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  1. Tags
    Summary

    Simon Salisbury is hoping to fix up his home in time for Christmas.

    Featuring an ambitious amount of home restoration, comfortable but questionable fashion choices, and getting to know someone new, at Christmas ❄️🤍

    Written for Carry On Countdown 2024

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    22,295
    Chapters:
    15/24
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    139
    Kudos:
    72
    Bookmarks:
    5
    Hits:
    1,033
  2. Tags
    Summary

    Breaking curfew's a bad idea. Especially tonight. Simon's got no choice- if he doesn't get his affairs in order, he's going to be in big trouble with the Coven. One quick walk in the dark can't hurt, can it? Except when it does. Except when the dark comes for him, and all he can hope for is the help of a stranger as lost and trapped as he is.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    94,755
    Chapters:
    10/11
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    18
    Kudos:
    57
    Bookmarks:
    12
    Hits:
    1,119
  3. Tags
    Summary

    I open my eyes and see the Mage standing just inside the door, looking amused. No, not amused. There is something darker beneath the surface.

    He is not supposed to look amused. He is not supposed to look anything. The Mage is dead.

    The Mage is dead and I gave my magic away. The Mage is dead and I was home with Baz, sleeping after we watched a film on his laptop in bed.

    The Mage is dead and I killed him.

     

    (Simon Snow is granted three years worth of memory on his first day back and he does everything in his heroic power to make sure that things turn out better this way. With the power of his magic and memory on his side, he will save the day, steal the kiss and get his happy ending.)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    14,032
    Chapters:
    7/?
    Comments:
    68
    Kudos:
    147
    Bookmarks:
    31
    Hits:
    1,361
  4. Tags
    Summary

    Baz has a horrible toothache... he struggles to find a dentist that can help him. Simon is always there to help.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,910
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    1
    Kudos:
    18
    Hits:
    243
  5. Tags
    Summary

    The day before his wedding Nico wakes up in Vegas with three hungover dads, two missing teeth, one pissed off vampire king, and no memory of the night before. Can they get him to the church on time?

    Welcome to the The Hangover AU you never knew you needed.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,364
    Chapters:
    1/5
    Comments:
    15
    Kudos:
    7
    Bookmarks:
    3
    Hits:
    78
  6. Tags
    Summary

    Some rules are made to be broken.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    6,620
    Chapters:
    3/3
    Comments:
    31
    Kudos:
    17
    Bookmarks:
    4
    Hits:
    179
  7. Tags
    Summary

    Ever since their truce fell apart in eighth year, Simon and Baz have been stuck. Chained to the past, hiding from their regrets, unable to step forward into the future. When a chance encounter reunites them, they find themselves falling right back into old patterns of behaviour. Until something completely unexpected brings them closer—a shared interest in a psychology podcast called Invisible Mind.

    And as Simon and Baz begin to understand their own hidden depths, they also realise maybe they don't need to hide from each other.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    73,142
    Chapters:
    7/8
    Comments:
    244
    Kudos:
    174
    Bookmarks:
    43
    Hits:
    6,662
  8. Tags
    Summary

    A year and a half ago, Baz Pitch was an average (magickal) teenager with a crush, a best friend, two parents, plenty of Old Family money and an only-slightly-oppressive family legacy to uphold. Now, a few things have changed. He's a vampire, for one. And his days look a little different--he's vowed to avenge his mother's murder, clear her name, and recover his family's property--in between acing Magic Words exams, tracking down lost pets, helping out hapless fellow Watford students with their problems, and trying not to endanger everyone he loves just by being near them. Thank god he's good at multitasking.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    26,576
    Chapters:
    4/9
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    82
    Kudos:
    30
    Bookmarks:
    12
    Hits:
    821
  9. Tags
    Summary

    Simon Snow and Baz Grimm Pitch have been cast to star as the leads in a new movie, Carry On. The only problem is that they can't stand each other and in the movie they eventually fall in love. Simon doesn't really like acting, but since the death of his mother and the shocking reunion with his celebrity father as a child, he has worked hard as an actor to maintain the family name. Baz likes acting, but not in the kinds of movies his overbearing father pushes on him. Still, Baz can't help but feel like he needs to impress him, especially since the controversial death of his mother. So Simon and Baz decide to work together, regardless of their tense past. But as they act out their characters' romance, they begin to wonder if the feelings they have are just for the camera or maybe something more.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    50,305
    Chapters:
    24/24
    Comments:
    246
    Kudos:
    605
    Bookmarks:
    71
    Hits:
    8,193
  10. Tags
    Summary

    Baz started Watford determined to hide his vampirism at almost any cost. But what if the Mage had confronted him about his secret? What if, instead of threatening to expose him, the Mage offered to help him? And what would be the consequences of accepting his enemy’s help?

    A canon divergence fic looking at the ripple effects the Mage's offer would have on Watford, the wars, and Baz’s relationship with Simon Snow.

    Year two now complete!

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    52,452
    Chapters:
    9/50
    Comments:
    100
    Kudos:
    62
    Bookmarks:
    14
    Hits:
    1,190
  11. Tags
    Summary

    Simon Snow won't get off the couch, and he won't go to America. Baz is ready to give up, ready to let Simon's break up speech finally reach its conclusion. He only wants to cast one spell first: Time is an illusion, a forbidden work of magic sent to him by his aunt.

    When it goes sideways, Simon finds himself back in time. Specifically, he is back to September of 1996, with Ebb, Fiona, and Nico still studying magic at Watford. There's something else, too. His magic is back.

    In an attempt to follow him, Baz and Penny find themselves also thrust back in time, but they open their eyes to May of 2002 and watch a headmistress with a child on her hip walk by.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    7,489
    Chapters:
    1/5
    Kudos:
    11
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    236
  12. Tags
    Summary

    Magic words are hard to come by in the post-apocalyptic wasteland, but that doesn’t stop the Speakers who want to build a better world. For some like Simon Snow, this means claiming precious resources that are guarded and squandered by the greedy and giving them to those most in need. But others have an eye on these resources; raiders, vampires, even those who claim to be the next stage of human evolution. And, of course, other mages.

    When Simon’s mission to New Vegas goes awry, he must accept the help of one of those ‘other’ Speakers; An old friend and enemy who uses dangerous magic, and who may also be a vampire.

    A fic for Carry On Disability Week.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,452
    Chapters:
    1/12
    Comments:
    2
    Kudos:
    12
    Bookmarks:
    2
    Hits:
    88
  13. Tags
    Summary

    Fiona Pitch struggles to find her place in the world

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    6,260
    Chapters:
    4/6
    Comments:
    32
    Kudos:
    9
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    146
  14. Tags
    Summary

    Baz cocks a thick brow, “Do you not want to?”

    “No. I want to,” I kiss Baz’s ear (He hates it when I do that)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    684
    Chapters:
    1/?
    Kudos:
    11
    Hits:
    92
  15. Tags
    Summary

    In a human world where creatures are expected to keep their heads down, Simon and Baz are trying to live their best lives, despite the secrets they both are hiding.

    Baz is a sought-after nutritionist, populating his Instagram with feel-good stories of his human clients, while discreetly treating his creature clients with true passion. He is accomplished, self-reliant and keeps others at arm’s length. Simon is a care home employee who is working towards realising his life’s dream of becoming a firefighter.

    Simon needs help getting his cholesterol numbers down so he can join the fire brigade. Baz is reluctant to take him on – this guy Snow comes on way too strong for Baz’s comfort. But Simon is determined to secure Baz’s assistance and maybe he'll help Baz open up enough to find what he's been missing too.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    77,697
    Chapters:
    22/29
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    302
    Kudos:
    153
    Bookmarks:
    35
    Hits:
    5,293
  16. Tags
    Summary

    Rationally, Ebb knows it's wrong to sleep with her brother's girlfriend.
    She can't be rational around Fiona Pitch.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    11,751
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Comments:
    13
    Kudos:
    13
    Bookmarks:
    4
    Hits:
    164
  17. Tags
    Summary

    Neuro-atypical uni student Baz Pitch has never had a boyfriend, or a first date. He’s never even been kissed. Up until now, he’s been too busy being…well. Neuro-atypical.

    He spends his days at uni and his nights working at the bookshop owned by his eccentric aunt’s on-again off-again boyfriend. He’s not doing it for the money—all he needs is something to get him out of the house. But he never expected a simple bookselling job to turn his entire world upside-down.

    Enter Simon Salisbury. He’s not sure where his life’s headed. He’s taken a gap year, and his girlfriend’s gone off to college in California and broken up with him. When his best friend Penelope takes him to the bookshop near her school for a coffee and a scone, he thinks all he’s getting is advice and commiseration. But then there's Baz.

    Simon’s determined to get to know the bloke at the bookshop, but Baz has spent a lifetime trapped inside his own mind. He knows that letting Simon get to know him means exposing the most vulnerable bits of himself. But love is vulnerable in itself, and sometimes trusting someone with our hearts is a risk worth taking.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    323,588
    Chapters:
    27/35
    Comments:
    1,455
    Kudos:
    1,929
    Bookmarks:
    329
    Hits:
    53,062
  18. Tags
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,591
    Chapters:
    2/?
    Kudos:
    7
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    131
  19. Tags
    Summary

    I’m on my feet before I can even tell what I’m doing. Snow steps back, but he’s too slow and I grab him by the collar of Agatha’s old jumper, holding him in place as I let my wand drop from my sleeve. He stands his ground, only reacting when my wand jabs into his throat, forcing his chin up. Our noses are almost touching, and I couldn’t care less. I’ll spell him until he doesn’t remember his own name.

    “Baz– calm down.” Snow’s wings lift, extending around me, and I force myself not to react to it. Just as I force myself to ignore his gaze dropping down from my eyes. I don’t think about the last time we were this close, or that when he kissed me he was trying to calm me down. I hope he doesn’t kiss me.

    (Only so that I don’t have to hope he does.)

    ~~~

    Simon and Baz team up after years apart to save Fiona from the wrath of the Coven, while Agatha helps a teenager who has been turned into a werewolf avoid the same fate.

    Five years post-Carry On

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    45,315
    Chapters:
    7/?
    Comments:
    10
    Kudos:
    37
    Bookmarks:
    4
    Hits:
    1,047
  20. Tags
    Summary

    Tyrannus Basilton Grimm Pitch has always considered himself the perfect practicing young wizard. It just so happens his father demands it of him as well. Baz has one little drawback: being a vampire, he would be immediately expelled if anyone were to find out. After facing the worst summer in his life, he returns only to be pestered by Simon Snow.

    Once Simon Snow accidentally spells Baz to 'Spill the Tea,' he knows way more about Baz than the brat ever wanted... he drives himself mad with guilt at invading Baz's person business even though they are mortal enemies... right?
    ---
    "𝘚𝘱𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘛𝘦𝘢!" 𝘚𝘪𝘮𝘰𝘯 𝘥𝘦𝘮𝘢𝘯𝘥𝘦𝘥 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘔𝘢𝘨𝘪𝘤 𝘴𝘱𝘪𝘭𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘰𝘧 𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘣𝘦𝘪𝘯𝘨. 𝘉𝘢𝘻 𝘳𝘢𝘪𝘴𝘦𝘥 𝘢𝘯 𝘦𝘺𝘦𝘣𝘳𝘰𝘸 𝘣𝘦𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘦 𝘪𝘵 𝘢𝘧𝘧𝘦𝘤𝘵𝘦𝘥 𝘩𝘪𝘮. 𝘚𝘪𝘮𝘰𝘯 𝘩𝘢𝘥 𝘣𝘦𝘦𝘯 𝘸𝘢𝘵𝘤𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘙𝘶𝘗𝘢𝘶𝘭'𝘴 𝘋𝘳𝘢𝘨 𝘙𝘢𝘤𝘦 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘗𝘦𝘯𝘯𝘺 𝘰𝘯 𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘦𝘯𝘤𝘩𝘢𝘯𝘵𝘦𝘥 𝘴𝘱𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘱𝘩𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘴𝘩𝘦 𝘬𝘦𝘱𝘵 𝘧𝘳𝘰𝘮 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘤𝘩𝘰𝘰𝘭 𝘧𝘢𝘤𝘶𝘭𝘵𝘺.

    "𝘐 𝘸𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘯𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘩𝘶𝘳𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶, 𝘚𝘪𝘮𝘰𝘯... 𝘐 𝘭-" 𝘉𝘢𝘻 𝘤𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘦𝘥 𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘮𝘰𝘶𝘵𝘩

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    7,195
    Chapters:
    5/?
    Comments:
    4
    Kudos:
    31
    Bookmarks:
    7
    Hits:
    1,256

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