Chapter Text
He roused slowly and silently, not moving while his mind returned to his body. He was relaxed; more so than he'd felt in a long time. His eyes stayed shut as he tried to place himself. It took a moment to remember where he was, but a warmth spread through him as his consciousness caught up. He slowly opened his eyes to see her sat at the other end of the sofa, reading her book. She hadn't noticed him wake.
He watched her in silent adoration; her eyes gliding smoothly over the words on the page, the way she softly bit her lip as she read, running the page between her fingers before she turned it and smoothed it down.
He couldn't stop the smile from growing on his lips.
"Hey beautiful." He croaked in a sleepy voice, gently drawing her attention away from her book.
A wide smile landed on her face.
"Hey sleepy head." She said gently, closing her book and setting it down. Her hands ran along his legs to his knees and back down again. He hadn't noticed until that point that she must have put them on her lap as he'd slept.
"Is that pizza not here yet? He asked, suddenly aware of how ravenous he was.
"Oh it arrived about fifty pages ago." She laughed softly at him.
"What?! What time is it? Why didn't you wake me?" He rattled off questions as he sat himself up and rubbed his face aggressively.
"It's eight-thirty." She chuckled at him. "You didn't wake up when the bell went, or when I moved you off me to get up." She shuffled up to him and kissed him gently.
"Shit, sorry."
"It's ok." She shrugged, looking him over. "You obviously needed it."
"It'll have gone cold now." He sulked.
"The oven's warmed." She kissed him quickly before standing up, pulling him with her as she went.
"Ok wait…" he said, still sleepy as he stood. "Come here…"
He pulled her back, bringing her close to him and pressing his forehead against hers as he wrapped his arms drowsily around her neck, still drunk from sleep. She curled her arms around his back. Their eyes locked, enjoying the closeness they were now free to savour.
He pressed his lips against hers, still heavy and dopey. She responded, gently parting her lips as he sank further into the kiss. He slid his hands down her back and clasped them together around her waist, reluctantly opening his eyes and resting his forehead back on hers.
"Why did this take me so long?" He asked, more to himself, not expecting her to answer.
"Because you've starved your brain of sleep and food…" she said matter of factly and narrowed her eyes at him, leading him to the kitchen by the hand.
He leant back onto the kitchen counter as he watched her place the pizza box straight into the oven. She closed the door, then reached for a bottle of wine, dragging it across the counter top.
"Drink?" She asked.
"No." He said defiantly and pushed the bottle away. He reached for her waist, kissing deeply and impatiently into the crook of her neck.
"Ok!" she smiled at his frantic change of pace, extending her neck to one side, inviting him in.
"How long have we got?" He mumbled into her shoulder as he began unbuckling his belt.
"Five minutes..." She breathed heavily, closing her eyes as he kissed across her collarbone. "...maybe less."
"Definitely less..." He breathed with a laugh, kissing back up to her lips as the buckle of his belt fell to one side.
She undid the button on his jeans as his hand slid between her leggings and her knickers, feeling her warmth through the fabric.
"Take them off." He breathed into her ear as he teased at her earlobe with his teeth.
"Please…" she taunted him while pushing his jeans and boxers down his thighs.
"Fuck please." He smiled into a kiss as he slipped his thumbs down either side of her knickers and pushed them down. He backed her against the counter and ran his hand down her, sliding two fingers smoothly into her.
"Fuck…" he said without intention, feeling her react to his touch.
He braced himself with one hand on the countertop, and lifted her leg with the other to get as close as he could to her.
A heavy mix of blasphemous names tumbled from both of their mouths as he slid into her. Her heat surrounded him tightly, and it took everything in him to pace himself.
She wrapped an arm around his neck, pulling his mouth to hers as he rocked back and forth against her. Her back pounded against the counter top behind her, her hips moving in time with his.
He felt the rising sensation of climax far too soon for his liking, and threw his head back with a frustrated grimace. The groan that came with it was unintentional, and she noticed his broken rhythm.
"Wait…" she placed a hand at the back of his neck and drew him in, forehead on his.
"Trying…" he breathed heavily, the feeling of him inside her almost too much to bear.
"I just mean…" she kissed him kindly, not judging his stamina, "...let me catch up." She looked right at him as she shifted her weight and slid her hand down between them and touched herself.
"Fuuuuck…" He cried out, with a pained laugh. "That is not helping!"
He closed his eyes, shutting out the image of her pleasuring herself. Watching that would send him over the edge far too quickly. He thrust his hips against her, over and over, his heart pounding.
Her gentle moans escalating in his ear gave him all the signals he needed to know how close she was.
She felt his rhythm become erratic as she worked gently at herself; it didn't need much to get her equal to his state of climax. The sensations built quickly, and on feeling the crest of the wave approach, she moved her fingers so they lightly brushed against him as he moved in her.
"Jesus fuck…" he moaned into the room, the feeling of her fingers against him pushing his climax over the edge. His thrusts slowed but intensified, pushing against her. Her orgasm crashed over her, and she pulled his hips closer into her. She wanted to feel every inch of him. Her moans were muffled into his neck as she held his hips in place, both hands holding him tightly against her.
"Fuck, don't move." She breathed heavily, feeling him pulsate inside her.
"Oh God…" he panted into her hair, the last ripples of her orgasm massaging him.
"He can't help you now…" she laughed, echoing their exchange from their meeting at the vestry.
"Fuck you." He laughed and shook his head, still panting.
He closed his eyes and inhaled deeply, trying to steady his breath. His exhale was slow and controlled as he opened his eyes to see her smiling warmly back at him. They shared a moment of silence, and then fell into gentle laughter as the reality of the last few hours hit them.
"I wouldn't change this for the world." He said with genuine sincerity, tucking her curls behind her ears and kissing her softly.
"Ok, but could you? I think the pizza's burning."
"Oh shit!"
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"So…" she bit into a slice of pizza, her back against the arm of the sofa, legs crossed. "...no plan?"
"Not the slightest bit of a plan." He replied, reaching into the pizza box on the sofa between them. He smiled into her eyes as they faced each other, comfortable with their homely set-up.
"Ok, good to know!" She widened her eyes at him. His infectious laugh sent a shiver down her spine.
"Not helpful, I know…"
"But…" she hesitated. It was the obvious question, but she was reluctant to ask it in case his reaction wasn't as she hoped.
"I'll have to leave the church." He answered, saving her momentary doubt from taking hold. "The catholic church at least." He added quickly, biting into his pizza.
"So I can still call you Father?"
"You can call me whatever you like, babe." He winked, still chewing his food.
"Babe?!" She scoffed.
"Yeah…" he shook his head at himself. "...sorry. We can work on pet names." He smirked at her, enjoying their effortless chemistry.
"Do you have any nicknames?" She asked, interested in the parts of his life she didn't know about yet.
"Not really. You?"
She paused, and picked a mushroom off her pizza slice. A smile hovered lightly on her lips as she thought. She placed down her pizza and tossed the mushroom into her mouth.
"Wait there."
He watched her disappear into her room, wondering what she was looking for.
"Here…" she returned, thrusting a framed picture into his hands as she sat back down.
He looked at her with interest as he took it, lingering his gaze on her before dropping his eyes to the picture.
"Fleabag and Boo." He read the words etched roughly into the wooden frame. The picture inside warmed his heart. Whoever the blonde girl was, their friendship was evidently strong.
He looked back to her and was met with a nervous but sincere smile.
"Are you Fleabag or Boo?" He asked, his voice higher pitched than usual.
"Guess." She laid the challenge before him.
She expected him to refuse, or to flippantly choose one just to get to the answer quicker, but he studied the picture carefully. She watched his eyes dart back and forth between the two friends, lingering every so often on one or the other. After a solid minute of thought, he responded.
"Fleabag." He said gently with a smile, knowing he was right before he even looked back to her.
Her face gave away how genuinely impressed she was that he'd somehow reasoned his way to the correct answer. She was about to ask him how he'd worked it out but he continued.
"So this is Boo?" He pointed to the blonde figure who exuded warmth and love.
"Yep."
"Can I meet her?"
"No." She said with a certainty he hadn't expected.
"Too soon?" He asked, kicking himself for assuming the introduction.
"Too late." She smiled softly at his confusion. "She died two years ago."
"What?" He felt a shock of grief for the girl in the picture he had already warmed to. He touched the picture over Boo's face, unable to imagine what could possibly have happened.
She reached over and took the frame from him. She smiled back at the Boo in the picture.
"She would have fucking loved you." She assured, imagining all the conversations they would have had had she still been alive.
"What happened?" He asked, genuinely distraught.
"Sit back. Eat your pizza." She pushed the box towards him with her toe. "It's quite the story."
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She told him everything; the café, the boyfriend, the mistake, the accident. All of it, without filter. If he could accept the parts of herself that she was ashamed of, they might have a fighting chance. He listened intently, asking questions only occasionally. He was fixated by her, by her past, filled with a pain that all of a sudden answered so many questions he'd had about her.
"So you know where the door is if you don't want anything to do with me anymore!" She joked, but he saw the insecurity in her eyes.
"Don't do that." He said with a kind firmness.
"Do what?" She asked tentatively.
"Well for starters, don't assume I'm going to run off at the first sign of trouble." He frowned at her, hurt she would think his decision to be with her was based solely on the surface emotions of passion and lust.
"I told you," his tone hardened without intention. "I'm in this to make it work and you need to know that is always going to be my priority when things get hard." He softened the deep frown that had unknowingly formed on his face when he saw her face lose its spark.
"But more importantly," he moved the pizza box to the floor and shuffled next to her, taking her hands in his, "don't ever think that mistakes you may have made in your past make you any less worthy of love now."
Her gaze buried into their entwined hands, but he reached up and gently tilted her chin so their eyes met. He looked deeply into her eyes, holding her gaze so she understood his words.
"I have a lot of love to give to you." He held her chin softly as he kissed her. "And this isn't going to work if you're second guessing whether you deserve it or not."
His eyes darted between hers, thumb still gently caressing her chin.
"You do."
She held his gaze until she felt tears prickle her eyes. The feelings inside her were overwhelming. His understanding, his acceptance, his love. All of it, pouring into her through his eyes. She managed a nod and closed her eyes momentarily to stop the tears forming. His eyes were still fixed on her when she opened them. He was relentless in making her face the truth.
"We're in this. Warts and all." He searched her eyes for her agreement.
"I don't have warts." She frowned playfully, breaking her eyes away from his.
"Your humour doesn't disarm me." He said defiantly, chasing her gaze.
"It does a little bit." She smirked.
"Ok, a bit." He laughed, kissing her and allowing her weight to push him back into the sofa so she laid on top of him.
She sank into him, feeling his lips touch against hers. As his breath deepened in time with his ever-wanting kisses, she backed away slightly, curling a smile at his sudden confusion.
"Disarmed." She whispered with pride.
He dismissed her words with a momentary frown, then placed a hand at the small of her back and pulled her close against him.
"I've got you right where I want you."
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She tidied away the pizza box, taking it into the kitchen as he followed with their empty wine glasses. She laughed to herself as she thought about how much had changed in just a few hours.
"Today has been weird." She turned to him and rested her arms on his shoulders.
"Tell me about it, I did a funeral this afternoon."
"What?" She backed away, trying to read him. "Really?"
"Yeah…" he shrugged, holding her waist in his arms. "You actually helped me with it, believe it or not."
"Ok…" her eyes asked all the questions she had.
"Your last letter." He said, unsure why the sadness he felt over it lingered still. "It just…" he shrugged. "I couldn't find the words to say, but they were right there. You gave them to me."
She watched him as his mind took him back to that place, not twelve hours before. The heartbreak and pain, though healed now through their reunion, had left their mark. That morning he'd been a priest. Now, he didn't know.
"Is this going to be too hard for you?" She asked, concerned for his wellbeing more than the precarious beginnings of whatever their relationship was.
"It'll be hard." he said honestly. "It will be. But I don't want to go back to that life if it means I can't have you in it."
She smiled gently at his confidence in his decision.
"So," he continued, leading her back to the living room. "I'll either become an Anglican priest…" he winced a little at the unfamiliar thought. "...or I'll use this as an opportunity to find out if I want to do something else with my life." His mind wandered back to the words Mary had said about her father; changing careers at a late age and never regretting it.
"Oh yeah, like what?" She asked with interest.
"Oh I don't know…" he shrugged with a thoughtful expression. "...a school counsellor maybe!" He laughed to himself. Her confusion was evident, but he would explain it to her another day.
"But for now…" he spun around to face her. "...I just want to be with you." He kissed her lips softly.
"Done." She smiled gently.
"And get to know you…" his lips traced the curve of her cheek, his teeth nipping gently at her ear.
"Mm-hmm." She breathed heavily.
"And we'll fuck like rabbits…" he ran a hand up the back of her top and smoothly unhooked her bra.
"Oh fuck I forgot!" She pushed him away and ran towards her bedroom.
"What the fuck!" He protested loudly, arms wide and gesturing to his growing erection.
"I've got a present for you! It'll be worth it I promise!" Her words came back muffled from her bedroom.
"Unless it's you completely naked, I'm not interested!" He shouted back, making steps towards her room as she returned, fully clothed, but grinning widely.
"I don't think this relationship is going to work." He sulked when he saw her.
"Here you go." She passed him an envelope, ignoring his fake bad mood.
He recognised it immediately.
"No…" he grinned, laughing as he pulled out three Polaroid photos.
"Interested now?" She watched him as his eyes skimmed across the photos.
An involuntary noise escaped his lips as he took in the sight of her photographic strip-tease. He bit his lip and looked back to her. She stood in front of him with the confidence of a woman who knew exactly how to push his buttons.
His confidence matched hers as he responded.
"Ok." He said with a firm nod. "Get your coat, you've pulled." He gestured with his head to her bedroom.
She raised an eyebrow and turned to her room.
"Oh no, I'm serious." He stopped her. "Get the coat. You owe me a striptease."