Work Text:
The Doctor went back into his TARDIS, after his hug from his friends Bill and Nardole. Quite heartbroken that he wasn't able to get one from another companion that he lost so long ago. Testimony returned the Doctor's memories of said companion through a kiss on the cheek. He was able to have a brief conversation with them, but it didn't last long as he has expected. He walked into the TARDIS with a struggle, holding on to the rails. He never did that before; only in dire, life or death situations. He looked up from the gray floors of his Time-Machine to see a person standing at the other side of the console, their back facing the Doctor. He squints just to see who it is, they wore a grey jumper. He peers to his right to see that they were wearing black leggings.
"Who are you?" he says, almost too quietly, but enough for the person to hear.
"Doctor?"
That voice, oh how long has it been since he has heard that voice. The dying TimeLord's eyes widen in shock. Could it be? No, it can't. She's already dead. How could this be possible? Another projection perhaps? Is she even real?
Like the stubborn TimeLord he is, he questions the person in front of him; walking still gripping on to the rails, "Who are you and what have you done?"
"Doctor, it's me!" the woman pulled up her hair to expose the back of her neck. It showed the number zero in a font that isn't modern at all, more so set in the 1400s.
Tears welled up in his eyes as he recalled the memory of trying to get Clara back from dying in the Trap Street, "Clara..."
he let go of the rails that supported him and began running towards her before tripping on his shoes. Tumbling to the ground, he groaned in pain as he tried to get back up again, desperately trying to see his impossible girl once more. Clara, the impossible girl, her shoes were right in front of him. She crouched down and picked up his chin with her finger, forcing the Doctor to look into her eyes.
"Clara... my Clara." he wrapped his arms around the dying woman, holding on to her tightly like a lifeline. The Doctor buried his head onto her shoulders as he sobs, "you came back to me..."
She didn't feel like glass at all; she was cold, yes. However, it was a different kind of cold. It was the kind of cold you would expect from a dead body that used to be occupied by a soul. The Doctor didn't believe in Heaven or Hell, but when he was with his impossible girl, that quite changed his view because Heaven was with Clara.
"You're real." His voice cracked as he gripped her tighter. He couldn't hold it in anymore, tears tracked down his face and onto Clara's grey jumper. He was shaking; he can't believe it! She was real.
"Daft Old Man." to the Doctor's own surprise, he heard Clara sniffle. He should be the one to do that, but instead, he was shaking.
They both hugged in comfortable silence not wanting to let go of each other. The two stood up at the same time. The Doctor held on to the console and let go of his former companion, with his right hand still holding onto Clara's shoulder.
"I'm sorry...", the Doctor mumbled.
Clara cocked her head to one side in confusion, "why? Why are you sorry, Doctor?"
His voice was hoarse, and croaky after the crying. Hell, it might come back anyways, "for thinking what I thought was right for you. I was so selfish that I didn't think about how you would feel. Out of all the people that I care the most." his head hung in shame and continued, "I didn't think about what you would have thought."
The Doctor tried to reach for Clara's face, to hold on to so carefully, but as he did so, he doubled in pain over feeling the regeneration energy trying to break free.
No, not now, he thought to himself. Not now, because Clara is here.
He was weak and Clara found that. She reached over to the Doctor who was in pain and placed a hand on his back, rubbing in circles.
"Doctor, everyone has to go some time." She cupped his face and wiped away a stray tear falling on his cheek. "Change, Doctor."
"I-I don't want to. I'm scared Clara."
"Yes, I know, but everyone has to move on eventually. Someone told me that, we all change, just as long as we remember the person that we used to be."
The TimeLord chuckled, "You're quoting me now?"
Clara smiled sadly, how could he still keep up a joke? When he is dying.
"Doctor, my time is almost up too."
"Of course... I can't keep you long because you're already dying." he sighs. He hugs Clara again, in hopes that she won't disappear. "Silly old universe. Always bringing us together but in the end, keeping us apart."
"That's life Doctor."
The Doctor smiled, knowing that she was right. It was life.
Clara pulled away from the hug giving him a sad smile, "I have to go, Doctor. My time is up."
"Clara, wait. Before you go-" she interrupted him by giving him a kiss. Their actual first kiss. No, no tongues. Just a peck, one second long. Again, a tear fell from the Doctor's eyes. His hearts swelled.
"-I love you, my Impossible Girl."
"I love you too, my Doctor." she smiled back at him and vanished from the TARDIS.
As Clara vanished from the TARDIS, he lowered his head and processed what just happened. She kissed him. He smiled, at least he was accepted in this old body of his. He gripped onto the TARDIS console to prevent him from crashing on to the ground. He circled the machinery of his alive TARDIS until he stopped and pulled down the take-off lever. He stepped away from the console and began walking to where the monitors have been placed; his pace slow and steady.
"Oh, there it is, silly old universe." He took a pause and walked towards the monitor showing what seemed to be the universe, labeled in circular Gallifreyan. "The more I save it, the more it needs saving. It's a treadmill." he sighed, looking up at the TARDIS, pondering if he should continue. If to let the universe grow cold, or go saving it, "Yes, yes I know they'll get it all wrong without me." he said aloud to the TARDIS. His voice, he sounded so tired of the world, but he couldn't help himself. He was tired of being lonely. His voice was croaky and hoarse as if he ran miles and miles.
Which he did, but he ran for miles and miles for a completely different reason and now that motive has changed. At first, he was bored, but now he was scared. But in the words of himself and Clara's, scared is a superpower.
The TARDIS beeped in response. Take it as you will, the Doctor knew.
"Well, I suppose, one more lifetime. Won't kill anyone."
He looked down on his hand to see the flames of regeneration.
"Well except me."