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  1. Tags
    Summary

    All he knows is that he woke up in his old New York apartment alone with his phone claiming it was 2014, and his next thoughts were a flurry of “what the actual fuck” and “I need to find Patrick.”

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,300
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Comments:
    122
    Kudos:
    306
    Bookmarks:
    19
    Hits:
    2,870
  2. Tags
    Summary

    5 times patrick experiences a new home on his own, and one time he doesn't have to.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,956
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    30
    Kudos:
    164
    Bookmarks:
    8
    Hits:
    827
  3. Tags
    Summary

    Chuckling, David pecks one more kiss on his adorably creased forehead. In what David thinks is response, Patrick’s hands land heavily in his chest with a muted thump.

    “David,” he breathes, eyes raking over the expanse of his chest. And it’s rude, because there’s nothing David can do about that except try to pry his fiancés hands off of him, which is the exact opposite of what he wants at nearly all times. Before he can though, hands already wrapped around his wrists, Patrick says with a soft reverence David’s never heard from him, “You’re so shiny, babe, and- and sparkly, holy fuck you’re so sparkly.”

    ---
    patrick really, really likes the sequins on david's sweater.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,645
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    67
    Kudos:
    291
    Bookmarks:
    27
    Hits:
    1,656
  4. Tags
    Summary

    David’s hand comes to cover both of his, because he knows Patrick with a depth and hunger no one else prior thought was ever necessary; like he understands intimately that Patrick has always been quickly regarded a certain way, a way that no one thought was worth a second glance, nothing more hiding under the surface. But David knew, saw the shape of everything simmering under Patrick’s skin, and he wanted more.

    ---

    or, the author was home over the holidays or, for the second time, the different parts of patrick's life collide to kinda sorta blow up in his general vicinity

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,533
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    72
    Kudos:
    235
    Bookmarks:
    29
    Hits:
    1,770
  5. Tags
    Summary

    “You’re gonna stretch the fabric!” David hisses, though no real bite to it considering he follows easily.

    Patrick tightens his arm around David’s waist, his hand wandering beneath the shirt and seeking shower-clean skin. Nosing along the bit of collarbone that’s exposed and conveniently placed in front of him, he says, “It’s my shirt.”

    “Yes,” David says. “And it’s about time you learned proper fabric care.”

    He nips at the skin in front of him, soothing it over with a kiss. “Yet here you are, in my shirt.”

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,731
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    50
    Kudos:
    283
    Bookmarks:
    18
    Hits:
    1,748
  6. Tags
    Summary

    Their wedding song is playing at Brebner’s.

    No, not their wedding song; their song. Not that David would ever try to claim the downright divine masterpieces of Tina Turner — he generally believes that couples having “songs” is cheesy and off-putting — but dammit, if anyone earned a song, this song, it’s him and Patrick.

    ---

    or, sometimes you have a mini breakdown in the ice cream aisle of the supermarket, and that’s okay

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    856
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    48
    Kudos:
    212
    Bookmarks:
    15
    Hits:
    1,099
  7. Tags
    Summary

    She toys with one of the roses, adjusts one of the sprigs of lavender. The colors are bright and cheery, and they all smell so sweet; they’re lovely, and any embarrassment Stevie felt standing there in the middle of the flower shop disappeared when she saw the mix.

    ---

    or, stevie is still figuring out the steps of this whole serious relationship thing

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,626
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    14
    Kudos:
    26
    Bookmarks:
    3
    Hits:
    243
  8. Tags
    Summary

    It was supposed to be funny.

    But here Patrick is, torn between clutching it in his hands and treating it with precious reverence, crying.
     
    David is making his husband cry. On Christmas Eve.

    ---

    or, david thinks he's funny (he's not)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,773
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    95
    Kudos:
    397
    Bookmarks:
    25
    Hits:
    2,209
  9. Tags
    Summary

    Maybe David is making the biggest mistake of his life, pursuing this thing with Patrick.

    ---

    or, some early relationship feelings and anxieties

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,174
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    26
    Kudos:
    120
    Bookmarks:
    4
    Hits:
    1,059
  10. Tags
    Summary

    Since no one is pressing him for information, David will be quick to admit, even just to himself, that he flips out a tad bit the first time it happens. He can’t really be blamed, because pseudo-time-travel via dreams isn’t quite the course one expects their life to take, so he believes he’s warranted the “What the fuck?” and literal double takes as he stands outside of the motel in the pajamas he fell asleep in, his sleep joggers and one of Patrick’s bird shirts.

    ---

    or, david starts dreaming about his past. well, he's at least 87% sure they're just dreams. because it would be insane if he was actually having nightly conversations with his past self, right? right.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    46,210
    Chapters:
    7/7
    Comments:
    234
    Kudos:
    282
    Bookmarks:
    49
    Hits:
    4,902
  11. Tags
    Summary

    “You would not believe what Roland tried to market for the store today— um. Patrick? What is that?”

    “Hi. What’s what?”

    “Yeah, hi. That… thing that our cat is sitting in? What is that?”

    ---

    or, patrick makes a totally not impulsive purchase and david is less than thrilled

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    696
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    38
    Kudos:
    119
    Bookmarks:
    10
    Hits:
    847
  12. Tags
    Summary

    Patrick cautiously takes the stick of the flag between two fingers, holding it up to the light to inspect. “Then how the hell—”

    “Maybe the delivery person left it.”

    “Sure. Remind me what delivery we received between 6:30 last night and right now, 8 in the morning?”

    David pauses. He looks around the space, exactly as they left it last night except for the mini pride flag they had found sitting atop the front counter. “Well, maybe the delivery person meant to leave it earlier yesterday, but forgot, so they came back last night to drop it off.”

    ---

    or, pride flags suddenly pop up everywhere in schitt's creek, and no one knows why

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,142
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    12
    Kudos:
    46
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    306
  13. Tags
    Summary

    “We should get married.”

    David drops his pencil, smearing some of the graphite on his page, which, fuck, but Patrick— Patrick just said— fuck. David stares at this boyfriend for all of two seconds tops before he composes himself the best he can. “Yes.”

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,141
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    46
    Kudos:
    270
    Bookmarks:
    14
    Hits:
    1,571
  14. Tags
    Summary

    He’s sweaty, Patrick is glowing, and David would ask him to marry him again if he was able to speak more than just jumbled praise and encouragement, anything to keep Patrick inside him, his comforting weight blanketed over him as he takes David apart using every trick he’s been undoubtedly taking note of over the past several years.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,797
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    56
    Kudos:
    312
    Bookmarks:
    34
    Hits:
    2,694
  15. Tags
    Summary

    “Ah!”
     
    “Who died?!” David peers into the hallway where Stevie’s poking at her face in the mirror. “Um, what’re you doing?”

    She frowns and prods at a dimple. “What’s my face doing?” She scrunches her nose, glaring at herself before relaxing into a gentle smile, not her usual scowl. “I think something’s wrong with it. Can you drive me to the hospital?”

    She looks over to her friend when he doesn’t respond. “What?”

    David shakes his head. “Nothing, just— I’m really glad you’re happy.”

    She tries, and fails, to suppress her smile at that. “Keep it in your pants, David.”

    ---

    or, 69 stevie-centric drabbles that no one asked for yet i wrote anyway

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    6,900
    Chapters:
    23/23
    Comments:
    87
    Kudos:
    95
    Bookmarks:
    2
    Hits:
    2,868
  16. Tags
    Summary

    Stupid fucking childhood pact and his husband’s unwavering loyalty.

    ---

    or, patrick has to be out of town on their anniversary, and david is Coping

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,286
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    37
    Kudos:
    160
    Bookmarks:
    13
    Hits:
    996
  17. Tags
    Summary

    So, his ex-fiancée and his best friend, neither of whom he’s even remotely dating, know he’s gay and so embarrassingly close to blurting out to David how kissable his face is, among other things. Which is great. Truly. Patrick’s doing great.
    ---

    or, for some godawful reason, literally everyone in schitt's creek thinks patrick and stevie are dating

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,634
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    61
    Kudos:
    312
    Bookmarks:
    32
    Hits:
    2,192
  18. Tags
    Summary

    There’s a bee in front of David.

    It’s just… staring at him.

    And here he thought it would be a good, healthy choice to eat his lunch outside today, to enjoy nature and get vitamin D and all that bullshit.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,150
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    32
    Kudos:
    172
    Bookmarks:
    13
    Hits:
    984
  19. Tags
    Summary

    Patrick, as it turns out, is in deep shit.

    ---

    or, maybe don't leave a notepad with doodles of your business partner/friend/crush out on the counter for them to find

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,625
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    108
    Kudos:
    439
    Bookmarks:
    39
    Hits:
    2,617
  20. Tags
    Summary

    Stevie has a wife.
    Stevie has a wife.
    A through sickness and health, till death do us part, stupidly hot wife

    ---

    or, it’s soft. i just wanted to write something sweet and soft

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,496
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    14
    Kudos:
    36
    Bookmarks:
    2
    Hits:
    243

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