1 - 20 of 62 Works in Touch-Starved Stede Bonnet
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It’s been 6 years since Stede and Mary got divorced.
It’s been 7 years since he came out.
It’s been 8 years since he last had sex.
And now he’s standing on the other side of his 40th birthday wondering if he ever will again. -
the secret middle-aged sad-sack mostly bad vibes I can sing along to playlist by yerbamansa
Fandoms: Our Flag Means Death (TV)
27 Nov 2024
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Stede figures out he's gay at the ripe age of 41, gets divorced, and...still lives with Mary. Because he's unemployed, and it turns out piracy isn't a viable career choice for him right now. This is about finding your people and starting over. I hope.
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After a lifetime to doing what was expected of him, Stede Bonnet finds himself jobless, disowned, divorced (happily) and newly out. He runs to the one place he had always felt safe: his late grandmother's summer home in Purple Bay, Nova Scotia where they had spent most of Stede's summer's together when he was a child.
It isn't the same without his grandmother Anne, of course. Stede misses her, misses his children, his ex wife Mary and even Mary's boyfriend Doug. Can he make a new life for himself here in this small town, can he carve out some happiness for himself? Can he make lasting friendships? Can he survive Ed, his neighbour across the road? He's easily the most beautiful person Stede has ever seen...
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A semi re-write of the ending of Season One and all of Season Two, Izzy apologized for what he did and tried to help Edward instead of kicking him when he was already down. The Kraken appaers after Edward spends some time on the Anne, nearly killing Stedes crew and Izzy in the process.
Stede returns to a shell of a human and isn't welcomed as much as he wanted, and is surprised to find Izzy in a new light.I love Zheng but she only shows up a little and isn't part of the main story much. Ricky is a bitch and doesn't exist at all.
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Edward Teach returns as defending men's Wimbledon champion to go for a record breaking tenth consecutive singles title there, but wild card Stede Bonnet threatens to steal the title, and possibly his heart..
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Even in the Dark, I'm Glowing by petrichorca, ThatJadeykinns, veeagainst
Fandoms: Our Flag Means Death (TV)
18 Oct 2024
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Edward Teach needs a break from his lonely, high-pressure life, so he moves into a lighthouse overlooking Lake Calypso, where tourists flock in hopes of spotting its famous but elusive cryptid. What he doesn't know is that there is a real creature in the lake, just as touch-starved - and kinky - as he is.
Stede finds the long-haired human fascinating, and beautiful. He just doesn't know how to bridge the distance between them. But when a chance meeting brings them together, the sparks are instant.
Written for 2024 OFMD Kinktober, day 18 - a smutty monsterfucking collaboration from Vee, Pez, and Jadeykinns!
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Olu gives him a pleading look, his eyes soft and gentle, and Stede has to take a breath to steady himself.
"Well...maybe, but..." he stammers, and the hand on his shoulder slips a little lower.
"Captain." Olu's voice is lower now, almost a whisper, and Stede can feel the warmth of his breath on his ear. "Please?"
Stede Bonnet has a heretofore unexplored captain kink. Oluwande exploits it. -
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It's the Winter Olympics and Edward Teach is hoping for a final gold medal after a disastrous knee injury. Stede Bonnet is on his own for the first time, both skating partnership and marriage with Mary ended.
When they meet, sparks fly. -
Podfic of "a little bit closer" by fake_geek_boy by PilotPiratePods
Fandoms: Our Flag Means Death (TV)
16 Jul 2024
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Podfic Time: 39:41
Ed’s therapist has a pretty good poker face—he assumes it’s something they teach you at therapist school—but Ed catches the look of pity that flashes lightning quick across her features.
And yeah, so what. Ed hasn’t been held in longer than he can remember. It’s not like it’s gonna kill him, right?
“It’s not going to kill you, no. But humans are social creatures, we’re not meant to go without loving touch for that long. It’s bad for our brains.”
“Okay, and? What am I supposed to do about that? Just scour the city until I find one of those ‘free hugs’ people and hope they’re not a complete weirdo?”
“No, but there are professional services you can go to, if you don’t feel comfortable initiating that kind of contact with people closer to you.”
“Professional—I thought you said that wasn’t what you meant? If I just want to bone down, I can find someone at a bar or whatever. No offence to the many sex workers who are providing an invaluable service to this city, obviously.”
“No, not that kind of professional.”
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Podfic of Watch the Sun Rise by remreader by Baby_kraken for remreader
Fandoms: Our Flag Means Death (TV)
04 Jul 2024
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This delightful missing scene with Stede and Ed is set just after the lighthouse fuckery.
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With his marriage hanging on by a thread and an unfulfilling position at his father's firm boring him half to death, real estate lawyer Stede Bonnet gives into his lifelong wanderlust and takes up his first opportunity to go abroad for business after all his colleagues turn it down. His assignment – travel from New York City to the Caribbean to meet with his client, a reclusive, retired ship captain, and stay as a guest in his mansion to facilitate a property sale. Nothing out of the ordinary here!
An OFMD Dracula AU, featuring extra silliness and a couple of idiots in love
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“You transformed when you hit the water.” Ed speaks slowly, watching Stede’s face all the while. “And the transformation… healed you. You knew it would. That’s why you jumped overboard.” He pauses. “How much of that have I got right?”
Stede replies, “All of it.”Or: Stede is a sea-creature sometimes, tentacles and all. Ed is very into it. Tentacles and all.
(Canon-divergent AU beginning at the end of s01e06.)
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Stede Bonnet isn’t a fan of where his life is currently. His closest (some would say only) friend is his ex-fiancee Mary, he still works a soul-sucking job at his father’s firm, and he’s never felt like he’s belonged in the world.
Then one night, something—someone—reaches out to him; a shadowy being who helps bring light into his life.
Series
- Part 12 of The Gospel of Ace4Ace Gentlebeard
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Ed gets asked to complete a very special task. Things do not go as planned.
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A multi chapter fic for MerMay 2024! New chapters will be added daily :) in my dreams, life and all that noise happens.Fun, fluffy, and a surprising amount of violence. Dive in!
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Moonstone Mage Championship by Blakbonnet (Meowbowwow)
Fandoms: Our Flag Means Death (TV)
11 May 2024
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When Ed gets heckled by Stede during a magical performance, his plans are to shout at the guy and never see him again.
Turns out, Stede is as insane as Ed, and a surprising turn of events leads to Ed teaching the hot ding dong how to get better at magic.
Can they get through the deadly Moonstone Mage Championship?
Three Challenges - there can only be one winner!
[Map of the world in A/N]
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#NeedforStede by WellSussed (drcfxtina) for Frawg_Spawn
Fandoms: Our Flag Means Death (TV)
04 Apr 2024
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Stede’s hot, and his very queer audience has noticed. This is fine. It’s what Ed expected to see. He can relate, after all.
Ed should stop scrolling there.
He does not.
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Ed's in love with his best friend, Stede--and once he starts becoming famous, so is the entire internet, and Ed's hot and bothered about it.
Series
- Part 1 of #ThirstVerse
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Stede would admit to having read a book or two about pirates, but no literature could have prepared him for an actual face to face encounter with said people.
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Stede Bonnet, wealthy landowner, held hostage by pirates.
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The man typed for a moment before nodding. “Yep, got you right here. Hey, Ed! Doug! Your clients are here!”
Two men entered the lobby from the back hallway. One had floppy brown hair. The other was… well, mesmerizing was the only word Stede could think of that was anywhere near enough to describe him. Moon-streaked curls cascaded over constellations of freckles and sunspots. Tattoos lined the man’s arms, telling a story of stars and shipwrecks and games lost long ago. And his eyes… Stede had never seen such eyes, eyes that seemed to contain the entire universe.
“Hey there.” The silver-haired man’s voice was silky and rich. “Name’s Ed.” He shook Stede’s hand with a firm, velvety touch. Not taking his eyes off of Stede, he tilted his head toward the man at the counter. “Frenchie, which one of these lovely people is with me today?”
OR
Stede Bonnet has his gay awakening via therapist-prescribed couple's massage.
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“What do you mean it's me?” Edward laughed. He took a step closer. “You were the one dancing around and ogling me from behind the scenes.”
“No, I was not! I'd hardly call that dancing and I definitely wasn't… ogling you!” His stomach did a full on somersault when Ed raised his eyebrows and smiled deviously, then took another step. This was not good.
“Yeah? Then what would you call it?”
or Stede is so deep in denial about his feelings, Ed is playing along and they fuck about it
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Prince Stede of Bonnet is en route to be married to the King of Low when his ship is overtaken by pirates. Stede offers himself up to the Dread Pirate Blackbeard in exchange for freeing the rest of his people. He does not expect Blackbeard to propose marriage as a part of their agreement, but if it is a choice between the kind of monster Ned is and the kind of monster Blackbeard is, that is an exceedingly easy choice to make.