Chapter Text
At Claire's suggestion of going to a therapist Matt almost leaves without getting all his injuries taken care of, so she makes him promise that he would visit his priest at least and talk to him. Jessica doesn't know how that would help, but if it's a way for him to cope, she is the last one who should be judging his methods.
He doesn't want to say what was done to him and he is very conscious about hiding his injuries as much as possible this time. His captors tried to keep him alive to the end and they probably didn't know how much he would be able to bear, so maybe it could have been worse physically. But emotionally it is a different story. They had him for days, told him all the stuff they wanted to do to his friends and allies. And they also used him for a political game. As it turns out, the man Matt was counting on to fight corruption was working with Fisk and he won the election.
Beaten again way more than half to death, morals compromised, used and hopes disillusioned, Daredevil needs to take a break for a while. There is also a strange distance between him and Trish, but Jessica warned her that this would not be easy. Maybe that Elektra episode did end their little fling after all. Foggy has been writing to her secretly to discuss why their friends act like this. But it's not her problem. What is she supposed to do about it?
Foggy: Jessica, we cannot let it end like that. Matty is miserable.
Jessica: No shit. He was tortured for five days, did you want him to party?
Foggy: I want him to be glad that he's alive. He acts like rescuing him wasn't worth the effort.
Jessica: If he is being ungrateful I'll come over to beat sense into him.
Foggy: Did Trish say why she broke up with him?
Jessica: She didn't as far as I know. Maybe she's just giving him some space to heal.
Foggy: Or maybe he's giving her "space". But those idiots need fucking less space! I'm not complaining that my best friend is spending time with me again, without a threat to my life instead of him just doing his bodyguard duty on my couch. All I'm saying is: When has space ever solved any problems?
Jessica: Right now, space is all there is between my fist and your dickhead. Stop texting.
After a couple of minutes in which Jessica and Trish could catch up on some mindless TV show, Jessica hears her phone indicating another message from Foggy. She tries to ignore it, but he's insistent.
Foggy: He's going to Trish's to pick her up! :)
Foggy: Jessicaaaa!
Foggy: Girl
Foggy: Come on. Are you there? I'm bored all alone…
Jessica: Why did you have to chase your buddy away then?! And he really should be resting….!
Foggy: Because when you see potential of a great love story a real man encourages his bro.
Trish stops the show they were watching. "Jessica? What's going on? I know your mental facepalm face."
She rolls her eyes. "Matt's coming over to pick you up."
"What?! Why?"
"I don't know! Ask Foggy!" Trish takes her phone out, her cheeks becoming red.
Jessica: Just tell me what he's picking her up for.
Foggy: Ah… well…. The Anand Chopra issue bothers him so much, and he wants to confront him.
"Seriously?!" Jessica tells Trish what she just read.
Jessica: WTF Foggy?! He can't be Daredevil a day after we got him out of there. I thought you wanted him safe!
Foggy: I saw an opportunity and told him to ask Hellcat if she wants to join him. To BE safe. Ok, maybe I got carried away. You really think Chopra is dangerous?
Jessica: Not himself, but if he's working with the likes of Fisk...
"Okay, Matt wrote to me as well." Trish is staring at her phone.
Jessica already knows where this is going. "I'll go home. Maybe Malcom would enjoy my company."
"Is that alright?" Trish looks conflicted, but Jess knows she is eager to talk to Matt about things.
"Just take care of your tortured vigilante. Make sure he won't do anything stupid." Jessica takes her.
"He's not really mine. And I think it all got a bit too intense anyway," Trish mumbles.
Jess rolls her eyes and walks to the door. "Yeah, right, keep telling yourself that."
The last couple of days ruined Trish and she only realised how much sleep and food she needed to catch up on after it was over. Looking back on it all now she didn't know how they did it and what she would have done if they had not been able to save him. It scares her. She never felt something like this for someone. Matt putting his own life that low on his priority list makes her want to put him on top of hers. After seeing him break down and actually having him cry in her arms, she wanted to seriously kill every one of those bastards. But that's not supposed to be her. There is darkness in both of them and maybe that means they aren't good for each other. Yet, she really can't see herself letting him go. Ever. Unless he wants her to.
After Trish changed into her armour she opens the door to her balcony and Matt is already waiting there. He's wearing the black outfit he had at the beginning of his crime fighting career, since they didn't find his suit again, just the helmet. Trish never noticed how tight the old one was. It's rather distracting.
"I could use another coffee before we go. Can you come in?"
"Sure. I'm sorry if I ruined your plans."
Trish starts her coffee machine. "I didn't have any plans today." She swallows, because he knows it's a lie, but he ignores it and just nods. Since when are they lying to each other, just to be polite? He takes off the mask, but if they'll be like that, it won't even make a difference.
It's the first time they're alone since they saved him and there are still some things Trish needs to talk about.
"Do you remember me being in your mind….?"
His eyes widen at that, but he manages to nod slowly. There is regret flowing off him. Trish swallows hard, because that means their conversation about Elektra was real and that changes things. She knew this already, but it's still a disappointment to have it confirmed like this.
"But you were never there when..." He stops, unsure if he should say more. Suddenly he looks very pale.
"When they were hurting you? Just that one time when you were shouting at me to go away." She lets that sink in. "And it didn't feel like it was my pain, by the way. But it still hurt that it was yours." The last admition makes her voice shake a little.
He looks a bit relieved now. "How did that work anyway?"
"I've been having those dreams for a while now. It started some time after I got injected. You want one, too?" The first coffee is ready and when he nods she takes another mug. "Sometimes it was Jessica, after they caught you my mind just always went to you, I guess."
Matt furrows his brow. "That's how your fighting skills improved that fast…"
Trish smiles at that observation. "It did? Well, I only started to believe that it was real, when the things you told me turned out to be true."
"Huh… so I guess you did manage to free me and actually opened the handcuffs with your mind - which is amazing by the way." He actually smiles at that. "I thought I must have gone insane or dreamed that." She puts the coffee in front of him and he smoothes his messy hair. It's still pretty much sticking up in all directions.
"But they caught you again."
"They did." He sighs. "Sorry, I was too weak."
Trish closes her eyes and winces at the typical self blame. "Don't, please. Or I'm going to have to blame myself as well for not dreaming my way into your head again. I fucking tried."
"Look, I didn't want to…"
"Did you lie about Elektra?"
"What…?"
"You said that she can't be trusted. But you did trust her."
He closes his eyes. "I'm sorry. I was really just trying to show you that you can trust her if it's about saving me. She really could not be trusted with anything else." It was clearly an uncomfortable topic for him. "And I… I didn't want you to throw your life away for me, too." So, he purposely pushed her away then, to save her. Again. She's not sure if that makes it better though. It still stings.
"I wasn't going to surrender." It's not who she is and she needs him to know that.
"Did you try that number?"
"It was Vanessa."
"I figured, but…. Wow." Matt still seems quite shaken by the whole thing. Even Vanessa's death kind of got to him.
"Yeah… Look, I don't want to pry. I guess you're still mourning Elektra… again. I mean, she meant a lot to you and she was dying, so I get it…" Trish waits for a moment, the memory of them kissing back in her mind. Was that just to make them trust her? No. When he doesn't say anything else, she adds: "I'm not her..."
"And I'm glad. I don't want you to be." Now, that's just great, isn't it?
"Yeah… I'm just not sure that you're ready for anything else... Anything less dramatic, anything without dying for each other." Trish laughs nervously and he looks concerned. She has to be honest with herself and with him. This is all a bit much for her at the moment and what she wants is something more real. She is also not just going to be the filler girl who will soothe his pain. She deserves to be more.
"Oh." Matt swallows. "Okay, I get it."
Does he, though? Because she thinks he felt rejected just now. "We're still friends, right?" She has to be careful of a mental facepalm nowadays, but damn... Trish Walker is not getting friendzoned.
"Is that what you want?" She isn't sure that they could have a future that doesn't involve death and destruction, but she wants to try and figure it out. Was there nothing between Elektra-intense and friendship for him? Or maybe, he thinks, that's just his life and she just said she didn't want that.
"It's more than I could hope for." Damn, those eyes might not be able to see, but they sure can talk.
Why does he have to make this so difficult? He is supposed to be the one trying to convince her. She can fucking feel that he would like to. Trish is also not used to this role. She is used to fight of advances, damn it, not fight for them. "What is it you hope for, then?" Can she make this any more obvious?
But Matt frowns and says: "Nothing." And the asshole looks away. Well, not looks, but his face is turned away so she can't see it. For some reason she doesn't want to push it. She's too annoyed. Her reasons for trying to slow things down with him are pretty solid. Just as solid as those muscles she can clearly see in this outfit. But he's still healing, so she has to keep her hands of anyway. And it's actually not the fact that they both almost died during all this, that is the problem. It's him jumping to close the door on a relationship just because she mentions some doubts about HIM being ready. Would he have done that to Elektra as well?
"Okay, Anand Chopra. I promised Vanessa not to expose him, though." That makes him tilt his head in her direction again. "You know, after what she did, I would like to keep my word."
"But I did not promise anything like that."
Breaking into Anand Chopra's house without getting detected is pretty easy with acute senses and being able to put a key into a lock from behind the door. It just takes some patience and a lot of concentration. Matt and Trish carefully slide into the politicians bedroom and switch on the light. He comes to life immediately and jumps behind the bed on instinct. Looking at the vigilantes like this was his judgement day he just states: "You're here to kill me."
"Wrong guess." Matt pins him against the wall within two seconds and punches him a couple of times until Trish orders him to stop. Her heart is beating fast, so she's afraid he'll go too far again and he still needs answers.
The man starts crying after that and what he says first actually takes them by surprise. "I'm so glad you're alive! I didn't mean for any of this to happen, I swear!"
Matt is taken aback, because it seems to be the truth and Trish asks cautiously: "Why did you do it?"
"I was desperate. A racist moron was about to be elected again and Vanessa offered me a sure win. I wasn't aware I was dealing with Fisk when I agreed. I didn't know what he had planned. Granted, I should never have given someone that much money without looking into it more closely anyway, but I tried to correct it. I tried to talk sense into Christine Shaw before she went on that talk show and gave this woman - Elektra - all the information I could gather. I was sure she'd be able to save you…"
Well, he wasn't able to save her. "She's dead."
The politician winces and starts crying overwhelmed by regret and remorse. "I'm so sorry. I screwed everything up worse by trying to make it better. It's no excuse, I know. I understand that you want to kill me. I always thought we were on the same side. Never imagined it would come to this." Matt wants to smash the man's head in for his idiocy.
But Trish just shakes her head. "Then you should know that Daredevil never kills anyone."
Just in that moment Matt's purpose kind of falters and he sways a little making the crying politician immediately steady him, so he won't fall to the ground, and apologise soon after. They both pretend like this didn't happen.
"Well, I figured he'd make an exception, because I truly deserve it."
The man in question lets go of him and just slumps on a chair in exhaustion. "Why can't this be easy for once?"
Trish stays alert probably thinking this might be a trap, but Chopra's regret seems genuine. He is not lying. "If we need information or assistance from you in the future then be sure to remember this day."
The man nods excitedly at her idea. "What? Well, of course! No question about it. That would be my honor… As well as a noble way to make amends… I thought about stepping down, but then it all would have been pointless." He looks at the dark figure in his chair and Matt now again tries to give the impression of a guy who would punish him if he had to.
Chopra has the decency to act like he's still afraid of his verdict. "I don't know what to say… Is there anything I can do for you now?" He sounds like he's actually begging to help. Did he really look as miserable as he felt, even with the mask covering his tired face? "You've done so much for my city. If you need a break, I have a second house far away, very isolated. I would just give you the key and address. No one will know."
Trish also says that it's a good idea. Are they ganging up on him now to leave his city by itself? Her and the man who almost got him killed or exposed?
"There is something you could do…" Matt tilts his head and Anand Chopra just promises: "Anything."
The man thought he was about to be executed, but still… didn't he learn anything from all this?! "Careful with those unconditional declarations, Mister. I'm gonna have a difficult mission for you. I need a bad sheep. Someone who does the dirty work for me and now you can't even pretend to be above it. I need the Moranos gone. You know, it would be better for our city."
The politician actually looks shocked at this turn of events. "You're not talking about assassinations…"
"I am." Trish shuffles uncomfortably.
"No. In that case…" The man stutters. "I can't help you. Do what you want with me."
"You're saying you won't help me against the criminals who will fill the void left by Fisk? Are you working with them this time?"
Trish now seems to understand what he's getting at. But the man who was practically offering his life for Daredevil just now suddenly looks at him differently. "I'm sorry about what happened to you, but I will not take part in something like this. There are other things we could do about the Moranos. I misjudged you."
Picking up on the disappointment in his voice Matt smiles. "I misjudged you, too. And I'm glad."
The man looks at the Devil of Hell's Kitchen with a new hope again. "Was this a test?"
"Sure it was. Turns out you really can be the man I always hoped you would be." And the other man feels unworthy again and wants to make up for even falling for that bluff. For believing the worst. "Look, if you're not going to use my house, let me at least feed you. We've had a really nice meal today and I think you could use some energy. What do you say?"
"The man has good ideas..." Trish waits for his reaction and if she decides to trust the guy again, that's good enough for him.
He gives her an irritated thumb up, realising he really is hungry, while Chopra observes them. "She's a keeper."
And that hits a nerve, because Matt knows he screwed it up with her, on purpose, no less. She should have someone who looks after her needs as well, not someone who adds his baggage to hers. What she needs is someone who doesn't flirt with danger on a regular basis and invite it into her life as well.
Twenty minutes later they sit at a table and everyone has a plate of Indian curry. It's a very strange little midnight party with two masked house guests and a man in his pyjamas.
"You're sure this isn't poisoned?" Hellcat smirks and Daredevil chuckles. She knows that he would be able to detect any dangerous ingredient in the dish. If only they were this uncomplicated without the silly costumes. Somehow with pretend identities they are able to ignore all the awkwardness, failed expectations and unresolved problems from earlier. Even their unlikely host is clearly pleased with his company, now smiling from ear to ear. There is still blood on his forehead.
After taking the first bite, Matt can't help but ask: "Did you make this yourself? It's delicious."
"As a matter of fact I did. Glad you like it."
"It's so much better than in any restaurant."
Trish is stunned and stopped moving entirely. "From him that is a huge compliment. He's very picky about food."
The cook beams. "Oh, thanks! The trick is to let it cook for some time and let the spices do the rest. You can come by again sometime if you need a midnight snack. You know where the fridge is now. We usually have leftovers, just not this much. The kids have eaten outside."
Matt is honestly starting to forgive the guy, his friendliness is just too endearing and of course he can empathise with the bad conscience he has over everything. It's just weird to be on the receiving end of it. So even if he has no plans of actually taking his food like that he still tells him that he might.
Another shocker for Trish. "When did you become so trusting?"
"I would know if he was lying."
"Well, I'm not and I'm so glad you're considering it."
He looks at Trish then. "I've never heard of you, but I like the costume and it's good to see he has backup now. So, you're his girl?"
"SHE is Hellcat." She grins at Matt's proud tone.
"Hellcat and Daredevil has a nice ring to it."
It really does. "She saved my life."
"Well, someone has to look after you as well I guess." And someone has to look after her as well.
"But if we'll be working together, I need you to explain to me how and why you got involved in all this exactly."
Chopra tells them the whole tale of how he got sucked into Fisk's scheme. It sounds believable and Trish almost chokes on a bite when he mentions that it was her own mother who introduced him to Vanessa. Matt immediately leads the conversation somewhere else, so she can get a grip.