Chapter Text
“Mr. Stark?” Pepper’s voice sounds throughout the room. Her high heels click along the floor. A gasp. She must have spotted Tony huddled on the floor
-
He’s falling.
A feeling he’s come to know well over the years. When you fly in a metal suit, you kinda have to get accustomed to the feeling of your stomach rising into your throat.
The air whistles past his ears. The wind buffeting his face. The flutter of his hair. The way his limbs flail as he falls. The cool air freezing his skin.
A feeling that makes him feel free yet it fills him with fear. After all, most people aren’t afraid of heights, but rather the fall. A natural instinct that Tony’s learned to suppress over the years.
He feels himself slow down until he’s nearly stopped and just floating. His body slowly tilts upright until his feet make contact with what he thinks is a ground.
He opens his eyes.
It’s a city. It seems real but a lingering sense of ‘something's not right’ remains in his mind. Tony looks around cautiously. People walk in all directions around him. They leave after images and are almost hazes. Their faces are blurred and it feels like timelapse due to the speed people are moving at. They seem to move erratically but none of them touch him. It’s deathly quiet despite the crowd of people.
Tony Stark
A single voice speaks. It sounds like one voice yet, it sounds like millions of voices speak. It's loud but quiet. Calm but Emotional. Soft but fierce. A paradox itself.
No one stops. The blurred people continue to move.
“Hello?” Tony calls out warily. He takes a step back and the sea of people move to make room. He looks around for the source of the sound.
What do you desire most?
The feeling of wrongness settles like a rock in his stomach. His instincts raise alarms in his head and Tony tenses. Tony swallows audibly as sweat drips down his neck.
The ground cracks beneath him.
“What-” His voice is cut off as light explodes from the ground.
A kaleidoscope of light and explode in his vision. Lights spew from the cracks in the ground. A cacophony of sounds grate against his ear. The world spins around him. Images are warped and blurred. Colors move and shift as the scenery spins quicker and quicker. Lightning cables. The hum in his ears grows louder and louder with each passing second. The light grows impossibly bright.
What do you desire most?
Colors flash and burn his eyes. Despite the rainbow of light, Tony can’t close his eyes. His eyes stay open enchanted by the vortex of light. He tries to get his legs to move but they grow heavier the more he tries. The spinning goes faster and the world blurs. His eyes can’t focus on what he’s seeing. The crackling of the lighting increases in crescendo. The sound of the ground crumbling fills his ears. White and rainbows streak past his vision in the tornado of light.
What will you pay?
What are you willing to give?
What can you sacrifice?
It’s loud. Tony can barely think.
Despite that, a single word pops in his head. An answer.
Everything
The world turns black and Tony is falling again.
-
what could’ve been but never was
The possibilities are endless.
-
Tony’s eyes open.
He’s in the middle of a green field filled with tall grass. The grass rustles softly in the wind. Sunlight beams down on him. It’s bright. He brings a hand up to shield his eyes from the light as he looks around.
His eyes land on a figure not too far from him. A young child. A girl, a little younger than the current Peter with brown hair and eyes. Her eyes are bright and filled with wonder.
Without any explanation, Tony’s heart clenches.
The girl smiles brightly at him.
he falls.
-
When he opens his eyes again he’s sitting in the tower’s living room. From the sky he can tell it’s night and a movie is playing on the screen. The air is warm and filled with laughter. The couch beneath him is soft and warm. Tony breathes in and can smell butter and pizza.
A smile is on Tony’s face. He can’t seem to move his body in the way he wants. It moves for him. His eyes turn to look at a teenager next to him with brown hair. His face is wrinkled with laughter and says something Tony should be able to hear but can’t. Tony’s mouth, without permission, says something in turn, but like before Tony can’t hear anything.
Tony’s laughing but it’s not him who’s laughing. His limbs don’t respond to his thoughts It should scare him but strangely enough, he feels safe.
Next to the brown-haired teenager is another teenager with dirty blonde hair who’s cackling. Tony’s head turns to look at a woman with orange hair. She looks as if she’s trying to contain her laughter. A man with dark skin and a bald man are seated near her. All of them are laughing and smiling.
Tony’s heart squeezes and the ground collapses beneath him.
-
A crowd of people surrounds Tony. They’re all tilted up to look at the billboards in the city. Shock, dread, and relief ripple through the crowd. Tony can vaguely hear wails and some cheers as he focuses on the electronic billboard. Faces pop up and with a drop of dread, he recognizes the faces cycling through the avengers. His stomach twists as his own face pops up with the word deceased next to it.
He lets himself fall.
-
Tony is standing with a podium in front of him. Tony’s lips are moving but it feels as if they aren’t his own. He can’t hear what he speaks but sorrow and horror breaks throughout the crowd. Some people have tears running down their faces as they sob, loudly and some quietly, others not at all.
Some are relieved with traces of tears in their eyes.
Behind him are the portraits of the dead avengers.
Black takes over his vision
-
He’s standing on a rusted planet. Red dust billows past him. He can smell blood and iron. A sharp pain pulses in his stomach.
His body feels like it’s being ripped apart. A voice breaks past the layer of cotton in his ears and his eyes meet Peter. Teenage Peter who’s wearing the battered Iron Spider suit. He watches the teen that’s covered in grime and dirt stumble towards him. His eyes are blown wide and his face is twisted in horror.
Tony looks down at his hands.
They’re turning to dust.
No wonder it hurts.
Tony feels himself say it’s okay. He can't hear himself but Peter grips tightly onto him trembling. Tony’s arms come around to grip the boy tightly as his hands cannot. Peter’s hands are fading to dust like Tony’s
Tony’s head feels like it’s tearing apart.
Peter looks up and Tony can see him say ‘I’m sorry’ before the boy’s face cracks and he turns to dust in Tony’s arms.
Before Tony can do anything he feels himself break apart.
-
Tony’s on the same rusted planet. The taste of iron on his tongue. The stabbing pain in his stomach. The tingling of his hands as they fade into numbness.
Tony turns to see Peter looking at him in horror. The splitting pain from the previous vision is back. Tony is being pulled apart. Peter runs over to him yelling something. Tony tries to say something but pain pulses and his knees buckle. He collapses only to be caught by Peter.
Peter yells something.
Toyn carefully brings a hand up to touch Peter’s face.
Words don’t come out and Tony mouths ‘I’m sorry’ to Peter.
Peter’s face cracks and tears stream down his face. Sobs wrack Peter’s body as he clutches at Tony’s fading body.
The world fades as he breaks apart.
-
Tony finds himself standing in an orange plane. Everything is still. Not a sound or soul in sight.
What are you willing to pay, Tony Stark?
A beat of silence.
Everything.
-
Tony's eyes snap open and he gasps as he sits up. He's heaving for breath as he tries to calm his racing head. The pounding of his heart. His throat tightens as he tries to make sense of what happened. Hands grip onto something soft. A blanket that was on him is pooled at his waist.
Where is he?
Tony looks around still breathing heavily. His room in the mansion from the looks of it. The familiar buzz of panic is setting in until he notices a hand is on his shoulder.
“Tony.” a quiet voice spoke. Tony finally notices the presence next to him. He turns to look and notices Pepper sitting at the edge of the bed staring at him with a creased forehead.
Tony blinks trying to clear his eyes.
His mind is oddly blank. Like reality hasn’t set in yet.
A flash of pain pounds in his head and he moves to clutch his forehead. His limbs feel shaky and his brain is sluggish. His eyes notice Pepper who has outstretched her hands towards him but seems to be hesitating. She looks at him once and then to her hand before pulling it back.
“Tony.” She says again. Her voice is soft against his ears. Eyebags are underneath her eyes. She’s uncharacteristically frazzled and tired.
“Pepper.” tony croaks out. He moves to sit up straight. His hand falls to clutch at the comforter. “What’s up?”
The words are like sandpaper on his tongue.
“You passed out.” She pauses. “You… Just slumped over. I was worried, like-”
She cuts herself off head shaking. Her bangs flutter with the movement.
“Tony.” her eyes are filled with worry and Tony feels a twinge of guilt. “What happened?”
Her hand touches his shoulder.
It's warm.
Pepper feels safe.
She's alive.
“So.” Tony starts, his eyes glance down to notice he’s still in his suit, albeit wrinkled and minus a jacket.
“So?”
“You know those…Interesting numbers I found?”
“Interesting numbers?” Her face scrunches in thought as she tries to remember before looking back at him with understanding. “The ones that didn’t add up?”
“Yes, those. Remember how I said someone is dealing weapons under the table?” He pauses because despite everything, Tony is dramatic. “Well, that someone is Stane.”
“Stane?” She asks. Tony nods. Her face twists into one of pity, yet it doesn’t bother him. The hand on his shoulder is warm.
Pepper is warm.
“Yeah and well, I confronted him about it. You can guess how that went. Long story short. He was trying to kill me and take SI for himself.
A frown is present on Pepper’s face.
“Where is he now? I saw him leave, but I didn’t know. Tony. I’m so sorry.” Her voice is full of emotion before hse looks up to the ceiling. “Jarvis?”
He let Stane get away. How could he be so stupid? He let emotions get the best of him. You’d think after a lifetime of controlling them, he’d be able to. Hell, it wasn’t even Thanos. It was just Stane.
But that’s exactly it.
It was Stane.
Thanos killed billions but Stane scared him more.
Tony was afraid of why he felt that way.
The man who betrayed him. The man who nearly killed him.
His hands clutch at the bedsheets and he grits his teeth.
“It pains me to say this, but I’m afraid I don’t know,” Jarvis says from the ceiling.
“If it was ten years from now I would’ve been able to-” Tony yells but cuts himself off shifting his eyes to Pepper who’s staring at him baffled. She’s about to say something but stops herself.
The technology gap is starting to weigh heavily on Tony. The cameras and sensors that should have been there aren’t. The drones and tech aren’t enough. If it wasn’t just him to create the technology he could’ve-
Maybe.
Tony takes a deep breath in an effort to calm himself down.
“Set up a search squad or something. The suits. The drones. Anything. Just, find him.”
“Already set it up, sire. I'll alert you if they’re any developments.” Jarvis says.
“Thanks, J.”
“Of, course sire.”
Tony goes quiet while Pepper gives him a calculating look. Tony looks away from her.
“You know, you have me, you have Rhodey, you have Happy. All of us, are here for you.” Tony looks into her eyes that are filled with such intensity Tony can’t look away. Her hand grips his shoulder tighter. “If there’s anything wrong or anything we can do. Let us know. Please.”
Tony sighs.
“I know. Trust me, I know.” Tony’s hands clutch at the blanket tighter. “I just… I can’t tell you. Not now.”
“Then when?” she asks, her voice rising in volume. “Tony, you’ve been running yourself into the ground. Just please-”
He cuts her off.
“Later, Pepper.” He says he feels his body slump. Energy has left his limbs and he looks at Pepper’s eyes trying to convey all the words that he refuses to go past his lips. “I promise. I’ll tell you. Just, just not now. Okay?”
Pepper signs and looks away. She looks like she wants to fight a little more but she lets her hand fall to her side.
“Okay, fine.” Her shoulders slump and her eyebrows are still furrowed. “I'll leave you alone for now, but we’re all hanging out tomorrow, okay? After the press conference.”
“All?’
"Yes, all. Happy, Rhodey and me. You look like you need to relax a bit. Not with a party, so don't go and get any ideas."
Tony laughs, it’s a little strained but Pepper perks up slightly.
She’s missing a few names.
“Okay.” He says and Pepper smiles.
“We’ll find Stane. You just rest up. You’ve certainly had an eventful day. Let Jarvis know if you need anything.
“Thanks, Pep.”
A bittersweet smile spreads onto her face. Her eyes are crinkled due to a genuine smile but her forehead is still contracted with worry.
"Take another vacation day, Tony. You need it. I'll prep the cards for the press conference tomorrow."
“Press conference? On what, exactly?”
“Everything? The arc reactor explosion got leaked, your concealed weapons contract, the car crash, and most of all, your weird behavior. Damage control.”
“When do we not do damage control?” Tony asks and Pepper lets out a soft laugh.
“Maybe if you didn’t get caught up in so many scandals. “ she pokes his forehead lightly. Her shoulders seem less tense and her smile is less strained.
Tony feels himself smiling.
“Well, it wouldn’t be me if I didn’t.”
-
When Pepper leaves Jarvis doesn't let Tony go into the lab. According to him, it's his vacation day and he needs to rest.
Like hell he does.
Leaving Tony lying in his bed under layers of blankets unsure of what to do.
Ten years is a long time. Yet so short.
Ten years.
What to do with them?
-
Tony ends up checking on Peter.
Paranoia forces him to even though he saw the boy healthy and alive only a few days ago.
The boy is growing as a child should. He has two loving parents who would do anything for him. His school has mysteriously become better(Tony definitely didn't donate a lot of money). If Tony can stop snap he’ll continue to just be a child, like he always should have been.
He thinks about the spider bite.
Would Peter ever become Spider-Man?
Peter is happy and alive.
Tony will do anything to ensure those two things remain constant.
He's not sure what happened to the ones lost in the snap. He never did find out before they were all killed.
He wonders, not for the first time, what became of his time?
Perhaps, that's a thought best saved for later.
-
Tony manages to find Harley. It wasn’t very hard. Just a quick search and Harley pops up. He’s around the same age as Peter. The boy who would eventually shoot a potato gun at him in the cold winter of Tennessee. The kid who would eventually become an ally, a friend, his kid.
Tony feels funny after admitting that.
"Admit it, you need me. We're connected."
Tony had lost both of his children to Thanos.
He has the chance to help the two children he'd almost call his own.
Tony takes it.
-
Tony thinks of the dream.
He can’t begin to figure out what it meant.
Each of the visions was different yet so similar.
-
He thinks of Stane.
Where has he gone? When will he show up again? Is Tony safe from him?
Tony’s not sure what happened.
He can’t remember it all too well other than the rage that took over. His mind that screamed at him to just get away.
Fight or flight is a weird thing.
-
“Okay, Tony. Don’t do anything reckless.”
“Me? Reckless? Come on, Pepper, it’s like you don’t know who you’re talking to.” Tony chuckles while gesturing to himself .
Pepper only fondly rolls her eyes and pushes his shoulder playfully.
“Stick to the cards. Don’t be weird.”
“Basically, don’t be me,” Tony says and Pepper gives him a flat stare. “You know, I really should promote you.”
“Like you would survive a day without me watching you like a hawk. You don’t even know your social security number.”
“It’s…” He pauses and puts an exaggerated thoughtful expression on his face. “Five.”
“Missing a few numbers, there.” She laughs with a bright smile.
A fond smile inches his way onto Tony’s face. He turns to the doors.
He takes a deep breath. The mask settling in place in the form of a confident smile.
“Okay, let’s do this.”
-
Tony steps into the room. Instantly, people descend upon him. Camera’s flash and people are clamoring for his attention. The questions range from his weapon contracts and to, well, just about everything. Tony tries to hide a grimace and plasters a smile on his face. He greets people as he walks past them. He walks up to the podium in the back of the room. Pepper breaks away from him to stand near the back.
As Tony is getting settled at the podium with last-minute adjustments he notices a man, Phil Coulson, approaches her.
Odd, maybe but not unexpected.
He looks at them for a second before giving his attention to the crowd.
“So.” He starts off and the people begin to quiet. “I’m sure you’re all wondering what I’ve been doing. A lot has happened in the past few days, from the car crash, the reactor, and myself.” He lets out a laugh in hopes of diffusing the tension. His hands are clenching at the podium tightly but everything else is relaxed purposefully.
“For starters, I’m fine. Not injured. Now, the arc reactor. A mechanical error. Nothing major. The thing was old anyway. No people were harmed. We have a new design in the works to make the reactor more effective at the fraction of the size. To my recent disappearance.” He grins. “Let’s just say, I’ve been working on some exciting stuff.”
“Oh, and I’d like to say, Obidiah Stane is no longer working with us and is not allowed on anything to do with Stark Industries.” The room is silent for a beat before some people are making a commotion. That wasn’t in the cards, but who is he to follow the rules?
“If you’re curious as to why, he’s been found to be illegally selling weapons.”
The reporters realize what he’s said and the volume immediately picks up. People start to yell questions. The flashes only grow every second. Tony just smiles and waits for everyone to settle down. He can see Pepper and Rhodey staring at him, both of them are baffled.
He forgot he didn’t tell anyone about his plan to shut down the weapons branch. Whoops?
“I never got to say goodbye to my father.” He nearly whispers it. Quiet enough that the mic barely picks up on it. “There are questions I would've asked him. I would’ve asked about what he did. If he was conflicted... If he ever had doubts... Or maybe he was every inch of the man we all remember from the news rails.” He draws out casually like this isn’t a press conference for a billion-dollar company.
“I’ve come to see Young Americans have been killed by the very weapons I created to defend and protect them.” He pauses as people take in his words. “The man responsible for that was Stane. I also, with ignorance I add, allowed him to. I saw that I became part of a system that has become comfortable with zero accountability.”
He pauses for effect and straightens his back and gazes at everyone in the room.
“I’ve come to realize. I have more to offer this world than just making things to blow up.” He says louder with more confidence in each word. No turning back. “ I’ve decided that I want this company to go in a new direction. One that is better for the good of the people and the future. “
“And that is why, effective immediately, I’m shutting down the weapons manufacturing division of Stark industries.”
Voices begin to yell at him. Voices blur as people fight to be heard. People are staring at him in shock. Cameras are flashing and going off every second. Flashes are nearly blinding him. He wishes he was wearing his sunglasses. Despite the chaos, Tony continues to speak.
“Stark Industries-” His voice is drowned out by others. Someone is trying to push him off the stage. Tony gets the feeling of Dejavu. “Stark Industries will no longer be producing or selling weapons and now will be pursuing the development of sustainable energy.”
He steps off the stage and the crowd tries to surround them. Security does their job and prevents the reporters from getting too close.
“Thank You for your time.” He bids the crowd goodbye. He grins for a few cameras with a cryptic smile. He passes Pepper and Colsoun who are bost staring at him with varying degrees of shock.
He leaves the room with a grin plastered on his face.
-
He feels lighter somehow. A weight has been lifted from his shoulders. The air seems much easier to breathe. He nearly skips as he escapes the press conference.
Granted, he didn’t handle it any better than the previous run, but Tony’s always had the flair for the dramatics.
Shield is going to have a hell of fun time with that maneuver.
Tony lets out a laugh.
Man, Fury must be pissed. Oh well, not like he cared.
Tony only laughs out loud even more.
-
Tony escapes back to his mansion. Somehow avoiding everyone. He takes a step back into his home. A sigh escapes him as he drops his suit jacket to the floor and makes his way over to the kitchen. His mind is exhausted even though it was being peppier than usual. He much rather spend time in the lab. There’s a reason why he made Pepper the CEO.
Speaking of that, he really needs to do that soon. Maybe not now with all the chaos he’s created but soon.
He’ll think about that later, right now he needs a cup of caffeine.
Tony walks over to the coffee maker. The mansion still feels a bit foreigin at times. It’s been, was, a few years since it he’s lived in so getting used to it has been odd. The view is killer though.
Leather shoes click against the marble floor as he waits for the machine. He begins to hum a song as he waits. He grabs a mug and fills it relishing in the simplicity of the routine of it. The coffee burns his tongue but he doesn’t mind. At least coffee doesn't change.
Tony takes out his phone to start doing some task work. He walks down the hallway to the living room not really paying attention to everything.
“Tony Stark.”
Tony whirls around nearly dropping his cup of coffee. His gauntlet flares to life and points it in the direction of the voice. Tony nearly fires but he meets the singular eye of the intruder and stops,
“How the hell?! Why are you here? How did you even get in here?” Tony yells exasperatedly gesturing wildly with he gauntleted arm.“You shouldn’t be able to be here! Jarvis? You there? Jarvis?”
Nick fury stares at him unimpressed. The look Tony gives Fury rivals the man’s own glare.
There on his couch is the one eyed leader of SHIELD. The one and only, Nick Fury. The man is relaxed or pretending to be, as he lounges on his couch. Tony watches as Fury’s one eye focuses on the still active repulsor on his hand. Guess they know about the suit. Better question, is how they related it to him?
“Godamnit.” Tony lets a frustrated yell. “I didn’t update that. Of course I didn’t. You can't hack my servers but you can get into that. Man, 2008. Not great. Wouldn’t recommend it.”
Nick fury only stares at him more. Tony lets out a sigh.
“It appears I’ve been rude, to a guest” He grits out. He lets the repulsor deconstruct back into his watch with a click. He doesn’t miss the way Fury’s eyes follow the motion. He puts on an overly sweet smile that doesn't reach his eyes. “Why, hello, Nick Fury. To what do I owe the pleasure?”
At that Nick Fury raises an eyebrow.
“I’m here to talk.” He gives Tony a calculating look.
This is ought to be fun