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She looked at the tiny book in her hands. The King had told her it was Noctis' and he had meant to take it with him, yet somehow overlooked it.
"I had found it in his study after he left," he told her, "and when I opened the cover, I saw it had never been intended for anyone but him and perhaps one day you as well, so I closed it, meaning to see it returned and now," he smiled warmly and placed it within her hands, "I can instead give it to you," she watched as he left. Before he shut her door, he turned once more and smiled and bid her a good night.
Sitting on her bed, she opened the small book and began to read it. On the first page, he had written his name and that it was a private journal, and she paused on that. Should she actually read it? Was it intruding on what was meant to be private? Finally, she found curiosity won out, and she also wanted a connection to him based on more than simple memories of their childhood.
When I first met her, I couldn't pronounce her name, so I called her Luna, but now, as a man, I call her Luna because it means "moon," and her pale beauty surely rivals that of any heavenly body set within the sky.
Lunafreya blushed at his words and, closing her eyes, could imagine the handsome Prince saying such words to her. She wondered if he did, would he perhaps cup her cheek with one hand and smile, or would he dare to share one simple kiss?
I dream and dream of the day we were children and fleeing the chaos that had already killed her Mother. I see that moment she stopped, letting go of Father's hand, and in my dreams, they kill her as we run away. The pain I feel is worse now that I am older, for now, it is not a friend I lose, but instead a woman I will marry one day and soon love more than any other. My nightmares are simply that, a fear that will never come to pass. We will marry, and when we do, the dreams will stop, and we will live happily.
She felt her breath catch at his words. She too dreamed of that day, the day as a child she sacrificed herself to allow her friend and the King she loved so very much to escape and be free. As a child, she had adored Noctis; unlike her own Brother, Noctis had been kind and like her, rather shy and quiet. He was her first love and now her only, but unlike some who may find anger in an arranged marriage, she did not. The boy who had charmed her heart was now the man she would marry, and she was pleased with that. She had told the King that she would do her duty, that she would not run and stay to honor this pledge, but it was so much more than that within her heart.
Her life had been sad and painful, first losing her Mother and then losing the man her Brother had been before that fateful day. Ravus had changed, blaming the King for not saving them, for not avenging their Mother, but that was not the truth, just the truth as he saw it. Something that she had known even as a child was that the King and his only heir had to survive, for only the line of Lucis could stop the evil and madness that threaten this world. Ravus may think his importance was far greater than he actually was, but his ego refused to allow otherwise, and when she had tried to leave, he had detained her and used her for his own plans that she worried might be.
That thought brought her back to Noctis. Kind shy Noctis, who was to be her husband. She smiled again at the thought and returned to the small book within her hands, where he had written his thoughts. Part of her felt like she still was intruding on things he may have never wished for her to see or know, but now with all this going on, with nations vying for control, she needed to reconnect with her childhood crush and friend, and this was the best way she could.
She read several more sweet confessions, most stating the same thing over and over, then pages that only had the words I dream and nothing else. She wondered what those dreams had been? Nightmares like he had written before or something far worse, so dark he could only acknowledge with the simple words of I dream?
I dreamed Luna, and I were far away from this war, that we lived somewhere simple, she as my wife and I, I am her devoted husband. We live somewhere small, with no fancy palaces, no fine clothes, just a simple couple who do not need to worry about royalty, war, or Empires that rise and fall. In my dream, she sits in a garden of flowers with the sun shining down on her. As I get closer, she held pale white roses in her hands, newly cut, and I found myself frozen as she looked up at me and smile. Her hair shined like spun gold in the light, and her eyes like the sky, bright and full of warmth.
There are times when I know my Father does not think I take my duty as his heir very seriously, and I know I do nothing to change that either, but I do understand the burden of birth, and I am sure Luna understands it as well. I will not shrink from my duty, but I also will not allow it to draw me down and into the abyss of despair either that this war wished to leash me with. I am my Father's heir, and I will do my duty to those who need me, but the dreams of simple life are my haven from princely duty.
I have been told it is frivolous to wish for such innocent and sweet love with my chosen bride, but is it so terrible to not hope this is to be a love match as well as a political one? Why can it not be so? Since my earliest memories, we have been friends, and does not friendship itself express a type of love? Could not friends grow into real, honest love?
So many questions, so much weight heaped onto my shoulders, but until the day we wed comes to pass. Until I carry my Father's crown with pride, I have my dreams of a simple life with a woman who is far more worthy of a man like me, and that will have to be enough for now. When the future comes, I will face it then, but until that point, I will dream of her, surrounded by roses, laughing in the sun, and watching her face light up with love as I approach her, and that is enough.
She then saw that several pages had been torn out. What had they said that he had torn them from this book? Finally, though, the torn pages had stopped, and she found a newer entry.
Last night my Father told me I would be leaving, and I was surprised when I learned who was to go with me, not that I am unhappy as they are all men I trust, but it was odd that it did not include a member or more of the kingsglaive. Yet, I imagine he needs every one of them here to fight. There is one I have met that I do find I like, and that is Nyx Ulric. He is not like a few of the others I have spoken too and his loyalty to my Father, and our home is without question. I suppose if I am to leave, I will find comfort in knowing he is here for my Father, as I do not doubt he would defend all I love to his very last breath.
She paused; that was the man who brought her here, and as she was escorted to her chambers, was told he would be her personal guard as well. He had intelligent eyes that held strength without a doubt, but knowing he was loyal to the King and this city was comforting. If the King and, even Noctis, trusted the man, then she would do so as well and heed his advice should any situation arise that she needed to. Perhaps that is why the King assigned him to be her escort and guard in the first place?
I wonder to the future as I write now, I know Niflheim will not rest until all are crushed beneath its might, and if that is true, what happens to my Father, to me, and most of all to my dear Luna? Will we find a way to survive this? Will the future see Luna and I united, ruling after my Father, and enjoy the love that has grown from our childhood? I pray it is so and when the day comes that I take my Father's place, my dear bride at my side, that when we seal this union with a simple kiss, we will unite and be strong so that we may withstand the storm of war and allow our own children to have the childhood Luna and I were denied.
I have heard many times in my life that the line of Lucis is strong and it can fight back the strongest of evils, and if it is true, I pray I will do it justice.
Lunafreya closed the book and felt a tear slide down her cheek. This was not the Noctis those around them had seen. That Noctis was fun-loving and to some maybe even a bit immature too, but this was the real Noctis, the one who worried deep inside, the one who was conflicted, one who worried about the future, and rightfully so. Yet as she laid down on her bed and brought the small book up to her chest, she prayed with her heart that somehow they would find a way to survive this world, for now, she knew without a doubt, she loved him and him alone and was happy to wed her young Prince finally.