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Kristoff was used to being alone.
He’d known nothing else as long as he had known loneliness. And whilst he had Sven, even he had to admit that he was talking to himself in a goofy voice. He was just fine with it being the two of them, just as it always had been.
And then she had infiltrated their lives and made everything complicated and wonderful and a little ray of hope began to shine through, convincing him that maybe being alone wasn’t the path for him and maybe, just maybe, she could be the answer to all the questions he had never dared to ask himself.
But she wasn’t for him, she belonged to another. Which was why he was stood on the wrong side of the castle gates, watching her being taken away from him, his chest burning with all the things he didn’t say.
So yes, Kristoff was used to being alone. And he was fine with it. Totally fine.
*
They’re halfway up the mountain when Sven makes a whiny sound and jumps in front of him.
What is it buddy?” Sven is more aggressive with his sounds now and moves towards him, fury resting in those large eyes. “Hey watch it! What’s wrong with you?”
Sven makes another sound, one he isn’t used to hearing and he already knows what this is about. If he can just ignore it- and him- a little longer, then Anna and Arendelle will be out of his mind, and heart, forever.
“I don’t understand you when you talk like that.”
But Sven isn’t one for backing down and within moments, he has Kristoff in his antlers and is pushing him down towards the mountains.
“Stop it! Put me down!” He’s thrown to the floor, snow covering all parts of him and he feels a warm breath of air coming from Sven’s nose. “No Sven, we’re not going back!” He wipes himself down as Sven makes another non-committal noise. “She’s with her true love!”
It breaks his heart to admit it out loud; he had been avoiding all thoughts of her since leaving her at the gates. He knew it was the right thing to do though; true love was the only thing that was going to save her now and well... that was Hans and not him.
“Come on Sven, it’s time to go home. Anna doesn’t need me anymore.” He says, pushing on without waiting for an answer from his reluctant reindeer.
He’s only vaguely aware of the wind picking up around him.
*
“I’m fine Sven, really. It doesn’t even matter. It’s been weeks now and I’m over it. I don’t even remember her name so it’s cool.”
It had been 4 weeks since the eternal winter had ended and summer had returned, so Kristoff was right in assuming that everything had worked out for the best and that Anna was happy with her ‘true love’.
He had returned to Arendelle a week ago; ice season was upon them and so he needed to make some contacts, ready for the harvest. Every part of him burned upon his arrival, it was like his body knew she was nearby and so had decided to remind him of every moment they had shared together.
Kristoff had been so determined to forget everything about Anna and their adventure up the North Mountain but he was kidding himself of course; he remembered every damn detail of her.
The way her eyes lit up when he agreed to help her, the way her freckles danced across her cheeks in the morning light, the way she had felt in his arms when he caught her. It was taking every bit of his willpower to not head over to the castle, break down those gates and her door and beg her to return to him. Not that he needed to break down any gates anymore, they were wide open now, allowing anything out and anyone in.
If he was a forceful man, he would storm that castle and find her. If he was a gambling man, he would risk everything and tell her how he felt. But Kristoff Bjorgman was neither a forceful nor a gambling man, so he just had to sit and hope that one day he would find his true love- one that wasn’t already engaged to another.
*
He should have known he would run into her at some point.
He’d been in Arendelle for 2 months now and so far had managed to avoid any of the royal ceremonies or festivities. He was only intending to stick around another day or so before heading off to start his ice harvest when it was announced the Queen and Princess were coming for a royal tour of the city.
He isn’t sure how long he’s got but he’s determined not to be seen by either one of them, knowing it’ll break him if he even captures a glimpse of her. He’s packing up his bag when the trumpets start and he’s desperate to stop the burning in his chest and where on earth is his rope? Everything is quickening and he can hear the trumpets ringing in his ears; she’s getting closer and closer and closer.
He looks up now and can see the carriage up ahead and if he’s quick enough he can grab Sven and leave but Sven is nowhere to be seen, because why would his loyal companion be nearby when he needs him, and he can feel the sweat breaking out across his forehead.
“Sven? Sven?! Where are you?” Kristoff is crying out now, whispers turning harsher and harsher as the carriage draws ever closer. He looks across the road and there he is! “Sven! Get over here!” He starts to make a move towards him at the same time the carriage stops and all at once his world stops spinning.
Her hair is just as red as it was the first time they met, he notices the blonde streak is gone (damn Hans and his true loves kiss). Her petite frame is swallowed by the large gown and cape she is wearing but she’s still just as perfect as he remembers. He knows he needs to move and hide but it’s like the ice has returned and frozen every part of his body. He forgets how to do anything; breathe, live, speak... everything is Anna, Anna, Anna.
He notices she’s chatting to Sven now and before his brain gets back into gear, Sven is nodding in his direction and she’s turning around and holy hell, she’s beautiful. It takes her a moment to find him in the crowd but then she sees him and her face lights up, just like it did on the mountain. She hasn’t changed, not really. Her face is a little gaunter than he remembers, and there’s a spark or two missing from her eyes, but she’s still Anna and she’s still the girl he has been longing for all this time. She wanders over to the carriage, mutters something he knows he’ll never hear and within seconds, the carriage is gone, the crowd is gone and it’s just the two of them, together.
“Hello Kristoff.”
“Hello... Anna. I mean, Princess Anna.”
They remain silent for minutes, or it could be days, Kristoff isn’t sure. Time is flying past as he stares at her face, drinking in every detail.
“How have you been?” Her voice is angelic, if not a little sad, and he knows she is different but he can’t quite put his finger on it.
“Oh you know, busy! Ice season is nearby so I’m just preparing for that. How’s... how’s life been treating you?” He stumbles on his words, desperate to ask about Hans and desperate to not ask about Hans.
“Oh you know...” It doesn’t escape him that she’s copied his phrase and a small smile tugs at the corner of his lips. “It’s been okay. Bit weird since the whole freezing of the kingdom thing but I think everything is going back to normal now. And you know Elsa and I are actually speaking again which is amazing, it was like we’d never been apart, well it took us a little while to get back to how we were but we’re almost there and it’s wonderful and oh Kristoff, it’s so good to see you!” She is looking at him full force now and all he can think is I miss you, I miss you, I miss you.
“It’s good to see you too, Princess.” He is dying to ask about Hans, dying to find out if she’s happy with him, dying to ask whether she misses their time together but that’s not his place anymore. He is Kristoff, the iceman and she is Anna, Princess of Arendelle.
“Kristoff, you don’t have to call me that. Please, just call me Anna.” Her voice breaks on her name and her eyes begin to fill with tears. “I’ve missed you.”
And there it is; the confirmation that he needs. She has voiced the words he could not bring himself to say and all at once, his heart and head hurt, he forgets how to breathe, think, and speak. She takes a step closer and is completely in his orbit, his axis change to centre her, nothing else exists anymore. It is only her.
She looks up at him, her eyes taking on the size of the moon and he finds himself falling deeper and deeper under her spell. He was a fool to believe he could ever be over her and that he could ever want to be over her. She was his everything, his entire universe, all of the galaxies combined into one fiery red-headed woman.
“I missed you too.” Is all he can manage to say, but it’s enough. For now.
*
It’s another week until he sees her again but it feels like years.
This time he takes the time to fully appreciate everything about her; her laugh, the way her nose scrunches when he tells a particularly bad joke, the way she always looks so soft when she’s listening to him tell a story.
He’s aware he’s becoming addicted to her and he’s aware that it is only going to end up badly for him but he just doesn’t care anymore. She owns every part of him and he is going to tell her, he is, just as soon as Hans Westergaard disappears. Kristoff hadn’t intended on meeting the man who had stolen Anna away, it had happened by chance.
And by chance, he means it was cleverly orchestrated so he could get a true understanding of why Anna had returned. He had purposefully left something in her purse, something which he couldn’t possibly cope without and so he had to go to the castle and collect it back. And once he was there, well it would have been rude of Anna to turn him away without a tour of the castle and something to eat. He was aware he wasn’t being entirely truthful with her but he needed to meet Hans, he had to see them together, know that she had made the best choice for her. He could see it, Hans was charming and polite and handsome and it’s not difficult to see why you would- and could- fall for a man like that. And yet there is something off about him, something that doesn’t sit well with Kristoff. He doesn’t seem to get Anna the way that you would expect your soul mate to get you. He doesn’t laugh at her silly jokes or understand why she has befriended the local iceman and his reindeer. He isn’t keen on Kristoff as well, something which pleases him greatly.
Anna walks him to the castle gate, just as the sun sets and there is still so much he wants to say and it’s all on the tip of his tongue, when Hans comes dashing out and steals their moment.
“Darling, you forgot this for Kristoff. I would be devastated if he wasn’t around on our special day.” He kisses her then, fully on the mouth, a small gasp escapes her lips and Kristoff can’t bear this. Envy courses through his veins and he isn’t a violent man but he imagines breaking Hans’ nose with a swift punch. Their kiss seems to last a decade and he’s just about to turn around and leave when Hans drops Anna and takes his leave.
“Well, that was nice. What did he bring anyway?”
Anna doesn’t look at him, only the envelope which is now in her hands, and he feels all the air escape his body. It’s a heavy set envelope and he can see the wax seal on the back and he knows exactly what this is and he feels as though he’s going to be sick but this is what she wants and he has to be happy for her.
“I get married next week. Tuesday to be exact. Hans wants to be married before the first snowfall; he wasn’t a particular fan of the last one and so he wants to back in the Southern Isles so we can start sorting out Arendelle’s affairs from there before we return next spring. I’ve heard the Southern Isles is beautiful during the winter time so I’m quite excited to see it. Although I suppose I won’t get to see too much of it seeing as I’ll be busy being married and what not...” She trails off, still not daring to look at Kristoff.
“Next week? You’re leaving next week... but what about Arendelle?” What about me? “Your kingdom needs you!”
She scoffs “Oh please, Arendelle will be fine. In case you’ve forgotten, Elsa is queen not me. And besides we’ll be back here next year, I’ll only be gone for 6 months...” She finally looks at him and his heart breaks all over again.
“6 months? You’ll be gone for 6 months? Right...” Yeah, he can go six months without seeing her face, without hearing her laugh, without the gentle brushes of her fingers against his skin... yeah, he’ll be fine. He focuses back in on her and realises she has been talking this entire time and he hates himself for not being there in the moment. “Sorry, what did you say?”
She gives a sad smile “We’ll be back in 6 months and then I’ll only be here for a month or so and its then back to the Southern Isles I guess. Hans is less keen on staying here now that he knows that Elsa intends to remain as Queen.” She shrugs slightly, her smile now non existent.
“Wait, you’re not going to be here at all? Anna, you can’t leave! You can’t!”
“Kristoff, I have nothing keeping me here. Well apart from Elsa, obviously, but she’s queen now and so she’s busy. And I’ll be able to keep in touch with her via letters and royal meetings so it’s pretty much going to be how it always was except this time, I know she’s happy. And she knows I’m... happy.” Her voice cracks on the last word, and he can see the tears slowly forming in the corner of her eyes. “Its better this way. Anyway, this is an invitation to the wedding; it’s for you and Sven, so if you can come that’ll be amazing, but I completely understand if you can’t. Or don’t want too.”
She doesn’t give him an opportunity to reply, just takes another step closer and goes on her tip-toes so she can press a kiss to his cheek. Her lips burn his skin and he would do anything to place his hands on her waist and drink her in forever. But as soon as her lips are there, they’re gone and he’s left outside the castle gates; once again, wishing he could follow her wherever she goes.
*
He had absolutely no intention of even being in Arendelle, let alone go to the wedding and yet here he was, stood outside her dressing room, heart pounding in his chest. Sven had pushed and pushed him to go and despite arguing his case thoroughly, he had lost. He hated losing.
He knocks ever so quietly as not to disturb the peace and he’s about to knock again when a small voice calls out ‘Come in’ and its now or never. He walks in and he can’t stop his mouth from falling open.
Anna is stood in front of him in a white dress, her hair tied up into a delicate bun. She’s just adjusting her veil when Kristoff walks in and her face breaks out into a smile, lighting up the entire room. She is perfect in every way and he knows now he can never possibly let her go.
He goes to speak when Elsa walks into the room, and he can’t help but admit how beautiful she looks as well. Dressed in a sparkly blue dress, with a crown placed upon her head, she looks every bit the Queen and Kristoff has an overwhelming desire to bend down and bow. But he won’t; not yet anyway.
“Oh, Kristoff! What a pleasant surprise, I didn’t expect to see you here.” Elsa addresses him personally, her tone warm but her eyes cold. “Is there any particular reason you’re in the Princesses dressing room, on her wedding day?”
He swallows the lump rising in his throat and coughs before addressing her. “I have a gift for the Princess, your majesty. I wanted to gift it to her before I left Arendelle.”
“You’re... you’re leaving?” Anna’s tiny voice fills the room and he allows himself to look at her. She has moved across the room and is now standing directly in front of him, so the only thing he can see is her.
“Yes, my family needs me in the mountains so I’m to return there for the foreseeable future.”
They look at one another and it doesn’t matter that this is her wedding day; he couldn’t and wouldn’t stop loving her even if it meant letting her go.
A small cough breaks his reverie and he tears his gaze away from Anna to look at Elsa, whose eyes have now softened.
“Well Kristoff, I shall leave you and Anna to it. Please bear in mind the wedding begins in twenty minutes.” She walks towards the door, grabbing her sisters’ hand as she passes and he misses the words she mouths to Anna. She’s at the door when she turns and addresses him once more. “Oh and one more thing Kristoff. Thank you, for what you did for Anna and me during the unexpected winter. I don’t know what we would have done without you.” She smiles at him and gives a slight nod of the head and seconds later she has gone, leaving him alone with the woman of his dreams.
It takes him a moment or two to look back at Anna and when he does he can barely breathe. They are standing chest to chest; well chest to head as he is at least a foot taller than her and she is looking up at him, like he is the only person that exists.
“You have a gift for me?” She whispers, her sweet breath caressing his face. He shudders slightly at the sound of her voice and he will not kiss her, he won’t. He takes a step back and reaches into his pocket, pulling out a small jewellery box and hands it to her. Her fingers brush gently against his and he shudders once again, all the blood draining from his body and rushing to his head.
Anna opens the box and gasps. “Oh Kristoff, it’s beautiful. Wherever did you get it?”
“Grandpappie, kind of. He gifted me the gems and I... well I made it.” He can feel the blush spread to his cheeks and he lifts a hand to rub the back of his neck in embarrassment. She gives him the biggest smile he has ever seen and he can feel the smile spreading across his own face. “I wanted you to have a piece of the mountains and a reminder of, um, how we met. Hence the snowflake.”
“It’s wonderful, thank you. I want to wear it now.” She turns towards the mirror and removes the necklace she is currently wearing. He watches her struggle with the clasp for a few seconds and moves hesitantly towards her.
“May I?”
She nods and he takes the necklace from her grasp, bringing it around her neck and fastening it with ease. He allows himself to linger a few extra seconds, taking in the slenderness of her neck, wondering how it would feel under his lips. His fingers graze the back, as he moves a few wispy bits of hair and he feels her tremble beneath his touch. He looks at the two of them in the mirror and allows himself a small smile; they really do look wonderful together.
“Kristoff?”
“Yes Anna?”
“I can’t marry Hans.”
*
He isn’t sure how long has passed but he’s certain they’re running out of time.
He’s still stood by the mirror but Anna is no longer in front of him. She is currently wringing her hands together and pacing the room. He wants to say something, anything but it’s like he has forgotten every word he’s ever learnt. The only words he knows are ”I can’t marry Hans.”
She finally stops pacing and rubs her hands down her face. “I can’t do it, I won’t do it. Arendelle doesn’t need the Southern Isles and I sure as hell don’t need Hans.” She sounds more confident now. “It’ll be fine. I’ll just go out there and tell them and if it means that I’ve ruined everything then so be it. I’ll run away to the mountains, I’ve done it once before. I can do it again.” She’s rambling now and he knows she won’t stop till he says something but he has a lump in his throat that just won’t go away. “And who knows, maybe he’ll be fine with it. Maybe he’ll agree. Maybe he’ll laugh and be like ‘thank goodness’. Or you know, maybe he’ll threaten me with death...”
That snaps him out of his thoughts and he forces himself to speak. “Anna, I’d never let him hurt you. Never. But why don’t you want to marry him? I thought he was your true love?”
“He’s not my true love Kristoff. I know that much.”
“But the winter went away, the sun came back. I thought an act of true love could only fix it?”
She sighs and buries her hands in her face, before finding a seat. She remains like that for a few moments before looking back at him.
“I didn’t tell you this because I didn’t think I’d ever see you again. Then when I saw you and Sven in the city, I couldn’t bring myself to tell you the truth. I didn’t want you to think less of me...” She looks down towards her hands in her lap.
He strides across the room and bends down in front of her. He takes her hands in one of his, and tilts her head with the other so he can look at her directly.
“Anna, I would never think less of you. Tell me what happened.”
“Well I returned to the castle and found Hans. I told him that Elsa had frozen my heart and that only an act of true love could fix it. He suggested the kiss and so he sat me down and we kissed.” She blushes at that point and looks away. “But it didn’t work. I still had a frozen heart and I was getting weaker by the minute. Hans didn’t think anything of it and declared he was going to find Elsa so he could fix it. I was on my own for ages, Kristoff, just getting colder and colder when I had an idea. So I ventured back outside, into the oncoming storm and found myself on the frozen sea. I was wandering further and further away from the castle when I saw Weselton brandishing a sword. He was going to kill Elsa and I knew I couldn’t let that happen, so I changed course and stood in front of her. Well the effect of having a frozen heart took hold and I ended up becoming a statue.
“I wasn’t expecting it but Elsa’s love for me, unfroze me. I guess after all those years apart and thinking she hated me, I was wrong. She really did love me. So, yeah, she realised what she had to do to fix the winter, did it and there was no reason for me not to marry Hans.”
Kristoff couldn’t breathe, it hadn’t worked. Which meant someone out there could be her true love, could it be him? Would she allow it to be him?
“What was your idea?”
“Hmm?” She looks confused and nervously tucks a stray bit of hair behind her ear.
“You said you had an idea, whilst you were getting colder waiting for Hans to return. What was it?”
“Oh.” She blushes now and it is the most wonderful thing he has seen. Her cheeks look fuller and all of her freckles stand out. “I thought... um... well... I thought I would look for you.”
“Me?”
They look at each other and if he thought he knew anything of love before he was wrong. The look in her eyes lets him know that this, this was love and that he wasn’t being silly when he knew she loved him back. He just needed to hear it now, just needed to voice it.
“Yes. I thought maybe you would have an idea of how to fix it. Seeing as my kiss with Hans didn’t work. I thought maybe...” She breaks off and giggles nervously. She is so Anna and she’s perfect and she’s beginning to lean closer towards him and he can’t help but lean towards her and they’re so close, the lips almost meet...
And then a harsh laugh is heard behind him.
*
He turns around slowly, unable to hide the disappointment which flashes across his face and he sees Hans stood there, looking particularly angry, a hand hovering over his sword.
“Well, well, well, what do we have here? Oh Anna, I expected so much better from you. I really did.” Hans’ voice is a snarl, and he moves menacingly towards the two of them. They both scramble to their feet, and Kristoff puts a protective arm around Anna.
“Hans, this isn’t what it looks like. I was just saying goodbye to Anna, that’s all.”
“Oh do be quiet Kristoff. I know exactly what’s going on here. Do you think I’m stupid? Do you think I haven’t noticed the longing looks the two of you give one another when you think you’re the only one around? Do you think I didn’t notice that my kiss didn’t work Anna? That you then went out into the storm in search of him?”
Anna peeks out from behind Kristoff and stands beside him, taking his hand. He tries to ignore the way his pulse quickens at this small gesture and squeezes her hand in support.
“Get over it Hans, I don’t love you and I don’t want to marry you. There is only person in this room I want to be with and as I’ve just said, it isn’t you.” Anna stands proudly and stares her now ex-fiancée down.
“I should have made sure you died in that room.” Hans raises his sword above his head and Kristoff is sure this is how he dies, Anna’s small hand in his and although he never got to tell her how he feels, he knows she knows and that’s all that matters really...
But there’s no crushing blow, no blood splatter; just the sound of the door crashing open and Hans being slammed against the wall, in an icy blast. Elsa is stood in the doorway, flanked by guards, hands trembling.
“Anna, Kristoff, are you both okay?” She asks them, never taking her eyes of Hans.
“We’re fine Elsa, we’re fine. Thank you.” Anna speaks before he gets the chance and she cuddles closer to his side.
“Well Prince Hans, I imagine this isn’t quite how you pictured your wedding day going. As Queen of Arendelle, I banish you from ever returning. You shall be sent back to the Southern Isles and I will personally let your brothers know of your misdoings.” She turns away from him to address her guards. “Take him away and send him on the next boat home, I want him as far away from Anna as possible.” She turns to face him once more and leans close. “If you ever try and return to hurt her again, I will personally make sure that you never see the light of day again. Goodbye Prince Hans” She stands aside so the guards can escort him out and then it’s just the three of them.
Elsa finally looks at them and rushes over to hug Anna. “Oh I was so worried about you. Thank god I got here when I did. You sure you’re okay?” She places both of her hands on the side of her sisters’ face.
“Elsa I’m fine, thanks to you. I can’t believe I was due to marry him!”
“Well there’s no need to worry about that now, he will never be able to hurt you again. Come on, let’s get you home. It’s time to put this day behind us.” Elsa takes her hand and goes to lead her out of the room, stopping once she realises Kristoff is still stood there. “You too Kristoff, you’re coming with us surely?”
He can barely contain the grin that breaks out across his face.
It’s not till much later, when they’re sat together on her sofa that he realises that she hasn’t let go of his hand since she took it earlier.
*
It’s been two weeks and he is still yet to kiss her.
He keeps missing his opportunity, cursing Hans at every chance he gets, but he knows when the perfect moment arrives, it’ll be the most wonderful feeling in the world.
He hasn’t left her side since Elsa stopped Hans, except to go home and sleep, but he’s back in her life before they get a chance to miss one another. He can’t quite believe his luck, that Anna chose him over everyone else and every morning he thanks his lucky stars that he gets to love her.
He’s yet to tell her that as well but he knows, soon he will.
“Kristoff?”
“Yes?”
“Are you coming? I’ve got something to show you!” Anna has a huge grin on her face and is bouncing on the balls of her feet, and he knows that today is the day. Today he will kiss her and tell her everything he is feeling in that one simple act.
“Yeah, I’m coming.” He says as she exits the room, a bundle of nervous energy.
*
Kristoff was used to being alone and he was fine with that.
And then Anna came into his life and changed his entire viewpoint of what it meant to be alone.
Because even when he was, he knew she was out there somewhere, being the best thing to happen to him and so he would never be alone again.