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Math, Exy and Middle Ground

Chapter 5: Epilogue

Summary:

Andrew is nervous about something. Wonder what it might be about. Mhmm.

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

Three months later

 

“How did your thesis thing go?”

Neil looked over at Aaron, who was halfway up a ladder, struggling to reach the top of the window.

“Thesis defense, you mean.”

“Yeah, yeah. That,” Aaron grumbled, shaking the duster a little too vigorously, coughing.

“It’s all done. I’ll be getting my PhD soon,” Neil grinned, relief palpable in his voice.

“Hey, Aaron. Looks like Neil will become a doctor before you,” Andrew drawled lazily from the couch, and Katelyn burst into laughter while Aaron scowled from atop his perch.

Neil was still getting used to having people around him, but he found that he didn’t mind this, whatever it was. Of late, he felt something warm slice through him every time he caught Andrew surreptitiously looking at him, and he struggled to put a name to it. Aaron and Katelyn had accepted him into their fold easily and Neil didn’t know how to feel about that, either. He got on well with Nicky and Erik too, considering their unfortunate first meeting.

The last time he had met Nicky, it was before he had left for Germany. He had given Neil his number while Andrew scowled. Neil would have teased Andrew about it, but the prospect of actually texting Nicky had filled him with dread, until Andrew put a hand on his neck and calmed him down.

“I can hear you thinking from here,” Andrew muttered, nudging Neil’s thigh with his toes.

The word family had crossed Neil’s mind multiple times in the past few months, but he took a deep breath and pushed the panic down.

He merely took Andrew’s hand in his and attempted to ground himself. Aaron and Katelyn were bickering about something in the distance, the remains of breakfast were still on the table, the television was playing some action movie that Andrew was watching with unconcerned interest, and sunlight streamed in through the now-clean windows.

Neil felt something close to contentment. He squeezed Andrew’s fingers and closed his eyes. It wasn’t all bad.

**

Andrew tapped his foot nervously.

One, two, three, four.

He grimaced and kept his offending foot in check. Andrew did not do nervous. He did not, thank you very much. His junkie was asleep next to him on the couch and he was feeling all kinds of warm. He squinted at the sunlight, as though glaring at it would make it go away.

One, two, three, four.

Goddamit. Fine, he was nervous. It was hard, admitting that, even to himself. Progress, Bee would say. Stupidity, his mind supplied.

Aaron plopped onto the table. “So, did you-”

Andrew shushed him hurriedly, gesturing to the sleeping idiot next to him. Aaron raised a single eyebrow in response. “Do it soon.”

“Or what?”

He just smirked. The audacity.

“Do what?” Neil stirred groggily, before his eyes widened. “Shit, did I fall asleep?”

Andrew carded his fingers through his messy auburn hair and thought “I don’t deserve this” for the twelfth time that day. He could hear Bee’s disapproval in his head.

“Yeah, junkie. We should be leaving.”

They said their goodbyes to Aaron and Katelyn and sauntered toward the Maserati.

Andrew took a deep breath, partly to calm himself and partly in a bid to stall some more.

“Neil.”

“Hmm?” Neil turned around, stilling when he saw Andrew looking at him intently.

Andrew chickened out at the last minute and went for “yes or no” instead. He pinned Neil to the hood of his car and proceeded to kiss the questions out of him. Neil looked breathless and debauched by the time Andrew was done and he gave himself a pat on the back for it.

They got into the car, and right before he could start it up, Aaron’s annoying voice popped into his head.

Do it. Do it. Do it.

He didn’t want to do it like this. Neil deserved better, but he didn’t know how else to do it. He didn’t know what the appropriate amount of time one waited before asking, he didn’t know if other people felt this way too – constantly on the edge, close to the sun, alive but also burning away at the same time.

This felt like falling.

“Andrew?” He sounded concerned now. But his voice, as always, was gentle. Andrew hated it. He hated that it made him feel some type of way. That Neil’s tone – usually sharp and biting and unforgiving – turned impossibly soft when directed at Andrew.

Do I deserve this?

He cleared his throat. “You know my off-season is ending.” Who was he kidding, of course the junkie knew.

“Yes,” Neil replied, brows furrowing.

“I will have away matches.”

“Um, yes. I know.” Brows still furrowed. More confusion.

Andrew cleared his throat again and felt the back of his neck grow hot. For fuck’s sake Andrew, get a grip.

“I don’t want to get news that your death trap of an apartment finally did you in.”

Neil frowned. “My apartment is not a death trap.”

Andrew sighed. “Do you have a fire exit?”

“No.”

“A burglar alarm?”

“No.”

“More than one window?”

“Um.”

“The kitchen doesn’t count.”

“Then, no.”

“A working elevator?”

“I take the stairs.”

“Neil.”

“I don’t understand what you’re getting at.”

Andrew sighed in frustration and took it out of his pocket and shoved it at Neil.

Neil looked at the black box in surprise and then shock.

“Andrew, what?” he stuttered.

“Open it.”

“Andrew-”

“Open it, or I’m getting out of the car.”

Neil fumbled with the box for a second before he managed to open it, fingers shaking.

And looked down at a key.

**

A key. A golden key. A copy, a duplicate, but still a key.

He was quiet. He was sure Andrew could hear his heart thundering, as though it was fighting to beat its way out of his chest.

He looked up to find Andrew studying his nails, cheeks tinted pink, eyebrows drawn together in an uncertain frown.

He opened his mouth but Andrew beat him to it. “Will you move in with me?”

Some part of Neil’s brain was expecting the question, but he still felt unsteady. He took out the key and traced its ridges before folding it into the palm of his hand. It was grounding, solid and tethered him to the present much like its owner.

He took the liberty of extending two fingers to Andrew and tilting his chin up.

“Yes or no?”

Andrew looked into his eyes, searching for something he did not know he could want. “Yes.”

Neil pulled him in for a kiss, one hand cupping his left cheek, the other resolutely holding onto the key. His key.

“I will,” he breathed, inches away from Andrew’s lips.

If either of them felt warmth lancing through them – foreign, familiar and new, they didn’t mention it. They would learn to embrace it soon enough.

Notes:

Thank you for staying with this till the end! I loved all your comments and feedback and I hope you liked this fic of mine. xx

Notes:

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