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There was something Sarawat never understood, he’d wracked his brain about it but had only come up with more confusion and more questions.
Why didn’t Tine have his own fan club?
At this point he wasn’t necessarily angry about that because he wasn’t sure his reaction would be positive if his boyfriend was constantly surrounded by eager fangirls who wanted his attention or a minute of his time or a picture. That would drive him nuts. But before they got together, when they were fake dating and just friends, and before that still, when Sarawat just had the world’s biggest crush on the world’s dumbest boy, he never understood it. And he definitely didn’t understand why he was the only one who seemed to appreciate Tine in all his glory.
Well not the only one.
Tine had had relationships, long and brief, casual and serious but Sarawat never understood why he didn’t deserve and attract all sorts of attention. He was so handsome and sweet. And dumb, god he was dumb but that didn’t seem like enough to ward off people having crushes on him because they’d have to talk to him to know that he was an idiot. He was a good person, with a good heart, great taste in music and a goofy sense of humor. He was attractive as hell, with the most adorable smile and prettiest eyes and the best mouth. Wow. Okay, he was obviously not the most objective on this matter but even though he was a goner, even though he was hopeless he still figured he was in a good position to wonder why people didn’t flock to Tine. Because he loved him.
He was gentle and so unapologetically himself. He wore what he wanted, liked the things he liked and didn’t let others con him out of it if it didn’t seem to fit the stereotypical bill, they would’ve stuck him with. Sure, Sarawat knew that a lot of Tine’s motives when he first got to university were girl focused, he joined cheerleading to be around girls and almost joined the swim club for a pretty girl in a swimsuit, but he liked cheerleading now and didn’t care what anyone thought about that.
He also loved that he was kind of cocky. Not because it was a good thing but because he liked how content Tine was in his own skin. Objectively he was hot as hell and Sarawat found himself, multiple times a day wanting to be closer to him than publicly acceptable and he always craved more of him even when they were already entangled. It wasn’t necessarily about looks though. He knew Tine was attractive and Tine knew that he was attractive, it was more that he was happy with himself. He’d worked hard for his body, taken care of himself, looked after his appearance and those things made him happy. That’s why Sarawat liked it because Tine was happy.
He was also so kind to the people he cared about and the people around him that Sarawat worried sometimes that someone, someday might take advantage of that. Might use it against him. And he was oblivious and gullible that he’d fall for anything. But even though it gave him chest pains and a head ache to think about how Tine might fall for stupid shit often, he loved him for his goodness and hoped he’d never change.
All of that and so much more made Sarawat crazy about him but he just didn’t understand why other people didn’t love him too. Why did he have to beg people for attention? Why, when he first got to school, did people only want Sarawat’s attention but not Tine’s? Sarawat would’ve died on the spot for Tine to look at him like he’d once looked at Pear and prayed to any higher powers who’d listen to have Tine spare him a moment. How come people didn’t share that sentiment?
He supposed it didn’t much matter now. Especially since they’d come out of the other side of all that together and if he was the only one who paid Tine any proper attention that was fine because he ended up with him in the end. Sometimes though, like now, when he was at practice with the law faculty’s cheerleaders practicing on the other end of the field, he caught the way Tine was smiling at their advisor and it made him wonder. The way the wind swept his hair back, laughter lifted and bright while the sunshine made him light up and Sarawat couldn’t breathe, how come he was the only one affected by him like that?
Even now, even though the whole school knew they were dating, the girls on his squad still screamed whenever they saw him and fanned themselves like they’d overheated but they spent hours with Tine, why did he never see them do that because of him? Sarawat knew he wasn’t crazy, Tine was a catch.
Maybe everyone else was just blind.
~
He was waiting at the field, showered and changed after practice because he and Tine were going to dinner when the thoughts of how lucky he was and how stupid everyone else was, hit him once again.
That’s how Tine found him, spacing out on one of the benches surrounding the field. Distantly, he heard some giggling and light chatter but Tine’s voice, Tine’s laughter was what truly caught his attention.
“What’s up Wat?”
Sarawat smiled up at him, squinting against the sun that was blazing a halo around Tine’s body. “Just waiting for you,”
The answer earned him a bunch of squealing from the rest of the squad that was still hanging around, probably waiting so they could see more of him, not waiting for Tine, their teammate.
“You were pouting, are you okay?”
Sarawat stood up, humming in answer. He reached out to catch Tine when he staggered, probably shocked at his sudden move, thinking he was too comfortable sitting.
“Wat,” he whispered, let Sarawat nudge closer to him.
“I was thinking about you,”
Tine laughed, “that made you look upset?”
“Wasn’t upset,”
“Promise?”
Sarawat nodded, moved forward quick to kiss him which made Tine blush and the girls still huddled off to the side scream a little. Why did they still stick around to see him when he was never going to be interested in them. They could see that he was happy and taken, couldn’t they just leave them be?
“Go shower and change so we can go eat,” he gave him a squeeze before letting him go, hoped he’d be quick about it since he already felt at a loss without him against him.
“Okay,” Tine whispered, lip caught behind his teeth. Sarawat ducked forward to kiss him one more because he was so adorable, and he couldn’t help himself.
Sarawat watched him go, watched the girls trail after him while sparing Sarawat a few glances over their shoulders but his boyfriend looking back at him was what he’d been waiting for. He smiled at him when he turned, watched with his heart in his throat when Tine grinned from ear to ear, cheeks pink in the sunshine. From the sun itself or the attention, he couldn’t be sure, but he liked it either way.
~
Later that night, laid out in Tine’s bed with Tine propped against him, staring him down, he asked him again if he was alright.
“I’m fine,”
“What were you really thinking about that made you look so annoyed earlier?”
“You,”
Tine whined, “me, seriously?!” His hand balled up to thump his chest, huffed a few curses under his breath. Sarawat kneaded his fingers into the small of his back to relax him. The effect was instant as Tine melted back against him.
“You weren’t the reason I was annoyed,”
Tine looked like this entire conversation was bothering him now, eyebrows pinched in confusion the longer he sat there silent.
“Then what was?”
“Other people,”
Tine huffed, “it’s hard to talk to you sometimes,”
Sarawat gave him a look but squeezed him harder. They were quiet for a while following that. Tine had dropped to lay his head on his shoulder while his fingers took up drawing patterns on his naked skin. His breathing was starting to even out, heart beat steady where it was thrumming against his own ribs. Sarawat debated saying anything at all, knowing it would get Tine going and he might not get him to shut up about it. But he could tell he’d annoyed him by being cryptic and he didn’t want him to fall asleep if he was feeling some sort of bad way because of him. So, he sucked up what he was feeling and committed to this. It wasn’t like Tine didn’t know that he was a sucker.
“You should have a fan club,”
He could feel Tine’s amusement before he saw it.
“What?” he said on a laugh, picked his head up again to look at him. “What are you talking about,”
Sarawat shrugged.
“Wat,” he whined, ducked forward to dig his nose into his cheek. “You can’t leave me hanging like that,”
“You’re cute. And handsome and sweet and such a dork, I don’t get why I have a fan club and you don’t,” he admitted, watched, pleased as color took over Tine’s face and ears.
“Well you’re perfect that’s why you have one,” he whispered, pressed a soft kiss to the corner of his mouth which made Sarawat’s insides tighten up and wish for more.
He had a cheesy comment loaded about how he thought Tine was pretty perfect too. Instead he said, “Think I’m gonna start one for you,”
Tine laughed against him, “oh yeah?”
“Yeah, the admission cap will be one,”
“One?”
“Yup me, and if people ask if they can join, I’ll tell them we’re not taking new applicants,”
“You’re ridiculous,”
“Let’s see how ridiculous you think I am when you see the fan page, I’m gonna make you,”
“Isn’t that just your Instagram?”
“Listen-” Sarawat started but Tine’s laughter distracted him and the way he rolled fully on top of him and started kissing him made him lose his train of thought completely.
Sarawat decided right then, that if no one else was going to acknowledge how awesome Tine was he’d just make sure that Tine never forgot. He could worship him and adore him enough for the rest of the world. They probably wouldn’t do it right anyway.