Chapter Text
Sex & Surgery 3
The next time that Meredith Grey gets caught staring at Addison Montgomery from the gallery, she's not so lucky.
This time she's gotten caught by none other than Satan, herself.
"Dr. Grey, what are you doing here!?" Addison exclaims at the intern, who shrinks in awe of her boss (and also her crush)'s presence and attention.
"S-sorry, Dr. Montgomery-" Meredith begins, wringing her hands together worriedly.
Meredith freaks out a bit, wondering how much Addison may or may not have noticed her lurking and inappropriate staring and damn near stalking she'd been involved in during the past few weeks.
"It's been a month, and every time I schedule a procedure, I see you up in the gallery. It's like, you won't leave me alone. First of all, you steal my husband. Second of all, you get hit on by his best friend. And third of all, you sit there staring at me every time as if you just know I'm off of my game and you just can't wait to tell Bailey or Richard what a poor teacher I am. I can't get a break here, Grey, I just need a moment without you!" Addison begins.
Meredith's mouth drops open in shock when she realizes her presence has been noticed. The entire time in fact. And that Addison has attributed almost an entirely opposite reason to the truth as to why she's been so preoccupied with the red-headed Attending's O.R recently.
"Addison…" Meredith tries to cut in, but she's cut off sharply again by Dr. Montgomery.
"Dr. Grey, if I would even be addressing you as such when you insist on calling me by my first name. I've worked long and hard at this, I've trained and studied for years, I've become a resilient teacher, and I take on the tough cases. I'm tired, exhausted, in fact, and why can't we go back to when you stayed on 'three,' and I went back to 'two,' and when I just needed a moment away from you because every time I see you it makes my blood boil, and Goddamnit, Grey, I am hardly keeping it together here!?" Addison insists, as she gesticulates accordingly.
"Dr. Montgomery-…" Meredith shrinks again, hands now fiddling with nothing in particular to contain her nervous energy. "I am- I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to upset you, I didn't want to make you feel uneasy, if you don't want me to watch you anymore I won't, I just…" Meredith can't find the words so she just rambles on nonsensically in her head again.
"Say it, Grey. I'm a failure, I'm pathetic, and I'm standing here yelling at an intern because of my own marital explosions and insecurities. Gosh, I'll never get it together, now will I?" Addison sighs, hanging her head in accompaniment.
"No, no, you're not, you're not all that bad Addison, really," Meredith pushes through Addison's eyebrow-raise at being called only her first name again. "You see, you've had so many successful surgeries in the past month. You've beaten records, you've shown more to me friends. I mean, Cristina Yang's been even in here skipping off of Burke's service when you have a really unique cardio case. I- I'll go if you want me to go Dr. Montgomery… But I'm here because I want to watch you work your… Magic? Magic! Yes, that's it. Your- You're like magic in there…" Meredith says awkwardly and shyly, and then she bites her lip because she can't bear to look up to meet Addison's eyes again.
"Oh," says Addison, finally looking for Meredith's expression. "I didn't know, I'm sorry for yelling. I'm not even that pissed at you, I'm mad at Mark, I'm mad at Alex, I'm mad at Derek… God knows, I'm just angry and you happened to be in my way. It won't happen again," Addison offers.
"It's okay, Addison. I mean, I was sorta stalking you…" Meredith says barely above a whisper this time.
"RIght…" Addison squints to try to understand the blonde this time.
"Umm…" Meredith doesn't want to continue, and begins blushing furiously again.
"Wait, what's up?" Addison asks, suddenly concerned, but more so deeply confused at the surgeon's reaction to her.
"No, ah, never mind. It's inappropriate, it's too embarrassing. I'll ah, catch you later…" Meredith tries to brush past Addison to exit the room as soon as possible.
"Wait-" Addison catches Meredith by the arm, standing in front of her softly again, and then releasing her hand so that Meredith isn't restrained anymore. "You don't have to talk to me, you don't have to tell me anything you don't want to…" Addison begins, suddenly needing to make Meredith feel comfortable. "But why… Why were you stalking me?" Addison inquires, still completely oblivious.
Meredith as to resist the impulse to scream something back like 'I JUST REALLY WANT TO SEE YOU WORK THOSE HANDS WHAT'S THE BIG DEAL GET OVER IT.' and squirming under Addison's piercing gaze the same way that Addison had just been under hers.
"Look, I just… I just want to watch you, that's all," says Meredith. "I mean, it's my job, right? I'm a student, and you're an Attending, and we're both physicians, and you have interesting patients, and I should want to watch and so I do, and I notice things, and I notice you… So I watch you a lot. So I watch you until my vision gets fuzzy. SO A LOT OT THINGS!?" Meredith starts flailing her hands around vividly to accentuate that she has honestly no good idea or reason she's been staring at Addison Montgomery for the past actually six to eight weeks continuously.
"So, you're interested in maternal medicine, then, I gather…?" Addison keeps trying to be somewhat comforting at this point.
"I guess…" Meredith mumbles, not wanting to scream aloud 'oh, but honey, I'm much more interested in YOU….'
"Why do I sense that you're lying again?" Addison asks her, and Meredith's blue eyes cloud over again.
"Umm, sorry, I guess I was…" Meredith answers noncommittally. "I guess I was just… interested…" she concludes finally.
"In my work?" Addison tries again.
"Mostly…" Meredith squeaks out, then takes a big gulp of air, and then folds her hands over and over again.
"What else could you possibly be interested in?" Addison sighs, wanting to figure it all out once and for all at this point.
"Your ah, your fingers…" Meredith finally barely says under her breath for Addison, now.
"My fingers!?" Says Addison. "What kind of answer even is that?' She summarizes.
"Your fingers look, just, they're like you but a piece of you. Like, majestic, and stylish. Strong, complete, but effortless, and graceful like I'll never be, and they look so damn warm, and not too hot, and just nice to the touch. Soothing almost. Like, a patient would be really lucky to have you reassure them y'know?" Meredith tries to explain herself, hoping that Addison will finally get off of her back once she does.
"You just think I have nice fingers?" Addison asks her.
"Yes," Meredith offers.
"Oh," Addison responds to her.
"So I'm ah, I'm just gonna go now, if that's okay," Meredith tries to sidestep the redhead.
This time, Addison doesn't follow her, and allows her to pass by for the door.
Meredith can't help herself though, she turns around before leaving, and leans against the door, and says in as a confident voice as she can muster "I bet your hands are gonna make someone really satisfied someday, and I still can't figure out why McDreamy and/or McSteamy gave up on those perfect hands for anyone else, especially me, in the end," she offers. And then, Meredith allows the door to slide closed just as Addison's eyebrows shoot up to the ceiling, and her jaw drops practically to the floor.
Addison considers her ex-husband's ex-mistress' bold admission, and suddenly her 'perfect' hands aren't so steady anymore. This time, it's her turn to be nervous. It's her turn to feel butterflies. It's her turn to turn around and call out to Dr. Grey to see if she'll come back to keep watching her again.
It's not only for her ego, or her competition, or much less, her sanity.
It's for the pureness of Meredith's expression of her attraction to her, the symbolic person of her past hatred now aching for her making Addison ache for her back all inside.
"Wait, Meredith," Addison calls out hopefully, her 'attending physician's voice,' long gone, and her 'tender, silken, gracious,' voice emerging from the confines of her deeper being.
"Addison," Meredith opens the door again, revealing that she'd not walked past the entryway to the door after all.
"You have nice fingers also," Addison begins, walking a few strides to press her palm up against the intern's.
The feeling of their hands together like this ignites a strange sort of feeling in both of them.
The longing, the regret. The old, the new. The past, but also the hope for a future that's less of an uphill battle than before.
"I want to watch you, next time, if I may," Addison husks lowly, for Meredith to hear her subtext.
"Yes…" Meredith sees the flickers of desire forming in Addison's deep green eyes, which she's long since figured out are matched in her own.
"Will it be confusing, Dr. Grey, to be thinking about both sex & surgery at the same time?" Addison finally asks the blunt question aloud that's been thrumming in the air for eternity now.
"Hardly more now that I know that the feeling is mutual, Dr. Montgomery," Meredith practically growls for the first time.
"Would you like to know just what these hands can do, Dr. Grey?" Addison runs her hands with featherlike touches down Meredith's shoulders to illustrate this.
"Please," Meredith purrs under the attention and shivers at Addison's incredible skill at seducing her.
It's all of her fantasies forming right before her very eyes.
(As Addison nods in confirmation that these thoughts hadn't been all that one-sided after all).
"Alright then, let the lesson begin".
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***** END OF CHAPTER 3
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