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Girl Anachronism

Summary:

Missy wakes up in a glass cage. She's not sure how she ended up in UNIT headquarters, or why she escaped the Vault in a first place. One thing is certain, it was a hell of a night and she wants to go back home.

Inspired by a very cool tribute video by V1kte. Title from a song by The Dresden Dolls.

Notes:

Please, watch the video and go review it on Youtube if you want to share with the author !
I didn't make the video, and i'm not affiliated with the author. I just asked them in the comments to let me link their video ! I didn't even knew the Dresden Dolls before finding it in my Missy fueled recommendations ^^.

But you can also review my work, I'd be very happy :3.

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7s21cj6v1IY

 

 

When Missy opened her eyes, it felt like someone suddenly turned on the light. Figuratively and literally. She squinted her eyes at the bright white light. She was heavily restrained, and locked in a glass cage. She shivered. Things had really gone wrong.

 

 

She had felt a wee bit off with her head lately. Life in the Vault was becoming more and more oppressing. When the Doctor began talking about a girl he saw at his lectures, and how she seemed different from the rest of the crowd, angst got the best of her and she knocked the Doctor out with a chair.

It wasn’t a deliberate act. More a moment of panic. But the door was left ajar and it was the right timing, Eggman being busy elsewhere. So she ran away.

She didn’t take anything with her, not even her jacket. The Doctor had insisting taking it away from her, as well as her boots, insisting she didn’t need them indoor. She was only wearing a thin blouse, a cardigan and a pair of bloomers because she had spilled hot chocolate on her skirts and washed them immediately. And a fluffy pair of cats paws ornamented slippers

It was cold outside. She knew it was winter because of the seasonal settings of her Vault. Winter was the time with less light, warm glowing heaters and yummy grilled chestnuts. It was also the time of glittery pine trees, old white bearded men and treats without a motive. She liked winter because it was a comfortable season, but not outside of the vault, apparently.

It wasn’t snowing, it was just plain cold. The old half broken umbrella she had found in the warehouse hiding her Vault was useless. But she kept it for the aesthetic. There were no glistening ornaments either and Missy remembered having a fancy dinner with the Doctor and Nardole, and also receiving a bunch of new books, and chocolate boxes. It was late winter, the cold and boring one.

It was dark and a few students were still lingering on the campus. They didn’t even see her. To them, she wasn’t the most wanted creature of the universe. She was only plain woman having a late evening walk. It was a little infuriating, but probably a good thing for her escape plan.

She didn’t have any actual plan. Stealing the TARDIS wasn’t an option. The sooner she would be out of sight, the better it would be. She knew Nardole by reputation. Silly looking, but at his advantage : no one would ever suspect him to have such an impressive criminal record. Spy, con artist, had contacts with almost any mafia in the Universe. Not to be underestimated.

She had to be discreet. The nearer access to decent tech was in Cardiff, Torchwood HQ. UNIT was also out of her league in such conditions. She hated thinking like this, but with no weapon, no transport and two very competent aliens after her, she had to be careful.

 

Once in town, she received more looks from strangers. Her outfit must have play a big part in it. She was slightly out of period, and cruelly out of season. Fortunately, her body could adapt itself to the temperature, but it might blew those stupid apes brain to see a woman wandering half naked in the frost. To be honest, she felt a bit cold. Confined life hadn’t done any good to her.

Several people called her, but she had to resist her urge to kill. If she killed she would be caught and the Doctor would be very angry. He might even give her back to the authorities, as he promised. Missy didn’t want to be executed. And she didn’t want to see the Doctor angry. His eyebrows were scary when he got mad at her and it made her feel cold inside. She didn’t want to feel cold. She also felt very cold when he was talking about this girl. It wasn’t the same cold. It was cold, but scorching in the same time, like those desserts mixing ice cream and hot chocolate sauce. She liked the dessert, but not the feeling. She didn’t know how to call it so she didn’t tell the doctor. She only told Nardole and he told her it was jealousy. Jealousy was hot like anger, but also freezing like fear. She hated being jealous of a stupid human.

A kind woman took her by the arm. She must have gone a little bit too far into her own mind because she didn’t notice the stranger until she got her by the arm. The woman asked her lots of questions and Missy panicked. When she took off her own jacket to put on the Time Lady’s shoulders and began dialing the emergency line, Missy knocked her out and ran away.

The woman had money in her pockets. Not a lot, but enough to buy a ticket at the train station. There were a lot of dodgy looking people at this hour of the night, so no one paid too much attention to her. She was alone in the wagon and thought about the kind lady she had stolen the jacket from. It wasn’t really stealing, since she hadn’t realize he had it on her shoulders when she ran away. But she felt a little bit bad about it. The Doctor was rubbing on her? It was great time for her to go.

 

In Cardiff, it was even colder and darker. It would soon be midnight. Missy was hungry. She hadn’t eaten her dinner and the adventure was exhausting. She cringed a little. The last time she he had been this weak, she was blonde, round faced and all drumming inside.

She entered a Mac Donalds and ordered a Happy Meal because she only had a few pounds left. And the Doctor always ordered a Happy Meal for her because she liked the toys with the mouthless cat and the yellow rabbit with a lightning tail. It was weird for her to order because she had never lowered herself to go in such an unrefined place, and also because she had taken her habits with the Doctor.

She ate silently, bundled in a corner of the room. She must had looked miserable because the waitress offered her some tea and a caramel muffin.

“Do you have somewhere so stay tonight, love ?”

Missy looked up. The waitress was young and chubby. She had glasses, like the pretty one with the bow tie. Missy let her sit in the chair facing her. She was tired and company would be welcome. She had became weak.

“Hmm, ‘ve got an old frrriend herrre”, she mumbled with her thick Scottish accent. “Jack Harkness, will be surprised to see me.”

She smiled at the idea of crashing by Handsome Jack’s place. She wondered if he would recognize her.

“You seem to have been through a lot” continued the girl.

“Was locked up. I forgot this planet was so fucking cold.”

The girl seemed uncomfortable now. Not that Missy cared. The Time Lady took a sip of her tea.

“Locked up ? Like, in an institution ?”

“Nah, poppet. Just a friend of mine. Calls himself the Doctor but he isn't exactly a doctor. More a righteous twat. Locked me up in that basement room for my own safety, or some bullshit. Gonna be pissed off when he wakes up. But don't worry, I'll be gone of that bloody planet before he can catch me back !”

“Gone from this planet ? God ! Don't do anything stupid, sweetheart !”

The girl was way too sympathetic and patronizing for such a young creature. Missy snarled. She wasn't some lost girl wandering homeless. Maybe she was, but not this way. It was probably time to go before the waitress calls the emergency line. Thinking again, Missy wondered if the sudden compassion wasn't just part of her job as a night employee, to make sure tramps stop hanging around the restaurant.

“Sorry to leave you like this, yummy little earth girl, but I'm waited somewhere else ! T'was nice to talk to you.”

 

Missy left without glancing back, hoping the girl wouldn't give any signal. Maybe she should have killed her, but she didn't see the point. What was she going to say ? A Scottish nutter, probably a tramp or a whore judging by the outfit and the weird tale, came here and got away. Maybe she shouldn't have mentionned Jack Harkness. She would be gone before they find her anyways. It was nice to have a little chat. Maybe she should do like the Doctor and take pets more often.

She was back to the cold streets. Torchwood HQ was situated by Cardiff Bay. It wasn't that far if she hurried up. Most of the streets were empty, except for the pubs. Near the pubs, humans were more noisy, smelly and loud than anywhere else. Missy never liked this kind of chaos. She got cat called a few times, only answering with rude gestures. She finally decided to go by the dark and empty streets. More her style.

She was feeling the Time Rift more intensely, now. It was so good, so familiar and strange at the same time. She wished she was a TARDIS to take thirsty gulps in it, filling her mind and body with delicious artron energy.

“Are you lost, pretty thing ?”

Missy turned over to see two men lurking in the dark. Good, she thought. A little fight would make her feel alive. She had restrained herself too much with the nice ladies offering her help and tea. But no one would blame her for attacking thugs. It was an act of justice.

“Maybe. A lost girl with nothing to lose.”

The men crept closer, sinister smiles on their faces.

“Common, darling, we'll show you a good place to spend such a cold night.”

Missy grabbed her worn out umbrella, ready to fight.

“Say something nice” she purred.

Too late, the tallest man was behind her, taking her weapon away. She let out a piercing shriek.

 

 

 

It was past one in the morning. The Doctor was growing more and more agitated when the phone rang. He literally jumped to his desk, almost making Nardole fall on his way.

“Kate !” he exclaimed.

“Goodnight, Doctor. Hearing the tone of your voice, I guess we found what you were looking for. I need a good explaination from you.”

He was in UNIT headquarters within the minute, using the TARDIS despite Nardole's protests. Kate was waiting for him, a stern frown on her face. Heavily armed men were standing all around the place. Behind her Osgood was smiling brightly.

“Got a call from your friend Harkness. Apparently she tried to enter their alien weapons storage. Time Lady, batty looking, half naked and self proclaimed bananas. Rings a bell ?”

“Where is Missy ?” simply asked the Doctor, in no mood for sassy banter.

“We took her back with us. I thought she was dead. According to most of intergalactic registers she is.”

“I know. They let me dispose of her body. I cheated a bit, however, but they never said she had to be dead.”

“I don't want to know” deadpaned Kate, almost hearing Jack's witty remark at the disposal of her body part.

“She's no danger, I swear. I put her in a secure place, more secure than any earth prison, or most prisons in the universe. Tonight was an accident.”

“An accident that costed at least two lives.”

The Doctor gulped with a guilty look. Osgood felt better to precise.

“The two men attacked by Cardiff Bay weren't innocent bystanders. They were both known by the police for several illegal activities and acts of violence. Judging by Missy's general attitude and the bruises she has, it was probably self defense. I wouldn't be surprised if they had taken adventage of her.”

The Doctor almost jumped out his skin and Kate glanced an angry look to Osgood. Now the Time Lord seemed almost distressed.

“She's okay. We didn't procede to a detailed examination for obvious security reasons, but she probably killed them before they... well, she just had a big fear.”

“I need to see her !” cried the Doctor, almost in panic.

Kate took him to a creepy looking underground base, full of heavy doors and security protocoles, to finally arrive to the place Missy was held into. She was in a cold looking and sterile glass cage, chilling parody of her comfortable forcefield back home. Heavily restrained with chains, she was bundled in a corner. None of the impassive guards batted an eye to her distressed body language. The Doctor felt anger rise inside him. Osgood must had felt it, because she kindly offered an explaination.

“We called you as soon as we learned you were in Bristol. She kept asking us to call you and refused to be approached if you weren't there.”

“Thanks.” said simply the Doctor.

He walked to the glass walls and called nicely.

“Hey, Missy. I'm here.”

She got up on her feet in one leap and the Doctor made a sign with his head to the guards. The glass wall slided and the Doctor entered the cage, catching Missy before she jumped out.

“I'm here, now. It's over, we're going back home.”

Missy almost melted in his arms, burying her face in his jacket.

“Calm down, love. We're in public.”

She really looked battered, her hair in a mess of tangled curls, floating in a coat twice too big for her she found God knows where, her tiny legs only covered by worn out stocking. It wasn't hard to guess she would have attracted any perverted man in town. It was a miracle she only had one deadly encounter. She was almost sleepwalking, her face hidden in the Doctor's neck. He stroked her hair absent mindly, while talking to Kate. She finally understood the Time Lady needed rest and let them go, not without a friendly reminder next time she wouldn't be so understanding.

 

 

Back to the Vault, Missy didn't say a word. The Doctor couldn't get angry at her, not after seeing her in such a state. So he didn't listened to Nardole's ramblings and instead send him away looking for grilled chestnut and hot chocolate.

“At this time of the night, mid February ?”

“Use the TARDIS, bloody nitwit !”

Missy chuckled softly under the fluffy blanket the Doctor had wrapped around her.

“Common, Missy, you're gonna take a good bath and when we can talk about what you did tonight. Don't think you will be so easily forgiven just because you had a bad time.”

“Can you wash my hair ?”

She sounded so innocent the Doctor sighted. If it was the only way to check on her bruises. He went to the bathroom and let the water run, testing the temperature from time to time while Missy removed her ragged clothes. She was skinny, the Doctor noticed. It was strange, she ate well and couldn't over exercise with only a few hours of gym per day. She had been quite healthy during her latest years in the Vault, settled in good habits. She even got used to brush her teeth every evening, even if it was useless for her Time Lord physiology. The Doctor found those tiny habits endearing. Since when did she became so dirty and ill looking ?

“Come here, sweetheart.”

He hated talking to her like this, but it seemed what she needed. He helped her in the tub, making sure she was warm and comfortable. Aside from her alarming thin limbs and visible ribcage, she didn't seem hurt. He took her favourite lavender shampoo and began massaging her hair from the scalp. He could almost hear all her thoughts. She was mentally purring like a cat.

 

Later in the early morning, Missy was snuggling with the Doctor next to the heaters. He peeled chestnuts for her, internally cringing on how much he was pampering her when she just made her biggest mistake in almost a century.

“Can we talk now ?” he asked sternly.

“Hmm. Yeah, whatever you want.”

“I'm serious. Why did you do this ? I mean, knocking me out and running away.”

“I'm a prisonner, I escape. Simplest law in the universe.”

“You're not. Well, technically you are, but you like being here. You feel safe and happy with us, don't you ?”

Missy played with a loose thread of her cats patterned pyjamas. The Doctor waited, stroking her head in a soothing way.

“I don't want you to go with this girl. I'm gonna be all alone with the egg.”

“First of all, stop calling Nardole an egg. He's nice with you. And why would I go with Bill ?”

“You like her.”

“Yes, I do. But I do love you.”

“You love me more ?” She asked childishly.

“No. I love you differently. She's my friend and so are you. I would never, ever let you down. Please, trust me Master. Never ever."

Missy smiled and closed her eyes.

“A nice woman bought me tea at the Mac Donalds” mumbled Missy. “I think she was pitying me, but it felt nice. And I was really cold.”

The Doctor chuckled.

“You didn't even put clothes. I can't believe you were running half naked by this weather. But yes, you would be surprised by the kindness humans can show to any creatures.”

“Then those men did really nasty things. But they won't do harm anymore now.”

“We'll talk about that too tomorrow. Go to sleep now. I'll stay with you if you want.”

Missy nodded and the Doctor pecked a soft kiss on her forehead.

 

 

Notes:

I really love reading angsty hurt and comfort fics, but ironically I feel out of my comfort zone writting them. I always think a vulnerable and insane Missy will be OOC, and i have to remember this is a fanfiction, so i can write OOC ^^. I hope she's still a little bit Missy.
Oh, and i wrote it on one stand, so it might be full of typos ^^.

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