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Take My Hand, Take My Whole Life Too

On one side of the dining table sat four grim-looking soldiers looking like they were about to give the man seated across from them the interrogation of a lifetime. Said man was Tony Stark and the soldiers had just saved his life.

Two of the soldiers were redheaded women and were frankly the scariest of the bunch. Pepper—her real name was Virginia which Tony just didn’t dig and so, he decided to call her by her codename Pepper even if she insisted that he wasn’t allowed to call her that—was their very attractive leader, captain of Company 12, one of the companies tasked to patrol and guard the demilitarized zone of North Titan. The other woman (also attractive but in a very deadly way) was called Natasha—codename: Widow—and Tony saw her in action when she took down his captors armed with only her fists. She didn’t trust him and Tony didn’t really blame her.  

The third soldier was a teenager named Peter whose codename was Spider. Peter insisted he was 18 years old but Tony didn’t buy any of that. The kid looked like a puppy and fifteen years old on his best day. He was probably the weakest link of the four if his love of South Titanian pop culture was anything to go by.

The last soldier was Rhodey. His codename was War Machine, but he reminded Tony a lot of a Chihuahua because he had a lot of bark against Tony for simply being from the rivaling country South Titan, but rarely had any bite in him for a follow-through.

Their leader, Captain Pepper, leaned forward, resting her linked hands on top of the table. “You do know why we’re gathered here, don’t you?”

Tony shrugged nonchalantly, determined not to make the soldiers think he was easy. He relaxed in his seat. “Of course, I do! You guys want to interview the Tony Stark. I get it. It’s not everyday you save a famous person.”

All four soldiers slowly looked at each other and then back at Tony.

The Chihuahua scoffed and said, “We’re not interviewing you. We’re interrogating you.”

“Semantics,” Tony said, waving him off. “I’ll save you guys the trouble of asking and start from the beginning.”

…

The beginning

“Come on, gentlemen. Let’s go see the damage our bad boys did, huh?”

The cloud of smoke rising from the distance told Tony that his weapons, as always, did its job. With a slight pang in his chest, he told himself that he only needed to close this final deal with the South Titanian government and his contract will be fulfilled. After that, he never needed to make another weapon again.

Tony climbed into the Humvee and quickly dialed Obadiah. His CFO/mentor picked up the call on the first ring.

“How’d it go?”

“It’s gonna be an early Christmas, Obie,” Tony said, forcing himself to sound cheerful.

Obie barked a triumphant laugh. “That’s my boy! Now, don’t worry about getting back right away. Relax, meet some girls, get some R&R. You deserve it!”

“That’s sweet, but I want to hold a board meeting as soon as I get back. Arrange it for me, will ya?”

“What’s with the sudden interest in meetings, huh? You never went to any of them before.”

“Yeah, well, this time it’s different. Just set it up, alright? I’ll see you in a few hours.”

Tony ended the call before Obadiah could ask some more questions. The man was already suspicious that Tony had yet to sign the papers to renew their contract with the military.

Tony looked out the window. He was against doing the demonstration—even if it was just some bombs—so close to the demilitarized zone his country shared with North Titan. The latter country always found every reason to accuse the South of trying to end their armistice. Tony wouldn’t be surprised if the headlines of tomorrow’s news from North Titan’s press secretary read something similar.

That Thanos president of theirs was one crazy son of a—BOOM!

The Humvee turned over with a crash and Tony never got to finish his train of thought.

…

When Tony woke up, he was bound to a chair and his arms hurt like hell at their current position. He took a deep breath and tasted something weird when he licked his lips. Had he been drugged? Where was he? Did he still have all his organs?

A hand roughly tipped his chin up and Tony noticed the man filming him from across the room as well as the group of armed thugs gathered around him. Their faces were covered making it impossible for Tony to even give a description to the police should he ever escape.

“Obadiah Stane, we have your man. Send us the rest of the five million like we agreed and we’ll send you his head as the receipt.”

The first thing Tony thought was: Rest of the five million? How much was he worth exactly? And the second thing was: Obadiah asked these people to kidnap and kill him?

Whatever his captor had to say next, Tony never knew because shots started firing. One of his kidnappers ran and bumped into Tony causing his chair to tip over to the side and fall.

Tony screamed, curling his body inwards as much as his bonds allowed. “DON’T SHOOT! DON’T SHOOT! I’M A CIVILIAN!”

The shooting did not cease. Bullets ricocheted off the walls. One hit the camera. Most of the thugs ran out whereas some stayed to fight the four soldiers who barged into the room.

One of them, Tony saw, was a woman who had thrown her gun away after running out of bullets and proceeded to engage in hand to hand combat with a man twice her size.

“OOH!” He winced when she slammed the bad guy down to the floor and choked him using her thighs.

Another female soldier dragged Tony by the legs of his chair, out of the room and away from the action.

“Cut me loose!” he shouted at her.

The woman ignored him and said, “Stay here.”

“WHERE ELSE WOULD I GO?” Tony yelled after her. He lay there for a while until the gunshots died down and the woman came back to get him.

She righted his chair, asking, “What’s your name?” She then cut through the rope around his hands and feet.

“Tony. You guys came just in time. Did Happy send you?” He rubbed his wrists, wondering if the rope burns were going to scar.

The woman easily helped him up with one strong arm and said, “Who is Happy?”

Figures, Tony thought. They wouldn’t know Happy. They were probably just ordered by some high ranking officer to rescue him. Or…

“You got your orders from President Danvers, huh?” That made sense. He and Carol Danvers had some kind of friendship. She probably found out Obie had him kidnapped and dispatched the military to rescue him. He couldn’t help but repress a smile at finding out Danvers had a soft side for him after all.

“What are you accusing us of?” the woman said again, body growing tense.

Tony immediately held up his hands in a calming gesture. “Whoa. I just meant that if you didn’t get the rescue orders from my assistant then you might have gotten them from the President. What’s the big deal?”

They were joined by another soldier who looked rather young to be a soldier but whatever. “All clear in there, Captain.” Then he looked at her and then at Tony and realized he had just interrupted something. His body language immediately shifted, reminding Tony of a coiled spring. “Everything alright?”

The Captain shook her head. “He thinks we consorted with the South to rescue him. Even went as far as to say that we were acting on orders from Carol Danvers.”

The kid gasped and then shot Tony a very offended look. “We would never betray our nation like that!”

Tony’s brows furrowed. “Well, then, who did order you to rescue me?”

“Nobody ordered us. We’ve been tracking the Ten Rings for—” the kid was cut off by the Captain elbowing him, the look on the her face telling him that he shouldn’t say anything in front of Tony who had turned from a rescued hostage to a suspect in less than a minute.

Then there came a voice from the radio, “All good in here, Pepper. Over.”

Before Tony could stop himself, he snorted. “Pepper? What kind of a mother names her child after a spice?”

“It’s a codename,” said the kid while Pepper didn’t engage. Instead, she shot back a reply through the radio.

“You and War Machine call it in and wait for reinforcements. Spider and I have something to take care of.”

Tony pointed at the kid and mouthed “Spider?” at him. The kid nodded.

Pepper turned to Tony and placing her hand on her gun holster, said, “Hands up right now.”

“Hey, hey, really? I’m the victim here!” The kid grabbed Tony’s hands and forced it behind his back, cuffing him. “I was kidnapped!”

“We arrest you in the name of Thanos, leader of the North Titan government,” stated the Captain but she never got to finish whatever it was she had to say because Tony did a double take.

“Th-Thanos? North titan?” He laughed but couldn’t quite stop his voice from cracking. “You’re kidding, right? Right? This is a prank.” He began looking around, trying to spot hidden cameras.

The more he thought about it, the more plausible the prank scenario made sense. Obie wouldn’t have him killed! But he would pull this trick on Tony as payback for all the pranks Tony did to him in the past. “Alright, Obie, you can come out now. You got me. Faking a kidnapping. North Titan. For a moment there, I actually thought you had me taken!”

“You’re weird,” said Spider as he pushed Tony forward, hands still on his back.

They began to walk out of what Tony now knew to be an empty warehouse. There was still light out but only barely; the sun was just about to rise.

Tony looked around but couldn’t tell which part of South Titan he currently was at.

There was a car parked outside and the kid made him get in. Tony was then joined by Pepper in the back seat while this Spider kid got into the driver’s seat.

“Are you guys taking me back to the city?” Tony leaned back in relief as the car started and they began to leave the place. “Good. Cause I have a board meeting to get to. Now that I know this is all a prank, can I just say, you really had me scared back there,” Tony said to Pepper. “And Obie really went all out with the special effects and the casting. You’re exactly my type!” She had a small square-shaped face and even in the dim light, he could see her cheeks glowing a nice shade of red from glaring at him for making the comment. She had green eyes which made Tony wonder if under the helmet, she also had red hair to complement it. “I mean, now that I’m not scared for my life and all and I can take a good look at you, you’re really attractive!” Pepper only continued to ignore him and Tony repressed a smile, liking her already.

He’d get her to budge as soon as he was back in civilization. Not that he needed a home court advantage but it helped.

Then the car rounded a corner and Tony looked out the window, trying to see if he could identify where he was.

It looked like he was out of town or a small remote village if the lack of lights or skyscrapers were anything to go by. And then Tony saw something that felt like he had left his insides back at the warehouse.

There was a huge billboard accompanied by a flag waving at him. A purple man was grinning at him, almost mockingly, from that billboard and the flag had a golden moon on it—North Titan’s logo.

Tony choked on his own saliva. “That’s not possible.” Not only was it impossible for Obadiah Stane or Happy Hogan to accomplish putting up that face and flag as it was tantamount to treason, but it was also impossible for Tony to be in North Titan right now! He can’t! He just can’t!

He turned to Pepper. “We’re really in North Titan? You weren’t joking?”

“Nobody was joking earlier,” said Spider.

“But I was just near the demilitarized zone and—” Tony’s eyes widened in realization that one, he had been kidnapped and by Obadiah Stane at that and two, these soldiers thought he was a South Titanian spy who infiltrated their country. No wonder they were so insulted at the mention of Danvers. “You guys got it all wrong. My name is Tony Stark. I’m the CEO and Owner of Stark Industries. I make weapons for a living and I was demonstrating near the border when my company was ambushed. I belong in South Titan! You guys have to believe me! I’m not supposed to be here! I was kidnapped and you need to take me back to my country right now!”

Up in front, Spider laughed. “Still sticking with the story, huh? Why did the Ten Rings kidnap you then? What is it you have on them?”

“Who?” Tony shook his head. “I have no idea what you’re talking about. Look, look.” Tony jutted out his hip at Pepper who looked ready to smack him for lurid displays of behavior until he said, “Those idiots took my phone but they didn’t take my wallet. It’s still in there. Check my ID!”

Pepper exchanged looks with Spider again and then she dug her hands in Tony’s back pocket. She took out a wallet, opened it, and then just like Tony said, took out his national ID.

“See? I’m telling the truth!”

Pepper then told Spider, “Peter, pull up here.”

The kid did as he was told and then Pepper turned on the lights in the car. She then looked at the ID again and back at Tony. She exhaled. “I believe you.”

“You do?”

“You what?” asked Spider or Peter. Spider-Peter, Tony thought to himself. “Captain, come on!”

The Captain tossed the ID to Peter who inspected it himself. Meanwhile she said, “It has the official strip. It can’t be faked. He’s telling the truth.”

Then Peter leaned back and addressed Tony, his eyes lighting up like he was looking at Tony in an entirely new perspective. “So, you’re really from the South? That’s so cool! I have a lot of questions about Luke Skywalker. You know Luke right? From Star Wars?” It was complete turn from the tough kid he was that Tony was rendered speechless.

He stared at Peter, not believing that this was the question he had to answer all of a sudden. “What does that have anything to do with—”

“Ask him your questions later,” Pepper said to Peter. “We need to figure out what to do with him.”

“Protocol dictates we take suspicious people to the State Department,” said Peter. “Even if we didn’t believe him, he’s definitely suspicious. I mean, the Ten Rings must’ve taken him for a reason.”

“My mentor paid them to kill me, okay?” Tony then told them what he overheard the bad guy say in his ransom video. “But since you interrupted their recording—not that I’m ungrateful—Stane probably thinks I’m dead which means he’s going to take over my company, which is probably what he’s been planning this whole time. That bastard! I have to go back!”

“Spider, start the car,” instructed Pepper. She sent an apologetic look at Tony’s direction. “We’re going to follow protocol. State will investigate your claims and decide what to do with you.”

“But why?” Tony cried, “Can’t you just tell them what I told you? You can’t send me to your leaders. I’m an outsider, an Outlander! I don’t belong here! I’ve seen enough movies to know how this will play out. Your people are going to frame me and my face will come out in the news: Handsome Outlander caught in North Titan. Then, they’ll send me to prison where you cut off all my hair and kill me and then send my hairless head back to my country as a warning!”

Peter snorted and then laughed. “That’s ridiculous! We don’t send your head back hairless. Maybe trimmed, but not hairless.”

“You have nothing to worry about,” Pepper added, “if you’re telling the truth.”

Tony groaned and then leaned close to Pepper, desperate, “Listen, Captain Pepper, do you really think it’s going to work out in my favor? Come on! Our two countries are enemies! I’m a Southerner and not just any Southerner. I’ve been producing South Titan’s military’s weapons for years! You really think they won’t torture all the South’s secrets out of me?”

“Well… he’s not wrong, Captain,” said Peter a little hesitantly, “We know there are corrupt officials in State. We’ve been tracking the Ten Rings for years during our months off, trying to find evidence to link them to Ronan. And if what he’s saying is true, then we know they’re in contact with this Obadiah Stane in the South to do their illegal activities.” He sighed. “What I’m saying is, we trust State and we can’t guarantee the Outlander’ll be sent back safely. So, maybe… we can we keep him for now?”

Ignoring the fact that this kid just made Tony sound like he was a stray dog, Tony decided to echo the former’s sentiments. “Yeah! Just temporarily until you guys can hatch a plan!”

Pepper shut her eyes like she had developed a headache. Then, she opened them again and said, “Fine. But you’re explaining to Natasha and Rhodey why we’ve adopted an Outlander.”

…

Back in the present

“So, really, I’m grateful you guys hid me here in Pepper’s house,” Tony concluded, motioning to his surroundings. “I mean, the TV could show more channels. I know a really good piece of art that would go great on that blank wall right there—”

Pepper cleared her throat and Tony directed his attention back to them. “Right. You guys can spend your days off in peace while I’m going to build a sat-phone that can contact my people, have Obie arrested, and send an extraction team to rescue me. To do that, I’m gonna need a couple of things: a tuna sandwich, a screwdriver, a—”

“No,” said Natasha.

Tony blinked. “No to the tuna sandwich or no to the screwdriver? Because I could make it ham if tuna’s scarce right now but I can’t really budge on the screwdriver.”

“No, you can’t contact your people,” Rhodey clarified, exasperated and looking like he had lost all the patience he had for Tony which Tony knew wasn’t much to begin with. “Do you want us to get caught? This isn’t as easy as illegally streaming South Titanian movies. Send a message to the South and our government is going to come and find us.” He then addressed everybody in the room, “And I have some bad news. The members of the Ten Rings that we caught this morning were killed in a car crash on route to the detainment facility an hour ago.”

Pepper and Natasha looked unsurprised. Peter cursed under his breath while Tony gaped.

“Was it an accident?” Tony asked, already knowing the answer.

“They want it to look that way,” Rhodey replied. “But that’s my point. The minute you send a message out, they’ll come barging in here, arrest and kill us and you for simply trying to get rid of the Ten Rings. And they won’t have any qualms about making it look like an accident either.”

Tony threw his hands up in exasperation. “This is just so typical! The minute I try to turn my life around, something like this happens to me.” He then turned to Pepper. “So, what are you gonna do? I can’t just live here forever!” He hasn’t been here for 24 hours but he was already going stir crazy.

Peter raised his hand.

“You’re really serious with the hand up?” Tony asked him.

“I have an idea,” said Peter, grinning and glancing at his colleagues.  “We can smuggle him out.”

Natasha immediately agreed. “You’re on to something. I know a guy. Smuggles goods in from the South using his fishing boat.” For a woman that Tony knew distrusted him, she was pretty determined to send him back.

Pepper cocked an eye at her. “Do I want to know why you know someone like that?”

Natasha didn’t bat an eye. “Nope. Just be ready to give him something valuable in return for his efforts.”

A phone call later and Natasha confirmed their plan.

“My contact is going to meet another boat in a week to exchange goods. He says he can bring you by then.”

“So, you’re saying I just have to survive here for a week. I can do that!” Tony said more to himself than to his newfound saviors. “Thanks, Widow.”

“Don’t thank me. I just want you gone before we’re all caught.”

“He’s not asking for too much, is he?” Rhodey asked which made Tony a little bit embarrassed because he only had a limited amount of cash in his wallet but North Titan used a different currency, anyway. His clothes probably had a lot more value than the pieces of paper tucked in his wallet.

“Just some calling cards,” Natasha assured him like the words meant something to Tony.

Tony fixed Peter with a look that asked him to explain and the kid did not disappoint. “It’s like a card with calling credit that you can use to make calls. Fishermen rarely earn enough to buy those. We’ll deal with it, don’t worry.”

Tony nodded, trying not to feel too bad. He hadn’t had to rely on someone else’s good will or generosity since… well… since he could remember.

Pepper suddenly clapped her hands together, startling Tony to attention. “Well, that’s settled then. I’ll go to the city to get some supplies and I’ll be back later tonight. You three, watch him.”

“What?” Rhodey, Natasha, and Tony cried in unison.

“I don’t need a babysitter!” Tony said, getting up to his feet.

“You’re not seriously making me spend my days off with him!” Rhodey spat, rising as well.

“I am not going to sit here and prevent these two from killing each other!” said Natasha, eyes pleading.

The only one who wasn’t complaining and looked like he had just gotten a gift was Peter. He was grinning from ear to ear at the prospect of spending time with a Southerner.

“Can’t I just come with you?” All of the soldiers shot Tony a look which the latter took as a no. “You don’t expect me to just stay inside for a week, do you?!”

“Yes!” They said in unison.

“Right here in North Titan, you don’t get rights, alright?” said Rhodey.

“It may sound unfair, but you have to do as we say and not as you want,” said Natasha.

“It’s for your own protection,” Peter added with an apologetic look.

Pepper moved closer to Tony and explained, “We’re not saying don’t go out at all. Just don’t go out when we’re not around. I swear to you that no one will harm you as long as you’re with us.”

Tony looked at each one of them and asked, “And if I’m not with you guys?”

“Just remember that you’re an Outlander in a place where that’s not a very safe thing to be.”

Tony’s sighed, shoulders drooping. “Well, what am I gonna do? I mean, I don’t have any clothes. I don’t have any toys. You guys don’t even have internet here!”

Pepper handed him a pen and paper. “Make a list and I’ll try to get whatever you need in the city.”

A list. Tony could handle a simple list.

He sat back down in his seat and started writing.

When he was done, he rose and looked for Pepper. She was in a hurry to leave earlier, so as to make it in time when the stores in the city were still open.

He eventually found her and Natasha having a hushed conversation in the hallway. He moved before they could spot him but stayed to listen. He couldn’t blindly trust these Northerners just like they didn’t trust him.

“… me why is he here?”

“I told you. It was Peter’s idea.”

“Pepper, I know you. You never agree to any of Peter’s ideas unless you had a good reason.”

“Stark survived what happened this morning. The rest of the Ten Rings are going to be looking for him to complete their transaction. We need to keep him safe and send him back. I can’t lose any more people to them.”

“Pepper, this isn’t like Morgan.”

“It won’t be. Because I’m gonna make sure Tony Stark lives.”

Tony then heard them walking and quickly ran towards the opposite direction. When Pepper saw him in the kitchen, he wordlessly handed out the list to her, all the while thinking about what he just overheard.

The only reason Company 12 decided to take Tony in and help him was because they distrusted the Ten Rings more than they did a Southerner. And this wasn’t the Captain’s first rodeo with the kidnappers.

Interesting.

Thinking it would be best to study his new companions next, Tony took the time to observe them while Pepper was out. Like he guessed they would be, all of them were very prim and proper. For instance, Rhodey strictly refused to drink until it was drinking hour and Natasha refused to talk about her personal life because they weren’t close friends. Tony didn’t know if it was a cultural thing or a provincial thing.

Natasha, who was currently doing something in the kitchen, seemed like a no-nonsense sort of woman. She kept to herself most of the time and rarely said anything, except if it was of value. Tony was a tad bit afraid of her given the fact that her codename was Widow and he really didn’t want to find out what happened to her late husband.

Rhodey, on the other hand, was easier to read. He was fiercely loyal to his teammates and wanted the best for his country which Tony had to admire him for. And from the way he was chopping wood in the backyard, the man called War Machine had some fire power in him.

Now, this youngest soldier, this Spider kid, must have been born in the wrong country. Peter was an open book; he was honest and carefree, a little too trusting for his own good. He would illegally stream South Titanian videos and TV shows at work and served as a translator between the Northern soldiers and Tony whenever the latter used Southern slang.

At present, Tony was carrying a conversation with Peter about Star Wars Episode V and Peter’s whole body seemed to vibrate in suspense, “And what happened after that?”

“Vader looks at Luke and says, ‘I am your father.’”

“WHAT?” Peter cried, eyes almost popping out in a comical way. Tony would have laughed if he didn’t completely sympathize with the poor kid.

Tony nodded seriously. “That’s what I said!”

“But but but—”

“HEY, YOU TWO!” Natasha called from the kitchen window. “Get in here and start cracking these zargnuts!”

Tony nudged Peter. “What are zargnuts?”

“The best thing you’ll ever taste this side of Titan! Come on!”

…

Peter, Rhodey, and Natasha left Tony when the sun had set, repeating their firm instructions not to go outside, not to look out the window, and not to show his face to anyone.

They might as well have just instructed Tony not to breathe for all the Don’ts he had to remember.

To pass the time until Pepper returned, Tony went around the house, appraising the place. From what he saw when he was outside, most of the houses here were similar. Probably Thanos’ idea of making everybody equal.

Inside the house, however, was another story. Back in the South, they had a running joke about how the Northerners lived in a backwards country. But from what Tony could see, North Titan’s technology was really something else which now that he thought about it, shouldn’t surprise him. Wasn’t Thanos a technophile? Didn’t North Titan’s politicians all boast about Thanos having graduated with honors from the top engineering school in Chen when he was only sixteen? The guy may be crazy but he was also a genius.

For a house that was situated in the provincial part of North Titan, it had a pretty efficient sanitation system, plumbing, and electricity. Tony couldn’t help but appreciate it all. The only issue he had with the place was the lack of internet in the area and the limited selection on TV. No wonder Peter was obsessed with Southern shows and films.

Pepper also had a pretty well-stocked bookshelf. There were some cookbooks but a majority of books were on art—books that weren’t published in North Titan and books that were in another language. Switz, to be precise. She was probably from a military family seeing as only the children of high ranking military officers were allowed to study abroad

She was a Captain but was educated in the humanities? There’s definitely a story there, Tony thought.

There was a surprisingly lack of photographs in the house. Either Pepper cared for no one or she didn’t want to be reminded of people she cared about.

When Tony had finished his inspection, he decided he really couldn’t wait for Pepper to come back with clothes. He needed a shower now.

He inspected the bathroom and saw that there were clean towels folded inside one of the cabinets. There was also a bar of soap. Tony shrugged. It’ll have to do.

He stripped out of his clothes and got in the bathtub.

He spent the first few minutes relishing in the warm water. If Tony closed his eyes and pretended hard enough, he could almost imagine himself back in his own bathroom. Afterwards, Tony started to scrub off all the dirt and grime from the warehouse.

When he was done, he dried himself off and began wrapping a towel around his waist. As much as he’d like to surprise the hell out of Pepper when she returned, he didn’t really think it would be a great idea for him to walk around buck naked in a house he didn’t own.

Just as he had the towel securely tucked around his waist, he heard the front door open and someone go, “Captain Potts?”

Tony froze. That sure as hell did not sound like any of the members of Company 12. He pressed his ear to the door and heard more than one pair of footsteps.

“We’re here for a random inspection,” the mysterious person continued and Tony guessed from her voice that she was a woman… Except her voice sounded almost mechanical. “Captain Potts, are you here?”

“She’s not here,” came another voice. It was deep and gruff… and male by the sound of it. But more than that, it made the hair on Tony’s arms stand and he didn’t understand why.

He backed away from the door quickly and accidentally knocked over the cup that held Pepper’s toothbrush. It clattered to the floor noisily.

Tony winced and held his breath.

“There’s someone in there. Check it out,” said Mr. Gruff.

“Yes, Sir.” Tony quickly held on to the door knob at the same time the person on the other end twisted it. “Hold on.” Then Tony heard some gears turning and all of a sudden, the door was pushed open and Tony stood there looking like a deer caught in headlights. A naked deer caught in headlights.

Ms. Mechanical turned out to be a blue chick with cybernetic enhancements. She was wearing a vest with a nameplate that said Nebula. Mr. Gruff, on the other hand, was a scary-looking and giant Kree who was oddly not surprised to see Tony. His uniform told Tony he was someone important if the number of moon badges on his uniform were anything to go by. Tony also read from the nameplate on his breast that his name was Ronan. Why did that name sound familiar?

 “Who are you?” asked Nebula, surprised to find him in Pepper’s house. “This is Captain Potts’ house. What are you doing hiding in her bathroom?”

Tony licked his lips which had suddenly gone dry. What was he supposed to say? That he was a house sitter while Pepper had gone shopping? He was her guest?

“Present your ID.” There was something in the way Ronan asked him that made Tony wonder if the guy knew he didn’t have one.

Tony looked down at his towel clad hips and said, “I don’t have it.”

Ronan sneered. “Then I suggest you go get it.”

Tony gulped. “I… I, er, don’t have one,” he admitted, not knowing what else to say. His foot was tapping the floor anxiously, wondering when oh when was Pepper going to get back?

“Arrest him on grounds of suspicion,” Ronan directed Nebula who immediately complied.

And that was how Tony found himself being arrested again but this time, with only a towel to keep him warm—a towel that Tony hoped wouldn’t fail him any time soon. To make matters worse, the entire neighborhood seemed to have gotten word that an arrest was in order and had gone out of their houses to witness the scene.

Well, Tony said to himself, public indecency isn’t exactly your first rodeo.

“Don’t you have to read me my rights? Give me a lawyer?” Tony struggled against Nebula’s grasp but the cyber girl was incredibly strong. “I want my phone call!”

As Tony was being shoved inside a patrol vehicle, he heard the cries of a very familiar, very comforting voice.

His knees almost gave way when he saw Pepper getting out of her car and running up to him, eyes in glorious fury. At that moment, he had never loved anyone more than he loved her for simply showing up.

“What are you doing?!” Pepper cried, rushing over to Nebula and Tony. “Uncuff him right now!”

Nebula shook her head apologetically.  “Major’s orders, Cap. I’m sorry.”

Ronan, with his hands clasped behind his back, walked up to Pepper and literally looked down at her from his enormous height. “We caught him hiding in your bathroom during a random inspection. He was unable to show us his national ID and we had no choice but to arrest him.”

Pepper huffed. “He wasn’t trespassing!”

“Captain Potts, do you know him?” asked Nebula.

“Or are you hiding this man?” Ronan rephrased, cocking an eyebrow at her.

Pepper did a very good job of looking like she wasn’t guilty of the latter accusation and instead said, “Of course, I know him! He’s my fiancé!”

Tony’s choked in surprise and Pepper immediately went up to him, gently cupped his face, and checked him for any injuries. “Are you okay?” she said, her voice surprisingly tender.

Tony still hadn’t recovered from that shocker of an information and could only nod even though his heart was thumping so loud, he swore everyone heard it. 

“Your—your fiancé?” even Nebula looked surprised. She looked at Tony, her eyes roving all over his chest and then down to the towel. Her face made it clear that she was unimpressed with him. Maybe Tony lacked a wire or a USB port or something.

“Yes! So, please uncuff him. He’s a guest in my house. Nebula, you know me. I would never hide anybody that warranted suspicion!”

Nebula studied Pepper’s face and decided she believed her more than she did Ronan. She uncuffed Tony and Pepper yanked him behind her as soon as he was free.

“Fiancé?” Ronan’s tone left it clear that he didn’t believe Pepper and Tony wondered if he had beef against her. “Then how come he couldn’t present us with an ID?”

“Oh. Well, that’s… that’s because he’s from the South.”

Tony’s eyes widened and he tightened his grip on Pepper’s hand in surprise. Whatever happened to being safe when she’s around thing?

Pepper squeezed his hand in return, a small squeeze that she probably meant to be reassuring but did not reassure Tony at all. What was she playing at?

“He was raised there. For Operation Avengers,” Pepper stated, looking at Ronan like she was almost challenging him to contest that fact. Tony looked between them and wondered what the hell was Operation Avengers and why did it sound like something out of a comic book?

“He’s only just returned and well, we haven’t really gotten into the process of getting his ID again because,” Pepper then began to giggle uncharacteristically which made Tony gape at her.  “We wanted some time together. You understand, right, Major Ronan?”

Ronan frowned, eyes darting to Tony, his towel, and then to Pepper.

“Of course,” he said in a tone that told Tony he didn’t understand at all, much less believed them, but he had no other choice than to pretend that he did. He bowed his head slightly to Tony and said, “I apologize for the misunderstanding. We welcome you back to our beloved nation, Mister…?”

Tony opened his mouth but Pepper beat him to it. “Steve Rogers.”

“Mr. Rogers,” Ronan said, smiling a little too creepily for Tony’s taste.

“An honest mistake,” Tony replied, forcing himself to smile back.

“Well, then, I bid you a good evening.” He turned around and addressed Nebula. “I think that concludes our random inspection tonight.”

Nebula saluted. “Yes, Major.”

…

As soon as they were back inside the safety of the house, Tony whirled to face Pepper, his hands on his hips. “You owe me an apology!”

Pepper’s eyes flashed with annoyance. “Excuse me? You should be thanking me! I saved you out there!”

“You wouldn’t need to save me if I had come with you like I asked! Remember what you told me? You told me I would be safe as long as I was with you or if I stayed inside this house! Well, I stayed and I was just dragged out there wearing nothing but a towel for everyone to see!”

It was only then that Pepper took in Tony’s appearance and for the first time in his life Tony felt quite self-conscious around a woman. He adjusted the towel so that it was tucked around him more securely.

He was about to go on and give an explanation about why he was wearing only a towel when Pepper said, “You’re right, I’m sorry.”

Tony almost did a double take. He hadn’t expected her to apologize. “Thank you.” Then, realizing just how close he was to getting caught, he suddenly wrapped his arms around Pepper and hugged her tight. “Thank you for your coming back! I mean you could’ve come back a little bit earlier but still, thank you! If it wasn’t for you, I’d probably be in prison by now!”

He felt Pepper pat him slowly on the back. “Don’t worry. I won’t leave you alone again.”

They stood there, hugging for a few moments, until Pepper cleared her throat and Tony pulled away. He ran a hand through his hair sheepishly. “So, uh… I’m your fiancé now?”

Pepper exhaled deeply and explained, “I had to explain why you were in my house.”

“It also explains why I was in your bathroom,” Tony added. Hoping to dispel any remaining tension in the room, he shot Pepper a teasing grin and said, “So, tell me how I proposed.”

Pepper glared at him and then tossed him a large plastic bag in reply.

Tony caught it and rummaged through its contents. Clothes. Deodorant. Underwear. A razor. He looked at Pepper. “What about the single malt scotch? I told you I needed it for a night cap.” Pepper ignored him and simply walked past him to the kitchen. Tony followed not far behind. “And you also decided not to get the gluten-free flour or the blueberries. How am I gonna make my pancakes? And you forgot the cologne.”

“Do you want the stuff or not?” Pepper asked him.

Tony clutched the bag to his chest. “I do.”

“Then stop complaining.”

Tony shut his mouth and put the bag on the table. Then he looked at Pepper who was pouring herself a glass of water. Tony waited until she finished drinking it and then asked, “Pepper, what’s Operation Avengers?”

“Huh? Oh. That. It’s a top secret operation where North Titanians are born and raised in the South. They can perform missions undetected and when their mission is done, they return here.”

Tony let the information sink in for a moment. There were rumors that there were Northern spies in the South just like there were Southern spies in the North but to have that confirmed to his face sort of warranted a little pause. “But won’t Ronan just check if you’re telling the truth and come back and arrest us?”

Pepper shook her head and explained, “Operation Avengers needs a level 6 clearance. Ronan is only privy to level 4 and below. But the clearance level won’t stop him for long. He’s already suspicious and most likely knows you’re not who we’re saying you are.”

“Explain.” Tony demanded, “How does he know?”

Pepper motioned for him to sit and when they were both settled, she began, “We have reason to believe that Ronan has been funding the Ten Rings and using it get away with murder, corruption, smuggling, and various other crimes.” Tony now remembered where he heard the name Ronan before. Pepper mentioned him earlier to Natasha. “The fact that he did a random inspection in this area when he’s never personally done one before tells me that he was looking for the Ten Rings’ missing captive. You.”

Tony recalled that Ronan hardly looked surprised to find him in Pepper’s bathroom. “But how did he know I’d be here?”

“He didn’t. That’s why he needed the cover of a random inspection to inspect all houses, especially mine and members of Company 12. He’s been suspecting me for working against him for a while.”

Tony exhaled deeply. “I don’t understand. He found me. He could have identified me as a Southerner, arrested me, and killed me to get the rest of his money. Why didn’t he?”

“Because then he wouldn’t be able to explain how he knew you were a Southerner without implicating himself with the Ten Rings and revealing that he consorts with Southerners. Besides, the whole neighborhood witnessed what happened. He couldn’t just arrest an Avenger without valid cause.”

Tony whistled. Man, did this woman have balls. “Jeez, Captain. Haven’t you ever heard of the expression kissing your superiors’ ass?”

Pepper grimaced. “Is kissing ass something you guys do in the South?”

Tony shook his head and then turned his thoughts back to Ronan. “But there’s something bothering me. I don’t think he knows my name.” Steve Rogers Ronan had said in a way that felt as if he was testing the name out, committing it to memory.

“If you’re right then that works in your favor. If he doesn’t have your name, he can’t look you up or prove you’re from the South, not without help from people higher up.”

Lucky me, Tony thought dryly. Then, he rose and grabbed his plastic bag. “I should go change. Thanks for this.”

After he had changed into the new clothes, he entered the room he was supposed to sleep in. He shut off the lights and lay on the bed for a few moments, staring at the ceiling.

His eyelids drifted closed and then BOOM!

His eyes shot open in the dark, body on edge. He could hear gunshots go off in the distance and he turned on one side and placed the pillow over his head to muffle the sound. When that didn’t work, he stared at the ceiling some more.

Then, making up his mind, he climbed out of the bed, walked out of his room, and knocked on Pepper’s door.

“Yes?” Tony saw that she had exchanged her clothes for a matching set of gray pajamas. Somehow that didn’t surprise Tony. She didn’t give off a nightgown vibe.

“I know that I’m supposed to be in the spare room, but…” She raised an intimidating brow and Tony stammered over what to he was going to say next. “I mean—I think you and I should—because we’re now engaged and everything—just for my protection and all—”

Pepper’s brows knit together impatiently. “What are you talking about?”

“Can I sleep with you?” Tony blurted out and winced at how that could be misunderstood. “I don’t mean sleep with you like have sex. I mean, sleeping in the same room as you. I can bring my mattress here and sleep on the floor. I just…” Tony looked around; it was ridiculous how paranoid he was. He whispered, “What if Ronan comes back and takes me in the middle of the night?”

Pepper’s eyes softened. “He’s not going to come back.”

“How would you know that if inspections are random?”

“Because I don’t think he’s going to inspect the house again after having just inspected it. Besides, he can’t use the Ten Rings again so soon after their members got caught and killed in a supposed accident. He needs them to hide in the shadows for now.”

She made a move to close the door. In desperation and also having abandoned his pride in the warehouse, Tony stuck his foot in the gap and said, “You promised!”

“What?”

“You promised you won’t leave me alone again. And in that room… I’m all alone and it’s like I’m in the warehouse again or sometimes in the bathroom with only a towel protecting me from the evil major and… Please?”

Pepper sighed and swung the door wide open. “But you’re staying on the floor and if you touch me, I’ll kill you.”

Tony beamed at her.  “I’ll go get my mattress.”

…

The following day’s breakfast found Pepper and Tony seated opposite Rhodey, Peter, and Natasha at the dining table in what was Round 2 of Interrogations.

Rhodey’s index finger was pointed at Tony and then it switched to Pepper. “So, the two of you are engaged?”

“Pretending to be engaged,” Peter corrected him, his mouth curling in a smile. Tony noted that he was the only one among the soldiers who was happy with the news. Tony himself was quite pleased; after thinking about it long and hard the night before, he had concluded that he could have a lot of fun with this fake-engagement. Riling the feisty Captain and her team up was about his only source of entertainment.

And just to prove a point to himself about how much fun he could have, he faked a yawn, stretched his arms out, and put his right arm around Pepper.

Rhodey’s eyes seemed to pop out of its sockets while Pepper used the opportunity to say, “So, you guys can’t look at us like that when he does stuff like this.” And just to tease the Chihuahua, Tony moved his chair closer to Pepper and rested his head on her shoulder. She only rolled her eyes, nudged him away, and then continued, “When there are eyes watching, we treat Tony like he’s my long-awaited fiancé. He is also going to be known as Steve Rogers from now on.” Tony had a lot to say about that name—for some reason it felt like a name of a self-righteous prick—but felt like now wasn’t the time to comment.

“Spider, he needs an ID.” Peter nodded curtly. “I should also present him to Nebula,” Pepper continued. “She’ll be angry at me for not informing her I had a guest. You know how she is. She dislikes being caught off guard.”

“Nebula’s that enhanced woman, right?”

“She leads and protects this town,” Natasha answered. “Nothing goes on without her knowing about it. The fact that Ronan just appeared out of the blue last night tells me Nebula didn’t know about him coming either. She’ll be in a bad mood. You and Pepper need to do a lot of groveling to get on her good side.” Then Natasha got up to deposit her plate in the sink.

The expression on Pepper’s face told Tony that she already knew what to do and was willing to do it. Tony, on the other hand, not so much.

“I suggest you two invite her to the wedding that you’ll never have,” Rhodey suggested. Was he mocking them? Tony flicked a bread crumb at him.

“Oooh! It’s like that Southern movie The Proposal!” Peter gushed and explained to his teammates. “Ryan Reynolds makes Sandra Bullock his fiancé so that she doesn’t get deported!” He pointed at Tony, “You’re Sandra Bullock in this situation,” then he pointed at Pepper, “And you’re Ryan Reynolds.” Then he gasped and eyed them suspiciously. “You two didn’t share a room last night did you?”

Tony and Pepper exchanged looks and then spoke at the same time.

“He slept on the floor.”

“No, of course not.”

Peter was full on laughing now. “IT IS EXACTLY LIKE THE MOVIE!”

“Did your movie ever mention what to do if we’re under surveillance?” asked Natasha.

They all faced her direction. She was looking out of the kitchen window and they all quickly moved to join her. From their spot they could see two men working on the electric power pole right across from the house.

“See that?” Natasha said to Tony, pointing at the wire they were attaching. “That’s not for electricity. We have about five minutes of being able to talk freely until we have to play pretend.”

“This is Ronan’s doing,” Rhodey said grimly, “He’s gathering incriminating evidence to bring you in. Since he can’t accuse you of being a Southerner, he’ll just conveniently ‘discover’ that you are one.”

Tony moved away from the window and started looking around, trying to find something. He spotted what he needed and then stated, “Lucky for you guys, I’m Tony Stark.”

All four of them turned to stare at him, not understanding what he just said.

Tony sighed. “I can create an interfering signal so that he can’t hear us. But I’m only doing it for one room in the house, otherwise, they’d get more suspicious.”

Pepper nodded. “Let’s do it in my room… peach.” She said it slowly, seeing how the word would taste in her mouth.

“Peach?” Tony reacted dramatically, sticking his tongue out in aversion, “That’s the pet name you use here? Uh-uh. Do I look like a peach to you?”

“I bet you bruise like one,” muttered Rhodey while Peter laughed.

Natasha then said, “You guys better not break character outside the bedroom.”

…

Peter took Tony’s photo and promised to get his fake ID sorted out. Afterwards, Pepper and Tony paid a visit to Nebula. Just like Natasha said, she was very cold towards the couple.

“Ronan wasn’t pleased, Cap,” said Nebula. “Ordered me to keep an eye on you.” Her cybernetic eye seemed to focus on Tony and he shivered.

“I’m sorry! You know how it is, Neb,” said Pepper. “I was excited to have him all to myself for a while.”

But even the passion and excitement of young love weren’t enough to change Nebula’s mood… That is until Tony noticed the crick in her arm.

“You need any help with that?” he said, cutting into their conversation. “I can tell your arm’s hurting you. That wasn’t there last night. Was it your boss?” Ronan must have hurt her. Or she hurt herself. Or someone else did.

Nebula’s eyes turned dark at that and Tony immediately rephrased, “I just mean that I could take a look at it, if you want. Back in the South, I was in charge of the tech. Robots. Cars. Enhanced individuals. I could fix it.”

Pepper grasped Nebula’s hand gently. “He’s really good at what he does. And he won’t tell anybody about it.”

Nebula’s eyes darted between Pepper and Tony and then she extended her arm, giving Tony permission.

After that, her mood had brightened considerably. Not only was Pepper forgiven and Steve Rogers her favorite person now, but everyone in the neighborhood seemed to have one problem or another with their tech and was sending it to Pepper’s house. Of course, the “faulty” tech was only a front to go and see the Captain Potts’ handsome fiancé. It gave Tony something to keep his mind of things and also a way to earn his keep.

When Steve Rogers wasn’t playing mechanic, he and the team pretended like they were one big happy family. While the four soldiers were easily able to rise to the challenge, Tony had quite a difficult time. For one thing, he had to remind himself not to say something that would reveal anything incriminating, and for another, he had to phrase everything he said in a way that would appear to be one thing but actually mean another.

On the second day of surveillance, he had mastered some codes. If he wanted to talk freely to Pepper, he’d adopt the huskiest voice he could manage and say, “I need to be alone with you. I miss you,” or some variation of it. And if he wanted to talk to the other soldiers, he’d say, “Hey, come over here a sec. I want to show you something.”

They also all took turns babysitting Tony in pairs. Sometimes it would be Peter and Rhodey, other times it would be Natasha and Pepper.

Tony always enjoyed being babysat by the latter duo. What’s not to love about the fact that he was surrounded by attractive women who volunteered to teach him self-defense?

“Did they not teach you how to block a punch in the South?” Natasha said, not masking her obvious enjoyment at the sight of Tony clutching his bleeding nose.

And Tony always milked the injury for more than it was worth, letting Pepper patch him up like the dutiful fiancé that she was.

“You know I love you, right?” he said when she handed him an ice pack.

“I love you too.” Pepper sounded like she meant it but her eyes told him exactly how irritated she was.

Days with Peter and Rhodey, on the other hand, were always unpredictable. One time, they were invited to Mrs. Buchanan’s house next door to fix her TV. Her son, a pre-school teacher named Bucky was very curious as to how Tony managed to court the Captain all the way from the South.

So, Tony ended up having to come up with a courtship story on the spot while Peter added his own ad-libs and Rhodey tried not to strangle them both.

“What I’d really love to do with Pep—I mean, Virginia, now that we’re physically in the same place is to dance with her.”

Bucky’s eyes lit up. “Ah!” then he got into some kind of weird tribal dance that took Tony aback.

“No, no! Not ritual dancing. Just plain slow dancing. You know, the romantic kind.” Tony stuck his hand out and started slow dancing with an invisible partner, but from the looks he was getting, he might as well have been naked again. “Wait. You guys don’t slow dance?”

Peter then took time to explain. “Our dances are fast and upbeat. They must use energy in order to give energy, to praise our great leader, to signal the setting and rising of the sun, to honor the moon. A slow dance does not satisfy the requirement.”

“But slow dancing is—you’re kidding!” Tony was not only horrified to learn that even their dances were highly regulated but also proceeded to spend the entire afternoon teaching them all how to slow dance.

Tony’s evenings were different all together. It was probably the only time he could genuinely be himself. In the safety of Pepper’s bedroom, he wasn’t Steve Rogers, a highly decorated North Titanian Avenger and mechanic, but just Tony Stark, a lost South Titanian who really wanted to go home and get his revenge on Obadiah Stane.

“Why did you decide to stop making weapons?” Pepper asked him one night.

“I guess I just woke up one day and realized I didn’t want a body count to be my only legacy,” Tony found himself admitting. It was the first time he said it out loud or to anybody for that matter. He hadn’t even said it to his A.I. Jarvis and Jarvis knows all of Tony’s dirty secrets. “I think Obie found out what I was planning and didn’t want me to get in the way of his hefty pay check.”

Tony was slightly surprised with himself for telling that to Pepper, a North Titanian, of all people. Did it mean that he trusted her with that side of himself, the side he was ashamed of? Or was it simply because he was never going to see her again after he leaves?

Of the two possible reasons, Tony liked the former more than the latter.

“Do you ever think that sometimes?” Tony asked her. “That you killed people more than you saved?”

He couldn’t see her face but he could almost hear her thinking.

“Sometimes… But mostly, I… I wonder what it would be like to live a life outside of the military.” Tony stayed silent and waited for her continue. “I was once an art major. I studied in Switza.” Switza was a country very famous for being politically neutral and as such, citizens from every country were welcome. It was no wonder she had some books written in Switz.

She came from a military family and was fortunate enough to have a father who allowed her to go to art school. But she was on her final year when her brother, who was a lieutenant, died in the field. And so, she felt that she had no choice other than to return and choose a military path so that there would be someone to continue the family legacy.

“Don’t misunderstand. I love my country and I would do anything to protect my fellow Northerners,” she said and then trailed off.

“But you can’t stop imagining what it would be to live a normal life,” Tony finished for her.

“Yeah,” he heard her whisper. Then, she turned in her bed, her hand dangling on the side Tony shared.

Tony took a risk and reached out to squeeze it. “Me too.”

She didn’t kill him for touching her.

…

The night Tony was due to leave, he prepared a farewell dinner party for the team using money he earned as a mechanic.

“How did you manage to keep this a secret from us?” Rhodey asked, marveling at the dishes laid out on the table. 

“Easy. I asked Natasha not to tell anyone and to help me out.” Tony raised a hand and a passing Natasha gave him a high-five. She had warmed considerably over the course of the week and Tony was no longer as scared of her as he was on Day 1. “Go ahead, dig in!”

Peter was already serving himself a plate of mashed potatoes when Pepper said, “You didn’t have to do this you know.”

Tony smiled. “I know. But I wanted to show you guys my gratitude. I mean, your team has been very kind to me and welcomed me like a brother.” He left out the part wherein they trusted him and didn’t turn him in to the government. Even Rhodey wasn’t hostile towards him anymore. And although Tony was happy to leave this place, that didn’t mean he was going to miss them.

“I prepared a little special something for you too, babe,” he said, knowing how much she hated it when he used Southern pet names for her just as much as he hated it when she called him peach. He led her out of the kitchen and to the living room. “Unfortunately, North Titan doesn’t have a slow enough song for this, but I’ll make do.”

Tony started swaying his hips and Pepper narrowed her eyes at him, clearly finding him strange. “Do you need to use the bathroom?”

Tony grinned at her and continued dancing. “In the South and in other countries, couples do what’s called a slow dance. But you studied in Switza, so, you probably already know what I’m talking about. And I figured, since you and I are going to get married,” he winked, “I wanted to do it with you just this once.” He extended a hand to her and Pepper took it, albeit a little hesitantly.

“Just relax and let me lead.” Tony placed her hand on his shoulder and linked her other hand with his. Then, with his other hand on her waist, he hummed a soft tune as he taught her a slow dance. Pepper was a natural which only confirmed Tony’s theory that she had probably danced a slow dance in Switza before or at least saw one in action.

“This is… nice,” she commented and Tony had to agree. If he closed his eyes, he could almost imagine he and Pepper in some fancy restaurant, with a live band playing. He couldn’t help thinking that if things were simpler, he’d pursue this amazing badass woman.

Then, feeling a little daring, Tony surprised Pepper by twirling her around and then dipping her low towards the ground. His face was inches away from hers and if Tony wanted to, he could kiss her. He could see Pepper was entertaining the thought as well because her eyes darted to his own lips. Briefly, Tony wondered if she’d punch him if he made a move, but before he could make a decision, Natasha interrupted them, calling out from the kitchen, “Would you two stop flirting with each other for a minute and come and eat?”

“You hungry?” Tony asked Pepper, pulling her up. She avoided his eye and tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear.

“Yes.”

…

After the small gathering, it was time to go. Tony and Pepper were going to take a car out to the dock while the rest of the team would stay in the house.

“Captain, I want to show you something Steve made me!” said Peter which was code for a private word. He and Pepper disappeared in her bedroom while Tony was left with Rhodey and Natasha.

“What do you think?” Tony asked Rhodey, “Think we’ll make a successful married couple?” Think we’ll make it out okay?

Rhodey gave him a soft smile. “I think you and her will be fine.”  I do.

Even Natasha looked a little sad at having to see him go. “She’s tougher than she looks, you know.” She’ll take care of you.

Pepper and Peter returned and Tony clasped Peter in a silent brotherly hug. Then, he and Pepper got in the car.

They parked the car some distance from the dock and walked the rest of the way. Natasha’s contact was a scary looking guy named Fury (aptly named, in Tony’s opinion) who wore an eyepatch and demanded the calling cards as soon as he saw them.

Pepper, however, wasn’t intimidated. She gave him two cards and said, “You get the rest when you bring me back safely.”

The man didn’t seem too happy at that. “Well, come on then,” he grunted, motioning at Pepper and Tony to follow him up the fishing boat.

It didn’t take long before the boat was moving across the waters and Tony was hours away from freedom.

“You see that over there?” Fury pointed to the distance at a small speck of light in the distance. Another boat. “That’s our target.”

Pepper leaned back against the railing and glanced at Tony. “Your family is going to be so relieved to see you again.”

Tony shook his head, keeping his eyes trained on that boat. “I don’t have family left. My parents died in a car accident when I was young and I only have my assistant and my robots. There’s Obie who was like a father figure to me but clearly, he didn’t see it that way.” He still couldn’t wrap his head around it and turned to Pepper. “And you know what’s so twisted about it all? My dad was his best friend! He’s my godfather! He raised me when my parents died. How do you take care of someone for more than a decade and decide you want to kill them? What was his thought process?”

Pepper touched Tony’s arm, calming him somewhat. “I don’t have the answers you’re looking for. But I do know this: he’ll pay for what he did to you. And I know that you’ll use the proper channels and put him behind bars.”

Tony’s shoulders fell. “Yeah, but the evidence in the warehouse was destroyed. And the members of the Ten Rings are dead. And my witnesses, AKA you guys, can’t even provide a statement.”

She squeezed his arm. “You’ll find a way. Just like you found a way out of North Titan.”

“I’m still here.” Tony reminded her. “By the way, what are you gonna tell the neighborhood once they find out I’m gone?”

“That we broke off our engagement.”

“And if they ask why?”

“Because I discovered you had another woman in the South and I threatened to castrate you so you ran off.”

“Yep. Sounds like something I would do.”

Suddenly the sounds of a police siren filled the air and Tony and Pepper looked to its source. It was one of the coast guard’s patrol boat!

Fury quickly grabbed both Pepper and Tony and dragged them down the lower deck where they stored the fish crates. “Get down there! I’ll handle it.” He shut the door, leaving Pepper and Tony with no other choice than to descend.

They crouched low with their backs hunched almost as if that could give them the cover they needed. But it was futile, Tony knew. If the coast guard did so much as check the lower level of the boat, they’d get caught.

Neither of them said a word as they kept an ear out to listen for any sign of the coast guard appearing or retreating.  It seemed to be the former because Tony heard a pair of feet hit the deck and begin a slow pace.

“Weren’t you notified?” Tony heard the coast guard say, “No fishing from 8 PM to 2 AM.”

Fury made a show of having neglected to read the notice before going out. “I apologize, Lieutenant. But… aren’t night patrols usually done by Ensign Rocket?”

“He’s out sick,” spat the Lieutenant, annoyed. “So, I’m stuck doing his job.”

There was a creak right outside the door and Tony heard the Lieutenant ask, “What’s behind here?”

“Fish crates.”

Tony began to panic. He hissed at Pepper, “What are we gonna do?”

Pepper didn’t answer.

“You have a plan right?”

“Maybe.”

“MAYBE?”

Pepper glanced at the door and then at Tony.

“Well?”

Another creak and they both heard the sound of the door being opened.

Pepper acted.

The next thing Tony knew, he was pushed back against a crate that reeked of fish with Pepper’s hands on his face and her lips on his.

His eyes were open in shock. What was she thinking kissing him at this time and place! He tried to push her off but the woman was strong and kept their mouths locked together. What the hell did they feed women in North Titan?  

Tony heard the patrolman make a sound of surprise and then abruptly shut the door. Pepper let him go and sighed in relief.

“I can’t believe that worked,” she said, more to herself than to the man she just kissed.

Tony gaped at her. He opened to his mouth to speak but they heard the familiar creaking sound again and Tony once more found himself being kissed. Except this time, Pepper had moved and deposited herself on his lap, almost straddling him, and her hands were in his hair. Tony let out a surprised squeak.

“HEY! What do you two think this is?! Get off each other!”

…

The Lieutenant was pretty shocked at having found a young engaged couple hiding below the deck of a fishing boat. He was even more scandalized at seeing them kissing.

“But you know how young people are,” Fury chuckled, shaking his head like he was used to this kind of licentious behavior. “Ensign Rocket didn’t mind as long as I brought them back safe and sound and with their dignities still intact, of course.”

Pepper laughed too and batted her eyes at the patrolman. “My company’s going back to the border soon.” She wrapped her hands around Tony’s arm. “We just wanted some time alone.”

The Lieutenant scoffed. He fixed his eyes at Tony and said, “You should know better than to give in to your passions!”

Tony could do nothing but stammer an apology.

“Turn this boat around at once,” the Lieutenant ordered.

“What—” Pepper clamped a hand over Tony’s mouth. She answered for him, “Yes, Lieutenant. Right away.”

The Lieutenant returned to his patrol boat and Fury turned the boat around as instructed.

“What the hell are you doing?” Tony said, grabbing Fury by his clothes. Fury shoved him away with one hand. “I’m preserving my business, that’s what.”

Tony looked mournfully at the boat he was supposed to get on. He was so close!

…

On their way back to the where they parked the car, Tony fumed. “That’s it? You give him the remaining half of our payment for a lousy job? He didn’t even get me to the target boat!”

“He got us back safely like we asked. So, I paid him for doing his job.”

“You’re just—We’re just going back? Is this how a Captain deals with a failed mission? Retreat? You promised you’d get me out!”

“I’m sorry!” Pepper said, sounding equally frustrated. She didn’t bother looking back at him when she apologized, though. “We just have to find another way.”

Tony scoffed and ran ahead of Pepper, blocking her path to prevent her from walking away from him. “Just like you found a way to distract the Lieutenant? What the hell were you thinking grabbing me like that?”

Pepper put her hands on her hips. “Would you rather we danced?”

“Dance? What the hell are you talking about?”

“Peter talked to me before we left. He said that if ever you and I get caught there are two things your people do in South Titan that have a 99% chance of distracting the enemy: dancing and kissing. He says those are your country’s secret weapons.”

“WHAT!?”

“And he was right because when you danced with me, I felt a little different… weird and tingly, somehow.” She shivered in recollection and then pointed an accusatory finger at Tony. “I don’t know how slow dancing works but you knew it would have that effect on me! That’s why you insisted we do it!”

Tony barely registered the drop of his jaw. She felt tingly? He decided to tackle this one at a time. “You believed—you based your plan off of what a fifteen year-old kid learned from outdated TV shows and movies?!”

“He’s eighteen and kissing worked, didn’t it? Kissing distracted that man and we got out safely!”

“You call that a kiss?” Tony was bewildered. How was smashing her mouth to his a kiss?

Pepper was starting to lose her patience with him now and she raised her voice. “Is there any other kind?”

“Yeah!” Tony cried, raising his voice in turn.

“Well, what are they?!”

“You want to know?! You really want to know?!”

They were both shouting now with no one to overhear them.

“Of course I want to know! How else am I gonna defend myself against your secret weapon when—” Tony cut her off, having stepped right up to her, grabbed her face, and pressed their lips together.

Tony was good at a lot of things: engineering, making stuff blow up, kissing. And if Pepper’s reaction to having his tongue do its magic in her mouth was any indication, he was doing a pretty good job at educating her on a Stark-approved kiss.

He could feel the tension in her shoulders slowly dissipate, her body relaxing against his. Her hands which had been balled into tiny little strong fists were now gripping the front of his clothes.

Tony broke away abruptly, leaving both of them with chests heaving, trying to catch their breaths. He looked at her, swollen lips and all, and said, “That’s how you kiss.” Then he stormed off which was a bad idea in hindsight because they were both going home together in the same car, anyway. So, it sort of defeated the purpose of him storming off so he could have the last word when she ended up finding him waiting for her with his back against the car and his arms folded across his chest.

Pepper stopped a meter away from him, wanting to say something but not really knowing where to start. She had taken her time walking back, Tony noted, probably to gather her thoughts which worked well on Tony’s end because he likewise needed the time to think about what the hell just happened.

It wasn’t just the fact that they had failed in sending him home or that Obadiah was still running loose in South Titan. It wasn’t even the revelation that Peter actually believed kissing and dancing were the two greatest weapons the South ever invented. It was all of those things combined with that damn kiss and the damn dance and the fact that Pepper just admitted to him that she felt a little tingly dancing with him! What the hell did that mean?

They both ended up apologizing to each other at the same time.

“You go first.”

“No, you go.”

They chuckled awkwardly.

Tony licked his lips and took the plunge. “I’m sorry. I… I know it wasn’t your fault. You couldn’t have known there’d be coast guard. I just—I’m frustrated because my ex father figure is out there, getting away with kidnapping and attempted murder and I’m stuck here fully alive and not able to do anything about it. So, I took it all out on you. It’s not fair. You’ve done so much for me and I should be thanking you.”

Pepper waved his apology away. “No! Your anger was totally justified. It’s my job to make sure what happened didn’t happen and I handled it very poorly. I’m so ashamed.” She ducked her head, looking at the ground.

“I think you did okay.”

Pepper glanced up at him sheepishly. “Let’s just agree to keep everything that happened between the two of us.”

“Well, what are we gonna say to the rest of the Company when we get back?”

“We’ll just tell them that the Lieutenant caught us but we convinced him that we were…” Pepper took a step forward, shrugging her shoulders, “Any ideas?”

Tony thought about it for a moment. “We convinced the Lieutenant that we were simply an engaged couple looking for romantic time under the moonlight.”

“Yeah! That makes sense! Leave the kiss out of the narrative.”

Tony nodded, taking a step closer to her. “The gang can’t know, especially Rhodey or Natasha, because they’d kill me if they found out I ever touched you without your consent.”

“No, but you did have my consent. I mean, I asked you to tell me what the other kinds of kisses were and you, well, you showed me.”

“That’s true.”

“And I did touch you without consent first. On the boat,” Pepper pointed out, taking a step towards him.

Tony took one as well. “But you did that to save our lives, so that’s sort of excusable, you know, in that noble, sacrificial way.”

Pepper eyed him and slowly asked, “So, you didn’t mind me kissing you?”

“Not if you didn’t mind me kissing you.”

“I didn’t.”

“Well, neither did I.”

“Okay.”

“That’s settled.”

They both looked at each other, suddenly aware that they were only a few inches apart now. Almost against his will, Tony’s eyes flickered to Pepper’s mouth and then back up to meet her gaze.

Pepper licked her lips and then motioned to the car. Breaking the silence, she asked him, “Do you want to drive back?”

“Sure!”

…

Everybody except Peter took everything Pepper and Tony said at face value when the latter two narrated the failed escape attempt.

They were all gathered in Pepper’s bedroom, Natasha, Rhodey, and Peter were on the floor on Tony’s mattress while Tony and Pepper were on Pepper’s bed.

“So, he just let you guys go?” Peter said in disbelief.

Tony nodded and tried not to look at Pepper. “Yeah, if you can believe it!”

“So, what’s the next plan?” asked Rhodey. “You can’t very well stay here or else we might just have to fake wedding plans this time.”

Natasha then spoke, “And we also can’t keep delaying our side mission. We report for duty at the outpost line when the Companies switch in three months. From today until then, we have to link Obadiah Stane to Ronan and find evidence of Ronan’s dealing with the Ten Rings.”

“Wait, that’s it!” Pepper cried out, clasping Tony by his shoulder. “You have to come with us when we switch companies in three months. I can personally bring you to the South Titan’s side of the zone. You’ll find soldiers there. Your country’s soldiers. They’ll get you home safely.”

Tony scratched the back of his head. Did he hear that right? Three months?

“It could work,” said Peter, “Once the company switches, no other military units are allowed entry into the demilitarized zone. We just have to sneak you in is all.”

“Tony?” It was Natasha who addressed him this time and Tony snapped out of his thoughts. “Huh? Sorry. I just… wow, three months. That’s… that’s a long time.” Who knows what damage Obie can accomplish in that duration?

“I know,” Pepper said sadly, placing a hand on his shoulder.  “But it’s the next best plan we’ve got.”

Tony sighed. “Alright. But I can’t stay inside this place anymore. I want to be able to leave the house by myself.”

“Tony, that’s risky,” said Pepper.

“I know! But I need to get out. If I stay here and avoid Mrs. Buchanan’s snoopy eyes from the backyard, I’m gonna go crazy! I also think she wants to set Steve and Bucky up.”

“If you go out, the neighbors don’t need the excuse of broken machines to talk to you,” Natasha pointed out. “Can you handle five or ten Mrs. Buchanans?”

Tony shook his head. “I can’t. But Steve Rogers can. He’s an Avenger, you know!”

…

…

…

Everybody in the neighborhood just loved Steve Rogers, especially the elderly men. They gravitated to Tony whenever he went out of the house by himself and asked him a lot of questions about Captain Potts, the South, and mostly about his secret missions.

“I’m sorry, gentlemen. If I tell you, I’ll have to kill you,” Tony said in his best spy voice and watched with absolute delight as the elderly men sputtered and said words along the lines of “We’re only kidding.”

“And I liked what you did to your mustache,” said Mr. Lee, a man in his late 70s who reminded Tony a lot of Hugh Hefner. “Is that the latest trend in the South?”

Tony smiled smugly and stroked his facial hair. “This old thing? Yeah! The goatee’s guaranteed to garner admiration. Why do you think the Captain fell in love with me? One look at my picture and she said yes to my proposal.”

“Really?” What came after that was a group of old men who sported matching goatees with Steve Rogers.

These old timers were actually fun to talk to, Tony discovered. And it was almost therapeutic, having these elderly men give him advice in a way that Howard Stark never did. Oh, sure, they gave him a lot of tips on how to do his wedding night properly or how to do the laundry and Tony in turn would tell them all the trends back in the South.

He was careful, though, in case law enforcements or Ronan came and arrested him for encouraging pro-South Titanian sentiments. Once, Tony thought he even saw a suspicious looking man follow him while he was outside. But whenever he looked back, the man was always busy doing something else.

When Tony wasn’t out socializing with the Old Boys Society, as Pepper called them, he taught Rhodey and Peter South Titanian games. Sure they knew all about soccer and basketball. But they didn’t know about Paper Football.

Peter got a hand of it pretty quickly while Rhodey just plain sucked.

“I hate this game,” the War Machine muttered.

“You just need to practice. It’s alright. We all don’t get it the first time.”

“Except Peter,” Rhodey said.

“Peter is an anomaly. I swear, it’s like he’s good at everything. Have you seen him do a back flip?”

Peter shrugged bashfully. “It’s just a useless thing I learned watching TV. Hey, now that you have some time, can you teach me how to make a robot?”

And that was how Tony, with Peter’s assistance, ended up creating various robots. Rhodey was very pleased with his remote controlled toy car and Peter couldn’t get enough of his rolling BB8 (Tony assured him he’d get the reference when he graduated from Star Wars Episode V and on to more recent films).

Tony also made Natasha and Pepper matching knives.

“I don’t have much here in terms of money, but I have my hands.” Tony explained when he presented it to them in the confines of Pepper’s bedroom. “Think of it as payment for what you guys are doing for me.”

Natasha thanked him and moved to test the weapon out in the yard with Peter offering to act as an assailant.

Tony was left with Pepper who was holding the knife and testing its weight. She probably found it lacking and Tony felt a desire to explain. “It’s a little rough, though. I don’t have the right tools.”

“It’s beautiful,” said Pepper, catching Tony off guard. “It isn’t too heavy and my hand wraps around it perfectly. Thank you.”

Tony’s heart lightened. He only held her hand a couple of times but he remembered enough of how big it was to design the hilt of the knife to suit her. “You’re welcome.”

“May I ask why we girls got a knife and not a robot?” She raised a brow playfully.

“Oh. I didn’t think you guys would like them.” To be honest, Tony thought robots too frivolous for these two practical women. “The robots are just toys. I wanted to make you something that was useful, you know, something to protect you while you’re on the job.” He ran a hand through his hair nervously which didn’t make sense to him, because he was never nervous in front of women. “I may not be able to arm you with the most advanced weapons or protect you from the Ten Rings, but a knife… I can protect you with this knife”

“I see.” Pepper smiled and it warmed Tony’s chest.

“If you want a robot, though, I can still make you one.”

“No,” Pepper said, touching his arm gratefully. “I appreciate it a lot, Tony.” Then she left him to join Natasha in the yard.

Tony stared after her. Things had become amicable and more comfortable between him and Pepper. It probably had something to do with the fact that they now shared a bed together. Never in his life did Tony think he’d share a bed with a woman and simply sleep together.

Ronan drove them to do it, of course, because he was merciless with his monthly random inspections. On Tony’s second month in South Titan, he had barged in the middle of the night, not even waiting for them to open the front door and instead ordered Nebula to use her all-access key.

Pepper, a light sleeper, had woken up to the sound of someone trashing the place, recognized Nebula’s and Ronan’s voices, and kicked Tony awake.

Tony groaned in response.

She kicked him again and he raised his head and blinked owlishly at her. She waved him over to her, hissing “Ronan is here!”

That slapped the sleep out of Tony really quick. He scrambled out of his mattress and climbed into bed, getting under the covers with her. “What do we do? Should I kiss you? Should I lose my clothes?”

Pepper pushed his head down against the pillow. “Pretend we’re sleeping!”

Tony spooned her and they both feigned sleep just as Ronan entered their bedroom without so much as a knock.

Tony “pretended” to wake up first and made a very good show of complaining that they ruined his beauty sleep. Then Pepper stirred with a groan, rubbing her eyes.

“Go back to sleep, hon, I’ll handle it.” Tony said, rubbing her arm. Then he got up and did his best to give the Kree an intimidating look, which wasn’t easy to do in pajamas and messy hair. He crossed his arms and addressed Ronan who at least had the decency not to cross the threshold of the bedroom. Nebula stood behind him.

“What the hell, man? This couldn’t wait until the morning?”

“We apologize, Mr. Rogers,” Nebula began, clearly just as annoyed with Ronan for waking her up for this.

“Random inspection,” said Ronan simply. “You may not be used to it having stayed a majority of your life in South Titan, but here in the North, we make sure to visit all houses and make sure everybody is following the rules. Nebula, search the other rooms.”

Nebula looked like she would rather be sleeping but she turned on her heel and left, leaving Ronan alone with Tony and a “sleeping” Pepper.

As soon as Nebula was out of earshot, Ronan growled at Tony, “I know you’re not an Avenger. I know Stane wants you dead. What I don’t know is why. Who are you?”

Tony tried not to look too pleased at that. So, he was right. Ronan didn’t know his name and he either didn’t ask Stane or Stane was ignoring him. “I told you, I’m Steve Rogers. Now, this Stane, on the other hand, I don’t know that person.” Tony brought a hand over his mouth and pretended to be disturbed. “You mean someone’s out to get me? Whoa. I thought when I retired from the spy business, I’d be safe. Thanks for the warning, major! I didn’t know you cared so much!” Tony patted him on the arm. “But I’ll be fine. My future wife’s a Captain. She’ll make sure nothing happens to me.”

Ronan’s eyes landed on Pepper’s sleeping form. Then it swept over the room and landed on the mattress on the floor. “What’s with the extra bed?”

Tony saw it too and explained, “That.” He laughed. “Yeah, we can get a little rough during the lovemaking. Sometimes we end up on the floor. The mattress just cushions our fall, you know.” He winked at Ronan.

Ronan gave him a deadpan look. Nebula returned, saving him from replying. “No counterfeit goods here, Major.”

“I’ll see you on the next inspection, Rogers.” Without another word, Ronan turned and marched out. Nebula apologized to Tony and then hurried out after the major.

Finally alone in the bedroom, Pepper threw the blankets off herself and threw a pillow at Tony, hitting him on the head. “Rough lovemaking?”

“I had to think of something!”

Pepper groaned and went out of the room to survey the damage Ronan did to her house. The living room and the kitchen were a mess.

Pepper buried her face in her hands and Tony, knowing she wouldn’t be having so much trouble if it weren’t for him, apologized.

Pepper shook her head. “Don’t. Ronan did this. Not you.” She took a deep breath and then exhaled.

“He’s going to keep the random inspections going, isn’t he?”

Pepper nodded. “Come on. Let’s get back to bed. We’ll clear this up in the morning.”

Tony nodded, following her. When he made a move to lie on the mattress on the floor, Pepper said, “I think we should share a bed from now on. Ronan’s becoming less predictable and just in case he decides to kidnap you in the middle of the night, I need to feel you beside me.” She blushed, realizing what her words could be misconstrued for. She stammered, “I mean, I won’t be able to tell if you’re sleeping down there and—”

“No, I get it.” Tony knew how much it took for Pepper to propose such a thing. She valued the privacy her bed afforded her; it was the only thing she had left to herself in this house, after all. He wasn’t going to tease her for the comment. “I just… Are you sure? I don’t want to make you uncomfortable.”

“You already told Ronan we have rough sex. My house is a mess. I don’t think it can get any more uncomfortable than that. I’m also a soldier, you know. I’ve slept surrounded by men before.”

Tony couldn’t argue with that and climbed in next to her. She had her back turned to him and Tony was able to find a position wherein there was ample space between them. Pepper didn’t say anything more and so, Tony was left staring up at the ceiling.

This close to her, he could hear her breathe easily, like they hadn’t just been visited by an angry, corrupt Kree. How was she not even pissed off at the guy? He broke in her house, ruined her living room.

Tony sighed. It was no use. He wouldn’t be able to sleep.

Instead of mulling over Ronan, Tony decided to get up and fix the mess outside. It’s the least he could do for Pepper.

The next day, Pepper’s eyes were wide as saucers when she saw the living room and the kitchen.

“Did you do this?”

Tony nodded. “Couldn’t sleep last night.”

Pepper couldn’t help the grateful smile from appearing on her face. “You didn’t have to do this by yourself. You could’ve waited. I could’ve helped.”

“Yeah, well, it’s partly my fault that he’s bothering us. So… I figured, I should at least fix something. But don’t get used to this, though. I mean, this is my first time doing housekeeping and I think I did okay.” He was stunned when Pepper hugged him.

“Thank you,” she whispered and then quickly stepped back.

Tony immediately missed her. “Yeah, no problem.”

That hug was just another sign that things had changed between them. Pepper initiated touches now, both in public and private which made Tony wonder if she had either gotten used to the whole fake engagement thing or she secretly liked him far more than she admitted.

Weeks after Tony gave her the knife, he and Pepper went out to go to the market together.

“This is nice,” Tony said teasingly, glancing down at their entwined hands and then back at Pepper who was trying not to give him the satisfaction of seeing her blush.

“This is for your protection,” she reminded him but the smile on her face told Tony she was enjoying this a little bit too.

They were walking along what the street necessitating their very public act of “couple-ship” as Peter called it.

As they passed each store, there always seemed to be someone inside or an owner who’d greet Pepper and have a short word with them.

“You’re quite the popular girl,” Tony said to her after a salon owner waved goodbye at them.

“You do know it’s not me they’re interested in, don’t you?”

“What are you talking about? Of course it’s you!”

Pepper laughed. “They use me as the reason to approach us but haven’t you noticed it’s you they end up interacting with?”

Almost as if the universe wanted to prove a point, a hardware owner waved them inside his store.

“Hi, Thor,” said Pepper, greeting the giant, beautiful, muscled man. “How are you?”

“Very well, Captain,” he said, “I heard about your engagement,” Then, Thor turned to Tony and wasn’t shy at all in inspecting him head to toe. “So, this is the person you rejected me for. I met Captain Potts when she came in looking for a hammer to fix her roof. I, of course, offered her the services of my very special hammer.” Tony glanced at Pepper trying not to let the amusement show on his face. Thor didn’t notice and went on, “That’s as far as she’d let me, though. I guess she likes her men small and tiny.”

Tony’s mouth was already open and about to make a very smart reply to the slight this guy just made on his height when Pepper grabbed him by the arm and spoke for him. “Yep! I do. He’s so cute that way. Uhh, well, we have to go. I’ll see you around, Thor.”

Once outside, Tony burst out laughing. “His very special hammer? Is that what he calls his—”

“And now you know why I’m not with him.”

“But he has it all wrong. I may be cute on the outside but underneath these clothes my hammer is—”

Pepper raised her hand to hit him but Tony caught it. Before he could say something, however, he noticed a familiar man, bald and muscular, watching them suspiciously from behind a zargnut cart. When he noticed Tony looking at him, he pretended to be very interested in the zargnuts.

Tony turned Pepper around so she had her back to his chest. Then he hugged her from behind while whispering in her ear, “See the guy behind the zargnut cart? I’ve seen him before. I think he’s been following me.”

“I’ve noticed him too,” Pepper replied before facing Tony and putting her arms around him. “But he’s not with Ronan.”

Tony pretended that he found what she said funny and then he asked, “Who then?”

“My dad.”

Tony stilled. “Your dad?”

Pepper lifted a hand and ran her fingers through his hair, fixing it. He really needed a haircut. “If my theory is correct, he’s heard about us and sent Drax. He’s a really good tracker, but staying inconspicuous is not something he can do.”

A sly grin grew on Tony’s face and he stroked Pepper’s cheek. They were both experts at the whole PDA thing by now and were no longer embarrassed about the small things they do. “Since we have an audience, maybe we should give him something to report to your dad then.” Leaning close, his mouth inches away from hers, he whispered “When I say ‘go,’ we run.” Then he gave her a small peck on her cheek. “Three.” Another kiss on her other cheek. “Two.” He made the last one a long kiss on her lips and then he said against her mouth, “One. Go!” He grabbed her hand and they both ran, weaving through the crowds of people, trying to lose the tail they had.

They ended up in front of a store and they quickly went inside to hide.

“Welcome to Tanaleer Tivan’s. I’m Tanaleer Tivan. How may I help you?”

Tony and Pepper whirled around to find a man with silver hair welcoming them. They looked at their surroundings and found themselves inside a clothing store.

“Yes, we’re getting married soon and I wanted to buy her some clothes.” Tony winked at Pepper and urged her to go “peruse” over the selection while he stayed near the window and kept an eye out. Tony stood behind the curtains, eyes scanning the street.

Behind him, Tivan was telling Pepper, “If you’re getting married, I have a collection you might be interested in.”

Tony risked a quick glance away from the streets to look at Pepper. She was being pulled into a room and he turned his attention back out the window again. A flower cart just passed by but no sign of Drax.

Maybe they lost him? Tony shook his head, telling himself to focus. Drax was a tracker. He may not find them now but he’d find them eventually.

Abandoning the window, Tony turned around and inspected the clothes. Maybe he and Pepper should disguise themselves to throw Drax off their scent. Why did her dad even send him to track Tony? He had dealt with protective fathers before, even angry daddies, but sending a tracker after him was a new level entirely.

Tivan appeared again and with an excited grin on his face told Tony to follow him. He led Tony to the same door Pepper disappeared behind which turned out to be a large fitting room. 

“I think you’ll be very pleased with this one, sir.”

Tony stared at him and then at the only curtain that was drawn back. “Honey? You ready?”

“This is ridiculous,” came Pepper’s reply.

“Why? Is it that bad?”

There was no answer.

“Come on! It can’t be as bad as me getting arrested in a towel, can it?”

Pepper pulled the curtain back.

Tony didn’t have time to prepare himself for the sight. His eyes widened and his lips parted. No, it wasn’t as bad as him getting arrested naked. That particular situation was just embarrassing. Pepper dressed in lingerie was anything but embarrassing.

He heard the Tivan murmur “I told you so” to him before thankfully leaving them alone.

Pepper put her hands on her hips and shot him a pointed look, almost daring him to say something.

Tony resisted the urge to lick his lips. Instead he lamely gave her a thumb’s up. “It’s... nice.”

Pepper raised a brow. “Nice?”

“You look hot.”

She frowned at the unfamiliar slang. “Hot?”

Tony forgot she didn’t understand South Titanian slang. He listed some synonyms, instead. “Attractive. Sexy. Also a little intimidating. You should dress up like that more often.” Both of Pepper’s eyebrows shot up and Tony quickly rephrased, “I mean when you’re future husband’s around. Because it’s not an outfit he would find disagreeable. I think if anything—he, I mean I, cause I am your future husband, I would very much enjoy seeing you in that on our wedding night and—you know what I mean! What I’m trying to say is it’s a good look. Um, turn around?”

Pepper threw her hands in the air and made a small turn.

“Oh, hold on.” Tony stepped forward and fixed the straps on her back that had turned over. His hands ran over the black lace and adjusted the loose straps as well.

“This isn’t your first time seeing a woman dressed like this, is it?” Pepper asked while he worked.

“You could say that.”

“So, you don’t deny it.”

He shot her a look in the mirror. “Why, are you jealous?”

“No!” She nudged him softly in the abdomen.

“It’s alright, babe. You’re the only woman I’ve been engaged to.”

“Fake engaged,” she reminded him in a low voice because even in public stores, Thanos’ government had ears.

“That too.” Hearing Tivan approaching again, Tony kissed Pepper on the shoulder.

The man clapped his hands at them enthusiastically. “You two make such a lovely couple!”

Pepper giggled and then excused herself to change out of the lingerie.

With the curtain drawn again, Tivan turned to Tony. “You two will have cute babies, I’m sure.”

“Yes, we will.” Tony cocked his head. “Now that I think about it, I’m not sure about the future Missus but I’d like a girl. Less chances she’ll turn out like me.”

“Why not have both a boy and a girl? Collect them all, I always say.”

Tony stared at Tivan. There was something odd about the way he spoke. He had nice taste in lingerie, though.

When Pepper was done and came out from behind the curtain, Tivan grabbed the piece of clothing in her hand and said, “I’ll wrap this up for you.”

Pepper and Tony exchanged startled looks.

“Oh, it’s really nice,” Pepper began.

Tony continued, “But we both want to talk about it first before buying it.”

Tivan wasn’t listening to them, though. He was already on his way to the counter causing the couple to hurry after him.

“We’ll recommend you to our friends, of course,” Pepper added. “But we were only window shopping and—”

Tivan put the lingerie in a paper bag and asked in a sweet smile, “Cash or credit?”

Pepper sighed. “We don’t—”

“Cash!” Tony blurted out and then suddenly put his arm around Pepper.

“What are you doing?” She nudged him again, getting him to move away as it clearly wasn’t the time for such displays, but he wouldn’t let go.

Tony widened his eyes at her and nodded his head in the direction of the window.

Pepper turned and saw what he had seen. Drax was right outside but hadn’t spotted them yet.

She immediately turned back to Tivan. “You know what, I think I’d like to try on other pieces in your collection. I just can’t get enough of the lace and the silk!”

They ended up purchasing three pieces in Tivan’s collection in their time hiding in his store and were very determined to keep it all a secret from the rest of the gang.

“Wow! You guys bought a lot of stuff,” said Rhodey when they returned. “Anything for us?”

“Nope,” Tony said quickly. “Sadly, they didn’t have anything in your size.”

Wary of letting them see what was inside the bag, Pepper said, “I’ll just put these away.” She bumped into Peter who was rounding a corner and she dropped one of the bags. Peter picked it up.

“Ooh. What’d you guys get?” He opened the bag before Pepper could snatch it from him. “Is this…?” He lifted a very skimpy red lingerie for everyone to see.

“It was his idea!” Pepper blurted, pointing at Tony.

Tony gaped at her. “Mine? I told you the red would clash with your hair!”

Rhodey was already howling in laughter in the background while Peter was blushing. Natasha on the other hand was looking at Pepper and Tony like she knew something they did not.

Pepper gave up and explained that Tivan wouldn’t let them go without buying something from the store.

Rhodey said, “I don’t know why you guys had to hide it from us. We get it. You two are engaged. It’s all good.” Nice disguise Rhodey added, mouthing the words to them.

What Rhodey said was true. It was their disguise but it somehow rung a little false in Tony’s head. He and Pepper were only pretending but why did it feel natural to hold her or to kiss her cheek and call her terms of endearment?

They’ve been doing this fake relationship for almost three months now and Pepper had likewise grown into it. Once when Tony had a sore throat, she insisted he try out their home remedy of gargling with salt water. When she had menstrual cramps, Tony did his best with a hot compress and comfort food.

She even got into the habit of berating Tony whenever he forgot to put down the toilet seat or dismantled her TV and toaster to make Peter another robot. During meal times, she’d urge Tony to eat more than he did and even go as far as feed him food from her own fork. He had even caught her staring at him once or twice when he’d leave the shower wrapped in only a towel—which was weird because she’d seen him that way once before and had never shown the slightest interest in his body. Tony had also lost count of the times he woke up spooning her in bed. Did she feel the same attraction between them that Tony felt?

Tony knew he wasn’t the only one who noticed. Peter called them Mom and Dad to tease them. Tony even heard Natasha comment about it when she thought Tony wasn’t around.

It was a few hours after he and Pepper returned from their shopping. He was heading straight for the bedroom he shared with her and was about to open the door when he heard muffled voices inside. He pressed his ear to the door and identified the voices as that of Natasha and Pepper.

“…how you looked at him earlier.”

“But that’s how I normally look,” Pepper replied lamely.

“I’m not concerned about your lingerie shopping with him. It’s more about the fact that your eyes follow him all the time. The two of you bicker and flirt like a real couple. You even treat him like he’s your actual husband and not your pretend fiancé!”

“It’s not my fault he’s a pig and leaves his clothes lying around.”

Natasha sighed heavily. “All I’m saying is you have to be careful. He’s still an Outlander who’s going to leave in two weeks. Nothing good will come from you falling in love with him.”

“I’m not in love with him!” Pepper said quickly and Tony couldn’t help but feel the heat of shame for ever thinking that she felt something for him. “But you’re right. I’ve compromised the mission.”

“Take some time away. Come with me. I have a lead on Ronan.” There was movement in the room and Tony quickly retreated to the kitchen.

They appeared a couple of minutes later, both carrying duffel bags.

“You guys going somewhere?” Tony asked them casually.

Natasha and Pepper exchanged glances and then Pepper said, “Yeah. We’re going to the city to look for wedding dresses. So don’t even ask to come with us. You know it’s against our custom for the groom to see the bride before the wedding.”

“Alright. I’ll stay. How long will you guys be gone?” The Company switches in two weeks or had they forgotten?

“Probably a week or two. Don’t worry, I’ll bring her back,” Natasha said. “We just don’t want to have to keep making the trip in case we don’t find anything we like. You know how long the drive takes. You okay staying here with Peter and Rhodey?”

Tony nodded. “Yep. I’ll be fine. I’m a big boy.”

…

Tony was not fine. Yes, he was a big boy, but he missed Pepper. He missed her organized mind, their petty arguments, and the feel of her in bed with him.

It was different living with two other guys—and by different, Tony meant it felt like he was back in the dorm in college.

Sure, the first couple of days were fun. They played card games, drank a lot, gambled amongst themselves.

On their fifth day, they played a drinking game and Rhodey, it turned out, was a lightweight and a chatterbox when drunk. Peter had to drag the guy to the bedroom just to prevent him from saying something Ronan might overhear.

With Rhodey snoring on Tony’s mattress, Peter and Tony spoke.

“Can I ask you something?”

“What?” Tony took a swig of his beer.

“What really happened between you and the Captain on the boat?”

Tony choked, almost spitting out the beer. Peter, on the other hand, was grinning from ear to ear. “I knew it! Something did happen!”

“Did your mother never tell you to be polite to your elders?”

“I don’t have a mother. Or a father. But I have you and the Captain and I want to know! Did you guys kiss?”

Tony avoided his gaze which was confirmation enough for Peter.

“I knew it! Are you two together? Is that why you were shopping for lingerie?” he dropped his voice to a whisper. “Have you two done it?”

Tony took another mouthful of beer and said, “It’s none of your business.”

“Of course, it’s my business! You two are my parents! Fake or not, I think you guys make a great couple.”

“You are far too invested in our fake relationship.”

Peter shrugged. “I guess. Maybe it’s because you guys are my only… what do you call it? Parent-figures?”

Tony softened at that. The kid was an orphan, just like him.

“What happened to your parents if you don’t mind me asking?”

Peter shook his head. “I don’t mind. I never knew them. I was raised in foster care as far as I can remember. And then, they said you could get out early if you joined the military.”

“And you did.”

“Yep. Best decision of my life. I mean, sure the military’s harsh but the foster care was worse. You know that musical Annie? Well, I was Annie. I even had a Mrs. Hannigan. I didn’t have a Sandy, though. Only a Groot.”

“A what?”

“It’s our plant. Since animals aren’t allowed, we got Groots instead.”

“I see,” said Tony but he didn’t really.

“Yeah, well, I had all of the things Annie had except… Hey!” Peter fixed him a wide smile, eyes alight like a light bulb just went off in his head. “Are you my Daddy Warbucks?!”

Tony immediately pressed his palms to his ears, cringing, “Don’t ever call me that again!”

“Why not? It fits! You’re rich, you came into my life all of a sudden, you’re falling in love with the Captain who’s Grace in this situation—”

“Kid, I’m not here to adopt you.”

“But you and the Captain are my mom and dad!”

“We’re only pretending.”

“It doesn’t seem like that. I think she really likes you. I can tell. She has all the signs in the movies.”

Recalling what he overhead between Pepper and Natasha, Tony said, “She doesn’t like me, kid. Trust me.”

Before Peter could argue some more, the room suddenly went dark.

“A blackout?” Tony asked.

Rhodey’s snore was the only reply.

“But we don’t normally get blackouts here,” said Peter and Tony felt him get up and feel his way around the room. Tony could see nothing; there wasn’t even light coming in from the window which told Tony that whatever affected their electricity affected the whole town too.

“Where are you going?” Tony hissed when he heard the door to the room open.

Peter then replied, “Something feels wrong. Stay here.” Then he heard Peter’s footsteps fade away.

Tony waited for a minute, Rhodey’s snores punctuating the silence. After hearing a surprised yelp from Peter outside, Tony decided to help the kid out before he hurt himself. He finished his bottle of beer, left it in the bed, got out of the room, and began feeling his way through the house.

His eyes gradually adjusted to the darkness but it was still quite a challenge to see. He bumped into Peter and was about to apologize but Tony felt the hard length of a gun on Peter’s hip.

As far as he remembered, Peter didn’t have a gun with him.

“Peter?”

Then Tony felt a strong jab at his abdomen and a cloth sliding over his head.

…

…

…

Tony woke up locked in an attic. He couldn’t see anything from the windows and the all the boxes around him contained only old throw pillows and clothes. There was nothing he could use to escape.

Trying out the door, he put his weight against it, hoping he’d be able to break it down. After three failed tries, he abandoned it, rubbing his shoulder. Why didn’t the team ever teach him how to get out of situations like this? What use was blocking a punch if he was locked in a room?

He sighed. He’d been kidnapped more times in North Titan than he has been in South Titan.

Tony looked around again. He could try to break the windows but they were too small for his body to fit through. What was worse was that he was pretty sure he really needed to pee.

There was only one thing left to do.

“HEY! LET ME OUT!” He banged his fist against the door. “I NEED TO USE THE BATHROOM! COME ON! IF YOU KEEP ME IN HERE, I’M GONNA HAVE NO CHOICE BUT TO PEE ON THE BOXES. I’M SERIOUS! SEE IF I CARE ABOUT WHAT’LL HAPPEN TO YOUR ANTIQUE THROW PILLOWS. I’M NOT HOLDING THIS IN!”

There was no response. Tony groaned and began to pace. He needed to think. The Ten Rings had to be behind this. Or Ronan. But why were they keeping alive? Did they need him for something? Weapons? Tony faced the door again. “HELL NO! I’M NOT MAKING YOU GUYS ANYTHING! THE ONLY THINGS YOU’LL GET OUT OF ME ARE PISS AND SHIT!”

Then Tony heard footsteps. He positioned himself beside the door, a throw pillow in hand.

The door swung open, revealing a green-skinned girl with red-streaked black hair. He hit her with the pillow but it barely threw her off. She advanced towards him and Tony backed himself against a wall.

“Hi!” he said, “I know you’re mad but I’m really not sorry for hitting you with the pillow. You can’t blame a guy. It’s all there is in here.”

The woman made face and then grabbed Tony by the arm and pinned his hand behind his back. “OW! OW!” Tony was getting real tired of this treatment.

“WHY ARE YOU NORTH TITANIAN WOMEN SO STRONG?!”

She dragged him out of the attic and down a flight of stairs. “HEY CAN I PEE FIRST?!” They passed a hallway until they arrived at a living room.

She forced Tony down on an armchair.

There was an elderly man seated opposite from Tony and he waved the woman away.

“That will be all, Gamora.”

“Yes, General,” said Gamora and she walked away, leaving Tony alone with the old man.

Somehow, being in front of this guy caused any urge to pee to disappear. He must be the Big Boss, the one who ran the show.

Tony gulped. “Are you Ronan’s boss?”

“I’ll ask the questions.”

Tony nodded. Talk now, he thought, die later.

“You are Tony Stark of Stark Industries, correct?” began the General, taking a file from the coffee table in front of them and opening it.

“Yes,” said Tony and saw that the file was all about him.

The General continued reading. “38 years old. Born in Malibu, South Titan. You were reported dead on June 6 but I can see that you are very much alive.”

“What?” Tony grabbed the file and scanned it. “What day is it today?”

“June 8,” the General replied.

“That bastard!” When Tony was going to get back, he was going to make Obie’s life a living hell! Then realizing something, he looked up at his captor. “Wait a minute. Today is the 8^th?” The company switch was scheduled on the 13^th. He had four days until the company switch.

“Why, do you have somewhere to be?” the General asked with a raised brow. When Tony didn’t reply, he took back the files and continued reading, “3 arrests for speed driving, 1 arrest for public disturbance, and another 2 arrests for public indecency. Why am I not surprised? You did make yourself known to the whole town in nothing but a towel. Why should an Outlander act any differently just because he’s in the North?”

“In my defense, I had just taken a bath when Ronan arrested me. Also I had no clothes.”

The General eyed him. “What was your purpose in approaching Captain Virginia Potts and living with her?”

Tony did a double take. “Purpose? You make it sound like I had a choice in the matter. I’m the victim of a jealous, greedy business partner who decided that he could just ignore years of friendship and trust. I was betrayed and kidnapped and sent here to be killed! I had no plans to meet Captain Potts at all.”

The General frowned. “What?”

“It was an accident meeting her! I was kidnapped and held hostage in a warehouse by the Ten Rings when Captain Potts happened to discover that warehouse and take down the bad guys. I mean, think about it,” Tony leaned close, elbows on his knees. If his next words were going to be his last, he needed to make them count. “I run a company in South Titan. We produce the most efficient weapons in the country and I hold the sole weapons contract with the South Titanian Military! And I’ll admit that I had decided on halting weapons manufacturing but why would I purposefully go to the North and approach Captain Potts? Sure she’s attractive and intelligent. She’s also frighteningly strong and incredibly dangerous. A single glare from her can stop any man in his tracks. But why would I risk my life and my company to approach her and live with her? To tell you the truth, I’m just a playboy, billionaire, and philanthropist who realized that making things that blow up wasn’t enough anymore. I want to help people, redefine the tech industry, improve lives! But Obadiah Stane, he’s my business partner, the murderous guy I told you about, decided to get me out of the way and Captain Potts found me and decided to help me out because she’s a decent human being.”

The General eyed Tony skeptically. “So, you’re saying this is all Captain Potts’ fault?”

Tony stared at him. “What? I didn’t say that. Weren’t you listening? It’s Obadiah Stane’s fault. It’s the Ten Rings’ fault. It’ll even be Ronan’s fault if we can only find the evidence to pin it on him. And if you let me go now, I won’t even involve you in the whole thing. You can get away with kidnapping me. I won’t file charges.”

“I don’t think you understand the gravity of the situation here. Captain Potts hid you—an unidentified person from South Titan. That’s a crime.”

Tony leaned back. “Well, yes. It is. But in her defense, she did want to have me sent to the State Department like your stupid protocol said she should do. But her teammate talked her out of it saying that they couldn’t trust the people at State.”

“So, is that all there is to your relationship? A Captain and a person she rescued?”

“Our relationship?” Tony took a breath. Did Ronan tell the whole military about their engagement? “Oh, that. You heard, huh? To be honest, I… It started out as a fake relationship. One minute I was being arrested by Ronan and the next I was engaged. She didn’t even buy me an engagement ring, but pretending to be engaged meant that I could continue living with her. So, I guess I can let that slide. Anyway, it was all purely for my protection and yes, we did pretend that we liked each other but now… I…” Tony steeled himself. He wasn’t going to lie about this. Not when he’s going to die soon. “I actually like her. A lot. It just happened and I’m not going to apologize for it. If it’s any consolation, Captain Potts is a professional. She doesn’t like me back. This thing between us is purely one-sided which astounds me because that never happens back in South Titan. Usually the girls are all over me but my charms don’t work in the North apparently. I mean, I even kissed her. Gave it my best shot but she just said she didn’t mind it. Can you believe it? Most girls kiss me back!”

The General’s eyes flashed dangerously and the next thing Tony knew he was being dragged back to the attic by Gamora.

“Hey, can I at least go to the little boys’ room?”

Gamora only handed him an empty bottle to pee in before slamming the door in his face.

“Seriously?” said Tony. He threw the bottle at one of the boxes and sat on the ground, pulling his knees up to his chest. This was ridiculous. What were the Ten Rings doing keeping him alive? Who was that General? Was he a corrupt official working for the State Department? Was he with Ronan or against him?

The door swung open again and this time, it was an elderly woman who walked in. She carried a tray of food with her and placed it on a nearby table.

“You should eat,” she told him kindly, sparing him a motherly smile. She reminded Tony of someone but he couldn’t quite put a pin in it.

“I’m not eating that,” Tony retorted.

“It’s not poisoned. I can try it for you if you’d like.”

Tony rose to his feet. “Who are you people? Why are you keeping me alive and feeding me? I’m getting serious Hansel and Gretel vibes here. Are you gonna fatten me up and eat me?”

The woman only lowered her head apologetically at him. When she made a move to leave, Tony held out a hand in a stop gesture. “Wait!” The woman stopped midstep. “Before you go, could I use the bathroom?”

The woman let him use the bathroom and whatever escape Tony was planning was foiled when he saw Gamora shadowing the old lady. Yeah, he could make a run for it but Gamora would probably just shoot him down.

After he peed, the kind woman once more walked him back to the attic. On their way, Tony asked her, “Captain Potts… is she alright?” Tony hadn’t heard from her since she left for the mission and she was supposed to be back in the house by now. If she has, she would know Tony was gone and who knows what her next move is going to be.

“Look, I don’t want her to get into trouble or to go to prison because of me. Kill me, torture me, do whatever you want but just leave her out of it. Her and the Company.”

The woman looked at him curiously. “Do you care about her that much?”

“For three months she neglected her mission, she risked her job and her life for me, an Outlander. I’m just… I don’t want her hurt on my account.”

To Tony’s surprise, the woman grasped his arm, saying, “Come with me.” She steered him away from the attic.

“Where are we going?” Tony glanced back and saw Gamora still following them, but she wasn’t doing anything to stop the lady.

Finally, the woman brought him to a bedroom. There was an easel in one corner of the room, a bookshelf on another. There were also miniature sculptures of people Tony didn’t know and of random objects.

The bed was covered in fresh sheets and the lady explained, “We prepared our daughter’s room… in case… so that she’ll have a place to stay when she arrives.”

“Your daughter?” Tony looked at the books on the shelf. They were all art books. He glanced back at the lady and finally realized why she was so familiar. She looked like Pepper in that way mothers do. Her hair was cropped short and was of a lighter shade of red, almost strawberry-blonde with streaks of grey. Her eyes were piercing green and she had the same smile as Pepper.

He was in Pepper’s bedroom.

“Wait, you’re expecting her?”

“Our daughter will know who took you. She’ll come for you. Soon.” Mrs. Potts smiled at him again. “Sleep here tonight.”

“But the General—”

“I’ll take care of the General.”

When Tony was finally alone in the bedroom, he took the opportunity to process what the hell just happened. The General was Pepper’s dad. The same Dad who sent Drax to track them which meant it was probably Drax who kidnapped him from Pepper’s house.

Now, that Tony knew which side the General was on, what was up with that interrogation? Was it a father trying to protect the only child he has left from ruining her career by hiding an Outlander or a father angry that an Outlander had kissed his daughter?

And the mom. At least she was soft on Tony which meant could most likely count on her to stop her husband from killing him if ever it came to that point. She also mentioned that Pepper would come. She would come for Tony.

A surge of hope blossomed in Tony’s chest. She’d come and make sure he’d get back home safely!

He began looking around now, reinvigorated. Unlike her house in the outskirts of town, her room contained a lot more personal effects. There was a framed photo on a desk of Pepper and what he could only assume was her brother. There was another photo of her and her father dressed in their uniform.

Tony smiled at the pictures. He was glad she had a family who cared about her. Not everyone could boast the same.

This was probably why Pepper’s house back in the village had been bereft of any personal photos. She didn’t want herself reminded of her brother or the family she thought she had failed.

Then, his chest felt a little heavy at the thought that if Pepper did come for him, it would mean she would have to choose between him and her career, him and her family.

He shook his head. He couldn’t let that happen. Tony Stark was many things but he wasn’t completely selfish.

Tony fell asleep that night, determined to talk to the General tomorrow. Maybe her dad can get Tony out and Pepper needn’t put her job at risk.

…

Tony joined the Potts’ for breakfast the next day. Mrs. Potts insisted that he was welcome at the table whereas the scowl on the General’s face told Tony the opposite.

They initially ate in awkward silence until Tony cleared his throat and addressed the General, “Sir, I have a proposition for you.”

The General fixed him a serious look that Tony took to mean he should continue.

“I… Your daughter had a plan to bring me back to my country. We tried to smuggle myself into a foreign vessel but we got caught by the coast guard. I’m not gonna go into the details of how we got away with that one, just know that we managed to make it back home safe. Our backup plan is this: I’m to join Company 12 when they return to the demilitarized zone in four days and once there, Captain Potts will personally deliver me to the Southern side of the border.”

The General abandoned his plate and placed his clasped hands on the table. “What’s your proposition?”

“Such a plan can put Captain Potts’ career at risk. Not only is she sneaking in a civilian to the zone but that civilian also happens to be an Outlander. It’ll be the break Ronan’s looking for. If she gets caught, she’ll lose her job. It might even affect your reputation and I don’t want any of those scenarios to happen.” Tony could see the gears shifting in the General’s head. “That plan is the only thing Pepper’s position as Captain allows her to do. But you, on the other hand, you’re a General. The right whisper in the appropriate ear and I know you can have me sent back in a snap.”

“Are you asking me to risk my job to send you back? Why would I want to do that? I can just send you to the State Department right now.”

“No, you won’t,” Tony said bravely. “Because that would mean exposing Captain Potts and if there’s anything a father will do, it’s protect his daughter.”

The General wasn’t pleased that Tony was now blackmailing him. His scowl deepened.

“Please know that I’m not doing this because I want to. I’d love for your daughter to be the last person I see when I leave. I want her to see me off, to tell her goodbye, but I can’t risk it. It’s better if you take charge of my escape.”

The General sighed and said, “I’ll think about it.”

Tony breathed a sigh. “That’s all I ask.”

After their breakfast, Tony spent the rest of the day helping Pepper’s mother in the backyard. She had taken to him like he was the son she lost and Tony didn’t mind it. It kept his mind off Pepper, Ronan, and Stane.

It was around 2 in the afternoon when a car arrived. Tony heard Pepper come before he saw her.

“Where is he?” she shouted.

Tony quickly left Pepper’s room and crept quietly towards the living room. He encountered Pepper’s mother on the way and they both remained in the hallway, listening to father and daughter have it out.

“There is no need to shout at me, Ginny.”

“Where is he?” Pepper said again, her voice barely concealing her anger. “I know Drax took him.”

The General didn’t answer and so Pepper asked, “Is he dead? Did you kill him? Tell me!”

“Why don’t you tell me why you’re more worried for this Outlander than you are about your career! What you did, hiding him, letting Ronan discover him, aren’t you worried about your future?”

“I am!” Pepper cried. “That’s why I’m doing this. I can’t live another day thinking that I could’ve done more to protect him! Don’t you see, dad? Losing Morgan was more than I could bear! I can’t lose Tony too!”

Her father scoffed. “Morgan’s your brother! This man is… you barely know him! Look at you. Treating him like he’s your actual fiancé. He told me everything, you know. You can stop pretending like you care for the Outlander.”

“I’m not pretending! I do care about him! Just because he’s an Outlander doesn’t mean I can’t like him. I’m allowed to show him compassion and mercy.”

“What you did wasn’t mercy!” the General shot back. “The merciful thing to do would have been to report him to the State Department as protocol dictated. Instead, you gave him hope that you could send him back and yet you failed! In fact, if you wanted to show compassion, you would have told me everything. I could have helped you! Instead, you pretended you were engaged to the man and said it to Ronan of all people. You can imagine my confusion when my superiors asked all about my daughter who was apparently going to marry an Avenger! I had no idea what they were talking about! I was humiliated!”

“I’m sorry. I didn’t think you would ever find out.”

“Well, I did! What’s worse is that Ronan knows Stark’s identity now. He’s secured his records and has photos of the two of you. He’s threatening to bring them up the chain of command. This could ruin us both! We could end up in prison!”

Tony stiffened. The General never said anything about that! No wonder he had Tony kidnapped. Get the evidence AKA Tony to a secure location and Ronan won’t have anything to show for his accusations.

“But that’s not even what I’m worried about. I’m worried about you, Ginny. Why? What were you thinking taking him in?”

“I told you! I don’t want what happened to Morgan to happen to him. I couldn’t trust the State Department! Who knows what they’d do to him in there! Do you remember what it was like when Morgan died?”

“You think I could forget what your brother’s death did to this family?”

“I told you Ronan and the Ten Rings were behind it.”

“And I believed you. Yet, the evidence was too circumstantial.”

“Yes, well, now I have evidence he uses the Ten Rings as his personal army and that he’s been secretly purchasing weapons from Obadiah Stane, the same man who works for Tony’s company and had him kidnapped.”

“Go on.”

Pepper told him everything, about where she and Natasha have been the previous week.

The Ten Rings had various hideouts all over the country. Pepper and her team had been narrowing them all down whenever their company was switched out of the zone. They’ve been trying to find which hideout contained evidence of Ronan’s dealings with the Ten Rings.

The warehouse the Ten Rings hid Tony in was one location. And Natasha had discovered another one. Together, she and Pepper broke into it and found hundreds of files that would put Ronan behind bars forever.

But Ronan caught them.

“He was determined to kill us! We barely escaped with the evidence.”

That was when Tony couldn’t stop himself. He turned the corner, revealing himself to Pepper.

She was stunned to silence, seeing him stand right in front of her and in one piece no less. Tony spotted the cuts on her face and immediately went up to her and inspected her wounds. “What happened to your face?” He checked her for other injuries and found her knuckles and arms scarred with small cuts and bruises.

Pepper pulled her hands away and put her hands on either side of his face. “I’m fine. Are you okay?”

Tony pulled her hands down but didn’t let go. “I’m not the one who barely escaped with her life!”

“You were kidnapped!” Pepper reminded him. “Peter feared the worse and Rhodey still can’t forgive himself for not being awake when it happened.”

Tony shook his head and focused on Pepper again. He resumed frisking her until she got annoyed and pushed his hands away.

“I told you I’m fine! You should see Widow.”

Tony felt his stomach drop. “She’s not dead, is she?”

“No. It just hurts when she laughs.” She took Tony’s hand and grasped it tight. “I’m sorry I’m late.”

“Don’t say that. I’m sorry! I I’m the hot mess here, okay? Not you. And it isn’t even Rhodey or Peter’s fault.”

“You’re right about that. It’s his fault,” Pepper said icily, glaring at her father who was regarding them with an incredulous look, his mouth agape at the tender display they were showing.

“Hey, he means well!” Tony said to her. “Give him a chance. You know how many people don’t have parents as caring as yours?”

Pepper was rendered speechless, not expecting Tony to come to her father’s defense and honestly, neither did Tony.

The General, meanwhile, was looking at them interact like he couldn’t quite believe what he was seeing. “The two of you are giving me a headache.” He massaged his temple all the while saying, “Go. Go away.”

Pepper was more than happy to oblige and leave her parents in the living room. With her hand on Tony’s, she led him back up to her bedroom.

Finally, alone together, Pepper wrapped her arms around Tony, hugging him tightly.

“How did you find me? How did you know it was Drax who took me?”

Pepper pulled away and explained, “Peter said he encountered a man who identified himself as Drax.”

“He introduced himself?” Tony’s face scrunched up in confusion. That tracker was really something else. He moved to sit on the edge of the bed. Pepper joined him.

“I told you. Drax is a great tracker but he isn’t big on keeping a low profile. That’s how I knew my dad had you.  God, Tony, I thought the worst, that Ronan had gotten to you before we could return. I shouldn’t have left you alone.” She bowed her head, avoiding his eyes in guilt.

Tony couldn’t take it. None of this was her doing. “If you hadn’t left, you never would have found documents incriminating him.”

“Natasha was right,” Pepper said quietly.

“What?”

Pepper looked up and faced him. “I… she accused me of forgetting my mission. That I was so taken up with playing your fiancé that I had forgotten all about Ronan.”

“That’s why you left,” said Tony, recalling the conversation between Pepper and Natasha that he overheard.

“Yeah.” Pepper took a deep breath and said, “And you know what I realized?”

“What?”

“I wasn’t pretending.” Tony almost didn’t hear that right. He held his breath and Pepper continued, “When I was with you, I… I was never pretending. I realized how much I honestly enjoyed being with you and talking to you even if it meant I had to clean up after you or we were arguing most of the time. I like it when you do something sweet like make Peter a robot or when you cleaned up my house. And that’s why I need you to go,” she urged him, touching his arm. “You need to go back to your country. You need to be safe.”

Tony shook his head, still trying to process what she had just confessed. “Pep, I—”

“And you need to bring Stane down.” From her pocket, she pulled out another folded document and handed it to him.  

Tony opened it and saw Ronan had received an amount of 10 million from an offshore bank account.

“This was the only amount Ronan received at the time of your kidnapping. The rest of the five million the Ten Rings were asking was never sent. Now, I can’t link it to Stane directly, not when our internet’s being regulated. But when you go back, you can use the technology at your disposal to follow up on this without the risk of you getting caught or imprisoned. Promise me you’ll bring this bastard to justice for what he did to you.”

Tony couldn’t believe it. He looked at her, surprised that she did this for him. “Is this why you almost got caught?”

“Well, partly. Natasha wanted to leave after finding out the ties to Stane but I wanted to give you something you could use when you got back, evidence to arrest Stane. It took us too long to look for it and eventually he found us out.”

“You didn’t have to do this for me. You’ve already done so much.”

“What are you talking about? Of course I had to do it. I told you. I care about you. And I couldn’t bear the thought of Stane getting away with everything. Also… I…” Pepper winced and Tony braced himself for bad news. “I lost your knife.”

He wasn’t expecting that. “What?”

“We couldn’t bring heavy artillery without having to answer some questions. So, Nat and I were forced to make do with knives and daggers. I left mine imbedded against a guy’s rib cage.” Pepper was beginning to ramble now and Tony couldn’t help but find it cute. “You don’t have to worry about fingerprints because Widow and I were wearing gloves and we wiped all our weapons clean so in case we left one behind it wouldn’t be linked back to us. But I don’t want you to think that I was being careless with your knife. I mean, I know you tried your best to make it with limited—”

Tony had dropped the document to his lap and cupped the back of her head, interrupting her.

Pepper stopped talking. “What are you doing?”

“You’re really something else, you know that?” Tony said softly and lowered his mouth so that it hovered above hers, making it clear exactly what he was doing. He didn’t kiss her yet, though, giving her time to push him away if she wanted to.

She didn’t. “What do you mean?”

“You infiltrated Ronan’s hideout and risked your life to get evidence for me to use against Stane and you’re worried about a damn knife?”

“Well, I know how hard you worked for it—”

Tony pressed his lips to hers.

It was different kissing her when they weren’t putting up any pretenses. For one thing Pepper was free to do with her hands what she will—and God, did her hands raking through his hair feel great—and for another, Tony was done holding back.

His tongue slipped in her mouth and Pepper adjusted herself, moving so that her back was flat against the bed, her body lying fully under Tony’s. He supported himself by bracing his hands on either of her side so that he wouldn’t crush her—not that he could; Pepper was freakishly strong.

Pepper’s hands moved down to his chest, pulling him closer. Then somehow her hands had found their way beneath his shirt and were now running up and down his chest. Tony broke away and began peppering kisses from her cheek down to her collar bone. When he sucked at a particular spot on her clavicle, Pepper’s hands gripped Tony’s back, her fingernails digging through his skin, and she let out a soft moan that got Tony’s blood rushing south.

Worried he might do more than just kiss her in her parents’ house, he stopped and buried his face in the crook of Pepper’s neck, both of them breathing heavily.

She gave a small giggle, fingers raking soothingly through his hair again. “You seem to like interrupting me when I’m talking.”

Tony pushed himself up so that he rose a couple more inches above her and he could see her better. “I’m sorry. I thought you wouldn’t mind it.”

She shook her head, smiling. “I don’t mind. I just mean you have a habit of kissing me right when I’m in the middle of talking.”

“What do you mean? I only ever interrupted you with a kiss once.”

“You’re forgetting the one that just happened.”

“Okay that one too. But two incidents don’t really make a habit. Besides, may I remind you of the times when you interrupted me with your kisses.”

“That has never happened.”

“In the boat!”

“You weren’t talking!”

“I was thinking and you interrupted my train of thought.”

“Thinking doesn’t count! You know what, we’re going nowhere with this.” She pushed him and he rolled off her. Then, she climbed atop him, enjoying the surprised look on his face. “I’m going to kiss you now and I don’t want you to interrupt me.”

“Aye, aye, Captain.”

…

“I’m so sorry!” Rhodey said to Tony as soon as he saw him. He and the rest of the Company had arrived at Pepper’s childhood home at the request of their Captain.

Rhodey’s head was bowed low in shame, looking like a sad Chihuahua instead of an aggressive one. He felt that he had failed Tony and maybe he did, but Tony didn’t really care. He clasped Rhodey on the back. “All’s forgiven, man. Besides, it was my idea that we play that drinking game even though you told me you were on ‘duty.’”

Tony hoped Rhodey realized what the former was doing. He was trying to take some of the blame off of Rhodey’s shoulders, to carry the burden of it because to be fair, none of them were doing their jobs that night and were all equally to blame.

Rhodey smiled, receiving the message. “I forgive you too, Steve.”

Tony shook his head. “Pepper’s parents know all about me. So does Ronan. There’s no point in pretending anymore.” He turned to Natasha who was sitting in the couch. She had taken a flesh wound to her side but was otherwise okay.

“Thank you,” Tony said to her. “You didn’t have to help Pepper get me my evidence but you did. Thank you so much.”

Natasha rolled her eyes good naturedly. “You’ve turned soft in your time here. Are you sure North Titan air isn’t doing you some good?”

Tony laughed dryly at her just as Peter eyed him and Pepper.

“I don’t think it’s North Titan,” said Peter.

Pepper rolled her eyes and took Tony’s hand in front of them. “If you have something you want to say, you better say it now.”

Natasha, Rhodey, and Peter looked at each other. Natasha shook her head and muttered something that sounded like, “It’s your life,” while Rhodey shrugged and said, “I knew there was something going on in that bedroom but did I say anything? Nope.” Peter, on the other hand, was grinning widely and simply said, “Grace and Daddy Warbucks.”

Tony groaned out a “NO!” just as General Potts and his wife came in the living room and joined them. The mood in the room automatically grew serious as Natasha, Rhodey, and Peter stood in attention and saluted.

General Potts waved away the formality. He and his wife took their seats. “We need to talk about what we’re going to do with Ronan and Stark. Stark has asked me to find a way to send him back.”

Pepper looked at Tony, confused. “What? But we had a plan.”

Tony gave her a sympathetic look. “I know. But Ronan knows who I am and knows you’ll be hiding me. He’ll be watching your every move. He most likely knows it was you and Widow who broke in and stole his documents too.”

“He’s right,” chimed the General. “Which is why I sent Gamora to watch over your house.”

“Drax is also tracking Ronan,” added Mrs. Potts.

“You do know he can’t stay invisible, right?” Tony said. “I mean, even I was able to spot the guy.”

“His orders aren’t to remain undetected. He’s going to find Ronan and deliver him a message.”

Tony’s eyebrows shot up. “Ooh. Do tell.”

The General addressed Tony. “I thought about your proposition and I appreciate you trying to protect my daughter. But I’m afraid I’m going to have to reject it. The safest way we can get you back is through the demilitarized zone.”

Tony immediately protested. “But Ronan will—”

The General raised a hand, cutting him off. “He will come to me like Drax will tell him to. I’ll make it seem as if I am willing to make a deal with him to arrest you. While I distract him, you four will already be on your way to the South’s border. You will make the switch tomorrow morning. I’ve already called it in. They think I’m punishing my daughter and want her out of my sight. It’s not an unusual request among military families.”

Tony looked at Pepper who nodded encouragingly at him. “Well, it seems like you’ve got it all in order. Who’s ready to bring me home?”

…

…

…

Tony couldn’t believe it. Looking around at the expanse of trees that filled the demilitarized zone, he breathed a sigh of relief. He was finally coming home.

He had said his goodbyes to Natasha, Rhodey, and Peter a few miles back.

Peter trying to fight back tears, had hugged him tightly. “I’ll miss you!”

“Me too, kid. Don’t stop your illegal streaming, alright? And keep working on those circuits like I taught you.”

“Yes, sir.”

Rhodey had clasped Tony on the shoulder. “You know, if you and I had a little more time, I think we would’ve been best of friends.”

Tony snorted teasingly. “You wish.”

When it was Natasha’s turn, she said, “You better not show your face back here again or else I’ll really kill you and make it look like an accident.”

Rhodey nodded. “She’s not kidding. What do you think happened to her husband?”

Well, that solved the mystery of her codename. Tony chuckled. “I like you too, Nat.”

Afterwards, Pepper and Tony walked to the Southern side of the zone, spending most of their time together talking about the most mundane things.

“I never got to make you blueberry pancakes,” Tony was saying. “Of course if you had gotten me the gluten-free flour like I asked, you would’ve had breakfast in bed.”

“You’re impossible to live with, you know that?” she shot back, laughing. “Regular flour can give you the same thing.”

“Yes, but gluten-free flour is healthier.” They continued walking until they reached a part of the forest that was cordoned off by a red rope.

“This is it,” Pepper said.

Tony turned to her. “Do you remember what I told you last night?”

“Which one? You said so many things. There was something about your robots. And then another about your plan to offer clean energy to South Titanians.”

“The part where I asked you to imagine a life with me.”

Pepper gave him a wry smile. “I lived with you for three months. I don’t need to imagine it.”

“What if you came back with me? Hear me out. You can be an artist. You don't have to worry about random inspections, about Ronan. You can live a normal life just like you dreamed about.”

Pepper chuckled at the thought. “And I could live with you and marry you and have a daughter? I heard you talking to Tivan.”

“You eavesdropped on us?”

“It’s not eavesdropping. I was behind a curtain. I didn’t have a choice but to hear it.”

“Okay. I forgive you. Also, in the spirit of forgiveness and full disclosure, I overheard you and Natasha talking about me. Twice.”

She hit him on the arm. “You what?”

“HEY! You should forgive me too! It’s a small house!” Pepper tried to hit him again but Tony caught her fist and pulled her flush against him in a hug. “Anyway, my point is, go back with me. We could name our little girl Morgan. After your brother.”

“I would like that very much,” Pepper replied quietly that Tony almost didn’t catch it. He did catch that silent but after her statement.

“But you won’t come,” Tony said sadly.

“You know why.”

Tony pulled back a fraction and caressed her cheek. “I’m willing to adopt Peter, Rhodey, and Natasha. I draw a line at your dad and mom, though.”

Pepper chuckled. “I don’t think the team wants to leave either. They love it here. They love their jobs, their country. I know it’s not like the South but we made an oath to serve it.”

Tony nodded, understanding, and cocked his head. “At least I tried, right?”

Pepper leaned in and gave him a quick kiss. Tony wouldn’t let her go though and pulled her back against him for another round. She slipped her fingers through his hair in that way he loved while he deepened the kiss, hands on her hips.

He pushed her against the trunk of a tree, his hands finding the curve of her bottom. He hoisted her up and she locked her legs around his waist while her hands were secured around his neck.

It was Pepper’s turn to lavish her attentions on him and she did it in the same way she did her job. She was detailed and focused, not to mention thorough.

"You have to go," Pepper said after a moment. Tony settled her back on the ground. 

"I know. But I don't want to leave you." Tony planted a kiss on her forehead and then her nose and then her cheek. Pepper sighed happily and Tony almost didn't want to leave. He wanted her. Not just in the carnal sense of the word. Yes, he wanted that too, but mostly he wanted to be with her. To make her happy. To share a life with her.

With strength and control Tony didn't have, Pepper managed to pull herself away, eyes blinking back tears. She looked absolutely beautiful with her lips slightly parted, her cheeks glowing.

“Promise me we’ll see each other again.”

Pepper’s brows furrowed in confusion. "What do you mean? You know we can’t.”

"When you've dealt with your business here, when you've finally put Ronan and the Ten Rings behind bars, meet me in Switza." They could both have a normal life in Switza.

"How will I know when and where—"

"You'll know."

Pepper nodded, trusting him. "Okay."

Tony kissed her one last time. Deep and long. Then he turned and crossed the line.

…

The first thing Tony did when he had come out of his debriefing with the South Titanian government was dig deeper on the document he brought back with him.

With Agent Phil Coulson’s help, Tony was able to run a proper investigation on Obadiah Stane and have him arrested and charged. He didn’t even bother with hearing what Stane had to say. Let him rot in prison. Tony didn’t want to give Stane the satisfaction of seeing Tony hurt by his betrayal.

Believe it or not, dealing with Stane’s arrest was easier than returning to his normal life.   Tony mostly kept to his property, not wanting to deal with reporters who would pester him about his disappearance or why he suddenly stopped weapons manufacturing.

It took him a while to get used to living on his own again, at the chirping and beeping from U and Dum-E, or JARVIS waking him up to tell him the weather and the date. He finally had his gluten-free blueberry pancakes but they didn’t taste as good as he remembered they should be.

There were times when he’d look over his shoulder about to say something funny and realize with a pang of disappointment that he was alone. Peter wasn’t there to laugh at his jokes, Rhodey to roll his eyes at him, or Natasha to threaten him.

There was only JARVIS who tried his best to be what Tony needed.

“Would you like to watch something today, Sir? I suggest a TV show that aired while you were away. It’s called Crash Landing On You.”

“Thanks, J, but I’m not in the moon for corny romcoms. Could you put Annie! up?”

“Of course, sir.”

Tony didn’t forget his time in North Titan. He didn’t want to. He also did everything he could to repay the team.

He set up the Spider-Man Foundation for foster children and also began to fund scholarships to study Art in Switza. He held benefits in Switza once a year and Tony always attended. It was a highly publicized event; he spared no expense on the marketing and posters.

“Just tell me if you have a girlfriend there,” said Happy, over the phone.

Tony was currently in Switza and Happy wanted to know why his boss was spending more time than necessary in the foreign country. “A kid?” Happy gasped. “Is this why you’ve been watching Annie! on repeat? You fathered a child and you’re secretly visiting for parenting purposes!”

Tony rolled his eyes even though his assistant couldn’t see it. “There are no little Anthony or Antoinette Starks running around in the world.”

He walked out of the hotel where the benefit’s guests were currently having their lunch.

“Although I have to tell you, I’m not finding the idea of being a father as scary as I used to. I think I might even be a great—” Tony stopped dead in his tracks.

Pepper Potts was standing at the foot of the steps leading up to the hotel. She was smiling shyly at him.

“Pep,” Tony said.

“Pet? You think you’ll make a great pet? You’re not making sense, boss!”

“Happy, I’m gonna call you back.”

“Yeah, you better call me back when you—”

Tony put his phone back in his pocket and approached Pepper. She looked great. The last time he saw her she was in uniform and sporting some cuts and grazes on her face and arms. Now, she was in a loose summer dress and wearing heels that accentuated her long legs.

“You look—wow.”

She laughed and her eyes roved all over Tony’s three-piece suit. “You too,” she said.

“So, you got my message.”

She pointed at huge billboard a distance away. Tony’s face smiled at them. “How could I not? You’d have to be blind not to see your face all over the city.”

Tony laughed nervously. “How’s Ronan?”

“Dead.”

“Good.”

“Ten Rings?”

“Wiped out.”

“And the rest of the team?”

“They sent letters.”

“Nice. I’ve prepared some stuff for them too for you to take back. I always bring everything when I visit here just in case I meet you. I even got a Chihuahua for Rhodey but the yappy thing’s grown on me. So, I’m afraid it’s staying in my house.”

Pepper laughed. Then, she looked around and said, “Do you want to go somewhere?”

Tony blinked and then remembered that they were still standing at the steps. “Right!” He offered his arm to Pepper who shook her head.

“I’ve waited two years to see you and you want to link arms?”

Tony grinned and simply spread his arms out. Pepper stepped into his embrace and Tony wrapped his arms around her.

“Do you want to know what I got for you?” Tony asked her.

“Later,” she said and then whispered against his ear. “I want you to take me slow dancing… Also, I’m wearing the lingerie.”

Tony’s jaw dropped and he stepped back, trying to use his non-existent X-Ray vision to see through her dress. “Which one?”

Pepper winked. “Patience is a virtue, Mr. Stark.”

Tony growled and pulled her against him. “Not right now it isn’t.” Then he kissed her because really, it’s been two years. They’ve waited long enough.

…