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i want your midnights

Summary:

“I’ve been talking to Mom and Dad a lot about you and Jung Jung,” his brother says. “I think you should bring him along if you’re planning on visiting home soon.”

Eunki and Jung Jung visit Eunki's home, and a lot happens in between.

Notes:

Hello! I'm not exactly sure how to categorize this, because this is sort of a New Year's fic, but it's also kind of late for that, so it's just a winter holiday fic that got really really long. But I wanted to write something a little softer and come back to Eunki and Jung Jung (kinda nervous i lost my grip on their voices from come on skinny love because it has been a while)

There is sexual content referenced throughout, but it isn't anything too explicit.

In any case, I hope you enjoy!!

Title comes from Taylor Swift's "New Year's Day"

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

Junki brings it up when they’re having lunch one day.

“I’ve been talking to Mom and Dad a lot about you and Jung Jung,” he says. “I think you should bring him along if you’re planning on visiting home soon.”

Eunki freezes. Granted, a lot has changed in their family. His brother is an ally when talking to their parents, and he fills up his end of the conversation praising what Eunki has been doing lately, and giving glowing reviews of the nice Chinese guy Eunki is dating now, and describes how serious Eunki and Jung Jung are about one another, mentioning Eunki has already met Jung Jung’s family, so Jung Jung should come meet theirs.

“I know it’s a lot to think about,” Junki says sympathetically. “But it’s worth thinking about.”

Eunki nods slowly, knowing that he will only think about it a little before coming to the conclusion that he’s not ready to bring Jung Jung around to meet his parents.

 

Hyeran looks stunning in a red dress that drapes over her curves and accentuates everything about her figure, as if she didn’t already have golden proportions and was already the best dressed in the room. “Eunki!” she smiles at him and drops a kiss on his cheek. “I’m so glad you’re here.”

“Hi, noona,” Eunki smiles. “How are you?”

“I’m fantastic. Oh, Jung Jung, it’s so nice to see you again.” Jung Jung beams when Hyeran kisses him too. “Just running around trying to rub shoulders with everyone, you know.”

“I’m sure everyone’s charmed by you, noona,” Eunki laughs. “Are you here on your own?”

“No, I came with Taehyun, I thought it’d be good for him to network too, but I haven’t seen him for a while.” Hyeran sighs. “I’m sure he’s somewhere.”

“I’ll find him, noona.”

Hyeran laughs as she smooths the lapels on Eunki’s jacket. “That would be good. Thank you, Eunki.”

Eunki isn’t sure why Taehyun would be hiding in a place like this. Taehyun is pretty social and moreover, he should be networking like Hyeran suggested, he should to try to put his services as an (exceptional) choreographer out there. Hyeran had been nice enough to get Eunki and a plus one on the guest list to this holiday mixer so Eunki sure didn’t want to squander the chance to meet some people who were important in the Korean dance scene (and had further connections in the business).

Yet Eunki feels a certain sense of loyalty to Taehyun that gets him to keep his eyes peeled for his figure among the people around him. Jung Jung is doing a better job of mingling than Eunki is, and is being his usual affable self while elegantly holding a flute of champagne in his long fingers. But Jung Jung is also drinking too much so eventually Eunki coaxes him outside to get some air and that’s when Eunki finds Taehyun, sitting on the balcony and sulking.

“Hyung!” Eunki tugs Jung Jung along with him. “Aren’t you cold out here?”

“I’m okay,” Taehyun answers. Yes, definitely sulking.

“Are you sure?” Eunki questions.

Taehyun glances furtively at Jung Jung who looks solemnly at Eunki. “Are we telling secrets?” Jung Jung asks.

Eunki nods. “Yes, hyung, we are. So secret that what you hear can’t leave this balcony.”

Jung Jung places a finger against his lips and nods, but then giggles as he rests on Eunki’s shoulder and takes another sip of his champagne.

“What’s wrong?” Eunki asks Taehyun, who is still staring at Jung Jung.

“I told you I was okay,” Taehyun sighs.

Eunki guides Jung Jung to sit beside him next to Taehyun. “Hyung. You’re sulking. Hyeran noona said you disappeared on her and she couldn’t find you.” Eunki sighs. “She said she wanted you to try networking with some people.”

“That’s the thing,” Taehyun grumbles. “I’m just really… intimidated?” He shrugs. “I don’t know what to say to anyone.”

“What do you mean? You’re a choreographer and you’ve done all of these things…”

“I’m not working as a choreographer now,” Taehyun sighs. “And everything I did was at the collegiate level. And I’m old. I hate my job. I went back to school to get out of a dead end job I hated and ended up in another job I hate except I hate it for different reasons.”

Eunki frowns. Recently when he’s seen Taehyun, he had been stressed out and complaining a mile a minute about how the assistant to the choreographer job he applied for was nothing like he thought it would be, and that he wasn’t doing anything productive or useful and he hated it.

“And I just feel really inadequate, especially next to Hyeran, and that just gets me thinking that I’m just riding her coattails and that she can do better than me…”

“Oh, hyung,” Eunki sighs as he scoots closer to Taehyun. “That’s not true. Noona loves you.”

“I know, but I feel weird. I’ve known her forever and she’s so successful, she’s got the academy, she has employees, she’s building a brand, she has her life together, and I haven’t been able to get my act together for the past five or so years. I still live with the same five idiots and whenever I crash with Hyeran I think I’m taking advantage of the space she works hard to afford. And her cat hates me.”

“I don’t think Hyeran is worried about that,” Eunki offers Taehyun’s crestfallen face. “She loves you, so she just wants you to do your best.”

Taehyun sighs. “I just thought I’d be doing better by now.”

“Hyung, you’re doing just fine.”

Taehyun frowns. “I don’t feel like it.”

Eunki frowns. He wonders why Taehyun is so different even though they haven’t spent that much time apart. It suddenly feels like they haven’t spoken in ages, even though they do talk all the time despite not getting to see much of each other face to face like this, Eunki being busy with work and school and Taehyun with his job and other adult responsibilities. But Eunki doesn’t remember a time when he’s ever seen Taehyun this downtrodden.

“What happened to my confident Taehyun hyung?” Eunki asks. “I don’t remember you like this.”

Taehyun sighs. “Because I used to know what I was doing. I feel aimless again.”

Eunki leans on Taehyun’s shoulder and Jung Jung leans with him. “Hyung, everything is going to be fine.”

Taehyun hums softly. “I know. I’m just thinking too much.”

“Come on, hyung,” Eunki laces their fingers together and tugs both Taehyun and Jung Jung to their feet. “Let’s go back inside.”

Taehyun lets himself be led and after Eunki deposits Jung Jung in a chair he steers Taehyun around the room and they talk to people, Taehyun eventually getting his bearings and acting more like the Taehyun that Eunki knows. They bump into Hyeran and she smiles at Eunki brightly when Taehyun goes to her side and wraps an arm around her waist. Taehyun finally looks more relaxed and happy and Eunki leaves them to find Jung Jung again.

Luckily, Jung Jung has taken to chatting with people around the area Eunki left him and Eunki naturally fits at his side. They leave a little later, when Jung Jung is sufficiently tipsy and they say goodbye to Hyeran and Taehyun and hail a cab. Jung Jung’s head lolls on his shoulder as he dozes, and Eunki stares at him fondly.

Jung Jung is yawning as they slowly climb the steps up to their flat and as soon as they get inside he strips out of his suit and leaves a trail of clothes behind him as he collapses naked into their bed (and Eunki could faint because he knows that suit probably cost double their rent and he wonders how nice it must be to throw expensive clothes on the floor without a care like that). Eunki picks up after him and carefully gets undressed and curls up beside an already sleeping Jung Jung.

 

Eunki’s alarm always goes off way too early and he rolls over with a groan to turn it off. Like clockwork, Jung Jung rolls with him to wrap his arms around Eunki’s waist stubbornly. “Stay,” he implores, muffling his words against Eunki’s back. “It’s cold.”

“Maybe you wouldn’t feel so cold if you wore clothes to bed,” Eunki laughs as he loosens Jung Jung’s arms from his waist and gets up.

Jung Jung pouts at him. “But you wouldn’t like it if I wore clothes to sleep.”

“You got me there, hyung,” Eunki snorts as he bends down to peck Jung Jung on the lips.

Eunki shuffles to the kitchen to get a glass of water for Jung Jung and places it on the bedside table with a bottle of painkillers. He laughs when he sees Jung Jung has curled up under the blanket and has fallen back asleep. Eunki cards his fingers through Jung Jung’s dark locks before padding to the bathroom and stepping into the shower.

Jung Jung is still fast asleep when Eunki gets dressed, so he adds a note reminding Jung Jung that he would be out for most of the day and to dress warmly if Jung Jung decides to venture outside.

Eunki braves the cold only to walk into Insoo being a drama queen on the phone while Hwanwoong looks on unsympathetically.

“But when are you coming home?” Insoo, despite having his face pressed flat against the table, is perfectly audible due to the high pitch of his whining. Eunki sits as Insoo lets out an even more agonized whine. “Hyung, that’s too long. I miss you too much.”

Hwanwoong sighs and rolls his eyes while Eunki smiles sympathetically. Insoo continues to whimper into the table before finally snuffling, “bye, hyung, i love you,” and hanging up. Eunki can hear Insoo stomping his feet under the table and it might be endearing if Insoo were not a grown ass man in a public place but Eunki indulges it because it’s Insoo, and Insoo is a sensitive soul.

“You’re ridiculous,” Hwanwoong announces when Insoo finally props his head up on the table. “It’s been four days. And you’ve talked every day.” He lowers his voice. “And you probably fucked via webcam already.”

“It’s not the same,” Insoo huffs. “You wouldn’t understand. I want to be cuddled. I’m lonely.”

“How is it that Eunki was separated from Jung Jung for longer and yet his entire world didn’t crumble apart?” Hwanwoong sighs.

“Because Eunki had time to mentally prepare for it,” Insoo snaps.

Eunki pats Insoo on the shoulder soothingly. “He’ll be back soon.”

“No,” Insoo lets his forehead hit the table again. “He’s staying in Japan through his birthday. He’s going to be gone for a month. A month!”

“God, how did you survive when he was living over there?” Hwanwoong rolls his eyes as he raises his hand to hail a waiter. “I’ll have to tell Geonhee that this place has done nothing to cheer you up.”

“I don’t want to look at pretty waiters,” Insoo mumbles. “I want my Kenta.”

“Geonhee will be so disappointed…”

“Geonhee can kiss my whole ass…”

“Hwanwoong hyung!”

Eunki and Insoo both balk as one of the aforementioned pretty waiters suddenly embraces Hwanwoong and Eunki’s in shock because that’s definitely not professional behavior but then Eunki finally gets a look at his face and realizes it’s Joo Haknyeon and suddenly Eunki is wondering where his hug is too. “Eunki hyung!” Ah, there’s his hug.

Insoo is staring. “Am I missing something?”

“Showcase last year,” Eunki answers as he lets Haknyeon go with a squeeze. “How are you Haknyeonie?”

“I’m really good, hyung,” Haknyeon is brightly smiling and Eunki can’t help but smile back. “How are you?”

“Good, good,” Eunki smiles.

“Oh, wait,” Haknyeon glances over his shoulder. “I should take your order. What can I get you?”

Haknyeon scurries away back towards the kitchen after taking their order and Hwanwoong and Eunki stare after him. “I guess he’s doing well,” Hwanwoong mentions. “I don’t see him too often anymore, but I guess he must be taking care of himself.”

Eunki nods as Insoo begins to fidget. “Are we not paying attention to me anymore?”

“No, and I never was,” Hwanwoong barks and Insoo begins to sulk. “Your boyfriend is homesick, aren’t you sympathetic?”

“Of course I am,” Insoo huffs. “But that doesn’t mean I don’t miss him.”

Hwanwoong groans. “Why are you so pathetic?”

Insoo scowls across the table and leans into Eunki. “Eunki, Hwanwoong is being mean to me. It’s just because he’s bitter and lonely because no one likes him.”

“Just be nice,” Eunki sighs. “Kenta hyung will be back soon. He’s probably buying you lots of presents and is enjoying his first time home in a while. He’s been really good to you, this is the first time he’s mentioned wanting to go home.”

“I know,” Insoo whines. “I know.”

Haknyeon comes back, accompanied by another pretty pink haired waiter, with their food and Eunki sighs at how much Insoo has ordered for himself. Haknyeon chats while setting down their dishes. He and some friends had started performing together and were working on getting street casted, but in the meantime they had taken up working so they could take better financial care of themselves. Haknyeon smiles brightly at them as he leaves them and Eunki feels a swell of pride seeing Haknyeon brightly talking about his future.

“Must be nice,” Insoo remarks as he begins to shovel tteokbokki into his mouth. “To have things figured out like that.”

Hwanwoong nods. “Must be nice to still have all that optimism too.”

Eunki hums in agreement as he swipes a gimmari from Insoo’s plate and bites into it.

Eunki doesn’t actually think he’s become a pessimist at all, but the reality of graduating weighs on his mind more as he begins to think of what he has to prepare for his thesis performance and what kind of future awaits him. He thinks he wants to continue pursuing his dance education through the master’s level, and working at Hyeran’s academy was great job experience, but he wanted to perform. Taehyun’s situation fills him with nerves because Eunki wonders just how common it is, to get stuck in a job in the field but remaining unfulfilled. But Eunki still thinks he has a brighter outlook on his future than either Insoo or Hwanwoong do, because Insoo has been expressing thoughts that sound a lot like Taehyun’s feelings of aimlessness and Hwanwoong sounded so uncertain about what path he wanted.

“I should have majored in sports like Gunmin hyung,” Hwanwoong heaves out a sigh. “At least I’d know what kind of job was waiting for me at the end of my university life.”

“Is it too late to change majors?” Insoo echoes.

Eunki just chuckles softly to himself. He remembers this from living with Taehyun and Junyoung, remembering the agony when faced with entering real adulthood. Eunki thinks Junyoung had managed to put it off a bit more by going to grad school and Taehyun had already met briefly with the real world when he graduated university the first time. And they have time too, Eunki decides he won’t worry just yet.

 

Jaechan is chewing his lower lip in earnest and Eunki really wants to make him stop because it’s so windy and if Jaechan chews his lip like that they’ll only become more chapped in the cold and then they’ll probably split and bleed.

“But I really don’t know what to get him,” Jaechan says, his forehead creasing with worry.

“Get him a book?” Eunki suggests.

Jaechan shakes his head. “Sangbin hyung has so many books. I wouldn’t even know what he’d want.”

“Give him yourself,” Insoo drones. “Get naked and tangle yourself up in some red ribbons and tell him you’re his present.”

“I’m not going to do that!” Jaechan squeaks.

“You really can’t think of anything he might want?” Eunki prods.

“That’s what happens when two people get together and just lay around and fuck and OWW!!”

“I’m so sorry! I didn’t mean to hit you that hard!” Jaechan is trembling as Insoo rubs his shoulder.

Insoo looks like he’s on the verge of an emotional breakdown. “I gave birth to you,” he hisses. “I pushed you out of my own asshole and this is how you repay me.”

“Since when did you become Jaechannie’s mother?” Eunki demands.

“That’s what you’re worried about why didn’t you raise our baby properly look at him he just punched me!”

“Because you were yelling about my sex life!”

“So you do have one!”

Jaechan’s face is bright red. “That’s not what I said!”

“I’ll kill that hyung,” Insoo sniffs. “Chop off his dick and make him eat it.”

“Please just help me figure out what to buy Sangbin hyung,” Jaechan whines.

“I can only help you if you’re going to buy Sangbin a sexy present,” Insoo states. “I don’t know what repressed gay poetry he’s into, so I can’t help you buy him books, but I know everything about what he likes in bed.”

Jaechan’s face is still flushed as he grumbles about not needing Insoo’s help, which Insoo hears, and decides to stomp off in a temper.

Eunki sighs. “He’s even more delicate than usual because he misses Kenta hyung.”

“I know,” Jaechan sighs. “But you understand right?” He looks at Eunki anxiously. “Sangbin hyung spends way too much money on me and I want to get him something nice in return.”

Eunki wraps an arm around Jaechan’s shoulders. “Oh, my baby, there’s just something about you that makes older men want to spend money on you.”

Jaechan’s bright red again. “Oh, hyung, when you say it that way!”

Eunki laughs. “I’m just teasing you.”

He and Jaechan walk around trying to figure out what Sangbin might want, before settling on clothes, which Eunki thinks Jaechan buys way too much of, but maybe Jaechan thinks Sangbin is sorely lacking in fashion sense. (Eunki finds that plausible.)

“Thank you for helping me out today, hyung,” Jaechan says.

Eunki smiles. “No problem.”

 

“No, hyung, that’s hot, you’ll burn your…” but Jung Jung has already sunk his teeth into a piping hot hotteok and, predictably, burns his mouth. While he hoots in pain, trying to cool off his mouth, Eunki tries to explain the finer points of eating hot food. “You have to take a little bite and then blow on it.”

“Blow?” Jung Jung asks around his mouthful of food.

The look on Seunghyuk’s face could make small children cry. “Do not blow in his mouth.”

“I wasn’t going to,” Eunki says hotly, despite that being exactly what he planned to do. Eunki also wishes Seunghyuk would turn his judgmental attention to Hyungseob and Woojin behind him who were sharing one hotteok and were even more cringeworthy and cute than he and Jung Jung were being.

Especially when Hyungseob gets bits of japchae on his face and Woojin carefully brushes it off with his thumb. Which would be fine, except then their eyes meet and suddenly the atmosphere is thick with tension and Euiwoong chokes.

“I’m getting out of here before they start sucking face again,” Euiwoong declares.

It’s enough to break the spell Hyungseob and Woojin fell under because they both round on Euiwoong to insist that they were absolutely not going to suck each other’s faces, but Euiwoong and Seunghyuk just regard them with disbelieving looks and postures indicating that they know what Hyungseob and Woojin were going to do (which is, suck face).

Jung Jung is blowing carefully on his hotteok and bites into it more carefully, face splitting into a grin as he chews. “Is it good?” Eunki asks him and Jung Jung nods enthusiastically.

Hot food warming them sufficiently, they walk to the ice skating rink and Euiwoong and Seunghyuk groan at Woojin helping Hyungseob tie the laces on his rental skates. Eunki groans when the happy couple take to the ice confidently only to cling to each other’s arms and creak around like a couple of newborn deer who haven’t gotten their legs under them quite yet. Seunghyuk and Euiwoong skate circles around them, Eunki assumes they must be making little verbal jabs because Hyungseob starts yelling at both of them, though it only makes Seunghyuk and Euiwoong laugh.

Jung Jung laces his fingers with Eunki’s as they glide around the ice. It’s not bitterly cold outside and Eunki can chat about mundane things and remind Jung Jung they need to stop at the grocery on the way home and everything is normal and pleasant.

 

“We have a proposition for you.”

Hojung elbows Moonkyu in the side. “That’s not the right word for this, dumbass.”

Moonkyu elbows him back. “Not important. Anyway, since Taehyun isn’t listening to any of us and Sungwoon’s being gay…”

Hojung yells over him, “Meaning that Sungwoon is advocating listening to Taehyun but we disagree.”

“I’m just as gay as Sungwoon? Maybe gayer?” Eunki offers but both of them ignore him.

“Convince Taehyun to propose to Hyeran,” Moonkyu says.

Eunki sputters.“Do you know how long it took to convince him to ask her about being exclusive?”

“He comes back mooning over her and whining about not being good enough for her and we’re all tired of it.” Hojung sighs. “Honestly, we wanted to ask Hyeran to just propose to him but Junhyuk said that would make Taehyun feel like his dick was tiny and he’d run away scared.”

“So talk him into it,” Moonkyu says as he slaps the table and rises. “We’re counting on you.”

Eunki blusters because why him but Moonkyu and Hojung have both stood up and are making to leave so Eunki can’t do anything with the task he’s just been given.

 

Eunki frowns and twists in his seat. Junyoung’s really late.

“Stop fidgeting,” Taehyun sighs. “He probably got stuck in traffic.”

“Or got lost,” Hyunmin pipes up from where he’s curled up on Eunki’s arm. “This place was a little hard to find.”

Yongbin snorts. “He’s probably just running late. He says his roommates are noisy. I bet he overslept.”

As if on cue, Junyoung rushes inside the restaurant, shaking snow off of his coat, and then striding over to their table. “Sorry,” he says breathlessly. “Did you all wait long?”

“Hyung,” Hyungseob looks a bit mystified. “You look really nice. Were you running late because you took so long to get dressed?”

Junyoung suddenly groans heavily.

“Hyung?” Woojin hazards as Junyoung drops his head against the table.

“No,” Junyoung sighs. “I was preventing a catastrophe from happening.” No one says anything so he elaborates. “My three dumbass roommates were trying to go out drinking…”

“At noon?” Hyungseob squawks.

“At noon. In the snow. Wearing santa suits.” Junyoung sighs. “I waited as long as I could and convinced them they’d freeze to death if they went through with that stupid plan.” He shakes his head. “I bet those idiots still went out anyway.”

Eunki has actually only met Junyoung’s roommates once, at Junyoung’s graduation, and yet from what he saw of them - extremely noisy, indifferent to proper modicums of behavior in public, and noisier when drunk - Junyoung’s story is perfectly sensible.

After Junyoung gets over the trauma of explaining his lateness, he gets to start on another tragic story of his graduate research, and Yongbin merrily joins in complaining about actors and the nice All Back reunion quickly dissolves into a bitchfest and Eunki kind of thought it would be like this, but he doesn’t really mind because it feels so normal to be gathered together and complaining like this.

 

Eunki isn’t sure why he ends up playing truth or drink with Hwanwoong, Sangbin, and Insoo in Insoo’s apartment on Christmas Eve, but he’s pretty sure it has something to do with Kenta being away and Insoo being lonely.

Eunki didn’t mind the idea of getting together with his friends on Christmas Eve, except Insoo was already drunk when they arrived and had belligerently demanded they all play games. Eunki is further annoyed by Insoo’s game of choice, because Eunki doesn’t want to drink much at all because he has plans tomorrow and doesn’t need a hangover.

Sangbin is wearing one of the shirts Eunki helped Jaechan pick out so he asks if Jaechan went home to visit his parents and Sangbin nods.

Insoo plops his chin on Sangbin’s shoulder. “You,” Insoo slurs, jabbing Sangbin’s chest with his finger. “Truth or drink, you and Jaechannie had sex, didn’t you?” Sangbin cocks one eyebrow at Insoo and takes a swig from his can. Insoo’s jaw drops as he slaps Sangbin’s chest. “You slut,” Insoo snivels. “I can’t believe you did that to my baby.”

“He’s my baby,” Sangbin reminds Insoo as he pushes him off his shoulder.

“Insoo is just sex obsessed right now,” Hwanwoong says with a sigh.

“That’s right,” Insoo declares as he immediately plops down in Hwanwoong’s lap. “I have the world’s most embarrassing credit card bill. It’s all late night grocery runs and sex toys.”

Hwanwoong flips Insoo off of his lap. “I hate you,” he says witheringly. “You’re gross.”

“It’s not the same as the real thing,” Insoo says mournfully. “I want to be cuddled. I could never be a camboy.”

“Nobody asked you!” Hwanwoong yelps, pushing Insoo farther away from him.

“Eunki,” Insoo whimpers. “Everyone is being mean to me.”

“Because you’re oversharing,” Eunki sighs as he pats Insoo’s head.

“I miss my boyfriend,” Insoo says.

“We know.” Eunki says soothingly.

Eunki parks Insoo and Hwanwoong in front of the television and they end up drunkenly arguing about the finer points of the plots of children’s Christmas movies until they both pass out on each other’s shoulders. Eunki picks up the beer cans they’ve been going through and puts them in a recycling bag for Insoo and rinses out their dirty cups in the sink. Sangbin has the window open to smoke.

“Have you and Jaechannie slept together?” Eunki asks. If Sangbin gets annoyed with him, Eunki will blame it on how much he drank (even though if Sangbin was being observant, he would know Eunki barely drank anything).

Sangbin raises his eyebrows. “Are you going to nag me about it too?”

“I was just wondering because you drank when Insoo asked you about it.”

“I drank to push Insoo’s buttons,” Sangbin flicks cigarette ash out the window. “No, we haven’t.” Eunki must have made a face because Sangbin snorts. “Are you surprised?”

“Honestly, yes,” Eunki shrugs as he turns off the faucet. “I thought you’d both rush it after you started dating officially.”

Sangbin shakes his head. “We’re not.” Sangbin snuffs out his cigarette and drops it into the sink and runs water over it. “He’s afraid that it’s going to be painful, so we’re not rushing into anything. Obviously I don’t want to hurt him.”

Eunki nods. “He was fussing a lot about your present because he said you spoil him so much.”

“I want to spoil him because he’s mine,” Sangbin turns off the faucet again and runs his hand through his hair. “That makes sense, doesn’t it?”

Eunki hums in agreement. “Of course it does, hyung. I’m glad you’re so serious about Jaechan.”

“Like I couldn’t be serious about him with all these guys breathing down my neck,” Sangbin rolls his eyes. “You, Insoo, Taedong, Donghan, and one of his housemates - all of you are pains in my ass.”

“He’s our precious baby,” Eunki says. He glances over to where Hwanwoong and Insoo have gradually slid onto the floor. “Are you staying here or should I wake them? I have to go back home.”

“I can stay here with them,” Sangbin claps Eunki on the shoulder. “I’ll see you around.”

“I’ll see you, hyung,” Eunki says as he traipses out, patting Insoo and Hwanwoong’s sleeping heads as he leaves.

 

Jung Jung is standing in front of their mirror, with heaps of clothes draped over his arms, and in a panic.

“What should I wear?” Jung Jung’s brow is knit with worry.

Eunki smiles at him fondly as he removes some of the clothes and lays them out on the bed. Junki invited them out to dinner with his fiance at a really expensive restaurant (well, expensive perhaps only to Eunki who is a poor and starving university student). But it tickles him to see Jung Jung so worried about his appearance, when any of the outfits he’s picked for himself would suit him well.

“I want to look my best,” Jung Jung says sincerely. “So I impress your brother.”

“Oh hyung, you’ll look handsome no matter what,” Eunki smiles. “And Junki already likes you a lot.”

Jung Jung pouts for a moment and then he smiles broadly. “Then you should pick something out so we match.”

Eunki laughs because he isn’t exactly what Jung Jung could wear to match Eunki’s really old suit, and Jung Jung seems to realize this as he holds up his clothes against Eunki’s chest. “This will fit you,” he says with authority. “You should wear this. It will look good on you.”

Eunki can see Jung Jung won’t budge even if he were to try protesting that he couldn’t possibly wear Jung Jung’s expensive clothes, but it is Christmas, and Eunki wants to appease his boyfriend by wearing his suit.

Jung Jung nods appreciatively when Eunki is finished changing into his suit. “You look so handsome,” Jung Jung says brightly. “You should always wear my clothes.”

“Do you think so, hyung?”

“Yes, I will buy lots of clothes for you to wear.”

Eunki laughs. “Hyung, where would we put them all? Our closet is already overflowing.”

Jung Jung purses his lips. “I will buy another closet too,” he declares.

Dinner is pleasant even if Eunki feels a bit nervous being in such a fancy restaurant and feeling like he’s lacking in table manners. Junki’s fiance - another model - is delightfully charming and she seems equally charmed by Jung Jung. Everything goes well up until Junki mentions visiting home again.

“Maybe after the New Year,” he suggests, as he cuts his steak into bite size pieces. He places a few pieces of steak on his fiance’s plate. “We’ll be there on the day, but I figured that you would probably spend it with friends.”

Jung Jung is looking at Eunki, who just manages an awkward smile and says he’ll need to look at his work schedule. That successfully gets Junki off the topic, because his fiance is very interested in Eunki’s work because she trained as a ballerina before getting into modeling. Eunki is happy to talk about his little ballerinas instead of the prospect of visiting home, and Junki lets him remain off the topic.

Jung Jung asks him when they get home later in the evening, “Shall we visit your home?”

Eunki sighs as he slides off his suit jacket. “I’m not sure. I am very worried about it.”

“What is worrying about it?”

“My father has not always been supportive of my dream to dance,” Eunki says. “And he was not happy to hear I was gay. Sometimes he says things that are unkind, and I don’t want him to say something mean to you.”

Jung Jung nods slowly. “I will go with you no matter what you decide,” he says. “Because I love you so much.”

Eunki leans in and they kiss, slowly and languidly as Jung Jung cups Eunki’s cheek and Eunki melts into the kiss as he pulls Jung Jung on top of him.

Eunki is happy that he doesn’t have to wake up to his usual alarm because it’s much more pleasant to wake up curled up on Jung Jung’s chest and to his happy, sleepy kisses.

 

Insoo is tapping at his phone screen and continuously zooming in and out of a picture, brow furrowed.

“What’s that?” Eunki asks, leaning over to see a picture of Kenta, seemingly at a Christmas party, with another guy in a santa hat. The other guy looks tall, given how he’s hunched over Kenta’s shoulders, and has a handsome, pleasant face.

“I’ve seen him before,” Insoo answers, zooming in on the other guy’s face again. “I know that face.”

“From Kenta’s other pictures?”

“No, I looked, but he’s not there. He’s not tagged either so I can’t find his page.” Insoo frowns. “It’s just bugging me that I can’t remember how I know him. But I’m pretty sure I do.”

Eunki looks, but the caption is in Japanese. “Ask Kenta?” he suggests.

Insoo just shrugs. “The caption says he’s a friend from uni that Kenta hasn’t seen in a while. Maybe I’m just hallucinating.” Insoo pockets his phone and sighs. “I’m kind of getting used to how quiet my apartment is and that’s weird.”

“He’ll be back soon,” Eunki says.

“I know,” Insoo sighs heavily. “I miss him a lot but I’m happy he’s enjoying his trip home.”

Eunki leans on Insoo’s shoulder. “I understand. I’m sure he misses you too.”

Insoo sniffs as he shuffles into Eunki’s side. “He better.” Insoo smiles a little. “We talked a lot yesterday. I’m just glad he’s enjoying himself. He said next time we’ll go together.”

“So you have something to look forward to,” Eunki says as Insoo nods and shuffles further into Eunki’s side.

 

“Is it just me,” Insoo is staring at Jaechan walking ahead of them. “Or is Jaechan walking a little funny?”

Eunki looks, and he can’t really tell because he doesn’t spend an awful lot of time looking at the way Jaechan walks, but he can see what Insoo is getting at. There’s something about the way Jaechan is gingerly walking that Eunki knows has set off a lightbulb in Insoo’s head. Whether or not there’s any truth to Insoo’s belief is a separate matter.

“You,” Insoo of course waits until they’re all sitting down and holding hot beverages, “you sat on Sangbin’s dick, didn’t you?”

Jaechan is blissfully not drinking his drink, or else it is plausible he would have choked on it or sprayed it out of his nose based on the noise that comes out of him. Hwanwoong is not so lucky and gags on his coffee.

“I did not!”Jaechan says shrilly. “Why would you ask me that?”

“You have a little waddle,” Insoo replies. “I know that waddle. You got laid.”

“I did not! And I am not waddling!”

“You can tell us,” Insoo pats Jaechan’s hand. “We can already guess that right after you came back home from visiting your family, Sangbin brought you back to his place and told you to unzip his pants for your present.”

“That is absolutely not what happened! Nothing happened! And Sangbin hyung’s roommates actually like me so I wouldn’t do anything to make them change their minds!”

“That makes one of us,” Insoo leans back in his seat. “Those two hate me.”

“Why? What did you do?” Hwanwoong asks.

“Why did I have to do something?” Insoo barks.

“Because you wound that up like you did something,” Eunki sighs. “Why don’t they like you?”

Insoo clears his throat. “During a very difficult time for me in the summer, I maybe passed out drunk in their bathroom and when I woke up asked Choi Dongha if I could take pictures of myself licking his tattoos.”

“Why.” Eunki groans. “Why would you do that? Any part of that?”

“I told you, it was a difficult time for me. But back on the topic of our baby getting a dick in him,” Insoo eyes Jaechan. “Had you already lost your virginity before I noticed this time?”

“We did not have sex!” Jaechan’s face is dark red.

“I understand you don’t want to make Yeo Hwanwoong feel excluded by being the only person at the table who hasn’t slept with Sangbin, but he missed his opportunity.”

“Insoo, for the last time, I am very straight,” Hwanwoong groans.

Jaechan sulks into his cocoa. “Hyung, I swear, I have not been having sex. Please stop asking me if I have.”

“Maybe you didn’t go the whole hog,” Insoo says dismissively, “but I’m sure you two…”

Eunki decides to cover Insoo’s mouth. “Okay, okay, let’s stop tormenting the baby.”

“Thank you,” Jaechan whimpers.

Insoo scowls for a bit but he cheers up considerably when Hwanwoong shoves a cookie into his mouth while grumbling about Insoo ruining his appetite so Insoo could eat it.

 

They gather for New Year’s Eve in Seunghyuk, Euiwoong, and Hyungseob’s dorm, though Hyungseob isn’t present.

“He’s with his boyfriend and their friends,” Euiwoong says. “I’m so happy I don’t have to see them kiss at midnight.”

“But you have to see Jung Jung hyung kissing Eunki hyung,” Seunghyuk points out. “And those two will probably be kissing.”

Sangbin and Jaechan don’t seem to mind being referred to as “those two,” possibly only because they’re distracted by Insoo hot headedly complaining about something to them. If Eunki had to guess, Insoo probably asked them some poorly time question about their sex life only to get rebuffed, setting Insoo off on a tirade. Eunki is just happy he’s sheltered in the kitchen with Jung Jung setting up glasses for drinks. Jung Jung had bought a painfully expensive bottle of champagne and was currently looking for a bottle opener. He finds it in the very back of a drawer and caws triumphantly as he rinses it off.

They put on New Year’s Eve programming and huddle around the couch and order Chinese takeaways and decide against breaking into the champagne right off the bat. Insoo gets jjajangmyeon sauce all over his face and only wipes it off when Eunki points it out.

“No one is even here to kiss me,” Insoo says somewhat bitterly as he mops the sauce off his chin. “It doesn’t matter if I get all greasy.”

“At least you have someone you would kiss,” Seunghyuk mumbles, equally bitter, under his breath. Euiwoong makes a big show of rolling his eyes at that.

Hwanwoong sends pictures of what his housemates are doing at their dorm, and it looks like pure chaos with instrumental accompaniment so Eunki is happy he decided to drag Insoo along with Jung Jung instead of letting him bother Hwanwoong and his housemates. (Since Insoo would just feed the chaos and probably lead Gunmin to have some kind of nervous breakdown.)

Jaechan eventually nods off on Sangbin’s shoulder and Sangbin cradles him with one arm, staring at Jaechan’s sleeping face fondly. They’ve finally broken into the champagne and it sits bubbling at the top of Eunki’s stomach. Honestly, Eunki would be happy falling asleep around now too, but he yawns and stretches to try to stay awake. Jung Jung seems completely wired beside him and Euiwoong is pouring cola into plastic cups. Eunki takes one and downs it in one go.

Insoo goes into Hyungseob’s unoccupied bedroom to take a call from Kenta right before midnight. Jaechan stirs awake and yawns into the crook of Sangbin’s neck while Euiwoong and Seunghyuk squabble as they try to connect a video chat with Justin in China (and it’s clearly taking too long as Seunghyuk starts huffing that they won’t call Justin in time and Euiwoong huffs back that he can’t control the speed of the internet in the Republic of Korea).

There’s a smattering of fireworks that Eunki can hear from outside as Jung Jung leans in to kiss him, and then there are only fireworks going off behind Eunki’s eyes as he holds Jung Jung’s hand.

“And there’s Jung Jung hyung kissing Eunki hyung…”

“Happy New Year, Zheng ge.” Even Justin’s tinny voice doesn’t pull Jung Jung away from Eunki even though Eunki can feel the hand on his hair disappear for a second and wonders how silly they look, still lip locked but Jung Jung is happily waving at a Justin who probably wishes he had been ignored.

 

Eunki goes into work in the new year thinking about the time he’ll need to take off. With Junki’s reassurance that both he and his fiance would be there, Eunki decided that he would visit home with Jung Jung. Thoughts about how many days he’d need to take off - probably two, one for the trip and another in case things went sour and Eunki needed a day to mope - occupy his mind so much that it takes him a full minute to notice there’s something sparkling on Hyeran’s fourth finger.

Eunki chokes on his spit. “Noona!”

“Oh? You finally noticed.” Hyeran laughs easily and holds out her hand for Eunki to gawk at what looks an awful lot like an engagement ring.

“When?”

“Yesterday.”

“Please don’t tell me Taehyun hyung just threw a ring box at you and yelled about how you might as well get married because of some reason.”

Hyeran laughs. “No, no, he did a good job. He gave a speech on one knee and everything, I even cried.”

“I’m so happy for you, congratulations,” Eunki’s a bit starstruck. “Honestly, I was supposed to talk to Taehyun hyung about proposing to you but I didn’t have a chance to meet him one on one, so I’m glad he did it anyway.”

“He mentioned a lot of people had been putting pressure on him but he realized it was the right time. He said a lot of self-deprecating things about making me wait for him long enough to just start dating so he wouldn’t make me wait as long to hear that he wants to get married.” Hyeran smiles. “It’ll be a while before we can even think about wedding planning, both of our careers need to be stable.”

“Congratulations, noona, I’m so happy for you both. I need to call Taehyun hyung later.” Eunki blinks. “Oh, but I needed to ask you, I need to take a couple of days off. I’m going to see my parents.”

“Of course, of course,” Hyeran nods. “Just let me know which days and I can get Minyoung unnie to cover your class.”

“Thanks, noona,” Eunki takes a final look at Hyeran’s ring. “Wow, Taehyun hyung has really good sense.”

Hyeran smiles fondly. “He does.”

 

Hwanwoong checks his watch. “Kenta hyung’s plane must have landed by now.” He takes a sip of his tea. “I thought you would have driven in with Insoo.”

“I thought about it,” Eunki nods. “But I realized that Kenta hyung is probably going to jump on him the second he gets off the plane and they’re probably going to stop off at a love motel if they can’t wait until they're back at their apartment.” He shivers delicately. “It’s probably best that they have the next couple of days to themselves.”

“Tomorrow’s Insoo’s birthday.”

“And I’m sure Insoo is expecting to stay in bed all day.”

Hwanwoong sighs. “I can’t stand him. We’re going to get a status report on his ass afterwards.”

“Yes, we are.”

They do. It’s even more graphic than usual because of the sex toys Insoo accumulated while Kenta was away and Insoo gives lots of details about how much Kenta enjoyed playing with them. Hwanwoong responds with angry face emojis and Eunki just writes back, “too much information.”

Insoo sends a picture of his middle finger (and Kenta’s shirtless, sleeping form can be seen, blurry in the background).

 

Taehyun gets treated to a lot of slaps on the back from Junyoung and Yongbin when they go out to celebrate his engagement. Hyungseob, Woojin, and Hyunmin are awed by the news and have lots of questions about the wedding and whether or not they get to participate and Taehyun pinches Hyungseob and Woojin’s cheeks with too much force, promising that they can be the flower boy and ring bearer. Eunki is laughing with Sungwoon thinking of the image, until Hyunmin pipes up, “Hyung, can I be your best man?”

Sungwoon immediately begins to splutter that the job is already taken, when Taehyun wraps an arm around Hyunmin’s shoulders. “Yes, Byun Hyunmin, you can be the best man.”

When Sungwoon gets up, presumably to storm off, Taehyun jumps to reassure him. “Hey! I was joking! Why are you so sensitive!”

Sungwoon starts to blow up about how he deserves to be Taehyun’s best man because he was the only one who didn’t pressure Taehyun to propose and Taehyun listens to him sheepishly while everyone else tries to stifle their laughter.

 

Eunki’s stomach has worked itself into knots as he sits beside Jung Jung on the bus. Jung Jung’s thumb gently strokes circles into the back of Eunki’s hand and smiles at him warmly. Jung Jung certainly looks soft and cozy, and Eunki enjoys the feeling of Jung Jung’s soft sweater against his cheek.

“You know, hyung,” Eunki says as the house comes into view. “We still have a chance to run away.”

Jung Jung’s eyes sparkle as he smiles. “I will run anywhere with you. Even away.”

Eunki can’t help but smile back at that. He takes a steadying breath. “Let’s just run forward, hyung.”

Jung Jung nods as Eunki rings the bell. His brother answers the door with a relieved smile. Eunki holds his breath as he steps into his childhood home. Somehow, it doesn’t surprise him that things look the same as he remembers them. His mother hugs him tightly and Jung Jung bows to her deeply and greets her with a bright, warm smile.

Eunki bows stiffly to his father, who returns the gesture just as stiffly. Jung Jung bows deeply to him too and the warmth of his smile doesn’t fade. His father nods to Jung Jung and Eunki begins to worry. It’s not like Junki promised things would be completely different, or if their father had really changed his attitude towards Eunki and his preferences at all. It might be one thing to hear it from Junki, and another to see it with his own eyes.

Junki suggests that his fiance and Jung Jung help their mother prepare the table for dinner while Junki catches Eunki by the arm and pulls him to another room with their father. Eunki feels immediately uneasy, standing across from his father. It reminds him of when he was younger, and he feels like he’s about to get scolded.

His father clears his throat. “I know that I said that there were many things you did that I disapprove of,” he begins. “But I have been talking to Junki, and I’m trying to understand more. And I want you to know that I’ve become comfortable with the way you live your life.”

Eunki blinks, unsure if he heard correctly.

“Even though I disliked you dancing, my heart is comfortable with it now. Your sexuality too, Junki tells me that you’re very happy, so I will be happy for you too.” His father takes a deep breath. “For resenting you and making you feel unwanted, I’m sorry.”

Eunki bursts into tears, but they’re relieved ones, happy ones, and his father embraces him tightly and Eunki hugs him back and it means so much to him to hear those words, I’m sorry. Eunki’s father is hugging him, and he can’t remember the last time, probably before he started high school and that was so long ago now. His father pats his back soothingly and Eunki composes himself. His father smooths out his hair affectionately and Eunki kind of wants to cry again, but he doesn’t.

Jung Jung leaps to his side when he returns, gently touching Eunki’s face. “Did you cry?” he asks, looking at Eunki’s face with concern, tension obvious in the line of his shoulders.

“Happy tears,” Eunki replies and he sees the tension melt out of Jung Jung’s body. “They were happy tears.”

Jung Jung smiles. “That is a relief.”

They sit down and Eunki’s mother gently lays her hand on his. “I am very happy for you,” she says, her voice tender, sweet with her sincerity. “You’ve met someone so lovely and I’m so happy and proud.”

Eunki’s heart swells again and his mother squeezes his hand. Eunki feels like weights have been lifted off of him as he sits with his family, Jung Jung beside him, and nothing feels out of place and everything feels right.

Notes:

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