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Summary
Stede is so hesitant now.
He wouldn’t say afraid, not exactly, because he could never be afraid of Ed. But he is afraid of himself. Of his own feelings. Of inadvertently hurting Ed again.
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Aziraphale says it and it is… easy. The words have been clogged in his throat for millennia now, fear and worry and doubt forever stopping them from escaping. So it makes sense that saying them feels like the first full breath of fresh air he’s taken since… well, since his First Breath. In the Garden.
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Though the engine wasn’t running, the Bentley seemed to hum anyway, a comforting and familiar energy that soothed Aziraphale’s tired nerves. Outside the rain pattered on the car windows and the lights and traffic of Soho seemed hazy and far away. Ensconced here with Crowley, Aziraphale felt safer than he had since the moment Gabriel appeared naked on his doorstep.
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Edward would blame it on the desk.
Stede kept running his hands over the damn thing, though, caressing and practically cooing over it, all of his attention and focus caught, and only smiled sheepishly when Ed, doing his best to ignore how he felt vaguely put out, asked if he’d like a moment alone with it.
Yeah, alright, maybe Ed was a little bit jealous of the stupid fucking desk.
Day 26 of OFMD Kinktober: Desk sex/Whimpering/“I’ve got you. Let go.”
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Stede sighs, and for the first time he looks as tired as Ed. As everyone does nowadays. Holding themselves together by whatever means necessary. “It can’t all be about survival, can it?”
It hits Ed with all the force of something he’d thought lost to him forever: the idea that there could be more. He’d stopped thinking in terms beyond eating, sleeping and breathing. Sure, he, Izzy, Fang and Ivan have been looking for something, searching for someplace safe, but that place has been growing more and more abstract as time goes on. The more it becomes clearer and clearer that nowhere is safe anymore.
Ed stopped wanting for anything beyond putting one foot in front of the other because he figured the only safety lay in having nothing to lose.
“We have to have something to live for, don’t we?” Stede is saying, and challenges the entire worldview Ed has been depending on since the world ended.
Recent series
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You Had Your Soul With You by kataurah
Fandom: His Dark Materials - Philip Pullman, Miss Fisher's Murder Mysteries
11 Feb 2022
- Words:
- 5,446
- Works:
- 2
- Bookmarks:
- 5
Recent bookmarks
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Summary
Guillermo and Nandor christen their underground lair with a kiss.
Bookmarked by kataurah
18 Dec 2024
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April Brought a Kind of Madness by nonphenomenaut
Fandoms: The X-Files, LOVECRAFT H. P. - Works
08 Nov 2020
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Summary
Mulder and Scully travel to Massachusetts, where something sinister has fallen in the western woods and it's not doing the locals or our Agents any favors.
Series
- Part 1 of Trapped in Massachusetts
Bookmarked by kataurah
18 Dec 2024
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Summary
“Move,” Mulder orders, his voice low and gravelly, wrapping a large hand around Scully's bicep and pulling her aside.
She struggles against him, mentally reviewing the profile, desperate to think of a way to stop this. The other victims hadn’t been violent for violence’s sake. Reduced to their basic instincts, they had fallen back to protect what they had considered theirs.
She needs to get Mulder out. And as much as she hates appearing weak, she knows exactly how to do it. She knows exactly what Mulder considers his.
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aka the one where mulder is drugged and reduced to his basic instincts, and no one needs three guesses to figure out who those instincts get directed towards
Bookmarked by kataurah
10 Dec 2024
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Summary
Laszlo: 🧙♂️
Laszlo: Look Nadja, they even have me in my favorite hat.
Nadja: 🙄
Nandor the Relentless: guillermo look
Guillermo: What am I looking at
Nandor the Relentless: jahan
Nandor the Relentless: 🐴
Guillermo: 🥹
Nandor the Relentless: me andd jahan
Nandor the Relentless: 🧛♂️🐴
Guillermo: 🥹🥹
Nadja: Get a ducking room.
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Nadja has recently acquired a smartphone, on which she has been communicating with Guillermo. Laszlo finds out, and he wants in. He unwittingly opens the door to an unhinged housemate group chat.
Bookmarked by kataurah
20 Nov 2024
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Summary
“Y’all are sweet,” she says, and nods to indicate him and Cas. “Is he your—are you all together?”
Dean’s still contemplating how to answer this without saying something offensive—he never has figured out a polite way to say “no homo”—when Cas answers for him. Cas doesn’t even look up from his plate, his mouth full of baklava and some stray flakes of phyllo dough sticking to his lips when he says, “Yes.”
Dean feels more than sees Sam go very still across the table, forkful of salad and grilled chicken poised in midair.
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In which Cas is human and doesn't understand basic concepts like: clothing, Mythbusters, moisturizer, and Greek food. Dean is...Dean and doesn't understand basic concepts like: boyfriends, language, how to tell your friend that he's a walking miracle, and when not to quip.
Series
- Part 1 of Stories Are Made of Mistakes
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 4,942
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 6
- Comments:
- 370
- Kudos:
- 8,736
- Bookmarks:
- 1,587
- Hits:
- 81,619
Bookmarked by kataurah
18 Nov 2024