Chapter Text
WARNINGS: Verbal abuse, start of an unhealthy relationship – neither of which I condone. Also I love Mark’s character and this is not meant to bash him in any way – it’s just part of the plot.
DISCLAIMER: I own nothing, just a fan of The Inbetweeners.
The sun was shining brightly, it was warm and the air held only a mild breeze that felt pleasant on my skin. Mark had rolled the windows down in the car to let some cool air in, which was strange considering what he had told me about the weather. As Mark was driving down the street that led away from my house, I looked at him. “Mark, I would have been fine in the other outfit I had on. Why did you say that I would freeze when you know it’s not true?”
Mark’s grip on the steering wheel grew tighter, until I could see his knuckles blanching. His whole body seemed to tense up, and a frown settled on his face. “Come on, Jane...You’re a clever girl, but you’re not street smart, are you? You looked like a cheap tart, I hate to say that to you but it’s the truth. Imagine what would happen if you were out on some dark street alone dressed like that without me to protect you? You could get hurt; guys might think you’re a slapper. It’s just not a good look for a bright, decent girl like you.”
I was taken aback by his hurtful remark, and I just stared at him for a few moments before I looked out of the window. I knew Mark had not liked what I wore in my room, but I had not known that he hated it so much. I was so stunned by what he told me that I kept silent as I was not sure what to say back. I felt uneasy, confused, and part of me wondered if he was right.
After all, I knew I was a little naïve when it came to the outside world, as Mum did her best to coddle and protect me and my brother as much as she could. I was touched that Mark was so concerned about my safety, but that still did not justify what he had said. Mark had practically insulted me, not directly but even indirectly it was horrible to hear. Especially from a guy I liked, and I did like him a lot despite the fact I still liked Jay. And I wondered if Mark had picked up on that, if he had some idea I liked Jay. I hoped he had no idea, but I was not sure.
When Mark parked the car, I could see we were at the big cinema I rarely went to as usually I went to the cinema which was located in the Waterside shopping centre. As I unlatched my seatbelt, Mark had already gotten out of the car and he quickly ran around to open my door for me, which I thought was very sweet. I was a little nervous, as it was my first ever date, and I hoped it would be the first of many. “Thanks, Mark.” I smiled up at him as I stepped out of the car, but my smile soon faded away as I kept thinking back to what he had said and unease settled over me again.
“You’re upset, yeah?” Mark asked, as he locked up the car. He gently pulled me to him and kissed the top of my head before he held me at arm’s length and stared down into my eyes intently. “Don’t be sad, Jane. I’m sorry if I hurt your feelings, but I had to tell you how I felt seeing you in that state. Why the sudden change in the way you look? Makes no sense to me. You look beautiful just the way you are, curly hair and the way you dress all proper and modest. That’s part of why I like you, ’cause you’re not a fake beauty. You’re just naturally pretty, you don’t need skimpy clothes, a new haircut or to slather on a truckload of makeup like a lot of the girls do. Like my exes did.”
Mark really seemed to believe what he was telling me, and I wanted desperately to believe him too. It was not that what he told me negated his earlier hurtful comments to me, but it did go a long way to help soothe my unease and hurt, like a cooling balm being applied over a patch of sore, irritated skin. And it made me really happy to think that Mark could genuinely like me just as I am, unlike Jay who had only shown interest in me after I changed how I looked.
“That’s a really nice thing for you to say, Mark. No one’s ever thought that about me before, and I appreciate it so much. It’s just...” I hesitated, shrugging off his hold on me and stepping backwards. “I didn’t like how you talked to me earlier. I know you were just worried about me, but you came very close to insulting me. You made me feel uncomfortable, and upset. I’m going to forgive you, because you apologized but I hope you don’t make a habit of talking to me like that, alright?”
“Jane, don’t you think you’re being a bit sensitive?” Mark chuckled as he pulled me close to his side, his hand firmly holding my waist as he brushed a kiss past my cheek and started guiding me through the carpark. “I admit I was a little out of line, but I didn’t mean any harm. Sometimes, I’m just quite blunt with my words but don’t take it to heart. Let’s just enjoy our date, yeah?”
I nodded slowly, smiling tentatively as I wound my arm loosely around Mark’s waist. “Enjoy it? Hmm, I don’t know...” I teased him. “If you’re taking me to see that awful film set in space this is going to be our last date.”
“Nah, of course not. I know just the kind of movie you like.” Mark replied with a confident grin. He let go of me once we reached the foyer of the cinema and went to the self-service ticket machine after telling me to stand near the pick & mix sweets as he wanted the movie to be a surprise for me. I looked over the sweets with little interest, but I was tempted by the outrageously expensive large popcorn and drink combo. I quickly queued up to buy the combo, deciding to get sweet popcorn and a Coke. Just at the time I was being asked if I wanted to add anything else to the combo, Mark strolled up the counter. “Yeah, chuck in some Revels, mate.” Mark nudged me with his elbow gently. “Jane, put your money away. It’s on me.”
“Oh no, Mark, I want to pay,” I protested, as I opened up my purse and pulled out a twenty pound note to hand over to the cinema assistant. “You paid for the tickets, let me pay for the treats.”
Mark snatched the money out of my hand just as the assistant reached for it, instead giving the assistant a crumpled up ten pound note from his jeans with some loose pound coins. The assistant tried to give him back some pennies but Mark did not want them. “Keep the change, yeah?” Mark stuffed my money back into my purse, handing me the popcorn and the packet of Revels before picking up the drink and ushering me over to have our tickets checked. Once we entered Screen 4, where our film was being shown, Mark pointed to the left side of the screen. “Let’s sit over there.”
I hesitated, remaining on one spot even as Mark tried to pull me along. “Mark, wait. Why don’t we sit in the middle centre row?”
Mark seemed put out by my request, and he sighed heavily. “I guess...if that’s really what you want.”
By the time we moved up to the middle row, I felt bad so I gently pulled Mark over to the side seats instead. “No, we can sit on the side. It doesn’t really make that much difference.” I lied, as I never sat on the side rows if I could help it. It just made no sense to me; I could sit with a lovely, direct view of the screen or have to turn my head for a view that was slightly inferior. But I could see how much Mark wanted to sit on the side, and I wanted him to be happy.
“Are you sure, Jane? I don’t mind, really, we can sit in the middle if you want,” Mark smiled at me ruefully, squeezing my hand. “Sorry if I seem a bit off, I’m just...a bit on edge. It’s our first proper date and I want it to be a good one.”
I nodded, feeling more relaxed now I knew Mark was a little nervous, just like I was. “Yes, I’m sure.”
“Great, because I hate sitting in the middle,” Mark seemed more cheerful as we settled down in seats near the front and on the left side. “Want some popcorn?”
“Maybe in a little bit,” I replied, a pleasant warmth spreading though me as Mark brought his arm up to drape it over my shoulder. “I’m just going to switch off my phone now.” When I looked at my phone I saw a text from Will, giving me a code word to send him if I needed to be rescued. It made me laugh as I texted him back, though I knew he meant well he was mistaken about Mark. I knew Mark would not want to harm me; there was more chance of a stranger hurting me than him.
“Who are you texting?” Mark asked nonchalantly, but by the way he looked at me I knew he really wanted to know. “It’s not that tosser Jay, is it?”
“No, Jay doesn’t even have my number,” I replied quickly, although it was not true. Jay had just called me once in the past, after Will got so drunk he almost passed out at a party and ended up staying the night there. But I was sure Jay had not even bothered to save my number in his phone. “Let’s not talk about him.”
“So who is it?” Mark asked again, giving me a hard, interrogative stare. “Tell me, Jane.”
“Just my brother. He wanted to - Hey!” I exclaimed in surprise, when Mark pulled my phone out of my hands and looked at the screen. “Mark, give me my phone back.”
Mark hesitated before he gave me the phone back. “I shouldn’t have done that, Jane. But I know he likes you, and I can’t stand it ’cause you’re mine.”
“What?” I laughed uneasily. “No, Mark. I’m not his type at all...”
“Yeah, sure.” He withdrew his arm from around my shoulders and gave me a sullen look before he stared up at the screen.
I turned off my phone and put it away. The trailers and commercials had just ended but I could not tear my eyes away from Mark. I felt really bad and there was an uncomfortable tension between us that I wanted to alleviate. Although I did not like what Mark had done, I understood why he had done it. I knew I would be just as unhappy as Mark if I saw another girl eyeing him up like she wanted him. And that was how Jay had looked at me, although I knew it wasn’t me he wanted.
Jay would never fancy me like I fancied him. So I had to do my best to forget about him and focus on Mark, who liked me just as I was. Despite his rough edges, Mark really cared about me and I did not want to lose the chance to have a relationship with him. I knew that Mark could easily date any number of girls with his attractive face and bad boy vibes, but he wanted me and I wanted him too.
I tentatively kissed him on the cheek, and I was soon rewarded when I saw his face break out into a reluctant smile. Seeing his smile made me feel a lot better, and I turned to look at the screen. I was thrilled when I realized it was the latest film adaption of Jane Eyre. I watched with rapt attention throughout the showing, and Mark did his best to keep his attention on the screen though I could tell it was not the type of movie he enjoyed watching – he looked quite bored and had yawned more than once.
After the film ended, Mark suggested we go to Nando’s to eat, and I quickly agreed as I loved the chicken there. It did not take us long to walk from the cinema over to the Nando’s, as there was a few restaurants grouped around the cinema. When we got settled down in our seats, I did not even bother to check the menu as I already knew what I wanted. “I don’t know if I’ll be able to finish my food after I had all that popcorn. What are you going to eat?”
“Half a chicken, medium heat, with some peri-peri chips and a bottomless Coke.” Mark stretched his arm across the table to take hold of my hand and smiled at me. “And then we could share a slice of caramel cheesecake for dessert? Sound good, babe?”
“I...” I hesitated, a little flustered from the use of a pet name. Carli’s boyfriend was always calling her babe and I had thought it was annoying, but somehow it was different to hear the word come from Mark, directed to me. “Yes, I’d like that.” I returned Mark’s smile as I stood up from my seat and took note of our table number. “So let me go and order, then we can chat some more.” I tried to walk away but Mark refused to let go. I laughed softly as I attempted to pull my hand away. “Mark, we can hold hands later, there’s a queue forming at the till.”
Mark frowned at me, and then shook his head slowly. “Nah, sit down and tell me what you want. It’s gonna be my treat.”
“No. Let me pay, you already paid for the film and the snacks.”
“Jane...” Mark looked hurt, and then he gave me a deeply reproachful look as he dropped his hold on my hand. “Do you think I can’t afford it? Do you think I live in some grotty little flat where my mum gets dole handouts? I mean, it wouldn’t surprise me if you did think like that. You went to boarding school, that’s where you got your posh accent. You’re just like your twat of a brother, looking down his nose at me like I’m scum. Am I right?”
I quickly sat back down in my seat, somehow feeling like the breath had been knocked out of me by his words. I was stunned that he could think that about me. I hastily shook my head. “No, Mark, that’s not true at all.” I felt horrible, even though I had never looked down on Mark before, it hurt me to realize that he thought I had. “And you’re probably better off than me, to be honest. After my parents split up...” I hesitated, not wanting to bring up the old wounds of my parents’ divorce again. “Look, it doesn’t matter. I don’t really like to talk about it so let’s just...forget it. I’m sorry if I upset you, but you can’t talk about Will like that.” I was no longer in the mood to eat. A sense of unease was sweeping over me again. This was now the second time Mark had cut into me painfully with his words. “Forget the food. Can you just take me home, please?”
“I don’t want our first date to end like this,” Mark replied, as his face crumpled. He took hold of my hands, his brown eyes piercing into mine as he stared at me intently. “You don’t need to apologize, it’s all my fault. I’m really sorry. I didn’t mean what I said; I know you’re not like that. And...it was wrong of me to disrespect your brother. I’ll take you home, but only if you promise to let me take you out on a second date.”
I shook my head slowly as I stood up and pulled my hands out of Mark’s hold. “I don’t know, Mark. I’ll have to think about it, but right now I’m going to go home. Are you going to take me, or do I need to call a mini cab?”
“No, I’ll take you.” Mark stood up from his seat and held out his hand to me with a rueful smile. “Let’s walk out together, yeah?”
After a few moments I took hold of his hand. I would have felt like I was rejecting him if I had not done so, but I was still not happy with the way he had acted. After he had driven me home, I quickly got of the car before Mark could walk around to me. “I’ll see you at school, Mark. Thank you for taking me out.”
As I walked up to my front door, I heard the sound of Mark’s car door slamming shut. I had only taken a few steps when he caught up to me and pulled me around to face him. “Goodnight, Jane.” He leant down and quickly pressed his lips against mine. My heart rate picked up slightly. His lips were a little chapped, and warm against my own. His kiss felt strange but also pleasant. I stood there frozen for a few moments, and he looked past me to the house before he leant down to kiss me again.
This time I reacted and stepped back before his lips could touch mine again. “Don’t do that, Mark.”
“Why? You didn’t like it?” Mark asked, reaching for my hand and squeezing it gently before he let go. “I know I did.”
Although he had taken me by surprise, I had liked his kiss. But I was still upset with him, and that was not how I wanted to remember my first kiss. I looked back at the house and saw my brother and his friends staring at us through the living room window. Will looked disgusted, Neil had his usual vacant smile, Simon had a wide eyed look of astonishment and Jay had a sour expression on his face. I turned back to Mark, feeling a little embarrassed. “Did you know they were looking at us?”
“No!” Mark exclaimed fervently. “I just really wanted to kiss you before I go.” He glared past me, at the boys who were still staring at us, and drew a line with his finger across his throat. Simon hastily drew the curtains shut as the other boys ducked down out of view.
I pulled Mark’s hand down from his face. “Don’t threaten them, Mark...” I gave him a reproachful look, but then I burst into laughter. I was not sure that Mark was telling the truth, but I chose to believe him. I could not stand to think about my first kiss being used just to annoy my brother. “It was funny to see how they reacted, though.”
“Yeah, it was...” Mark smiled at me before he walked away, back to his car. “I’ll pick you up on Monday for school, ok?” He called out to me. Then he got into his car.
“No, Mark, that’s not...” My protest faded into nothing as Mark shut the car door and drove away. I sighed as I let myself into the house. I wondered if he had not heard me or if he had just pretended not to hear me. As I leant back against the door, I touched my lips. I felt excited for more kisses with Mark in the future, especially as I had not fully immersed myself in our first kiss. My eyes had not even been closed. But I also felt wistful too, because I had hoped Jay would be my first kiss, even though I knew it would not happen – and now it never could happen. I was trying so hard to bury my feelings for Jay and I did not understand why it was so difficult to do so. After all, it was not like we had even dated. All I had with Jay was a one sided crush that had just made me feel miserable. We had nothing between us. But I could still picture the look on Jay’s face when he had seen Mark kissing me, so sour like he had been forced to drink raw lemon juice. I did not think it was jealousy, just his dislike of Mark, and I despised myself for wanting him to be jealous.
Because it would mean he felt something other than complete indifference towards me.
Thanks for reading :)