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Paradise (spread out with a butter knife) by Sarah_Sandwich
Fandoms: Spider-Man - All Media Types, Deadpool - All Media Types, Marvel (Comics)
17 Jan 2021
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Summary
He sighs from where he’s prone, arms akimbo, and roof gravel digging into his spine. “I lost my job. My… other job. The one that actually pays the bills.”
He doesn’t want to dwell on why he’s telling Deadpool of all people. Surely it has nothing to do with his desperate lack of friends. MJ is in California chasing her dreams, Harry’s undergoing treatment for his mental health and isn’t allowed visitors (not that it matters since they blacklisted Peter after last time), and Gwen… Well.
And it’s not like he can talk to Aunt May without her worrying about him starving to death under a bridge or something so… Deadpool it is. Man, when did his life get this pathetic?
OR: The one where Peter and Wade are literal soulmates but don't realize it for literal years because they're literal idiots.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 72,376
- Chapters:
- 5/5
- Collections:
- 21
- Comments:
- 769
- Kudos:
- 10,940
- Bookmarks:
- 3,081
- Hits:
- 116,925
Bookmarked by jpnycabfa
06 Dec 2023
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Summary
“How did you get past the wards?” Derek had put them up, with Peter’s grudging assistance, after the Alpha pack had made themselves at home a few times too many.
The guy pulled a face. “You mean the wards a five-year-old girl with the mental ability of a goldfish could deconstruct?” He blinked wide eyes at Derek. “Gee, I don’t know. It’s bound to go down as one of life’s great mysteries.”
Derek despised him.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 83,600
- Chapters:
- 6/6
- Collections:
- 8
- Comments:
- 1,042
- Kudos:
- 15,892
- Bookmarks:
- 6,054
- Hits:
- 433,365
Bookmarked by jpnycabfa
25 Nov 2023
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Summary
Darcy meets her soulmate. It's basically a complete disaster.
*Story is on hiatus.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 40,268
- Chapters:
- 9/?
- Collections:
- 4
- Comments:
- 498
- Kudos:
- 3,381
- Bookmarks:
- 1,007
- Hits:
- 48,949
Bookmarked by jpnycabfa
02 Nov 2023
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Summary
There are many things on Jack's mind. Namely: hockey, hockey, Bitty, hockey, anxiety, hockey, hockey, anxiety, Bitty, hockey, hockey, anxiety, and hockey.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 14,366
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 3
- Comments:
- 277
- Kudos:
- 5,900
- Bookmarks:
- 996
- Hits:
- 69,098
Bookmarked by jpnycabfa
07 Aug 2023
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Summary
"Right now, you're suffering under an enormous weight. We provide... leverage."
Stiles has been many different names over the years. His real name, nicknames, the infamous con artist and grifter Mischief, and now he's playing Robin Hood as Stiles with an ex-FBI agent and a band of thieves. "For better or for worse" turns out to be a little more binding than he had planned when he runs into Peter again. "Stealing a heart" sounds so romantic until it involves betrayal and life on the outside of the law.
Featuring Lydia as a disillusioned FBI agent turned mastermind, Stiles as a smooth-talking chameleon of a grifter (and a mastermind in his own right), Derek as a cranky hitter born and raised in the life, Danny as the kind of hacker the US government wishes it had, Allison as an assassin-turned-thief. Peter is Stiles' surprise husband, and Scott is supportive even from his jail cell.
- Words:
- 7,692
- Works:
- 2
- Bookmarks:
- 77
Bookmarked by jpnycabfa
07 Aug 2023