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2019-06-27
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2022-08-15
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18/?
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The Man Who Sold the World

Chapter 18: Better Sense Says, Turn the Record Over

Summary:

Tony comes clean about some stuff to the people that matter, lays down some boundaries, and knows when to move on. Rhodey was a good student in his mother's kitchen, and he will always worry about Tony. Added bonus: Tony fucking hates Elon Musk (and you should too). Don't worry, he'll tell you why. You're welcome.

Notes:

Chapter title comes from the song 45 by The Gaslight Anthem. It's about moving on, and it's badass.

This is a bit of a housekeeping chapter. Things to tie up before I move into the next arc.

Also, I hate the word neuron/neurone... Technically both are correct. If I eff it up and interchange the spelling, apologies.

No beta. All mistakes are belong to me. Anything glaringly wrong, point it out, and a shiny No-Prize is yours in the next chapter's opening notes.

Again, more apologies for neglecting this. July and into August were busy as hell. My aging parents were ill (literally almost had to bluelight my mom up to the E.R. due to a fever... But she's gonna be okay, and she's hopefully learned a lesson in listening to what her body is telling her). And it's been a whole thing. *waves hand vaguely in the direction of EVERYTHING*

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Tony did end up making it for Morgan’s bedtime, though he had to school himself to be calm and present in the moment for her. He wanted to tear into the code he’d been given. He wanted to yell at the officials from SWORD a little longer. After their shock at seeing him alive again was over, they’d tried to yell at him first. But he turned the tables on them when Tony explained that slavery was only legal in the country if one paid minimum wage, and let the individual have a choice about doing the work. “He’s a sentient being! You can’t fucking own him!” That was when Stephen had made him take a few physical steps back before he considered firing up the Unibeam again. Tony took Stephen’s sober second thought to heart. That second thought was to threaten legal action from Stark Industries due to them appropriating proprietary tech, and only then to his even further disgust, the officials got very quiet.

So Tony had to calm himself at the Sanctum for a bit before going to Morgan. She’d missed him the night before when he’d been with Stephen, and was particularly clingy. Tony made an exception and they read two chapters of the book she was reading together to make up for it. Morgan had also been placated by the news that Auntie Nebula and Uncle Rocket were coming for a visit and she squealed in delight.

Tony eventually got her to calm down, and held her until she fell into a deep sleep, and kissed her forehead when he left, leaving her with an Iron Man plushie he’d bought for her ages ago. Oh he loved her so. He hadn’t ever been quite sure he’d ever make a decent father, but Pepper insisted he’d been doing just fine so far.

Pepper looked at him with a serene smile after they left the bedroom. Her perfume was the same and Tony was over the moon to know she still used it. They’d picked it out together on the Champs-Élysées, and she’d worn it ever since.

“So, Pepper, I’m about to have a bit of a breakthrough when it comes to some medical tech research,” Tony said. He was finally very close to getting those artificial neurons right, and was certain the code that Death had provided him with would help with the process.

“Oh?” She asked mildly.

“I’m going to make paralysis a thing of the past,” Tony said proudly.

“I… What? Do you really mean that?” Pepper asked.

“Yeah. I’ve been working on… basically what amounts to artificial neurons,” Tony said. “I think I‘m closer on that than I am on the solar project. That one will need to have all the environmental clearances going for power storage first. I want to do it clean, and I need to ask Rocket about failsafes and safety measures. But yes, artificial neurons.”

“Holy shit, Tony,” Pepper said. “You’re doing this for Rhodey, aren’t you?”

“Well, yeah, but not only for him. There are certain projects I’d like to actively make as little as possible on… Just have them be good things for the world. This would be one of them,” Tony said.

“I understand that. We could even go full non-profit on it and use the tax write off,” Pepper mused. Tony smiled at his savvy CEO.

“Pepper Potts, you, are awesome,” Tony said, his excitement about the project crept into his tone.

“This… This could help Nebula too, couldn’t it? Even Rocket might want a few upgrades,” Pepper said. That gave Tony pause.

“I suppose it could. Good thing they’re enroute,” Tony said.

“Yes, Rhodey mentioned Gamora and Natasha. Though I didn’t get much more than ‘what the fuck, Pep?’ and ‘this is crazy’ from him,” Pepper said with the affectionate, mild annoyance she’d mastered when it came to Tony.

“Yeah, that was part of the tasks Stephen and I were asked to set right as part of my return.”

“There was a trade off? With whom?” Pepper asked. “Because if it’s Strange, I’ll end him.”

“No no no, Pep. Stephen agreed to help me, even though he didn’t really have to. I was asked by… Forces that exist outside of our mortal coil, would be the best way to put it, to complete some tasks that will ensure our little timeline continues on as planned. Gamora and Natasha were a part of that. Bringing Rogers back to where his fate cast him was part of that. And Stephen didn’t have to help me, not really. He offered. Because he still feels guilty for my death, and partly because he already feels like a close friend. All those futures he saw, many were spent in close proximity to me. He’s not like SHIELD or the Avengers. He doesn’t want to take his pound of flesh and then fuck off when I’m no longer convenient for him. He wants me to stay at the Sanctum as long as I’d like. He… likes having me there… and so help me, I’m taking a shine to the weirdness of it. He and Wong didn’t even want to accept a rent payment to help out at first. They were just going to let me stay in perpetuity without contributing. Evidently there isn't a lot of real world money in sorcery, and they're just, kinda used to that. Needless to say, we’ve worked out a deal now, but it wasn’t required,” Tony explained. “I hope you don’t mind me being there, because I do like it, and I plan to stay for the foreseeable future.”

“You… You like him don’t you?” Pepper said. It was phrased as a question, but her tone was more of a statement.

“Yeah,” Tony admitted. “I’m getting to. I hope that doesn’t piss you off… But… He’s a good person, Pep. Reminds me of you in all the best ways. Despite or because of his profession, he’s… steady. I like that. And he likes me. Even with my ongoing dramatic weirdness. So yes, I’m getting to like the very aptly named Stephen Strange.” He wasn’t going to lie to her now. Not after all they’d endured together. Even if he spared her the more graphic details, it was going to make things more awkward between them, but he needed to be truthful with her.

“I… So long as you’re happy and healthy, and able to be there for Morgan. I do still care about you, Tony. We may not be married anymore, but, I want you to be alright,” Pepper said. She looked wistful, but Tony could tell she didn’t regret her choice.

“And I want the same for you… I want you to have the absolute best life you possibly can. You deserve that and more. I’m doing okay. Better than just okay, I promise. I’m getting my life back, and that’s probably more than I deserve,” Tony said.

“Oh, Tony, please don’t say that. The world really does need you, and you know how much I hate to feed into that ego of yours, but it’s true,” she said. “I want to see what you have up your sleeve for ideas… And I want S.I. to be an entity for good in the world. Both projects you’ve mentioned could be revolutionary to everyone on the planet… I am thrilled at the idea. But I have to make sure everything, even with Dr. Strange, is on the up and up. So, who exactly asked you to set things right?”

Tony considered the question, but again didn’t even consider lying to her as an option. Because he trusted Pepper, and after everything, he knew she could handle the reality. “There’s an afterlife, Pep. I never made it all the way there, but there is one… And Death is a personified force in the universe. She’s… scary. True. But also she wants to see how we are able to manage with our little timeline. It’s one of the few where most people ended up surviving Thanos,” Tony said. Pepper’s eyebrows moved up her forehead a touch.

“And yeah, it’s weird. Far weirder than I ever expected. But in a way, she also reminds me of you. She likes things orderly and running as intended… And she… likes me? I think she finds me cute. Sort of like an adorable baby animal. I’m gonna go with something akin to a fuzzy helpless baby Harp Seal… She’s been very accommodating. She wants Stephen and I to continue working to stabilize our timeline, and… to look for people who are capable and moral enough to bear the Infinity Stones.”

“What?” Pepper said. She only just managed to keep her voice down for the sake their sleeping daughter.

“Yeah,” Tony said, relieved to have that out in the open.

“I… What? Oh, oh my god. Does that me she wants you to have one?” Pepper asked.

“I already have one, actually,” Tony said. He took a few steps back and moved the nanobots away like he had for Rhodey, exposing the glow of the Soul Stone within him. But only for a moment. Only long enough for her to see and understand what she was looking at. Then he closed himself back up safely again. “It’s helping me stay here in the mortal realm. It’s… Got a personality of its own. All of them do. Stephen has the Time Stone again… So yeah, I’ve been holding off on telling you until I knew it was safe. I apologize for that. But this was bigger than little ol’ me, ya know?”

“Oh Tony,” Pepper said softly. To his surprise, she drew him into a warm, gentle hug. The lack of fear was interesting, but then he remembered that this was not the same Pepper he kissed on the roof after the incident at the Stark Expo all those years ago. Her very nature was to temper chaos, and ever since donning the Rescue armour during the final battle with Thanos, she had a better understanding of Tony’s obligation. Now that her emotions towards him were sorted and settled, she could better empathize.

“So we’re okay?” Tony asked. Pepper pulled back and brought her slender hand up to touch his cheek… His scarred cheek.

“We're okay,” she said softly. “Thank you for loving us all enough to endure all of this.” Tony cracked, and his eyes dampened as he smiled at her.

“Thank you for seeing that I did this because of love,” Tony murmured back.

“Tony, I’ve questioned your methods, and frankly, your sanity, from time to time. But never your motivation,” Pepper said. Tony smiled broadly at her.

“Fair,” Tony replied. “And even if it’s no longer a romantic thing, I… I want you to know that I will always love you, Virginia Potts. You’ll always be my closest family, my best friend, and… yeah… You’ll always have me as close as you want me.”

“Love you too, Tony,” she said. “I… Thank you for understanding why I… can’t… But I want you to you know I’m so happy you’re back with us.”

“Good… I’m glad we can still be here for one another,” he agreed. Pepper lingered in his embrace, but Tony could tell there was nothing more than familial love behind it. In a way, it was a relief to be able to hold her and tell her he still loved her, even if they weren’t together. Because it was the complete truth. He did love her and always would on some level. So this level of honesty was a relief. The moment passed and Tony let her go. “We need to start thinking about making an announcement that I’m back,” Tony said.

“We do. Do you want a formal press conference, or would you rather drop an offensive shitpost meme on your Twitter account that makes you out to be Jesus Christ?” She asked. Tony laughed and had to smother it for Morgan’s sake.

“While I would certainly enjoy a shitpost meme on Twitter, it’s a little too Elon Musk for me. I like to be original in my shenanigans. Elon copies me, but like, always shittier, ya know?”

“Tell me about it. After you passed, the Muskrats were calling for him or Hammer to buy S.I. or be installed as CEO or head of R&D,” Pepper said.

“Those charlatans? Gross,” Tony said and pulled a face. “I’d rather hand the reins over to Hank Pym’s delusional old ass. At least their science was always sound, and Hope isn’t nearly as awful as her old man… What PymTech does usually at least tries to better society as a whole. Elon just wants to make toys for rich people. It was so much more pleasant when Elon was dusted. Tesla was thriving. But oh no, had to come back with the rest of everyone else. And then he just started railing on about the same old projects that will never see completion… If anything, his bullshit should be part of the reason I do go public. Distract people away from him,” Tony said. “Hey, wanna do everything he proposes, but like, actually make it work on a mass scale for real people, and meet an agreed upon deadline for launch? That could be a fun couple of weeks.”

“So long as we’re not going to end up with a lawsuit over proprietary intellectual property, have at it,” Pepper said with a little shrug.

“You mean the Hyperloop design he plagiarized from a century old patent? Or any of the other ‘ideas’ he’s stolen? Pretty sure he hasn’t been able to patent the idea of a train… Only a train, but more shitty and less efficient. Or a rocket, but more shitty and less efficient. Or his other big hit, a transport truck, but shittier and WAY less efficient… Never trust a car salesman to build a public transportation system. It’s not in their mindset to remove the profit motive and focus on public service and infrastructure. That’s one thing I’ve noticed about that germaphobe. All his designs are meant for individual transportation, or transportation for the very wealthy few. Like, I’m sorry, we don’t need cross-planetary rocket travel. We fucking need trains that run on time and don’t reek of urine so people can get to work and school safely… And… Oh… Oh god. Oh no,” Tony said, and looked aghast a sudden thought crossing his mind.

“What?”

“That solar power system I’m working on… I’ve almost worked out the type of condensed battery storage he needs to make everything his weird-ass self desires… Oh, I’m gonna make him my bitch. How exciting,” Tony said and rubbed his hands together eagerly. “We can make his crap reality, and then watch it really fail in practice due to inefficiency and impractical costs. I can’t wait for him to come sucking up and then try to take credit for it and infiltrate the board. Kicking slimy fucks off of the S.I. board has been some of your best work, Ms. Potts. Think you still got the magic touch?”

“Always, Mr. Stark,” she replied with a shark-like grin. Tony adored her for it. And this is how and why they would always be best together as a team, outside of co-parenting of course. Utterly curb stomping dipshits who thought they could take people’s money and not give them returns on their investment was their medium of choice. Pepper in particular was an artist in that regard. They could have fun with this. He could already see the wheels turning in Pepper’s head. She’d never thought much of Musk. Ranked him slightly higher than Hammer, but he lost points for somehow being even more creepy than Justin.

She was going to have her dish of revenge ice cold where it concerned Musk’s dismissive nature when it came to her.

“Great. Good plan. Let’s set a press conference up for after Quill and his crew arrive, alright?” Tony said.

“You got it,” Pepper said. “I’ll get the P.R. team to write a speech for you to go completely off script of.”

“You’re the best, Pepper.”

 

Tony returned to the Sanctum to find the delightful situation of Stephen dozing in the bath. Stephen’s energy had been restored, but clearly he was still a bit sore from the previous night and day’s activities. The tub was an old, massive, clawfoot, art deco thing. Tony tapping and cracking the door open caused Stephen to open an eye. “Long day, baby?” Tony asked.

“Mmm, yeah,” Stephen said. “Come on in. Nothing you haven’t seen.”

“Oh goodie, I do enjoy a good view,” Tony said. Stephen chuckled low. “Still feeling alright?”

“Much better,” Stephen said, and sighed happily. “How were Pepper and Morgan?”

“Morgan missed me last night, so-”

“Oh, shit!” Stephen said, sitting bolt upright in the bath. “I completely forgot about her last night. I’m SO sorry.” He scrubbed his face with his wet hand. Tony went over to the tub, and placed his hand on Stephen’s cheek, shushing him gently.

“Hey, shh… It’s okay… If Pepper and I are separated, Morgan is going to have to get used to the odd night when I’m not there, or the idea of a night when I have her and Pepper isn’t there. We can still have a well-balanced, remarkable, child who doesn’t hate either of her parents. She will get used to the idea. Remember, she has a piece of jewelry that she can tap at any time to get a physical response from me. It wirelessly charges up any time she is in proximity to FRIDAY’s servers or hardware, or via solar energy if she’s outside. She pinged me a few times last night, and I responded every time. So she knew that I was out there, thinking of her. Such is the beauty of an A.I. mind is that I can be thinking in multiple ways at once. She’s gonna be fine, Stephen. I will be there for every moment I can for her. If she was in dire need, she would be the priority. If both of you were in need, due to her youth right now, she would be the priority… But last night, you weren’t well. You had to be looked after. And that’s okay. Morgan has an incredible, capable mom, who can look after and reassure her just fine… Morgan is getting to like you an awful lot, you know. She asked after you this evening, and wanted to know if you were feeling better. So, chill out. My kid won’t be traumatized because I had to help someone who was also important to me,” Tony said. He picked up a wash cloth, and a bar of soap, and started to lather up Stephen’s back for him. Stephen hunched forward, relishing the intimate touch.

“I still feel shitty about it,” Stephen grumbled. “I don’t want to be the reason you have to spend one moment away from Morgan."

“Welcome to blended family parenthood, Stephen. Look, if I was with her every single moment, that’s just going to lead to separation anxiety, which would be equally as cruel to her in the long run. She needs to learn to trust that her adults will always come back after they leave. Just don’t try to buy your way out of guilt. Nurture her instead,” Tony said and smiled. “Spend some time with her, and teach her something new. She’ll love you forever for that… Last night wasn’t just us getting off. We both know that. It felt like something much more, and I’m quietly thrilled by all of it. I wasn’t sure that this level of… intimacy, and joy, was still possible with me like this. And it is. It definitely is. It felt like the most human I’ve been since I came back.”

Stephen turned and looked up at Tony, eyes filled to the brim with tears of adoration. Tony slid down the side of the tub and on to his knees on the tiled floor. He reached out and guided Stephen’s lips to his. He favoured Stephen with the softest kiss he could manage, full of promises and understanding. He gently rinsed Stephen’s back, and he felt the muscles beneath his hands lose their tension. Stephen eventually leaned back on the back of the tub and let out a contented sigh. “I don’t deserve to be so happy,” Stephen murmured.

“They hell you say, Stephen Strange. We’ve both earned it. Let it happen,” Tony retorted playfully. “Now, outta this tub. You’re getting pruny.”

Stephen reluctantly pulled the plug and stood up, only to be met with Tony holding his towel out. Tony didn’t hand it to him, rather he started drying Stephen down with steady, careful hands. Stephen couldn’t remember the last time someone had done that for him outside of his time in the hospital after his accident. Perhaps his mother before he’d been of the age to do it for himself. And while part of his mind told him to shoo Tony away and do it himself, he firmly told it to shut the fuck up and just soak in this moment of calm and care. It was so rare in his world, and he promised to let himself savour it.

Tony spent the night hacking at the design for the artificial neurons, a fire lit up under him now that Quill and the crew were on the way. He wanted something to present to Rocket and Nebula once they arrived. The code that he’d been given made all lingering questions vanish. He married the new code with what he had already designed, and was very pleased with the results by the time he slipped in to bed with Stephen a few hours before dawn. Again, Stephen rolled toward Tony in his sleep, as if he’d been doing this for millions of years. Even unconscious, his body saw Tony as comfort and safety, and it was that on thought that Tony let his own body rest and shut down on.

 

The next day, he made the point to tell Stephen he should visit with Gamora and Rhodey at the compound. To his surprise, Stephen wanted to go with him to check up on her and possibly Natasha as well. After the appropriate texts were exchanged, they found Rhodey was waiting near the entrance of the compound, and he started herding them toward the guest quarters where Gamora was staying.

Tony quickly mentally reviewed the compound’s security tapes, and quickly got the answer why. Apparently Rogers had been spending a lot of time around wherever Rhodey was, probably to try and figure out where Tony was. As soon as they were through the secure doors of the guest wing, Tony paused. “So, how bad are they being?” Tony asked.

“Were they always this bad?” Rhodey asked, skipping any preamble.

“And then some,” Tony admitted.

“The fuck, Tony? What the actual fuck is wrong with that psycho? He’s got all of them trained like a pack of war dogs,” Rhodey said. “FRIDAY keeps me ahead of them, but they are definitely sniffing around.”

“I… I spoiled them at the start is my best guess. I let my guilt complex get the better of me and started downplaying my self-worth to cater to their wants to get them to like me,” Tony admitted freely, which seemed to surprise both Rhodey and Stephen. “Still trying to buy acceptance… That’s my toxic trait. Growing up, I had very few relationships that weren’t transactional, and one of those people was my parents paid servant. I’m working on it. Right around when Wanda came in and I left, was when I had started to work on it with the right therapist, finally. Then the Accords ratification process started. Then Lagos happened, which blew all my best laid plans for oversight professionally, and healthy boundaries personally, out of the water. I gave it up as a bad job after Thanos’ snap, and then let it be for five years during it, until they came back around and I almost let the pattern start all over again,” Tony said.

Stephen reached out and put a gentle hand on Tony’s arm, which did not go unnoticed by Rhodey. Nor did he miss Tony leaning in to the touch, grateful for the gesture. It was then that Rhodey decided to let Stephen genuinely have his chance with Tony. Rhodey knew that even himself and Pepper were the kind to let Tony stand on his own. He had such an assured manner that Rhodey often would default to letting Tony handle things for himself. The simple movement from Stephen showed Rhodey that Tony had finally found someone who could just step in and support his friend without asking for permission. More importantly, Tony was allowing it and seemed content.

“While I’m glad you’re taking responsibility for your part, this is definitely on them, Tones. This is skirting obsession and abuse. I’m legit worried for you at this point,” Rhodey said. Tony asked FRIDAY to turn the security recording mics off for the moment. He didn’t want anyone hearing sensitive information about his state of being who didn’t need to know it.

“I appreciate that, Rhodey. I really do. But I’m more safe than I ever was before. This body is repairable. So long as my servers remain intact, I’m gonna be fine. Even then, the Soul Stone would probably keep me here… Rogers can’t kill me. He can barely hurt me now physically. Remaining above his emotional bullshit will be the real challenge. So long as he stays away from you, Morgan, Pepper, Happy, Peter, Harley, Vision, FRIDAY, and Stephen, as well as all magic users, then let him spend his energy how he wants… He’s gonna fuck things up again. We just have to be ready to mitigate the damages and prevent casualties,” Tony said.

“What do you think he’s up to?” Rhodey asked shrewdly.

“No idea. Legit have no idea. But he’ll do something. Go too far. The wrong person will get caught up in collateral damage, and he’s gonna end up fucked again. His good will with the public is very fragile. But it’s not my responsibility to take care of his messes anymore. I’m not an Avenger. I’m not SHIELD or SWORD. I don’t have any military or government affiliation. I’m still adhering to the Accords. If he doesn’t make it personal, I’ll be okay. However, now I’m concerned for your welfare while you’re here, and I think that is cause enough to call for a proper psych eval for him… For all of them if necessary. Now that the band is back together, we could do it for all of them. Then it won’t seem so directed at Rogers,” Tony said.

“Natasha’s going to hate that,” Rhodey said.

“I’m sure she will. I don’t care. Honestly, she needs one. A few different kinds of evaluation probably. But again, not my responsibility, and if they can’t see that, well, they’re free to go rogue again and see how far that gets them,” Tony said. He looked over to the common area of the guest quarters and saw Gamora emerge from the bedroom area. “Gamora, hey, how are you holding up?”

“Satisfactory. James is very kind,” she said. Tony extrapolated and then looked at Rhodey with a scandalized expression on his face.

“What masterpiece from your mother’s repertoire of cookery have you made for her in my absence that I didn’t get to partake in?” Tony asked, with an imperious tone, but a grin on his face. He needed the break from talking about Rogers and was going to distract them. Rhodey and Stephen both saw this, and for the sake of Gamora, they let it slide.

“Yesterday he put some kind of breadcrumb coating on poultry. It was delicious,” Gamora said. Tony’s jaw dropped.

“You made her momma’s fried chicken?” Tony asked Rhodey, faux stricken. “Just… Just tell me there are leftovers,” Tony said pitiably. Rhodey rolled his eyes.

“What? You think I’m some troglodyte who makes only as much as he needs? Last I knew, this was still fuckin’ America, and there is no shortage of food. Copious leftovers are in the fridge… Are… Do you even need to eat?” Rhodey asked.

“No,” Tony said. “But I got a bunch of new code to play with that could probably replicate the process. Which I totally need to dig into, but I have a few other things I need to handle first. However, the one I did have installed basically means I have a sense of smell… And I wanna smell Momma Rhodes’ fried chicken,” Tony said and started off for the kitchen, offering Gamora his arm as he went. She took it with a trusting, easy smile, and went with him.

“Where did you get code to emulate bodily functions?” Rhodey asked.

“Not to get too Addams Family about it, but it was Death. She’s pretty bad ass,” Tony called over his shoulder as he and Gamora vanished around the corner.

Stephen looked amused by Tony’s antics, and Rhodey decided to follow that lead. The sound of the fridge door opening came from the kitchen. “I can smell it from here!” Tony called out loudly. Stephen snorted.

“He’s like a kid with a new toy,” Rhodey observed.

“Does that surprise you?” Stephen asked.

“Not in the slightest,” Rhodey replied. Stephen chuckled. “Did he really mean the whole thing about being in contact with Death?” Rhodey asked quietly.

“Yes,” Stephen said. “She… likes him. She wants him to remain here for now.”

“I… alright. Might need more of that explained to me later,” Rhodey said.

“If he plays coy about it, ask me what you want to know. I’ll try to explain what I understand of it,” Stephen assured. Rhodey gave him a respectful nod.

“Thank you,” Rhodey said.

“Oh my god! Even the leftovers smell like deep fried heaven!” Tony shouted from the kitchen and Gamora laughed. Both Rhodey and Stephen grinned at one another and started making their way to them. It was then that Rhodey thought he could get to like Stephen Strange.

“We need to figure out what to do with Rogers,” Rhodey said to Stephen, who nodded.

“I worry about his stability in the long term, and yet I’m unsure of what course of action to take,” Stephen said. “He’ll try it again. If he can find a way, he’ll try.”

“I think you two have taken some good steps. Destroying the platform and keeping the Time Stone away from him were important… So far as I can tell, Tony didn’t keep any notes after he proved the concept, other than some on paper, and he burned those once he had it up and going. He never explained the entire process to anyone. Not even Banner. Rightfully thought it was too dangerous,” Rhodey said.

“I’m relieved to know that,” Stephen said. “I trust him with it. But, no offence, no one else. Myself included, and I have the Time Stone.”

“Yeah, me too,” Rhodey agreed.

Tony and Gamora were making up plates for herself, Rhodey, and Stephen. Stephen could tell which one was his by the carefully sliced up chicken that he would be able to eat with a fork or chopsticks rather than having to endure the pain, or any tremors that lead to clumsiness, while holding a piece. He didn’t say anything, but found himself legitimately moved by the quiet accommodation to his reality. Gamora was doling out potato salad and coleslaw, and Tony was concocting that alien looking smoothie had for himself when Peter had been at the Sanctum. Rhodey was instantly curious about it. “What have you got going on there?” He asked.

“Replenishing smoothie. I need to give the nanobots straight raw materials every so often… However, with that recent upgrade in my code, it means I can do this.” Tony went over to the espresso machine, and took a double shot he’d put on off of it, and poured it into the blender. He hit the power, blended it up, and poured the contents over a glass that had ice in it. “Iced coffee, baby,” Tony declared triumphantly. Rhodey rolled his eyes, but smiled at him.

“You sure that’s not gonna mess you up?” He asked.

“Of course it won’t. I’m waterproof,” Tony said.

“I’ve seen him do this before, albeit without the coffee, and it was fine,” Stephen said casually. He smiled and looked charmed when Gamora set a fork beside the plate for him and gestured for him to sit at one of the stools at the counter.

“Mmm… coffee flavoured,” Tony said with a silly grin and took a sip. Stephen couldn’t help himself and laughed quietly. He hadn’t had much time to relish in the mirth Tony brought to his life when he’d been rushing through all those possible futures. Be damned if he wasn’t going to enjoy it now. He knew Tony could do this to him, but experiencing it in real time was one of the things that made everything worth it.

“Oh, you two are gonna be stupid for one another,” Rhodey observed with a grin. He sat down at his plate, shaking his head.

“Is that so bad?” Tony asked, surprising Rhodey with his sincere need for acceptance.

“No, Tony, it’s not bad at all. Maybe just be careful of Pepper for awhile,” Rhodey said.

“I have been,” Tony said. “She knows I’m interested in Stephen now. I had that chat with her last night. She seems okay with it, and grateful that I’m not angry at her for not being able to be with me. She and I are going to need to be honest about these things so we can co-parent Morgan effectively. Morgan doesn’t need to be keeping big secrets from her parents,” Tony explained.

Rhodey gave Tony another satisfied nod and started eating. Tony turned his focus to Gamora to see how she was getting on. “How ya keepin’?” He asked.

“I’m very well, Tony. I share James’ concerns about Rogers, however,” she said.

“We’ll cross that when we come to it, but I appreciate your concern. I’m pretty well protected against him for now. But I will remain wary of him, I promise,” Tony replied. He looked to Stephen and Rhodey when he’d said the word protected. “So long as he stays away from my family, I’ll be okay. If he doesn’t stay away from my family, then all bets are off.” Tony’s voice took a very serious, dark, turn. He sipped at his smoothie and his expression changed to one of contentment. “Remember, it’s his bullshit that basically made me into an overpowered synthetic ubermensch… Which, oh the irony of that… I’ll lay it out for him, nice and clear, that he needs to lay off. Don’t worry about that… Mmm… Coffee,” Tony said and hummed.

“Tony, I… Holy fuck, are you okay?” Rhodey asked. Tony sat down at the counter with the rest of them. There was silence from everyone else.

“All things considered, Jimmy, yes, I’m okay. Better than okay. I’m getting my life back,” Tony assured. “I’m just not shying away from my sometimes weird reality. I didn’t want this, exactly… But I didn’t want to leave more, so I have to accept some weird shit.”

“He has been talking about the depersonalization,” Stephen added softly. Tony gave Stephen a warm, grateful, smile.

“And when I’m back out in the world, I’ll be going back to therapy,” Tony promised. “Speaking of which, it’s going to be time for me to go public soon.”

“You ready for that?” Rhodey asked.

“Eh, I understand that it is a consequence of bringing some of the projects I have planned to fruition… I’m going to make the world see Elon Musk as the twerp he is,” Tony said.

“Seems a bit petty. He was dusted,” Rhodey said with a snort.

“It is. But I’m not proud. And he keeps on taking investment money and pissing it away. Any bright young thing engineer we’ve headhunted from him comes to S.I. with PTSD. We have to always make it clear to them to not take work home with them, or come in on weekends, and teach them that they will get royalties from anything they invent while on the job… I don’t like bad bosses, and I really don’t like conmen,” Tony said with a shrug. “Besides, I’d rather have that investment money for S.I., actually do something useful with it, and then we can give those investors a return on it… But I have big plans, gum drop. Things to improve real people’s lives. I want to spend my time doing that.”

“I… Alright, Tony. If that’s what you want, I’m here for it.” Rhodey said.

“I want to turn my eye to helping everyone on this planet. I want to be there for my family. If I have to go and do the hero thing, fine. But I’d rather shift focus away from that,” Tony said. Rhodey nodded in understanding.

“Who is Elon Musk?” Gamora asked.

“Inherited a bunch of money. Or at least enough of it to figure out how to make the American government rain down grant money on him. He’s using it to run businesses with big ideas and little else. He’s also a pain in my ass,” Tony said. “He passes himself off as a guy like me, but he doesn’t make good on those big ideas. I want to create power storage that would actually make his ideas a reality. But that would be an inadvertent side effect of creating something that would help people all over the world with power resource management. If he wants to use it for his ideas, he’s welcome to try. But since they lack efficiency in their projected outcomes, I can’t see that their other inherent issues will be fixed,” Tony summarized. “Heard from Quill?”

“He says they should be arriving the day after tomorrow. I think he’s pushing the rest of them to get here. I wish he wouldn’t, but I will be happy to see them all again,” she replied.

“Good,” Tony said. “Hey, FRIDAY, have we made preparations for our guests?”

“Yes, boss. Grocery order has been adjusted, rooms are cleaned and prepped here in this wing, and I’ve put in orders for raw materials to restock the Benetar,” FRIDAY said.

“Thank you so much, dear,” Tony said.

“You’re welcome… Hey, boss?” She asked.

“What is it, baby girl?” Tony asked.

“Vision… I’d like to speak with him if I’m able. I think there’s a lot I could learn from him,” FRIDAY said.

“We’ll set up a few play dates. He and Wanda are stashed safely for now. But when I first pinged his system, I felt this deep sense of loneliness. I think he’s gonna need all the A.I. pals he can get,” Tony said.

“I’d like that,” FRIDAY said. She’d always been intrigued by the idea of Vision, and knew a lot of what JARVIS had been. She aspired to that. Tony assured her that she would get there, but that she had to give it time and patience.

 

After their meal, Tony hardened himself mentally and made his way over to the residents’ quarters of the compound. Stephen asked Charles to inform Wong and the other Masters of his impending proximity to Steve Rogers, and told them to hold off for now.

They found them in their training facility, apparently sparring like old times. However, a deep sense of heavy reality hung in the air. There was not much banter among them. Bucky and Sam looked like they were decidedly not into it, and Rogers and Natasha looked like they were clinging to the routine for dear life.

Tony watched placidly for a moment, until Bucky swept Rogers off his feet and down to the mat hard. “Ah, shit, sorry,” Bucky said, though there wasn’t much contrition in his voice.

“S’okay, Buck. I’m fine,” Steve said, though he was slower to get to his feet than he might have been had everyone been in a better mood. Tony let him be up and steady before he addressed them.

“Rogers? A moment of your time, please?” Tony said. He didn’t need to be doing this, really. But he wanted to be absolutely clear with Rogers. He needed to know what the boundaries were.

“What do you need, Stark?” Steve asked. Tony held back his smile, but he was quietly delighted that Rogers was pissed off at him. At least he knew the stalking wasn’t from some misguided affection or something equally as ridiculous.

“A moment of your time,” Tony repeated. “In private.”

“Anything you have to say to me, they can hear it too,” Rogers declared. Tony sighed heavily and scrubbed his face with his palm, swallowing his knee-jerk annoyance and tried to channel it into something useful.

“Alright, ya know what? Fine. Stop stalking Rhodey. It’s getting creepy,” Tony said flat out. That brought the others to a complete stand still. “If you want to talk to me, my number is still the same. I won’t answer, but feel free to leave a voicemail. You might be able to annoy me into a response.”

“What does he mean by that?” Sam asked.

“He’s been following Rhodey around the compound. Been casually asking the rest of you to keep tabs on him too. Pretty sure it’s Captain Single-Bloody-Mindedness’ plan to try to get to me, and to get me to reconsider preserving the timeline. So, all of you need to leave Rhodey the hell alone. He is not the path to me. He doesn’t even know the address where I’m staying, technically. And the ‘captain’ needs to let this the fuck go.” Tony said, and then turned back to Steve while the other’s processed what he’d said.

“Rogers, you can be pissed off at me, hate me, blame me for your own failings and dropped threads all you want… But you need to leave those I care about alone. I’ve ruined people for smaller infractions. And it’s not something I grew out of when I gave up producing weapons. Get your head around the fact that your status here is still very fragile, and you need to fall the fuck in line, or there will be consequences now. There is no comfort of the world coming to an imminent end that will let you get away with shit now. So, this is your only warning. Leave Rhodey and everyone else I care about alone. He is not just a stepping stone on your path to… whatever the fuck it is you think you’re going to be able to do eventually. You need to move on, Steve. I’m sorry that things worked out shitty for you. But that isn’t a permanent thing. You can build something new, and worthwhile… Your best friends are right here in this room. This is isn’t a prison, it’s an opportunity to transcend what you thought you needed and find that you can be happy with a different kind of life. Finding grace where you are. But only by getting help, and moving on will you get there. This hyper-focus on the past isn’t healthy. The fact that Nicky ignored your obvious mental distress is disturbing. But, we have the Accords now. Help is readily available for your trauma. And there is no shame in getting help.”

You can help me,” Steve said petulantly.

“No. No I cannot. No I will not. There will be no bullying or pushing of me or anyone around me. Do you understand, Steven Grant Rogers? This is what we call a boundary. This is it. I’m laying one down on top of the foundation of the current laws regarding those like us. This is the warning. Next time, we call the fucking cops. And I’ve already taught them a few techniques to help them deal with you. If they can’t, then I call the sorcerers. Would you like another Mirror Dimension vacation? Don’t answer. I don’t care. I just want you to know the consequences,” Tony said. Thinking of Pepper the night before, he gave them his own shark like grin, all teeth and threat. “Behave yourselves, or you’re all out. That’s it. None of you are particularly special anymore. There are plenty out there who are better than you, and who are able to see reason. This bullshit stops. Immediately,” Tony said.

Rogers, true to his nature, raised his arm and made to throw a punch. Tony caught Rogers’ fist in his palm, and stopped Steve in his tracks with shock and the pain of his body not being able to follow through. Tony squeezed his fingers just enough for Rogers to register pain, and to show him that Tony couldn’t be moved thanks to his increased mass and strength that came with having a synthetic body. “This is exactly what I’m talking about.” Tony looked at Steve’s fist held suspended by Tony’s fingers. “This is assault, Steve,” Tony said calmly, but with that same shark grin. “I want you to know that I am this because of you. I was content to make my way in the world as a happy little disembodied artificial intelligence. But because of your selfishness, I had to do this to save the timeline. I didn’t want to be this, to be physically superior to you, but here we are, and we cannot go backwards. We. Cannot. Go. Backwards.” Tony then moved too fast for even Rogers to react to, grabbed his wrist, and swung it behind his back, threw him down to the mat and pinned him. “You just earned yourself a write-up and mandatory psych evaluation. Let’s see how that goes for you.” Tony then leaned in and whispered in Rogers’ ear. “Leave Rhodey and everyone else alone. This is your only warning.”

He then let him go, and got to his feet. “Any more shit from him, and not only is he done, so are the rest of you. No funding for your pet projects. No comfortable living conditions, medical insurance, and pension. No pleas from the public will gain you any sympathy. You will abide the Accords, and you will behave like adults. Got it?” Tony asked.

“Understood,” Sam said, thinking of his sister’s family. Bucky nodded. Natasha looked uncertain, with a tinge of fear at the corners of her eyes.

“Good. I’m reporting this incident, and your behaviour towards Rhodey to your Accords Liaison. Get your shit together.” Tony turned on his heel, turning his back on them as if he hadn’t a care in the world, and made for the door, flanked by Rhodey and Stephen. Stephen was glad for his ceremonial robes as they hid the half-stalk he was sporting thanks to Tony’s self-assured manner. It had been fucking hot to watch. Oh sure, he could go on about how proud he was of Tony, and he was, but he wasn’t going to deny that he found it extremely appealing. He’d have to thank him for the demonstration later.

Notes:

Boundaries, amirite? They're sexy AF. Stephen knows this. Sorry that Tony said fuck so much. He was feeling expressive.

Speaking of: Fuck Elon Musk. If you want a good breakdown of his dumbfuckery, check out the channel AdamSomething on YouTube. Best summary I've seen so far.

So, remember that whole, do I have ADHD thing? Yeah, turns out I have like, 6 of the 8 major factors of it... 40 fucking years old, and I finally have an answer. My GP was stunned, and I just shrugged because I wasn't surprised that it had been missed up to here. Someone hand me my Oscar for best ongoing method acting performance in masking. I had a second cousin in my classes growing up in the 80's and 90's, and he had violent outbursts due to his ADHD (I remember one where he was kicking desks over... Another incident a couple years later where he was hitting our teacher with his arm that he had in a cast). So, it's no surprise to me, that as the chatty kid, who otherwise didn't cause many problems, I was just shuffled to the back of the classroom to annoy my teachers less.

I have started a stimulant medication. Been on it for just over 30 days now. And honestly, it's kind of awesome? It's not a panacea. I'm not a zombie, or a perfectly organized drone now by any means. What I really love? The ability to emotionally regulate. The ability to not take shit so personally. The ability to realize that if someone has a bad reaction, or is a piece of shit to me, it's on them. It's likely nothing I did, as I do actively try to be a decent person. It's stopped me running those doomsday scenarios in my head for the most part. It took awhile, and I had a few rough days (including a brutal sleepless night where my brain wouldn't turn the fuck off), but as a good friend of mine (who also is an adult female with ADHD and takes Ritalin every day) said: "Yeah, that's just your brain fighting to keep its old coping mechanisms. Don't let it win." And she was right. I kept up with the medication. It's taken a few weeks, but I can actually tell my brain to hakuna its tatas, and by gar, it mostly works now... And yeah, that seems like it should be trivial, right? Not so in my brain. I'm great at compartmentalizing because of the need to just get on with shit in my life, but now I can better see where or if I have caused a negative reaction in someone. If anything, I feel more emotionally aware than before. I'm just not overwhelmed by it.

Unexpectedly, cravings for junk food have gone down, which is another surprising thing, though I still need to develop better food habits. But my brain isn't screaming for serotonin all the time now, so it makes sense. My anxiety has gone way the fuck down, and the depression that came with it is abating... So yeah, that's a thing. I still have a long fucking way to go. I may need to increase the dosage, and definitely need to research better coping habits, but for now, I will take this kind of relief. I've been needing it for probably literally 40 years now.

Notes:

Comments are love... :)