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Mondo had always figured that when someone died it was just over. No heaven, no hell, no nothing. Just complete emptiness. But he was wrong.
When the bike he was strapped to came to a stop, he easily climbed off of it. Was that all, he had wondered. Yeah, it hurt like hell at the beginning but then everything went numb. It was over, so why was he still conscious? Why could he still hear and see and speak? Did Monobear fail to kill him or something?
He was ripped from his thoughts at the sound of loud, anguished screaming. He looked over to the gates where the various students stood to watch the execution. Ishimaru was clinging to the fence, his hands bleeding from squeezing it so tightly. He finally slid down to his knees, pounding his fists into the ground while sobbing loudly.
"Kyoudai?" Mondo asked. Was he really that upset about his death? Why was he so upset now when he had survived the execution? He walked through the now-open gates and knelt beside Ishimaru. "Hey, I’m alive, kyoudai. I’m right her-" He stuck his hand out to place it on Ishimaru’s shoulder in comfort, only for it to sink into him. "What the hell?!" He retracted his arm immediately and looked at it in confusion. His hand was fine… he was fine, wasn’t he? He tried to touch Ishimaru again and his hand once again sunk into the crying boy, who didn’t feel or notice a thing. "What the fuck…?" Just what the hell was going on? Why couldn’t he touch Ishimaru? Now that he thought about it, none of the other students were looking at him, either. Wouldn’t they be surprised that he was here, that the execution didn’t work? They were talking with one another about god knows what but paid absolutely no mind to him.
"Hey, Ishimaru?" Naegi said, walking over to Ishimaru nervously. "It’s time to go."
"Leave… leave me here…" Ishimaru said between sobs.
"All bastards must leave the execution room right now!" Monobear’s shrill voice shouted. Slowly, Ishimaru pulled himself up. He didn’t bother trying to wipe his tears away; more were going to replace them in a second.
"Hey, Kyoudai…?" Mondo asked. But Ishimaru walked straight through him and didn’t seem to feel him at all. That was when Mondo knew there was no denying it anymore; he was dead. He had died during the execution and he was wrong about there being nothing after death. After all, he was still here.
That night, he spent a little time searching around the school for someone, anyone that might be able to see him. He thought maybe he might find the other dead students, Chihiro, Leon, Sayaka or Junko around… but none of them were present. Why was that? He remembered when he was little Daiya used to tell him ghost stories, and said that what made someone a ghost was when they couldn’t move on from something when they had died. If that was the case, then what was keeping him back? In life, the only thing holding him back was the guilt over Daiya, but now that he was dead… what was keeping him here?
As the night progressed on, he found himself remembering more and more things that he had somehow forgotten. He had been here for two years, hadn’t he? They all had. He had become best friends with Leon and Chihiro and Ishimaru, of course. Several of the memories had Ishimaru in them, he realized. Ishimaru had accidentally photobombed a picture of him and Leon by rushing in at the last moment to put a scarf on him. The two of them had gone to a matsuri festival together, winning more prizes than they could carry. Mondo had tried to sneak up from behind Ishimaru to steal some of the Valentine’s chocolate he was making, only to get scolded by the hall monitor.
He was suddenly struck with the crippling realization that he and Ishimaru had been more than just kyoudais before all this. He remembered himself nervously shouting at Ishimaru if he would go out with him and Ishimaru replying with a sheepish “yes”. He remembered taking Ishimaru on dates outside of school, because that meant the two of them could hold hands without Ishimaru screaming “PDA!!” when he tried. He remembered taking Ishimaru to the beach one day, and Ishimaru shyly asking if he could kiss him as they walked across the shore, and of course Mondo had complied. The two of them were so inseparable, so close… yet everything had gone wrong.
Mondo made his way back to Ishimaru’s room, and easily phased through the door. He was disheartened to find Ishimaru still awake and still sobbing his heart out. He was laying on his side, clinging to a pillow and crying into it to muffle his sobs. That idiot, Mondo thought. Didn’t he know the rooms were soundproof? Even now, was he more worried about keeping his classmates awake than he was about his own damn sorrow?
"Kyoudai… kyoudai…" Ishimaru moaned. He gripped the pillow tighter with shaky hands. "I’m so sorry… I should have done something I… let you die… I’m so sorry…”
Why the hell is he apologizing? He didn’t do a damn thing. Ishimaru was always like this, even before all of this had happened. He took on the role of leader, and whenever something went awry, he refused to blame anyone except himself.
"It’s all right…" Mondo said. He knew his words couldn’t reach Ishimaru, but he sure as hell was going to try. "Baby, it’s alright. Ya didn’t do anythin’, okay?"
"Kyoudai…" Ishimaru was still sobbing profusely. Mondo would do anything to be able to reach out and wipe his tears away, to hold him close and reassure him that he was fine, but he knew that he couldn’t do anything but watch the most important person in his life sob the night away.
Around three am, Ishimaru’s sobs finally turned to whimpers, and the tears stopped streaming down his cheeks; likely because there weren’t any tears left.
"Kiyotaka, go to bed." Mondo whispered. "Ya need rest, so ya can get up early tomorrow for those big ass meetings ya always hold." He rested his hand above Ishimaru’s chest in an attempt to hold him. "Go to sleep, baby, ya need it, okay?" His grip loosened and his hands slid off the pillow, and Mondo could see the thin scars that crisscrossed his palms. That idiot… hurting himself over me like that… Mondo leaned in and kissed Ishimaru’s palms. He couldn’t feel anything beneath his lips but it was the gesture that counts, right? He finally laid down beside him, wrapping an arm around Ishimaru’s waist.
"Kyoudai…" Ishimaru mumbled. He trembled beneath the sheets, tears threatening to fall from his eyes again.
"Shh, I’m right here." Mondo said. He ran a hand through Ishimaru’s hair and felt nothing. "If only ya knew that."
The next day, Mondo had hoped Ishimaru would be a little better. He wasn’t crying anymore, but that certainly didn’t mean he was better. He hadn’t slept; he just cried most of the night away, and when the tears stopped, he just lay there, staring at the ceiling. When morning came, he just sat up that morning and did his usual routine, but the whole time he just stared foreword listlessly at nothing. He dragged himself to the cafeteria a little later than usual, and ended up arriving after Sakura and Asahina. He took his seat silently and didn’t say a word to anyone as they all filed in. He didn’t even bother to get himself something to eat. He just sat there, his eyes fixated on absolutely nothing.
"Is he all right?" Naegi whispered to Asahina.
"He hasn’t spoken since… yesterday." She replied. The two of them looked nervously at Ishimaru but said nothing.
"It’s always the ones like him that break easiest." Togami muttered.
Mondo was livid at this point. Why the fuck did none of them give a shit? He wasn’t upset that they didn’t seem to care that he was dead. That didn’t matter anymore. He was guilty and death was really the only option. But how come none of them were even trying to help Ishimaru? He was the one that attempted to comfort Naegi when Sayaka died. He was the one that tried to keep spirits high despite all of the terribleness. Yet no one even tried to comfort him, to talk to him or even give him the god damn time of day! And Togami… that bastard… he had the audacity to make fun of him?
"I’d beat the shit out of ya if I could." Mondo said, glaring at Togami.
A few days passed by and nothing changed in Ishimaru. Mondo continued following him around but honestly it was depressing as hell. He would get up and go to the meetings like always, but would never say a word or eat anything. He’d return to his room after that and keep himself cooped up in there, crying softly.
"Hey, Kiyo," Mondo said. He sat next to Ishimaru’s bed, resting his head on the sheets. "Come on… ya need to stop this…" Mondo thought he couldn’t feel more guilty than he did that day in the trial, but he was wrong again. How could he have done something like kill Chihiro like that? And how could he have done this to Ishimaru? Ishimaru was always a loud mouth, standing up straight and doing whatever he could to help out and keep his fellow classmates in line. But now? He was curled up in bed, hadn’t spoken a word in days and had locked himself away. Seeing him like this made Mondo want to die all over again.
"Hey…" Mondo looked over at Ishimaru’s bedside table and noticed an apple and a glass of water sitting there. A little while ago Naegi had brought them to Ishimaru’s room.
"I noticed you haven’t really eaten anything in the past two days…" He had said nervously. "Try to, uh, feel better, okay?" Ishimaru took the gift and said nothing to Naegi before shutting the door on him. With shaky hands he placed the food on the table and returned to the bed and never looked at them again.
"Ya gotta eat, man. Please." Mondo said. He had noticed Ishimaru growing weaker; his hands would shake whenever he picked something up and his stride was much slower when he actually bothered to leave his room. "I hate seein’ ya like this… so please…" He reached his hand out and placed it on Ishimaru’s. "Please get better, baby… I’m so sorry…" Ishimaru didn’t move, and stayed curled up like that for the rest of the night.
"Oy… kyoudai, are you okay?" Mondo didn’t know why he was still trying to speak with Ishimaru at this point. Maybe he just had a tiny hope that he’d acknowledge him at some point. But now he was just confused, what the fuck was going on with him?
"Who is this Ishimaru you all keep talking about?!" Ishimaru shouted. His hair had become white and his eyes seemed to glow. "I’m not Ishimaru! I’m Ishida, got it?!"
Mondo had witnessed Ishimaru talking with alter ego and apologizing for his actions. It broke his heart to see Ishimaru apologizing in a weak voice, blaming himself for everything that happened to Chihiro. What Mondo was not expecting, however, was to see his own face appear on the monitor, telling Ishimaru that it was all right to be sad and that he’d just need to move on sooner or later… It was something he’d say, afterall. The program got him spot on. But… why the hell was Ishimaru acting this way? It was better than him sulking around and withering away into nothing, but…
Mondo followed Ishimaru to his room, and watched as he stared at himself in the mirror. He was talking to himself; something he had never done beforehand.
"Why do they keep mistaking me for Ishimaru?" He asked. "I’m Ishida, not Ishimaru! Ishimaru’s weak!!" He pounded his fist against the wall in frustration. "Weak weak weak weak weak!!!" Mondo couldn’t watch this. Ishimaru was acting like… him. Hating himself so much over his own weakness that he did something crazy. Maybe this was a phase, right? He got a little closure and was recovering… at least, that’s what Mondo hoped.
But he was wrong to hope again.
Ishimaru kept up this strange act and Mondo couldn’t bring him keep watching. It was like watching the bad side of him, the unstable side of him, and it made him sick. He decided to wander around the school and see how the other students were doing. Sakura and Asahina were always together, much like how they were before all of this happened. Naegi tried to befriend everyone but seemed to hang around Kirigiri the most. Hagakure was always off doing his own, strange thing, and Fukawa was always trailing behind Togami. Unless she was Syo, in which case she was chasing him. He decided to visit Celestia last, and was surprised to find Yamada in her room. She always treated him so harshly; why would she let him into her room?
"I-Ishimaru-dono was the one who stole her?!" Yamada asked.
Her, Mondo wondered, who is he talking about?
"No, he forced me to steal Alter Ego." Celestia said, her lip quivering. "H-he did awful things to me… I do not wish to talk about them. He took pictures and said that if I didn’t do as he asked, he would…"
"What the fuck?!" Mondo shouted. Ishimaru would never… he could never do something so awful, even in his weird Ishida stage! How could she say awful shit like that?!
"That bastard!!" Yamada screamed. "Disgusting… absolutely disgusting… I must-"
"Get revenge on him? Of course." Her attitude changed drastically, and she suddenly seemed very eager whilst talking to Yamada. "I have a plan, you know. We could do this and escape together…"
Mondo watched in horror and couldn’t believe what he was listening to. Right before him, Celestia and Yamada were planning out Ishimaru’s death. They were literally planning a murder for a fellow student!! How the fuck could they do that?! He had to find a way to help Ishimaru out. He caused a death but he sure as hell wasn’t going to let another happen!
Just as planned, Ishimaru (or was it Ishida now?) received a note telling him that they had found a way out and he would need to meet them at a certain time.
"Hey, kyoudai!!" Mondo shouted. "Ya can’t believe this, can ya? I thought you were smarter than this!! You’re an honor student, aren’t ya?!" Ishimaru didn’t hear any of his shouts and left his room. Mondo followed desperately behind him, trying to do anything to stop him. "Hey, listen to me!! Go back to your room, okay? This is all bullshit!!" Ishimaru kept walking forward, his gaze directed in front of him. "You’re breakin’ the night time rules, aren’t ya?! Rules are your thing!! Please, stop!! Just think about it or somethin’!!" Ishimaru arrived at the meeting place at the exact time, and looked around curiously. If Mondo was still alive, he knew his heart would be racing and he’d be sweating like hell. Any moment now, Yamada would come out and kill Ishimaru, even though he hadn’t done a god damn thing!! "Kiyotaka, please!! Please listen to me!!" He put his hand on Ishimaru’s chest in one last desperate attempt to get his attention, and he didn’t feel it, as always. "Please… ya gotta run… please!!"
In a moment, Yamada sprang forward, hammer in hand, and struck Ishimaru down before he had the chance to scream.
"NO!!" Mondo shrieked. Blood was dribbling out of Ishimaru’s head. His eyes were wide and fearful and he took quick, staggering breaths. Yamada just chuckled before dropping the hammer on the floor and running away to commence the next part of his and Celestia’s plan. Mondo watched, petrified, as Ishimaru struggled to move, struggled to do escape and live. He rolled onto his stomach and stuck his hand out, and dragged himself a few inches forward. But after that he stopped, and his breathing slowed. "Please… no…" Mondo begged. He reached his hand forward and tried to put it on Ishimaru’s head, to stop the bleeding or something, but nothing happened. He could feel tears forming in his eyes as he watched Ishimaru, the love of his life, take his final breaths. "Kiyotaka…" Ishimaru shut his eyes and it was over.
Mondo found himself in some empty, white space. He didn’t bother wondering where the hell he was or how he got there. All he could think about was Ishimaru’s pale, frightened face as he took his final breaths. It wasn’t fair… it wasn’t fucking fair! How could someone as good-hearted and noble and wonderful as Ishimaru die in such a cruel way?! All his work… all his dreams and plans were for nothing! Celestia and Yamada… those bastards… they better be executed swiftly, Mondo thought. They deserved nothing less than that!
"Mondo…?" That one word pulled him out of his thought. A few feet away stood Ishimaru, who stared at him with wide, confused eyes. Mondo couldn’t believe it. Was Ishimaru actually… looking at him? Could he actually see him now? "M-mondo, is that you?"
"Yeah… yeah, it’s me." Mondo replied nervously. Ishimaru’s eyes welled up with tears and he burst forward and leapt into Mondo’s arms. Mondo held him tightly, and didn’t give a damn that he was soaking his shirt.
"M-mondo!! I’ve missed you so much!!" He sobbed.
"I’ve missed ya too, Kiyotaka." Mondo replied. He squeezed Ishimaru tighter, enjoying the feeling of touching him after so long. "More than ya know. I… I’m so sorry about everything."
"I’m the one who should be sorry, k-kyoudai." Ishimaru said. "I let you die… I should’ve stopped it and I-"
"Don’t say shit like that, okay? Ya couldn’t have done anything." He rubbed Ishimaru’s back soothingly. "It was all my fault, got it? I caused what happened to Chihiro… what happened to you…"
"You couldn’t have done anything." Ishimaru said, shaking his head. "You weren’t there…"
"Yes, I was." Mondo said. He was beginning to tear up too. "I’ve been watchin’ over ya this whole time… and I couldn’t talk or touch or even help ya…"
"You were there? With me?" He pulled away from Mondo and looked at him quizzically. Mondo leaned forward and wiped his tears away gently.
"You were never alone, baby." Mondo said. "I just wish I coulda done somethin’… I wish I coulda protected ya. What kind of soul brother am I?"
"It’s… okay." Ishimaru said. He reached out his hand and grabbed Mondo’s tightly. "You never left me alone."
"Ya won’t have to be alone ever again." Mondo said. He gave Ishimaru’s hand a squeeze and the two of them continued forward into whatever lay ahead.