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Lapis Lazuli had never had what she would describe as an “easy ride” – and the past few months had been no exception.
With the impending Second Gem War looming over her, she’d made the incredibly difficult decision to leave the earth for some time... before realising the error of her ways and returning home. A little while after she was reunited with her beloved barn mate, Peridot had gotten herself into some real trouble; the small green Gem had been poofed, and something about her new look after finally reforming didn’t sit right with Lapis.
“I mean, I know she’s been a Crystal Gem for a long time, but looking at her wearing a star...”
Lapis sighed heavily, well aware of Steven’s concerned gaze falling over her. She’d decided she needed a short break from the barn in light of these recent events, and was spending the day at the Crystal Temple with Steven instead.
“It’s okay, Lapis...” Steven tried to reassure his friend, but Lapis didn’t seem convinced.
“No, it’s not okay!” she fumed, “I still don’t... I mean... I don’t know if I’ll ever be ready to become a Crystal Gem. Not after everything that’s happened.”
Steven averted his eyes to the floor, unsure of what to say in response. He wanted Lapis to do what was right for her, but at the same time, he couldn’t help but think how much becoming a Crystal Gem might actually be good for Lapis – even if she didn’t see it like that yet.
“Rose Quartz has got a lot to answer for!” Lapis scoffed, her trademark cynical humour raising its head once again.
Rose Quartz...? Steven thought to himself, Could that be the answer?!
The young boy bounced off the sofa and smiled warmly at Lapis.
“Lapis, I need to show you something,” he announced as he held his hand out to the Ocean Gem.
---
“Steven, what’s the meaning of this?” a confused Lapis asked as the pair of them stood in front of the large door inside the Temple.
“You’ll see,” Steven replied as he lifted his shirt away from his stomach, his Gem now glowing brightly as the Temple door began to open. Lapis looked on as Steven bounded inside the newly-revealed room, turning back to her with a grin.
“C’mon, Lapis!” he called.
After a moment’s hesitation, the blue Gem stepped through the doorway.
---
Inside lay a room unlike any that Lapis had ever seen before. Swirls of fluffy pink clouds floated wistfully at her feet as she cautiously walked along behind her friend. The entire room had an otherworldly feel to it, yet at the same time the Ocean Gem felt bizarrely at ease as the warm hue of the room enveloped her.
“Steven,” breathed Lapis, “What is this place?”
“It’s my room!” he replied cheerfully, “I mean, it was my Mom’s room first, but I guess I inherited it.”
The young boy stopped walking and turned to face the blue Gem.
“Lapis... this room”, he said as he gestured around the pair of them, “Well... it lets you see what you want to see, or what you need to see. So, there’s someone I’d like you to meet.”
Steven stepped aside and let the room work its magic before the Ocean Gem’s very eyes.
Lapis gasped at the form that had appeared in front of her. A very tall Gem wearing a long white dress and an affectionate smile was looking down at her. She had a mesmerising mass of curly pink hair that flowed beautifully over her shoulders, and an unmistakable star-shaped opening in her dress which revealed a stunning pink Gem on her stomach. It couldn’t be anyone else...
“Rose Quartz?!”
“Lapis Lazuli...” Rose replied, still smiling down at the bewildered blue Gem. The quartz elegantly sat down on the floor, beckoning Lapis over to her.
“Please, Lapis, come and join me. We have a lot to discuss.”
“No! No... I can’t!” the blue Gem yelled, summoning her wings almost instinctively.
“Lapis, wait, it’s okay!” Steven shouted as he ran towards her, “Please... just wait.”
Lapis looked at her friend with a furrowed brow, unsure of how to take this. The boy smiled back at her, looking so much like his mother...
“C’mon, let’s both take a seat, ok?” he calmly reassured the Ocean Gem as he took her hand.
Lapis nodded, placing her trust in Steven – and nervously sat down among the bizarre pink clouds with the two quartzes.
“So, Lapis Lazuli...” Rose began, “Something’s troubling you, isn’t it?”
Lapis wanted to be angry. She wanted to scream and rage at the Gem in front of her. And yet, something about Rose Quartz almost made her feel strangely calm and unguarded.
“Yes, it is...” Lapis replied, “I don’t know whether I can fight for the earth. I don’t know if I can be a Crystal Gem! I don’t know what my place is in all of this...”
Rose smiled at her kindly.
“It’s ok, Lapis. I understand. Decisions like this aren’t easy to make,” she told the Ocean Gem, “But still... surely you’ve seen the appeal of the earth?”
Rose reached down to the ground and Lapis gasped – she hadn’t noticed the flowers that had appeared there. The pink quartz took a handful and started fashioning them into some sort of crown as she continued talking to a very bemused Lapis.
“Earth is full of life, Lapis,” Rose told her, “And full of such beautiful things”.
With a grin, Rose reached over and placed the crown atop Lapis’ head. The blue Gem couldn’t help but smile back at her. Steven was also beaming and had begun hastily making himself a flower crown, too.
“I know, but...” Lapis began as she collected her thoughts, “Sometimes, I feel like I’m trapped here.”
Rose looked puzzled. “How so?” she enquired.
“Every time I try to leave this planet, I get dragged back! It’s like...” she sighed, “Like I can never truly be free.”
Rose opened her mouth to reply, but Lapis cut her off before she could begin.
“I was a prisoner. So many times, I’ve been a prisoner... I wasn’t even supposed to be on this planet for very long... but no, I had to get caught up in your stupid war!”
Steven looked on nervously as Lapis got to her feet...
“And then what? I was trapped inside that mirror! Your friends knew I was in there, Rose Quartz, and they did nothing! Nothing at all! Have you got any idea what that felt like?!” Lapis raged at the pink Gem, getting ever more angry by the second as her initial calmness began making way for pure fury, “I was trapped for thousands of years, inside my own Gem, stuck in the back of that awful contraption! Being used like some sort of tool, even after my Gem broke! And not one of you wonderful Crystal Gems even remotely cared about me!!”
Steven’s eyes were beginning to fill with tears as he looked up at Lapis. His mother, on the other hand, remained perfectly calm; and this didn’t go unnoticed by Lapis...
“Look at you, you don’t even care now!” the Ocean Gem screamed, “But why would you care! Perfect old Rose Quartz, put up on your precious little pedestal by the Crystal Gems! What does it matter if you destroyed the life of a Lapis Lazuli?! And what would you even know about... being trapped... in...”
Lapis slowly began to trail off as the realisation hit her like a ton of bricks. She glanced at the bright pink Gem on Rose’s stomach – and then at the very same Gem on Steven’s belly. Steven looked so much like his mother... because Steven Quartz Universe and Rose Quartz were one and the same. Rose had ceased to exist so that Steven could be born, after all.
She’s basically trapped now, too... she can’t exist because Steven has her Gem... and this is wrong, it’s like yelling at Steven... Lapis’ mind was a whirlwind of thoughts – and none of them were good.
The blue Gem slowly sunk to her knees and buried her face in her hands, feeling so guilty for her outburst. She jumped slightly as she felt herself being enveloped in a warm hug; not from Steven, but from Rose.
“Lapis... I’m so sorry for what happened to you,” Rose murmured in her ear, “I’m truly sorry. You didn’t deserve that. You didn’t deserve any of it...”
Lapis clung on tight to Rose Quartz for a few moments as Steven looked on helplessly, tears streaming down his face. At the same time, Rose felt the small blue Gem begin sobbing shakily in her embrace and held her closer.
“It’s okay, Lapis...” she said soothingly, sounding so much like her son.
After what felt like an eternity, Lapis gently pulled away from Rose’s hug. The quartz looked down at her with another warm smile, which once again served to calm Lapis somewhat. Rose reached over to the smaller Gem and gently adjusted the crown on her head, making Lapis smile weakly through her tears.
“Lapis, I understand why you’re angry and upset,” Rose said, “Anyone would be. But please, just answer one question for me – why did you willingly return to earth after you left this time?”
Lapis looked puzzled for a moment...
“Well... because...” she began, before letting out a small chuckle, “because I guess this is the closest thing that I have to a home now, despite everything. And I...uh... suppose I kinda came back for someone...”
“Ah yes, a certain Peridot,” Rose answered with a grin as Lapis began to blush.
How does she even know that?! Lapis thought to herself for a moment, slightly caught off-guard by Rose’s remark.
“Peridot told me that the earth is worth fighting for...” Lapis continued, “But I’m not sure if I’m ready for that.”
“Lapis, that’s completely fine!” Rose told her, “I’m sure Peridot will understand that. This is something that you need to figure out for yourself, and do what’s right for you. These things take time, it would be foolish to rush into anything. But...” Rose paused for a second, a rather wry smile forming across her face, “Would you fight for her?”
“Uh...” Lapis replied, “I guess so...”
“Then perhaps that is your place in all of this,” Rose said with a grin, “To fight for the one you love!”
“L-love?!” Lapis spluttered, “What?!” – as both Rose and Steven laughed to themselves knowingly.
---
After some casual conversation – and plenty of flower crowns – Lapis knew that she needed to leave. She didn’t want Peridot to worry about her if she was gone from the barn for too long. Not after everything that had happened recently.
“Thanks, Rose Quartz,” Lapis said as she stood up to leave, “Thank you, for everything.”
“You’re very welcome, Lapis!” Rose replied with a grin.
The Ocean Gem looked to Steven, who nodded at her. Then, together, they left the room as Rose Quartz’s form melted away into the swirling pink clouds that surrounded her.
---
“Oh my stars, Lapis, where have you been?!” Peridot cried when her barn mate returned home, greeting Lapis at the door before she even had a chance to step inside, “And... what’s that strange hat that you’re wearing?”
Peridot was pointing to the flower crown on Lapis’ head; she’d forgotten that she was still wearing it.
“It’s okay, Peridot!” Lapis replied, “I was just spending some time with Steven. He made this...”
The Ocean Gem reached up and took the crown from her head.
“It’s called a flower crown,” she said as she placed it on top of Peridot’s triangular hair with a cheeky grin, “Here, you can have it – pink looks better on you than me!”
“Wow, thanks!” Peridot beamed, “I actually have something for you, too... Just wait a moment...”
A bemused Lapis looked on as the green Gem raced inside the barn – and quickly came back out again, clutching something small in her hands.
“I... uh...” Peridot was getting slightly flustered now, “I made this for you, Lapis! I know how you feel about the Crystal Gems – and that’s okay! But if you ever change your mind, then...”
She held out her hands to Lapis and opened them – revealing a bright blue hair clip adorned with a star.
“...then this is probably a better way of getting your own star than the method I chose!”
Lapis felt quite moved by this gesture. Slowly, she reached out to Peridot and took the clip from her.
“Thanks, Peridot...” she murmured, trying to hide the deep blue blush that was now forming across her cheeks. The oblivious technician just grinned back at her with a look of pure adoration in her eyes.
The moment was abruptly interrupted by wild barking coming from inside the barn.
“Pumpkin, what’s going on in there?!” Peridot called as she raced into her home again.
Lapis chuckled to herself, still holding tightly onto the hair clip. She turned to look at the sky, which was now filling with stars – and couldn’t help but sigh happily. She might not have everything figured out yet, but one thing was for sure. Earth was her home; and it was where she belonged, in spite of everything.
“Thanks, Rose Quartz...” she whispered quietly as she gazed up at the heavens, before quietly slipping the star-decorated clip into her hair.