Chapter Text
Next morning, bright and early, found both Barry and Cisco pushing themselves around in the rolly chairs. They both pushed off a desk and rolled in the hallway.
"Barry! Barry, try pushing off at superspeed!" Cisco goaded.
"Somehow this seems like a horrible idea." Barry mumbled as he slowly stopped spinning.
"For science!!" Cisco exclaimed loudly.
Barry shrugged and uncrossed his legs. He then proceeded to push off the ground at super speed. The chair immediately shot across the long hallway and Barry yelped and held onto the back of the chair in a death grip. When he finally stopped he was a good ways away.
"Duuuuuude," He heard Cisco say from down the hallway. "You literally burned rubber!" The Latino's sentence was punctuated with the sound of wheels squeaking their way down the hallway.
"It certainly smells like it," Barry mumbled.
"The... wheels are melted, dude. Like totally gone. You're balancing on a stump." Cisco said, eyes wide and focused below Barry.
Now that Barry was paying attention the chair did feel awfully lopsided. He got off and looked.
"They wheels are gone." He said.
"You were on a roll there, Barry, a serious grind." Cisco
"You're treading a fine line here." Barry shot back.
"As long as we don't rim, dude. No homo."
"That feel a bit flat."
"Spoke too soon I guess."
"I'm tire-d of this."
Cisco and Barry started at each other until Cisco dissolved into peals of laughter. Barry just put his face in his hands and groaned.
"I hate us." Barry said.
"I think you mispronounced the word 'love'. All in all it's been a GoodYear."
"Mostly because I was comatose for most of it." Barry allowed and shook his head. "Really, that could have ended up a lot worse," he indicated the half melted chair and then the wall that was a couple of feet ahead of it.
"We...should get rid of your tire tracks before Wells comes in and sees."
"Is that a 'you' we or a us we."
"You."
Barry gave Cisco a flat look, "Your idea, you get to help clean this up."
Cisco heaved a sigh. He then planted his feet shoulder width apart, puffed out his chest, held up a finger and said, "To the janitorial closet!" In his most heroic voice.
Barry rolled his eyes and pushed Cisco forwards, muttering a fond, "Dork," to him.
-x-
SAVED BY THE FLASH
News Flash: Recent Goings and New Heroes
“'Weather Wizard' detained for indecent exposure. For the full story, turn to page 7."
A couple of weeks ago I set up a submissions box and haven't got a lot of traffic on it until now. The first I was able to confirm was a clerk at a local boutique that had the Flash as their customer (more on page 3).
Another was a group of teens who were in the local Sheets-N-Things, saw Flash crash through a window and onto a matress right in front of them (more on the interaction on page 3).
There were also an overwhelming submissions of the Rogues doing ‘nice’ every day community helping things. Earlier this week was Captain Cold putting out a fire and helping Flash with a demolished building Just yesterday was Heatwave, helping an elderly woman to her car and thwarting Weather Wizard’s plan (still unknown) before the Flash could get there! Wonders never cease.
Is Central gaining new heroes? This is the second heroic stunt in as many days from the Rogues' Gallery. Tune in next time!
(Show 43 comments)
Len turns to his sister and Mick, "It looks like we're making a bad name for ourselves."
“Or you could take the good press as the blessing it is, to keep the heat off of you all.” Hartley proposed, elbow deep in the hood of a modified race car Lisa had stolen two weeks previous.
Lisa snickered, leaning on the side of the car, watching Hartley work, “You think they’d do the sensible thing, Hart?”
"We're gonna plan a heist, Boss?" Mick asked, resigned.
"Already planned." Len enthused loudly.
"That'a boy." Lisa cooed. Len shot her an unimpressed look.
"There's a…
bird
artefact that a fence from Gotham is willing to pay quite a bit for." Len explained.
"Cobblepot again?" Mick asked.
"Most likely. I wonder why he thinks he's so slick. He's plainly obvious," Lisa said, and pulled up the email correspondence between the buyer and Len, "This alias is the most obvious damn thing."
"I think this is more than likely to make up for the botched thievery on Starling." Hartley’s voice echoed in the hood, along with an ‘aha!’ and a loud clunk that Len studiously ignored. (He tried not to get involved with whatever scheme his sister and the Piper got themselves into. Too much drama, even for him.)
"That was him?" Mick grumbled lowly, "I thought that was some amateur."
"The only reason he got away with it at all is because SPD's junior detectives contaminated the crime scene so much and Cobblepot was recognised schmoozing in some high class bar." Len regaled.
"So we're stealing it because Cobblepot wants it?" That was Lisa.
"Cobblepot is the one who pulled the strings with his business friends to get it stationed in Central City." And that was Harley. Len was going to miss the man’s penchant for information when he got accepted into going into one of those technological giant corporations he had been applying to recently.
"As opposed to Gotham?" Mick questioned, flopping onto the ratty couch in the middle of warehouse they were occupying at the moment.
"Exactly. I suppose he thinks it'll be easier to steal it from here. He's had opposition from Gotham's silent Zorro crusader." Len replied.
"Not to mention Catwoman, master thief in a leather catsuit?" Lisa asked, batting her eyes. "She's someone to be admired for sure, brother mine."
Len huffed. "Master thief indeed. She leaves enough evidence for a small child to pick up clues."
"So about like GPD, then." Mick retorted. Lisa snorted.
“Oh please, Lenny, you’re just jealous she hasn’t gotten caught yet and her secret identity is still in tact.” Lisa teased, “She’s a better thief.”
Len rolled his eyes, not dignifying Lisa’s teasing claim with a response.
“You just think she’s more attractive to look at,” Hartley poked at Lisa, leaning out of the car hood and wiping his hands on a grease towel she handed him. “It’s not a bad bonus, that’s for sure. I’d teach her so many things…” Lisa sighed dreamily.
Len was definitely going to ignore that. He made his way over to the file cabinet in the corner of the room and pulled out a couple of rubber banded rolled up tubes.
"Officially, the exhibit will be open in three days from now. To make things fun, let's take it opening night. Bait and switch." Len proposed.
"Bait and switch? Wouldn't we need a replica?" Lisa squinted at her brother. They definitely didn’t have time to get a good replica made.
"I'm so glad you said something, sis," Len commented tone jovial, with a glint in his eye.
Mick looked on, amused, as his partner got into planning.
"We're certain that Penguin has his sights set on this statue. Which means he already has a replica made. We steal his replica and switch it for the real thing."
Lisa tapped on her jaw, "Do you want to get a cheap dupe made for his replica? It’d piss him off."
"That just might work," Len murmured, “Contact whoever he had make the first replica and have them make a second, shitter one for shits and giggles. Of course, we reach out as Ol’ Cobblepot so we aren’t implicated. We switch the replica for the real thing and Cobblepot switches the better replica for the shitty replica.”
"So basically,” Lisa started, “We steal his first replica, switch it out with ours, go to the museum and switch the real with the replica, and when he goes to steal the replica and replace it with the shit dupe, we get him caught by the Flash. We make sure Penguin doesn't get too close of a look and no one will be the wiser to the new statue being an imitation until well after we get cash back from a sale." She summarised.
“Exactly,” Len nodded, a satisfied smirk on his lips.
"Ooo," Lisa clapped her hands, "Do I get to go undercover again, Lenny? I could call the police when he walks in the museum, pose as a museum guard. How do you think I'd look as a redhead?" She asked with a smirk.
"I'm sure you'd look lovely, Lise. That's not half bad...let's get on it, then. Get you a job now so you seem like a regular instead of a red flag."
“Why not steal the real thing from him after he does it? Steal it from the fence he sold it to? Why interact with Cobblepot at all?” Harley asked, exasperated.
“We have to get our kicks in somewhere, honey.” Lisa crooned, and Harley rolled his eyes in response.
“You guys are way over-complicating this. I’m out, I have an interview at Kord Industries tomorrow morning and I plan to blow them out of the water.” Hartley informed, "In the meantime, I'm on my way to STAR Labs to get my portfolio and transcript so I can transfer. Ciao."
-x-
"And I raaaaan I ran so far awaaayy!!" Cisco's voice belted through the ear piece.
Barry grimaced. "Are you doing this just to make fun of me?" He mumbled, very much noticing how Cisco cut through the intro of the song he was playing to get to the relevant chorus.
"Whaat? Man, no." Cisco said. There was quick tapping and the audio stopped.
Barry sighed in relief and doubled back around the block and to double check some problem areas and to change directions to patrol the shopping district next.
Suddenly Michael Jackson's Speed Demon was blaring through one side of his comm link, with Cisco singing enthusiastically along. Barry laughed in spite of himself.
"Hey, I have songs for different occasions, too! Like theme songs."
"Hmm?" Barry hummed, more focused on not impeding drivers on the road while running around them. He had gotten a lot better at not displacing things around him when then were moving different--but less human--speeds. He'd think about the particular physics later. He was just thankful that he didn't have to listen to someone screaming with road rage next to him. It was a weird first couple of weeks. (Especially when Eddie pulled him over and wrote him a ticket for speeding.)
'Fire and ice/ You come on like a flame/ Then you turn a cold shoulder...'
"Cisco...really?" Barry asked, having tuned back into his comm link.
"Hold on hold on--that's not even the best part of this song wait..." the music stopped.
"Wait, no, actually the rest of the song just repeats...I'll find a better one for when you run into those two again," Cisco's voice cut out and Barry rolled his eyes fondly.
'Rising like a spire/ In the burning heart/ The unmistakable fire'
"Cisco, are you just using the word 'fire' as a keyword? I'm pretty sure this doesn't have anything to do with actual fire."
"Maaaaybe! Hold on. I'm--wait--I'll find a better song."
"Cisco, please don't--"
'I'm hot/ You're cold/ you go around/ like you know/ who I am'
"Cisco!"
The sound of Cisco laughing and the song fast forwarding hit his ears and then,
'I'm slippin into the lava/ and I'm trying keep from going under/ I'm burning up/ burning up you baby'
Barry just groaned.
"Ohh, you're in luck! Looks like more Gotham movement--Hartley? Sorry buddy, gotta go." And Cisco turned his mic off. Of course he did.
Barry let out a huff and made to change his path towards STAR Labs. He really didn't want to deal with the mess that Hartley and Cisco getting into a pissing contest would entail.
-x-
"Don't bother with going after Penguin, the Rogues are planning to take care of him," Hartley waved off, "Anyway, I need my portfolios and whatever else I signed on."
"Wait wait wait, back up to where you said--" Hartley cut Cisco off, "I know about Flash's deal with Snart. The bird statue has literally zero value to this city, and the only value the thing really has is to creepy birdwatchers and the off chance someone melts the gold down into something else. Just let them get this one. And that way, Penguin takes the fall and CCPD catches him and gets him out of this city and back into Gotham where he belongs."
"So, I'm guessing you aren't fond of Gotham's elite?" Barry asked next to Cisco, making the man jump. Hartley gave him a bemused look. "Absolutely not. Penguin is a douchebag. And Sophia Star is in town. I'm tired of all of the slimey rich Gothamites coming here."
"Tell us how you really feel, dude." Cisco raised his eyebrow.
"Pamela Ivy is an ecoterrorist, Selina Kyle is way too invested in animals and Wayne, Bruce Wayne is fake as fuck but at least he's progressive despite being an airhead, and the Drakes are pretentious assholes. Their kid is pretty cool, but the poor thing is obviously neglected and no one says anything because they're afraid of Jack and Janet. I could go on, but I'd rather not. In short, Gotham Elite is a sad selfish lot, beaten only by Starling's Elite and my own fucking parents." Hartley regaled to Cisco, who only just noticed Barry was gone.
And then Barry was back, setting down a crate on the desk closest to Hartley, "Here's all the physical copies of things with your name on them, your blueprints, the harddrive of the computer you used, and I'm sure Cisco would be glad to give you whatever is on digital file that's yours." Hartley gave a barely-there smile to the speedster. "Did I miss something?" Barry asked, looking between Cisco and Hartley. Hartley shook his head.
"Dude, you can't do that! Wells will be so pissed, and that's Star Labs property!" Cisco hissed out.
"Oh, what's Wells gonna do? Fire me?" Barry rolled his eyes, "Besides, I looked into the records. There's literally no reason Hartley should have been fired in the first place. There was foul play."
"How do you know that? And besides, didn't his little display at his parents building show that he--" Cisco continued ranting while Hartley thumbed through the files in the box Barry brought.
"You seem to forget that I'm literally a criminal investigator? I'm not dumb, I don't--" Barry started ranting back.
"Okay, you two, you're both the prettiest." Hartley cut them both off, turning to Cisco, "Look, I get you don't like me, Francisco."
"That's right! I don't like you!" Cisco burst out, ready to keep going but Hartley cut him off again.
"Fun, I don't like you either. Now we could keep arguing like children or get over this complete bullshit. Wells is using you, both of you, and the only reason we don't like each other Cisco is because he purposely pit us against one another. He's going to use you until he's lost interest and then he's going to let you take the fall and boot you on your ass like he did to me. Wake up, it's not all about you or any bad water between us." Hartley looked between Barry and Cisco, eyes intense.
"Cisco," Barry started, "Didn't you say how you were getting odd vibes from Wells these days?" He reminded quitely.
"What are you saying? That Hartley is right?" Cisco huffed, indignant, having found his voice after Hartley's speech.
"I'm saying is maybe we should be a bit careful about who we trust." Barry amended, having changed into his street clothes and was in the process of hanging the Flash uniform back on the mannequin.
"Rich, coming from you." Cisco retorted. Barry just narrowed his eyes at Cisco, and hoisted up Hartley's box.
"Cisco will find your things, Hartley, and if he doesn't I will. Let's get this out of here before Wells comes back." Barry said, walking out of the cortex.
"What just happened?" Cisco asked, leaning back, dumbfounded. Hartley rolled his eyes, "While I'm sure you meant it as a slight about him and Snart being friends, I'm sure he took it as a pointed comment about his father. A great best friend you are."
"Wha--dude! I didn't mean it like that," Cisco groaned.
"Don't call me dude." Hartley waved off, "And I'm sure you two will be fine." The blond made a move to pat Cisco's arm, and Cisco followed the motion closely before Hartley huffed and dropped his arm back to his side. "I'm going to fill Barry in with the Gotham vs Central Rogues debacle, au revoir."
"Wait! Why are you helping us?" Cisco asked, standing up.
"I said I didn't like you, not that I hated you. And maybe I just want to get one back up on Wells. Or maybe I actually care about you and your band of merry losers. Who knows? Just be grateful I didn't go through with my full plan." Was Hartley's parting words before Cisco was left alone in the cortex.
Things were much simpler this morning, Cisco thought, looking at the ruined wheely chair leaning on the filing cabinets.