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“Is it a headache?”
“Yeah.” Eddie mumbles, burying his head into Buck’s chest.
“How long’s it been hurting?”
“Not long.” Eddie whispers, wishing everything would just stop.
“Really?” Buck asks, unconvinced.
Or
Eddie’s fought in wars and survived being shot. He’s pretty sure he can survive a little headache.
Bookmarked by merlinreader99
08 Jan 2025
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if i need to rearrange my particles — i will for you. by dylaesthetics
Fandoms: 9-1-1 (TV)
17 Mar 2024
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“What’s this?” asks Buck, picking up a pamphlet from the loft’s kitchen counter.
“I’m pretty sure you can read, Buck,” answers Chim, popping his gum. Usually, Buck wouldn’t be irritated by that, but Chim’s the interim captain due to Bobby’s cruise, and everything gets on his nerves.
“I can read,” Buck huffs. “I’m just confused. How does this work?”
He looks down at the pamphlet again. The deep red letters that say, are you a first responder looking for a buddy who understands your woes? — Fireapp’s got you covered!
_____
OR Buck joins a support app for first responders and matches with a firefighter who has PTSD and a kid who likes giraffes, apparently.
— NOW WITH AN ADDED EPILOGUE —
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 45,178
- Chapters:
- 12/12
- Collections:
- 3
- Comments:
- 571
- Kudos:
- 3,076
- Bookmarks:
- 850
- Hits:
- 51,915
Bookmarked by merlinreader99
05 Jan 2025
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“Hey Eds,” Buck whispered, his voice rough from being recently intubated.
“I thought you promised not to do that again?” His friend’s voice was thick.
“I know. I’m sorry.” Buck made the mistake of clearing his throat. A sharp stabbing pain in his side shocked him when he tightened his abs to cough. It subsided quickly and only the previous throbbing aching pain was left, but for a second, Buck had grabbed the hand holding his tightly—Eddie’s hand.
•••••
A very slow burn fic chronicling the progress of Buck and Eddie's relationship, Buck's parenting journey, and Eddie learning to accept himself, in which Buck gets injured in an accident and he moves in with Eddie and Christopher.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 110,026
- Chapters:
- 38/38
- Collections:
- 2
- Comments:
- 716
- Kudos:
- 1,628
- Bookmarks:
- 575
- Hits:
- 53,800
Bookmarked by merlinreader99
03 Jan 2025
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Missing Chris is less of an emotion these days and more of a physical entity. He’s sure everyone can see that he’s slowly hollowing himself out, that he can’t do much of anything else.
But when Jee laughs at him trying to get his tongue to touch his nose, and Mara loops one of her arms through his to keep him from tossing the rest of his cup in the garbage, Eddie feels solid again.
Maybe he likes yellow birthday cake ice cream after all.
(or, gerrard messes with the team's schedules and eddie 'i just drove my son to flee the state' diaz is the only option to watch mara and jee-yun after school on tuesdays, which, shouldn't be a problem at all, right?)
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Summary
It was an accident. He slipped. That doesn't mean he isn't going to take advantage of the opportunity that presents itself.
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Post Lawsuit, Buck accidentally cuts his arm. He decides that maybe not getting help is best for everyone.---
TW for suicidal idealization and injury that turns into a suicide attempt.- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 36,091
- Chapters:
- 14/14
- Collections:
- 5
- Comments:
- 452
- Kudos:
- 7,971
- Bookmarks:
- 1,745
- Hits:
- 202,958
Bookmarked by merlinreader99
27 Dec 2024
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Eddie shrugs. “Christopher mentioned to Daniel that Buck and I are partners. I mean, sure, it’s a little weird that she invited him over as well, but—”
“Partners,” Hen interrupts, “like work partners?”
Eddie and Buck glance at each other. “Uh, yeah?” Eddie says. “What other type of partner?”
Hen stares at them for a moment, before she bursts out laughing. “You dumbasses. She thinks you’re together.”
or, Eddie joins the PTA.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 11,958
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 2
- Comments:
- 298
- Kudos:
- 10,113
- Bookmarks:
- 2,603
- Hits:
- 71,044
Bookmarked by merlinreader99
27 Dec 2024
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Dean is fragile—like the silence that has made home in his throat. Sometimes, in the dead of the night, when it’s just him and his cold, dark and empty room, Dean would reach up and feel his own face—a baseless need to make sure he hasn’t turned into mist or whatever. It’s not that Dean’s lost his voice or anything—he can feel it down in his throat, though it’s rattling in his chest, stuck and unmoving. Every time he tries to speak, the weight of each word presses down on his chest until he feels his ribs ache, like he’s having compressions done on him and his bones are starting to cave under the pressure. There’s something vaguely familiar about this feeling—an urge to make himself as small as he can until he sinks into the walls. Everything around him feels out of place, and a size bigger—the bunker, his room, his own skin—with too many empty spaces like an ill-fitting suit. He could pull a few words out of his throat if he pushes hard enough, but Dean’s so goddamn exhausted.
But, even when he feels like a shadow of who he used to be, Cas is still the one thing that makes him feel more alive than his own burdened beating heart.
***
After Michael, Dean stops talking.
Bookmarked by merlinreader99
17 Dec 2024
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Summary
It’s not like Buck needs anyone to tell him what his issues are. They might as well be written on his forehead in bright red marker. He’s not ignoring it or anything; Buck just doesn’t see the point in re-litigating them every time he feels like this, every time he feels like a dog that got sent back to the pound. It’s not like he doesn’t have his friends and family, and Tommy is sleeping right next to him, but there’s a hole in Buck’s chest he’s had since he was born and he still doesn’t know how to fill it.
When the 118 is closed for reconstruction after an earthquake, Buck is a floater for different stations around the city. He tries not to let it get to him. Much.
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“You could touch me?” Buck says, his smile is crooked and charming but a little nervous too. He pushes his face further into the cushions like he’s trying to slip through and hide beneath the fabric. Eddie has never wanted to touch someone more, and Buck is even offering, but it feels forbidden to act on it, like he’s on some prank show where the presenter will jump out and laugh at Eddie for ever thinking he could have something he wanted without shame and that sick feeling in his stomach following behind.
But Buck persists, shifting closer, “If you want, you could, wh-whenever you want, I’d like it.”
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Or
Five times Buck and Eddie touch platonically plus one time they realise it's not platonic at all.
Bookmarked by merlinreader99
01 Dec 2024
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taking my time but i don’t know where by cosmicocean
Fandoms: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Marvel
20 May 2024
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Summary
“The fuck are you supposed to be?” Barnes asks. “Red and Blue Boy?”
“I’m Spiderman.” The kid sounds like he’s frowning.
“Fuck you are. You’re like twelve.”
“I am not,” he protests, voice cracking. He winces.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 35,443
- Chapters:
- 29/29
- Comments:
- 345
- Kudos:
- 1,589
- Bookmarks:
- 400
- Hits:
- 18,486
Bookmarked by merlinreader99
29 Nov 2024
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Summary
The birthmark is technically an imperfection. Buck is full of those but this one is visible and prominent; having it ignored or ridiculed hurts in the same way. The only thing he wants—the only thing he’s ever wanted—is for someone to see his imperfections, acknowledge them, and love him, anyway.
It’s stupid, it’s so fucking stupid, but that’s how it feels when Eddie’s lips press into his birthmark and then he smiles at Buck just as fondly as he did before. It feels like Eddie is seeing him, all of him. Acknowledging those imperfections and loving him, anyway.
--
OR: 5 times Eddie kisses Buck's birthmark & 1 time he doesn't.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 10,726
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Comments:
- 185
- Kudos:
- 2,176
- Bookmarks:
- 685
- Hits:
- 14,332
Bookmarked by merlinreader99
27 Nov 2024
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Summary
The team discover an Instagram account based on what the public has overheard from their calls. Hen and Chim become amateur detectives in their quest to uncover the the context of every quote, but this becomes difficult when it's increasingly clear they've been left in the dark about something.
Based on the account @Overheard_LA and me deciding with all the insane things that the 118 say on calls, someone should be recording them for posterity.
EDIT: This fic is now a MULTI_MEDIA FIC!!! I recommend if you've already read to just scroll through and look at the masterpiece fake Instagram screenshots. It is screen reader accessible.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 8,753
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Comments:
- 581
- Kudos:
- 12,881
- Bookmarks:
- 2,613
- Hits:
- 80,154
Bookmarked by merlinreader99
24 Nov 2024
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Summary
buck and eddie stumble into the most loving relationship known to mankind by acting like a couple for four years until they realize they might as well just be in love
aka buck and eddie are affectionate bastards who redefine every step of falling in love so extremely that their family has no fucking idea what's going on at any time
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- Words:
- 116,618
- Works:
- 20
- Bookmarks:
- 94
Bookmarked by merlinreader99
14 Nov 2024
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Summary
Buck flails and tries to sit up. “Eddie,” he gasps. “No, no, no, no. I need to go. I need to find him. I need—” He struggles, tries to squirm out of Eddie’s grip, and he growls, “Let me go. I need to find Christopher.”
“You back with us?” Hen asks, joining them on Buck’s other side and helping Eddie hold him down.
“What? No, let me go!” he says, struggling against Hen’s efforts to keep him still. His eyes grow hot with tears and he tries to dive over the side of the rescue boat, calling weakly for Christopher.
Eddie tackles him, his own eyes wet, and it’s looking into those sad brown eyes that finally brings Buck fully back to himself.“Stop. Where’s Christopher?”
“I don’t know,” Buck wails. “I’m so sorry. I—” He twists, tries to fight Eddie so he might jump back into the water, but the body atop him is heavy and he’s so, so tired.
“Buck,” Eddie says, tears sliding down his face and dripping onto Buck’s soaked shirt. “Buck, stop. I’m not losing you too.”
Buck slumps, letting his eyes flutter closed and giving in to the warm weight of Eddie’s body holding him down. “I’m already lost,” he mumbles into the darkness as he finally, finally goes to sleep.Bookmarked by merlinreader99
04 Nov 2024
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Summary
Buck was sitting somewhere dark. Or maybe his eyes were closed. He couldn’t tell. Was he floating? He couldn’t feel his face. He couldn’t feel anything.
Buck struggles after they get back from a bad call.Day 24: catatonic
BTHB: dissociationSeries
- Part 16 of whumptober 2022
- Part 6 of bad things happen bingo
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 1,236
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 2
- Comments:
- 15
- Kudos:
- 378
- Bookmarks:
- 49
- Hits:
- 4,122
Bookmarked by merlinreader99
28 Oct 2024
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Christopher Diaz has two dads. He's had two dads for almost as long as he can remember. The only problem? His dads haven’t quite worked that out for themselves… yet.
or
Five times Christopher calls Buck his dad to other people, and the one time he finally gets to say it to Buck.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 14,769
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 153
- Kudos:
- 2,639
- Bookmarks:
- 673
- Hits:
- 17,324
Bookmarked by merlinreader99
15 Oct 2024
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Summary
Buck doesn’t think that if he were to say, “I’m in a bad place”, that anyone would turn him away. Really, he doesn’t. The 118 has too many good, kind people for that.
But every time he wants to open his mouth, to say something, to reach out to Eddie or Bobby or Hen or Chim, he hears Eddie yelling, “you’re exhausting.”
—you’re exhausting, you’re exhausting, you’re exhausting—
So each day he does his job and he laughs and he jokes and he pretends he’s the care-free goofball he’s always been. And each day he packs away his bruises and his worries, takes them home to his empty loft with its quiet rooms, and licks his wounds in silence.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 11,163
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Comments:
- 729
- Kudos:
- 21,091
- Bookmarks:
- 5,635
- Hits:
- 229,956
Bookmarked by merlinreader99
15 Oct 2024
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Summary
“Didn’t know you were seeing someone.”
Buck just laughs. Like, honest to god giggles. Eddie is stuck fighting off doubly massive waves of butterflies and confusion, all while Buck just gazes down at him.
“That’s cute,” he hears Buck mumble, just before climbing into the truck, calling Eddie after him.
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or, everyone knows eddie is dating buck except for eddie, literally.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 27,258
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 4
- Comments:
- 488
- Kudos:
- 14,282
- Bookmarks:
- 3,656
- Hits:
- 156,320
Bookmarked by merlinreader99
14 Oct 2024
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Summary
What good is a soldier without a war to fight?
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Dean, adrift without Cas in a world that doesn't remember ending and desperately refusing to believe in the hope Jack offers, stumbles out of hunting and into a life he's absolutely not equipped for -- except for how it might just be the one thing that can keep him together.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 50,780
- Chapters:
- 7/7
- Collections:
- 2
- Comments:
- 317
- Kudos:
- 1,808
- Bookmarks:
- 703
- Hits:
- 21,372
Bookmarked by merlinreader99
13 Oct 2024
Bookmarker's Notes
girl what the fuck I wanted this to go on forever, gorgeous . cried some real tears in here and smiled some real smiles.