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Life is a Tough Crowd

Summary:

Archie Andrews wears armour made of sunshine and smiles, but underneath the facade the pressure is growing. It could never last forever.

Notes:

First off, this was written AND posted before I've seen the season finale, so if it doesn't match up with anything..... Then oh well.

Secondly, this isn't a crack fic??? Holy hell.

Thirdly, I'd like to dedicate this to all the wonderful friends I've made in this fandom. Julia, Mitch, Cam, Emily, Billie, Cass, Emily, Brianna, Amy, you guys all make my life so much better and I love you all so much. Hopefully you enjoy this fic as much as I enjoy all y'all companies.

(No I didn't count Emily twice, there are two of them <3)

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

Things were finally settling down in Riverdale. There was no longer a murderer running around town unchecked, people no longer had to be suspicious of their friends and neighbours. Things had changed, yes, but they were settling again.


So why did Archie feel like everything was so much worse?


It didn't make any sense really. So he did his best to just push everything down. Wrote songs, dived into football, bruised his fingers on his punching bag. The problems were over for the most part, he had no reason, no excuse to only be feeling bad now.


Was he a bad person? For so long he'd felt like he was drifting in his own body, why would he only be feeling bad now? Was he only feeling bad because the bad things were over?


Letting out a breath, he shook the thought off as he waved goodbye to Betty, the two of them splitting apart after walking home together. His dad was taking Jughead out to see Mr Jones, so he was alone with just Vegas to hang out with until later that night.


Shutting the door behind himself, the silence around Archie seemed to intensify, pressing in on him. He needed to stop this. Things were fine now. Things were fine now.


Vegas nudged at his legs, and he let out a breath. Petting his dog always helped him calm down, and he easily led the dog upstairs to his bedroom. Throwing down his bag, he sat on the floor and started rubbing his hands over Vegas, who happily flopped down and let himself be pet. Archie spent a good forty minutes there, calming down but still feeling the massive pressure in his chest. That was his normal recently though, so he let Vegas go and got up to see if he could do something about dinner.


As he stood, Archie glanced out the window, saw a blonde woman walking down the street. The panic was instant. He didn't want to see her. He didn't want to go through all of that again. He blinked and suddenly he was downstairs locking the door, and it was so hard to breathe.


Everything was wrong, and he was panicking about everything around him and and and and and standing was a bad idea right now. He just let himself fall where he was, clutching onto his legs because he had no idea what else to do with his hands as they shook. His whole body was shaking, and she was outside she was outside and the thought tore a sob out of his throat.


God, he'd thought everything was over but it was like all the pain he should've been feeling over these last months was only getting to him now. A boy was dead, he'd been used by her, he'd almost lost his best friend because of her, his best friend had been homeless, he couldn't make Betty happy, she made him think he loved her, Mrs Cooper said he wasn't good enough for Betty and was right, she left him, the Blossoms tried to use him, Val broke up with him, his parents were getting divorced, his mum showed up out of no where and wanted him to leave with her, Mr Jones got arrested, he betrayed his best friend again, his best friend tried to run away, he found a dead guy, he watched Mr Blossom murder Jason, and now she was back and outside and he couldn't do this.


He sat there shaking on the floor, sobbing into his knees and clutching onto his legs, willing to crawl out of his skin to escape this hurt, this panic, this dread that just wouldn't ever leave him. He didn't know how to stop her if she did want to come in, he was in no state to try and stop her, and he was just praying that she wouldn't try, that she would just leave him alone.


So when the door started rattling, Archie was frozen. Someone was saying 'no' over and over again, he wanted to move, to hide, but he was so overwhelmed and panicked that he couldn't. He just had to sit there while she came in and hurt him all over again.


"Archie? Archie, kiddo, can you hear me? Can you open your eyes for me please? Archie?"
"Go away, go away, go away, go away."
"Archie, it's Dad, you're safe here, I promise, it's your Dad, and I promise you're safe, buddy."


His dad? It sounded like his dad, didn't sound like her. He took the risk, opening his eyes and glancing up and oh god.
"Daddy-" he choked out, cutting himself off with more sobbing. Strong, warm arms wrapped around him, holding him tight while he sobbed and shook.


"It's going to be okay, Arch. I'm right here, I'm not going to let anyone hurt you again. You're such a good kid, I know it hurts right now, but I promise you it's going to get better." His dad spoke gently, but his voice was firm, like he believed every word.


Slowly, Archie managed to calm down, sore from shaking, exhausted from crying, but the pressure that had been building in his chest was lighter than it had been in a long time. Still there, but lighter. He shifted so he could cling onto his dad's shirt, his face already hidden in the man's neck.
"I'm so-"
"Don't you dare apologise, Archie. You have nothing, nothing to be sorry for."


He just nodded slightly, not believing that but willing to be comforted. His dad started gently wiping his face off, Archie closing his eyes to the feeling.
"Do you think you'd be able to have a shower buddy? It'll make you feel a bit better, less sore. I'll put some pyjamas in the dryer for you so they're warm." Fred murmured, pressing a kiss to his forehead. He nodded, not protesting as his dad helped him stand up.


The hot shower did help Archie feel better, relaxing his tightened, exhausted muscles, washing away the headache that had formed. When he was settled enough to pull himself out of the water and make his way to his bedroom, the state of things took him by surprise.


It was dark outside, the clock on his bedside table reading 19:41. When he'd let Vegas go outside, it had only been twenty past four. Had he really been out of it and panicking on the floor for almost three hours? Well, his dad and Jughead were home, and they were meant to be gone for hours in the first place. Groaning, he sat himself down on his bed, putting his head in his hands. He was so... Tired.


Those warm pyjamas were going cold, though, so he gladly pulled them on, closing his eyes for a few minutes to enjoy the soft warmth before padding downstairs to see if he could help with dinner. It was only fair, he was meant to have had it done by the time the others got home. Jughead stopped him in the doorway of the kitchen, guiding him out with one hand while they other held a cup of tea.
"Jug, I can help with dinner. You guys shouldn't-"
"Archie."


Jughead's voice was sharp, strained in a way that was unfamiliar to Archie, and it made him quiet instantly. Jughead sighed, gripping his shoulder and facing him seriously.
"Arch, if it were anyone else, me, your dad, Kevin, Betty, Veronica, would you be listening to these excuses?"


Archie sighed, his shoulders dropping.
"No." He mumbled honestly, dropping his gaze down to the floor. The difference was, they all had real problems, he was just... Overreacting. He looked up again as a hand touched his cheek, finding Jughead with a soft, fond smile on his lips.
"Then I'm sure as hell not going to listen to them. Come on, the tea's your favourite kind."
"Chai vanilla?"
"Obviously."


Tempted by the sweet tea and sweeter words, Archie caved and let Jughead guide him to the sofa. Curling up on the cushions, it was all too easy to let Jug pull him close to rest against his shoulder, slowly sipping on tea while they listened to the sounds of Fred making dinner in the kitchen. The guilt tugged on him again, and he tapped his finger against the mug for a moment before speaking up.
"Juggie, I... I'm really-"
"I don't wanna hear a word of it, Arch."
"No, Jug."


Archie was insistent, placing his mostly empty mug on the coffee table and pulling away from his friend.
"I shouldn't- you shouldn't have to- my problems aren't real, Jug. I have no reason to be like this, especially when so many others have it so much worse off than me. What right do I have to feel like this?" He questioned, the pressure in his chest burning when-.


"Every right."


Archie looked over at Jughead in surprise, the others hands clenched into fists, eyes red rimmed, voice tight.
"I forgot." Jughead whispered, taking a deep breath before continuing.
"I forgot that you use sunshine as armour. That you're more reckless when hurting. That you ignore your own pain and have such clear, clear signals when you're doing so. I forgot, or maybe I even ignored them, which is worse. Arch, you have just as much reason to be hurting as any of us. Your problems are real, as real as mine, or Cheryl's, or Veronica's, or anyone else's. Please don't think your problems are worth less, that you're worth less than any of us. Because you're not."


Archie had tears in his eyes again, a few of them leaking down his face. A hand tugged at his shoulder, and he went with it easily, leaning on Jughead's chest as their arms wrapped around each other. The sofa dipped as Fred joined them, his warm hand carding through Archie's hair for a few moments.
"I know you might not want to, but could you try and eat something for me, kiddo?" Fred asked quietly, smiling softly as Archie shifted back.


They set up on the sofa together for dinner, a blanket shared between them, bowls of Archie's favourite pasta in their laps, and his favourite childhood movie playing on the TV.
"I thought you swore you would never ever watch this again." Archie remarked, managing a faint smile as the menu for Monsters Inc popped up. His dad sighed as he pressed play on the remote, absently stabbing a piece of ravioli.
"I did, but I think I can make an exception."


Halfway through his food, Archie slowed, now just mixing the pasta through the sauce until he could find his way to voice what he wanted.
"I thought I saw her." He murmured, eyes glued to the screen where Boo was running rampage through a restaurant.
"Jennifer."


He felt both Jughead and Fred stiffen beside him, and for the third time that night his eyes filled with tears.
"I'm- I'm sorry, I was being stupid again." He whispered, suddenly finding himself in his dad's embrace.


"You're not stupid, Archie. This isn't your fault. That woman violated you, manipulated you. It's okay to not be okay after that. You aren't weak or stupid for being hurt. You're such a good kid, and I'm sorry I didn't know how much this was eating at you. But I'm going to be here for you, I've always been here for you and I always will be. You're so, so brave, kiddo. I'm so proud and I love you so much." Fred said firmly, holding Archie close. Jughead slid over to wrap his arms around the boy too, Archie snuggled between the two of them.


Archie hadn't felt this safe in a long time. He knew there was a long way to go before he'd be actually okay again, but this was a good start.


That's how Archie fell asleep, safe, loved and warm between the two people he loved most on their old sofa while his favourite movie played. It was the best rest he'd had in months.

Notes:

If you'd like to scream at me you can find me on tumblr @autisticarchieandrews