Work Text:
"M-Marco."
Someone was poking my side. I yawned as I rolled over to see golden amber eyes shining in the darkness. I smiled softly and patted him on the top of his two-toned hair. His undercut was out of place and he looked absolutely adorable.
"What is it, Jean?" I asked quietly.
He reached for my hand and tugged at it softly, "We gotta go. Come on."
I blinked, maybe I was just having a dream, "Jean, we're gonna wake someone up. Let's just go back to sleep, okay?"
"Marco. I really need to show you something. Please," his voice cracked.
"Okay," I smiled, trying to hold back a laugh.
I sat up silently from my cot and went for my shoes. Jean shook his head and ushered me to hurry up.
"Our socks are gonna get dirty," I whispered.
"Don't worry about our stupid socks, Marco. I'll do the laundry on Wednesday," he scoffed, I saw the tiniest of smiles form as he turned away slightly.
I nodded and almost squeaked out of happiness when he laced his fingers with mine. Now I was fully awake and it was as if I didn't even. . .exist anymore. My whole body felt like it was on fire. I felt like the sun; full of warmth and always burning. Jean opened the front door and all the lights hit me at once.
Thousands and thousands of shooting stars.
It was like the sky was a canvas and the shooting stars were paint. Someone was using their paintbrush to bring light to the dark canvas. It was the most beautiful thing I have ever seen. I looked over at Jean, who was already staring at me, delight on his face. I felt my face heat up and I squeezed his hand a little tighter. His amber eyes didn't appear to be full of anger like usual, they reminded me of honey.
"Come on. There's this great spot in the forest to watch," he licked his lips and cracked a tiny smile.
The whole time he held my hand as I looked up at the sky. Once in a while he'd stop me from bumping into a tree or tripping over a rock. I felt very safe with Jean. He's a good leader and he made sure I wouldn't get hurt. Maybe he could be the commander of the Military Police one day. We could live together side by side and I could kiss him everyday.
"Here," no matter how hard he tried, his voice was full of happiness.
We sat down a patch of clovers with flowers scattered around. I picked one and tucked it behind Jean's ear. The look on his face was so priceless. First, he tensed up. Then he became relaxed and had a tint of pink on his cheeks. I couldn't help but stroke his cheek with thumb. I placed a small and tentative kiss where my thumb had stroked, and that really caught his attention. He stood up quickly and looked down at me with an expression I couldn't read.
My chest began to feel heavy and my eyes stung.
"I'm-"
Jean cut me off, "H-Happy Birthday, Marco."
My puzzled expression must have been pretty funny because he actually laughed at me, "T-Thanks, Jean."
He licked his lips and scratched the back of his head, "Marco. . .is it alright that I, er, give you your present?"
I nodded and smiled, "Of course, silly!"
"Close your eyes," he instructed.
I obeyed his wish and shut my eyes. I heard a bit of rustling around and Jean let out a sigh. He was so close that I felt his breathe hit my face and his smell filled the air. It hit me, he was right in front of me. Oh dear, dear, dear, Wall Sina. He's in front of me oh my gosh. He sat down between my legs and wrapped his arms around my neck; I kept my eyes closed.
"Happy Birthday, Marco."
He kissed me. He kissed me. He kissed me.
I opened my eyes and saw bright embers in his eyes. This is bliss. This is so much more than I could ever ask for. I rested my hands on his waist and leaned in. As soon as his eyes closed, I closed mine too and I was back into our endless bliss. I held on to Jean like my life depended on it and he began to run his fingers through my hair. I let out a tiny moan and Jean did shortly after. We continued to kiss and he softly pushed me back so I was laying in the soft clover patch.
It felt like I was in heaven.
My legs found their way around his waist and he was slightly moving closer and closer to me, causing our lower halves to touch and more moans from me. His tongue grazed across my lower lip and I hummed. My fingers were in his hair and his hands were under my shirt. I felt him smile while we were kissing. He slowly pulled away and his lips were shining from the kiss. I licked mine and smiled.
"Thank you, Jean. Thank you so much," I said quietly, stroking a piece of hair on his forehead to the side.
He leaned down and planted a small kiss on my neck and said, "You're welcome."
By that time, all the shooting stars were gone. Jean and I were all alone in our own perfect world. I felt so safe with my arms wrapped around him and his lips on mine. I could drown in him; I don't think I could ever get tired of kissing Jean.
He was like a drug that I could never give up.
"You know," he smiled, kissing my nose. "Your freckles are. . .they remind me of stars. You're like a galaxy I want to explore, Marco."
I blushed and pulled him closer to my lips, my heart absolutely pounding, "Then why don't you get lost inside me?"
He smiled deviously at me and bit at my bottom lip, his hand trailing lower and lower than my body, "Gladly."
*
I don't know why I'm thinking about this now, but as the titan is lifting me up from the ground, I realized that maybe I should have told him I loved him more. I should have let him hold my hand more and I made sure he knew how much I love him. I wish I could still be with him. I wish we just ran away. Maybe. . .maybe I should have ran away. The titan growled, don't fucking say that, Marco!
That night was the best damn night in my whole short life. It was all too ironic for my comfort zone. With some help from Armin I actually ended up finding out the name of the flower I tucked behind Jean's ear: forget-me-not.
Clovers are symbols for luck, so maybe I would be lucky if Jean never forgot me.
My sobs and quiet pleading were put to rest and I felt my whole body being ripped in half. All I could think about was Jean. He was all I could think about since that night and now he would also be the last. Everything was fading out quickly.
My mother told me my freckles were kisses from angels, so maybe I could give Jean some freckles soon.
"Close your eyes," he instructed.
I did and they never opened again.