Cinnamontails
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“That is, if you can convince me to hire you.”
“Convince you?” Zoraya snorted. “We both know you haven’t been able to keep an assistant for longer than six weeks since your appointment as magistrate.”
“That doesn’t mean there aren’t a great many contenders for the position,” Astarion said. “The applications come in daily. Sometimes in written form, sometimes more … mouth-to-mouth, so to speak. I believe you’ll have to put in quite the effort to distinguish yourself from your competition. We can start your evaluation right now, if you’d like.”
“And what were you thinking of, exactly?”
He leaned back further, the grin curling around his lips. “Why don’t you go down on your knees for me, darling. It’ll be so much easier to explain that way.”
She studied him with raised eyebrows, momentarily wondering what had ever possessed her to develop feelings for this utter waste of oxygen."Beauty and the Beast" meets "Suits"
Or: What if Magistrarion had a badass half Gur childhood bestie who's definitely not in love with him and starts working for him right as a certain pale-faced, red-eyed nobleman gets ready to make his move?
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The Accountant’s Guide to Taking Down an Evil Vampire Lord (and maybe bagging Astarion while you are at it) by Cinnamontails
Fandoms: Baldur's Gate (Video Games)
07 Nov 2024
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“Fine,” she said. “Do you know the statistically most common way for the authorities to take out organized crime?”
Well, if that was her idea of enticing conversation, it was no wonder she had all those evenings free to chase after scoundrels like him. Still, Astarion didn’t want to antagonize her further and ruin the game, so he pursed his lips and guessed, “A very large, well-placed cannon?”
“Tax fraud.”
She looked at him as if she expected some sort of reaction – maybe a dramatic gasp? A palm flung to his forehead in a theatrical rendition of How could I not think of this?
Everything he could muster was a blink. “Tax … fraud.”
She nodded, obviously excited about what Astarion was sure were two of the most boring words in the English language, combined.
"That's how we'll take down Cazador." -
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“I want you to do whatever you see fit,” she said. “I want to be completely and utterly at your mercy. I want you to use me. To take whatever you want from me until I’m crying and begging and neither of us can tell if it’s because I want you to stop or to go even harder.” She emphasized that last bit with a roll of her hips, grinding herself against him and—
Fuck, he was big.
Like, really big.
Surely, there was something else inside those trousers. A gun, probably. Yes, that’s what it was. A very normal, very gangster-y gun.
Or: The Mafia AU I never ended up writing, but I have a handful of banger scenes for it, so here we are.
Series
- Part 1 of Big Dick Mafia!Astarion
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“But I’ve read widely on the topic! I have studied all the great works on the art of lovemaking! I know all the positions, all the techniques — I’m practically already an expert!”
Oh, you poor fool.
Vivian couldn’t help but smile as she closed the distance between them. “I’m sure you think that way, equation boy,” she said, reaching for a strand of his long, brown hair and tucking it behind his ear. “But see, the thing is this …” She leaned in close and whispered, “This is an empirical science. You can really only learn it by trying it out yourself. Getting your hands a little dirty, so to speak.”Or: The one in which I give Rolan an Academia AU where he learns what he cannot learn from books and gathers the courage to stand up to his cruel master.
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(Podfic) The Accountant’s Guide to Taking Down an Evil Vampire Lord (and maybe bagging Astarion while you are at it) by bananaiguana for Cinnamontails
Fandoms: Baldur's Gate (Video Games)
22 Nov 2024
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Summary
“Fine,” she said. “Do you know the statistically most common way for the authorities to take out organized crime?”
Well, if that was her idea of enticing conversation, it was no wonder she had all those evenings free to chase after scoundrels like him. Still, Astarion didn’t want to antagonize her further and ruin the game, so he pursed his lips and guessed, “A very large, well-placed cannon?”
“Tax fraud.”
She looked at him as if she expected some sort of reaction – maybe a dramatic gasp? A palm flung to his forehead in a theatrical rendition of How could I not think of this?
Everything he could muster was a blink. “Tax … fraud.”
She nodded, obviously excited about what Astarion was sure were two of the most boring words in the English language, combined.
"That's how we'll take down Cazador."Bookmarked by Cinnamontails
20 Nov 2024
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The Festival of Fools - a carnival of magic and illusions which shall set your heart ablaze and bring your dreams to life.
Legends say that the Festival of Fools will grant one wish to those pure of heart and soul - for a price. Seeking a cure for the Curse of Stone which plagues her people, Elysia Thorne seeks the aid of the festival's enigmatic ringmaster, Astarion Ancunin, whose charm is as dangerous as it is irresistible.
But as their fates intertwine, it becomes clear that all is not as it seems...
"The fools will dance beneath the stars,
In painted masks with shining scars,
A world of light, where laughter sings,
But hides the weight of darker things.The Ringmaster smiles with lips so sweet,
Pale as moonlight, cold as sleet.
His crimson eyes, a lure, a flame,
And none who enter leave the same.His charm will lead you to the show,
Where secrets stir and shadows grow,
But some who play may never leave,
For strings are pulled, and fools believe.A Little Star, both bright and chained,
By hands unseen, forever stained."Bookmarked by Cinnamontails
30 Oct 2024
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Inexperienced in the ways of love, you often find yourself labelled an overthinker. But then again, you are a scientist. When your incredibly beautiful travelling companion proposes a night you'll never forget, suddenly you're left wondering, are you really ready for this? Ever the scientist, you propose an experiment, and get more than you bargained for.
The Scientific Method is a glimpse into the key moments of the growing relationship between Astarion and a nerdy, overthinking reader.
Series
- Part 1 of The Scientific Method
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 11,888
- Chapters:
- 2/?
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 20
- Kudos:
- 191
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- 38
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- 2,261
Bookmarked by Cinnamontails
18 Sep 2024
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Tav woke up in an unfamiliar bed, with a bad headache and a bed companion in the shape of an archduke. Unfortunately for Tav, her memories were quite muddled. So when the lump next to her called her "wife", she may have been more than a little bit freaked out.
Or,
Enver Gortash woke up to find his wife trying to kill him. Again. This was all very inconvenient.
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A story of love, one might say. But not these two. No, these two would say that their story was built upon death threats and late night barrelmancy negotiations, and Disintegration spells that missed and the Power Word Kill that didn't. Love was only the ambush Gortash walked into once, and Tav walked into twice.
**Now updated with Bonus Extended Epilogue Chapter**
Series
- Part 1 of Don't Forget You Love Me
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 56,867
- Chapters:
- 12/12
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 596
- Kudos:
- 1,167
- Bookmarks:
- 217
- Hits:
- 21,036
Bookmarked by Cinnamontails
04 Sep 2024
Bookmarker's Notes
Look, I know it's the racoon man, but he's the goddamn sweetest in this fic. The writing is so cheeky and fun, please, give it a go!
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long summer days can lead to lazy vices by PouroverPaloma
Fandoms: Baldur's Gate (Video Games)
18 Apr 2024
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“Do you come when you touch yourself?” he asked.
“What?” Her world had either stopped spinning or rapidly accelerated; she wasn’t sure.
“When you lie awake at night,” he purred, caressing clawed fingertips over the inside of her knee, “fucking yourself on your lovely fingers, do you climax then?”
She nodded. Why lie? A hot pulse of need bloomed in her cunt. This afternoon had already taken several turns, and at this point, she was just along for the ride.A series of bad hookups has Tav feeling less like a hero and more like a born reject. She sneaks into Sorcerous Sundries to look for a cure. She finds it—in the tower's new proprietor.
Bookmarked by Cinnamontails
19 Apr 2024
Bookmarker's Notes
The one we had a collective lunchtime freakout over.