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I felt Jacobs’s lips on my forehead. It felt so good and then darkness took me in her powers. I felt electricity go through my veins, making my heart beat again.
I needed to be dead. In hell or heaven, it doesn’t matter. I need to be dead. I wanted to open eyes, but my eyelids where so heavy that only possibility was going back to sleep.
I don’t know when I woke up, but I felt somebody holding my hand. It felt really pleasant. I turned my face and then opened my eyes. It was Jacobs’s mom. She smiled at me and I don’t know why I smiled back. It felt like right thing to do.
“Why I am alive?” I asked her. My throat felt like desert. She saw it, and helped me little bit and gave me water. She sat back and looked little bit scared.
“Because I couldn’t let you die and be his first kill. You said you loved him, and he loves you too, but he doesn’t say that. I never saw him take care of person like that. I just couldn’t make him guilty in your death. And we need to save him.”
Her words made my heart beat faster. She really thinks that he loves me. Love is love, no labels needed for it. I can’t go back to Followers, because they think I’m dead.
“I’m sorry that I squeezed your wrist so hard. But how we will get him back? I can’t go back there.”
“It’s okay, honey! You had the labour. Are you ready to do anything for Jacob and me?”
“Yes, but where is your husband?”
“We divorced some weeks ago. I said that so I could get Jacob out of house, and firstly save you.” she said and I saw little pain in her eyes. Somebody else wanted to save me. I never felt like this. I knew what I need to do to save Jacob and start new life with new family.
“I know what to do. Bring in those FBI agents behind doors.”
She looked surprised. I knew that there would be FBI agents behind the door. I was part of cult. I declare I WAS. When you feel death breath in your neck, you over think your life, and want something good and happy in it. I have killed many people before, and know I want normal life.
Maybe even a kid, because that little kiddo Joey made me realise that they are not so bad. I really want to change for Jacob and his mom.
“I see you are up.” I heard Ryan Hardy’s voice from doors. Jacob’s mom helped me sit in the bed so I don’t put much pressure on the wound.
“Yeah, I’m alive. You didn’t stab me in the right place. You need me to find Followers.”
“And what I need to do if you help us?”
“I want to start new life with Jacob and his mom. We want to be ghosts. You will let Jacob go and I promise we won’t kill any one anymore.”
“Why I need to believe you?”
“Because you are my only chance to start normal life, and I’m your only chance to find them all. I even will go to psychologist.” I said. “Okay! I will make it happen. You really want to start new life?”
“Yes, there is too much blood on my hands. They left me to die. Family never does that. You will need to start it too after everything lies down, because Joey doesn’t like when his friends risk with life.”
“I will think about it.” he said and went out of room. I’m already getting so sappy, but like Jacob’s mom said I would do everything for him. I gently squeezed her hand back and said: “Everything is going to be okay now!”
After three months
My psychologist would come to my hospitals room. I don’t feel this argue to kill people anymore. I feel like normal person. Jacob’s mom Mary visits me every day.
“What are your interests?” my psychologist asked. I needed to think about it, because last couple years it wasn’t something normal people will consider as interest.
“Music! When I was kid I played guitar really well. It made me happy. I think I also can sing.”
“That’s great. I will ask Mary to bring guitar for you. When you feel argue to kill somebody. Just sit and play guitar.” She said smiling, because she also thought I’m getting better. In physical and emotional way.
“You still have some days in hospital and then you will go home. I will visit you there, because you won’t be allowed to out of your house for some weeks. See you next time!”
She walked out of room and I could think everything through, because there so many things that happened. FBI now has their person in Followers. He is really close to Joe so it will take a month or more when Jacob will be back. My hair was getting longer and longer. I even have horse tail.
After some days
I was sitting in my room and strumming guitar. I was getting better and better with each day. It really helped me relax. I hummed some song that was stuck in my head.
“Paul, lunch is ready!” Mary called me. She was really good person to talk with. She didn’t blame me for all things I did, because she knew my back up story.
I put guitar on my bed and went to kitchen. My psychologist Sophie sat there too. Already eating. She was a little part of family too.
“So how the guitar playing is going?”
“Really good if you ask me.” Answered Mary. “Some practice and he will be giving us concerts.”
“I’m not that good.”
“You are. Give yourself a little bit credit.”
“Yeah! I will be the first to come to your concert.” Said Sophie, squeezing my shoulder. Radio was on, but we liked to keep it off, because only thing it aired was update on Followers. This time they were playing the song that was stuck in my head.
I started to hum again, but then I started to sing with my eyes closed. This song reminded me of Jacob so much. When song finished, Sophie and Mary said: “You have amazing voice. Its pity that you will need to live in shadows.”
“It’s my own fault that I chose this life style.”
I finished my dinner and went back to my room. Just staring at ceiling and not thinking about anything.
“Me and Mary will go to shop and buy some product. You will be okay on your own?”
“Yeah! I will practice some more.”
“Don’t overwork!”
“Okay!”
Than I was alone in the house. Everything was so quite then I fell asleep. When I woke up I heard voice I never could forget. Jacob is here and he is screaming. My wound was still not healed, but I needed to get there faster.
“Why I am here?” he screamed.
“Jacob, calm down. Everything will be okay.”
“Who are you?”
It was my time to step in, because he needed to calm down or I will have headaches from this.
“She is my psychologist.” I said. He looked at me and in his eyes there weren’t shock.
“You are not real. I killed you! Paul would never go to psychologist.”
“Sophie, Mary, can you give us a minute alone?”
“Of course, Paul!”
I waited till I heard the doors closed and I said: “You really want to see if I am real?” I didn’t need his answer. I took off my T- shirt. There still was my wound only healed. Now he looked surprised, even little bit sad.
“Your mom saved me and after everything that happened, I wanted normal, peaceful life for you, me and your mom. If you want to leave us, there is a door. FBI agents won’t even touch you, because I made deal with them.” My breath was shaking, because he looked like vulnerable child who needs love. “I changed for you and your mom, but in the end it really helped me. I feel free and normal. I haven’t killed anyone and don’t want to.”
“I still don’t believe you. You can’t change so easy.”
“Then take a step and touch me.”
He stepped one step so his long arm could reach me. His arms were shaking. I took his hand and put on my heart. So he would fell how it’s beating for him. Jacob looked me in the eyes and I saw there tears.
“Jacob, you are not killer. You didn’t kill me. Sophie will help you too. Everything will be okay.” I said while hugging him.
“You really are talking with psychologist?”
“Yeah, it’s helping me get through some childhood memories.”
“You know I wanted to say I love you to you when I did that, but I couldn’t do that, because I was coward.” He said. It made my heart beat even faster.
“Now you will have this opportunity, but right now you need to have a shower and change clothes.”
“That was the thing you said when I woke up in that house.”
“I said I would never leave you.”
He hugged me tighter. I showed him way in my room and leaved him alone. Sophie and Mary were sitting on couch. Sophie gave me my T – Shirt.
“I think I will have another person to talk with.”
“He will be harder to talk with.”
“I know the way in his heart, so it will be easy. I need to leave now, because my husband is calling me. And you have some good family reunion dinners.”
“Paul, did you drink your medicine?”
“No, I forgot. I will go get it.”
I went to my room forgetting that Jacob is there. I opened doors and there he was naked in front of my eyes. Coughed and Jacob turned around.
“I need to get my medicine bottle. Sorry, that I interrupted you.”
“It’s okay! It doesn’t bother me anymore.”
I didn’t say anything. Just took my pills and went out. I wanted him so much but I couldn’t, because he needed time to start to live from a start. I drank my pill and started to help Mary cooking a dinner.
“You are really friendly.” said Jacob. That made me smile.
“Dinner is ready!” Mary said, and put bread on the table. Pills were making me weak and nauseas. I needed to lie down. Today was stressing for me.
“Sorry! I need to lie down. I’m feeling light-headed.”
“You need someone to help you?”
“No, I will get to it! Enjoy your reunion dinner.”
I was on my feet’s on the ground and everything just spun around like crazy.
“Maybe, Jacob, can help you? You look really pale.”
Jacob already was by my side helping me. It felt so good and so familiar.
After some years
I and Jacob lay in bed. Now I was happiest man alive. I had small family that was strange, but still mine. Cult was only faint memories from past. Now we are happy and rich. I signed the contract with Music Company. I didn’t do concerts, but my discs were sold out in first ten minutes.
This new life was best decision in my life I ever made.