Chapter Text
Hyungwon doesn’t fancy sleeping in the studio anymore. No matter how late he is when he finishes his practice, he always comes home every night. Most of the time, he finds Minhyuk waiting for him while humming the Christmas songs and Hyungwon swears his sprint through the night is worth it. At other times, Hyungwon comes home to an empty apartment and he feels... something. Not quite disappointed, but similar to it.
Sometimes, the apartment stays empty for a day or two. At other—harder—times, it stays empty for a week or two.
Hyungwon never complaints, though, because, in the end, Minhyuk always comes home. He has made Minhyuk wait once, now it’s just his turn to do the waiting. It’s not an easy task, he realizes, but he keeps on waiting, knowing that Minhyuk wouldn’t really leave him without saying.
At least, not until Christmas.
Christmas.
The fucking Christmas.
Hyungwon swears he has been trying to forget everything, including the Christmas thing Minhyuk said that weird night, but he couldn’t. Realizing that Minhyuk means something to him has broken a wall that he doesn’t know how to repair it. His defense is crumbling. He starts to register more things—all the things that the past Hyungwon would ignore with ease—and want something that he shouldn’t.
Hyungwon never voices it out, though, because Minhyuk never demands anything from him and it doesn’t feel right to ask something when he couldn’t give anything. But then, finally Minhyuk wanted something and Hyungwon just couldn’t let this slip.
“You see,” Minhyuk says while fixing his head on Hyungwon’s lap, “You practice so hard but I’ve never seen you dance.”
Hyungwon twitches. After his last big performance, he has been dodging any chance to perform because he doesn’t want to be committed to the late night practices. He wants to be home. He wants to be with Minhyuk. If Minhyuk wants to see him dance, though, then it’s another story.
“There’s an upcoming performance,” Hyungwon starts, careful and unsure. An idea is emerging in his head and suddenly his heart is beating fast. “A big one. I’ve been offered to take part.”
Minhyuk hums, showing that he’s listening even though his eyes are closing. Minhyuk sleeps a lot these days and Hyungwon likes it when Minhyuk sleeps so close to him.
“The practice will be intense. I might need to stay in the studio for a long time again, like last time,” Hyungwon continues. His fingers are shifting through Minhyuk’s hair and Hyungwon doesn’t know if it calms him or Minhyuk more.
Minhyuk opens his eyes a bit, frowning.
“But it would be bigger than my last performance. It would be my best stage so far. I’ve said no to it, though, but if you want to see me dance, I might still be able to do something about it,” Hyungwon offers, gazing down on Minhyuk with hopeful eyes. He wants this.
Minhyuk gives it a thought. He turns and snuggles to Hyungwon’s stomach while smiling. “Do it, Hyungwonnie,” he says. Then, he adds in a lower voice, “I’m going to be... away more frequently anyway.”
Hyungwon exhales a long breath and runs his fingers on Minhyuk’s cheek. “But you have to promise me you’d come.”
“Of course,” Minhyuk says without missing a beat.
Hyungwon bites on his lips before dropping the bomb, “It’s a Christmas performance.”
The room falls silent safe from the never ending Christmas carols and Minhyuk sits up, scooting away from Hyungwon.
“You know I’m going home this Christmas,” Minhyuk whispers. He is looking down and his expression is hard.
“It’s just an hour— It’s just— At least—,” Hyungwon tries to talk but he couldn’t. He closes his eyes and arranges his breath. He doesn’t even know what he is after. Minhyuk did say he would be going home this Christmas and there’s an unspoken agreement that it’s not something to negotiate about, but Hyungwon thinks that maybe, just maybe, Minhyuk could push it until Christmas is really there then maybe, just maybe, he wouldn’t need to go home at all. Christmas has been something that Hyungwon dreads these past few weeks. He has been counting down the days and thinking that Minhyuk might still be there when the counter reaches zero gives Hyungwon a vague hope that maybe Minhyuk could stay beyond that. “Just promise me to try, okay? Just try. I’ll be there waiting for you.”
Minhyuk keeps quiet for a good moment. His expression is a mixture of pain and sadness. Then, he scoots back to Hyungwon and rests his head on Hyungwon’s lap again, burying his face on Hyungwon’s belly. “Promise me it will be your best performance,” he mumbles in an exhale.
“I promise,” Hyungwon says before ducking down to plant a kiss on Minhyuk’s temple.
(Hyungwon doesn’t sleep that night. Minhyuk does, though, and Hyungwon watches him. Hyungwon watches the rise and fall of Minhyuk’s chest. He watches the little twitches that Minhyuk does. Hyungwon starts to wish he will never need to sleep again.)