the one to take care of the implication of this attack, however; that was someone else's business. All he knew was that, unfortunately as he had thought, it came from the rude – clearly, more than that now – suitor that had threatened him before. But the consequences could only be resolved with other higher ups versed in diplomacy and interior security to assure the royal family's safety, as much as the people's safety.
Donghyuck really hoped it wouldn't take more serious proportions, it had already been a lot and he didn't want Mark to go through more hard work. However, he knew it wasn't his place for now, and he had to trust the government.
What he could focus on though, was the competition. As it didn't involve lots of people and families anymore, it had not been cancelled entirely – it would have been impractical – but the last trial had been pushed at another date further away.
Donghyuck knew it because Mark had chosen him as part of the last trial.
Donghyuck was in a daze. Doyoung had just announced him the decision Mark had managed to make despite the events, and Mark had chosen the three last suitors to be able to compete for his hand, and Donghyuck was one of them, alongside Prince Lucas and Prince Jaemin.
Donghyuck had not seen anyone yet, he didn't know what Renjun and Yuta could feel either since they'd been eliminated, nor had he been able to congratulate Lucas and Jaemin.
He quite couldn't believe it yet.
There had always been a chance for him to be Mark's future spouse, but now that he was part of the fifth and last trial, this possibility felt stronger. Donghyuck's heart was full of a feeling he couldn't quite describe; to know that he'd made it that far, and that if he pushed himself a little bit more, maybe everything would be alright, everything would be possible, and he'd be the one holding Mark's hand at the end of everything. With his own love added in this scenario, it was a bit overwhelming, but Donghyuck embraced it.
He remembered how at first, he thought he was only participating to protect Mark's honor; how weird it was to imagine himself next to his best friend, fiancés. But also, how weirder and more painful it was to imagine Mark with someone else by his side.
Donghyuck visualized Lucas or Jaemin holding hands with Mark, smiling and showing gratitude to everyone congratulating them for their engagement. He tried to convince himself that the future would look different, because there was still a chance he'd be there.
The second unbelievable, startling yet really true news came to Donghyuck's ears later that evening.
He didn't want to share a big dinner with the others that night, as it wasn't mandatory and he instead thought of looking for Mark later that night, so he had decided to pass by the kitchens to fetch himself a light snack to bring back to his room. However, when he went down to do so, every person he met on his way was vehemently whispering with one another about something that Donghyuck didn't catch but could sense was important. At first, he assumed it was the attack from the last evening, but it quickly appeared the palace had already gone past it and something else had come up for them to gossip again.
He was used to people looking at him with curiosity, as if he could give them a show because he was a suitor, as if he could spill some stuff that would quench their thirst for juicy stuff. He didn't know what kind of drama they wanted to hear from him, but that evening, it seemed like they had found it by themselves.
And he was finally enlightened when one of the usual cook he conversed with in the kitchen asked him, right when he put his feet in the kitchen:
“So it's only Prince Lucas and you now, eh?”
Donghyuck looked at him, puzzled. He wasn't surprised everyone already knew Mark's choices for the last trial, but they were three remaining to compete, not only two.
“What? No, you forgot Prince Jaemin.”
“Oh, you haven't heard the news yet, have you?”
“What news?”
The cook bent toward Donghyuck and told him:
“Prince Jaemin has officially declared he's quitting the competition, after he's heard the news that Prince Mark has chosen him too for the last trial.”
Donghyuck knew news spread fast in the castle, but he was astonished for this one. It was understandable, though. Was there any suitor who withdrew from the competition at such a late time, so close from succeeding?
“Are you kidding me?”
The cook raised his hands.
“Only saying the truth!”
“But... why would he do that? Why would he quit?”
The other put on a conspirator demeanor, wiggled his eyebrows, and whispered:
“The rumors have it that Prince Jaemin has got another beau...”
Donghyuck's eyes widened.
Did it mean what he thought it meant?
Images from the ball came back – Jaemin asking Jeno out for a dance, looking fidgety but determined, shy and pleased at the same time. Even moments from other trials – how Jaemin had been tensed when Ten had heavily implied he wasn't falling for Mark and there was no problem in that.
Was it really...
“It is romantic that in the end, he's chosen his love over Prince Mark and the power he could have gained, if he'd ever been chosen,” the cook commented.
Donghyuck didn't really hear him, striked by the news, trying to process it, and above all of this, there was the worry for his friend, for Jeno.
Because it was Jeno, right? Jaemin had made this decision because he'd caught feelings for Jeno, didn't he?
Donghyuck had been so into his own feelings that he had not noticed the changes in his friend's life. He felt shitty about it, but at the same time, maybe Jeno had felt like he couldn't share it properly, because of the competition.
Damn competition, really. Donghyuck could only see it as a curse most of the time, with every stressful thing it brought them.
He didn't wait longer, waved goodbye at the cook, didn't bother to get something to eat, and went back to the chamber wings. The corridors were empty, as it was time to eat, but Donghyuck followed his instinct, and tiptoed to Jeno's bedroom, knocking on the door gently.
“Who is it?” he heard through the wood, comforting Donghyuck that Jeno was indeed in his room.
“It's Hyuck. Jen, can I come inside, please?”
In lieu of a reply, there were a few footsteps, and then a click sound; Jeno's tired expression greeted him when he opened the door.
“You heard the news too, heh?” Jeno scoffed, not even surprised, as if he'd accepted his fate.
“And you know I'm not here to judge,” Donghyuck stressed, because he didn't want his friend to feel guilty in front of him, that would be the worst.
Jeno shrugged, his usually strong stature sagging even more, and he went back to lay on his bed while Donghyuck closed the door behind him. He carefully went to the bed too, and sat at the edge of it.
He kept silence for a little while. Jeno was looking at the ceiling, lost in his own thoughts, and he was waiting for him to talk if he ever wanted too. Donghyuck didn't really expect anything. Only being by his friend's side was good enough; Jeno had not shut him down and that was good.
He wondered what was happening right at that moment, for Jaemin. And what about Mark? What were the advisors saying about the situation? Donghyuck couldn't remember any rule preventing Jaemin for doing what he did. For sure it made the whole palace gossip, but they were living for the drama; other than that, it wasn't critical. Compared to the attack, it looked pale.
It was a huge matter for Jeno, though, and that Donghyuck knew for sure.
“I didn't tell you, but I met up with Jaemin quite a few times, since he arrived in the castle,” Jeno suddenly said after a few minutes, and Donghyuck looked at him, allowing him to take his time to talk. Jeno sighed. “I would see him when I was on duty with Mark, too. And what was surprising at first was that, when he'd talk with Mark, he wouldn't act as if I wasn't there. If he asked a question, he'd also ask it to me, not only Mark. That was really... kind of him, not to see me only as a shadow. Mark liked that about him, too. How polite he is, with everyone.”
“When you were free from your trials, sometimes I'd see him around the castle when I wasn't on duty, and he'd come talk to me. At first I thought he was only joking, like I was a pastime good enough at the moment, and we talked about it with Jisung, because he was charming with everyone. It was weird because, well because Jaemin is– was a suitor. I couldn't understand why he'd seek my company instead of Mark's. The one he needed to charm wasn't me, yet I'd see him so much.”
“And then I found myself wanting to see him more, too, and to enjoy his conversation and his company. He was always so kind and respectful, and I would forget everything stressful with him.”
Donghyuck could sense Jeno's fondness through his voice.
“One thing led to another... I wasn't expecting the situation to evolve like this, but now here we are,” Jeno murmured, referring to the elephant in the room, to Jaemin's withdrawal, to the rumor he had someone else he liked, who was Jeno.
Donghyuck wondered how many people had connected the dots, had seen Jeno and Jaemin chatting together. It wasn't illegal, but it was huge to make everyone gossip.
“You know, I met up with him this morning. He told me he's been terrified, last night, and then he's blamed himself for thinking horrible things, because he was glad I wasn't on duty that night, but it was unfair toward Jungwoo. The situation has been dangerous for everyone, especially Mark, and he... he thought of my safety first.”
Jeno murmured that confession while embracing his folded legs, his chin on his knees, looking in front of him.
“We've all been shocked by the attack, but at the same time I can't blame him for thinking of the person he wants to protect the most. He... I–”
Jeno jerked his head up, looking distressed, looking lost, guilty. It was such new emotions to read on his delicate face, Donghyuck was a bit breathless.
“I like him, Hyuck. I like Jaemin and now he's quit the competition because of me even if Mark has chosen him as one of the last three suitors. He did this without even telling me. He's gonna get so many backlash and it's all my fault.”
Donghyuck had always known of Jeno as someone level-headed, strong for others and rational, always ready with a plan to deal with stressful situations. However, it didn't mean that Jeno could handle everything thrown his way; even more when it was related to heart matters. Donghyuck himself knew how painful it could be, to suddenly realize that their feelings were something hard to carry depending on the situation. Donghyuck wasn't perfect nor was he made of steal, but he was so grateful Jeno was opening up to him. They probably would not be able to soothe every single worry with words exchanged at that moment, but it for sure could alleviate a few burdens already.
Donghyuck came closer to Jeno and took him in his arms, stroking his back to soothe him a bit. Jeno was shivering against his shoulder, but he tightened his grip to ground him. Then, carefully, he chose his words to share them.
“You know what Ten has told us, once, and that I can't really forget? That the suitor also has the right to think of his own feelings. Jaemin has been more distracted as time passed, trial after trial, and now that I know what's going on, it's obvious he had a hard time keeping his own feelings at bay. If anything, I think it's a proof of much consideration for Mark, to stop before it's too late.”
“And it's not only about Mark, here. It's also about you, and your happiness. If you like Jaemin and that he likes you too, to the point of turning down the fifth trial, then I'd say that you should feel grateful and do your best to pursue that happiness. It doesn't mean you can't feel scared, but you're not alone in this, you know?”
Jeno nodded and snuggled closer to Donghyuck, still tired but also relieved now that he could share what had been hard on his mind. He didn't need answers, just someone to listen to him. Donghyuck could feel the change in his mood from when he had first opened the door for him. It was like a storm had passed, and despite everything being heavily wet, the sky was slowly becoming clear again, with the huge dark clouds disappearing.
“At least, you're only gonna compete against one person instead of two, now,” Jeno chuckled slightly.
“But what an opponent left,” Donghyuck replied with Lucas' kind eyes and bright smile in his mind. “Mark seemed to like Lucas so much.”
Jeno took several seconds to reply:
“Hyuck, you like Mark, don't you?”
There was absolutely no reason for Donghyuck to ignore this.
“Yes. And I know you all saw it before me, but I'm aware of it too, now.”
It felt good, to share it out loud.
“We were waiting for it. It was all fun and game until we realized how serious the competition actually was,” Jeno confessed. “We don't want you to be hurt, Hyuck.”
“I know you do, but the rules are the rules. I can't really do anything except participate in the fifth trial and see who Mark choses in the end.”
“He likes you a lot.”
“Yes, but is it enough for me to become his spouse?”
“You came so far in the competition. It must mean something.”
“I really hope you're right.”
As it was obvious Mark had never shared anything regarding his feelings, they couldn't be sure of anything, only assume. But Donghyuck didn't want to make assumption to later be crushed under reality.
“Any idea for the last trial?”
“A few...,” Donghyuck blushed, and Jeno noticed it.
“I bet you do have some ideas, after all, it's not everyday you can go on a date with Prince Mark.”
Donghyuck gulped.
Yes, the last trial was to go on a date with Mark. Just the two of them, to see if some sparkles erupted. Donghyuck had to plan everything, and surprise and entertain Mark, and hopefully make him fall enough so then Mark would chose him.
Easier said than done, Donghyuck thought.
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The sun was shining brightly, and all Donghyuck could think was thank god the weather had been right, because if not, all of his plans would have been pathetically ruined. He inhaled a big breath once to try to calm down his heart, but it wasn't really working. His brain couldn't stop reminding him what was planned for that same afternoon and who was supposed to arrive in less than five minutes. Donghyuck had no idea going on a date with someone was that stressful. It wasn't like he didn't know Mark, but the circumstances of their meeting was so new that he was stressing over it.
He had worked so hard to prepare the date, Doyoung had helped him to get everything he needed, he had been assured everything was perfect and safe and at the same level of his expectations. He had done everything he could regarding what he could actually have power over, but now was time for Mark to join him and actually enjoy – or not – his hard work. Donghyuck fidgeted with the hem of his thin white shirt; he was wearing beige short pants. It seemed really casual, but it looked good on him against his honey skin, he thought it looked refreshing. The most important part was that it was adequate for what he had planned for the date. He had noticed Mark to dress the same kind too so he wouldn't feel uncomfortable.
He hoped Mark liked the date. He hoped Mark had fun, would really relax himself that afternoon, under the sun.
Donghyuck had based his date idea on their numerous summer days, from all the years they had shared. Frankly, Donghyuck had been a bit (a lot) fed up by all these parties, this need to act too polite, to always mind everyone's eyes dissecting his every move. The trials had been crowded events, not an ounce of intimacy, always that damn étiquette above their heads, always that fear of doing badly, that need to do his utter most to secure himself a pass in the next trial.
Now that it was the last one, that there was an opportunity to finally unwind, to forget for a little while what all of this implied, to just spend time with Mark only the two of them, after so many weeks kept away from their responsibilities, Donghyuck wanted to get the most out of it. This freedom to plan something relaxing and intimate, to have no rules to follow – except Mark's safety, but that had always been a priority for Donghyuck that he didn't even have a hard time taking that into account – Donghyuck was so ready to enjoy his time with Mark.
And even if it was for the trial, even if he was a suitor, in that moment it felt a bit like he was only Mark's best friend, and that Mark didn't have the weight of the country on his shoulder – he wasn't the heir, but just Mark, Donghyuck's best friend, Donghyuck's love of his life. (He didn't know that, yet, maybe he'd never know even, but Donghyuck kept that fact for now in a warm place in his heart.)
“Hi, Hyuck.”
Donghyuck startled a bit, and turned his head toward Mark standing next to him with a peaceful and happy smile. If Donghyuck wasn't having a heart attack because of how cute Mark looked, he'd be having a heart attack because he had not been aware enough of his surroundings to be surprised that way, and that wouldn't do as Mark's bodyguard.
However, it wasn't the question at all here. Mark looked cute, looked absolutely stunning, with his cheeks caressed by the sweet sunrays, and Donghyuck had to tell him.
“Hi, Mark. Y-you look good, haha.”
Donghyuck widened his eyes at his pathetic compliment, at this little anxiety running through his veins because they were about to have a date and he was not used to it and he had missed Mark like that so damn much. It was a torrent of emotions all at once and Mark had only told him hi. Donghyuck was a mess and he needed to breathe and take his confidence back. If he made a fool of himself, nevermind, at least maybe it would make Mark laugh.
And indeed, Mark chuckled, and his smile widened.
“You look good, too. I wasn't sure if the clothes I have chosen were adequate for what you've prepared as you kept it a surprise, but seeing how you're himself dressed in I guess I'm in the clear.”
Mark was wearing a large white long sleeves shirt, that looked thin enough not to be bothered by how hot the weather was, and would prevent him from getting sunburnt. His short pants were black and stopped just above his knees. It was simple, really casual, but stunning on him nonetheless, and you could see the quality of the clothes from afar – Mark wasn't the heir of the country for nothing, with how much money he owned.
“Let's go?” he asked cutely while tilting his head on the side, his big eyes focused solely on Donghyuck, and Donghyuck cleared his throat and nodded.
He gripped the wicker picnic basket at his feet, and hesitated if he should take Mark's hand in his. After all, it was a date... The whole point of this was to make sparkles appear in Mark's heart, to make him fall enough so he'd be chosen as the final suitor, as the future spouse. So much pressure that Donghyuck was paralyzed for a few seconds, not knowing what to do next, until Mark presented him his open hand, a silent plea so they would hold hands.
Donghyuck's brain short-circuited. Mark wasn't the one supposed to make him die of too much feelings on the spot, during that date, but it was Mark and Mark always did that – being spontaneous and kind, the sweet gestures that made Donghyuck's heart melt – even when he wasn't at first too aware of his own feelings.
“Let's go,” Donghyuck replied, and he put his empty hand in Mark's palm.
Holding Mark's hand wasn't new, but the feeling he felt at that moment was. Before, it had always been casual, sometimes a bit mockering, other times soothing and needed. Now they held hands for the sake of holding hands, to feel the physical connection and feel closer.
You would think Donghyuck would use the opportunity of a date with Mark to leave the palace where so many trials had taken place; however, as he had planned, his idea came from his summer days spent with Mark, and since they were young, they were used to the castle garden. There was always this fond feeling they had to see the huge tree they had climbed many times out of adrenaline. Donghyuck lead Mark through the flowers and the trimmed arbustes while conversing gently, adamant on not telling Mark their final destination. Mark joked around, telling him there wasn't any novelty in staying inside the domain of the castle, but Donghyuck told him he'd like it nonetheless.
And when he saw Mark's sparkling eyes when they arrived at their destination, Donghyuck knew he had made the right choice.
He had no idea where Lucas would bring Mark – Donghyuck's date was the first – and he didn't want to stress over it, to make assumption and compare it with his own idea. What was important right now was to make Mark happy.
Donghyuck had brought him to the rather far end of the palace gardens, where people didn't usually go but that the both of them liked so much because it was void of people. The gardeners still took care of that part, but it was obvious that the concept of it was a bit more wild than the pretty and well-maintained lawns. Where they were now, there were thicker trees, a defined path that had wildflowers on the side, a bit more dusty but so pretty where the sun would play hide and seek with the shadows the tree branches would create. And at the end of it, a pretty clearing overlooking a river with clear water, surrounded by big rocks. Donghyuck could almost see their past selves in front of him, jumping from the biggest rock, following the current, looking for fallen flowers and for bizarre freshwater fish.
“Seriously, Hyuck?”
Mark let go of his hand, stepping toward the river; he acted like he couldn't believe it, but he was in awe, and that made Donghyuck really proud of his choice. Here, they were far from any responsibilities, and it was perfect to enjoy the time slowing down around them. The only thing they had to take care of was staying in the shadow trees made while the sun moved in the sky, if they weren't playing around in the water.
“You didn't ask me to get my swimsuit!” Mark realized and whined.
Donghyuck rummaged through the basket at his hand, and triumphantly showed him a bag that seemed to contain everything needed for an impromptu dive in the river.
“I got everything covered, who do you think I am, planning a date without the most important stuff needed?”
Mark laughed.
“So that what you were hiding in that basket.”
“I also got food, of course,” Donghyuck replied, choosing a spot where it was both shadow and sun, and got out the picnic blanket he had prepared where they could lounge on and put all the good food prepared.
He made a quick work to display everything, from kimbap and sandwiches to snacks to soda and fruits, and Mark let out a cry of victory when he spotted the container with the watery and sugary red fruit cubes.
“I don't need anything else, Hyuckie, you can go back to the castle and I will enjoy my date with this superb watermelon,” Mark said while he approached to take the box in his hands.
Donghyuck let out a cry of indignation.
“How dare you! After all the care I put into our date, you're cheating on me already, and with an inanimate thing at that?!”
Mark burst in laughters, and just like when they were children, continued to act silly, trying to get the box even if Donghyuck was gripping at it like his life depended on it. Soon enough, they were running around, not really minding about the watermelon pieces anymore, more about the feeling of freedom to be together and not worry about anything.
At some point, Donghyuck had cornered Mark between a rock and the river, and he approached Mark with slow steps, asserting his victory – what did he win? he didn't know, but it was exhilarating and hilarious, to be with Mark and just enjoy the moment – and Mark was looking at him, obviously thinking of what his best escape could be. However, Donghyuck quickly snatched Mark around the waist and lifted him up. Mark screamed, and secured his body by encircling Donghyuck's neck with his arms. The both of them were giggling, and Donghyuck spinned Mark around.
“What are you planning, Donghyuck?!”
But instead of a reply, Donghyuck walked toward the river, so close, and Mark trashed around half-heartedly, more amused than annoyed.
With Mark's warm body in his arms, Donghyuck put a naked foot in the water, then the other, and moved forward in it in such a way that not only him but slowly Mark as well were getting their legs, then their short pants, licked by the water.
“You couldn't have waited for us to put on our swimsuits?” Mark sighed, tightening his grip around Donghyuck's delicate neck.
“Well, now it's too late.”
And Donghyuck suddenly dropped Mark, who screamed and drowned entirely in the water, splashing droplets everywhere, while Donghyuck was laughing so much he bent forward and slipped, ending up completely wet just like Mark. When the both of them put their head above the water level, a single glance sufficed for them to giggle like two five-year-old all over again.
They played around in the water for a few more minutes, forgetting the food on the picnic blanket. The weather was so nice that the shock of the fresh water had not been that long and they relished in the cool feeling it brought. They went out of the river with their clothes dripping, more heavy on their skin and a bit uncomfortable. Mark didn't wait before stripping his upper body of his now transparent white long sleeve shirt, and Donghyuck whined but quickly got out the towels he'd prepared to distract himself and not be too flustered. It would have been the exact same view if Mark had actually put on his swimsuit, he didn't have to act weird like this.
Donghyuck threw his towel to Mark, who whined but accepted it and first messily dried his hair before engulfing himself with it. Donghyuck put off his shirt as well, a difficult task since it clinged to his skin, but when he got it out he dried his torso with his own towel. Both their short pants were dripping droplets too, but with the sun they didn't care more. Mark put his towel next to the food displayed earlier and sat on it.
“Too hungry to properly change?”
“It's gonna dry with this weather. And anyway, we're going back in the water later, with actual swimsuits this time.”
Donghyuck quickly took both their shirts and spread them out on the close rocks instead of keeping them in a wet ball. Then it was time to eat, and that part felt familiar, that part they enjoyed just as much.
Donghyuck had had help from the palace cooks, but he had participated in the confection of their feast. Mark seemed to enjoy the food very much, and they fell into a conversation that was easy and never-ending. Donghyuck felt so happy he got to bask in the moment like that; to ignore the outside world for an entire afternoon, to see Mark smile, to see him not caring if he was talking while munching on his food, to see him sprawled on the blanket with messy wet strands in every direction. That was the Mark he liked the best, because it was a facet of him he didn't show anyone else, or just a few close ones.
When around the end of their lunch Mark was about to get the watermelon, Donghyuck snatched the box before him, and got a fork to seg it into a fruit cube. He hesitated a second before looking at Mark who was already staring at him, and then Donghyuck smirked and put on a baby voice and said:
“Markie, the food plane is on its way!”
And then he made arabesques in the air with the fork, leaning toward Mark to feed him the watermelon. At first Mark was stunned, but then he rolled his eyes with a scoff and played along. That made Donghyuck really happy, who squealed and added some exaggerated plane sounds before finally feeding Mark when he had opened his mouth. The game was silly, they knew it, but it was also fun and they couldn't help but giggle because of the situation. Donghyuck did it a second time, but this time tricked Mark and instead the watermelon ended up in his own belly, which made Mark cry of injustice and try to get the fork from Donghyuck's hand.
Their playful wrestle ended up with Mark on top of Donghyuck, successfully paralyzing him so he could get the fork out of his hand. The position, however, was a bit compromising, and they both realized that when their eyes met after a litany of complaints from Donghyuck.
But where Donghyuck froze and his heart rate sped up, Mark simply smiled, soft, and he leaned quickly to drop a kiss on Donghyuck's cheek, before he backed off and sat cross-legged. His smile was still there, if not with a hint of pink on his cheeks.
Donghyuck was certain he was crimson.
But Mark was playing it casual, so Donghyuck didn't comment on his gesture, and sat again as well, looking toward the river to try to calm himself a little bit. The softness of the peck Mark just gave him still lingered on his skin, and it tingled as much as it tingled in his chest. It had been nothing but soft, and cute, and he was surprised such a little thing would make him feel like his heart was expanding and floating like a helium balloon.
He felt happy, and he hoped he felt like that for the rest of his life.
Mark ended up eating most of the watermelon, and then they both lied down with their belly full of good food. The unspoken decision was to relax for a little bit before putting on their swimsuit and enjoy the river again.
Mark scooted closer, and out of habit, Donghyuck put his head on Mark's shoulder as a makeshift pillow for their quick nap. He felt Mark's hand caress his arm, and then they entangled their fingers without a word. Just like that, they closed their eyes, and enjoyed the sun and the soft breeze.
When he woke up from their dozing off quality time, Donghyuck noticed how his body had turned toward Mark, how his arm was haphazardly thrown over his chest. He silently rose and stood up, looking at the soft and serene face of Mark. Like that, he looked like a normal boy who just turned twenty, not like the heir of the country. Donghyuck liked this look on him, because it meant he was tranquil and not drowning under too much work.
Donghyuck went to put on his swimsuit hidden behind a tree, and then woke up Mark by poking his cheek. The soft whine coming out of his mouth was too cute for what it was supposed to be, but Mark finally went to change as well and joined Donghyuck in the water.
The rest of the afternoon was spent like that: between swimming and drowning each other in the water, tanning on the rocks, eating other snacks that had been prepared. It was so carefree, simple and perfect, and Donghyuck was so proud that not once Mark had seemed bored.
And when the sun declined and it was time to go back to the castle, Donghyuck had one hand gripping at the picnic basket and his other hand delicately holding Mark's during the whole walk back.
“Thank you for today, Hyuck, I had a lot of fun,” Mark said with sparkling eyes.
Donghyuck smiled. Their date had gone so smoothly that he had forgotten how stressed he had been. Mark had been nothing but a delight to be with, and Donghyuck couldn't even count the number of times he had felt like the intimate moments they shared meant so much not only for him, but for Mark as well.
He allowed himself to hope a little bit harder.
Mark thumbed the back of his hand and then bent to kiss, for the second time that day, Donghyuck's cheek, right on one of Donghyuck's moles.
“Have a sweet evening, Mark,” Donghyuck mumbled, unable to peck Mark back.
Mark smiled, let go of his hand then waved at him until he wasn't in sight anymore, going back to his room.
Donghyuck let out a long enamoured sigh, lucky that no one else saw him melting right on the spot after the date spent with Mark.
Now was time to go back to the kitchen to clean what they had used, and if he had a silly and hopeful smile on his lips the whole time, no one commented on it but everyone could guess easily how the date went.
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The fact that Donghyuck had actually nothing to focus on, as the date with Mark had passed, was a bit unsettling. He had been so used to have to always think of the next trial to happen, that he was slightly indigent. The main thing that had to happen now was Mark's decision, and that was the next day.
Right now, Donghyuck knew that Mark was on his date with Lucas. As much as jealousy liked to eat a part of his heart, he hoped Mark had fun. Lucas had seemed really enthusiastic with what he had prepared, and Donghyuck didn't know what it was, but he had heard that the both of them had left the palace to head to town in the middle of the afternoon. Donghyuck couldn't deny that Lucas was a good person, but there still was this selfish thought, that Mark had liked his date with Donghyuck enough to not be swept away from him in favour of Lucas'. Mark had dropped a few hints that he had enjoyed this intimacy with Donghyuck, right? He had not said a word, but in his eyes, Donghyuck thought he was able to read something deeper, something fond and promising.
He only hoped he was right.
He maybe had acknowledged his own feelings, but he still had not expressed them properly – even if the competition in itself should be a good hint – and neither had Mark. If Donghyuck passed this last trial as well... He wanted to talk with Mark with everything that it implied from his side. Mark didn't have to finish the competition by being totally in love with his chosen spouse, but Donghyuck was certain stronger feelings could come out. They had to, right?
Mark had to feel a little something for him, didn't he?
Donghyuck had spent the entire day trying to focus his mind on something that wouldn't make him feel anxious for Mark's final decision. The consequences would actually be so big that it scared him, but he couldn't act on it, so he knew it was helpless to torture his brain over it. He had gone to see Johnny, Doyoung, even bother Jisung, and got a glimpse of Jeno and Jaemin together in the garden, but he didn't go see them as they seemed in their own peaceful bubble. At least there was a good outcome of this competition; he was happy for his friends, and a bit curious of how they'd planned their future.
When the sun set, Donghyuck thought he'd be able to go to sleep early, but trashing in his bed for thirty minutes or so with no trace of fatigue wasn't the solution, so he decided to get some fresh air instead.
Maybe he shouldn't have.
The night was clear and Donghyuck took a back door to go out, with the plan of walking around the chambers aisle as it was calm and illuminated. He took his time, walking slowly along the building to then reach the courtyard in front of the main door. When he turned around the corner and finally saw the stairs leading to the entrance, he stopped before he himself was in the light of a lamppost nearby.
In front of the stairs stood Mark and Lucas, apparently now back from their date.
Realizing it was kinda late made Donghyuck question it; was their date so much fun they didn't see the time pass? Where did they go? Another instinct kicked in and it was to wonder if Mark's security had been kept a priority the whole time. Obviously everything had been fine, as they came back from town.
It was weird to see Mark there, with Lucas looking at him with such a fond expression. Donghyuck thought of how the previous day, it had been him in Lucas' shoes. It hurt a little bit, that Mark had lived that moment twice, and not with the same person. It was the rules of the competition, but Donghyuck's feelings came in the way of his rational thinking and it hurt a little bit to accept.
Then it felt like he was pushed underwater.
It was far from the easygoing and exhilarating feeling from the day before, when he was playing around with Mark and they would enjoy the freshness of the river.
Right now, it felt more like a big wave he had not seen coming, drowning him in the deep and salty ocean. How heavy and murky the water was, pushing against his eardrums, preventing him from gulping for air.
Before his eyes, Lucas leaned down, and instead of kissing Mark's cheek, he kissed him on the mouth. Now Donghyuck wasn't a prude, but another guy was kissing the man he loved, and that felt like a nightmare.
It became worse when Mark didn't step back, and instead put his hand on Lucas' arm. Lucas' hand was slightly caressing Mark's cheekbone, a gesture delicate and that was so full of obvious fondness that Donghyuck felt like he was intruding a moment no one had the right to see.
Lucas and Mark were kissing.
That was so ridiculously simple and yet Donghyuck felt like his hope drowned just like him, never to be seen again. How could he think for a single second that he had a chance against Lucas? Mark had only kissed Donghyuck on the cheek, with always this hint of amusement in his eyes. That had been to humour him, a gesture that didn't hold much, that was normal between best friends. Mark didn't kiss him on the mouth at all, but he was responding to Lucas' kiss right now. That meant something.
He didn't know how long it lasted, but Lucas detached himself from Mark, with this never-ending smile he always arbored, a bit shy now. He said something that he couldn't hear, too faraway, Mark replied and then he waved goodbye and went up the stairs to enter the building.
Donghyuck quickly disappeared before Lucas left and could see him. He didn't want to go back inside, though, because what if he bumped into Mark in the corridors? Mark, with rosy cheeks and shining lips from his kiss with Lucas? Donghyuck didn't want to hear about the date, didn't want to have to look at Mark so soon after his hopes had been crushed so fast.
So Donghyuck walked to the usual place that calmed him down. The place that didn't change despite how fast he himself changed, how fast his life evolved into things that he wouldn't have imagined years ago. The big tree of his childhood was still standing tall and majestic, unbothered, and he sat down right at its foot, feeling its old and rough bark against his back.
Time passed at a weird pace when you were hurting. Donghyuck didn't know how long he spent under the tree, sobbing and crying like a child, like the child he remembered he was, so young and unable to understand what was happening around him when he first arrived in the palace. How lost he had felt, until he met Mark, who unlike the adults, wasn't talking about him like he wasn't in the room. Even at that time he was wary of Doyoung, his own new older brother even if not by blood, but with Mark it had been easier. Donghyuck realized that he owed Mark so much, that it wasn't him who protected Mark since the beginning but the other way around. Without even doing an effort, Mark had always been what Donghyuck had needed in his life.
And now Mark was going to need another person in his life. Because it was clear, right? He had chosen Lucas, didn't he?
Donghyuck realized he had not been prepared for the hurt he felt; how hollow his heart seemed to have become, now. As if he could try to fill it with his endless tears but there was no way he could success. It felt like his world was shutting down, as dramatic as it sounded, but what else could he feel? With the fact that he'd never be Mark's other half shoved into his face like that? Donghyuck thought he would be mature enough to accept whatever the outcome was. It had been simpler in his head; he wasn't expecting so many waves of deep sadness to wash through him, now that his future seemed so much duller than what his hope had painted for him previously.
Mark's happiness was the most important, but right at that moment Donghyuck thought it was so unfair that Mark's happiness didn't imply Donghyuck's as well; he thought he would be so good to Mark, too. He'd work so hard for Mark to never feel like he was a burden, never feel like the whole world was crushing him. Donghyuck was certain he could bear it, for Mark, if only Mark loved him too.
He stayed under their childhood tree for so long, unaware of his surroundings, that he startled when a soft voice called his name.
“Donghyuck?”
Donghyuck froze and his heart beat faster out of fear. He didn't want Mark to see him so devastated. He thought he'd have more time to get ready to see him again, once it was official that Lucas was Mark's fiancé, future spouse, the winner of the competition. Donghyuck wanted to have that night to embrace his hurt and then build himself up again.
Last time they'd been the both of them here, it was Mark who was crying. Why did they continue to hurt each other without knowing it? Donghyuck was tired.
Donghyuck didn't reply, hiding his head in his arms, using the night and the shadows to hope that Mark had seen none of his tears. Mark didn't comment on it, but Donghyuck heard him sit, a few meters away from him, leaning against the tree too. The tree trunk was so old that it was really wide, hundred of years of wisdom looking at them, lost and dramatic young people.
“You can't sleep because of tomorrow either?” Mark whispered.
Donghyuck wondered why now there was a bit of anger too mixed in him, and he hated himself for that. He hummed an answer, not a yes nor a no.
“Lucas brought me to the fairground going on in town. It was really fun.”
Out of reflex, like a wounded animal, Donghyuck wanted to reply with a harsh comment – that he didn't care, that he didn't like Lucas, anything. However, he knew he'd regret it, that it was only an automatic reply from his brain, and he kept his mouth shut and gulped down the anger and the jealousy, the sadness.
They stayed silent for a few minutes, Donghyuck keeping everything in him, Mark's presence as soothing as it was hurting.
“I hope you're taking care of yourself even when I'm not here, Hyuckie. The whole competition has been stressful, but it's finally coming to an end,” Mark whispered.
Donghyuck was certain Mark was aware that Donghyuck wasn't in the mood for talking and wasn't feeling well, even if he didn't know the reason was that he had seen him and Lucas kiss. The consideration Mark had for him, for his health and well-being, choked him a little. How could he hate Mark, despite the circumstances?
He'd try to be strong enough to accept his defeat tomorrow.
Mark stood up quietly, considerate.
“Don't stay up too late, Hyuck.”
And then Mark left and went back inside the palace.
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Today was the day.
Mark had waited for this day since before the competition had even begun. It was like he had been an impatient kid, and that was a lot to say as there had been his birthday that was the origin of all of this. Mark couldn't really say this birthday had been his favourite so far; too many things happening in such a little time.
He replayed in his head every moment he had lived, putting a name on every person, recalling the feelings on every situation, every word. He had tried to stay focused, to analyze everything, to think through the smiles and the compliments, to estimate what would be the best, for him and the country. He had gone through the competition with the mind of a heir, not really with the mind of someone who was looking for his second half.
And today it was finally coming to an end. This stressful time, that had brought them tears between pleasant moments, was about to end with Mark's final decision for his future spouse.
He had woken up early, dressing with what had been prepared for him, a simple and immaculate white suit. It contrasted a lot with the bouquet of flowers he had to give the final suitor he wanted to marry. Compound of red salvias, yarrows, white ivies and red roses, the white and red composition contrasted with the last flower he had asked to be added to the traditional and official bouquet that every heir before him had given their chosen one.
Mark had looked up the meaning of each flower: the ivy represented friendship, but also fidelity and marriage. Mark was convinced a healthy relationship had to be based on the fact that both the parties loved each other as friends to share their everyday worries and joy, just like they loved each other like lovers, to spend their life together. The other flowers meant an everlasting love, as well as “forever mine”, a promise of having done the right decision.
Mark thought it was a bit extreme and old-fashioned to ask a twenty-year-old to make this kind of decision that had to be followed for the rest of his life. However, he was certain of his choice, after everything that had happened during the competition, the new realisations and constant questionings to make the right choice. Mark had been raised to be serious in his decisions and to always mean it, always look for the best in everything and protect what he cared for. It was with that in mind that he had come to his final judgment.
Someone knocked on his door, and he opened to Jungwoo. It meant it was time to go.
“Nervous?” Jungwoo asked with a gentle smile.
“A little bit,” Mark admitted.
He hoped he would hurt no one, or at least, that the pain wouldn't be too much. After all, he couldn't avoid choosing someone in the end.
Just like the dates, the official decision wasn't a moment that was shared in front of a big crowd. Donghyuck and Lucas both were waiting each in a different room, and Mark would make his final choice by going inside the room of the suitor he wanted as his spouse.
It was only later that the name of his chosen one would be announced officially. There was still this humanity in the competition, this place for a bit of intimacy that Mark was so thankful for.
They went down the stairs to head to the other aisle that contained too many unnecessary rooms, if you asked Mark. However, for the competition, it was clearly convenient.
He bowed toward Doyoung and Lucas' intendant, who were both waiting in the corridor in front of the rooms where their protégés waited. The small committee didn't really reduce Mark's restlessness. There was still this fear in him, to be judged for his decision, to create animosity between families even if it was in the name of love. It was some unfounded doubt that he couldn't help but think of – not so unfounded if you thought of the trauma it had been to be attacked during the ball, but Mark knew the matter had been entirely taken care of now. Everyone going into the competition knew that it was only fair that the winner had to be accepted like he deserved to be.
“It is time, your Highness.”
Mark tightened his grip on the bouquet of flowers in his hands. He looked at the two doors facing each other, where there was Donghyuck behind one and Lucas behind the other. Even if his decision was thought through, there was still these few seconds where he thought of the both of them, of these two suitors who had made it this far in the competition. Now he was about to mark the end of all of this and a new chapter would begin.
He took a deep breath, and walked toward the door. He delicately touched the handle, lowered it, and walked inside the room, closing the door behind him gently.
There was no going back now.
The room was pretty; the fine tiling was white, just like Mark's suit. The walls were a delicate soft yellow, and the furniture all in light wood. The round table was illuminated by the rays of sunshine passing through the large french window, as well as the two chairs surrounding it.
And in one of the chairs, here he was, waiting, a bit tense, with his delicate hands folded on his laps.
Mark's love of his life.
He was looking at Mark as if he couldn't quite believe he had entered this room; as if to him, it wasn't evident that Mark would chose him over anyone else. Mark's heart beat faster, but he didn't falter. He walked toward him, with assurance in his steps.
The single sunflower Mark had added in the bouquet shined when the sun caressed its petals as well, and it faced Donghyuck like a perfect mirror.
“Hi, Donghyuck,” he greeted, a bit lame, because suddenly he felt shy under Donghyuck's eyes, even if he was sure of himself.
Donghyuck looked like Mark was something out of his imagination; his hands were slightly trembling, his mouth open on words he wanted to let out even if he didn't know which ones.
“What– why–” he finally gasped, and it was a bit funny so Mark allowed himself to smile.
“Why am I here?” he finished the sentence for him. “Isn't it obvious?” he chuckled.
“It's the day of your... final decision...,” Donghyuck stated, and with each word his voice was weaker, as if his thoughts took over and his brain was trying to understand.
Mark began to be a bit panicky because Donghyuck didn't seem that happy to see him; it was like he was keeping himself from what was really happening, as if something was stopping him. He put for later the words he truly wanted to tell him, and instead asked him if everything was okay. After all, Donghyuck's well-being had always been on top of Mark's priorities, and if he could soothe his worries about anything he'd try to do it.
“You're here, and not with Lucas,” Donghyuck murmured, looking pained, “but... But yesterday, I saw you with Lucas, when you came back from your date, and he... you...”
Mark's eyes widened, understanding the situation even though Donghyuck was stuttering; understanding why Donghyuck was surprised that Mark had entered his room instead of Lucas'.
It suddenly hurt, to know that his action from the previous day had put Donghyuck in this state of ache, while he was unaware of it. Mark didn't want to keep it a secret, as for him it didn't mean anything, and that he wanted to be transparent to Donghyuck. He had planned on telling him later, but now that it was obvious Donghyuck knew, because he had been an unwilling spectator, Mark wanted to do everything to erase Donghyuck's pain and worries.
Because Donghyuck found it important, then Mark would too.
“Don't look at me like that and please explain,” Donghyuck stressed, and through his words Mark sensed his pain.
He sat in the chair next to Donghyuck, put the bouquet on the table, and delicately hovered his hand over Donghyuck's, a silent question if it was okay for him to touch him. Donghyuck didn't flinch away and nodded almost imperceptibly, so Mark took it as a yes, and caressed Donghyuck's clenched hand, rubbing with his thumb against his smooth palm to try to soothe him a little bit. Not once had he stopped looking into Donghyuck's eyes.
Mark knew that for some people, a kiss didn't mean anything, even more when nothing official had been stated between two people. However, he also knew that for Donghyuck, it meant a lot, and he could only imagine how betrayed he must have felt to see Lucas and him kiss, while a day before he had only spared a few pecks on the cheek to Donghyuck. If he put himself in Donghyuck's shoes, he could understand the disbelief and the assumptions. It was for sure not Mark's proudest moment.
He exhaled deeply and tried to find somewhere to begin, because he knew he wanted to say a lot, not only about the kiss.
Mostly about everything else, to be honest.
And so Mark began:
“Donghyuck, I want you to know that I am serious when I'm telling you that my feelings for you are there since years. You've been by my side since as long as I can remember, and you were always such an example for me, even if it's me who's the heir. You taught me to always be proud of myself and do my best, because you told me you will always be there for me to protect me and allow me to achieve what I want. I can't explain how proud I am of you, who always did your best and more, just so I could laugh a little. There's not any moment where I was more proud than when I could talk about my best friend's achievement, your achievements. To other people you may seem like a simple bodyguard, but I always tried to make sure no one belittled you because of a dumb status. I know it's ironic coming from me, to say that status don't matter even if it allows me to be where I am today, but for you it has always been different, Hyuck.”
“And as much as I loved talking about you, about my best friend, at some point calling you best friend didn't seem fit to me, because our relationship is something that is so much more for me. Even before the competition, especially since before the competition. If there is something that I regret a little, it's how I acted the months before my birthday. I acted like I was fine, that I was following the rules and the hundred years of tradition without a problem, but I was hiding from my feelings with the excuse of what my parents and the country wanted me to do. I wanted to be honest so badly, but I was also so scared that it would lead to more ache than anything, that I would destroy what we had, because the competition was supposed to lead me to my future spouse, and never once was it planned that you would take part in it. I didn't want to be selfish and hurt you.”
“So when you actually put your name on that list, I had a tiny hope that began to light up again, that maybe now there was a chance for us, even if I never told you anything about what I truly felt about you. And I couldn't help but feel selfish, feel a bit out of place; I had all those suitors coming to compete for my hand, and I couldn't not acknowledge them and their work either, because it would have been unfair. I was so scared that people would begin to caught on my true feelings and understand that you were clearly a favourite, so I responded – maybe dumbly – by spending time with the other suitors more... and less with you. I don't say it was a chore, of course. Almost everyone was lovely, and that led me to also especially know Jaemin and Lucas better...”
“As I said, I'm not trying to justify myself. It just happened that Lucas and I are apparently good friends too, and... and at the end of our date, Lucas did what he thought fit in that kind of situation. I can't blame him for that, but I can blame my reaction. I didn't reject him because I wondered if his kiss made me feel a tiny bit the same as being with you makes me feel.”
Mark tightened his grip around Donghyuck's hand, as if he was scared he would reject him; strong enough to talk but not enough to act as if everything was fine if he was really disregarded by his best friend – or more accurately, the man he loved.
“And that's true that it wasn't fair to you nor to Lucas. I realized it wasn't what I wanted. Hyuck, I want you to believe me when I say that to me, this kiss doesn't mean anything. When we had our date, just the both of us, when I had enough courage to actually enjoy to the fullest my feelings for you, even if I didn't confess yet, that was honestly one of the happiest moments I've ever had. You were the brightest, and you didn't stop for a single second to make my heart beat so fast. I... I didn't want to actually kiss you if I didn't know beforehand what your true feelings are, as well. I didn't, I don't, want to take advantage of you, whatever the situation we are in. If you feel obligated to accept me and my feelings because of the competition, please don't. Donghyuck, I love you, truly, since so long, and–”
“You're such an idiot, Mark,” Donghyuck sobbed a little. “A real, real idiot.”
Mark was dumbfounded at Donghyuck's interruption, not really sure what he meant by that. But then he felt Donghyuck thumbing the back of his hand as well, a soothing gesture that went both ways. Donghyuck looked at him as if he had hung all the stars in the sky, as if it was Mark who had put dutifully each little mole on his cheeks and his neck with kisses – and Mark wanted to kiss each one of his moles so badly, to worship Donghyuck just like he'd imagined so many times.
“Mark, I'm sorry I took so long to realize it, I'm sorry you had to go through all of this without me by your side to help and protect you, but now I'm here. Last night I thought none of my feelings mattered, and I've been hurt for sure, but now... Regardless of what happened, I can't erase what I feel for you so quickly. When I entered this room this morning, I thought I'd leave it alone, but now I know that it's not true and that you'll be here with me. Please never doubt me when I say that I love you, too, from the deepest part of my heart.”
It was like time had stopped between the two of them. Mark couldn't really realize that Donghyuck had truly said those words, the ones he wanted to hear the most coming from him.
It felt a little bit like a fairytale, but Mark was a prince, so a fairytale was kind of the reality for him, wasn't it?
“Donghyuck,” Mark whispered, and he messily left his chair and bent a knee in front of Donghyuck, with the bouquet presented between them. “I love you, so, so much. Would you– would you give me the honor of accepting to be my fiancé and future spouse?”
Donghyuck covered his mouth with one of his hands, almost in disbelief even after everything, while his other hand was about to brush the flower petals, but too shy in the last moment Donghyuck stopped his movement. His eyes went from the bouquet to Mark's eyes, and Mark could see in his eyes how he was trying to keep his tears at bay.
He for sure wasn't in a better state, choked up in emotions, when Donghyuck answered a breathless yes. Mark was about to hand him the bouquet, but Donghyuck, faster, took it into his hands, put it on the table next to him, and instead of admiring the flowers, he kneeled on the ground as well and threw himself in Mark's arms, encircling his shoulder with the strength of someone who didn't want to let their purest dream escape from them.
Donghyuck embraced Mark like his life depended on it, and messily he repeated that single word, yes, yes, yes, so many times, each one of them interrupted by a kiss he would peck on Mark's face. Mark giggled, putting his arms around Donghyuck's tiny waist, still not quite believing what was happening after weeks, months, years of yearning.
And then Donghyuck locked his eyes with Mark's, and for a few intense seconds, they looked at each other as if it was the first time they really realized what all of this meant. And in those pregnant seconds, the pull between each other was obvious; they leaned toward each other like two magnets trying to reunify, and after what felt like forever and not even a millisecond at the same time, their lips touched, and they kissed with all the emotions they were feeling.
It was the first kiss they shared ever. Mark could feel how soft and sensitive Donghyuck's lips were, how eager and perfect they felt against his own. He could feel how alive they made him feel, how tingly and warm. He could hear Donghyuck's soft sighs, each time he moved his lips, each time he bit them softly, each time they moved their head to deepen the kiss. Especially with how messy it was, when their noses would bump, when Mark would gasp for air again; they could only register how perfect this first kiss, and all of the others that followed, felt.
˚̩͙⚛ ͙*̩̩̥˚̩͙⚛ ͙*̩̩̥˚̩͙⚛ ͙*̩̩̥˚̩͙⚛ ͙*̩̩̥
The sun was still shy, barely awake and lazily spreading its rays just like it would stretch its arms if it just woke up in its bed. The lawns were still beaded with dew. There only were the early birds who were chirping from a branch to another, welcoming the new special day with their peeps, as if they were discussing the festivities planned for the day, gossiping over what they expected to see happening.
Donghyuck was part of the early birds, but he kept silent with a deep and relaxed smile on his face. Barefaced and barefoot, he enjoyed the fresh air of the morning, relishing how soft the grass was, tickling his toes. His walk brought him to pass just next to the forever standing tall, almost timeless, tree that dotted so many of his memories; he effleured its rough skin with the tip of his fingers. When he decided to follow the actual path to go deeper in the gardens, he took a few seconds to put on his light sandals and then walked again.
It was a bit unsettling to take a path he had not taken since quite a long time, and it made him think of the last time he had actually used it. It made his smile fonder, because there in his memories, he saw Mark with his hand in his own, shy and delighted and relaxed. Donghyuck couldn't wait to hold Mark's hand again today, and that thought made his heart beat stronger, as well as anticipation rise from the bottom of his chest.
The wildflowers on the sideway were pretty, and Donghyuck picked up a few and tressed them together while walking slowly, not in a rush whatsoever. He allowed himself this simple happiness, focusing his mind on crafting a little not so silly and quite cute crown, absorbed in his task to the point he almost didn't see when he arrived where he wanted to go at first.
The clearing looked right out of a fairytale, with how a low mist still lingered around and seemed to disappear once too close from the whisper of the river near it.
And near the river, next to another line of young trees, a figure sat still, relaxed, head thrown toward the delicate sun peaking at the horizon.
Donghyuck's smile became so big you could see his teeth, and he walked toward the person there.
“Good morning, my prince,” he chirped, and he sat next to Mark who turned his head from a sun to another.
Donghyuck lifted his hands and put the little flower crown he'd made on Mark's ruffled hair. That was his true fairytale, he thought, and then he chuckled and shook his head.
“Good morning, Hyuckie.”
Mark's voice was still a bit deep from sleep.
“What got his Highness so deep in the gardens on this fine morning? If Sir Doyoung knows about that, he'd pull out his hair and scold you for being so reckless.”
“Oh, but I am in such a luck that I'm in presence of my strongest and favourite bodyguard right now,” Mark replied with the same hint of fondness and playfulness.
Donghyuck shoved Mark in the shoulder.
“Did you think the tree would suddenly grow three meters tall in the span of a night?” he asked.
“Of course not, but I don't know, I wanted to look at it again. It's weird that it's not in our room anymore.”
Donghyuck's cheeks heated at the usage of our room. It's been months and yet sometimes he could still get giddy over little things like that. And there was bigger things to get giddy over still, today.
“The maple tree was taking too much place. Its roots need more space now, to extend and grow bigger.”
“I'm glad we got to plant it here together yesterday.”
“Me too,” Donghyuck sighed of contentment, “a pain to ask the advisors for even an hour of free time, but so worth it.”
“It's understandable. The whole palace is in a frenzy because of us and then the only thing we're asking is to go plant a baby maple tree in the back of the gardens.”
“Their faces were hilarious though.”
They both looked at the still quite little but going strong maple tree. In the span of around a year, it had grown a lot, under mostly Mark's care. Since Donghyuck had gifted the seed to him, he had always taken the duty of watering it, and now it showed pretty soft green leaves with pride. It was still a matter of years before it reached its adult height, but as Donghyuck had stated when he had offered the tiny seed, the journey of seeing it grow was something soothing.
Donghyuck snuggled closer against Mark, and Mark put his arms around Donghyuck's shoulder and hugged him. They stayed silent for a little time, just enjoying each other's presence, sometimes with Mark pecking Donghyuck's neck or cheek.
“Everything's done from your part?”
“With Doyoung's tendency to double and triple check and be an actual demon if something doesn't go his way, trust me, it's been a week everything's perfect and he's only nitpicking to forget he's really emotional his little brother is officially getting married.”
“We're lucky we have him to help organize everything,” Mark laughed.
“Yes, we are.”
Donghyuck thought of his older brother fondly; he remembered how actually teary-eyed and genuinely happy he had been, to see his little brother hand in hand with Mark. Donghyuck couldn't have dreamed of a better family.
“Jeno and Jaemin are arriving this morning, right?” Donghyuck asked for confirmation, thinking of all the guests that were coming to the palace.
“Yes, but to make up for coming so late, they'll stay a few weeks in the castle, so we can catch up on their whereabouts.”
“I'm so happy Jeno could join Jaemin, in the end. He got so many juicy news to tell me, it’s been so long.”
“You're never tired of this, are you? I remember you talked with Ten for a whole afternoon when he finally came back with Johnny after they went travelling for two months.”
“It's making me travel as well, even if I don't go out of the castle! That is so nice that they've been able to discover so many countries around the world. We've been quite busy and we haven't been able to go on a trip ourselves, so for now I'm living through them and their stories,” Donghyuck pouted.
“We'll see the world on our honeymoon, too,” Mark commented, with a softer tone that made Donghyuck raise his eyes to meet Mark's.
Donghyuck couldn't wait for that. He couldn't wait for the ceremony later that day either, to say yes, to kiss Mark in front of everyone, to be surrounded by all their friends – and the officials, too, but that was a detail – and he couldn't wait to see the maple tree grow more, to see Mark grow by his side, and to see their love grow, too.
“I can't wait,” he whispered, and Mark's stare sparkled.
Delicately, Mark took the flower crown Donghyuck put on his head, and with the softest gesture, put it on Donghyuck's hair. It laid prettily on his messy strands, wildflowers colorful and so tiny compared to the usual sunflowers he liked to gift Donghyuck, but beautiful nonetheless.
“I can't wait, either,” Mark replied.
And in the soft morning of their wedding day, in the intimacy of the garden, hours before the festivities, Mark leaned down and kissed Donghyuck for the thousand time.