Chapter Text
Stan was about to serve a customer their coffee when his phone buzzed in his pocket. The Swiss frowned. Grigor hadn't returned yet. Maybe he had gotten caught up in conversation with Nico and Pierre. Shaking off this feeling of uneasiness, Stan served his customer and fished his phone out of his pocket. He had a message.
Opening it Stans eyes widened and the phone fell to the ground with a loud clatter. Thank God he hadn't had a mug with a hot beverage in his hand or he would have been fucked. His customer shot him an annoying look when the Swiss bend down to grab his device and dusted it off. His blood freezing in his veins upon seeing the image.
Grigor.
His boyfriend was tied up and gagged. A look of pure terror in his face. To prevent his knees from buckling Stan had grabbed the counter. This couldn't be. Grigor had been at Pierres and Nicos. That much time hadn't passed. He would have noticed. Right ??
A message appeared on his screen and Stan tried to control his shaking hand.
If you want him to stay alive be at the docks in 1 hour. Don't test me. I am not in the mood for any of your games, Stanislas.
Nole.
Enraged Stan smacked his open palm against the counter. Making the mug and dish clatter. His customer shooting him an evil glance. Ripping away his apron Stan paced around.
"Leave", he hissed at his customer. When the later didn't move, the Swiss shot him an ice cold glance. The other turning as white as a sheet and hurrying out of the door. The only thing on Stans mind now was Grigor. Nole had overstepped his boundries. He had gone too far this time.
Stan could have forgiven his mishaps. The kisses. The touches. The flirting but not this. Especially not this. This was the man he loved. Nole was threatening the man he loved. Still a small part of Stans brain. His rational part whispered that Nole was still his brother.
With a heavy sigh Stan hurried upstairs. Glancing at his clock anxiously. The Swiss changed into an all black attire. Grabbing the army knife he had stashed under his bed and put it in the pocket of his pants. The air was freezing when he called a cab but Stan couldn't care for that not now.
He shouldn't have gotten Grigor into this. He should have fallen in love with him in the first place. This was his fault. Everything was his fault. Stan hid his face in his hands. He should have taken better care of Nole.
You can't save him, Lukasz words ghosted in his mind.
The small rational part of his brain whispered, he is your brother.
Stan wanted to scream in frustration. It was either Grigor or Nole. He couldn't have both. Stan knew that Nole wouldn't attack him when he would show up. Not immediately at least. No one knew what was going on in his brain. The Swiss still hoped that he could help his friend.
Yeah what a nice friend indeed who threatened to kill your lover, his head mocked.
Stan wanted the old Nole back. The funny and warm Nole. The happy Nole. He is dead you fool. Just accept it. So this would be the culmination of all huh ?? Stan knew that he would have to hurt Nole to get Grigor out of there, he wasn't ready however. Threats were one thing but the Swiss had never layed a hand on the other. Never.
Stan was truly fighting with himself. He just wanted Grigor back but he knew Nole wouldn't go down without a fight. If it came to this Stan would be prepared to fight the person he considered a brother.
The cab came to a halt. Stan paying the driver. The gust of wind didn't make him shiver.
If Nole had Girgor then the Serb would have told him the truth about Stan nature. Even if this was over, Stan could only lose. He would lose Grigor and he would probably lose Nole too.
Breathing out through his nose and bracing himself for whatever he would see or would happen, Stan made his way to the docks. Rounding the corner, the Swiss frowned. If he was honest he had expected Nole to wait for him. Instead he found Grigor who was tied to a pole. His eyes wide when seeing Stan. His voice being muffled by the cloth around his mouth. Instinctively Stan had the urge to run up to him and untie his boyfriend. Hug him tight and make sure he was ok.
But Nole wouldn't make it that easy for him.
Years of knowing his friend, if he could even be called a friend at this point, Stan knew him inside out. He also knew that this was a trap to make him feel safe. Nole would jump out of a corner and try to kill him if he resisted.
Stan rose his hand to make Grigor calm down. The Bulgarian breathing out through his nose heavily.
"Show yourself Novak."
A chuckle emerged from behind Stan making him whirl around. An animalistic snarl leaving his throat.
"Oh now I am Novak ?? What happened to Nole, Stanislas ??"
"You lost that right", Stan growled, clenching his fist tight. He would punch the Serb in the face.
"Don't forget who has the upper hand here, Stanislas."
Noles eyes were hard. He was angry. Very angry. It was radiating off him like a heatstroke. Stan could practically see that anger. It was like Nole was emiting it in waves.
"That bastard took you away from me. If I can't have you no one can. Even if this is over he won't want you anyway Stanislas. Take the easy way out. Come with me."
Nole held his hand out towards the Swiss who never moved from where he stood. He just shook his head sadly. He would fight then. In the depths of his heart Stan had hoped it wouldn't come to this. This small, small fraction of his mind and heart didn't want to hurt Nole.
"You are not my brother anymore."
Something in Noles eyes changed. If there had been hope in his heart that Stan would go with him, this was the point where he realized that there was none left.
"Then you will die with him", Nole roared. Stan could see the tears for in his eyes. This shouldn't have happened. If Stan would have looked out for Nole this wouldn't have happened. As sad as it sounded Stan knew one of them wouldn't make it out of this alive.
A tear made it's way down his cheek when Nole lunged himself forward like a hungry predator would at it's prey. Stan was prepared. Of course he was. Plus Nole didn't have the pysical strength to tackle him to the ground. Adrenalin did a lot though so the Swiss braced himself for the impact. Where Nole lacked in strenght he made up for with his brain and swiftness.
When Nole came towards him like an angry Hurricane, Stan took a step to the side to try and dodge him. The Serb whipped his arm to the side to try and hit him that way but Stan ducked his head and in returned punched Nole in the ribs making him stagger. Ultimately making him land on his knees. Noles eyes were furious.
"I don't want to fight you Novak please."
"Too late Stanislas. You choose him over me", Nole gritted angrily through his teeth and got up panting. Holding his side.
In the back of his head Stan was still trying to find a way to save Nole.
THERE IS NO WAY, his brain screamed.
It proved to be a mistake to lose focus just for once because Nole was in Stans face in an instant. His foot making contact with Stans injured knee, making the Swiss scream in pain and fall to his knees.
Fuck.
"You forget I know you too Stanislas. There will be no winner. I offered you a way out but you choose HIM over me", Nole said arrogantly and bitterly.
The Serb was very bitter. Despite his eyes being crazy and angry there was this hint of sadness in them. They couldn't stop this now. One of them would die it was inevitable.
Stan squeezed his eyes shut as he supported his body with his arms trying to get up. His knee still protesting. Maybe all of them would die here today. No one knew that. Guilt washed over Stan like a tidal wave. Guilt for not having been able to help Nole. Guilt for having dragged Grigor into this. Maybe he really should have died that day.
Now Lady was Fate was a cruel mistress.
It was either Nole or Grigor.
In his heart Stan already knew the answer. There was only one innocent life in all of this. Him and Nole had commited too many crimes already. They were tainted and maybe they both deserved to die. Nole wouldn't die alone. For a split second Stan really considered that option. The easy way out.
Live. Lukasz damn voice was still talking to him.
He wanted to live but when this was over there would be nothing worth living for. Stan wasn't sure if he could live with the guilt.
Nole snapped him out of his thoughts by throwing himself at him. Making it hard to breathe for a second when his knees drove into his stomach. His eyes weren't crazy anymore. Rough, huge hands wrapped themselves around Stans neck and squeezed. Hard. Tears falling from Noles eyes.
"LOOK WHAT YOU ARE MAKING ME DO."
Nole was hurting too. There was a fraction of rationality in his voice. He didn't want to do what he was doing. Stan had provoked him. Had forced him to do what he had to do. If it wouldn't have been for Grigor, Stan would have let the Serb strangle him. There was no point in fighting anyway. Tears had pooled in Noles eyes. Falling down his chin and on to Stans face. His heart was screaming at him to make it stop.
He cared about Nole. He had fed his friend a lie. He was still his brother.
Stan choked miserably. Trying to kick Nole away. His vision was getting blurry. Fuck. He couldn't and wouldn't die like this. He had to get Grigor out of this. Grigors muffled screams could be heard from behind them. Fuck Stan loved him so much. So damn much. With a swift movement the Swiss managed to roll them around and kick Nole away from him. Wheezing and coughing for air.
"Don't make this even more difficult for me Stanislas."
"Then stop Nole. Just stop."
Stan knew it was too much to ask. The Serb grabbed something from behind his back. The Swiss eyes widening.
"You can't handle the sight of blood Novak. We both know that. You won't stab me."
Nole snarled.
"I wanted to throw your little boy toy in the ocean. Let him sink like a stone. A great idea don't you think."
Nole threw his head back and laughed. The madness had taken over again. Stan was punched in the face. He was still slow from the lack of oxygen. The Serb was taking advantage of that to pin him down again. Holding the knife against his throat.
"You betrayed me for a bitch."
Nole was trying to stab him but Stan rolled around on his side. Grabbing the Serbs wrists and turning them around so Stan was straddling his hips and pinning him down. Desperately trying to get the knife away from both of them preferably. Nole snarled and shouted.
The next thing Stan saw was Noles eyes widening in shock. His mouth hanging open. His eyes huge in fear. At first Stan didn't understand. Then he saw the bloody knife in his hand. His own eyes widening. Fuck what the hell had just happened ?? A pool of blood was forming around Noles torso. The knife falling on to the concrete with a clatter.
"Stanislas ??", Nole asked his voice laced with fear. He sounded so scared and young. This voice was the voice that Stan had heard when Noles parents had died. It was like they were kids again.
Oh God.
"Stanislas ??"
Stan dared to look down. There was a deep wound where the knife had torn the flesh. Blood seeping out like a river. Instinctively Stan untied his sweater from his waist and pressed it against the wound. Fuck what had he done ??
"Stanislas I am scared. Please don't leave me alone please."
Before Stan even noticed tears were rolling down his cheeks. Fuck what had he done ??
Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.
Nole had grabbed Stans shirt desperately. His eyes going hollow upon seeing the blood. He screamed.
"Make this stop. Make this stop please."
"Shh", Stan cooed and cradled Noles head in his lap. Running a hand through his short raven hair. Both their phones were shattered from their fight. He couldn't even call for help. Fuck. What had he done ??
Nole was breathing was getting ragged. Stan flinched when his friends hand cupped his cheek. He didn't want to look. He had promised to protect him and now Nole was dying in his arm. He sobbed.
"I am sorry. Oh God I am so sorry."
"Stanislas…"
Stan looked up. Noles hand on his cheek was warm.
"I… I love you Stanislas."
Then the hand slid down Stans cheek and fall on to the concrete with an ear deafening sound. Noles eyes were wide open and hollow. At least he had died with his eyes open. Looking at the person he had loved the most. The person who had ultimately betrayed and killed him.
Stan roared in agony. Pressing his face into his brothers chest and crying like a little child. Apologizing over and over again. Holding him closer than he had ever done. The tears just wouldn't stop and Stan found himself caressing Noles face. For a second he thought about closing Noles still open eyes but then he shook his head. His brother would be afraid of the dark.
Gently the body was laid on the ground. A noise making Stan whirl around.
Oh God Grigor.
The Swiss untied the other stepping away from him but Grigor threw himself at him. Hiding his face in his neck. Stan held him close. Grateful that the other wasn't pushing him away and then his knees buckled. He sobbed again hiding his face in his hands. He had killed Nole. He had killed his brother.
"Baby look at me. Look at me please."
Gently Stans hands were removed from his face. Grigor stroking his cheeks. Stan couldn't look at him. He had lost everything. Nole and now Grigor.
"I am so sorry I got you into this. I lied to you I… Everything is my fault."
Grigor hugged him again, stroking his hair they were kneeling on the floor by now. Holding on to eachother like a lifeline.
"I don't deserve you but I am so glad you are ok."
Grigor pressed his forehead against Stans and they just breathed together until Stan calmed down enough to stand on his own. The Swiss looked at Noles body hiding his face in Grigors shoulder who supported him so Stan wouldn't collapse.
"I can't leave him alone. I can't. He is afraid of the dark. Please he is afraid of the dark."
Stan just sobbed and Grigors heart broke.
1 year later
Noles funeral had taken a lot out of Stan. He had disbanded the gang right after the incident at the docks. Everything reminded him of Nole. Everything. The pain of having killed his brother never faded. He had handed Rafa and his gang the rulership of New York City.
Grigor had stayed by his side all of the way. Stan would be forever grateful to him. If it wouldn't have been for him, Stan would have lost his mind. He had even thought about death. Grigor kept pulling him out. Tried healing him with his love. He was there when Stan woke up in the morning and when they fell asleep together in the evening.
Stan had buried Nole on his own. The only person to be there had been Grigor. He had told his boyfriend everything. What had happened in the past and what had happened before he met him. They were past the stage of lies. That had been Grigors wish.
No more lies.
Stan hadn't lied to him. Not anymore.
He had played the guitar at Noles funeral. Holding the instrument close. It was the only thing he had left of his brother. The only relic left of a better time. When they had been kids. When they had been happy.
Stan hoped that Nole had found his peace. He hoped he had seen his parents again.
Maybe Stan would find his own peace too. Grigor was with him all the way.
On Noles 1st year anniversary Stan opened another coffee shop. In Brooklyn.
Nole's. Maybe this would be his peace.
Grigor hugged him tightly from behind. Kissing his cheek.
"I am proud of you babe. I love you so much." Stan had nodded.
When he turned around to kiss Grigor a gust of wind passed them. A stray tear running down Stans cheek.
They would be ok.