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There is blood everywhere. On her clothes, on her hands, her face and in her hair. She is crying, sobs tearing her throat apart. She is watching her family die over, and over, and over again. She is frozen in her spot, wide teary eyes just watching the scene unfold before her. Her mind is screaming at her to move, to do something but her body is still not moving.
"Look what you did," a voice whispered to her. "this massacre is all your fault." the voice laughed.
The girl shook her head frantically.
"This is not real, it's all in your head." she squeezed her eyes shut.
"Oh, but darling, if course this is real," the girl wanted to scream but everything in her hurt. "this is all your fault!" the voice sing song.
The raven haired girl wakes up, tears streaming down her face and her body is heavily sweating. Her throat feels dry and she cannot stop crying for a solid five minutes.
It felt so real that she is not sure if it were false or not. She doesn't understand why she suddenly had this nightmare.
Last night was the monthly family night at Wayne Manor, so Dick and Jason stayed the night as always for family night. This time it was movie night, and after some bickering between the siblings, *cough* Tim and Damian *cough*, it was settled on a sci-fi movie. Y/N couldn't care less what movie is going to be played, all she cares about is being with her dysfunctional family. She cherishes the moment she is with them.
As simple as the moment is, like doing mundane things, watching a movie or playing board games. Due to her family nightly activities, she is always beyond terrified that one day, she'd have to come home to one of her brothers or her dad being dead.
She was happily sandwiched between her oldest brother and her youngest brother. Tim was somewhere on the floor and Jason was comfortably seated on the armchair opposite of Bruce.
Unfortunately, Alfred was visiting a relative back in England, so he was not there to participate in family night this month.
Y/N was a little bit upset, but she was happy that Alfred was taking some time to himself. Living at Wayne Manor is not an easy task.
At the end, of the movie, the young girl called it a night and went to bed. She remembers falling asleep as soon as her head touched the pillow. She also vaguely remembers her dad coming in her room to tuck her in somewhere around midnight.
Now, here she is, hair looking like a mess, eyes red and puffy, still filled with tears. She sits on the side of her bed and lets out a long breath. Going to her bathroom to freshen up, she is suddenly panicking. What if all that really happened? What if her siblings and her dad are six feet under?
Opening her door, she sticks her head out to look for any danger. When she is satisfied enough, she walks out and head straight for the room opposite.
She doesn't bother knocking, she knows her brother is still on his damned laptop, looking through a case.
The room is only illuminated by a small lamp on the bedside of Tim's bed. To no surprise, Tim is still seated at his desk on his laptop. He is slightly snoring though, which indicated her that her brother once again fell asleep at his desk.
She rolls her eyes, but she is a bit more reassured that one of her brother is still alive. She lets out a small breath and moves towards Tim.
She lightly shakes him.
"Timmy, go to your bed," she said softly. "you'll be more comfortable."
Tim opens one of his eyes and closes it as soon as it opened.
"Y/N?" he asks, head still clouded with sleep. "What are you doin'?" he speaks sluredly.
If he were more awake, he would have noticed the puffy and red eyes of his sister. She helps him get to his bed and tucks him in, just like she used to do when he was younger.
"Just checking up on you," she kisses his forehead. "goodnight Timmy."
A small smile tugs at her brother's lips and he gave a small "goodnight" and just like that he was out like a light.
She leaves the room and heads to her youngest brother's room. This one can be a little tricky. She knows Damian is a light sleeper, well all of them are light sleepers, but Damian is a light sleeper at another level.
She knocks this time, she doesn't want to have a sword to her throat as soon as she opens the door.
"Damian, it's me," she whispers. "don't pull the sword out, don't pull the sword out." she prays to herself.
To her surprise, Damian is sitting in his bed, rubbing his eyes.
"Sister, do you know what time it is?" he asks, grumpily.
Y/N smiles at him softly.
"I'm sorry Dami," she says. "I'm just checking up on you." she adds.
Damian frowns and looks at the state of his sister.
"She's been crying, why?" he asks himself.
He hesitates at first. He is not good with emotions, but he is learning. Y/N made sure he was learning how to deal with them when there is too much to feel at once.
He figures he can ask what is wrong with her out of politeness. He does not want to admit that it is really because he is worried something happened to his sister.
"Are you alright?" he asks.
She looks surprised by his question. Of course she's not alright. But this is Damian, a ten-year-old boy, who already saw how shitty the world can be.
"Yes," she lies, she knows he knows she is lying. "I'm glad you're alive." she then says.
This time, Damian is surprised. "Glad you're alive?" he frowns. "What a weird thing to say."
"hm, I'm glad you're alive too." he says.
He watches how brightly she smiles. Even in a poorly lighted room, her smile brightens it. A warm feeling swarms in Damian's tiny body.
Y/N walks over to Damian and slowly tucks him back in bed.
"Are you sure you are alright?" he asks again.
"Yes," she still lies. "go back to sleep, goodnight Dami." she kisses his forehead and exits the room.
Two out of four brothers are alive and well. She heads to Dick's room now. She knows Dick is the biggest sleeper between her and her brothers.
She still knocks twice and when all she hears is nothing, she panics a little.
She enters the room and checks for any danger. She then looks over to Dick's bed and here he is. Sprawled all over the bed snoring like a chainsaw. She wonders how she did not hear anything when she was standing outside his door.
She walks over to his side of the bed and fixes the blanket over Dick's shoulders. She smiles when she hears his content sigh. Dick may be the oldest but he is still a giant child.
She kisses his forehead, just like she did with her other brothers and heads to Jason's room, heart a little more calm than half an hour ago.
She figures Jason is sleeping and enters without knocking, just like she did with Dick. She does not hear Jason's breathing and for a second her heart skips a beat.
Jason is sleeping on his belly, a hand tucked under his pillow and he is not breathing. Y/N panics and makes her way hurriedly to Jason.
Just as she is reaching over to check his pulse on his throat, he snatches her wrist and the barrel of his gun is pressed underneath her jaw.
She lets out a gasp and Jason as soon as he recognizes the sound as his sister's gasp, drops the gun to the other side of his bed and snaps his eyes open.
"Holy shit, Y/N, I could have killed you!" he hisses. "I'm sorry, are you alright?" he asks, worried.
She lets out a strangle laugh.
"Yes, I'm fine, I should have seen it coming." she jokes.
Jason smiles but his smile drops when he sees the way her eyes are still a reddish color and puffy as hell.
"What happened? Why are you crying?"
Contrary to popular belief, Jason can be a mother hen when it comes to his siblings. I mean, yes Dick is definitely the mom friend, but Jason? Oh, Jason is the definition of mother hen.
"Nothing, I just had a nightmmph-" she does not have the time to end her sentence that Jason is pulling her in a bone crushing hug.
"Oh my god, are you alright? Do you need something? Do you-"
She stops the embrace and smiles at Jason.
"I'm fine Jay," she says. "I had to check up on all of you." she masks her pained face with a small cough.
Jason's face soften even more than a few seconds ago and he makes his sister sits with him on his bed.
"Do you want to talk about it?" he asks, softly.
She shakes her head 'no' immediately, eyes going wide and mouth open.
"Okay, okay," he says quickly when he sees her reaction. "wait, you checked on Replacement, Dickhead and Demon Spawn?" he asks, confused.
She rolls her eyes at her brothers' nicknames and she nods her head ; she suddenly hugs Jason. A few tears escapes her eyes and after a few minutes of silent, she spokes.
"You were all dead Jay," his heart broke. "and I stood there, watching you get murder and it was all my fault." her voice breaks at the end.
Jason tightens his grip on his little sister. He is feeling guilty for the pain he causes his sister. Every night she monitors them in the Batcave.
"I'm sorry," he says. "I'm sorry, Y/N/N." he kisses the crown of her head.
"'S alright," she rubs her eyes. "I'm okay now." she reassures him with a small smile.
Jason nods his head and lets the girl pulls herself out of his grasp.
"I have to check up on Bruce," she says. "Just to be sure." she adds.
Jason smiles and nods again.
"Alright, if you want to spend the night in here, you are welcoming anytime Y/N/N." he says, grabbing her hand and squeezing it.
She smiles softly and nods her head.
"Thank you Jay," she kisses his cheek. "Goodnight. Love you." she says as she exits the room.
She lets out a breath, closes her eyes and rests her head against the door.
She didn't heard the soft steps on the end of the hall, so when a voice spoke, she jumps back a little.
"What on Earth are you doing up?" she recognizes her father voice and lets out a shaky laugh.
She turns towards him and quickly walks in her father's arms. Bruce is not expecting the sudden force that she tackles him with.
He frowns and embraces his daughter back. He notices she lightly shakes and his entire being goes into dad mode.
"What happened, sweetheart? Why are you crying?" he asks, whispering because they are still in the corridor.
Seeing as Y/N is not calming down, Bruce pulls her in her room and sits with her on her bed, still hugging her close to his chest.
He runs a soothing hand up and down her back. After a few minutes, she lets out a long shaky breath and wipes her tears.
"Sorry." she mutters.
"Are you ready to explain to me why you are crying in the middle of the night?" he asks.
She winces and sights.
"I had a nightmare," she says, shyly. "and not a small nightmare. A really really bad nightmare."
Bruce relaxes. He can deals with nightmares. He's been dealing with them for years.
"Do you want to talk about it?"
He sees her hesitates but she lets out a sigh and faces him.
"Y-you and the boys, you-" her breath hitches in her throat. "there was blood everywhere Dad." her eyes fills with tears once again.
Bruce's heart breaks and he embraces his daughter again. He had the same nightmare almost every night. One of his kids dying and he was standing, powerless.
"You were all d-dead. A-and it was m-my fault." she sobs against her dad's chest.
"It was just a nightmare, Y/N/N, we're alright."
The sobs quiets down and soon Y/N is sleeping in Bruce's arms. Bruce smiles at the sight, it brought him back to when the young girl was a four-year and she would always fall asleep on the couch, and Bruce had to carry the small child to her bedroom.
He picks up the girl and gently lays her down on her bed, tucking her in. He kisses her forehead and goes up to leave. A hand catches his wrist and he is stopped in his tracks.
"Will you stay with me? Please, Dad?" she asks, like a four-year-old.
He smiles and sits on the floor, near the bedhead. She slowly takes one of Bruce's hands and squeezes it, closing her eyes.
"Thank you, love you." the last of her sentence is slurred as she falls asleep, knowing her dad would keep the nightmare at bay.