Chapter Text
Zoley smiled and continued, “Well, my story, Nia. And if you want to hear it to the end, you will have to stop distracting me with your hedonistic tendencies..”, said Zoley the next morning as they were sitting comfortably on the couch in the shop. Niaphael sitting on the couch and with Zoley leaned against him and almost in his lap.
Niaphael spluttered, “MY hedonistic tendencies? What about you and what we did in the bathroom - even if our bathroom temporarily looked more like the baths in Rome. As far as I remember, you were the one who wasn’t satisfied after the first 4 times, my dear.”
“Well - how can you blame me when you were walking around almost naked and looking so delicious, Nia? And you just had to drop your towel and bend over so I could see everything after the first two rounds. How can you blame a poor demon, when an angel is so good at tempting?”
Niaphael smirked, but did try to hide it and Zoley had turned his head and saw it and pointed his finger at the angel, “You did it on purpose.”
Niaphael gave Zoley a hug and kissed the top of his head, “Well - how can you blame me when you still are ‘sex incarnated’ walking on two legs. Everything about you is sex - and still is. Your face - your hair - and I love that it is so long - your legs that continue forever and just the way you walk. How can you blame me from wanting you all the time - when we first were allowed? I had tampered down my love and I’ll have to admit ‘my lust’ too - for such a long time. We still have some things to catch up on in my opinion.”
Zoley turned and smiled and gave Niaphael a kiss and said, “Well - we have had a chance to catch up since 1990 - that is more than 21 years...”
“And we are behind with about 6000 years. So we still lack a lot of sex in my opinion...”, interrupted Niaphael.
Zoley turned his head, “Now?”
Niaphael smiled, “Maybe later, my love. I would like to hear your story. That is... unless?”
“Na...I am good for now. I wouldn’t mind waiting a few hours. So...my story. It is not going to be in a chronological order. More like after topics. So...Jesus and his brothers would often pop in and ask questions and eat my dates - or steal them. Jesus more often than James and Joses and Judas and Simon. Talking - that is - not stealing. And he was a bit different from his brothers. Not that I could sense anything divine about him - it came later - but he was more curious and more thoughtful. And maybe it was just because he was the eldest. I don’t know.”
Zoley lifted his hand and turned it around and looked at it, a bit lost in thought, “This happened when Jesus was about 9 years old, I think. He came to me with a puppy which had been hit by a wagon. You see...Josef was a carpenter and sometimes he would get injured. It could be dangerous back then, without the knowledge about bacteria and stuff - and he would come to me, because I had built a reputation not only with my pots, but with my help for pregnant women and babies - and for treating wounds. I had to be careful - it was so easy to be accused of witchcraft back then. But I always told that ‘it was something my grandmother had taught me in my country long time ago’ and ‘everybody can do what I do’ and as it turned out that they could, no one ever thought about accusing me of anything. More so because I had Josef’s and Mary’s family supporting me.”
Zoley smiled and had put his hand down and into Niaphael’s again, “... So I would treat wounds with boiled and cooled down water, vinegar, clean boiled pieces of cloth - with only a tiny amount of demonic miracle. And with honey and that stuff bees make - propolis. And I even found a way of stitching wounds together with thread. I managed to make wounds, which would have lead to a catastrophe, to be only something that scarred.”
He touched his own hand, near the base of his thumb, “Josef had a big scar here - but it didn’t affect his use of his hand.”
Zoley smiled and continued, “Even Jesus had got a nasty wound on his hand after he had tried to use some of Josef’s tools, and it had healed nicely, only leaving a very small scar - so Jesus thought highly of my abilities....”
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Jesus looked at Lilith with pleading eyes holding the injured little dog in his arms, “Can’t you do something, Aunt Lilith?”
Lilith rose and took the bundle out if Jesus’ hands and placed the injured little dog carefully on her bed. Then she barely touched the dog, but moved her hands over it - and took some of the pain away.
Then she looked at Jesus, “I am afraid it is too injured - that little thing. It will die...I am sorry.”
Jesus sat down beside her and reached out his hand and tried to move them, like she had done, “I don’t feel anything.”
She smiled, “You don’t have to feel - just watch. Look - it tells you by the way the eyes look and the way it breathes, that it is in pain. Then you can hear by the way it breathes that there is something wrong inside. And then you notice that it only moves its front paws - and not its hind paws - and then you can see and smell that it has peed and shit too. That tells me that the back is broken.”
Jesus looked at her and the dog licked his hand, “And we can’t do anything?”
“We can - we can be here. Make sure it is not alone. Show that we wish no harm to it and keep it company for a while. We can put it on something soft like my bed - it is not alone, it is not lying out in the dirt of the road, left to die alone. That is more than many people have, you know.”
Jesus nodded and they sat there until the dog died silently - helped a bit by Lilith taking the pain away and she made sure that it died a little bit faster.
When the dog had died, Jesus looked at her and asked, “Why do we have to die? It is not fair! Like Miriam’s little baby - it was not fair!”
Lilith took the dog and placed it on the floor, “We will bury it later, so the flies will not lay their eggs in it - or the rats eat it. And that brings me to the reason, why things have to die. Come here..” and she sat down on the bed again and padded the place beside her - and Jesus sat down and took her arm and placed it around his shoulders, “I am not too old for a hug.”, he told her and she gave him a hug and explained, “Could you imagine that the chicken or the goat or the sheep - or for that matter the wheat or the dates, they would stay alive as you ate it? And it would assemble again after you had....hm.....delivered it? And how would you then get the energy that you need from the food, if it can’t be made into the tiny bits that your body needs?”
Jesus frowned and then he nodded, “It makes sense - food-animals and food-plants. I get that. But why humans? Why did Miriam’s little boy have to die? We are not food, when we are humans. We are closer to God. But why does He then make us imperfect or wrong or makes us getting old and crazy like old Simon?”
Lilith sat for a few moments and then she tried to explain, “You do remember the tiny clay animals you made, when we lived in Egypt?”
Jesus nodded and Lilith continued, “Would you say that you didn’t try to make them perfect?”
“No...I tried my best..”
“And yet - even if you did that, then sometimes there were small flaws and failures, like in my pots sometimes, which made them break at some point. Sometimes when they were burned the first time or maybe when they were burned the second time - got their glazing on.”
Jesus frowned again and shook his head, “No...I did my best and failed sometimes. But your pots with flaws and failures - you make them on purpose. A small dent here and a wrong colour of glazing. Because then the poor people can afford your good pottery as well. I have heard you say - as you pointed at your pile of ‘broken pots’ or ‘my mistake pots’ and tell the poor people, “You can take that mistake and maybe use it...you can give me an egg for it.”
Lilith looked at Jesus - and he was right - she did that on purpose. She smiled, “You’ve got me there....well back to your small animals, if you don’t mind. They were sometimes like your broken strap on your new sandals..”
And she pointed at Jesus’ feet, where a new pair of sandals was visible, “The strap broke after only two days and of course the sandal maker replaced it. That strap had had a hidden fault - just like some of your clay animals had. Sometimes the faults in humans are very visible, like by the beggars at the temples. No eyes or deformed hands and feet. Or they are more hidden and will only show after some time. Sometimes it is in people’s minds - the flaws - and they are just wrong inside, somehow. Like some of your clay animals that would break immediately or after a few days. And then I could always show you the little bubble of air which had been trapped inside the clay and made it burst. Or a tiny little stone, which made the clay brittle.”
Jesus nodded and Lilith continued, “God is busy and only gave the possibility of life - and just like the king in a country does not know what every ant in his kingdom is doing, then God can’t keep an eye on every tiny little detail. And so many things have to be in place, so people can survive - so animals can survive. Sometimes there are flaws and failures - and sometimes they just sum up over time. Like sandals being worn out - or houses that need repair - a new roof or new clay on the walls. It is like that with humans. And small failures summing up - that is ‘ageing’ - and sometimes the ageing is not just the body, but the mind too, like old Simon, who was a good and hardworking man once and who now is ‘the best baker’ and ‘the best carpenter’ and ‘the best weaver’ and ‘the best sandal maker’ in the whole world - at least inside his own head.”
Jesus nodded and said, “And because he was once a good man, they now accept his yelling and his hitting them and his anger?”
Lilith nodded and continued, “That is why everybody in the village treats him nicely, because of what he once was. But death will be a blessing to him, as he will grow more and more ill. Remember old Hannah?”
“The old lady who almost couldn’t see and hear anymore. She died about a year after we returned from Egypt, right?
“She did and death was a blessing for her to, as it sometimes is. Miriam’s baby would not have had a good life. But we are not the ones to decide. Sometimes people with big flaws inside or outside - they can have good lives, even if we can’t see it right now.”
Jesus frowned and then he looked at her, “Then how can we humans decide that it is fine to kill people?”
“What do you mean, Jesus?”
“Last year, when we were in Jerusalem, as we are almost every year, I saw...”
And Lilith remembered what had moved Jesus so much, “You saw the crucified men..”
“Yes! And when I asked why they’d have to suffer so much - and I understand that death would be a blessing for them too - I was told they were criminals, murderers and cruel people, who only got what they deserved. But those, who crucified them - they made themselves into murderers too, didn’t they? They decided that those men deserved to die in a very cruel and agonizing way.”
“I am not sure if stoning is a more ‘gentle’ way to kill people, as the Jewish law dictates it - but let us just leave that for now. There is a difference - even if is not big - between what a single person can decide and what a whole government can decide. Sometimes a government will have to do something to maintain law and order - even if an individual pays a high price for that. It is a bit like people complaining about the Pax Romana and claim to be oppressed and abused. But Pax Romana makes sure that there are peace and law and order. People would often have wars and anarchy and no safety and security at all - just the stronger ruling and taking everything away from others on a whim. At least being under the Roman Empire means that there are rules and law and order - even if some people pay a terrible price for that. ‘The greater good’ and all that. And....”
Lilith paused and thought for a few moments if she should tell Jesus this....and then she continued, “Those on the crosses had broken the Roman laws - somehow they were seen as a danger to society - even if they were freedom fighters, who wanted an Israel without Romans. I am not sure that an Israel without Romans would be as peaceful as it is now - or as rich. But some of the people hanging there on the crosses were murderers - and some were innocent.”
Jesus frowned, “Innocent?”
Lilith nodded, “There were rumours about a man and his brother. The man had a wife and children - and a drinking problem. That is why he had killed a Roman soldier. The brother, who was unmarried, took the blame; in order to save his sister-in-law and their children and his brother.....I don’t know if it was the truth or just a rumour.”
Jesus didn’t answer right away. He just frowned and then he said, “That...that was a very brave and stupid thing to do, wasn’t it?”
Lilith smiled, “It was - and very honourable. People sometimes sacrifice things or themselves to help others. Risk their own life - and so does every mother carrying a baby in her womb. If people didn’t sometimes take a risk, the world would be a much more terrifying place to live in.”
Jesus was about to say something as he heard his mother calling, “I better run home..”
In the door he turned and looked at Lilith, “You’ll wait till I return before you burry the dog, right?”
She smiled at him, “I will..”