Chapter Text
Armitage woke up with a blinding headache as his comlink was pinged relentlessly. He groaned and struggled to sit up, hissing loudly as the motion detectors sensed his movements and brought the lights to one hundred percent.
Disoriented, he leaned over to grab his comlink and then retreated under the soft comforter, blinking rapidly in the dimmed lighting and rubbing his fingers against his aching temple.
Seeing that he was being pinged by Lieutenant Mitaka, Armitage engaged the holoprojecter and squinted at the tiny projection of his right hand man.
“Report, Lieutenant.”
His voice was hoarse and his throat felt like he had swallowed all the sands on Jakku. Mitaka paused at the sight of his Grand Marshal, blinking his big brown eyes owlishly. Cursing under his breath, Armitage disabled the view on his side and repeated his order, his voice hard and cold.
Mitaka subconsciously snapped into a salute and stammered,
“Y-yes, Grand Marshal, sir! Reporting that your presence is urgently needed in Meeting Room Alpha.”
Armitage frowned, his eyes starting to ache from the light of the holo.
“Meeting Room Alpha? What is the situation, Lieutenant?”
Mitaka shifted his eyes to the side, looking uncomfortable but his upright posture didn’t waver. Armitage could tell he was fighting the urge to fidget. Mitaka always came across as timid and awkward but given a mission he was passionate about, the lieutenant was ruthless and efficient.
More than once Armitage had seen him use his unassuming presence and weak mannerisms as a ploy, waiting for the enemy to relax their guard before striking. After so many years in the First Order together, Armitage could tell that Mitaka’s discomfort was no ploy.
He sat up, enduring the bright lights as he stumbled his way to the refresher.
“The situation is urgent, sir. As you know, Ravin Klor has been reaching out to the First Order recently, hinting at coming back into the fold.”
Armitage grimaced as he saw his reflection in the refresher mirror. No wonder Mitaka had looked faintly scandalized. His hair was a mess, his lips were still swollen from Ren’s passionate kisses and he could see more than one love bite right under his chin. He didn’t remember being mauled so thoroughly last night.
Shaking his head, Armitage injected his bicep with a mild pain reliever and dragged his mind back to Mitaka.
“Alright, get to the point, Lieutenant.”
Mitaka cleared his throat.
“Right, sir. This morning at 0500, Ravin Klor and two other representatives of their cartel approached the Finalizer, demanding a meeting with you, the Grand Marshal.”
Armitage looked at the time on the holo and sneered. He hurried to dress as he spoke.
“0500? It’s fast approaching 0600! I have been courting the Ravin Cartel for weeks! It’s almost impossible to convince Ravin Klor to meet anyone outside their faction face to face. Why wasn’t I informed?”
“Uh, well, you see, sir...Supreme Leader Ren appeared to welcome them and showed them into Meeting Room Alpha. He blocked any personnel from being present for the meeting but loud yelling and sounds of fighting started about...ten minutes ago. No one but you has the Supreme Leader’s override code. We are unable to open the door and assess the situation.”
Armitage cursed loudly and finished closing the buttons on his greatcoat. There was no time to cover up the love bite on his neck. He raised the collar of his coat, hoping that it would hide the worst of it and rushed out of his quarters.
*
By the time Armitage made it to Meeting Room Alpha, Ren had already opened the door, leaving Ravin Klor and their retinue red faced and shouting as he stalked down the corridor. Stormtrooper guards stood at attention, aiming their blasters at the Cartel, ready and waiting.
Ren’s helmet was missing, his face pale and thunderous as he brushed past Armitage, heading back towards their quarters. He didn’t spare a glance for his Grand Marshal. Armitage hesitated, turning to watch Ren’s black cloak disappear around a sharp corner.
Every part of him was screaming to follow Ren, to scold him for upsetting a potential ally and then to soothe away the wrinkles from his brow.
But the Ravin Cartel was spilling into the corridor, still shouting and reaching subconsciously towards their empty blaster holsters.
Armitage grit his teeth and turned away from Ren’s direction. How typical of Ren to storm in, make a delicate situation untenable and then leave in a huff, forcing Armitage to clean up the mess.
*
It had taken hours to calm down the Ravin Cartel and Armitage was exhausted. The pain reliever had long ceased to be effective and the migraine from this morning was back with a vengeance.
Ren had spent the morning and afternoon in his own quarters, the Stormtroopers stationed at the end of their corridor reporting every hour that he had not emerged. Armitage made his way back to his own quarters with strict instructions for Mitaka to inform him of Ren’s movements.
Thank the stars for Mitaka’s diplomatic instincts and Armitage’s Force enhanced charm. Nothing short of subtle mind manipulation had kept the Cartel from fighting their way off the Finalizer and returning with reinfornments.
Not that the Cartel’s power could even come close to matching the might of the First Order. But the embarrassment of the Supreme Leader being so uncouth to an ally and making them wage an impossible battle would be hard to endure.
With tensions so high, Armitage hadn’t been able to get a clear picture of what had gone on in Meeting Room Alpha. Only that Ren had been attempting small talk while they waited for refreshments and then lost his temper for no reason. He started threatening Ravin Klor and demanding answers that the Cartel simply didn’t have.
All of this drama for wild, unsubstantiated rumors about the return of Darth karking Sidious. How utterly ridiculous.
Armitage paused outside of the door to Ren’s quarters, debating on if he should use his override code and demand answers or give the man time to calm down. The silence in the hall was deafening and Armitage strained his ears to hear anything from beyond the door.
Nothing.
Sighing, Armitage entered his own quarters, throwing his gloves and cap on the desk just past the door. He sank into the desk chair and tapped the terminal to wake it up. Pushing Ren from his mind, Armitage began to work on his endless supply of military reports.
The passing of time was only tracked by the hourly reports that Mitaka relayed to Armitage about Ren’s condition. It became harder and harder for Armitage to concentrate on his work. His rising anxiety was not helped by the increasing pressure from the Force. It felt like the very universe itself was waiting in anticipation of something.
He had tried twice to rouse Ren, paging him through the door lock and then an hour later, pounding his fist against the parasteel door. He could, of course, force a confrontation, override the door and storm inside. But he was reluctant to shatter the newfound peace between them.
His comm pinged right as Armitage was rising from his desk to prepare to rest. Mitaka filled the small screen, his face drawn into an anxious frown.
“Any updates, Lieutenant?”
“Reporting to the Grand Marshal, the Stormtroopers stationed outside the Supreme Leader’s quarters have informed me that he is still refusing meals and berating anyone who tries to disturb him…”
Mitaka shifted, looking uncomfortable. Armitage raised an eyebrow.
“Go on.”
Mitaka cleared his throat.
“The ensign who tried to deliver the Supreme Leader’s last meal said that it sounded like he was…talking to someone. But the bridge computer has no recording of the comm’s being active in his rooms.”
Ignoring the ominous feeling growing in the back of his mind, Armitage frowned,
“I don’t recall giving you permission to monitor the Supreme Leader’s communiques.”
Mitaka scrambled to respond.
“No, Sir- I mean, yes, of course, Sir. I wasn’t eavesdropping! I was merely looking at the generated comms data.”
Armitage suppressed an amused expression.
“Yes, all right, Lieutenant. I’m retiring for the evening. Disturb me only if there is a significant change in the Supreme Leader’s status.”
Mitaka saluted and disconnected. Armitage stared blankly at the screen of his comm, fighting the urge to walk over to the connecting door between his and Ren’s room. He wanted to pound on it until Ren was forced to open it and let Armitage in.
Was Ren talking to himself? Or…was he using the Force to communicate with someone? If that were the case, it would have to be with someone Force Sensitive and there weren’t many in the galaxy that were.
Shaking his head, Armitage decided to face Ren after a few hours of sleep.
*
Armitage woke up how he usually did these days, with his comm being pinged relentlessly. He rolled over and sighed, connecting the comm and disabling the video. Before he could speak, Mitaka’s frantic voice came through.
“Sir, the Supreme Leader has approved his personal aircraft to immediately depart the docking bay.”
Armitage sat up in bed so fast that his head spun.
“What? Nevermind. Lieutenant, do your best to delay the Supreme Leader’s departure until I can make it to the bay.”
“Yes, Sir.”
With rising dread, Armitage donned his coat directly over his lounge wear, thankful that his preference for black clothing made it less obvious his current uniform was far from regulation. The overcoat was so long that it hid most of his trousers and Armitage worked the buttons closed as he stalked down the empty hallway to the elevator. He smoothed down his hair as best he could as the elevator delivered him to the docking bay.
The elevator doors opened to reveal a dead silent bay. Even this late, the docking bay was usually bustling with activity; mechanics, pilots and cleaning crew always rotating shifts to do their tasks.
Every part of the Finalizer was a well oiled machine, even the soldiers. So the silent, deserted docking bay that greeted Armitage as he stepped out of the elevator was an ominous sign.
Armitage reached out through the Force, feeling for any sign of Ren as he made his way to where the Supreme Leader’s TIE Silencer was usually docked. If Ren was haring off into the unknown reaches of space, for whatever insane reason, he would surely take his precious TIE.
Armitage wasn’t the only one Ren had attracted with his erratic behavior. As he approached the TIE, Armitage saw a wall of personnel, their backs to him. They were staring at something, whispering and frowning.
Armitage came to a stop behind them, clearing his throat pointedly. He stood there, impatient, as the soldiers turned, recognized him and then saluted before scattering. But he ignored them, his eyes never leaving the figure that their quick departure revealed.
Ren looked awful; wide eyed, pale and sweaty. He had shed his cloak and helmet, his bloodless face making the long scar over his right eye look more pronounced.
Armitage watched him for a short moment as he lifted various supplies and threw them into the cockpit, the muscles in his arms flexing as he worked. He was obviously in a rush, throwing items haphazardly and gritting his teeth, looking infinitely impatient.
Had Ren planned on leaving just like this? With no word to his Grand Marshal and no care for the precarious position they were in? For Star's sake, every day there were new rumors of Pryde trying to incite rebellion against the First Order’s new leaders. And what of the allies they were trying to court? What would they think when the Supreme Leader went MIA?
Was Ren truly just abandoning the First Order? And for what? On the back of Armitage’s worry and panic came burning anger. How dare he? Moving forward, he barked out,
“Ren!”
Ren startled, pausing his movement of bending over to rummage through a storage bin. He stood slowly, back tense and turned his head to the side, looking back at Armitage over his shoulder. His expression cycled quickly through surprise, reluctance and then determination. His tone was firm as he spoke, fists clenched at his side.
“I don’t have time for this.”
“Excuse me?”
The anger in Armitage’s heart was joined by outrage. Ren turned back towards the TIE, moving as if to jump into the cockpit right then and there and leave Armitage stewing in his impotent rage.
Ren sighed and turned back to face Armitage, one foot still on the mounted step on the side of the TIE. His jaw was tense and he looked like he was grinding his teeth.
“This is important.”
“What could be more important than the First Order?”
Armitage scoffed, hating the indifference in Ren’s face. He obviously remembered nothing from last night or he just didn’t care about their drunken kiss. But worse than the cold rejection was the fact that Ren, the Supreme Leader, was abandoning the First Order without a word to anyone to shoot off into the unknown for Stars knew how long.
And if Ren left like this, he would be leaving Armitage in an even more vulnerable position than he already occupied. Heart pounding, Armitage stepped forward and laid a hand on Ren’s forearm. His touch was gentle, despite the fact that he wanted to throw himself upon Ren, grab him by the collar and demand that he stay.
At the touch, Ren softened, his muscles losing their rigid tension and his expression became less pinched. He reached up and covered Armitage’s hand with one of his own.
Neither of them wore gloves and the touch made Armitage shudder, feeling Ren’s large, warm and calloused palm on his skin. Ren’s eyes flickered down to Armitage’s neck, no doubt taking in the slowly fading love bites that littered his pale skin. Armitage resisted the urge to cover them with his free hand, watching raptly as Ren’s cheeks took on a faint pink color and he subtly swayed forward, eyes growing dark.
But after a silent moment, Ren removed Armitage’s hand from his arm and let go. Armitage’s hand hovered in the air for a moment, his chest squeezing painfully before he hid his tingling palm behind his back. He cleared his throat.
“Please tell me this has nothing to do with the second hand, impossible claim of the return of Emperor Palpatine. Tell me that you aren’t rushing off to abandon the very vulnerable First Order for an unsubstantiated rumor. We have so much to accomplish here, Ren. And our goals are very much time sensitive.”
Ren sighed, his shoulders dropping but his mouth was a firm line, his jaw still set in a determined clench.
“Hux, these rumors, as you say, are important. The return of Palpatine could threaten the balance of the whole galaxy. Isn’t that what we’ve dedicated ourselves to, what we are working to dedicate the First Order to? Balance?”
Hux. Hux. It had been so long since Ren had started to call him Armitage that hearing ‘Hux’ felt like a punch in the gut. Was it a mere slip of the tongue or a deliberate way to create some distance between them? He clenched the hand behind his back into a tight fist, digging his short nails into the flesh of his palm.
“Alright, Ren. You’re right. We should investigate these rumors for validity, send troops on location, if we must. There is no reason that you should leave. You’re the Supreme Leader, for Star’s sake! You have every right to delegate these things.”
He stepped closer, staring into Ren’s dark eyes, feeling the Force swirl around them. He could almost taste the tension in the air.
“You only just stole the throne from Snoke. Don’t leave the seat of power empty like this. Someone will step up and take it.”
Ren sneered, stepping back.
“Of course, Grand Marshal. You’re more than welcome to it. Now if you’ll excuse me-”
Armitage grabbed Ren’s arm again, his nails digging into his forearm. He hissed through clenched teeth,
“That’s not what I meant! I was speaking of Allegiant General Pryde and his ever growing dissident army. The First Order needs you here. I need you here.”
Ren hesitated at the pleading tone in Armitage's voice, letting him step closer. For a moment, Ren looked torn and sad, then he shook his head.
“You don’t understand, Armitage.”
Armitage let out a strained laugh.
“Then explain it to me, Ren. Did you not say that we are partners? That the First Order is ours.”
Ren still looked reluctant to speak but he didn’t shake off Armitage’s grip on his arm. Taking this as encouragement, Armitage pressed forward.
“After your public tantrum with the cartel, I posted ‘trooper guards outside your quarters to alert me of your movements.”
Ren’s eyes narrowed and he opened his mouth as if to speak. Armitage stepped closer, bringing his other hand up to Ren’s chest. Ren’s mouth snapped shut and he swallowed thickly.
This close, Ren radiated heat like a furnace. Armitage wanted to curl his body into Ren’s chest, press his face against his skin and let Ren block out the galaxy. He wanted to hide away from his insecurities and responsibilities. Armitage forced that childish thought away and continued,
“I was worried about you, Ren. You were avoiding me and behaving erratically. They reported that you were speaking with someone in your quarters but the bridge recorded that your comms were idle.”
The muscles under his palm tensed again, as if Ren were preparing for an incoming blow. Ren was pushing him away, leaving him out of something important. Suddenly, Armitage was terrified. He felt as if this moment was salient.
Even while repressing his Force Sensitivity, Armitage could feel the presence of it around them grow thicker, pressing and swirling as if in a panic.
“Please,” Armitage begged, “Stay. Don’t go. I don’t care who you were speaking to. Don’t tell me, if you wish. But, please, don’t push me away. We’re better together, Ren.”
“It was Rey.”
Ren said it suddenly, looking pained. As if the name had been forced from his chest to his throat, clogging his airway until he was forced to expel it, painfully, into the air.
Armitage felt as if his body had been submerged into icy water, as if a cold, frozen dagger had pierced his chest. He’d guessed that Ren had been communicating with someone through the Force.
He speculated that it had been Leia and secretly rejoiced at the prospect. How happy she would be, to have her son at her side once more. And Armitage thought it would be good for Ren as well. One more person to love him, to shine some Light upon him.
“What? The scavenger girl? How long have you…”
Armitage's voice was hollow. His chest felt hollow.
Ren sighed and stepped back, breaking away from Armitage's touch. The loss of his body heat made Armitage shiver. He wanted to wrap his arms around himself but he resisted the urge, standing tall and stiff, biting his tongue against the slew of questions he wanted to ask.
Ren sighed, running a hand through his long hair.
“So much happened while you were gone. One of the things I discovered was a…connection I have to the girl, Rey.”
“A connection?”
Armitage felt as if the tight constriction in his chest was seconds away from twisting his lungs. He felt as if an invisible hand were strangling him, making his chest burn from lack of air.
Ren sighed and looked to the TIE again, his body angled towards Armitage. He looked as if he longed to leave, he looked as if his heart and mind were already across the galaxy, far away from Armitage.
“At first, I suspected Snoke’s manipulation. I thought that he had fabricated a Force Bond to draw Rey and I together for some reason. But even after I killed him, our Bond remained as strong as it ever was. Stronger, even, without Snoke’s darkness in my mind.”
“Force Bond…”
Armitage’s voice was hoarse and he felt lightheaded. Dread infused his hazy, shocked mind and the Force pressed upon his mental shields. As if urging him to drop them. He wanted to reach out and cover Ren’s mouth, he wanted to force the words back down his throat, before they could be said aloud.
“Yes. This far away from each other, it’s hard to identify what kind of bond it is but…I suspect we have a Soul Bond-”
“Soul Bond!”
Armitage’s voice was high and strained. He felt like an idiot, paralyzed before Ren, only able to repeat his soul shattering words.
Ren rolled his eyes, looking impatient at the constant interruptions.
“Yes, Soul Bond. It’s a-”
“I know what a Soul Bond is, Ren!”
Ren frowned.
“You do?”
Armitage laughed, feeling hysterical.
“Of course, you and I-”
Ren cut his hand through the air, looking frustrated and angry.
“This doesn’t matter! We’re wasting time! What matters is that Rey has agreed to meet with me and investigate the rumors of Darth Sidious’ return. I have to go, Hux. I leave the First Order under your capable command and I will be in touch with our progress.”
“Wait, Ren!”
Ren turned to haul himself into the cockpit of the TIE and Armitage reached for him. His hand fell short, his numb fingertips barely brushing the back of Ren’s tunic.
“Ren, listen to me! You and I-”
Ren’s face was blank, impenetrable, his eyes shining with determination.
“I won’t be turned from her, Hux. There is nothing you can do to stop me.”’
He started up the TIE with practiced precision, working the controls to lower the dome and shut out Armitage's increasingly desperate pleas.
The Force pushed even harder against Armitage’s mental shields, urging and swirling around him. Yes, that’s right. He could drop his shields, reveal the true extent of his Force Sensitivity to Ren. It would surely stop him from leaving.
Armitage could picture it clearly, dropping his ever exhausting shields and reaching out his mind to connect with Ren’s. He would feel Armitage’s power, his will, his strength. Ren would feel their Soul Bond, weak and tenuous as it was in this moment and he would stay.
But…would Ren stay?
Armitage didn’t doubt Ren’s power and awareness with the Force. He was much more trained and experienced wielding his powers than Armitage ever would be.
And Ren suspected a Soul Bond existed between him and Rey. Leia had said that a Soul Bond always culminated in the bonded sharing their lives as partners. Most of them romantically.
Was Ren attracted to Rey? What had they discussed through their Force connection? Was Ren always mentally in contact with her?
Armitage felt no pull towards anyone but Ren. Was it possible to have more than one Soul Bond and not have them connected to each other as well? Would the Force naturally provide a way for them to balance themselves and live together in harmony? Or would Ren need to choose one of them?
And why wouldn’t he choose Rey? The people of the Resistance spoke of her in hushed tones, their eyes shining with pride at having her be one of them. Finn and Poe spoke of her kindness and bravery. Leia spoke of Rey’s natural power and strong will.
Rey was pure and good and Light. So young yet so powerful. Truly Ren’s equal.
Armitage was the complete opposite of all that. He was a murderer, a former fascist, more Grey than Light.
And while Ren was those things, too, perhaps he would be better off with Rey. After all, what brought more balance when brought together than complete opposites?
What good would Armitage be to Ren? Their past was nothing but rivalry and hatred. Their present was filled with lies and secrets. What could their future contain but resentment and regret? Those visions…no those foolish dreams of a happy life for them meant nothing. They were merely a conjured fantasy for a pathetic, lonely man.
It was better this way. A clean severing.
Ren would leave, find his fate with Rey and never return. Ren would be happier and Armitage would be left with what he had always deserved; desolation and ruin.
So Armitage stepped away from the TIE, he resisted the urge to throw himself bodily upon it. He repressed the urging of the Force for him to reveal his mind to Ren. Why should he cling to a man who was desperate to leave?
It was better this way.
Ren would have his family and Armitage would have what he always wanted; a real chance at full control of the First Order.
He watched Ren’s TIE disappear out of the bay doors from behind the space shields, the light blue, pulsing energy field making it hard to see clearly. He still watched regardless, imprinting this moment into his mind and tattooing it onto his breaking heart.
Finally, after the bay doors closed and the shields disengaged, Armitage turned to leave. He held his head high as he passed the whispering personnel and ‘Troopers, committing to memory those who sneered at him, looking pleased by the strife between Grand Marshal and Supreme Leader.
In no time at all, these scurrying rats would find their master, telling Allegient General Pryde of the latest weakness in Grand Marshal Hux he could gleefully exploit.
Ren was gone, yes. Perhaps that was a good thing. Without the distraction, Armitage could concentrate on further securing stability within the First Order.
When the dissidents were dealt with and when it was finally clear that Ren would never return, finally, finally there would be no one standing between Armitage and the mantle of Supreme Leader.
It was his purpose to devote the rest of his life to bringing some form of balance to the galaxy. Armitage didn’t need Ren by his side to complete his destiny. He would always have the memory of last night, that one, searing kiss to remember the foolish days his heart beat for a man that could never be his.