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It was early, as David stared at his bedraggled self in the mirror of his and Patrick’s bathroom. His hair was a mess and there was an angry red bruise on his neck from where he had begged Patrick to bite him last night during sex. It was expertly placed so it was just below David’s sweater collar, but the slightest tug would expose the mark to the world. He pressed his fingers into it, watching how the color barely changed. He smiled.
Patrick had been… reluctant, to say the least, when David had asked him to bite him. He was game for hickeys so long as they were able to be covered, and David had lost count of the number of times Patrick had left bruises from grabbing his hips while he fucked him. And Patrick himself liked to be marked, too, especially when David’s blunt fingernails scraped down his back leaving red welts. When David had asked him to bite him, Patrick had hesitated.
“Are you sure?” Patrick asked, his eyes dark with lust.
Bless.
“I’m positive,” David assured him. He clenched down on Patrick’s cock inside him to emphasize his point. “Bite me, Patrick.”
And bite him Patrick had. It was beautiful.
“Good morning, babe,” Patrick said sleepily as he trudged into the bathroom. He wrapped his arms around David’s waist and dropped a kiss on his unbitten shoulder.
“Um, good morning yourself,” David replied. Their eyes met in the mirror. He was unable to hide the excitement he felt over this bruise on his shoulder.
“That looks really bad,” Patrick said.
“Mm, it does, but it’s perfect.”
Patrick’s brow was furrowed as he stepped back from David to grab his toothbrush.
“What? What’s wrong?” David asked.
“It’s just… It looks like it hurts. And you know I don’t like hurting you.”
David gave him a soft smile as he gently rubbed Patrick’s biceps.
“Okay, so I do know that, but I asked for it. I like being bitten.” Patrick didn’t look convinced. “Especially when it’s you biting me.”
“Well, I hope no one else is biting you.”
“Well, Alexis did, but that was because she’s a greedy monster,” David said offhandedly before getting back to Patrick’s concern. “Just consider this to be a door that is always open. You can bite me whenever you feel comfortable. Well, preferably during sex. Please don’t bite me in front of our customers.”
He saw the corner of Patrick’s mouth twitch.
“Hm, shame. That’s exactly when I was planning on doing it,” Patrick teased.
“Mm, okay,” David said, turning to his creams beside the sink. He was happy Patrick felt comfortable enough to tease him about it, but he was still teasing him about it.
“Though it could be an effective employee training tactic,” he continued. “I’ll bite you when we get a customer complaint about something you did.” David turned to face him.
“Um, so, I know you’re joking, but if that’s when you plan on biting me, you might be reenforcing bad behavior.”
Patrick gave him a small smile.
“Noted.”
The day progressed as many of their days did. They opened the store, restocked product, and cleaned, all while customers milled about. It was any ordinary Wednesday.
David loved that he had this little secret lurking beneath his collar. He found himself touching it absently as he talked with customers or got lost in thought during the lulls. It was so different from the dozens of hickeys Patrick had given him over the years. The pain had been so sharp and definitive as opposed to hickeys that seemed to blossom over time. God, and Patrick hammered into him too, his body practically folded in half so Patrick could fuck him as deeply as possible.
“David?” Patrick touched his elbow, snapping him out of his trance.
“Hm? Yes?” he answered, his voice still far away. Thankfully there was no one else in the store so if he needed to take care of things, he could. (And hopefully drag his husband back there with him…)
“Did you put the sea mist hairspray out earlier?”
“I did.”
“Okay, then we must’ve sold out. I knew I should’ve asked Harriet for a bigger order this week. They are selling really well…”
Patrick trailed off as the doorbell jingled. Both of them glanced over to the door to see who it was and oh.
The customer was a gorgeous, chiseled, tan man who looked as if he’d stepped right out of a Gucci photoshoot. David would recognize those clothes anywhere. Everything was perfectly fitted; even his shoes looked custom-made. And his dark hair was perfectly quaffed atop his head.
The man waved at them courteously before turning to peruse the hand creams. David looked up to Patrick to make a comment, but Patrick was already moving away from the counter to approach the customer.
“Can-can I help you find something?” Patrick asked.
“Um, no, I think I’m good for right now,” the man replied. God, even his voice was sexy. Deep, with a smooth timbre, perfect for midnight radio. “But thank you.”
“Sure, sure,” Patrick replied. “Just, uh, let us know if you need anything.”
Patrick lingered for a second before the man looked up and said, “You know, actually, yes. My cuticles - I just started a job that has me driving long distances, and my nail-biting habit has apparently returned. Do you have anything for that?”
David watched bitterly as Patrick inspected the man’s cuticles, then led him to the far corner where the cuticle creams were. It wasn’t often that a model-level attractive man came in to the store, and David guessed it was Patrick’s turn to help out the hot customer.
It’s just… this was bothering him more than usual? Patrick was all flustered and stuttering like he had when he and David had started dating. Now he could get sentences like, ‘I want to lick my cum out of your ass.’ and ‘I need your cock inside me, David.’ without a second thought. Yet he was getting shy and blushing at this guy who looked like he should be on a CW drama.
Then it dawned on him: this guy looked like a hotter, sexier David.
Dark hair carefully sculpted up and back. A fitted and sophisticated sweater with the sleeves pushed up, revealing his muscled and veiny forearms. Skinny jeans that were clearly meant to show off his package (which, okay, David at least had him beat in that department). Loafers that were sensible yet stylish. Worse yet: he had thicker eyebrows, too.
Basically if David took everything about himself and turned it up to 11.
And Patrick was flirting with him.
He couldn’t blame Patrick. In all honesty, David would have done the same thing and Patrick would’ve been by the counter being bitter about David flirting with another guy. It’d be his housewarming party all over again. Besides, they were married. Patrick had made his decision and never once did David think he was going to leave him. Not like there were many other options in Schitt’s Creek. Who would he date? Jake? Please.
But it gnawed at David’s stomach. Did Patrick wish he looked more like that? He’d lost a few pounds recently, but never in his life had he ever been able to see the veins in his forearms. He’d always had a stubborn bit of fat on his stomach and his thighs were huge. His jaw couldn’t cut glass like that guy’s could. The customer was basically Dorito-shaped whereas David just ate a lot of Doritos.
He pressed on the bruise hard, sending spikes of pain up his neck.
The guy picked up the cream Patrick recommended and both men headed over to the register where David was zoning out.
“Yeah, and that’ll last you for like, forever,” Patrick said to the guy. He was usually so much more eloquent than this.
“Great,” the customer replied, flashing his thousand-watt smile. God, his teeth were blinding.
“David can ring you up right here.” Patrick patted the countertop next to the small jar of cuticle cream and smiled at David.
David cleared his throat and finally looked directly at the man. He really was gorgeous, definitely someone David would’ve tried to sleep with in his previous life. Now, he just wanted him to leave his store and stop making him feel bad about how much of a disappointment he was to his husband.
“That’ll be fourteen dollars,” David said.
The man gave him his card, forcing David to be near him longer. He could smell him. He had on some sort of woodsy cologne that obviously Patrick liked given his penchant for wandering in the woods when he needed to think.
“Is that Hermes?” the man asked, gesturing to David’s sweater.
“Um, yes,” David answered. “Yes it is.” No one but his own family had ever been able to properly identify his clothes on sight before. This one had a lovely floral pattern on the sleeves.
“I thought I recognized it. I have one just like it at home.”
“Hm!” David pursed his lips and raised his eyebrows. Was this man sent to kill him and assume his identity?
“Nice to see someone out here in the sticks with some fashion sense,” the man said with a chuckle.
“You know, our walk-in closet is full of sweaters like this,” Patrick chimed in. “One of the first things I noticed about him.” The soft look Patrick gave him only partly made up for whatever he’d done earlier.
“Well, it looks great on you,” the man said kindly.
“Thank you,” David said, even though he really wanted to say, but I bet it would look better on you.
He handed the card back to the customer. He needed to leave the store before David had a chance to feel even worse about himself.
“Alright, well, it was nice meeting you, Patrick,” the man said, holding his hand out for a handshake. “My fingers are already grateful for the sample. My girlfriend will be even more grateful.” Both men laughed. “Have a great day, both of you.”
With that, the man left.
Patrick stuffed his hands deep in his pockets and leaned against the counter. He let out a long exhale.
“Was he gorgeous or what?” he said as they watched the man drive off in his BMW.
“Mm, yeah,” David replied. He tried to sound unimpressed, but seeing as he was trying to fool his husband, it didn’t work.
“Okay, what’s going on?”
“Hm? Nothing.” Patrick gave him a look.
“David.”
David fretted for a moment before finally settling on what he should say.
“Okay, don’t you find it interesting that you were drooling over what would clearly be me if I had a Crossfit membership?” he said in a rush before clamping his mouth shut and putting his fist on his hip. He watched as the tips of Patrick’s ears turned red.
“What? No...” Patrick said bashfully. He knew he was caught. “Okay, maybe.”
David inhaled sharply. Patrick hurried around the counter to pull him into his arms.
“Hey,” Patrick said gently as David draped his arms over his shoulders. “You know I love how you look.”
“Yeah, obviously. You got to see how I would look if I were an eleven,” David quipped. Patrick gave him another look.
“Look, I might have a type-”
“-oh, that’s evident-”
“- but I love you, in everything that you are,” he said earnestly, squeezing David’s back for emphasis. Then, dropping his voice, “Besides, I love what this body can do to me…”
Now it was David’s turn to blush. He averted his gaze. Patrick was just saying that to be nice, to make him feel better about being the ‘before’ photo to that guy’s ‘after’. He didn’t need to butter him up.
“Including falling asleep on top of you and putting your arm to sleep?” David said. It was too uncomfortable to simply agree with Patrick on this.
“Mm, especially then.”
Patrick kissed him tenderly. David loved his husband more than anyone else on the planet, but even he couldn’t make him feel better about his body. And now that Patrick had seen what David could look like with a little more muscle and a little less salted caramel swirl ice cream, David knew he’d never be Patrick’s perfect fantasy.
The day dragged on. Now with David’s insecurities at full throttle, it was difficult for him to focus on much else. Everything he did reminded him of what he could look like if he went to the gym seven times a week and ate nothing but healthy food. His jaw would be more rugged, his ass wouldn’t be so big, he’d be able to lift heavy boxes without struggling. Hell, even his fingers would be skinnier.
It was a long day for David. His bite mark was long forgotten by closing time.
For what it was worth, Patrick was extra affectionate, likely in an attempt to make up for fawning over the customer who looked so eerily similar to David. He gave David cheek kisses and neck kisses at every opportunity. He had heart eyes all day.
God, he’d married the right man.
Finally - finally! - they got home from work and dinner. Patrick had surprised David by driving them to David’s favorite Chinese restaurant out in Elmdale. While David appreciated his wonderfully thoughtful and apologetic husband, he now felt bloated from eating too much and all he could think about was how Improved Clone David wouldn’t have eaten a whole second plate of potstickers.
The rest of the night David tried to hide his sulking. He didn’t want Patrick to think he was still mad at him for the whole ordeal with the customer. They were well beyond that. Instead, all of that frustration turned inward, making David wonder why Patrick was even physically attracted to him in the first place.
Before bed, David found himself in front of the full length mirror in their bathroom. He stared hard at his reflection, as if he were waiting to see his body transform into the hotter, thinner, fitter version of himself. Strangely, it didn’t happen.
He tugged at his collar to see the bite Patrick gave him last night already fading away. It saddened him that something that brought him such joy this morning now felt like a consolation prize. Patrick was just being nice and doing what was asked of him, probably imagining David"s neck to be more defined as he sunk his teeth in.
He lifted his t-shirt to see his stomach which was still very full of Chinese food. He was hairy, thick dark hair that covered much of his chest, starting at his collarbone and going all the way past his waistband. It was something he’d learned to live with since settling in Schitt’s Creek. The closest waxing salon was in Elm Valley, easily a two-hour round-trip drive, not counting the appointment itself. The drive wasn’t worth it, especially when the result only reminded him of his sad, pathetic love life before they had lost their money. And with the store, he was too busy to fit it into his schedule, so Patrick had never gotten to see him completely bare. A travesty, really. The customer probably waxed regularly so he didn"t look like Wolfman"s cousin.
He lightly sucked in his stomach, then pressed two fingers into the soft pudge that stubbornly remained. David wasn’t fat by anyone’s standards but his own. Still, he’d never seen his own abs, even on his best day.
He frowned. Patrick deserved someone who looked better than he did.
“David, what are you doing?”
David whipped around to look at his husband who was leaning against the doorframe in his pajamas. He shamefully tugged down his shirt.
“Hm? Oh, nothing,” he lied. He hurriedly returned to the bathroom sink and started opening his creams and lotions, pretending like Patrick didn"t just catch him. “I wasn’t doing anything.”
Patrick stepped closer to pull David into his arms, giving him a knowing look through the mirror. David could feel against his back how his husband was in much better shape than he was. His self-consciousness took a nosedive when Patrick opened his hands against David"s belly. All that undefined blahness right in his palms.
“I told you, I love your body,” Patrick said tenderly. His earnest expression was hard to look at when David felt so undeserving of such affection.
“You don’t have to say that,” he murmured.
“I know, but I want to. Because it’s true.”
David didn’t respond. If Patrick insisted on feeding him this white lie to make him feel better, there wasn’t anything he could do to stop him.
Patrick’s head tilted as he gave David a considering look.
“You don’t believe me,” he said curiously.
“Um,” David said as he stared at his under-eye serum in his hand, trying to find his answer. “It’s not that I don’t believe you. It"s more that you’re my husband and you’re supposed to say things like that.”
"It"s not a requirement of marriage, you know."
"Well then, you should ask JLo the real reason she and Marc Anthony divorced."
“And you think I married you just for your personality?” Patrick asked incredulously.
“Okay,” he replied defensively, turning around to face him. “That is a very confusing statement. I would hope that you-”
Patrick cut him off with a searing kiss. He shoved him against the counter and his hands gripped David’s back, pulling him even closer. It surprised David, but he was never going to be one to say no to kissing his husband. He cupped Patrick’s cheek and encouraged him to take more. Patrick was hot and commanding, and groaned when their tongues touched.
Without breaking the kiss, Patrick walked David backward out of the bathroom and into their adjoining bedroom. He couldn’t stop kissing David. His hands slid under David’s shirt to grab at his skin. He was even so bold as to dive a hand beneath David’s waistband and dig his fingers into the meat of his ass. David gasped against Patrick’s lips. Oh, he loved when his husband’s possessive side came out to play.
Patrick drew David’s pajama pants down over his semi-hard cock and let them drop to pool at his feet. David reached down to do the same to his husband, when Patrick’s hands stopped him.
“No,” he said firmly against his lips. David recoiled. Patrick must"ve felt it, because he quickly added, "Not yet."
His hands moved to the hem of David’s shirt and yanked it over his head. Now, David was standing completely naked while Patrick was fully clothed. It wouldn’t have been strange had Patrick not stopped him from undressing him.
“Lay down on your back,” Patrick commanded. He took a step back, finally breaking their kiss. David was in a daze. He didn’t know what was going on. But he did as he was told and climbed onto the bed.
In the few seconds he was away from Patrick, the dissatisfaction with his body set in again. It was one thing to be naked with Patrick, but he was now literally on display in his post-two-plates-of-potstickers state. It was humiliating. He wanted to hide.
Yet Patrick stood at the foot of the bed, staring at him. His dark, hungry eyes raked down David’s body slowly, drinking in every centimeter of skin laid out before him. As his eyes got lower and closer to David’s groin, he started to palm himself over his pajama pants. Then, when they reached his thighs, Patrick took in a sharp shuddering breath.
God, why was his husband hard and staring at him, when he could be hard and on top of him! Just as David opened his mouth to tell him that, Patrick spoke.
“Before we were dating, I tried to picture what you looked like under your clothes,” he said, his voice thick with desire. “We hadn’t hugged and I couldn’t tell from looking at you, what was under your sweaters. So when I thought about you, I pictured what that customer looked like. Because I didn’t know.” David was about to roll his eyes, but Patrick whined and his hand went into his pants to fist his cock. He couldn"t look away. “But fuck, David, the first time you took off your shirt, hngh, I realized my fantasies never measured up. And when I finally saw you naked? Jesus fucking Christ, David, it took everything in my power to not cum immediately.”
Oh.
Patrick had never told him that before.
"I"d watched porn and it didn"t do anything for me. And then I got to touch you and, fuck, have sex with you, and god, I knew I was fucking a man." Patrick growled on the last word and sent a shiver down David"s spine.
David arched his back slightly and his legs opened. Fuck, it was so much to be stared at like that, so hungrily. His body ached with need, his cock hard and straining against his stomach. He took his cock in hand and squeezed.
“I fucking love your body, David. I want to bury my face in your chest hair, I want to lick it until it’s straight. Love how soft your belly is when it rubs against my cock. I love licking my cum off your stomach. Your hips are perfect for me to grab when I fuck your ass. Oh, fuck, your ass is perfect. God, the way your ass looks when you’re on all fours, waiting for me to fuck you… And then, hngh, fuck, your thighs, David. Your fucking thighs…” Patrick let out another whine. His hand was flying on his dick, now out of his pants, as he stared at David’s thighs. “They’re so fucking thick and strong, god, love grabbing them when you ride me, love how they wrap around me when I fuck you…”
David was nearly in tears, it was so much. His mind flashed back to all the times they’d had sex, how Patrick looked at him or touched him in those areas, and now he knew why Patrick grabbed him a little harder or stared a little longer. It wasn’t a line.
“Patrick…” David whispered pleadingly. It was all the permission Patrick needed to drop his pants, climb onto the bed, and crawl on top of him. David widened his legs, accepting Patrick between his thighs (“love how they wrap around me when I fuck you…” ) as he reached up to kiss him desperately. David pulled at his t-shirt; he needed it off. Patrick obeyed, letting him remove it, but he didn’t return to his lips.
Instead, he traveled south, kissing down his chest, right into the thicket of dark hair. He inhaled deeply and moaned before licking at the hair. (“I want to bury my face in your chest hair…” ) David hadn’t showered that night, so he smelled musky, something Patrick couldn’t get enough of. David threaded his fingers through Patrick’s hair, encouraging him to kiss and smell and lick as much as he wanted.
Patrick raked his blunt nails down David’s sides to his hips (“...perfect for me to grab when I fuck your ass…” ) before his lips moved further down to his belly. He moved David’s cock just so he could kiss and lavish the soft skin with his tongue. (“...love licking my cum off your stomach…” ) He kissed across his belly from one side to the other, leaving no inch of David"s stomach untouched. David had leaked a bit of pre-cum, which Patrick greedily lapped up. He briefly sucked the head of his cock into his mouth, if only to get more of a taste.
Patrick stopped and sat up a bit. He lifted David’s legs so he could settle between them. David watched Patrick’s face as he slowly lowered them down so Patrick’s head was surrounded by his thighs.
Patrick was in absolute bliss.
“These fucking thighs…” Patrick mumbled before he turned his face to kiss and lick the sensitive skin of David’s inner thigh, starting from mid-thigh and working all the way up to his pubis. He trailed his lips along the crease of his thigh, mouthing delicately at the base of his cock, before moving to his other leg. David"s muscles quaked from the attention despite Patrick"s hands on the back of his folded knees, propping him open.
David felt fuzzy and dizzy from watching his husband explore his body like this. He’d never heard anyone, even Patrick, talk about or touch his thighs like this. His thighs, a part of his body he hated, were being utterly and divinely worshiped by his husband like Heaven was located between his legs.
Then, a sharp sensation shot up David’s body, making him gasp loudly, forcing his back to arch further as he gripped the pillow beneath his head.
Patrick had bit his thigh. Hard.
“Oh, fucking Christ,” David choked out as Patrick bit and sucked harder. He was wound tighter than a bowstring, his eyes squeezed shut and toes curling. He could barely breathe, barely move. He felt the sharpness of Patrick"s incisors pinch and spear his skin, and the harder he bit down, the better it felt. David"s body was alight and on fire. He wanted more, but he didn’t want to cum. He didn’t want this to end.
Patrick released his thigh to look at his handiwork. There was a big red mark and a perfect dental record of Patrick’s teeth in his skin. And before David could say anything, Patrick turned his head and bit his other thigh.
David screamed.
“Patrick, Patrick!” he sobbed. Patrick bit and sucked harder, and David could feel the blood vessels bursting beneath his skin. He was being branded by Patrick"s mouth.
Then, with the faintest brush of Patrick’s fingertips over his balls, David choked up and in an instant, he came hard, completely untouched.
His whole body was thrumming, like his blood was molten lava. He’d never cum that hard before.
He clawed at Patrick’s head and shoulders; he needed to kiss him now.
“C’mere, c’mere,” he murmured desperately. Patrick looked up at him from between his thighs, his lips red and shiny and oh, if David could take a photo. He was the picture of pure debauchery.
Patrick climbed up David’s body where he was met with a fiery kiss. He was starving for his husband’s lips and body on his, the body Patrick loved so very much. He wrapped his legs around Patrick, the bite marks pressed perfectly against his hip bones.
“Fuck me, baby,” David begged as he dug his fingers into Patrick’s lower back, urging him to thrust against him harder and faster. “Cum on my belly. Come on. Fuck me, fuck me.”
“I’m gonna fucking cum on your perfect belly,” Patrick growled, his hips snapping fast and dirty. “Fucking sexy body, wanna fuck you all the time, fucking thighs-- oh, oh, fuck!” He squeezed David’s hip hard, his fingernails biting into David’s skin, as he came onto David’s hairy stomach.
His hips stuttered as he slowed down, and David dragged him in for a long, lazy kiss. Once their hearts had stopped racing, Patrick pulled back and sat up on his knees between David’s legs. It gave both of them a better view of David’s chest, which looked like a crude Jackson Pollock. Streaks of his own cum reached close to his nipples, and Patrick’s lingered near the bottom of his sternum.
David dropped his head back on the pillow, smiling. Any moment, Patrick would get out of bed and retrieve a washcloth to clean him up, and then they could kiss some more.
...Except he didn’t. Patrick ran his hands up David’s thighs as he lowered himself back down to lick up the cum decorating David’s chest hair.
Of course.
“I don’t know why I thought you’d get a washcloth after all that,” David said, still grinning.
Patrick chuckled as he made his way to the middle of David’s chest.
“I don’t think I’ve ever cum that hard before,” he mused while Patrick continued to clean him.
“Honeymoon?” Patrick interjected between licks.
“Mm, true,” David agreed. There was one night on their honeymoon in Aruba where Patrick whispered his wedding vows in David’s ear as he rode him. David held Patrick on his cock for what felt like an eternity as he came deep inside him. “This was easily top three.” He paused. "I should probably stop ranking them because I don"t think it"s fair to the gentle orgasms you"ve given me. They"re just as good."
Patrick shook his head with a smile before he flopped onto the bed beside him.
“So, do you believe me now?” he asked David.
David bit his lip and nodded.
“I believe you,” he answered softly.
Patrick craned his neck up for another quick kiss. He curled up next to David, pressing his body against his side and resting his cheek on his shoulder. He ran his fingers through David’s chest hair, fluffing it up then combing it back down. They were quiet for a minute, just watching Patrick trace shapes in his hair.
“I’m glad you stopped waxing,” Patrick said. “This is all so sexy.” He threaded his fingers through the thickest area of hair and tugged gently to emphasize.
“Well, it’s certainly saving me a three-hour trip once a week,” David said.
“Mm, good. More time with me.”
“Mhm.”
David’s thighs throbbed. He opened his legs so he could get a better look at the damage Patrick had done and oh, those were hefty bite marks. They made the one on his neck look like the first hickey he tried to give Patrick in their early days of dating. He was going to be feeling them for a while.
“So,” David began. Patrick looked up at him. “If I recall correctly, this morning you said you didn’t want to bite me, yet it looks like my thighs were attacked by a very short vampire.” Patrick laughed.
“Well, I guess I needed to bite you in the right place, then,” he said cheekily. “Your neck is nice, but this short vampire loves your sexy, sexy thighs.” He skimmed his fingers over one of the marks and pressed gently on the tender skin. David inhaled sharply at the new dull pain radiating from the pressure point. He couldn’t wait to press on the marks for the next few days.
He wanted to thank Patrick for showing him he wasn’t lying when he said he loved David’s body, but gratitude was not something he was particularly adept at.
“I’m glad you married me for the whole package and not just my alluring personality,” he said softly. Patrick smiled.
“I’d do it again in a heartbeat,” he replied. “I think you’re beautiful, David. And so, so sexy just the way you are.”
“I love you.”
“I love you, too.” Patrick paused. “And David?”
“Hm?”
“I’m glad you married me for the whole package and not just because I’m a hot piece of ass.”
David burst out laughing. He rolled onto his side so he could kiss his hot piece-of-ass husband properly.