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The distance between Hogwarts and Hogsmeade feels shorter than ever as Regulus walks in the direction of the Hog's Head. He hadn't chosen the venue for the meeting, nor the time. Regulus can only count himself lucky that Bellatrix had chosen a Hogsmeade weekend to meet. Sneaking out of school has been getting harder now that the war only continues to escalate outside the stone walls of Hogwarts.
Regulus shivers, taking a moment to wrap his green and silver scarf more tightly around his neck. It's a chilly March day without much to absolve itself. The wind is fierce and the sun is hidden behind clouds. Regulus could've sworn he saw a few snowflakes in the air. It is the perfect day for checking out a stack of books from the library and occupying his favorite armchair in the Slytherin common room. Reading, warmth, and listening in on conversations. Regulus can't think of a better afternoon.
With a sigh, he walks on. Now in Hogsmeade proper, walking down the street that ends in the Hog's Head, he wishes that the weather could have been worse. Dire rain or snow would be an excuse; reluctance is not.
If there has ever been a time when Regulus would consider himself lost in thought, it is now. As such, he doesn't notice the figures in the side street until it is too late. Someone grabs him as he passes. Regulus has his wand out within moments—they should have disarmed him first, the idiots—but he's quickly shoved against the side wall of Dogweed and Deathcap. The spell dies on his lips, stifled at the sight of his brother. A hood is draped over his head, but Regulus would recognize him anywhere.
Regulus's hesitation is enough for Sirius to loosen his grip, not letting go but not holding so tightly. Quickly, Sirius says, "I can explain."
"Explain what? What are you doing?" Regulus hisses, still pointing his wand in Sirius's direction. This close, there's barely enough room to wave it; thankfully, Regulus is becoming adept at wandless magic. Less thankfully, his hesitation at hurting Sirius is lingering. They haven't been brothers in years. It shouldn't be so hard to blast him across the street.
"All good here," says Sirius's accomplice, who'd been keeping watch.
Regulus grits his teeth. He recognizes the voice. "And of course there's James Potter, within a wand's throw of you at all times."
James has the nerve to glance back and say, "Hey, Regulus." He even smiles at him. It's a nice smile, Regulus has always thought so, which is all the more irritating.
"Are aurors supposed to be kidnapping Hogwarts students?" Regulus asks.
"This isn't a kidnapping," Sirius says, rolling his eyes.
"Then let me go."
Sirius doesn't budge. "If I let you go, you'll curse me. Or worse, you'll run. Come on, hear me out, Reggie. All I want to do is talk."
"You're not going to get me to listen like this. Let me go. Now."
His tone of voice seems to be enough for James to leave his post and stand next to Sirius. "Do it, Sirius. It's the only way."
"Yes, listen to your keeper. Heel."
"I don't know why I'm here. Obviously you don't need my help," Sirius tells him. For all that he talks about helping Regulus, he sounds like he's back to the same jerk he was back at Hogwarts. He lets Regulus go with a dark look, but he doesn't leave. Instead, Sirius takes a deep, steadying breath, and says, "Hear me out, alright? Please."
"If you're going to beg..." Regulus says, trailing off, but Sirius doesn't rise to the bait. He only watches him with the gray eyes they both share. For the first time, Regulus wonders if this really is of some importance. "Fine. What is it?"
"Not here." Sirius checks the street, then crosses it.
Regulus doesn't put his wand away, but he stops holding it so visibly. He's relatively certain that he's not being led into an ambush and that this isn't some elaborate prank. James and Sirius grew up somewhat by their seventh year. Besides, Sirius wouldn't return to Hogwarts just to prank a brother who's barely spoken to him in years. Probably. Under the sleeve of his robe, he makes a fist around the handle of his wand. It's been too long since he's had a proper duel.
Regulus looks toward James, who had stayed back with him. "Any hints you want to give me?"
James shakes his head. "All I can say is that it's important. Besides, you might be able to guess anyway."
"Is that a challenge?"
James grins. "Sure. Let's make it one. If you guess what this is about before Sirius tells you, you're free to leave."
"And if I don't?"
"Then you have to hear him out."
"Graduating from Hogwarts has made you boring," Regulus tells him quite seriously. "All this open communication goes against my Slytherin instincts."
He goes anyway, grimacing as he follows Sirius into Madam Puddifoot's tea shop. James opens the door for him. Sirius chooses a table at the far back of the shop, where no one will be able to see them from the door, then opts for one of the shop's intimate privacy screens on top of it. It's all very pink.
"No one will expect us here," James explains at Regulus's unimpressed look. "It's worth the awful pink."
Sirius shakes his head at them. "Are you kidding me? I love this place."
They place their orders before starting their conversation. Regulus decides on a piece of gaudily decorated red velvet cake while Sirius goes for several cupcakes, one of which James decides to take for himself. It is Valentine's Day every day of the year here and it makes every pureblood notion of aesthetics want to shrivel up and die. The cake is excellent.
"Judging by your timing, I assume you're trying to break up my engagement," Regulus says after another bite of cake. To James, he adds, "I'll be leaving now."
It's a bluff. He won't leave until he finishes his cake. It makes the company almost bearable. Maybe James will smile attractively again and make it even more bearable.
Sirius splutters. "You can't be serious. It's Bellatrix. Cousin Bellatrix."
"How do you know I don't want her? That I don't love her, that I haven't been waiting for this moment all my life? What better match for a Black than a fellow Black, a gorgeous older woman who will help me put my house in order and guide me through the ranks of the Dark Lord?" The words leave his mouth easily; they are his mother's, his father's, his own rationalizations. They are the pink icing on the cake that is being pushed down his throat.
"Because you hate her," Sirius replies.
Regulus looks up from his cake, startled. "I don't hate Bellatrix."
"'course you do. You've hated her ever since she said you don't have proper Black features. Something about your chin."
"I was seven." Regulus resists the urge to touch his chin. His chin is perfectly fine. "I never told you I felt that way."
"You didn't have to. I pranked her good for it. Besides, she's in love with Lord Fuckdemort. You don't need to get involved with that mess."
Regulus shrugs. "I don't need her love."
"She doesn't need yours, either. Not when all she'll need is obedience from you. Is that what you want?"
"I should have cursed you when I had the chance," Regulus says, considering whether it would be too rude to disturb the peace of Madam Puddifoot's.
"I'm here to give you options, Reggie."
"What options?" Regulus asks.
Sirius points to James. "I'm glad you asked. Option one, please speak up."
"If you need a spouse, I'm pureblood, single, and best of all, not related to you. Or mad from dark magic." James sounds sincere.
"You don't sound sane right now," Regulus grumbles. "Is there an option two?"
Sirius shrugs. "Escape to another country. Frame Bellatrix for something and get her sent to Azkaban. Become a monk."
"No, thank you." Regulus gave James an appraising look. It's not as though James is a bad catch; his mother wouldn't approve, but she wouldn't murder him for it either. News of his engagement to Bellatrix hasn't been publicly announced, so the scandal of Regulus eloping wouldn't be more than private humiliation, which his mother will be able to shoulder like she shoulders everything to do with Sirius. "How did you two hear about this?"
"I eavesdropped on Bellatrix and Narcissa during my auror rounds," James admits without any shame. "I told Sirius about it right away. She's... not nice, your cousin. She didn't sound happy with the arrangement."
Not nice is a gentle way of describing Bellatrix. But then, James is looking at him like that, all gentle and weird, and Regulus feels the back of his neck heat. "Did Sirius put you up to this?"
"Yeah, but he didn't need to do much convincing," James says. "I want to help."
"See?" Sirius says, pointing from James to Regulus. "It's the perfect plan. Now, I'll leave you two alone for your first date."
"This is not a date," Regulus is quick to say, even as he watches Sirius step out behind the screen. No sounds from outside filter into their little corner of the tea shop; neither would any sounds from inside penetrate past the screen. It strikes Regulus that as much as apparently Sirius trusts his best friend to do the right thing, he also trusts Regulus to not hex James now that his brother is gone. It's a strange kind of trust. A strange kind of world, where his estranged brother appears with wild plans.
James fiddles with his teacup. "It's a little like a date. We even had a chaperon."
Regulus huffs, shaking his head. "Until he left. I've never been on a date. It seemed pointless when I knew that Mum would arrange a match for me the way she couldn't for Sirius. I wouldn't want to get anyone's hopes up."
"Or your own?" James looks sympathetic. He has a touch of frosting on his upper lip that Regulus is momentarily entranced by the thought of licking off.
"Or my own," Regulus agrees. Still, attraction changes nothing.
James licks it off himself with a brief flash of tongue. He leans in, ever the Gryffindor, without a chink in his armor of chivalry. It would be irritating if Regulus weren't so charmed.
"Say yes," James says. It's almost a plea.
Regulus gives the barest shake of his head. "There's more to it than just Bellatrix. It's not just to you that I would say yes to."
"Then take it all. Say yes to me, to my lineage, to my parents who will love you like they love Sirius, to not having to marry her, to getting out from You-Know-Who's grip, to finally denying your mother, to going on a date that is neither chaperoned nor at a tea shop, to happiness."
"To happiness, really?" Regulus will deny ever sounding wistful.
"We'll figure it out. Marry me, Regulus Black," James says, and he looks like wants it, as though this isn't some half-baked scheme of Sirius's that will collapse into itself like a dying star.
There's not a lot one can say no to when James Potter is looking at them like that. Regulus doesn't know how Lily had held out for years; one hour and Regulus has caved like a Hufflepuff.
Regulus slides his plate aside and leans forward. "Kiss me and we'll see. I need to be sure you won't chicken out during the ceremony."
It's a dare, a taunt, a bet against himself, because there is no way that James will do it.
And then it's just a press of lips against his own, warm and sure.
Regulus smiles into the kiss.
Alright, fine. If Sirius wants to marry him off to his best friend, then Regulus might just take him up on the offer. "Yes, James."