Chapter Text
Mark , Jinyoung thinks, dazed as Mark sits down next to Jinyoung. Mark’s a good friend, Mark would understand, no matter what Jinyoung told him.
“Do you feel better now?” Mark asks, brows knitted together in concern.
Jinyoung nods, fidgeting with the piece of paper, clutched in both of his hands. It feels strange talking about this to Mark, like he’s a love (haha) doctor or something, but there’s no other option available.
“What do you want to talk about, then?” Mark leans back, tense poise slightly more relaxed, yet his eyes are still concerned. That, or he’s just pretending to care to make Jinyoung feel better.
“I think I’m in love with, uh,” Jinyoung says, gripping Jaebum’s note so hard it nearly tears. “Jaebum.”
Jinyoung’s insides heave, and he feels nauseous with anxiety. But Mark’s smiling, lips curved like he’s proud of Jinyoung.
“Congratulations,” Mark grins, flashing his sharp teeth at Jinyoung. “Took you long enough to realise, though- I’m pretty sure Bam and Yugyeom bet how long it would take for you to reciprocate Jaebum’s feelings.”
“What?” Jinyoung frowns, shifting in his sheets. “You do realise that Jaebum doesn’t like me, right?”
“Yeah, right,” Mark snorts, oblivious to Jinyoung’s panic. “Jaebum’s stayed next to you all night, worrying about you. If he doesn’t feel anything for you, I’m Beyonce.” “You’re… not Beyonce, though?” Jinyoung furrows his eyebrows, feeling even more confused.
“That’s the point, Jinyoung.” Mark, to his credit, doesn’t tease him,”He definitely likes you, so go for it!”
“No, you don’t understand,” Jinyoung chokes on his words, voice shaking as he speaks. “I can’t- I can’t do this to him.”
“Do what?” Mark leans forward again, confused but still willing to help, and Jinyoung thinks, damn , he really doesn’t deserve good friends like these. “You’re not going to believe me,” he protests, pulling up his blanket (Jaebum’s blanket) more securely.
“Maybe I will, if you tell me.” Mark’s still patient, and Jinyoung feels so guilty he’s close to vomiting. “No, no, you’ll hate me if you know,” He shakes his head, trembling hands wrapping around himself.
“It’s fine, Jinyoung, just pretend I’m not here, like you’re speaking to air,” Mark’s voice is calm, soothing even, and Jinyoung forces himself to take deep breaths. “Like you’re speaking to Jaebum.”
Jaebum, Jaebum, right.
Jinyoung closes his eyes- he owes Jaebum an explanation. (Jackson too, and Youngjae. And his aunt.)
“I’m cursed,” Jinyoung mumbles into his hands, face buried resolutely into his hands. “Everyone I love dies, like my pet rabbit, and my grandma.”
“I ran away once I thought I was starting to love someone, my aunt, Jackson, my friend Youngjae. But now I can’t run anymore, I can’t afford moving again, but I could never go back to my village after everything that’s happened,” Jinyoung mumbles, wiping at his cheeks, eyes squeezed stubbornly shut. “I don’t know what to do, hyung.”
“Are you sure the curse is real, Jinyoung?” Mark doesn’t laugh, fortunately, but he’s skeptical nonetheless. “It’s just a coincidence, I’m pretty sure love and relationships don’t work like that.”
“It’s too much of a coincidence,” Jinyoung dabs at his eyes, still covering his face- curse his ugly crying face. “There was a witch, she cursed me and when I got home my rabbit and my grandma were both dead.”
“A witch?” Mark sounds like he’s having a hard time believing Jinyoung. “Are you sure it wasn’t a con? There used to be a lot of scammers posing as witches for money…”
“Uh-” It wasn’t as if Jinyoung hadn’t considered the possibility, but he had always been too scared to doubt the words of the witch, her warty face clear as day in Jinyoung’s mind, even after so many years. “I can’t risk hurting Jaebum, or even you guys. What should I do, Mark hyung?”
“Here’s the part where you tell him you want to kiss him forever, and you guys date for real.” Mark replies teasingly, and Jinyoung can just hear the smile in his voice. He’s embarrassed, planting his face in his palms again as he mumbles,”Wow, that’s so helpful.”
“Mark hyung?” Jinyoung pries his hands away from his face when he hears no response, rubbing his eyes blearily. Mark isn’t anywhere in sight, and Jinyoung blinks, confused.
Where did Mark go?
Maybe he went to the toilet or something, Jinyoung guesses. Feeling thirsty, Jinyoung gets up from the bed to look for Mark and perhaps some water, not forgetting to fold the blanket neatly before he leaves.
Jinyoung’s a bit of a slob at home, but he’s not about to make a mess in Jaebum’s house, he thinks as he stacks the blanket on the pillow neatly.
Someone walks into the room, and Jinyoung turns around,”There you ar-” He comes face to face not with Mark Tuan, but with Jaebum.
“Oh,” Jinyoung flinches. “Hi.” “Hey,” Jaebum looks less uncomfortable, but he keeps a wary distance still, giving Jinyoung a once-over,. “Do you feel any better?”
“I’m good,” Jinyoung laughs awkwardly, but Jaebum doesn’t seem thrown off by his short answer. “You were really out of it last night, so I brought you back to my place,” Jaebum replies almost shyly, shifting a little closer to Jinyoung. “I hope you’re okay with that.”
“It’s not like I can not be okay with it,” Jinyoung can’t keep the bite out of his reply. He still feels betrayed (What for? Their relationship was fake all along), and the fact that Jaebum’s still acting nice kind rubs him the wrong way.
“Jinyoung,” Jaebum looks nervous, hands shuffled in his blazer pockets- Jinyoung belatedly remembers that he’s supposed to be at work, or something. “I just want to talk.”
“Aren’t you supposed to be at work?” Jinyoung asks. Jaebum shakes his head twice, like a (cute) puppy, and Jinyoung’s heart thumps loud against his ribs.
Stop it , he tells his dumb heart, but he feels a blush rise on his cheeks simultaneously. Stupid, stupid, stupid , Jinyoung tells himself as Jaebum explains,”I got half-day off, checking on you is more important.”
Jinyoung’s stomach backflips, and it takes all of Jinyoung’s restraint not to do something embarrassing like blush harder, or grin like an idiot. How could Im Jaebum just say something with such weight. like it was nothing, all of a sudden?
“Where’s Mark,” He blurts instead, pretending not to see Jaebum’s bright eyes dull. “He went back to Blur,” Jaebum says, “Bambam’s still hungover, so they’re seriously short on staff.”
“Are you hinting that I should stop hogging your bed and go to work?” Jinyoung can’t resist poking fun at Jaebum, who blanches for a second. “I’m kidding, hyung, I know you wouldn’t do something.”
“Of course you’d know,” Jaebum shrugs, grinning a little at Jinyoung. And just like that, Jinyoung finds his frustration with Jaebum evaporating. “You wanted to talk,” He grumps in an attempt to rescue the last of his dignity, “So talk.”
For a brief moment, Jaebum looks taken aback, but then he nods,”Did you read my, uh, letter?” Jinyoung fumbles around for the piece of paper, now crumpled,”I- yeah.”
“I really like you, Jinyoung,” Jaebum’s nervous, he licks his lips before meeting Jiyoung’s gaze again, and Jinyoung feels incredibly heartsick. “I want to ask you out for real, even though we’re still kind of in our, uh, fake relationship.”
Jaebum grins at Jinyoung, cheeks tinted pink- is he shy?- but Jinyoung just frowns,”About that- Jackson told me you guys used to date, so you don’t have to pretend that you weren’t getting something out of our-”
“I wasn’t using you, Jinyoung,” Jaebum objects, handsome brows arched in confusion. “Yes, I dated Jackson, but there isn’t anything between us anymore. I helped you because I wanted to, is that not enough?”
“Fine,” Jinyoung tells himself he doesn't care whether Jackson and Jaebum are still involved with each other, but he can’t help but feel slightly reassured by Jaebum’s words. “I still don’t think it’s a good idea, Jaebum. There’s too much you don’t know about me.”
“I’m willing to listen,” Jaebum smiles, and Jinyoung wants to give in so bad. “It’s not like that, please don’t make me-” Please don’t make me run away.
“Is it about the curse thing?” Jaebum suggests, voice gentle, and Jinyoung’s eyes nearly pop out of their sockets- Was Jaebum psychic? A descendant of the witch, back to end Jinyoung’s life perhaps?
“Ho- how did you find out about that?” Jinyoung asks, trying very hard not to tremble. Jaebum just shrugs, faintly sheepish,”I was outside when you were talking to Mark.”
“So now you understand I can’t, you know, uh,” Jinyoung flails for a bit, searching for the right word. “Be in a relationship. I’m so sorry, but there’s no way around it, and I just- I don’t want anything bad to happen to you.”
“Are you saying that you care about me, now?” Jaebum seems giddy rather than devastated, a sight that alarms Jinyoung slightly. “That’s -that’s not the point!” Jinyoung replies, flushing as Jaebum smirks. “I can’t feel anything towards you.”
“But do you?” Jaebum asks, eyes earnest, and fuck, Jinyoung just wants to kiss him, tell him that yes, he’d like to date . But he can’t.
“I’m sorry, but the curse- no,” Jinyoung shakes his head. “Tell me more about the curse,” Jaebum offers, scooting closer to where Jinyoung is sitting, and Jinyoung sighs, ”Fine.” He owes him an explanation, at the very least.
Jinyoung tells him everything, how he got cursed and even Jackson and Youngjae. Jaebum raises his eyebrows at the part where he mentions having a not-crush on Jackson, but he doesn’t seem jealous or awkward. “So you’re his asshole high school crush, wow,” He says, and Jinyoung resists the urge to smack his shiny corn teeth, “Sadly so.”
“That’s… a long story,” Jaebum says when Jinyoung’s done, half expecting him to run out of the room screaming or something. “When did this happen again?”
“When I was eight, so that’s-” Jinyoung tells him, and Jaebum nods, thoughtful. “Have you ever heard of the Busan Witch Scam?”
“Witch scam?” Jinyoung’s jaw drops,”No, I haven’t, what’s it about?” “A bunch of old women posed as hags around that time, I was weirdly obsessed with the case as a kid,” Jaebum says, tapping on his phone quickly. “I had always wanted to be a detective, let me look for a picture of the culprits- here,”
Jinyoung takes Jaebum’s phone, and finds himself looking at a very familiar face,”That’s, that’s the witch?” “The fraud, you mean,” Jaebum answers as Jinyoung skims through the article quickly. Scam led by Han Sooyoung, 73, who posed as a witch with some other accomplices, tricking Busan villagers into thinking she was a witch for payment in exchange for good-luck charms and potions.
“She lied to me,” Jinyoung exclaims, and Jaebum smiles,”Curses don’t exist, Jinyoung, I knew that at age 8.” “Shut up,” Jinyoung retorts, but he’s smiling too, grinning at the many articles about fake witch Han Sooyoung.
“It couldn’t be this easy, though,” Jinyoung frowns again. “What about my grandma? My rabbit?” “Did you see any medical reports?” Jaebum suggests, and Jinyoung racks his brain for something, anything.
“My aunt showed me a medical report, I think,” Jinyoung says eventually. “I didn’t read it, because I was 8, but she told me she had a heart disease all along. I thought it was the curse causing her sickness, but-” They stare at each other for a moment, until Jinyoung comes to a realization,”So it was a heart disease and not my curse?”
“Probably,” Jaebum replies, smiling as Jinyoung feels a heavy burden being lifted off his shoulders. He’s still skeptical, though,”My rabbit was perfectly fine, though? I bathed him before I left, and he was healthy-”
“You’re not supposed to bathe rabbits, Jinyoung,” Jaebum tells him, ever patient. “They can die from the shock.” “I killed my rabbit, not the curse,” Jinyoung murmurs quietly, still trying to comprehend these new facts, feeling rather stupid.
He’s not cursed. It feels like he’s been reborn, and he finds himself smiling uncontrollably, feeling free for the first time in years.
“I’m not cursed,” He tells Jaebum, still in a daze. “You’re not cursed,” Jaebum confirms, grin wide and beautiful, and wow, Jinyoung might just be in love.
“What are you waiting for?” Jinyoung asks, and Jaebum gives him a confused glance. His arms are open for Jinyoung though when he reaches over for a tentative hug. “You should take me out on that date,” Jinyoung says, “Jaebum-ssi.”
Jaebum’s answering smile makes Jinyoung’s heart swell, growing bigger, deeper, wider as he looks at him. “Anytime, Jinyoung, if you’d like to.”
And it feels right, when Jinyoung pulls Jaebum in for a kiss- on the lips this time, his eyes holding a silent question. There aren’t any fireworks, or birds chirping fairytale-style, but it’s everything Jinyoung’s ever wanted and more.
-----
Being together as a real couple feels different, but Jinyoung likes the change. They spend more time over at each other’s now, since they’re literally next door neighbours, and Nora seems to like Jinyoung too, sidling up to him whenever he’s at Jaebum’s house.
(“What if I told you I only dated you for your cat?” Jinyoung wonders once as he scratches Nora behind the ears. Jaebum only laughs,”That’s highly probable, but I’ll take what I can.”)
Mark, Bambam and Yugyeom are merciless in their teasing, as expected, but they seem to like Jaebum, giving him free drinks and snacks whenever he visits Jinyoung at Blur, and that’s good enough for now. Jaebum likes his friends too, joking with them like old friends when he’s around, and Jinyoung feels like he’s falling over Jaebum all over again when he sees him and Bambam bent over Jaebum’s laptop, looking at some cat video.
Everything feels natural, and Jinyoung feels at ease, finally free from the clutches of his stupid fake curse. Things fall into place gradually, even though the situation isn’t always ideal.
Jinyoung and Jaebum are cuddling in Jaebum’s apartment, watching a movie when Jackson barges in randomly,”Hey, Jaebum- are you free right now?”
They spring apart on the couch, eyeing each other frantically as Jackson gives them both a weird look. “I knew I shouldn’t’ve given him the spare key,” Jaebum mutters as Jackson averts his eyes. The look he spares Jinyoung is hostile, and he remembers- he owes Jackson the truth too.
“I’ll go now, sorry,” Jackson twists his gaze away from Jinyoung in some sort of stubborn determination, and Jinyoung stands up,”No, it’s fine. Can I talk to you about something?”
“I’ll get some coffee,”Jaebum walks away to give them space as Jackson sits back down, eyeing Jinyoung with distrust,”What is it, Jinyoung?”
“Please don’t tell me you’re going to leave Jaebum, he doesn’t deserve this-” Jackson looks worried, and it hurts, it hurts for Jinyoung to see his best friend thinking so lowly of him. “No, Jackson.”
“I want to talk about us, back in middle school,” Jinyoung starts. He’s scared, it’s awkward, but he knows he needs to do this. “I didn’t run away because I hated you, I ran away because I liked you too much, and I was worried for your life because I thought I had a curse which killed everyone I loved.” Jackson stares at him in disbelief, but Jinyoung forces himself to keep talking.
“I shouldn’t have done that, and I’m so sorry, I’ve been regretting my decision for years now, and you deserve so much, Jackson-” Jackson tackles Jinyoung in a fierce hug as he blinks back hot tears. “I’m so sorry,” Jinyoung murmurs into Jackson’s shoulder, and he pats Jinyoung on the back reassuringly,” I believe you, Jinyoung, and I forgive you, too.”
“But I haven’t even told you about the curse, I could be lying-” Jinyoung pulls back to tell Jackson, but he only grins,”We’re best friends, right? And you can tell me about it now, we’ve got all the time in the world.”
-----
Jinyoung buys a journal on his first real date with Jaebum, once everything is settled. The cover is fancy, with gold loopy writing, and it reminds him of a fairytale storybook, those expensive ones at bookstores which Jinyoung was always scared of accidentally tearing.
He writes a lot of things in his journal. Diary logs, mostly, and pictures too, if he manages to find any. He notes down the day he calls Youngjae, to tell him that he’s fine and he didn’t disappear because he was mad at him or anything. Youngjae cries, telling Jinyoung how much he’s missed him.
He blinks away tears at that, promising Youngjae that he’ll visit Mokpo as soon as he can, and Youngjae promises to wait for him.
“I love you, Jae-ah,” Jinyoung says when it’s time to say goodbye, and there’s a pause from Youngjae’s end. “I love you too, hyung,” Youngjae’s laughing, and Jinyoung feels his heart expand with love for his friend. “See you soon.”
“How did things with your Youngjae go?” Jaebum asks him as they have dinner together later that night, trying out a new recipe at Jinyoung’s. “Everything’s perfect,” Jinyoung grins, reaching over to squeeze Jaebum’s hand, freezing once he realises that his hands are sticky with sauce.
(Jaebum doesn’t seem to mind, interlocking their dirty fingers as they wash up together, laughing over nothing.)
Jinyoung writes about the time he visits his aunt, Jaebum keeping him company from the boring plane flight to the nerve-wracking trek to his aunt’s cottage. Nothing much about the house has changed, really, and Jinyoung feels like a toddler again, hesitating in front of the weathered wooden door.
“Go ahead,” Jaebum grips his hands tightly before letting go. “I’m here, there’s nothing to be afraid of.” And Jinyoung thinks yeah, Jaebum’s here, there’s nothing to be feared .
His aunt comes to the door promptly, her familiar eye wrinkles sending a jolt down Jinyoung’s spine. This is real, he reminds himself. I’m with my family again .
Aunt Heejung brushes away stray grey hairs, peering at Jinyoung above gold-framed glasses,”Who’s this?” “Auntie, it’s me,” Jinyoung says, and Aunt Heejung’s expression turns to one of sadness, then to one of shock,”Is it- Are you Hyojung’s Jinyoung?”
“Yes, Auntie,” Jinyoung says, tears spilling uncontrollably as his aunt wraps him in a firm hug. “It’s you, it really is you, Jinyoung-ah,” She says repeatedly, holding Jinyoung tight in her embrace.
“It’s me, Auntie,” Jinyoung pats his aunt on the back gently, “I’m back.” Aunt Heejung pulls away to look at Jinyoung properly, eyes shiny,”My word, you’ve grown up so well! Come on in-”
She turns to Jaebum, hovering next to Jinyoung,”And who’s this?”
“I’m-” Jaebum hesitates, and Jinyoung knows that he doesn’t want to make things awkward, just in case Aunt Heejung disapproved of their relationship. “I’m a friend.”
“A friend of Jinyoungie’s?” Aunt Heejung asks, beaming. “Well, help yourself-”
“Auntie, auntie,” Jinyoung motions for his aunt to hold on. “This is my boyfriend, Jaebum.”
Aunt Heejung’s expression goes blank for a second, before ushering both of them into the house,”Come, both of you- before it gets cold outside!”
They stay near Aunt Heejung’s house for a few days, Jinyoung telling his family about how he’s been and Aunt Heejung showing them pictures of Jinyoung’s family. Aunt Heejung’s daughters and their respective families come by too, and Jinyoung fits in perfectly, entertaining his little nieces and nephews that he didn’t even know existed.
Aunt Heejung is nice but cautious towards Jaebum, like she doesn’t really how to interact with him. Jaebum insists it’s fine, but Jinyoung sees his drooping shoulders and awkward smiles. But when they bid Aunt Heejung and her family goodbye, Aunt Heejung tackles Jaebum in a fierce hug, and Jinyoung hears her whispering to him,”Thank you, thank you so much for our Jinyoung.”
It’s a good day, even though Jinyoung cries when they board the plane, heading home.
Jinyoung writes down more and more memories in his journal, and there’s so much to be written that he soon reaches the end of the journal. There’s no conclusion to Jinyoung’s story yet, and it’s not exactly happily ever after, but with Jaebum and his friends by his side, Jinyoung thinks he’s the luckiest person in the world.