Actions

Work Header

We were born and raised on it

Summary:

Jane Smith is about to introduce her girlfriend to her family for the first time. Just one little, or actually very big, problem. She has a very, very, very large family. How will Yaz cope with meeting all twelve of Jane’s brothers at the same time?

Notes:

Was this shamelessly based off a probably shit-post? Yep

Am I ashamed I wrote it all in like, three days? Nope

For those of you wondering, this was inspired by this post by Timetravelbypen on Tumblr (I’m typing the post out because I don’t know how else to show you)

Common Human!AU treatment of 13: Tragic Backstory, no living family/no family who will speak to her/etc

Proposed Human!AU treatment of 13: Youngest daughter in a family with 12 (really weird) older brothers

So I did just that! Yes, I know that canonically, Thirteen should be the oldest. But, writing her as the baby and also as the only girl was just too good to pass up. Also, a fun new dynamic for me to explore, given that I myself am an eldest child, not a youngest.

Work Text:

“Are you sure about this?” Jane asked, looking at Yaz hesitantly. “My family can be a bit much. Maybe it’s better if we do this slowly. I’ll invite my mum over, and you could just meet her first?”

 

Yaz laughed. “Of course I’m sure. You’ve met my family, and now I want to meet yours. All of yours. I don’t mind if they’re hectic.”

 

Jane sighed, but put her key in the lock on the bright blue front door. As she pushed it open, someone came running up, snatching Jane into a bear hug, her feet lifted off the ground.

 

“Janie!” The person said. “Guys! Janie’s home!”

 

“Niceta see you too Matt,” Jane wheezed. “Can ya put me down?”

 

The person did so happily, holding Jane at arms length and grinning wildly. “You’re blonde!”

 

“Have been for years,” Jane said. “Thanks for noticing.”

 

The thud of footsteps echoed through the front hall as three people came running down the steps, all practically shoving each other to hug Jane first.

 

“Boys!” A stern voice said from another room. “Stop harassing your sister and get in here!”

 

Immediately, the hall emptied, leaving a ruffled Jane and an amused Yaz at the mercy of Jane’s mother, who came out of the kitchen with a tea towel over her shoulder and a smile on her face.

 

“You must be Yasmin,” she said, shaking Yaz’s hand. “Oh, the boys are gonna love this one. Come on, let’s get some food into you. Especially you Jane, you look stick thin! Go, I’ll rally the rest of them.”

 

As she headed up the steps to presumably grab the rest of Jane’s family, Yaz peered at a photo on the wall. “Are these all brothers?”

 

“Yep!” A cheerful voice said behind them. “Twelve of them! Mum actually cried when we learned Janie here was going to be a girl.” He held his hand out. “Name’s David! I’m fourth youngest.”

 

“And the biggest pain in my ass,” Jane added. “Always hogged the shower, this one.”

 

“I did not!”

 

“Yes you did!” Five separate voices yelled back, and Yaz laughed.

 

“That’s Matt, you met him already,” Jane said, pointing to the photo. “Peter’s just there, and Chris is next to David off on the left. William, we call him Willie, he’s there, on the far right. Then Patrick and Tom, with Jon between them. The first Peter is there. Dad insisted we call two kids Peter after his father died, so we nicknamed this one Pete. Then it’s Colin, Sylvester, who hates his name by the way, and finally, Paulie’s just there, right on the end.”

 

“Holy cow,” Yaz breathed. “You weren’t kidding.”

 

Jane sighed. “And there’s me. Right in the center. The baby of the family.”

 

“And the only girl your mother is ever going to have,” an older man came down the steps, holding his arms out. “How’s my little girl?”

 

“Brilliant,” Jane said, hugging the man, who Yaz presumed was her father. “Absolutely brilliant.”

 

Jane finally got a chance to shrug off her coat, sticking her tongue out when one of the boys made a face at her outfit underneath. “I’d like to see you wear these suspenders!” She yelled at his retreating back.

 

“Oh, Janie’s prepping for the flood,” David said mockingly. “Nice pants.”

 

“Mhm,” Jane grabbed a glass from a kitchen cabinet and began to fill it with water. “How are your girlfriends? Which one are you with right now?”

 

David’s ears turned red and he grumbled something under his breath as Jane laughed. “Kidding Davey,” She said in a sing-song voice as she directed Yaz to the couch. “Where’s the rest of the pack?”

 

Immediately, someone came running in, body slamming Jane into the couch. Yaz almost stepped in to break them apart, until she realized Jane was laughing, play fighting whoever had just tackled her.

 

“Tom!” She yelled happily, gasping for air between bouts of laughter. “Tom get off!”

 

The head of curls finally relented, sitting upright and helping Jane do the same. “Sorry,” he said. “Couldn’t resist.”

 

Jane wiped her eyes and smoothed her hair down. “Yaz,” she said, peering past her brother. “This is Tom, fourth oldest.”

 

“Pleasure!” Tom said happily, shaking Yaz’s hand. “Is this the Yasmin we’ve all been hearing about?”

 

“It better be!” Another person came into the room, eyeing Jane. “‘Else Mum’s gonna have a fit,” He turned to Yaz. “Call me Pete.”

 

Yaz was starting to get a bit overwhelmed with all the names, and Jane could tell. She put an arm protectively around Yaz’s waist and pulled her close. “I think we’re gonna head upstairs for a bit. Call us when dinner’s ready, yeah?”

 

Both boys groaned, but allowed them to trail up two flights of stairs until they were in a small closet space. It was empty apart from a spiral staircase decorated in fairy lights and a small wicker basket in the corner.

 

“Up we go,” Jane said, gesturing up the steps. “Mum and Dad had hell figuring out where I’d go when Peter and I were old enough for our own rooms. Thankfully, I found this,” she popped a thin door open. “And it was decided.”

 

The attic smelled like dust and sugar, and while Jane shuffled through the space to try and find the light switch, Yaz focused on what she could see.

 

A skylight, just above a bed decorated with messed up blue sheets, filtered dusty light into the room, illuminating most of it. The rug covered wooden floors, the two bookshelves brimming with books in the corner closest to the door. Jane’s desk was shoved in an alcove with a circular window that overlooked a garden, the scuffed surface littered with papers and books and the occasional figurine.

 

Finally, she found a light switch, flicking it and letting the rest of her space come to life.

 

The lights were all dangling in clusters, like stars, above the furthest corner. It had a decently sized papasan chair and a small table with books stacked high on its surface. The space was sectioned off by sheer star patterned curtains, and Jane carefully pulled them back to let the light flow.

 

“So?” She said, coming up behind Yaz. “What do you think?”

 

“I love it,” Yaz breathed. “It’s so,” she turned in a circle, letting the aura of the space wash over her. “You.”

 

Jane smiled. “I’m glad you like it,” she murmured. “C’mon, let’s sit.”

 

They curled up on the bed together, Jane tugging a box out from under the bed frame. She rummaged through the contents until she found exactly what she needed.

 

“Aha!” She threw the black photo album down. “There it is!”

 

Yaz cuddled up next to her as she got on the bed, opening the album and staring at the photos.

 

“Figured if meeting them all at once was a bit stressful, we could start here,” Jane murmured. “Mum gives us each an album every year for New Year’s, but mine from last year stayed here.”

 

She pointed to the first photo. “That’s from when we took that trip out to Germany, remember? There’s me with Pete and Jon, outside Berlin. And then this,” she trailed her finger to the next picture. “Is Paul and Sylvester. Oh, and I guess Colin made it into the photo as well,” she laughed. “You can always tell which one he is from the stupidly colored clothes.”

 

She flipped the page, continuing to go on. “There’s Tom’s wedding. Remember, I wanted you to go to that, but you had a work thing?”

 

Yaz nodded, pointing to a photo of all the kids sitting at a long table. “Why’re you the only one with a plastic wine glass?”

 

“Oh,” Jane laughed. “It’s a running joke. I’ve broke more than a few glasses in my time, and now I only get plastics. But it’s better than the sippy cups I got when I was a teenager. Dave and Chris bought them as a joke, and in retaliation, I used them for months.”

 

“Do I want to know why?”

 

Jane shrugged, flipping through the album. “Y’know how I’m accident prone?”

 

Yaz ran a finger over Jane’s knuckles, one of which was busted from a disagreement with their laundry basket. Right next to it, on her ring finger, was a bandaid from her recent knife accident. “Yeah.”

 

“Well, compared to how I was as a kid, this is nothin’,” she sighed. “I was the definition of clumsy. Mum practically banned me from drinking in any room with carpet. In fact,” she gestured to the rug closest to them, where there was, in fact, a stain in the corner. “Cranberry juice.”

 

She got up, digging out a few more albums and passing them to Yaz. “Here. That’s from when I was a toddler. Take a look.”

 

As with the first album, the photo pasted to the beginning page was a full family photo. Jane was in the middle, as usual, surrounded by younger versions of her brothers.

 

“There we go,” Jane snuggled back down with Yaz, balancing the photo album on her legs. “Me as a toddler! God I looked annoying.”

 

The photos were all childish, halloween costumes and first days of school. Although, there was a funny one of Jane pouting on the kitchen counter, her face red with determination.

 

“Mum was trying to cut my hair!” Jane defended when Yaz began laughing. “Very overwhelming for a kid!”

 

They brushed past Jane’s other milestones. All of her brother’s graduations, her first day of middle school, a reluctant photo of her with braces, her prom photos, her graduation, and finally, her last day in the house.

 

“Girls!” A voice floated up the steps, calling Yaz and Jane. “Dinner!”

 

Jane grimaced. “Ready to face the family?”

 

Yaz nodded. “Absolutely.”

 

Dinner was hectic, but in a decidedly good way. Everyone talked to everyone else, and Jane and Yaz, who were seated on one end, chatted happily to Peter, David, Matt, and Chris.

 

“Oh please!” Jane said, waving her fork at David. “My job is way harder!”

 

“Astrophysicist.”

 

“A&E Doctor!” Jane defended loudly. “When was the last time you saved a life?”

 

David smiled, looking down at his plate. “Fork, Jane.”

 

Jane looked at her hand, which no longer held her fork. Instead, the offending utensil had hit the floor with a loud clatter, silencing the room. “Oops.”

 

“You didn’t tell us you had gotten your M.D. Jane,” her mother said from the other end of the table.

 

“Was gonna mention it at Tom’s wedding,” she mumbled, suddenly embarrassed. “But I didn’t wanna ruin the day.”

 

“This calls for cake!” Tom said suddenly, standing up. “I’ll go grab it, shall I?”

 

He left, leaving behind a thinning tension, and immediately, the questions began to roll in.

 

“When did you graduate?”

 

“Why didn’t you tell us?”

 

“Where are you working?”

 

“What job are you doing now?”

 

Jane smiled, putting her hands up. “Guys!” She said. “Calm down! I didn’t say anything last time because it wasn’t right! I told Tom because he asked, but that’s it. We had a small graduation party at my flat and didn’t go any further because I went to work right away at the local A&E. I do trauma stuff there, and I have for months.”

 

Tom came back in before anyone could say anything else, a covered plate in his hands. “In celebration of Jane finally getting that damn degree,” he said happily. “I made a cake!”

 

He set the cake in front of Jane, and she teared up. “Tom!”

 

“What?”

 

She looked up at him, happy tears trailing down her face. “I love it.”

 

The cake was a dark blue, the same color as Jane’s scrubs at work. It had a fondant stethoscope on top, with the words ‘Congratulations Jane’ written in looping gold cursive.

 

“Stayed up ages working on it,” Tom said proudly. “But only the best for my baby sister.”

 

They cut the cake, distributing it evenly amongst the family. Jane gave Yaz a slice, and Yaz immediately took a bite.

 

“Oh it’s really good!” She said, taking another bite. “Jane, you have got to try this.”

 

“I’m getting there,” Jane passed another plate down the line.

 

Yaz stood, poking Jane’s cheek. “Open.”

 

Jane reflexively opened her mouth, allowing Yaz to give her a bite of her cake.

 

“Holy cow Tom,” she said around her mouthful. “This really is good!”

 

Tom bowed. “Why thank you.”

 

The rest of the night was quiet. After cake was a movie, during which mostly everyone fell asleep. Eventually, when Yaz kept yawning and could barely keep her eyes open, Jane scooped her up and carried her easily up the steps, calling a gentle goodnight to the rest of her family.

 

“Have fun today?” Jane asked as she set Yaz down on her bed.

 

Yaz nodded, kicking out of her jeans and wriggling so she could take her bra off without getting up. “Loads.”

 

Jane lay next to Yaz, wearing a pair of battered shorts and no shirt. “I’m glad.”

 

They lay together, a tangle of warm limbs and fluffy blankets. Jane was flat on her back, one arm protectively around Yaz, staring up at the skylight.

 

“You can really see ‘em out here, can’t you.”

 

She blinked, not expecting Yaz to still be awake. “Hm?”

 

“The stars,” Yaz mumbled, gazing upwards as well. “You can see them so well from here.”

 

Jane smiled. “I suppose you can.” She breathed. “I used to count them, when I couldn’t sleep as a kid. Always lost count before I reached a hundred though.”

 

Yaz yawned, rolling over and burying herself into Jane’s side. “See how many you can get tonight.”

 

“Alright love,” Jane murmured. “I’ll count, just for you.”

 

She made it to seventy three before she fell asleep.

Series this work belongs to: