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satin birds

Chapter 10: vespertine

Notes:

dearest readers... i don't even have the words to express how sorry i am. i sincerly apologize for making you wait this much. i really wanted to post the final chapter much, much sooner but due to some personal issues and struggling with writer's block, it got delivered a little late. :(

this chapter was heavily inspried by björk's masterpiece album "vespertine", so i had to name the final chapter after it. especially the songs "frosti" and "pagan poetry music box version" were on loop for the most part when i wrote this chapter. so you can use it as a background music if you want. :)

alright, enough talking. i hope you like the finale! ❤️

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

The Callenreese Family: Where Are They Now?

It’s been two years since the horrible fire that resulted in the death of James Callenreese and burning of the old Callenreese mansion, which begs the question: Where are Aslan Callenreese and his husband Eiji Okumura-Callenreese now?

Due to the couple choosing to spend the rest of their lives away from the press, it’s unknown where they live at the moment but one thing is almost certain: They are somewhere in Japan. Shortly before their move, Aslan Callenreese released a public statement and announced that he donated 70% of his wealth to various charities. “No human being needs this much money and certainly not me and my husband.” said Mr. Callenreese and politely asked the world to respect their privacy.

Wherever they are now, we wish Aslan and Eiji a very happy life and once again, thank them for their generosity.


It’s the coldest winter they have since they moved here.

Snow covers their lovely garden like a silky white sheet. The delicate snowflakes Ash sees on the petals of primroses remind him of powdered sugar. At nights, the snow silently beats their thick glass windows as Ash adoringly coats his husband’s body with hot kisses.

Something about winter turns them bolder. Wilder.

Eiji sighs in a coy seductiveness, his nails sinking into Ash’s back like he’s a pleased cat. “It’s so cold.” he complains quietly, even though their home is warm enough, even though there’s no barrier between him and Ash, even though Ash is inside him. “I wish you would warm me up…”

Ash stares deep into that dark brown gems and tenderly, unhurriedly, presses his lips to Eiji’s beautiful neck, knowing exactly what he’s asking for. “Gladly.”

Then, everything is even more intense. His thrusts are faster and deeper. Eiji’s moans are more breathless and erratic. The whole world brightens with a white-scarlet pleasure behind Ash’s eyelids as they get lost in each other’s body for countless hours.

In the morning, Ash wakes up alone but the faint music coming from inside the house lets him know where Eiji is before his mind even has a chance to wonder. Groaning a little, he stretches out and puts his morning robe on.

It’s no secret how much Ash likes to sleep in the mornings but he’ll gladly give up on his precious sleep hours if it means he gets to see Eiji dancing.

Nefertiti elegantly rubs into his ankles the moment Ash gets out of their bedroom, but she quickly runs away like the diva cat queen she is the moment Ash makes a move to pet her. Buddy, of course, is the opposite. He immediately lies down on the floor for a belly rub when he spots Ash and Nefertiti, jealous of the attention he’s receiving, comes back to demand petting. Ash can’t help but snort in amusement.

“Are you guys hungry?” he asks innocently.

Buddy woofs. Nefertiti lets out a long, displeased meow.

“See, I know you’re both lying because it’s nine in the morning and you would burn this house down if Eiji didn’t already feed you.” Ash says fondly but he still gives each one of them a treat, because, well, these are his babies.

Then, he starts moving in the direction of music. Like he expected, Eiji doesn’t stop dancing when Ash gently turns the door handle and walks inside. He rests his back against the wall and watches his husband with bright eyes.

It’s amazing, how Eiji manages to look even more beautiful than usual when he’s dancing. In the past two years, Ash observed carefully as the constant shadowy sadness Eiji used to carry in his body slowly vanished. Both of them are still wounded, still haunted by their shared thorny past, but they are free now. They are healing. No matter how many bad memories or nightmares they have to fight together, they don’t have to go back to that world.

And it’s worth everything.

Eiji finishes his dance with one last elegant move and then gives Ash the prettiest smile in the world. “How was it?”

Breathtaking as usual. Instead of saying this, Ash purses his lips teasingly. “I don’t know, Mr. Eiji. Some of your moves was too stiff.”

Eiji’s smile doesn’t falter. “Oh, you see, Mr. Aslan… Someone was rather rough with my body last night. That might be the reason.”

Ash splutters as his face turns crimson red. “You asked for it!

Eiji’s laughter rings like wind bell, peppering Ash’s face with little kisses while he wraps his arms around Ash’s neck. “You’re so fun to tease, I can’t help it.”

Ash sends him a reproachful look but still presses a kiss against Eiji’s sweaty hairline. “Take a shower before you hurt your muscles.”

“But I’m hungry.” Eiji complains.

Ash kisses him again. “Shower first. Breakfast later.”

Eiji is in a clingy mood today so Ash gently carries him to the shower. Even covered in sweat, Eiji is the most gorgeous creature he’s ever seen. Ash innocently presses a few kisses across his husband’s shoulders and smirks when Eiji turns around to kiss him properly. But before their mouths can meet, Eiji’s stomach grumbles loudly, causing him to look ashamed.

It’s Ash turn to laugh. “Alright, why don’t you take a quick shower? I’ll fix us a breakfast.”

Eiji hums. “Thanks baby.”

Ash still can’t claim he’s an expert at cooking but he’s been learning in the last two years. Right now, he knows Eiji can use an energizer breakfast since he’s been practicing ballet for God knows how many hours. He leaves his own coffee to brew and makes Eiji tea in the meantime. He’s just in the middle of making an omelet when Eiji emerges from the shower and drapes himself over Ash’s back like a comfy blanket.

“Oooh, eggs and cheese toast.” he observes happily. “Trying to fatten me up?”

Ash snorts lightly. “I mean, you’re as light as a feather. You could use a few pounds, my love.”

“Fair.”

They eat their breakfast in a comfortable silence with occasional chatter. Buddy and Nefertiti make their way into the kitchen at some point and look at them with accusing eyes, as if to say “How can you guys eat without us?” Eiji jokingly scolds them by reminding they already had a very filling breakfast.

Ash offers to do the dishes but Eiji insists on doing them, saying he’ll feel drowsy for the rest of the day if he doesn’t move around a little. Upon this, Ash drops a kiss to his still half-wet hair and carries his feet to his office to answer some e-mails.

First, he opens the weekly report from Griffin’s rehabilitation center.

Greetings Mr. Aslan,

Griffin had a pretty productive week! Ever since he got back most of his motor skills back, he’s been fond of painting. He wants to spend most of his day by that way and we let him, but of course we’re careful about not tiring him too much.

He still has a long way on gaining back his ability to speak properly but he’s also made a lot of process on it. He regularly says “Thank you, good morning, no please, yes please.” and a few more basic sentences.

Like we discussed before, most of his problems are based on the emotional trauma rather than the effects of his accident.

We’re attaching a video for you to see his paintings. We are excited to see you soon for your monthly visits. Please give Mr. Eiji our greetings as well.

Ash’s eyes are glassy as he opens the video but a few happy tears finally escape when he sees his big brother shyly showing the paintings he’s made to his caretaker. His fingers reach to the screen, caressing Griffin’s face lightly. He’s so happy he’ll get to see him again soon.

Ash still remembers the day he told Max his best friend is still alive when he, Jessica and their son came to visit them in Japan. Max had been angry at first, furious even, thinking Ash was just playing a cruel prank on him. An hour long drive to Griff’s rehabilitation center was one of the most tense experiences of Ash’s life.

When Max finally saw Griffin in blood and flesh, he just stood there for a few painful minutes before he threw himself to Griffin’s feet and started crying violently. Ash also cried silently as he watched them but Griff didn’t shed a single tear that day, just petted Max’s hair for hours to comfort him with a warm smile on his face.

Ash sighs a little as he moves to another important e-mail. His whole body goes rigid in mere moments and he grabs his phone in an almost manic panic.

“Relax.” is Blanca’s first word when he picks up.

“How can I relax?” Ash snaps. “Why the hell am I blowing tons of money to that security team if they are incapable of doing their job?”

“Ash,” Blanca says calmly but Ash can picture him pinching his nose bridge right now. “It was just one guy who was trying to sell the news to the magazine and I took care of it before he could even act. Stop freaking out.”

Ash lets out a long breath. Sometimes it’s too easy to forget. Easy to forget how their life was before they moved to this safe haven. Easy to ignore the messages he still gets from the old acquaintances in New York, begging him to come back to the business world.

Easy to pretend like the press doesn’t haunt them anymore, like he didn’t hire a security team to protect their private life from hungry eyes.

“Ash.” Blanca says again, and this time his voice is oddly smooth. “You know your security directly affects me. I would never let someone pry into your business.”

A cold tremor runs its finger on Ash’s spine. For a moment, he can vividly picture a man with twisted neck and wide open eyes—

“Yes, I know,” Ash replies tensely. “Take care, Blanca. Give Natasha my love.”

“Will do.”

Ash stands frozen in the middle of his office for a while after he hangs up, but eventually, he lightly shakes his head and heads to the living room again. Eiji’s already done the dishes and is wrapping up his call with Ibe-san when Ash walks in.

“Thank you, Ibe-san. I will call you again soon.” Eiji says respectfully in his native language. Ash’s Japanese still isn’t in a level he wants to achieve, but he’s still proud of himself for understanding Eiji’s words.

Eiji smiles at him. “I sent Ibe-san the photos I took on our last trip.”

Ash sits on the couch and takes Eiji’s legs to his lap. Immediately, Nefertiti jumps into the couch and sits on Eiji’s legs. Ash suppresses a sigh. “What did he think?”

“Well,” Eiji says shyly. “He praised them but I think he’s a little biased.”

“Is he?” Ash asks teasingly, rubbing one of Eiji’s ankle. “Or are you just talented and deserve every single of his praising?”

Ash, stooop.” Eiji whines and covers his face with his small hands. Nefertiti somehow takes this as an invitation to settle on Eiji’s chest. Laughing, Ash stands up and presses a lingering kiss on Eiji’s hair before he moves into the kitchen to make both of them hot cocoa. When it’s done, he goes back to living room and puts them on the coffee table to wait as they cool down a little bit.

Eiji is looking to his phone again. “Oh,” he says. “Misa-chan wants to Facetime us tonight.”

Ash makes a humming sound. It has been hard on Eiji to watch Misa move back to Tokyo for college, but thankfully he’s adapting well now. “Sounds good to me. I miss that brat.”

“Don’t let her hear you call her that,” Eiji singsongs and reaches out to take his cocoa. Their darling cat is displeased by the movement, so she jumps from the couch to the floor to find Buddy and bother him instead, making them giggle.

They quiet down a little bit as they sip their cocoa. Ash uses the silence to admire Eiji’s beautiful face while his husband thoughtfully circles the mouth of his mug.

Just like Ash expected, Eiji speaks hesitantly a moment later. “I’m going to ask you something and you definitely don’t have to say yes if it makes you uncomfortable.”

Ash frowns, setting his mug down on the table again. “What is it, bambi?”

Eiji looks at him for a while and then sighs. “Sing and Yut-Lung are planning to come to Izumo to see me. And I… was wondering if you would be okay with them staying in our home.”

Ash stares.

“Yut-Lung said they can also stay in a hotel.” Eiji continues softly. “He said he doesn’t want to disturb you, so they are still waiting an answer from me so they can buy their tickets.”

Ash has been aware that this weird… friendship between Eiji and Yut-Lung never went away. Once they escaped to Izumo, Eiji reconnected with Yut-Lung and ever since then, they’ve always been in touch, even if they didn’t see each other in person. Ash also still talks to Sing— because he knows Shorter and Eiji would be very disappointed in him if he doesn’t, and it’s not like he has a personal problem with Sing. He likes the guy.

Yut-Lung, on the other hand, is another story. Another wound.

He startles a little when Eiji’s hand cups his cheek. “You don’t have to say yes, my love,” he murmurs gently. “They can stay in a hotel and I can meet them without involving you…”

“Yes.” Ash shakes his head. “No. I mean—“ Frustrated, he passes a hand through his hair. It’s almost too long for him now, he even uses it in a mini ponytail. But Eiji likes it, really likes it, so Ash won’t get a haircut anytime soon. “Yes, they can stay in our home.”

Eiji bites his lower lip. “You don’t feel like you have to say yes, right?”

At this, Ash gently wraps his arms around his waist. “I think it’s time to face my past with Yut-Lung.”


Something funny happens when they’re at the airport.

Yut-Lung is anxiously braiding and then disentangling his hair before they even boarded but Sing can’t exactly blame him. Eleven— almost thirteen if you count the flight from Tokyo to Izumo too— hours in the air does not sound good.

They’re sipping unnecessarily expensive airport coffee in the waiting room when two teenage girls approach them. Sing gathers himself a little but the girls only have eyes for his boyfriend.

“Excuse me, sir.” the braver looking girl says while the shy one partly hides behind her. “Can we ask you a question?”

Yut-Lung looks wary upon the question. Sing knows he still gets nervous when strangers tries to talk to him, even if they’re two harmless looking girls. He lightly squeezes his hand and Yut-Lung gives the girls a half-smile. “Sure thing.”

“We were wondering if your hair is real.”

Silence.

Sing doesn’t manage to suppress his snort of amusement quickly enough and Yut-Lung sends him a frosty glance. But after getting to know him like the palm of his hand over the years, Sing can easily tell Yut-Lung is also amused by the question.

“Yes.” he replies, very politely. “It is very real.”

The girls gasp with excitement. “I knew it!” the shy –well, not so shy now— girl exclaims happily. “Sir please give us some tips! It’s sooo long and shiny!”

“Well,” Yut-Lung says seriously, leaning slightly forward. “Normally it’s top secret information but you girls are very sweet so listen carefully…”

He talks with the girls until their flight is announced and Sing watches the entire conversation fondly. When their time to leave comes, the girls insist on giving Yut-Lung a kiss on the cheek. His boyfriend’s cheeks are rosy with happiness as they get in the line for ticket control.

“What?” he snaps when Sing catches his eye, but there’s no real heat behind the words.

Sing smirks, pressing a long kiss on top of Yut-Lung’s head. “They were right. You have gorgeous hair. Then again, every inch of you is gorgeous.”

Yut-Lung’s blush deepens. “Flatterer.”

“Only for you, mooncake.”

Once they settle in their seats, Yue rests his head on his shoulder and quickly drops off. Sing envies him, but fails to fall asleep as well so he puts his headphones on and listens to some music. He doesn’t know how long he does that but at some point his headphones slip from his ears and he doesn’t make a move to plug them back, eyelids getting heavy with sleep.

He’s right in middle of sleep and awakeness when Yut-Lung whispers. “I’m scared.”

Sing is instantly wide awake. Turning his head slowly to not disturb his boyfriend, he whispers back. “What for, doll?”

“It’s just…” Yut-Lung lightly clears his throat before he continues, his beautiful black eyes looking lost. “It’s been too long, Sing. I don’t know if we’re doing the right thing. I don’t know if Ash is gonna forgive me.”

Sing lifts one arm up and immediately, Yut-Lung sidles into his embrace like an affectionate cat, breathing him in deeply. “I don’t know either and that’s why we have to try.” he admits softly. “I know I love you. I know Eiji loves you. And I’m almost certain even after everything… Ash loves you too.”

“You can’t know this.” Yut-Lung’s voice is bitter. “I hurt him so much.”

“And he hurt you so much too.” Sing says gently. “How do you know he doesn’t have his regrets?”

Yut-Lung chooses to stay silent.

Another couple of hours in the air must've numb Yut-Lung’s nerves, because he lays comfortably between Sing’s arms until they land, passing the remaining time watching a horrible movie. But the moment they board from Tokyo to Izumo, his face closes off again.

“It’s gonna be alright.” Sing tries to comfort him, but for some reason –maybe because they’re fucking exhausted, maybe because Yut-Lung is feeling pretty nervous— it falls horribly flat.

Yue still gives him a small kiss on the cheek.

When they finally, finally, land in Izumo; they both look like zombies. “Too bright,” Yut-Lung complains about the sunlight. “Fucking time zones.” Sing would laugh at his boyfriend’s pout if he wasn’t practically dead on his feet.

They take their stuff from baggage claim. Sing is wondering if he should call Eiji now when Yut-Lung silently taps his shoulder and points out someone.

It’s like time merely passed its fingers through Eiji’s body because he still looks like the same graceful man Sing met almost three years ago. Only, he can clearly see how much happier Eiji looks. Brightness is overflowing from his presence.

As if he can feel their eyes on him, Eiji slowly turns his head to their direction. A big, warm smile spreads on his face and he starts speeding up towards them. “Yue! Sing!”

Yut-Lung wraps his arms around Eiji at once and clings. Seeing them like this again brings a lump to Sing’s throat. He remembers very well how important Eiji’s support was for them to adapt to their new life and now, meeting him again brings back so many good memories.

“Oh Yue, you’re as pretty as ever.” Eiji says softly, caressing his friend’s back.

Yut-Lung chokes out a little laugh, finally moving back. “I know,” he says while he tries to secretly dry his tears. “I’m the only bitch in this world who can manage to look fabulous after a thirteen hour long flight.”

Eiji laughs genuinely before he throws himself at Sing. “And you!” he gasps. “As tall as ever! You’re practically a tree!”

Sing speaks in his most serious fake-respectful tone. “Or maybe you’re just too short, sir.”

He grins when Eiji tries to elbow him in the stomach like he expected.

“My God, let’s go home,” Eiji says after he pulls back. “You guys look dead on your feet.”

“You have no idea,” Sing murmurs as he takes their suitcases.

He sees Eiji has a nice but not too fancy car outside, waiting for them. At this point, Ash’s absence is more than clear. Sing finally decides to ask when he notices Yut-Lung anxiously wrapping a finger around his hair. “Where’s Ash?”

Eiji bites his lips. “He wanted me to give you his apologies. He had a thing he needed to handle, so he’ll only join us late at night.”

“That’s fine.” Sing replies in a friendly tone. Out of the corner of his eye, he sees Yut-Lung’s shoulders visibly relaxing.

Eiji does the most of talking on their way to the house since Yut-Lung practically falls asleep in the back. Sing answers Eiji’s chatter occasionally but more than anything, his eyes are drawn to the amazing scenery. Eiji smiles like an angel when he tells him this.

Yut-Lung wakes up just as they pull up in the driveway. Sing gets out of the car to take their suitcases and lets out a low whistle when his eyes fall on the house.

It’s not huge, by all means. Its size is nothing compared to the previous mansion they lived in. But it’s clear Ash and Eiji spent a lot of money on this cozy and elegant looking house. Front porch is sparkling with various flowers –even in winter— and Sing can barely see the winter garden behind the house.

“Let’s head inside.” Eiji urges softly.

Sweet and warm air hits their faces the moment they step inside. Sing’s losing himself in the smell of peanut butter cookies when he hears an excited bark. He immediately falls onto his knees to hug the friendly golden retriever.

“Hello sweetie, hi.” Sing coos at the dog’s panting face. Even Yut-Lung, an established cat person, gives the dog a few pats on the head.

“Buddy is such a kind boy.” Eiji says in a proud manner. “Although I can’t say the same about the cat. I don’t know where she is, she only makes an appearance when she wants to.”

“As she should be.” Yut-Lung says smugly, but then he sways on where’s standing and Sing quickly catches him.

“Yue, I already prepared your bedroom.” Eiji quickly comes to support him. “Would you like to sleep a little?”

Yut-Lung looks a little hesitant. “I mean, I’m already jet-lagged. It’ll fuck up my sleep pattern even more.”

Sing presses a gentle kiss to his temple. “I’ll wake you up a few hours later.”

With Yut-Lung finally agreeing, Eiji tells Sing to wait for him in the living room while he shows Yut-Lung the way. Buddy turns out to be a smart dog as he leads Sing there and then jumps into his lap the moment Sing sits down on the comfy couch. Sing buries his hand to his silky fur and closes his eyes for a little nap…

He wakes up to the smell of coffee and cookies, Buddy still on his lap. Eiji gives him a little smile when he extends Sing his cup of coffee. He can’t stop himself from feeling emotional when he realizes Eiji still remembers how he takes his coffee.

“He fell asleep the moment his head hit the pillow.” Eiji giggles.

Sing huffs a laugh. “I mean, I can’t blame him. I’ll probably fall asleep in the shower.”

Eiji wrinkles his nose. “Please don’t. You just got here, I don’t want you to drown in the shower.”

Sing lets out a genuine laugh at this, then takes a sip from his mug. It tastes heavenly.

“You know…” Eiji says softly. “It’s really nice to see you guys again…”

He looks at him for a long time while he continues slowly petting Buddy. “You…” Sing starts hesitantly. “You never told us what actually happened.”

Eiji’s beautiful face tenses for a brief moment before he sighs deeply. “Where do I start…”

Sing’s coffee is finished by the time Eiji stops talking. The air inside is warm, and his coffee was also hot, yet Sing feels cold from head to toe. He hides his shaking fingers in Buddy’s fur. “That’s…”

“I know.” Eiji whispers when his voice trails off.

“We guessed something else happened.” Sing finally chokes out the words. “Something other than what the press said. But this… This must’ve been a nightmare for you.”

“I don’t want to think about it anymore.” Eiji’s voice is thick with tears. “I really, really don’t.” Frustrated, he wipes his tears away and gives Sing another little smile. “Tell me about your life in Berlin.”

So Sing does, in an unhurried and soft tone. He talks of his graduation from university this year, of his part time job as a barista, of Yut-Lung teaching Cantonese to various people for a living, of anything and everything.

When he finishes, Eiji sighs very lightly. “Do you ever fear all of this is just a temporary dream? That we’ll wake up eventually?”

“No.” Sing’s answer is quick and certain. “This is real. And we deserve it.”


 A wet touch to his cheek wakes him up.

At first, Yut-Lung is so, so confused; so he keeps his eyes closed. But when a minute or two passes and the feeling of someone licking his cheek continues, he gradually opens is eyes and meets with a pair of pitch black eyes.

“Oh hello,” Yut-Lung coos, voice still raspy from sleeping. “You came to bless me?”

The beautiful cat purrs and rubs her little head under Yut-Lung’s chin. Their bliss doesn’t last long, however, when the door opens and Eiji walks in with a disapproving look on his face. “Nefertiti, how did you even get in here? Are you harassing our guest?”

Nefertiti makes an annoyed sound. Yut-Lung quickly pets her black fur. “Not harassment, little dove. She was just making sure about customer happiness.”

Eiji chuckles, sitting on the bed to pet the cat as well. “What a good girl.” Quietly, he asks: “Do you miss Persephone?”

An old twinge grips Yut-Lung’s heart. “Everyday. But she’s happy with Shorter and Cain now, I don’t want to snatch her from her home again.”

Eiji hums in understanding. Together, they pet Nefertiti for a while before she gets bored of the attention and leaves the room in a sudden movement. They look after her with surprised eyes before bursting into laugher.

“You look better,” Eiji says gently once their laughter fades away. “Sleep must’ve helped.”

“Oh definitely,” Yut-Lung grunts, stretching on the bed like a big cat. “I feel sixty percent more human now.”

Eiji huffs a laugh, but then he looks down on him with a serious look in his dark brown eyes. “Ash came back, by the way.”

The effect of his words is immediate. For a long, painful moment, Yut-Lung lays frozen on the bed. “Can I take a shower before I meet him?” he asks slowly.

Eiji’s mouth curls with an unhappy frown. “Yue, please don’t act like you’re a man on death sentence. You don’t have to talk to him if you—“

“Well, it’d be quite ridiculous if I don’t speak with him when I came all this way to stay in his house, don’t you think?” Yut-Lung snaps at him, old anger coming to surface, but his voice softens in the next sentence. “I want to talk to him. But I’ll take a shower first.”

Eiji looks at him for a long moment before he stands up. “I’ll put some clean towels for you.”

Yut-Lung doesn’t see Sing before or after his shower. He’s a little disappointed, but he knows it’s a good thing because he’s not sure he wouldn’t hide himself in Sing’s huge embrace if he saw him.

When he’s done, Yut-Lung puts his long hair in a bun and takes a few minutes to just breathe in and out before he leaves the room.

He finds Ash easily enough. Snow started falling again when he was asleep but it’s mostly mixed with heavy rain. Nefertiti is napping on the couch while Ash absently pets her as he watches the rain outside.

Like Eiji, Ash also didn’t change a lot. Maybe his features are a little sharper now. His hair is definitely longer, but nowhere near as long as Yut-Lung’s.

Then Ash turns his head and their eyes meet.

After a few painfully awkward seconds, Ash gives him a light nod. “Hello, Yut-Lung. I apologize for not welcoming you at the airport.”

“It’s fine.” Yut-Lung’s voice sounds too high pitched even for his own ears. “Eiji said you had a thing to handle.”

“I did.”

They quiet down again for a while. Eventually, Ash pats the space next to him in silence. Yut-Lung goes, very slowly, and gently sits down to not wake Nefertiti. The two of them refuse to look at each other, eyes trained on the glass window to watch the rain.

Yut-Lung lets out a very light sigh. “Can I speak first?”

Ash only hesitates for a second. “Of course.”

Even know, Yut-Lung can’t look at his face. “I want to start by apologizing.”

Ash is silent.

“I’m sorry,” Yut-Lung says softly. “I should’ve said this a long, long time ago. You didn’t deserve the way I treated you after my mom’s death. For the longest time, I saw you as some sort of villain… You didn’t deserve any of this.”

The sound of heavy rain. And then—

A shaky exhale leaves Ash’s mouth. “I’m not gonna say it's okay or it didn’t hurt,” he whispers. “Because it did. You were my best friend and you suddenly started to behave like I was your enemy when all I wanted was to be there for you.”

Tears pool down in Yut-Lung’s eyes. “I know.”

Ash finally turns to look at him but Yut-Lung still doesn’t have the courage to meet his eyes.

“But, damn it, I hurt you so bad too, Yue,” Ash says, regret coloring his voice. “When I remember how I treated you at my mother’s funeral…”

“You were in mourning—“

“That doesn’t excuse it.” Ash snaps. “You finally made a move to reach me again and I…”

A few treacherous tears escape from Yut-Lung’s eyes. Ash notices and his voice considerably softens.

“Remember our last conversation? The one we had before you ran away with Sing? You were right. I could have tried harder. I should have tried harder.” Ash sounds bitter. “So, I’m sorry too. Very sorry.”

Trying his best to be quiet, Yut-Lung sniffs.

He freezes when he feels Ash’s hand on his shoulder. Finally turning his eyes to him, he sees Ash’s eyes are also shining with tears.

“We lost so many years of friendship because of our stupid pride.” Ash says. “I want to be your friend again, if you let me.”

Yut-Lung looks at him with big eyes for a long minute before a weak sob leaves his mouth and he wraps his arms around Ash. Nefertiti meows, clearly annoyed, and jumps from the couch. For once, no one pays attention to her.

“Yes, I want to be your friend again.” Yut-Lung chokes out. “God, all this time, it was this simple…”

“I know.” Ash says soothingly. “Guess we’re just two stubborn idiots.”

They sit there for the rest of the night, talking about anything they can think of. Yut-Lung bursts into tears once again when he learns Griffin is actually alive. The shock he feels is strong, but inside of him, a little part keeps whispering I knew it. Griffin Callenreese’s “death” always sounded too suspicious for him.

He tells Ash about his mother’s sacrifice, about Wang-Lung preventing him from taking the money he rightfully owns.

“I’ll have my lawyers look into this.” Ash says seriously.

“No need.” Yut-Lung exhales deeply. “He’s not worth it. His worthless life is going to end someday, sooner or later. Until that time, I won’t deal with him again.” He continues softly. “I’m happy now. I have a job I love. I have the man I love with me. I don’t need anything else.”

Ash’s eyes turns impossibly fond.

There’s more tears, more apologies, more regrets. But at the end of the might, Yut-Lung feels much lighter than he did for a long time.

When he goes to bed, Sing’s strong arms are there to wrap around him.

“Hello, mooncake,” Sing whispers against his neck, his breath tickling Yut-Lung’s neck. “Everything okay?”

Yut-Lung lifts his head to kiss him quietly. “Everything okay.”

The rest of their stay passes in an uneventful and peaceful tempo. Izumo is truly beautiful like Eiji told him many times, and it’s clear Ash and Eiji are still considerably rich despite donating most of their money, so they spend quite a generous amount of money to treat Yut-Lung and Sing like they’re royalty, despite the younger couple’s protests.

(Yut-Lung won’t lie, it isn’t so bad to eat and travel without worrying about their monthly budget for once.)

Two days before they are set to leave, Eiji throws them a barbeque party and cooks enough food to feed a small army and Ash opens a couple of expensive bottles of wine.

Yut-Lung tries not to feel spoiled and fails.

“This is so nice,” Sing moans around grilled garlic steak. “We’re going to visit often if you promise to feed us like this every time.”

“Of course.” Eiji says gently. “But thirteen hour long plane ride just for free food?”

“Details.” Yut-Lung says carelessly as he sips his wine.

All of sudden, Ash’s voice comes from the inside. “Yeah, hold on. Can’t believe I’m doing this…” he murmurs and a moment later he steps out, carrying his laptop. “Hey everyone, someone wants to join us for dinner.”

“Hello everyoooooone!” an obnoxious voice singsongs the moment Ash turns the screen to them.

“Boss!” Sing cries excitedly.

Yut-Lung gasps loudly. “My baby!”

“Hello Sing, hello my dear Eiji and hello Yut-Lung.” Shorter says smugly, lifting the paw of the cat on his lap to wave at them. “Didn’t know you liked me enough to call me baby, Yue.”

Yut-Lung scowls in disgust. “I was obviously talking to Persephone, you idiot.”

They hear a sighing coming from behind Shorter and a moment later, Cain appears on the screen. “Good evening everyone, sorry for bothering your pleasant evening but Shorter insisted on dining together. Even though, you know, you’re in Japan. And we’re in New York. And it’s morning here.”

Shorter visibly pouts on the screen while Ash rubs his temples. “No fun allowed.” He perks up quickly again. “So, Eiji, please show me the feast you prepared.”

As Eiji happily explains everything he’s cooked to Shorter and Ash interrupts once in a while to bicker with Shorter; Yut-Lung leans into Sing’s warmth, sips his fine wine and enjoys the beauty of being surrendered by people he loves.


 If there’s a heaven, Eiji thinks softly. Then it must be this.

A few weeks after Sing and Yut-Lung leaves, the snow returns. And this time, it feels like it has no intention to stop anytime soon. Ash’s body is still adjusting to different Izumo climate, even after two years, so he catches a common cold and commits himself to bed rest.

(With a lot of nagging from Eiji, of course.)

Right now, their fireplace cozily roars with a strong fire while Ash lays on top Eiji like a lazy cat as Eiji reads to him. Their actual cat is also napping on the silky golden fur of their poor dog.

Then one day, it all came to an end.” Eiji continues reading softly, a slight frown appearing on his face. “It was that simple, it ended so abruptly that I failed to grasp the enormity of what had happened…” With a sigh, he shuts the book. “This is sad, Ash. Did you choose this book to make me cry?”

“What? Nooooo.” Ash says innocently, like he doesn’t like it when Eiji gets too emotional that he sheds a few tears and Ash gently wipes them away. “I just think it has a beautiful love story. The kind of love story you like.”

Eiji gives him a fake stern look and places Madonna In a Fur Coat on their table. He gently presses his lips against Ash’s forehead, feeling anxious when he feels his husband still has a fever.

“You know, maybe we shouldn’t cuddle. We need to bring your temperature do—“

No.” Before he can even finish his suggestion, Ash’s arms wraps tighter around him, like some kind of overly clingy koala. “I don’t care if my fever goes up to 110 F, I’m not leaving my comfy pillow.” He rolls his eyes when Eiji opens his mouth to protest. “Bambi, relax. I already took my medicine, we just need to give it time. Now, cuddle with me, please?

So Eiji has no choice but to indulge. His hands tenderly caress Ash’s back, burying his nose into Ash’s sunflower hair. He loves Ash like this; warm and soft and relaxed and cuddly. He just wishes he wasn’t ill.

Ash smugly rubs his face against Eiji’s neck. “I’m totally infecting this flu on you.”

Ah, yes. His dearest husband who happened to be a giant asshole sometimes.

Eiji smiles fondly and roughly pinches Ash’s butt, making him shrike a laugh. They quiet down after a while and just watch the snow outside in a peaceful silence.

“You know, if you’re not gonna read that book to me,” Ash says, pausing to blow his nose out. “Then you should at least tell me story.”

Eiji gives a thoughtful hum. “What kind of a story do you want?”

Ash thinks about it for a long moment. “Tell me a story of other Ash and Eijis.”

Eiji blinks in confusion. “What?”

“You know, from parallel universes,” Ash says a little impatiently, his green eyes shining with excitement. “For example, in one universe; I’m a gang leader in New York and you’re the assistant of a journalist who came from Japan to interview me. That’s how we met and fell in love.”

Eiji stands frozen for a long, very long time before he bursts into loud laughter. Nefertiti wakes up to give him a nasty look and then immediately goes back to sleep. Ash’s glare is much more intense.

“Baby,” he coos at Ash’s angry face. “You have such a vivid imagination. Have you been reading Agatha Christie novels lately?”

Ash hides his face in Eiji’s chest. “You’re such a jerk.”

“No, no, it’s wonderful.” Eiji quickly makes up to him. “A gang leader and a journalist. Star-crossed lovers. I love it.”

“Glad you see the appeal.” Ash sniffs, deciding to face him again. “Now you tell me about a different Ash and Eiji.”

“Like… from a parallel universe?”

“Yeah.”

“Oh, I don’t know if I’m good at this…” Eiji says thoughtfully, urging Ash to lay in a more comfortable position. When Ash rests his ear right on top Eiji’s heart; Eiji starts carding his hand through his husband's golden strands, closes his eyes and starts talking.

“Once upon a time, there was a guy named Eiji. His parents died when he was a teenager, so he was living in his evil aunt’s castle with his little sister.”

Ash shuffles in his embrace a little but he doesn’t interrupt.

“One day, Eiji’s entire world came crushing on him because apparently, his evil aunt had promised his hand in marriage to a man Eiji’s never seen before.”

“Poor Eiji.” Ash mutters in misery.

Eiji kisses his husband’s ring finger before he continues. “With a heavy heart, Eiji left his country behind to face the unknown. When he came to his new house, he met the guy who was going to be his husband and…”

Ash’s breath quickens when Eiji pauses dramatically. “And?”

“And he was charmed, for the prince was the most handsome man Eiji’s ever seen, and he also carried the world’s gentlest heart.” Eiji says, voice impossibly soft. “It wasn’t love at first sight but it was definitely trust at first sight, because the prince promised to keep Eiji safe from everything.”

A soft, shaky chuckle escapes from Ash’s mouth and he sounds small when he opens his mouth. “And love? Did they fall in love eventually?”

“Yes. Eiji found the love of his life and his soulmate in prince.”

Ash sighs in bliss before he gets up and wraps his arms around Eiji’s neck, kissing him sweetly on the lips. Somehow, Eiji takes the taste of their very first kiss: green tea and jasmine.

Ash rests his forehead against Eiji’s when they part. “And they lived happily ever after?”

Eiji is smiling seconds before he kisses Ash again. “And they lived happily ever after.”

Notes:

where do i even start...

i'm going to be honest with you: i genuinely didn't expect a lot of people to read satin birds when i first started it because it was going to be an angsty fic and i thought "well, i think people had enough angst after bf finale..." but WOW, never in my wildest dreams i expected such a lovely and positive feedback! writing satin birds was a tough experience for me, sometimes i thought i was never going to finish it but i did. all because of your support and kind words. i'm so glad i was able to share this fic with you. ❤️

with my deepest gratitude and love,

-idil. ❤️