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English
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Published:
2024-02-18
Updated:
2024-02-18
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3,273
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4/?
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A Flaw In Our Chemistry

Chapter Text

Trelawny set the bag of supplies down as quietly as possible. An apple rolled off the table, causing Arthur to break free from Dutch and stare around the room wildly, his pulse immediately spiking. 

Danger, danger, danger.

"It's just me, Arthur!" Josiah held up both hands and waited for the other Outlaw to relax. How did Arthur go from the man he once knew, so strong and steady, to... this? 

A mere shadow of his former self.

Dutch. 

Dutch and his stupid plans. If Trelawny was a braver man, he would confront the gang leader and give him a piece of his mind! How dare he get Arthur kidnapped by Colm bloody O'Driscoll. 

But he wasn't - and so he settled for glaring at him instead.  "I saw some of Colm's boys in Rhodes."

Dutch's expression immediately hardened, hands twitching over the gun's he had holstered. He could take them all on; the adrenaline pumping through his veins told him so. 

"Don't be naive." Josiah responded, seeing the slightly manic look in Dutch's eye. "You'd be walking into yet another trap." 

"You expect me to just... let them live? After what they put Arthur through?" 

Arthur rubbed his forehead. "M'fine."

But neither men listened, both staring intensely at each other. They both meant well, Arthur knew that, but he wasn't a damn baby. 

"They wouldn't have gotten to Arthur if it wasn't for yo-..." Trelawny tried to stop himself, his expression suddenly sheepish, but Dutch knew.

Furious now, he stalked towards the door. "So, it's my fault? I tried to make peace, Trelawny! Yes, it backfired but my intentions were good! I thought if Colm and I could put our past behind us, then that would be one less reason to constantly look over our shoulder all the time!"

"And yet, you only succeeded in giving them Arthur to play with and spit back out!"

Arthur watched them both guiltily. Colm and Dutch would never be friends again... and it was all his fault. 

And if he told Dutch the truth about Annabel... 

"Can ya both please shut up?!" He was tense now, his eyes betraying him if either man looked into them. "It's not Dutch's fault, Josiah, it's mine."

"Dear boy, how could it possibly be your fault?" 

Avoiding Dutch's curious gaze, Arthur murmured. "Not the ambush, but..." Say it, don't say it, say it you coward, "The reason we hate them, and vice versa..." God, he was stalling and terrified.

"Colm killed Annabel." Dutch said softly, the pain in his voice making Arthur's jealousy raise its ugly head. 

Do it, do it, do it.

"Because I gave her to him." 

There was silence. Trelawny frowned in confusion whilst Dutch remained unresponsive. Arthur could see the gears going around in his head, and waited. Maybe now was the time to run...

"What do you mean?" Dutch replied finally, now looking at Arthur as though he barely knew him. His Arthur would never give the love of his life to Colm! No, this had to be some sort of misunderstanding. 

But then he remembered Colm's letter, and Arthur's feelings towards him. Would he do that?

"Colm gave me an ultimatum - ages ago now, when I was young and dumb - give him Annabel or kiss the gang goodbye." 

"So you..."

"Chose the least painful option, yes."

Losing one person compared to his whole family was an easy choice back then. Annabel or Hosea, John and Dutch? 

"I see."

Dutch almost stumbled out of the door, and Arthur desperately wanted to stop him - to beg for some sort of forgiveness - but he couldn't move. The truth was out now and it broke one of the chains Colm had on him, but at what price? 

"Dutch, where are ya going?" 

"I just... need to think. Josiah, watch him."