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All Kittens Must Approve Guests

Summary:

Damian finds a few kittens late one night on patrol and smuggles them home. While attempting to clean them up, Selina stumbles upon them and an accidental heart to heart takes place.

Notes:

Hey! I'm not dead! And I wrote a thing!

Hope you all enjoy!

Work Text:

The rain was pouring and Robin was loathe to admit it, but he was getting tired of patrol. He was fatigued, his clothing was soaked through, and his side was aching from a lucky shot one of Two Face’s goons had gotten in. That was what he got, though, when Father paired him up with Red Robin for the night; the buffoon had been too busy hacking into the computer to notice the hired thugs sneaking up on them, and Robin had reacted too slowly to avoid at least one blow.

So, suffice it to say, Robin was not in the best of moods as he grappled from building to building, being extra-careful not to slip on the rain slick rooftops or put too much strain on his stinging ribs. It was getting late, and he supposed even the criminals had to sleep at some point, as the streets were eerily empty. He began swinging back towards the alley he had stashed his bike and was just preparing to slide the helmet on his head when he heard a sound further down the alley.

Suspicious, Robin turned, one hand on a Batarang as he stalked forward, peeking into the darkness. It wasn’t what he thought it might be, though; instead of some homeless civilian, or late night brawl, or muttering junkie, instead he found a cardboard box, practically falling apart at the seams from the torrential downpour. He pulled back the flaps and felt his heart jerk in sympathy; inside, there were six little kittens, all struggling on top of each other attempting to crawl their way to freedom and away from the growing puddle of water in the bottom of the box.

Robin shifted uncomfortably; if he left them here now, they would most likely drown. But if he brought them home, Father would most likely give him that disappointed scowl he so loathed. It just took one more look at the poor drowning kittens for Robin to make up his mind, though, and he quickly grabbed the box, praying it would hold up long enough for him to get them to the mouth of the alley as he called for the Batmobile and sent his bike back to the Cave.

He only had to wait a few minutes in the rain before the car stopped in front of him, but he was less relieved to see that Red Robin was also inside, strapped behind the steering wheel and giving him a longsuffering look as Robin gently set the box in the back seat and slid in beside his brother.

“Not a word,” Robin grumbled, clicking the seatbelt into place with a glare.

Red Robin just grumbled under his breath, took one look back at the mewling box, and drove them home in silence. “I would hide them good, tonight. Batman had a bad night, I think,” Red Robin warned once they arrived in the Cave, before disappearing into the shower room and leaving Robin to mull over his options.

He took the box with the kittens and carefully placed them on a bench, taking each one gingerly and wiping them down with a soft towel. He left them piled together in a spare clean box set up by the storage closet before turning toward the locker room, himself.

A few minutes later, freshly showered and already padding up the stairs with the box in his arms, Damian turned just enough to see Tim Drake-Wayne now sitting at the Bat Computer, still in full uniform but cowl pulled back. He debated with himself for a long moment before meeting his brother’s curious gaze and proceeding to give the older boy a serious, overly formal nod of thanks for his assistance and advice.

Father wouldn’t hurt the kittens, Damian knew, but he might tell Damian he had to get rid of them.

At the top of the stairs he stuck his head through the clock, checking to see if anyone was waiting in the room, before striding out and quickly making his way to his room. He immediately took the kittens to his bathroom and set about thoroughly washing and drying them, and then scrounged up some food and water for them before placing them in an emptied-out dresser drawer to rest for the night.

He fell asleep that night to the quiet mewling of his newest pets, and drifted off to the thoughts of what he might name them, the fact that he needed to call the vet the next day, and what they might look like when they grew older.

The night had started poorly, but at least it had gotten slightly better.

 

***

 

Damian hadn’t left his room the entire morning. It wasn’t too out of character for him, but Selina was at least attempting to take an interest in her fiancé’s children outside of making sure they didn’t kill themselves or each other during patrol.

So, mind made up, Selina took a tray of tea upstairs with her and stopped in front of Damian’s door. Knowing teenage boys, she was careful to knock and receive a half-hearted answer before she stepped inside.

She wasn’t sure what she was expecting him to be doing, but it certainly wasn’t that.

Damian sat cross legged on the floor in front of his dresser, hunched protectively over a drawer he had tugged onto the floor, his eyes dark and threatening as he watched her come closer. She set the tea service on the bedside table and slid to her knees beside the boy, eyes wide in awe and mouth parted in excitement. Damian relaxed just a little at her reaction.

“My, aren’t they little beauties?” she cooed, reaching down into the box to pet at the babies. They cried out for her attention, practically stepping on top of each other to reach her.

Damian tugged the box slightly closer to himself, and only felt slightly bad about it when the kittens toppled over each other. “They’re mine now. I found them drowning in an alley last night.” He shifted uncomfortably, no doubt worrying over Bruce’s reaction to his latest acquisition. Though, really, at least Damian was only collecting animals. Not like his father, who collected orphaned children. The boy bit his lip and he looked up at her uncertainly. “We can keep them. Right?”

Selina laughed as her lips ticked up in amusement. Kneeling beside him, she tilted his head up with a tap to his chin, so they were eye to eye. “Darling, you have such a large heart; always ready to help, always willing to take care of others. Of course we can keep them. I’ll talk your father into it,” she told him with a wink.

Fears assuaged, they turned back to the kittens as one, reaching down to pet and play with the little babies, marveling at their tiny forms and cute little mews.

“You shouldn’t call me that,” Damian finally said into the silence that followed, shifting uncomfortably and refusing to meet her gaze. Selina watched him carefully, waiting for him to explain. He huffed, blowing his hair out of his face as he looked back down at the kittens. “You aren’t my mother. You aren’t even family. You’ll probably be gone soon enough, anyway.” He still wouldn’t look at her, but his body language gave him away easily enough; his shoulders were hunched up to his ears, his cheeks were burning red, and he was biting on his lip as if to keep himself from saying anything more.

“Damian,” she purred, not quite sure what to address first. She wrapped an arm around his slender shoulders and tugged until he was slightly more relaxed beside her. “Darling, I’m not going anywhere. Your father and I have been skirting around each other for years now, and now that he’s finally pulled his head out of his ass long enough to get with the program, I’m not letting that go. You’re stuck with me,” she said softly, shaking his shoulder and laughing into his spiky hair.

Damian’s face looked slightly uncomfortable as he flushed an even darker shade, actively trying to avoid meeting her gaze. “I’m never going to be your mother,” she admitted. “I know Talia will always have that spot in your heart, even now. I know that, and it’s okay. But I will be here for you, every day, no matter what. Just like I’m here for your brothers and sister and all the other little Bats. I promise. Alright?”

Damian still looked unsure, but he nodded anyway, looking slightly less awkward. Selina smirked at the development, leaning forward to rub their noses together affectionately. Damian stared back at her, eyes wide and shocked, but she just laughed at him.

“So. No ‘darlings’, then. Alright. Come on, kitten, let’s go get these little beauties some much-needed supplies. If they’re going to be staying, they’ll need more than a dresser drawer.” She stood fluidly and walked toward the door, but stopped before she got there, turning to look at Damian once more when she noticed he seemed to be stuck to the spot. “Coming, kitten?” she asked sweetly, that little playful smirk still stuck on her face.

Damian blushed but hopped to his feet, finding a place by Selina’s side as they walked out of the room. “That’s really not much better than ‘darling’,” he groused, though he didn’t sound as miffed about it as she thought he might.

“You wanted something different,” Selina reminded him and then steered him toward the garage, snagging a set of keys on their way out the door.

“I can drive,” Damian offered hopefully, but Selina just ran a hand through his hair and told him, firmly and lovingly and adamantly, “No.”

 

***

 

The minute Bruce walked through the front door, Alfred was there waiting for him, an amused look in his eyes as he cryptically said, “You’re going to enjoy this.” He disappeared further into the house and Bruce, thoroughly confused and just a bit worried, followed him.

He searched out one of the others, hoping they could shed light on what it was he would supposedly ‘enjoy’, but Tim was apparently still out, Alfred had disappeared, and Selina and Damian were remaining stubbornly hidden from sight.

Then, there it was; soft conversation was echoing down the hall from the sitting room, and he sighed in relief. He stepped forward, hovering in the doorway to take in the frankly strange scene before him.

Selina and Damian antagonized each other passive aggressively on their worst days and were silently indifferent to each other on their better days. And right now, they were sprawled out on the sofa together, Damian huddled into Selina’s side, both of them covered by multicolored kittens, crawling over their bodies like a furry little living blanket.

“What?” he asked into the silence, more confused than anything else.

Damian glanced up at him and immediately leveled his dirtiest glare at him. “We’re keeping them. Maadar already said.” And then he went right back to playing with his new pets. Selina looked extremely proud of herself, smug and adorable as she preened and ran a hand through Damian’s hair without getting it bitten off.

“Our kitten found some kittens. I said he could keep them, as he was very adamant about it. And, really, there’s only six of them.”

“They are already named. We can’t get rid of them now.”

Bruce knew a losing battle when he saw one, so decided to accept the inevitable, instead. To be truthful, the kittens weren’t the most surprising thing that had just happened; he was more shocked to hear Damian call Selina ‘mother’ in Farsi. Hadn’t they been coldly ignorant of each other just that morning? The boy wouldn’t even call his brothers by their names.

“And what has caused this sudden change?” he wondered aloud, stepping forward to settle down on the other side of Selina, draping an arm around her shoulder and reaching out to tousle his son’s hair.

“We had a little heart to heart,” Selina stated nonchalantly, shrugging her shoulders like it was just that simple. Bruce knew for a fact that Damian had had more than a few ‘heart to hearts’ with Dick, and the boy still called him Grayson.

Damian hummed in agreement, leaning his head against Selina’s shoulder like an aloof cat searching for attention, and suddenly the nickname made a little bit more sense.

Really, though. It was a little ridiculous.

“Kitten, huh?”

Damian blushed, shoving his face into a kitten’s soft fur to hide his blazing cheeks, but Selina just laughed, pure and enchanted. “He refused ‘darling’. I had to think of something off the top of my head.”