Chapter Text
It was strange. The relationship you had with Ivar. Half love and the other half, a full on hate-rage-storm. One minute you were contemplating on knocking him out with a hard object and running away, and the next you were searching for him with your fingertips. And it didn"t help that you could sleep so soundly with his warm body pressed into yours. It was like a constant war going on inside you.
He lied to you, manipulated you, and made you run for years with 2 babies. For years you lived in constant fear and had to scrounge every penny to survive. You never signed up for this twisted roller coaster ride when you allowed him to manipulate his way into your pants. But he proved to be selfish and stubborn. He always only worried about getting what he wanted. Never once, did he ask what you wanted and it only made you hate him.
But the moment you felt his warm fingertips press into your waist every inch of your body sparked in excitement. Your heart began to race when his lips pressed into your neck. For only a split second you chastised yourself for allowing him to touch you and enjoying every damn second of it. Especially when his fingers slowly dipped into your panties and began to gently brush against your mound.
Oh fuck. You could feel a tingling throb grow between your legs and then came the heated moisture. His fingers pressed against your clit and it was like a key to your locked door. Your legs opened slightly just enough to grant him access to all the places you wanted him to touch. The feeling of his lips slowly moving towards your jaw caused you to hum with pleasure.
He continued to rub on your clit with his thumb as he inserted two fingers inside you. Your mouth opened slightly and you turned your head. His lips locked onto yours just a quiet moan errupted from your throat. He pulled his hand out of your panties and you felt him roll you onto your back.
"No, don"t stop." You whimpered.
He let out a quiet chuckle and lifted your shirt up to exspose your chest. "Don"t worry. I"m gonna take care of you." He whispered before he began placing kisses down your chest.
He quickly trailed kisses down your stomach and you felt his fingers curl over the waistline of your panties. You bucked your hips up as he pulled them down your legs. It was antagonizing. You just wanted him inside you righf then and there. But then you watched as he leaned down and began placing kisses up your thighs. Your breathing became heavy as he dragged his tongue from your entrance all the way up to your aching clit.
"Ohh, fuck, Ivar." You moaned.
He reached a hand up to cover your mouth as his tongue swirled and flicked over your clit. Your back arched and you moaned into his palm as he explored every inch of you. He had your thighs trembling and your hips bucking up. Oh, it was fucking exquisite. Then you felt him flatten his tongue against your clit and he started to gently suck.
Your toes curled and your body grew tight. One hand reached down to grab his hair while the other fisted the sheet beneath you. You let out one last moan as you felt your stomach fill with a tingling heat that slowly traveled all the way down to your thighs. Your hips sputtered and your eyes nearly rolled to the back of your head. That man just put you on cloud nine.
The moment he removed his hand from your mouth you let out a soft sigh. But he wasn"t done with you yet. He made that very clear when he grabbed your ankles and rolled you onto your stomach. You shuffled out of your shirt and felt his lips press into your back. Little sparks followed every patch of skin that he kissed. And when you felt his erection rub against your entrance your stomach clenched in excitement.
Yes, please.
He moved your hair to the left side of your neck and placed a kiss on your right shoulder. You peaked over your shoulder and your eyes met with his.
"I love you." He whispered.
Before you could even respond he moved his hips forward and you swallowed the moan that was threatening to come out. His hand traveled up your arm until it found yours. He gripped your hand just as he began to thrust his hips down. You couldn"t contain the light moans that slipped out as he continued lunging his hips back and forth.
There was just something about the way he was moving himself. . . It was just different. This wasn"t like any other usual hair-pulling-hips-slamming-fuck. In fact you didn"t even know what to make of it all. Especially because for this one time, it felt like he was making it all about you. He was rolling his hips forward in a fast pace, but he wasn"t harsh.
When you felt his lips brushing across your shoulder, you shuddered. It didn"t help that he was hitting all the right places. You peaked over your shoulder and felt his lips gently press into yours. Your lips parted and his tongue delved into your mouth as a moan slipped through.
He groaned and you felt his entire body tremble above you. His hips rocked and sputtered unevenly and that was when you felt your entire body clench tight.
"Fuck, Ivar." You mumbled against his lips.
Ivar kept going and you felt a warm glow illuminate your entire body as your inner walls clasped tight around his erection. Every part of your body was trembling and tingling and you were lost deep in the euphoric bliss. You heard Ivar hiss and then let out a loud groan as his warm seed spilled inside you.
The moment he rolled off of you there was a knock at the door. You gasped and quickly wrapped the sheet over the both of you. The door opened and in came that large german shepherd. He jumped right on the bed and began whining with excitement. His tail thumped against the matress as his face went right to yours.
You didn"t mind his company but you were curious as to who knocked and let him in. So you lifted your hand up and began to gently stroke his fur while your eyes searched the end of your bed.
"Boo!" Freya"s voice made you jump and turn.
How did she get there?
You heard both twins giggle. Freya was right beside you and Ragnar was beside Ivar.
"Mommy! I missed you!" Freya exclaimed as she crawled on the bed.
"Get out of bed lazy bones! Breakfast is ready. Uncle Ubbe made. . . Pancakes!" Ragnar jumped up and down.
"Okay. Alright. Ragnar, let Bullet out before he goes potty in the house. Freya, go wait at the table. Daddy and Mommy will be down shortly." Ivar instructed.
You turned to Ivar with a small smile on your lips.
"Does that mean Mommy"s out of time-out?" Freya asked.
Ivar nodded his head.
Both of the twins shouted and ran out the door with Bullet right behind them.
"There"s some new clothes for you in that dresser. We should head down and have breakfast before it gets cold." Ivar reached beside the bed and began putting on his leg braces.
You stood up and searched for some clothes. All the while, your brain had become jumbled in one confused thought. What was the next step after this? What should you do?
You honestly couldn"t afford to go on the run again, but your kids safety was always going to be your number one priority. While the younger version of yourself would have probably just bowed her head and allowed herself to stay, the newer and wiser version of yourself refused to take this. But you loved him. Oh, how your heart still yearned to be in his arms and you wanted him to be there for the kids.
If only he would stop being so stubborn and selfish as to give up the dangerous life he lives. Too bad for you, you already knew that day would never come.
As you reached in the drawer to grab a shirt and jeans something glistened in the sunlight. You gasped as you pulled your hand up and examined it closer. A cold chill ran down your spine and you swallowed the lump that was growing in your throat.
It was the wedding ring you used to wear before you took off with the twins.
"Something wrong, Wife?" Ivar"s voice came from behind you.
"You got my ring back." You pulled the shirt over your head and started to pull your jeans up your legs.
"Yes. That I did." He simply replied.
You quickly spun around. "Ivar, you know exactly why I ran away and you know we would have been safer if you just left us alone. You"re so blinded by the big futurne that you can"t see what I see."
Ivar stayed quiet as if he was processing your words.
"Look, I know very well about my past mistakes. But can you just give me one day? Just one day of us being a family again? I want to prove to you that the kids will be safe here."
You let out a sigh. "Just one day, Ivar. But I will let you know, I"m not gonna put up with the kidnapping, the lies and manipulation, and the chain you had me in. If you really love me and want us to be a family those will be the first to go."
"What"s the matter? Chains aren"t really in your kink?" He chuckled.
You stepped closer to him. "I am a mother now and I have grown in those years that I ran from you. Do not think for a second that Im just gonna sit down and take it."
He nodded his head. "Okay. You"re right."
"Mommy! Pancakes!" Freya shouted from downstairs.
You turned your back and made your way down the stairs. Freya was sitting at the table with Ragnar on her left and Hvitserk on her right. Ubbe was leaning against the kitchen island shoving a fork full of pancake and syrup in his mouth.
"Good morning." Hvitserk spoke between chewing his food.
"Uncle Hvitserk, we don"t talk with our mouths full." Ragnar commented.
You smiled and seated yourself across from the twins. "Good morning."
"Hey mommy, guess what!" Freya leaned into the table.
You started to pour syrup over the pancake on your plate. "What is it sweetie?"
"Daddy got me a horse! A real live horse! Her name is A Slug!" Freya nearly shouted in excitement.
"It"s Aslaug, Freya. Aslaug." Ivar entered the kitchen and made his way to sit right next to you.
Hvitserk chuckled and stood up. "I told you the kids would have trouble with that name."
"They will get it. They just need practice." Ivar spoke before digging into his pancake.
"Here. Have some coffee." Ubbe placed a coffee mug in front of you.
You could see Ivar glare at his brother through your peripheral vision but you decided to just shrug it off.
"Daddy, hurry with your pancakes! I want to see my horse. Can I ride her?" Freya jumped out of her seat.
"I said the same thing but it wasn"t your horse I was asking to ride." Hvitserk joked.
You nearly inhaled the food in your mouth when you heard him say that. Ivar shoved a piece of pancake in his mouth and chewed it as his eyes went to Hvitserk. He had a protective look in his eye. And even after he swallowed, he didn"t have to say a word. Hvitserk quickly got the memo.
Don"t ever joke like that in front of my kids.
Despite everything that happened between the two of you, it made your chest fill with warmth when Ivar became a protective daddy. Amd it definitely made him more attractive to you. Something you thought was impossible.
"Bullet! Come on." Ragnar opened the door.
You quickly turned to watch Bullet stroll in with his tail wagging.
Ivar stood from his seat and headed towards his son. He put his hand on the little boy"s shoulder.
"Remember this Ragnar, he"s your dog. So that means it is up to you to feed him, play with him, let him outside, and occasionally bathe him. We don"t want him getting too dirty." Ivar instructed.
Ragnar smiled at his dad and reached his hand up to pet the dog. "I will. I promise I will take real good care of you."
Bullet sat down while Ragnar continued to gently stroke his fur.
"And there are 3 important rules for you to remember. Don"t pull his fur, tail, or ears. If he wants space, give it him. He"ll come to you when he wants your attention. But most importantly, no kicking biting or scratching him. He is your friend, not a toy." Ivar leaned down and placed a kiss ontop of Ragnar"s head.
"Okay, Daddy." Ragnar replied.
You picked up your plate and started to clear off the table. "I"m not doubting what you are teaching our son, but you did say he was kid friendly right?"
Ivar began picking up the kids empty plates. "He is. I just think it"s important to teach kids about responsibilities and respecting their pets."
You had to hand it to him, he was right. And while you did believe some pets liked to have children climbing all over them, you would definitely want your kids to know the difference in playing with Bullet in a nice and safe way.
"Speaking of pets, how about we get these kids dressed and check out that horse?" You suggested.
***
It was almost frightening. Watching your little girl so high up on the horse with her hands holding onto the reins. Horses were taller than you remembered. What if she fell? What if Bullet scared the horse and she ran away with your daughter on her back?
Oh gods. You felt a panic attack coming on.
Ivar held onto the horse briddle and slowly walked the horse in a circle. He peaked over at you and started to laugh.
"Calm down, Y/N. It"s just a horse. She"s not gonna eat our kid." Ivar reminded you.
You inhaled a deep breath. Yet again, he was right. You didn"t need to worry so much.
"Bullet, drop it." Ragnar"s voice made you turn around.
Bullet dropped the bright neon green tennis ball. Ragnar grabbed the ball and offered his dog a gentle pat on the head.
"Good boy. Here. Fetch!" Ragnar tossed the ball over by the barn.
"Mommy, come see! Come here." Freya called out.
You slowly approached the horse and Ivar grabbed your hand. "Here. She really likes it, when you pet her here." He guided your hand to the side of her long neck.
Her soft fur pressed into your palm and your shoulders suddenly fell slump with ease. Freya leaned forward and ran her hand through the horses mane.
"See, Mommy? She"s a good horse." Freya explained.
You chuckled and continued to stroke the horse. "Yeah, she is. And she"s really pretty. Your daddy did a good job picking her out."
Ivar had his eyes on you. Out of the corner of your eyes you could see him smile. It was like a chain reaction. Your lips curled into a big, genuine smile. It felt like it had been forever since you did that.
The feeling of butterflies tickled your stomach and your chest glowed with warmth. But at the back of your mind you still worried about the big decision you had to make.
You looked up and notice the sky had turned a color of pink with random splashes of purple. Gods. . . Where did the day go?
"Alright, Freya we have to put Aslaug back in the barn for now. I"m going to show you how to take care of her just like I did with Ragnar and his dog." Ivar began walking the horse towards the barn.
You stayed close and watched as Ivar lifted the little girl off the horse and pulled up a stool.
"Here. Stand on it. Now take this brush and what we"re going to do is gently brush your horse." Ivar began to instruct her.
Watching him interact with the twins was making everything so hard. You would have never guessed that he had actually people before. Sure, you had no actual proof that he killed the man from the pawnshop that you sold your ring to. But the moment you saw the ring on your finger again, you just knew.
"Mommy, I"m hungry. I want to eat." Ragnar began tugging on your shirt.
"Good job. Why don"t you kids go in the house and wash up? I"ll finish feeding Askaug and meet you back in the house. I"m sure Hvitserk and Ubbe are working on dinner as we speak." Ivar suggested.
"Okay. Come on kids." You turned to head out towards the barn.
"Y/N." Ivar"s voice made you stop and peak over your shoulder.
He locked the stall and began walking towards you. You made sure that Freya and Ragnar was still right by you before you turned around to look at him. All it took was for you to be close to him and your heart began to race.
His hand lifted up to cup your cheek and his lips pressed into yours in a chaste kiss. "Today was a good day. You should think about staying."
"Yeah! Please Mommy!"
"We wanna stay with Daddy. Please Mommy!"
The twins begged as they tugged on your hands. As tempting as that was, you weren"t stupid. You knew that eventually there would be retribution fir Lagertha"s death. And if you or the kids were here when that happend. . . You couldn"t even imagine the outcome. Only if Ivar would find a way to put aside anything that could cause bullets going into your head, than you would stay.
"I will think about it, after we talk." You replied.
***
After dinner you began washing dishes while Ivar stood beside you and began drying them. You could have used the dishwasher, but there wasn"t alot of dishes and you didn"t mind it. Ragnar and Freya were sitting in the livingroom with Bullet. Apparently, they liked the idea of a movie night with Uncle Hvitserk and Uncle Ubbe.
"So. . ." Ivar began as he placed a plate in the cupboard. "What do you think?"
You searched your mind to find the right words. "I think the war is not over. There is still a threat out there."
"Bjorn." Ivar agreed. He leaned closer towards you. "You don"t have to worry about that. I will take care of him."
You shut the sink off and used a hand towel to dry your hands. "And then what happens when someone else from that side wants the throne?"
He didn"t have anything to say about that.
"Huh? What happens if we"re a family. We"re all happy and then suddenly someone comes around toting some gun and shoots us! Or one of the kids! What if I go to get in a car, turn the key and we blow up?" You questioned.
Ivar shook his head. "I won"t let that happen."
"How? You cannot physically be everywhere every second. And even if you were, you"re not made of bullet proof material. There are just some things you cannot prevent so why can"t you just give this up?" You asked.
"Because, this is not just a house. It"s not just a job. This is all my legacy. My father chose for it to be before he died. I watched him deal with many wars. He didn"t give it up and I sure in shit won"t." He argued.
"Even if it"s this or your family? I"m putting my foot down and saying you have to choose. The kids and I. . .or this." You waved your hands around to point at all the ridiculously expensive things he had.
"Why can"t I have both? I"ll hire fucking security, train you to use a gun. Y/N, please. Do not try to take my kids from me again." He nearly shouted but the last sentence came out as a soft whisper.
A soft plea.
A loud ringing came out of no where and nearly made you jump out of your own skin. Ivar pulled the phone out of his back pocket and answered it.
"Floki, I"m in the middle of something can this wait?" He asked.
You watched as his face went from irritation to pale as a ghost. He hung the phone up and looked down at the floor.
"What did he say?" You questioned.
Ivar shook his head. "Bjorn made a move. One of my guys was gunned down in my club."
You folded your arms over your chest and narrowed your eyes at Ivar"s face.
"Y/N, even if I sign everything over to Bjorn and become homeless on the streets, he won"t stop coming. I have no choice but to fight back." He justified.
You nodded your head. "But is my point finally being made here?" You wondered.
Ivar pressed his palms together and placed them in front of his face. At first you thought he was praying, but the distant look in his blue eyes proved otherwise. He was coming up with a plan.
"I promised I would keep you and the kids safe. So, that is what I am going to do." He replied.
You tried to stop your heart from racing but it was futile. Bjorn would likely be coming for you and the kids next. Especially if he had his men following Ivar.
"Y/N, listen to me. Listen." He placed both hands on your face and looked into your eyes. "I"m going to find a safe place for you and the kids. You won"t have to worry about anything. I will make sure that Bjorn thinks you are still missing. When I know for a fact that it is safe, I will come see you and the kids. And don"t worry about money. I have private accounts that no one knows about with over 12 million dollars. You and the kids will want for nothing." He offered.
You took a deep breath and felt tears grow in your eyes. All you wanted was a normal life. A family and what happened this morning between you and Ivar. . . It was practically magical.
"So, this is it then. It"s over." You blinked back your tears and reached for your ring.
Your hands trembled as you set it down on the counter.
"It won"t be forever. I promise you that." He commented.
You shook your head. "No, I really mean it, Ivar. You want to sneak away and spend some time with the kids. Fine, as long as it is safe and it"s not in the middle of one of your damn wars."
Ivar"s face twisted and you noticed his eyes began to water. "I"ll help you and the kids pack." He whispered.
***
Bullet dashed out the door and jumped right in the back seat. You sighed and turned to Ivar. Really? You didn"t mind taking Bullet. In fact, having him around would probably make you feel at ease. But you knew there was no way he would fit between the two carseats. He was just too big.
Ivar whitsled and Bullet looked at him with a sense of alertness. "Shotgun, Bullet."
Bullet looked in front and slowly crawled into the passenger seat before he sat down.
"You don"t think him coming with us will be too much on him, do you?" You questioned.
Ivar shook his head. "Bullet is already attached to Ragnar. He should be fine, but if he doesn"t want to eat or drink, let me know and I"ll find a way to bring him back. And he"s up to date on his shots."
"Well aren"t you a responsible dog owner. It"s good. I like it." You replied.
Ivar limped to the back of the trunk and placed a large duffle bag in it. Hvitserk came out of the house with a large bag of dog food over his shoulder.
"This bag has some clothes I bought for the kids. And uh. . . I want you to take this. So if you need anything. . ." Ivar pulled out a large stack of bills.
You couldn"t see the precise amount, it was still very dark. "Thanks. This is a big help. And I want you to know that I really appreciate you coming to terms with this."
Ivar let out a sigh. "I don"t think you realize how hard it is not to just chain you up to that bed again."
"The car seats are in and buckled. You want me to bring the kids out now?" Hvitserk offered.
"No, I want to hold them one last time." Ivar replied.
You opened up the drivers door and watched as Ivar carried Freya in his arms. Luckily she was fast asleep so there wouldn"t be a big fuss from her. Ivar stopped at the car and closed his eyes as he held her to his chest.
"Daddy loves you. I promise I will try to get you back home soon." He whispered as he softly placed her in her seat.
"You want me to -"
"I got it." Ivar clicked the harness in and tightend it so the clip was at shoulder level.
Damn. He really did his research.
"I"m going to get Ragnar. I"ll be right back." He stated.
"I"ll be here."
You turned to look in the passenger seat and noticed that Bullet was scratching at his window. You started the car up and rolled his window down. He stuck his large head out and sniffed the air.
"I don"t wanna go." Ragnar"s voice drew your attention.
"Trust me, I don"t want you to go, but you have to." Ivar replied as he walked by the passenger side.
"No. I wanna stay." Ragnar whined.
"Ragnar, you have to go. Daddy promises he will find a way to bring all of you home as soon as. . . "
His voice broke off and you could see his hands tremble. He sniffled.
"Your mother and I will find a way soon for us to be together again. Okay? I have things I need to take care of first." He cleared his throat and started to put Ragnar in his seat.
"Listen, I know this is hard for you. It is hard for me too. But we have to be strong. Alright?" He asked.
Ragnar growled. "Fine!" He snapped.
"And be good. Listen to Mommy. I love you." He placed a kiss on Ragnar"s head and shut the door.
This was harder than you expected. Watching your son cry in his carseat made your heart drop in your stomach. But you easily remembered that you didn"t cause this. Ivar was the stubborn one who wanted to play "war" with his oldest brother.
You blinked back tears and watched as Ivar approached you. He wrapped you in a tight embrace and tilted his head down to whisper in your ear.
"Hvitserk and Ubbe will escort you to the safe house." He whispered.
"What? You"re not gonna try to manipulate me to get me back?" You teased.
"No, you will come back to me. I know this for a fact because you love me." He replied seriously.
His lips placed a chaste kiss on your head and he released you from his hold. You sat down in the driver"s seat and shut the door. With one last glance at Ivar, you put the car in reverse and began to drive away.