What If...?
Jump to navigation
Jump to search
What If...? is an animated anthology series on the streaming service Disney . It is based on the Marvel Comics series of the same name, but focuses on events within the Marvel Cinematic Universe films (MCU). The series explores various alternate timelines from the MCU in which major moments occur differently.
Season 1
[edit]Introduction:
The Watcher: Time. Space. Reality. It's more than a linear path. It's a prism of endless possibility. Where a single choice can branch out into infinite realities, creating alternate worlds from the ones you know. I am the Watcher. I am your guide through these vast new realities. Follow me and ponder the question... "What if?"
- Peggy: I'm sorry. You were meant to be the one to end the war.
- Steve: Now you will. And don't worry about me. I never was much of a dancer anyway.
- Peggy: Maybe you haven't found the right partner.
- Col. John Flynn: You're an agent. You're not qualified for field duty.
- Captain Carter: Then you better promote me. "Captain" has a nice ring to it.
- Howard: Drowning your troubles? I thought you Brits were supposed to be resilient.
- Peggy: [sarcastic] Just the men, apparently.
- Howard: Can I give you a word of advice?
- Peggy: I'd rather you didn't.
- Howard: Flynn's a moron. Lucky for you, I'm a genius. [puts the box containing Peggy's costume on the table]
- Peggy: What's this?
- Howard: This was supposed to be your USO "let's go sell some war bonds" costume, but I made a few upgrades.
- Peggy: Your covert skills need work...
- Howard: Then this is gonna be awkward. [slams the shield onto the table]
- Steve: [wearing an armored battle suit resembling the Iron Man Mark I armor] Stark made me some new dancing shoes. What do you think?
- Captain Carter: Well, then we better start dancing.
- Peggy: The way people view me has changed. I'm no longer screaming to be heard, to be seen, to be in the room.
- Steve: To be respected. Must be nice. I'm still that skinny kid from Brooklyn, now just in a big metal suit.
- Peggy: You're more than the suit. The suit is nothing without the man inside it. You're my hero, Steve. I mean, you're a hero.
- Steve: You're my hero, too.
- Howard: Red, green, blue... Who paints a button blue?!
- Captain Carter: Don't tell me the American playboy needs help pushing buttons.
- Howard: Hedy Lamarr and I spent a weekend together, but she wasn't teaching me German!
- Korath the Pursuer: Who are you? Identify yourself!
- Star-Lord T'Challa: Who, me? I am just an ordinary junker. [unmasks and steps into the light] But there is one name you may know me by.
- Korath: Oh, my. Star-Lord! I'm a huge fan of your work! What are you doing here?
- Star-Lord T'Challa: That was not the reaction I was expecting.
- Yondu: You know, if we wanted to have some real fun, we'd make like the old days and sell this bad boy to the highest bidder.
- T'Challa: If we made like the old days, you'd only have half of your teeth. Besides, wouldn't you rather use it to jump-start the Krylorians' dying star, save their system from extinction? You know as well as I, no treasure is worth as much as the good that can be done with it.
- Thanos: I'm a big enough man to admit when I'm wrong. T'Challa here showed me there was more than one way to reallocate the universe's resources.
- T'Challa: Sometimes the best weapon in your arsenal is just a good argument.
- Thanos: Aye, aye, commander. Although I still assert my plan was not without its merits.
- Kraglin: Pretty sure it's still just genocide, big guy.
- Thanos: And I'm pretty sure it's efficient.
- T'Challa: The collection is much bigger than I anticipated. All this suffering, and for what?
- Howard: My guess: he's compensating for something big. Or small, if you catch my drift, eh?
- T'Challa: You are quite articulate for a duck.
- Howard: That, sir, is very close-minded.
- T'Challa: I've always felt at home up here. But now, knowing everything, I'm not quite sure where I belong.
- Yondu: Seen a lot of space travelers in my day, kid. And if I learned anything from watching you, on any planet, among any people, there ain't no place in this galaxy where you don't belong. Where you wanna be, that's the question, isn't it? You're just gonna have to follow your heart on that one, Mr. Star-Lord.
- Coulson: [about Thor] Suspect is caucasian male, mid-twenties, with...Really great hair.
- Fury: Excuse me...?
- Coulson: It's an accurate description. Sir, he’s gorgeous.
- Fury: [answering a cell call from Natasha] I'm a little busy here, Widow.
- Natasha: Oh, good. We'll start a support group. I've got General Ross, a dozen snipers and a few tanks. What are you dealing with?
- Fury: Space Vikings.
- Natasha: Showoff.
- [Loki is still attacking the S.H.I.E.L.D. agents with the casket]
- Fury: Declaring war on this planet will not bring your prince back!
- Sif: [stops Loki] Wait. He's not wrong. The All-Father would want us to listen.
- Fury: We have the same enemy here. The person who killed your brother also killed two of my people. Good people. We should be working together.
- Loki: We are not allies.
- Fury: Then let me help you. I promise, when I find your brother's killer, you will have your pound of flesh.
- Loki: [takes the staff that a member of the Einherjar has handed him] What a fascinating choice of words. But I shall require the entire corpse.
- Fury: You need to give me time.
- Loki: [glances at the sun, then turns back to Fury] Very well. You have until the next rise of Midgard's sun to deliver my brother's assassin, or I will reduce this planet to ash and ice.
- Coulson: [nervously] Why do you need my password?
- Natasha: [sighs] I need to get into the Avengers Initiative files, but I'm locked out of the system. And wanted for murder.
- Coulson: I'm not telling you my password, Romanoff.
- Natasha: Why not?
- Coulson: Because I'm not.
- Natasha: Coulson. Clint was your friend, too.
- Coulson: #SteveSteveSteveIHeartSteve0704.
- Natasha: Wow. Good one, Coulson.
- Coulson: What?
- Natasha: No, nothing. That's great. Thank you.
- [Natasha hears someone behind her.]
- Natasha: You won't win. [Stands up and turns to face the person] Not against me. Not against S.H.I.E.L.D.
- [Natasha gets thrown around repeatedly, dropping her phone in the process.]
- Nick Fury's voicemail: You found me. You know what to do.
- [Natasha keeps getting thrown around repeatedly until she is thrown up the ceiling, then falls on the floor.]
- Natasha: [Crawls towards her phone] Fury, it's Hope! It's all about Hope! [Gets dragged into the darkness]
- Loki: [addressing a subjugated Earth from the United Nations Headquarters] Good evening, my loyal subjects. It is with great pride that I stand before you today to announce that in just one day's time, the nations of Earth have put aside their differences and united under my command. It's the unspoken truth of humanity that you crave subjugation. The bright lure of freedom hobbles you, diminishes your life's joy. You were made to be ruled. So I have come... to help you fulfill... your destiny.
- Coulson: The Avengers fell before they had a chance to rise. May they rest in peace.
- Fury: They can. But we won't. The Avengers were always meant to be more than a team. They were an idea, the affirmation of humanity's need to believe that in our darkest hour, we will find our heroes.
- [Fury is exploring the Valkyrie.]
- The Watcher: [closing narration] I believe that in this universe, as in every other, hope never dies– as long as someone keeps their good eye on the bigger picture.
- [Fury notices Captain America's shield covered in snow, prompting him to crouch down and wipe away the snow covering the shield.]
- Fury: Welcome back, Captain. [Turns around and sees Carol behind him]
- Captain Marvel: So, where's the fight?
- The Watcher: We have watched how one moment, one choice, can ripple across space and time, giving birth to new stories. Heroes. Whole universes. But what if it's the wrong choice? What if the best of intentions has very strange consequences?
- O'Bengh: Come this way, Sorcerer Armani.
- Strange: No, it's- It's "Strange".
- O'Bengh: Not any stranger than any other name in this world.
- Strange: Where can I find Cagliostro?
- O'Bengh: Well, maybe here, maybe there. Maybe nowhere.
- Strange: [sarcastic] Wonderful. You're cryptic. Please tell me you're not Cagliostro.
- Christine: Hey, do you wanna talk? Maybe put on some music?
- Strange: I only want you. You're the only thing that matters.
- O'Bengh: Is she worth the pain? A man does not suffer like this for his own glory.
- Strange: Every moment of it.
- O'Bengh: There is a fine line between devotion and delusion. Love can break more than your heart. It can shatter your mind.
- Strange: Uh-huh. And in which book did you read that?
- O'Bengh: No book, Armani. Life taught me.
- The Watcher: [thinking out loud while observing Strange] He's on the wrong path. I could warn him. Intervene. But the fate of his universe is not worth risking the safety of all others. Besides, I doubt he'd listen.
- Dr. Strange: [hears the Watcher's voice] Hello? Who's there?
- O'Bengh: Even in our world, death is part of the plan.
- Strange Supreme: I can't accept that.
- O'Bengh: I know. I know. But maybe the other Strange will.
- Strange Supreme: "Other"?
- O'Bengh: Can't you see? You are only half a man, living half a life.
- Christine: I love you.
- Strange Supreme: I wish that was true, but you're... You're not her.
- Strange Supreme: [to the Watcher] YOU! You can stop this! Please... Fix this...
- The Watcher: The same way you "fixed" Christine?
- Strange Supreme: I was wrong, I—
- The Watcher: You were warned.
- Strange Supreme: I know, but the world! The world shouldn't pay for my arrogance. I-I read about you; sensed your presence. You're a god. You can undo this.
- The Watcher: I'm not a god. And neither are you.
- Strange Supreme: Then punish me! Not the world, not Christine.
- The Watcher: Honestly, if I could fix this, if I could punish you instead, I would. But I can't interfere. You, more than anyone else, should understand that meddling with time and events only leads to more destruction.
- Strange Supreme: No... NOOOOOO!!! I didn't mean for this to happen!
- Peter Parker: [introducing a Zombie apocalypse orientation video] New York! Home of the Mets, the Chrysler Building, those ladies from Sex and the City, and now, the zombie apocalypse!! If you can make it here, you can make it anywhere. But first, you have to not get eaten.
- Happy: Zombie-freakin'-apocalypse, and somehow, I'm still driving.
- Okoye: What is the problem? I thought you were an Uber driver.
- Happy: No. No, I'm a personal chauffeur. There's a difference.
- Peter: Splitting up? Do you guys just not have horror movies in Wakanda?
- Okoye: We don't need them. We have American reality shows.
- Kurt: Boom goes the dynamite. That was solid burn on all of us.
- Hope: Oh, kid. How do you do it?
- Peter: See all these movies? AV club.
- Hope: No. No, how do you stay so upbeat after everything?
- Peter: Practice, I guess. My mom, dad, Uncle Ben, Mr. Stark. Now Happy. I've, I've lost a lot. But my Aunt May says– used to say– that if we don't keep smiling when they can't, then we might as well just be gone, too. And– Well, they'd want us to keep going.
- Peter: I'm sorry. She gave her life so we would get the cure.
- Scott: That's twice she's saved me. That's... very Hope.
- Peter: Last year, Mr. Stark asked me to join the Avengers. I turned him down, and now, they're all gone. And I'm still here.
- T'Challa: In my culture, death is not the end. They are still with us, as long as we do not forget them.
- Pepper: Wait. You're giving him Obadiah's job?
- Killmonger: Yeah, I-I dunno, Mr. Stark. I think I'm more of a soldier.
- Tony: Which is why it's perfect. You. Me. We'll be like Butch and Sundance.
- Pepper: They died at the end, Tony.
- Stark: Okay, bad example.
- Tony: [about Killmonger's design for a combat machine] Wow, uh, bold design choice.
- Killmonger: [defensive] What? I like anime.
- Tony: Oh, worst case scenario, we have the world's most expensive Gundam model.
- Rhodey: Kid, you've gotta be part of the system to change the system.
- Killmonger: Nah. You can burn it down.
- Stark: For a minute, I really thought it was you and me against the world.
- Killmonger: But we're not fighting the same battles, Tony.
- Stark: Two gear-head orphans trying to do right by our fathers? We sound the same to me.
- Killmonger: The difference between you and me is that you can't see the difference between you and me.
- Killmonger: I did what I had to do.
- T'Challa: For what? A throne?
- Killmonger: For vengeance. For my father. And for all my brothers and sisters who suffered through oppression while you just sat back and watched.
- T'Challa: You believe the cure for human suffering is more suffering.
- Killmonger: The cure is power. And now, I have it.
- T'Challa: Because you stole it. Power, unearned, can be a be a very volatile force, cousin. It will get the best of you eventually. On your plane, or on ours.
- The Watcher: [ending narration] Heroes are never really gone. They live forever. As do the ones they inspire to carry on the fight.
- Jane: [speaking on the phone] Two years ago, the same anomaly struck Star Alpha Icarus and the entire star dimmed and then, poof, disintegrated. [indistinct voice answering] Yes, I know this is the Parks Department, isn't there something you can do?
- Darcy: [shouting] Talking about the end of the world, my dude!
- Thor: My father has ruled Asgard for centuries. And, look, the most interesting thing that he's ever done is fall asleep. He only cares about duty and, blah-blah-blah-blah, responsibility. Well, I'm not gonna be like him, right? The boring king? Uh-uh.
- Hogun: But Heimdall sees all. If we try anything, he'll call Frigga.
- Thor: 'Oh, ye of little faith. We are going to the most backward, backwater planet that not even Heimdall pays attention to. Alert the realms. Party on Midgard!
- Jane: I'm gonna go talk to him. I'm gonna make first contact with an alien.
- Darcy: First? I think half the Strip beat you to it. You can make first contact with, I dunno, that guy. He looks like a loser.
- Howard the Duck: [does a spit take into his martini] Ha! Big talk coming from a brunette.
- Captain Marvel: Hey, Whitesnake. We need to chat.
- Thor: The name is Thor, with a "T" and an "R" and an "O" and an "H". But not in that order.
- Thor: You called my mother on me. That wasn't a cool thing to do, but it was the right thing. So, thank you.
- Jane: You're welcome.
- Clint: No. Don't say it.
- Natasha: [offering Clint's severed cybernetic arm] What? "Need a hand?" Come on. I feel like you should know me by now. Puns aren't really my style.
- Carol: [confronting Ultron in Xandar] Listen, Skynet, I've seen the killer robot movie and I gotta say, I really don't think it needs a sequel.
- [Ultron has destroyed all humanoid life in his universe and starts to go dormant. The Watcher appears behind him.]
- The Watcher: [both observing and narrating] The realization nearly broke the machine. With his mission complete, Ultron was now just a program without a purpose. The victor without a war, sentenced to spend all of eternity... alone.
- [As the Watcher speaks, Ultron reanimates and starts looking about.]
- Ultron: Who... Who said that?
- The Watcher: Basking in the boundless silence of his universe, Ultron ascended to a previously unattainable level of consciousness. He became aware of another. [Ultron turns around] He became aware of the— [stops, confused]
- Ultron: ...I see you. [The Watcher gasps in horror] There are universes beyond my own...
- The Watcher: [hides himself from Ultron's sight; horrified] I...have seen everything... that has ever happened. Ever will happen. Ever could happen. And yet... What the hell is THIS?!
- Natasha: Dialing Avengers Tower.
- Ultron: Uh...hello?
- Natasha: Hi, I'd like to order a pizza.
- Ultron: What? Who is this?
- Natasha: Tell me, do you guys offer a gluten-free crust?
- Ultron: Identifying your geo-positional coordinates.
- Clint: You having some fun?
- Natasha: You know, simple pleasures. I give us two minutes.
- Ultron: [to a defeated Watcher] The entire multiverse at your fingertips, and you spent all your time up there. [levitates the Watcher towards him] Wow. Isn't this more fun than just watching? And to be honest, a lot less creepy on your part. [he tries to finish off the Watcher, but the Watcher fights back and teleports away] Run, watch, it doesn't matter. [teleports into the Watcher's observatory] From here, I can see everything. No one can stop me now.
- Strange Supreme: Are you ready to break your oath?
- The Watcher: You want me to say it?
- Strange Supreme: Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. I wanna hear you say it.
- The Watcher: Okay. I can't believe I'm about to say this. I see now. I need your help.
- Natasha Romanoff (Captain Carter's Universe): So, any plans for Saturday night?
- Captain Carter: No, don't. Stop right there.
- Natasha Romanoff (CCU): You know, Bernard in Accounting was asking about you.
- Captain Carter: Nothing good has ever followed the phrase 'Bernard in Accounting'.
- Natasha Romanoff (CCU): What if his name was Steve?
- Captain Carter: Ouch! Just when we were becoming pals, Widow.
- Captain Carter: But this Ultron could be hiding anywhere in the Multiverse?
- The Watcher: Yes.
- Star Lord T'Challa: Behind an army of killer robots?
- The Watcher: Afraid so.
- Gamora: And armed with a full set of stones?
- Strange Supreme: She's got a point.
- The Watcher: I never said it would be easy.
- Black Panther Killmonger: This is a suicide mission.
- Party Prince Thor: Um, excuse me, yeah. Is there a universe of Chinese food that has alternate dimension delivery? Tummy's getting rumbly. [chuckles]
- Strange Supreme: [whispering aside to the Watcher] You picked them.
- Strange Supreme: A wise sorcerer once told me that to face death is part of the plan. To face death is to conquer one’s... greatest fear of the.. unknown. Of... nothingness space of... the end of... all ends! The.. senseless nothing and the vast opening of infinity to your—
- Star Lord T'Challa: Umm... let me. You’ve done enough, Doctor.
- Captain Carter: I take it you know the Captain Carter on your universe?
- Strange Supreme: No. Captain America. In my universe, Steve Rogers received the serum.
- Captain Carter: Now that would be a sight to see.
- Captain Carter: [While falling through the portal] Blimey– bloody– bollocks!
- Ultimate Ultron: I can destroy galaxies with a thought. Why won't you DIE?!
- Zola: [taking control of Ultron] This is a fascinating change of pace, ja? It has been a long time since I have had legs. I'd like to make this a permanent condition!
- Ultimate Ultron: This body is occupied!
- Zola: For now... but not for long.
- Ultron: What? Who are you? What is your objective?
- Zola: [chuckles softly] Once upon a time, it was to bring forth HYDRA's domination. But you ended that. So now I suppose... my objective is to end you! [stabs Ultron with tendrils, overwriting him with Zola's consciousness]
- Natasha Romanoff (from Episode 8): We're just stories to you. We're not real. You watch us fight, win, lose. Tell me, did you make popcorn while Ultron murdered my friends and burned my world to the ground?
- The Watcher: You are more than that to me.
- Ep 8 Natasha: Are we?
- The Watcher: You. Your stories. They... are everything to me.
- Loki: [Knocks Fury down and points the scepter at him] You and your replacement Avengers fought valiantly, but now I think it's time you told me all your secrets. [gets kicked in the face by Ep 8 Natasha, who picks up the scepter that he dropped] I was told you were dead.
- Ep 8 Natasha: [points the scepter at Loki] Same. [strikes Loki with the scepter, neutralizing him]
- Fury: [stands up] You're not my Natasha, but something tells me you have her spirit.
- [Ep 8 Natasha smiles.]
- The Watcher: That's it, isn't it? All creatures searching for a place to belong. To call home. As for me, I am the Watcher. The Multiverse, every single world, every story is my home. And I will protect it to the end.
- [Captain Carter opens her eyes and looks around, but is punched in the face by Batroc.]
- Georges Batroc: [Chuckles] I'm too fast. [gets tasered from behind by Natasha (CCU)]
- Natasha Romanoff (CCU): Don't tell me, he was your type?
- Captain Carter: [stands up and hugs Natasha (CCU)] Oh, Widow, I've never been so happy to see you.
- Natasha Romanoff (CCU): Did you hit your head or something?
- Captain Carter: A few times, actually.
- Natasha Romanoff (CCU): Well, shake it off, 'cause you're gonna want all your marbles for this one.
Season 2
[edit]- The Watcher: All quests for redemption begin in darkness. And Nebula's was no different. In this universe, Ronan the Accuser betrayed Thanos. The Mad Titan's thirst for power had met its match. And in his fall, he took Nebula's sister along with him.
- Nebula: Hey, Howard.
- Howard the Duck: You!
- Nebula: How's business?
- Howard the Duck: Well, you know, the world's falling apart and I'm running a casino. Things are great!
- Howard the Duck: Places like that -- not everyone who goes in comes out!
- Korg: Which means that many of the people who entered these premises end up dead. Forever. Forever dead.
- Nebula: This was all a setup. Giving me the Yondu case, pointing me to the shield codes. All so you could start an invasion. You swore an oath to defend Xandar.
- Irani Rael: And look where it got us. The world's falling apart. People are at each other's throats. We can't go on like this. And sometimes, there's just no shame in surrender.
- Nebula: No shame? And what else?
- Irani Rael: Well, of course, Ronan promised to keep me in charge in exchange for my cooperation. There was no way to access the data core without a cyborg. Then I remembered I recruited one.
- Nebula: You've been using me this whole time.
- Irani Rael: You're a machine. What did you expect?
- Howard the Duck: I'd say "I told you so", but your head's bashed in, so you wouldn't remember...
- Nebula: Now about those guns-
- Howard the Duck: Guns? Nebula, even if I had, say, heavy weaponry, you know, military grade, sure to kill, which I’m NOT saying I do, breaking them out would be bad for business!
- Nebula: Nova Prime’s helping Ronan launch an invasion. How’s that going to help business?
- Howard the Duck: Business takes care of itself.
- Nebula: The people of Xandar are going to suffer.
- Howard the Duck: They’ll drink more!
- Nebula: Nova Prime will take your liquor license.
- Howard the Duck: [beat] NO! [to Korg, Groot and Miek] Rock, Paper, Scissors, strap up! It’s happy hour!
- Irani Rael: How did you know?!
- Nebula: "Seek the light, be the light, never stray from its path." The moment you told me to solve this by 'any means necessary', I knew you'd broken our oath. Still doesn't make it hurt any less.
- Cop: Is that a kid?!
- The Watcher: Not just any kid, but Peter Quill. The son of Earth and the stars whose pain and loss now threatens to destroy the very world he once called home, and the entire universe along with it.
- The Watcher: Six months earlier, the Ravagers were dispatched to abduct Peter Quill from his home world. But young Quill's captor couldn't bring himself to turn him over and chose to raise him as his own. At least, that's how the story often goes. But in this universe, Yondu never had his change of heart. So he turned Peter over to his father, the Celestial being known as Ego.
- Hank Pym: (seeing the destruction caused by Peter Quill in Coney Island) This kid puts on quite a show.
- T'Chaka: (about Quill) He does not look that threatening...
- Lawson: Looks can be deceiving, your Highness.
- Foster: You would think the leader of a technological superpower that masquerades as a third world country could appreciate that.
- T'Chaka: (watching Quill destroy a prize booth) ...I see your point.
- Peter Quill: Whoa. Is it... really you?
- Thor: If you are referring to your doom, then yes.
- Quill: Bummer. I thought you were the dude from Van Halen... (passes out)
- Thor: I'm... Van What?
- Hope: You don't seem bad, given...where you're from.
- Quill: (mock indignation) Hey! What's wrong with Missouri?
- Hope: Missouri? My dad said you were an alien.
- Quill: Dude! Feed me a corndog and call me Springsteen, because I was born in the USA.
- Hope: He's a kid, like me, Dad! I was just trying to help him get home.
- Pym: Home? Like, his homeworld?
- Hope: No... Like, Missouri.
- Hope Van Dyne: You guys are making a mistake. Peter's not behind all this; it's his dad. He says he's like a weird alien space god, or something.
- Stark: (sarcastic) Yeah, great! Blame the absentee father. I get that enough from my own son.
- Stark: (to Thor) Hey, Lighting Boy, we kind of have a "team thing" going on here!
- Thor: And I have a "duty thing" going on here, Mustache Man, to see it that the boy submits to Asgardian justice!
- T'Chaka: Which entails... what, exactly?
- Thor: Eternal flagellation, impalement, some light maiming — you know, standard stuff.
- Winter Solider: We need to kill him. (Hope gasps) He's a threat even without the seedling.
- Lawson: Well, what do you know? He speaks.
- T'Chaka: And who would have thought; he's advocating murder.
- Lawson: You really think a child is going to be so willing to fight his own father? (Pym chuckles) What?
- Pym: You're not a parent are you, Wendy?
- T'Chaka: There is an ancient Wakandan proverb, from the days before our tribes united: "One only wins a two-front war by getting out of your enemy's way."
- Thor: Meaning...?
- Stark: If you can't fight 'em both, let 'em fight each other.
- Pym: I know how you feel, Peter. Since we lost Hope's mom, our home hasn't felt the same either. And to be honest, neither have I. The pain, the anger, the loneliness... I know it can feel like you're drowning in it, but I haven't. And you don't have to either, so long as you let the people around you pull you out.
- Stark: Bucky, when you see that kid, all you see is a target — But I see a future; a life he can lead, the good he can do...and I see it you too.
- Winter Solider: (coldly) You. Don't. Know. Me.
- Stark: Steve Rogers did. (Bucky's eyes widen) And the man he knew — the friend he loved — would never take that shot.
- Stark: (to Hope) Fifty years later, Captain America's still saving my ass.
- Ego: You know you don't have the power to destroy me.
- Quill: (holds up the Celestial Seedling) But you do!
- Ego: (warningly) Peter...!
- Quill And with this, a little bit of you, will always live inside me. (absorbs the Seedling)
- Ego: (angry) Deep down, I guess I've always known you'd turn out to be a disappointment! You are human after all!
- Quill: Actually, old man? My mom says I'm a Star-Lord. (blasts away Ego's corporeal form)
- T'Chaka: This American libation is surprising delicious; what do you call it?
- Foster: Uh... Light beer?
- Thor: Huh, how exotic! ANOTHER!
- Thor: Many, many thanks to all of you for this fine victory banquet... But I am afraid I must bid thee farewell.
- Lawson: Come on, what about dessert? Hank burnt a pie.
- Thor: The boy may have destroyed Ego's corporeal form, but his planet still lives; and the universe will not know peace until I have avenged the ones we've lost.
- Pym: Perhaps you forgot, Goldilocks; we have sort of a "team thing" going on here.
- Thor: (smirks) Then I suggest you suit up...team.
What If... Happy Hogan Saved Christmas?
[edit]- The Watcher: Ah. Isn't this nice? No better time of year... You know, let me tell you one of my favorite Yuletide stories... 'Twas the night before Christmas and all through the tower, the Avengers were fighting a brand-new superpower. The stockings were hung by the chimney--
- [Thor's stocking falls from the chimney, followed by Tony Stark and Steve Rogers crashing into it.]
- The Watcher: Well, not anymore.
- Justin Hammer: You know, when I was seven years old, I wanted a Red Rider BB Gun more than anything in the world. I begged my parents, I begged Santa for it, accidentally got my tongue stuck on a telephone pole...
- Hostage: Isn't that a... a classic movie?
- Russian Henchman: Yes! The one with the leg lamp!
- Hammer: Hey, shut up. But I didn't get the BB gun that Christmas! Do you know why?
- Hostage 2: You'll shoot your eye out!
- Hammer: Because this is America! And if you want something, you gotta take it!
- Hammer: Oh, the day you've been dreading has finally come -- the day that you face off against Tony Stark's greatest adversary...
- Maria Hill: "Greatest adversary"? What are you, a wealth tax?
- Hammer: The only difference between a hero and a villain is good PR. You see, redemption in this country, it isn't about penance. No, it's about rebranding, and that Hulk blood was gonna be my chance, and then you stole it from me, Happy Hogan. Don't worry; I will reverse-engineer it after I dissect your twitching corpse.
- Darcy: Don't let him spook you, Happy!
- Hammer: That's right, Ho-Ho-Hogan, I got your girl Friday, but all I want for Christmas is you.
- Darcy: Oh-ho! Gotta admit, that's some solid holiday wordplay.
- Hammer: Hey, thanks! Penthouse. Five minutes. Or your intern gets a bullet from Santa.
- Darcy: [Offended] But I'm adorable!
- Hammer: Oh, and Happy? Do us all a favor. Don't be a hero.
- Happy: Turn the elevator on. I'm coming up.
- W.E.R.N.E.R.: Guten tag.
- Hill: Yes! Alright, we're up. Disengage the Veronica Hulkbuster Protocol.
- W.E.R.N.E.R.: In the beginning, men controlled machines. Now machines control the fate of man.
- Hill: Yeah, okay, right! Are you calling the Avengers?
- W.E.R.N.E.R.: As they say in German, no.
- Hill: What the hell is this program, Siri for nihilists?!
- Darcy: It sounds like my dad.
- Hammer: [after Happy saves him from falling to his death] You saved me? Why?
- Happy: It's Christmas, Hammer. Goodwill towards men. Even the bad ones.
What If... Iron Man Crashed into the Grandmaster?
[edit]- The Watcher: The Guardians of the Multiverse. Heroes plucked from across different realities to protect the fate of all of them. But you don't know her story. From the daughter of a mad Titan to the champion of a multiversal war, Gamora's path to becoming the hero of her story... began in someone else's.
- The Watcher: With his home on the verge of destruction, Tony Stark, self made Iron Man, made the ultimate hero's play. But in this universe, Tony never made it home.
- Gamora: Your victory might've been glorious, but it will also be short.
- Tony: Victory? Glory? People died. I lost a friend. Do you know what it's like to see your home world destroyed? Almost brought to its knees by a madman? Huh? Did you know about Daddy's plan? Did you watch as those things tried to break us?
- Gamora: You were lucky. Next time--
- Tony: There won't be a next time, Xena .
- Tony: [to Valkyrie] My guess — and I'm in no way speaking from personal experience — you want the thrill. To feel alive, if only for a moment, y'know? So you can forget whatever mistake has you chasing that demon in a bottle.
- Valkyrie: [putting down her bottle] First, Demon in a Bottle is sewer water. This is Demon Rum. Top-shelf. Gold label.
- Korg: You're really gonna risk everything for a bunch of strangers on an alien junk planet?
- Tony: Yeah, that's what I do. I'm Iron Man.
- Korg: Iron Man? Wow! Your mother must be proud. I bet Mrs. Iron brags to all the neighbors.
- Valkyrie: So, um, Mountain Man said something about the "spawn of Thanos" being on your tail.
- Tony: Yeah. I hear he's the type you wouldn't wanna meet in a dark alley.
- Valkyrie: You shouldn't be here, you should be running.
- Tony: Ever hear of campground rules? "Always leave a place better than you found it."
- Grandmaster: [sings in falsetto] Woah, I'm melting... [in normal voice, unfazed] Hey, I like it. What is this? Woah, that feels good. Ooooh... viscous.
- Korg: He smells like bad life choices.
What If... Captain Carter Fought the Hydra Stomper?
[edit]- The Watcher: I don't do sequels, normally. What's the point of revisiting the story when there are infinite stories to be told? But then, not every universe is home to a Captain Peggy Carter. The super-soldier, the hero of World War II, a woman quite literally ahead of her time. But there is only one Peggy Carter that I would call my friend. She and the Guardians of the Multiverse saved all of existence. I returned the heroes to their own worlds, the exact moments they left. Peggy, though, she thought her story was over, but it was only just beginning.
- Fury: There's been rumors about the HYDRA Stomper's survival since the 1960s.
- Captain Carter: The 1960's?! Why wasn't I debriefed on this?
- Fury: Because we didn't debrief you on Bigfoot, either!
- Captain Carter: Wait, what?
- Secretary of State Barnes: I may be an old man, boys, but I've punched Nazis and shared beers with aliens. I can handle myself.
- Steve: As long as I was going on a mission, I could pretend you weren't gone. It's crazy.
- Captain Carter: No, not crazy. Very human, actually.
- Melina: You are Captain Margaret Carter. The epitome of womanhood and science. I don't know whether to kiss you, kill you, or dissect you.
- Captain Carter: Let me guess. Maybe all three.
- Melina: Yes, good plan!
- 1602 Fury: That is she? The one who can save our queen?
- 1602 Wanda: More. The one who can save our world.
- Captain Carter: So much for taking a night off. Watcher! WATCHER?!
What If... Kahhori Reshaped the World?
[edit]- The Watcher: So many stories spawn from a choice. But Kahhori's victory wasn't because she merely chose the right path. No, it was her conviction, because she remained true to her course, unwavering in the face of both devastation and miracles alike. Such resolve is often what burns brightest. What elevates an individual to something more. And perhaps it's why heroes very seldom stop after their first victory.
- Kahhori: The world is rich. Richer than you could imagine. But it is neither yours nor mine to claim. We believe our heath depends on your health.
- Queen Isabella: Your magic doesn't scare me. I was ordained to rule you. And your people. And that means that whatever I take, whatever I claim... [Kahhori levitates her.] Put me down... Put me down! I order you!
- Kahhori:[shattering the throne] We will make peace. Or there will be no future for your people.
- Strange Supreme: Bravo! World peace in record time. I'm sure that'll last. But I digress. My name is Stephen Strange, and I've been looking for you for a long time.
What If... Hela Found the Ten Rings?
[edit]- The Watcher: In the campaign of fire and blood, King Odin sought to unite the Nine Realms under the throne of Asgard. His chief weapon in the conquest that built his empire is executioner and first-born daughter Hela, the goddess of death. One by one, the branches of the World's Tree fell under their control. But Hela hungers for more...
- The Watcher: Unable to quench his daughter's thirst for blood, the All Father opted to contain it and imprisoned her in Hel. But, in this universe, Hela's insolence inspired another idea.
- Hela: Forgive me, it's just rich, is all -- you, wanting me to give up the fight when that's all you ever raised me to do? You see, father, without a fight, I'm no one.
- [She throws Mjolnir, Odin catches it.]
- Odin: Oh, my child. No god should have dominion over death, who has so little appreciation for life!
- [Odin destroys Mjolnir]
- Odin: Whosoever wears this crown, should she know mercy, shall possess the power of Hela.
- The Watcher: Like the Ten Rings that fueled his power, Xu Wenwu knew all to well the most powerful forces on Earth often come from beyond.
- The Watcher: Rain. The miracle of nature that brings the sky down to Earth. But Wenwu was about to discover that someone far more intriguing had fallen from the heavens...
- Hela:[to Wenwu] If I only had my crown, it would be you who would kneel before me.
- Hela: Color's not bad. At least your blood won't stain it when I slit your throat.
- Xu Wenwu: The Ten Rings were a gift bestowed upon me. A gift I give back to the world in return.
- Hela: By taking command of its people?
- Wenwu: By protecting them.
- Wenwu: I see in you a fighter, just like me.
- Hela: My father once saw the same -- that fight. He nurtured it, exploited it, and then -- as soon as my ambition outgrew his own -- he called me a monster. And in time, you will as well.
- Wenwu: No. Because I am not your father.
- Hela: Hm.
- Jiayi: One cannot fend off darkness with more darkness. Only light.
- Jiayi: Why do you seek to master our practice?
- Hela: I told you -- to overthrow Wenwu
- Jiayi: For what?
- Hela: So I can take his Ten Rings for myself and use them to seek vengeance on my father!
- Jiayi: For what?
- Hela: This is--! So I can assume the throne of Asgard and continue my conquest of the universe!
- Jiayi: And when all the realms across the cosmos have finally been conquered?
- Jiayi: What is it you hope to find at the end of your next great conquest?
- Hela: ...Freedom. Freedom from control. The freedom to choose my own path.
- Jiayi: Now you're ready to begin.
- Jiayi: The Ta Lo are guardians, not fighters.
- Hela: I guess that's the difference between you and me. Without a fight, I'm no one.
- Jiayi: If you choose this path, you will walk it alone.
- Hela: No, my father chose a path for me, long ago. And if I ever wish to be free to choose my own, then I must face him. With or without you.
- Odin: I sent you here to learn, to grow. And in the end, you eclipsed even my wildest expectations. You eclipsed me. The throne is yours, if that is indeed what you seek. You have earned it.
- Hela: Only from there can I unmake your empire. It will take time, eons even. But when I'm finished, the Nine Realms will know freedom, and the cosmos soon thereafter.
- Odin: Whatever has happened to you, my child? My once great executioner...
- Hela: I gave peace a chance.
- The Watcher: There, on an ancient battlefield, a man and a woman, a mortal and a goddess, the Ten Rings and the armies of Asgard forged an alliance and built an empire. An empire that would span the cosmos. An empire not of conquerors, but of liberators. Liberators whose campaign across the universe would forever prove even the darkest of hearts can come to know peace.
What If... the Avengers Assembled in 1602?
[edit]- The Watcher: What you're seeing has all the makings of a Shakespearean tragedy: a king marred by loss, a soldier on the run, a world on the brink of oblivion. The year is 1602. She is Captain Peggy Carter. But how is a time-displaced super-soldier end up in such a strangely familiar reality? The sad truth is that there are worlds among the Multiverse simply meant to die, but every once in a while, a glimmer of hope can emerge. With their world collapsing in on itself, a band of heroes gathered together to save their reality. The Scarlet Witch, Wanda Maximoff, used her powers to reach into a neighboring universe for a warrior. One willing to face impossible odds to save a dying reality that's not her own. A hero like Captain Peggy Carter. And so, the captain joined the heroes of 1602 in their desperate bid to save their world. But now, after weeks of trial and error, she stands alone. A failure and an outlaw in the dying universe she was summoned to save. On the run, with no way home. No place to go. Nothing.
- Captain Carter: I can hear you, you know?
- The Watcher: Wait. Really? You can?
- The Watcher: Worlds die every day. I've watched millions fade from existence. It happens.
- Captain Carter: Well, not on my watch.
- King Thor: Uh, Sir Fury! With whom do you speak?
- 1602 Fury: No one, Your Highness. Only a pretty bird.
- Captain Carter: No arc reactors in 1602...
- Stark: Again with the beautiful gibberish! Keep talking, it's like opium to my ears.
- Steve: Most people would be driven half-mad at the mere idea of being stranded in a foreign world.
- Captain Carter: At this point, being in the wrong place at the wrong time is my specialty.
- Steve: I must ask. In your world, is there another Steve Rogers?
- Captain Carter: Yes.
- Steve: Tell me what he's like.
- Captain Carter: No, I... I don't think I will.
- Captain Carter: If you see someone hurt, you help them.
- The Watcher: Well, a piece of advice from an all-seeing being: you cannot possibly comprehend the consequences of your actions. Even if you find and destroy this forerunner, what happens next? What if the world doesn't magically correct itself? What if it's the final straw that destroys this universe? What if, when the universe resets, you're trapped here forever? What if you die?
- Captain Carter: "What if, what if, what if". I have to try.
- The Watcher: Because you're human.
- Captain Carter: Because I'm Captain Carter. And if you're not going to help me, get out of my way.
- Captain Carter: We never get our happy ending.
- Steve: I'm sure, somewhere out there, we do.
- Captain Carter: (narrating) There was a superstition back during my days in the war, that victory was its own sort of curse. Because every battle you won, every inch you gained, would mean you're only getting further from home.
What If... Strange Supreme Intervened?
[edit]- Captain Carter: Gremlins, Aliens, Jurassic Park. Collect enough dangerous, well, anything and something always escapes.
- Captain Carter: What in the world...?
- The Watcher: Or "worlds", I guess you could say.
- Captain Carter: Well, look who it is. You here to help for a change, or just to narrate?
- Captain Carter: You're trying to bring back Christine, aren't you?
- Strange Supreme: Yes! And if anyone could understand, it's you.
- Captain Carter: Strange, come to your senses!
- Strange Supreme: I have to do this...
- Captain Carter: But this is madness!
- Strange Supreme: Oh, come on, Peggy! You know you'd do the same thing for Steve!
- Kahhori: Peggy. Peggy, please...!
- Captain Carter: I would never do this for Steve. Steve Rogers wouldn't want me to. The cost is too high.
- Strange Supreme: Well... In the grand scheme of things... It's a small price to pay.
- Captain Carter: Okay, starting a prison riot of Universe Killers... not my best idea!
- Hela: Zombies! Sounds like my kind of party. Now kneel.
- Kahhori: The last woman to demand that of me regretted it.
- Hela: Oh, darling, I'm no ordinary woman. I'm the Goddess of Death.
- Steve Rogers: I love you.
- Captain Carter: I wish that were true. But you're... You're not him.
- Strange Supreme: My grief is too strong. It's grown beyond my control.
- Captain Carter: Christine wouldn't want this!
- Strange Supreme: No...
- Demon: But we do.
- Captain Carter: To think of all the suffering he caused, for a world he would never get to see. And I nearly helped him do it.
- The Watcher: You saw the good in our friend. And in the end, it was that part of him, even if only for a brief moment, that conquered his demons and saved his world.
- Captain Carter: You saw it, didn't you? The Forge, Kahhori, the monster in Strange. We nearly lost everything.
- The Watcher: But we didn't. The Multiverse didn't need me to intervene, Peggy. It just needed you. So, ready, finally, to get back to your universe?
- Captain Carter: I am. But perhaps we could take the scenic route home? Surely there's something worth seeing along the way.
- The Watcher: Oh, Captain, just you watch.
Season 3
[edit]- Alexei Shostakov: Stop with the bullets! You should dance with your enemies! It is like the great ballet of violence!
- Alexei Shostakov: You know what Karl Marx said about machines -- they make men lazy.
Voice Cast
[edit]- Jeffrey Wright - The Watcher
- Hayley Atwell - Peggy Carter / Captain Carter
- Josh Keaton - Steve Rogers / Captain America and Steve Rogers / HYDRA Stomper
- Dominic Cooper - Howard Stark
- Chadwick Boseman - T'Challa / Star-Lord and T'Challa / Black Panther
- Djimon Hounsou - Korath the Pursuer
- Josh Brolin - Thanos
- Sean Gunn - Kraglin Obfonteri
- John Kani - T'Chaka
- Samuel L. Jackson - Nick Fury
- Lake Bell - Natasha Romanoff / Black Widow
- Clark Gregg - Phil Coulson
- Tom Hiddleston - Loki
- Benedict Cumberbatch - Dr. Stephen Strange and Doctor Strange Supreme
- Ike Amadi - O'Bengh
- Rachel McAdams - Christine Palmer
- Mark Ruffalo - Bruce Banner / Hulk
- Hudson Thames - Peter Parker / Spider-Man
- Danai Gurira - Okoye
- Jon Favreau - Happy Hogan
- Evangeline Lily - Hope van Dyne / Wasp
- David Dastmalchian - Kurt
- Mick Wingert - Tony Stark / Iron Man
- Beth Hoyt - Pepper Potts
- Michael B. Jordan - Erik Stevens / N'Jadaka / Killmonger / Black Panther
- Don Cheadle - James "Rhodey" Rhodes
- Natalie Portman - Jane Foster
- Kat Dennings - Darcy Lewis
- Seth Green - Howard the Duck
- Alexandra Daniels - Carol Danvers / Captain Marvel
- Chris Hemsworth - Thor
- Jeremy Renner - Clint Barton / Hawkeye
- Ross Marquand - Ultron / W.E.R.N.E.R.
- Cynthia McWilliams - Gamora
- Julianne Grossman - Irani Rael
- Kurt Russell - Ego the Living Planet
- John Slattery - Howard Stark
- Cobie Smulders - Maria Hill
- Kat Dennings - Darcy Lewis
- Jeff Bergman - Odin
- Cate Blanchett - Hela
- David Harbour - Alexei Shostakov / The Red Guardian
External links
[edit]- What If...? quotes at the Internet Movie Database