Chapter Text
He has a few blessed moments of silence before Barry comes stumbling into the bay. Literally. Len rolls his eyes because somehow he’s fallen in love with the fucking clumsiest superhero in history. His luck is just…A fucking plus.
Barry stops in the doorway, managing to look both awkwardly out of place and like he wants to rip Len a new one. They stare at each other for a few beats before Len grows impatient and gestures towards the knocked over stool.
He wants to make a witty remark but honestly doesn’t know how many breaths he has left. Better save them for the good shit.
Barry picks up the stool easily and rights it, putting it down a lot closer to Len than it was before. He sits down gingerly, settling in with his feet up in the lowest rung and hands clasped between his knees. Between his illegally long legs.
Focus. Really not the time.
He sighs and moves to take off the bracelet that’s dosing him, thinking he should probably be more clearheaded for this conversation than he currently is.
“I strongly recommend against that, Mr. Snart.” He pauses, fingers hovering over the clasp. He raises an eyebrow at the ceiling. “You cannot currently tell, but you are in an immense amount of pain. If you wish to talk or to even stay conscious, I highly suggest you let me continue treating you.” He stays frozen for a few more seconds before sighing and relaxing against the chair.
“Fine. Door closed, Gideon. Please.” The doors slide closed with the distinct sound of them sealing.
It’s uncomfortably quiet in the bay as Len stares at the opposite wall and taps his fingers, wanting to avoid this conversation as much as possible but not having any time left. He’s loving the irony.
Barry waits him out, patiently, and he really must look like shit if now Barry is sitting still.
He purses his lips and clenches his fist. Okay. Like a bandaid.
“I’m dying, Barry.” He still doesn’t have the courage to look over at man he’s confessing to, the man he loves so much it’s killing him. “I’ve been dying for years. Well, technically, we’re all dying—“
“Len,” Barry interrupts softly. Len nods and takes a shallow breath, as deep as he’s allowed now.
“Alright. Fine.” He twists his wrist until he can fiddle with the tubing leading to his wrist IV. “Once upon a time, there was a princess—“
“Len, please—“ Barry chokes out and Len laughs and the pressure that he can feel building in his torso makes tears prick in the corner of his eyes. He leans his head back against the headrest and smiles at the ceiling.
“God, Barry. Where’s Iris, huh? You might wanna give her a call. She’ll want to be close by for this one.” He doesn’t see or hear Barry move but there’s suddenly a hand holding his, the grip hard and shaking. He’s scaring the kid and all he can think is good because he’s fucking terrified. Going out in a blaze of glory was…fine. It’s what he’s always known would happen to him. People like him don’t die peacefully at home at the ripe old age of 89. They die on the streets, they die in jail, they die alone and cold.
But this? This is just cruel. To die feet away from the love of his life, feet away from the only one who has ever kept up with him, the only one to test him and make him better.
God, this is the hardest thing he’s ever done.
He breathes out harshly, knowing he only has a few more of those.
“I’m dying, Barry. It won’t be pretty and it probably won’t be quick and, to be honest, it’s all your fucking fault.” The hand holding his squeezes harder. “No, shut up,” he interrupts, stopping Barry before he can even open his mouth, knowing him well enough to know he was about to apologize or some other dumb shit. “I don’t have a whole lot of breaths left, so let me just fucking. Let me get this out.”
Barry is perfectly quiet next to him and finally, finally, Len gets the courage to lift his head and look over at him.
He’s crying. Of course he is, the mensch. He squeezes Barry’s hand back which only makes Barry’s bottom lip wobble. Jeez.
“I have flowers in my lugs and stomach. I’m not being stupidly dramatic, they’re literally growing there. And they’re growing fast and they’ve been growing for years. It’s some fucking dumbass fairytale my mother used to tell me. I don’t even know how I got it, but that’s just the story of my life, hm?” He’d laugh but his chest seizes as some of the pain breaks through the medication and he grips the arm of the chair and Barry’s hand until the feeling passes.
Gideon doesn’t give him any more meds. He has a sneaking suspicious he’s reached the limit.
“Every since you knocked me off that armored truck you have…God, Barry. You made it fun again. It had all gotten too easy and then you showed up and handed my ass to me. Was it—was it—“ Barry drops his head to their clasped hands and nods, his forehead rubbing the bones in Len’s hands harshly.
“God, yeah, Len. Yes. You were—so much. So much fun and so annoying—“ he cuts himself off with what Len’s sure was supposed to be a laugh but just sounds like a sob. Len can feel the corners of his own mouth wobble and he thinks he’s crying but he can’t fully feel that anymore.
The room is getting a little dimmer and he wants to yell at Gideon to stop being dramatic, to turn the lights back up but he’s not sure it’s her doing it.
Each of his breaths is getting a little shallower.
Not a whole lot of time left.
Another twist in his chest and he hunches forward, the pain almost excruciating and making the room spin. Or maybe that’s the lack of oxygen? He’d scream if he could.
Barry cries out and his other hand grabs Len’s shoulder before twisting in the collar of his shirt.
“Please, Len! Gideon?! What do I do?” Len reaches over and grasps their clasped hands, pulling them towards himself. They’re wet and he thinks he’s crying on them.
He doesn’t want to go. Not like this.
He lifts his head, fighting through the pain and locks eyes with Barry’s red ones.
“I love you, Barry Allen,” he grits out and that’s it. That’s all she wrote. The last breath he had in him and of course he gives it to Barry.
How very poetic of him.
The room starts to go dark around him until all he can see is Barry’s shocked face that gets closer and closer until—
Kissing. Barry’s kissing him.
And saying something Len can’t hear until he takes in a harsh breath, a breath he never thought he would have again, and all at once he can hear the pounding of feet heading for the bay, Gideon’s soft alarm alerting the others, and Barry. Barry crying against his mouth, sobs that shake his whole body.
“Please, no, please, not again, I can’t! I love you, I love you, please don’t leave—“ Len takes another huge gasping breath. shocking Barry and making him pull away.
Good thing, too. Len rips his hands away from Barry, pulling away from the IV, and lunges out of the chair, grabbing for the abandoned garbage can and coughs and gags until flower after flower comes out of him.
He feels a hand rubbing his back and a forehead pressed against his shoulder blade as he shakes and throws up.
When he stops long enough to gasp and open his eyes, he doesn’t see tulips, thank god. These are smaller, beautifully delicate with a star design in the middle. Huh. That was a quick change.
He braces his forearm across the diameter of the can and leans his head on it, him and Barry both nearly panting.
The banging on the bay doors startles them both, and they sit up. Len twists enough to look at Barry who has a shaking hand covering his face as his other is twisted in the back of Len’s shirt.
“I have alerted the others of your improved condition. Captain Lance has requested entry.” Len pushes the can away from him.
“Tell her to give me a fucking minute.” His voice is rough but he’s breathing normally for the first time in…years. “Barry,” he whispers and reaches for him.
In a streak of lightening, Barry’s in his arms with a face tucked against Len’s neck as he shakes.
“Don’t you ever do that again, Leonard, or I’ll fucking kill you myself.” His voice is thick and Len can feel his neck getting wet.
“I don’t. I don’t understand. I thought—you and Iris?” He worries for a moment that the flowers will come back once they realize that Barry only did what he had to to make sure Len survived.
Barry laughs wetly against Len’s throat and holds him tighter, practically crawling into Len’s lap.
“We broke up years ago. I never could forgive myself for letting you go off, for letting you just die,” he chokes and Len can’t help but hold him tighter. “She figured it out before I did. Of course she did.”
“What?’
Barry finally pulls back and wipes at his face, sighing as he meets Len’s eyes.
“She realized I was in love with you. I could have asked anyone in the world for help saving her and I chose to go back in time and find you.” He releases his death grip on Len’s shirt and drags his hand up Len’s throat until he can brush the soft skin below Len’s eye with his thumb. “I kept chasing you, choosing you. It wasn’t until I dropped you back off in Siberia that I realized it. When I got back to my time, Iris was waiting for me, and I cried. I mourned for you all over again. It felt exactly like when I found out you had died the first time. So Iris and I, we split up. We’re still friends, we’re just. There was just too much grief.”
God, this beautiful boy. He reaches up and cups Barry’s face in his hands, looking into those beautiful eyes.
The bay doors open, Sara clearly losing her patience, but neither of them look away from each other.
Suddenly, there’s a plastic cup in front of his smelling strongly of mint.
“Courtesy of Gideon, asshole. Don’t ever give me a fucking heart attack like that again.” He takes the cup and throws the mouthwash back, swishing before leaning away and spitting into the garbage can, dropping the cup in afterwards. Sara picks up the can, rubs a hand against the grain of his hair, and strides out of the room to where the rest of the Legends are hovering.
Gideon closes the doors behind her, thank fucking god.
He looks back at Barry who is leaning into the one hand Len still has on his face. Len takes a bracing breath and pulls him closer, pressing their lips together. Barry gasps and his self control seemingly snaps because in moments he’s actually in Len’s lap, tongue tracing Len’s lips until he opens for him.
“God, Len,” Barry whispers against his mouth before diving in again. Len grips his hips and drags him impossibly closer, all while shivering at the feeling of Barry’s tongue dragging against his own. He brings a hand up and pushes it up into Barry’s hair to twist him into a better angle and Barry groans into his mouth.
It’s not until Barry grinds down that Len notices he’s hard. He was so focused on the hot slide of Barry’s mouth that he let’s out a shocked moan that makes Barry grab at his shoulders and grind down again.
He bites down on Barry’s bottom lip before pulling away to flip them, laying Barry out below him. Barry hisses at the cold floor pressing against him through his clothes and twists up against Len in a delicious move that makes Len want to ruin him. He leans back in and uses his grip in Barry’s hair to tilt his head back so he can get a good angle on Barry’s throat as he settles between Barry’s spread legs.
Barry makes a mind-meltingly hot noise when Len bites down and Len has to thrust down against him, has to make him make that noise again. Forever.
Barry’s arms come up around his back as his knees come up to wrap around Len’s waist. He can hear Barry gasping as Len thrusts and Len can’t help but groan as Barry scratches down his back.
“Please, Len, harder—“ Barry groans against Len’s ear, cutting off with a high noise when Len fucks down against him hard enough to push them across the floor by a few inches. Barry let’s one of his hands drop to grip the wrist of the arm Len is using to brace himself over Barry. Len pulls away from the truly spectacular bruise he’s left on Barry’s throat to kiss him, needing to feel his noises directly.
He can barely handle it, how good it feels to feel Barry hard through their jeans, to hear him moan and see him throw his head back as Len get’s a good rhythm going. The grip Barry has on his wrist gets tighter as he starts pulling himself up to rub against Len, his noises getting rougher and rougher. Len pulls back far enough to look down at him, look down at the man he loves. Barry’s face is flushed and his lips are beautifully swollen and wet from Len’s own mouth. He looks like a wet dream and Len can’t wait to fuck him.
He pulls his hand out from Barry’s hair to sneak up his shirt, needing to feel his smooth skin. He grips the muscle of Barry’s hip and thrusts down hard a few times, making Barry drop a leg from around Len’s waist to brace a foot on the floor and gain enough leverage to really thrust up.
Len curses and shakes, getting close already as he feels the beautiful shift of muscle as Barry rolls up against him.
“Barry, you—fuck. You’re mine, now. You’re mine,” he groans out and Barry laughs with his head thrown back until it turns into a panting moan, mouth dropping open. He grabs for the back of Len’s head and drags him down kiss him, panting into Len’s mouth with every thrust. Len can feel it hot in his stomach and burning through his veins. The leg Barry still has around his waist pulls him harder and harder and Barry’s noises start coming out faster, higher, little ‘ah, ah, ah’s and Len can tell he’s close.
“I’m—fuck, I’m gonna come. You drive me fucking crazy, I can’t stand you. Can’t wait for you to fuck me, want you to fuck me so badly,” and that’s it for Len. Barry doesn’t even seem to know he’s talking, eyes closed and face starting to scrunch up in pleasure, but it still does it for Len.
He fucks down harder and harder as he feels the heat in his stomach turn molten imagining pressing into Barry, imagining fucking him just like this; wild and fast and hard. He presses himself closer, pressing against Barry completely as his thrusts go erratic and he growls against Barry’s mouth, coming in his pants like, well. Like someone more like Barry’s age.
Barry isn’t far behind, cursing and gasping out Len’s name in equal measure. Len keeps thrusting, working them both through it, until he’s too sensitive to do more than just stay pressed against Barry. They’re both gasping for air and sweating through their shirts. Len drops down onto his elbows and kisses Barry despite the fact that they’re barely able to breathe.
“I love you, Barry Allen,” he whispers into Barry’s mouth, making it twist up into a grin.
“Yeah, I love you too. Asshole.”