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Two Ghosts in One Mirror

Summary:

Bucky isn't ready to deal with Steve and his memories yet and lays low with Rumlow. That they're both hunted by rogue ex-shield agents who want to take their revenge on Hydra complicates things a little.

Notes:

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Winter, no James, he reminded himself, his name was James, found being in a hospital at night eerie and somewhat unsettling. Outside of the emergency room the hallways were dim and empty. But then that was exactly the reason why he had come. Only he wasn’t the only one doing so.

When he entered Rumlow’s room he found another man in there, trying to strangle him. Rumlow had either already lost consciousness or he was too numbed by the medication to feel anything.

James crossed the room with two quick steps and snapped the assassin’s neck before the man had fully realized he was there.

“Winter?” Rumlow rasped. He was rubbing his neck and looked bemused about the situation. There were bandages around his left arm while the right one was in a cast and his face was covered in what looked like half-healed burns. “What the fuck is going on?”

“Hydra fell. You’re not safe here.”

Rumlow looked at the body to James’ feet. “No shit Sherlock.”

James took a step towards him. “Can you walk?”

“I woke up three seconds ago. How would I know?” Considering he looked James suspected the answer was no. “Did Pierce send you here?”

“Pierce is dead”, James said. He wasn’t sure how he felt about that yet. Even with his memories slowly returning now that he hadn’t been put on stasis or wiped for two weeks, there were too many conflicting feelings. He slung his metal arm around Rumlow’s waist to help him out of bed, who could just about manage to stand even if his knees were trembling. “I have a car.”

They made it out of the hospital without running into anyone else, staff or assassins. James had a good idea who was trying to kill Rumlow and was only surprised that they had waited this long.

Rumlow was too busy gritting his teeth and concentrating on putting one foot after another to say anything until he was sitting in the backseat of the car James had appropriated. “Where are we going?”

“If they found your hospital room they know where you live. We can’t go back there.”

“One, who’s they? Two, what are you doing here Winter? And three, I’d like some proper clothes.” He was only in a hospital gown which was neither practical nor inconspicuous.

“My name’s not Winter. It’s James, James Barnes.” It felt good to say it to another person. Especially someone who knew him as Winter.

“So you figured that one out.”

“You knew?” James didn’t know whether it surprised him or not.

“Not until they put Rogers on my team and I went to that exhibition the Smithsonian has but yeah, I knew.”

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

“I was under orders not to. If you know what are you doing here? Shouldn’t you be with Rogers, if he’s still alive.”

“He is”, James said. He had made sure of that at least. Steve was fine and he was with his friends. Friends who hadn’t tried to kill him.

“Then why aren’t you – “

“I can’t”, James interrupted him before he could finish the question. “Don’t ask.”

Rumlow hesitated but then he asked, “Where’s Jack?”

“Dead.” James could see the pain of the news flicker through Rumlow’s eyes. He wondered if Steve had had that expression on his face when he had fallen off the train.

///////

James drove the whole night while Rumlow was dozing in the backseat. He startled awake several times as if he was in pain, which James knew he had to. In the early hours of the morning he stopped in front of a motel and got them a room before waking Rumlow up. He didn’t have a plan of where to go exactly, not yet but then planning ahead had never been his strong suit.

“You broke into my apartment?” Rumlow asked when James dropped a bag on the bed.

“Someone else broke in and left the door open”, James replied. He took his shirt off and revealed a bandage wrapped around his torso amongst an array of bruises that turned his skin into a palette of green, yellow, purple and blue.

“Is that from your fight with Rogers?” Rumlow asked.

“Partially, but mostly from the same rogue Shield agents that tried to kill you. I’m Hydra after all even if I didn’t want to be.”

“You’d be dead without Hydra.”

James let out a humourless laugh. “I’d prefer that compared to the last seventy years.” He remembered the expression Rumlow had had on his face whenever he had been wiped, so James wasn’t surprised when Rumlow didn’t reply to that. He watched as Rumlow tried to put a shirt on and couldn’t manage to lift his right arm or rather move his shoulder properly to lift his arm.

“What’s wrong with your arm?” James asked.

“Do I look like a fucking doctor to you?” Rumlow snapped, obviously not trying to show how bad he was hurt. James was less familiar with Rumlow being hurt than he would’ve thought, but their missions had generally been successful.

James shrugged and laid down on the bed. “You’ll be on watch for the next couple hours. Think you can manage?”

“Whatever you say, boss”, Rumlow mocked. In a way this felt familiar, the two of them lying low. They had done it often enough over the last couple year and it had made them into a pretty good team.

///////

They repeated the same pattern for the next few days without interruption. James drove the whole night while Rumlow slept and found some motel to sleep in for the day. They ate in diners or bought junk food from petrol stations. Rumlow never asked where the money was coming from and James had no reason to tell him. They didn’t talk much anyway.

“James”, Rumlow said, purposefully looking at his burger. “Man and a woman, just came in.”

“Shield?”

Rumlow shrugged. “Hopefully. Means they won’t shoot in here.”

“Or so you’d hope”, James replied with a faint trace of sarcasm. “Let’s wait it out, maybe you’re wrong.”

“And if not?”

“We’ll fight. Not like you can run, can’t you?”

“I forgot what a cocky bastard you are when you haven’t been on ice for a while”, Rumlow said because he knew James was right. He was still to injured for running.

“Fuck you”, James replied, keeping his eyes on the food.

“And yet, you’re still here.” Rumlow looked out of window when he added, “Thanks for saving my life by the way.”

“I didn’t have anything better to do.” He remembered bantering with Steve like this, remembered Rumlow and Rollins doing it as well.

“Obviously”, Rumlow said dryly and to his own surprise James found himself smiling at that.

///////

Their next encounter with Hydra hunting Shield agents didn’t go over as well. They had parked on the side of a country road to eat breakfast when another car drove by and opened fire on them.

James and Rumlow reacted on instinct, getting behind the car to get cover and returning the fire.

“Did you see how many there are?” James asked, cursing himself for letting his guard down. Pierce would have never allowed for either of them to be so sloppy but then Pierce was dead.

“Three. At least one of them was a level 7 Shield agent”, Rumlow answered. James could see blood running down his right arm where he had been hit.

“Hey Rumlow”, one of the Shield agents yelled, “If I take off your head will you grow two pretty ones in return?”

James had a plan on how to take them out. He made a sign at Rumlow who nodded to show that he had understood and opened fire on the opposite car. James leapt out from behind his cover and over the vehicle to shoot the three people behind it. The first one of them was dead before his feet touched ground and the other two followed within a heartbeat. “Clear”, he yelled.

“Nice work”, Rumlow said as he walked over, pressing a hand to his arm.

“We’ll take their car”, James said. “It’s less damaged than ours.” He looked at Rumlow. “You were hit.” For some reason he felt the urge to touch him, to make sure he wasn’t injured anywhere else.

“I noticed that, believe me.”

“Can you hold on a little longer? We don’t have the supplies to deal with this right now.”

“I’ll live.”

“You better”, James said before he could stop himself.

Rumlow gave him a strange look but didn’t reply.

///////

Operating a bullet wound inside a motel room seemed like a sure-fire way to attract attention so James bought what he needed at the next convenience store and parked their new car away from the road.

Rumlow frank the shitty vodka that James had used to sterilize the wound. It was better than nothing to take his mind of the pain that would come. James remembered Hydra not giving him anything when he had gotten his new arm. He remembered Zola saying that the pain would render him unconscious sooner or later anyway. They had never given him painkillers before or after wiping him either until he had been assigned to Rumlow’s team.

“You gave me painkillers”, James said when the memory came back to him.

“So?” Rumlow asked, obviously not making the connection.

“Nothing, just...thanks”, James replied. He felt better at the memory because it meant his instinct of hiding with Rumlow instead of any other Hydra agent he had worked with had been justified.

“Can we get this over with before you get all maudlin at me for – “he didn’t get any further because James dug into his arm and Rumlow’s words were replaced with a scream.

Afterwards, while James wrapped a bandage around Rumlow’s arm, he asked, still obviously drunk, “Why me?”

“You’re hunted by shield, I’m hunted by shield. It seemed like a good idea.” He didn’t mention that Rumlow was the last person on earth Steve would suspect him being with. But James didn’t want to think about Steve, not now and not in the near future.

“As if you couldn’t handle them on your own”, Rumlow scoffed.

“Maybe I don’t want to.”

“I should’ve just died”, Rumlow said. “Would’ve been so much easier.”

James felt angry all of a sudden. “Don’t ever say that again”, he hissed. “I didn’t get the easy way out so you don’t get it either.”

“You could make it easier for yourself. Go to Rogers. Bet he’d be ecstatic to have you back. Would get all those pesky Shield agents off you.” There was something bitter in his tone.

“No.” He didn’t know how to explain that Steve didn’t know him anymore. That Steve didn’t need him anymore.

///////

The next time it was James who got shot. Ironically by two Hydra agents who knew he had been Bucky Barnes once and thought that he was working with Steve now that Pierce was gone. He had gone into the grocery store alone, leaving Rumlow dozing in the passenger seat of their car. They hadn’t had an encounter in weeks and so James had left him sleeping.

He could feel their eyes on him, whispering to each other. Pretending to study the magazines lined up under the window he watched their reflections. Letting himself fall to the floor the moment they got their weapons out saved his life but they were too close not to miss. He felt the bullet graze his side as he kicked the feet out from under them. Someone screamed. Getting up to his knees he slammed one guy’s head into the floor while twisting the weapon out the hand of the other guy, hearing the ugly crunch of a broken bones.

“As if you’d kill us”, the second guy sneered despite the first one not moving. “Rogers wouldn’t let you. Tell us, little lapdog, where is he?”

“What do you want with him?”

“Cut of one head, two more will grow back. Rogers doesn’t know what he unleashed”, the second guy continued.

“Neither do you”, James said and snapped his neck.

“James, what the fuck – “ Rumlow stood in the entrance. His eyes widened slightly when he saw the two men lying at James’ feet. “They were Hydra.”

“They thought I’m working with Steve”, James explained. The irony wasn’t lost on him.

“Fuck, you’re hurt.” It seemed to upset him more than the death of his colleagues.

“I’m fine”, James said, lifting his shirt a little so Rumlow could see it was only a graze.

“Sure”, Rumlow replied, his fingers brushing over James’ skin just underneath the wound. The contact was brief but it sent shivers through his body.

“Let’s go”, James said. “I have their car keys.”

“Are we ever going to go anywhere or just drive around for the rest of our lives?” Rumlow asked as they walked out. They could hear sirens already in the distance.

James shrugged and pulled the bag with their belongings from the trunk. “We could go to Europe.”

“And drive around there for the rest of our lives? Or only until Rogers finds you?” Rumlow added because he knew just as much as James that Steve was looking for him.

“That’s none of your business”, James snapped. And because he was Rumlow and not Steve, he did drop the subject.

///////

“Before we’re hitting the beach I should ask whether you can swim or not”, Rumlow said as they got out of their car. They had made it all the way to California and Rumlow had suggested they’d take advantage of that.

James gave him a long, exasperated look.

“Your arm’s made of metal. You could sink like a stone and I’m not in the shape to rescue you.”While most of his injuries had healed by now Rumlow was still unable to lift his right arm, but there wasn’t much they could do about it while on the run. “Or maybe it’s not waterproof.”

“In case you didn’t notice, I did not electrocute myself in the shower in the past three months so why should I now? And yes, I can swim. Why shouldn’t I?”

“You can’t cook, either”, Rumlow replied, pushing the diner’s door open.

“No, I can cook. Hydra just made me forget it. Apparently they didn’t think it was an essential skill for an assassin to – “

Of all the diners in this country he had to walk into the one that Steve was sitting in. Their eyes met and James couldn’t have said who was more shocked, he or Steve. “Bucky.”

Steve looked like shit. The two of them had been on the run for months but they still looked more put together than Captain Fucking America. He looked as if he’d been wading through hell, following the thinnest thread of hope to save somebody he loved. The same somebody that had run from him as hard and fast as he could.

“Bucky, I – “ Steve made a move towards him but suddenly Rumlow pushed James out of the way just before the bullets broke the diner’s windows. People screamed, cowering in fear and James could see that Steve’s new friend had pulled him down as well. Frantically James looked around for Rumlow only to see him slumped against the counters, grey t-short soaking with blood.

James wanted to go to him but Rumlow caught his eyes and shook his head.

There was another hail of bullets and then they came, ten men, through the door and the broken windows. James couldn’t tell whether they were Shield or Hydra and he didn’t care. He found Rumlow’s eyes again and waited for his nod. Rumlow wasn’t a good shot with his left hand by any means but it would have to be enough.

And it was. He hadn’t been Hydra’s best assassin over the past seventy years for nothing. He ignored Steve’s eyes on him, ignored how desperately he wanted to run and hide. Maybe he had finally hit the end of the road.

“We need to get him to a hospital”, James said, kneeling down next to Rumlow.

“Bucky”, Steve said again and then, noticing who was with them, frowned. “Rumlow?”

“No need”, Rumlow rasped. “We’re both taking the easy way from here.”

“Don’t you fucking dare”, James yelled. “This won’t end here.”

“Bucky, what’s going on?” Steve asked.

“Later, Steve. I need to get him to a hospital first.”

“Take care of him, Cap”, Rumlow said, closing his eyes.

Sirens sounded in the distance, coming closer. “You hear that?” James asked Rumlow. “You’re not getting out of this.” He took him by the shoulders and shook him, knowing it had to hurt like hell, until Rumlow opened his eyes again.

“I should’ve died months ago. You can’t always save my life.”

“I can and I will. You owe me.” He could feel something else building up behind the anger. I’m scared, he almost said, which he had never wanted to admit to anyone before, not even when he had still been Bucky Barnes.

“Why me?” Rumlow asked and James kissed him before he could really think about what he was doing, trusting his instinct to lead him right again.

“That’s why”, he said but Rumlow was too dazed to reply before the paramedics came in.

Only then James realised that Steve was still right next to him.

///////

“Guess you have questions”, James said while they were waiting in the emergency room. Sam, Steve’s friend, had gone to get them coffee and something to eat.

“One or two”, Steve replied but then pulled James into a bone-crushing hug. “Mostly I’m just happy to have you back.”

“Me, too”, James choked out, crushed by the shame that he had run from Steve for this long. He let go of him and started to explain but Steve shook his head.

“I’m sure you had good reasons for what you did. Just, Rumlow of all people?”

Trust Steve to pick on the one thing James couldn’t even explain to himself, so he shrugged. “He was my team leader. Guess it felt natural to go to him.”

“And did being on his team require kissing?”

James shook his head. “That was actually my first kiss since 1945.”

“Oh”, Steve said.

“Mr. Barnes?” A doctor asked.

“That’s me”, James answered and stood up, trying to ignore his heart pounding in his chest.

“We were able to remove the three bullets from his chest and he should recover but there’s shrapnel from an older injury that needs to be removed if he wants to regain the use of his right arm ever again.”

James nodded. “Can I see him?”

“Of course. He should wake up shortly”, the doctor said.

“Do you want me to come with you?” Steve asked but James shook his head. “Just give me a few minutes.”

///////

“This seems awfully familiar”, Rumlow said when James stepped through the curtain surrounding his bed.

“No one’s tried to strangle you yet”, James replied.

“Rogers will, especially after that stunt you pulled. What was that about?”

“I could ask you the same thing. You kissed me back.”

“Rogers will kill me for that alone. So I hope you enjoyed it while it lasted.”

“I won’t let him.” James sat down on the edge of Rumlow’s bed.

“Are you two on speaking terms now or should I ready myself for another road trip?” Rumlow asked.

“I don’t know”, James smiled. “We never did make it to Europe, did we?”