Chapter Text
Miranda watched as her twins skated around the Rockefeller centre. Clasping her hands together for warmth, she almost regretted the decision that she was getting too old to go skating. She smiled gently as Cassidy twirled Caroline into a spin. They’d handled the last year so well and she’d even managed to put some work into spending time with them. Most nights she would be home for dinner, and she’d even had enough time to help with homework. It had constantly surprised her how much this had meant to the girls.
No matter how much time she'd eked out for them, how happy her children were, Miranda didn’t feel all that happy. Content, certainly, but not happy. Not since Paris. Not since Andréa.
She sat there pondering the thoughts that she usually pondered once her children were in bed, and the house was silent. Why did she miss her former second assistant so much? Why did she feel that she couldn’t let go? She still had no idea why Andréa had left. She knew it wasn’t because of Nigel, it seemed more than that. And she still had no idea why she couldn’t seem to make herself blacklist the obnoxious girl. Everyone at Runway knew to never say her name in the office, but it didn’t push her any further from Miranda’s mind. She pulled her focus back to the ice rink in front of her, noticing that her twins were leaning on the barricades on the other side of the rink talking to someone. Frowning, and suddenly feeling all her protective instincts kick into high gear, she swept up their belongings and made her way around the rink.
They should know better than to talk to strangers.
As Miranda drew closer she realised that the twins were looking at something in a woman’s arms. She picked up her pace. She had not earned the nicknames she had by being nice and as such, developed a lot of enemies. What better way was there to hurt her than to use the most important people in her life. Her heartbeat sped up as she got closer, seeing Caroline leaning over the railing touching whatever it was in the woman’s hand.
"Caroline!"
The yelling was so uncharacteristic that Cassidy spun around in fright, slipping on the ice and pulling her twin down with her. The woman they had been talking to spun around as well and the two stood there for a full minute staring in astonishment.
Miranda tried her hardest to say something, anything as she stood there looking into those big brown eyes, but nothing seemed to come. The woman cleared her throat.
"Um, hi Miranda," Andréa said softly, her gaze fell to the bundle in her arms that Miranda still couldn’t see properly.
Miranda stood completely still as her feelings flew out of control. She still couldn’t make her mouth move and she realised she must have looked like an idiot. Pulling every ounce of self-control she could muster she drew herself up to her full height.
"Yes, well. Hello Andréa," she said. Her tone matching the frigid weather. Andy looked at Miranda for a second before smiling apologetically at the girls.
"Sorry munchkins," she said gently giving them a wink before turning to leave.
"Andy wait," Caroline said before she could get too far. "Aren’t you going to show Mom?" she said with a frown. Andy turned to look at Miranda, who was still staring at her.
"I don’t think so sweetie."
Miranda watched the girl shrug a little, looking at whatever was in her arms before turning to leave once more.
"Mom! What is wrong with you?" Cassidy said waving her arms, almost knocking Caroline over again. That brought Miranda out of her trance.
"I beg your pardon?" Miranda said, wondering what on earth just happened.
"Why didn’t you say something? We both know you haven’t been happy since Andy left," Caroline said, picking up the conversation. "And you should have gone to her."
Feigning disinterest she waved her hand making her girls roll their eyes, remarkably like their mother.
"What was in her arms?" Miranda said, trying to be nonchalant about the whole thing. It was so difficult to see in this half-light and with all the winter gear one had to wear in New York, Miranda still couldn’t figure it out.
"Urgh," Cassidy said throwing her arms up in resignation. "I give up. What are you going to do when we leave? You can't be our Mom forever you know."
Miranda watched, slightly shocked, as her youngest by 5 minutes skated off around the ice. Caroline flashed an apologetic look before patting her hand.
"You should call her Mom," Caroline said gently. "Invite her for dinner, we don’t mind, in fact, we’d love it," she said with a small smile, before leaving her mother standing in awe of how much more mature her twins had gotten almost overnight.
She sat on the closest bench and pondered for a moment, realising suddenly the same thing that the twins apparently had.
Miranda Priestly was in love with Andréa Sachs.
-0-
Andy sighed as she walked back to her apartment, shrugging off her winter gear and dumping it on the side table. She should have known that wherever the twins were, Miranda would have been close by, but she just couldn’t help it. After the 'Harry Potter incident,' the twins had warmed up to her considerably and often took the time to sneak downstairs whenever Andy delivered the book. She sighed as she looked down at the bundle in her arms. Three months old already. He was the most beautiful thing she’d ever seen, and she smiled when the twins had told her much the same. Things had been so difficult in the last twelve months since she’d left Miranda in Paris and she had only just begun to get over the fact that she had feelings for the unfathomable editor.
Now they were back in the forefront of her mind.
"Come along my love," she said gently, picking up her baby boy and settling on the couch. He grumbled as she took off a few of his many layers, laughing as he flailed around until he found what he wanted. As Andy sat feeding him, she gently stroked the soft hairs on his head, once again amazed at how much she could love someone so tiny. She frowned when the phone rang, disturbing him from his dozing.
"Hello?"
"Andréa?" Andy’s mouth fell open as she realised who was on the phone.
"Miranda?"
"I," Andy waited for Miranda to say something, wondering absently why she was even ringing. "You are required at the Townhouse tomorrow. 7 pm sharp," Andy snapped out of her daze, feeling a little anger swell in her chest.
"In case you’ve forgotten, I don’t work for you anymore," she snapped, disturbing the baby. She heard Miranda sigh and rolled her eyes. Andy contemplated asking her what she wanted, but couldn't seem to get the words out - she was Miranda Priestly for god’s sake and nobody asked Miranda Priestly anything.
"I see your attitude hasn’t changed," Miranda said icily.
Andy soothed her child, who was grumbling at the interruption of his dinner and shook her head. She knew Miranda in and out and she knew there would be no winning against this mood.
She conceded. Partially.
"You know what?" Andy said softly. "I can’t do this. If you ever work out what it is you actually want to say to me, give me a call. I've never not taken your call."
Andy hung up the phone and glanced around her empty apartment, thankful for the fact that she still had the inheritance her grandfather had left her years ago. She dreaded to think how much worse her life would be if she had moved back to Ohio. Miranda still scared her, but having to move back home would have been so much worse.
-0-
Miranda stood in her study looking at the phone in shock. No-one hung up on Miranda Priestly, and yet the impertinent girl had done just that. Still in shock, she didn’t hear the study door open and her twins walk in, looking a little confused as to why she was standing staring at the receiver.
"Mom?" Caroline said cautiously.
Miranda snapped out of her daze to look at her Bobbseys, smiling falsely when she dropped the phone as if it burned her.
"Hello darlings, ready for bed?"
"Mom, who was on the phone?" Cassidy asked. If she didn't still feel completely off kilter, Miranda would have smiled. As it was, her stomach kept doing somersaults at the audacity of what Andréa had just done.
"Nobody sweetheart, absolutely nobody," she lied, knowing her children would be less than impressed with how she had acted.
"Mom, are you going to ring Andy?" Caroline asked hopefully.
Miranda took a deep breath and recognised the looks in her babies eyes. They wouldn’t give up on the idea that she had supposedly been unhappy since Andréa had vacated her life, and as much as it galled her to admit it, they weren’t necessarily wrong.
"Come and sit with me," she said, getting up from her desk and sitting in the middle of the sofa in her study. She recalled so many nights like this one where they’d simply sat and read together, Cassidy sitting properly, but leaning slightly against her, as if she was afraid to be the child Miranda knew they should still be. Caroline had no qualms about draping herself all over Miranda though and Miranda secretly enjoyed it. It reminded her of happier times when they were young enough to want to cuddle in bed on a weekend before her life got too busy for them, and they had to grow up too soon.
"Andréa and I have a complicated history, and I don’t think she wants to hear from me," she explained gently, trying to swing just a tiny bit of the blame on Andréa. The impertinent girl had left her after all. It was only fair that she took even a fraction of the blame.
She felt the disturbance coming before she heard it when Cassidy went still in her arms.
"Bullshit," she said, getting up and standing before Miranda with her fists clenched and wearing a scowl worthy of her mother. If it weren't directed at her, she'd be proud.
"Cassidy, we do not use language like that, you know this. Your iPod will be removed from your possession for two days," Miranda said, still reeling.
She wasn't sure what troubled her more - the fact that her child could see right through her, or that her baby was old enough suddenly to understand the finer points of cursing.
"Oh come on Mom. We're not stupid, we know Andy, and we know you. Between the two of you I know which one of you would have stuffed this whole thing up," she ranted, kicking the sofa.
"Cass -" Caroline started.
"No, I’m sick of it. Why do you have to be so mean all the time, why can’t you just be nice? Andy was nice! Why do you have to make the one thing we both loved run away. I HATE YOU and I hope Andy and Thomas do too."
Miranda’s eyes widened comically as Cassidy clamped a hand over her mouth.
"Oh no!" she squeaked. "Now she’s going to hate me too."
Miranda couldn’t breathe, couldn’t talk as Cassidy turned her glare back at her before running out of the room. Her somewhat relaxing evening was punctuated by the slamming of Cassidy’s bedroom door as she sat reeling.
"Mommy?" Caroline hated fighting and the wobble in her voice was heartbreaking.
"It’s alright Bobbsey," she said gently, pulling her youngest closer to her, "she is entitled to feel that way, I still love her."
"She still loves you too," Caroline whispered. "She didn’t really mean that."
Miranda smiled and kissed her baby’s hair, taking a moment to soak up the love before leaning back and cupping Caroline’s chin.
"I know sweetheart, but you and I both know that I have not always been here for you. I’ve tried to do better but -"
"But nothing Mom," Caroline said, suddenly kneeling up beside her. "I heard you on the phone, you could have talked to Andy better, sure, but like you always say, it’s done now. What you have to do now is figure out how you're going to make up for it. Cassidy will be alright, she’s always alright but Andy doesn’t know you like we do. She doesn't know you're really a nice person! But," Caroline smiled at her mom. "I think she would want to."
Miranda had never felt so useless as a mother. Even when she had watched her ex-husband making them laugh instead of cry, changing their diapers while she was on her way out to work. Caroline was teaching her how to be a human being, and it was humbling.
"Just ring her, tell her you’re sorry for doing whatever it was that you did to drive her away and get her to come over for dinner."
"Oh yes, should I invite this Thomas as well?" Miranda said tersely, feeling more cantankerous when Caroline giggled and leaned into her to kiss her cheek.
"He can’t not come Mom, but that can be your surprise to enjoy. He’s cute, you’ll like him," she added almost as an afterthought.
As she traipsed off to bed, leaving Miranda stewing on the sofa, Miranda was sure of one thing absolutely. She would not like any man in Andréa’s life. Ever.